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(2 edits) ( 2)

Hi. I tried your AVN and found it was not to my liking. I didn't get far to be honest.

I found it to be too confusing. Worse it was too confusing very early on. By that I mean that I could not build any empathy with any of the characters because I was confused by the plot.

Its hard for me to care about a story or its plot when I don't have any empathy for the characters. I think you need to take a little more time introducing some of the characters before the plot begins to unfold.

For example: The MCs mother is taken away during the mysterious event during the introduction right? But why should I care when no time is taken to introduce her or explain her relationship to the MC? Is she kind? Is she strict? Is she hard working? I dont know!

Another example: Theres this girl introduced when the MC first sets off to school. I dont even know her name because I didn't care about her. She is clearly meant to be a love interest, apparently she and the MC have been intimate before. Yet the MC doesn't remember her and feels only the most base physical attraction to her.

So I say again, why should I care when I know almost nothing about the character? I mean I dont even remember her name!