Listen. Don't talk to me like I'm some kinda friggin' chump. Alright? Because I'm not.

I'm a businessman. I'm a family man. Man of the people. Man of the church. Man of the country. I'm a patriot. A veteran. A man of god. A missionary. A postman. I work at jamba juice, okay? My dog is spayed. I got letters ready for me at the notary republic. I know a cobbler. I make my own quilts. Love eggs. Shop locally. I support local causes. I take a cruise ship every 3 months. I wear reading glasses. My daughter has braces. My eyebrows are shaved And my friends are all geese. I live in a house. I have a head. My clothes are all combustible. My medicine is over the counter except for one prescription. I have a shirt that reads "If you don't like me, I'll go frick your mother." I am inside of the matrix. I live in a home with no windows. I have lasers inside my brain I have a shark in my bathroom. My dog sleeps in my bed with me. I have mouse under the rug. My friends are all dead. I went to india once. I like bowling.

So don't talk to me like I'm some kinda ♥♥♥♥♥♥' chump, alright? Because I'm not.