One does not simply kiss into Mordor's Ass.

There is no way into the mountain.

ʇɥɹǝǝ ɹıuƃs ɟoɹ ʇɥǝ ǝןʌǝu-ʞıuƃs nupǝɹ ʇɥǝ sʞʎ
sǝʌǝu ɟoɹ ʇɥǝ pʍɐɹɟ-ןoɹps ıu ʇɥǝıɹ ɥɐןןs oɟ sʇouǝ
uıuǝ ɟoɹ ɯoɹʇɐן ɯǝu pooɯǝp ʇo pıǝ
ouǝ ɟoɹ ʇɥǝ pɐɹʞ ןoɹp ou ɥıs pɐɹʞ ʇɥɹouǝ
ıu ʇɥǝ ןɐup oɟ ɯoɹpoɹ ʍɥǝɹǝ ʇɥǝ sɥɐpoʍs ןıǝ
ouǝ ɹıuƃ ʇo ɹnןǝ ʇɥǝɯ ɐןן' ouǝ ɹıuƃ ʇo ɟıup ʇɥǝɯ
ouǝ ɹıuƃ ʇo qɹıuƃ ʇɥǝɯ ɐןן ɐup ıu ʇɥǝ pɐɹʞuǝss qıup ʇɥǝɯ
ıu ʇɥǝ ןɐup oɟ ɯoɹpoɹ ʍɥǝɹǝ ʇɥǝ sɥɐpoʍs ןıǝ

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