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Stone wasn’t sure what he was getting himself into. After proving his intellect within the field and his tolerance for unpredictable occurrences and people, the government practically came pleading to him to accept a new position looking after someone they described as “bedlamite.”
“He’s an absolute nut job, he makes the environment around him intolerable to share. He is even greedy with the oxygen in his vicinity. He’s unhinged, deranged, unbalanced, out to lunch- bananas-“.
Stone wasn’t sure why the officer was selling the job this way, did they want him to accept it or not? Of course, Stone would.
He had grown tired of mediocrity within the system and his status. He had always assumed being an agent would be more engaging, and while he enjoyed the occasional missions, most of his work was done simply keeping the imbecilic fat cats from revealing their insolence and ineptitude to the public. The” national security” work he always seemed to work on was merely trying to find different ways to describe the government's actions in the least war crime language he could.
He enjoyed the chaos, but he could be working for someone so much better. Someone who had the intellect to understand what the title “agent” even meant. He was tired of being treated like a glorified secretary. At least, by these moronic tycoons.
He was a pushover, he knew that. He wasn’t going to waste his energy arguing with people who refused to put any time into a simple Google search or to allow for a single thought to flow through their synapses.
There was no point to it, so he simply followed in the direction they would point, eventually leading him to here. The job no one else would take.
As he analyzed the corridors of the facility that had no record in any available government documents, he found his lips part in amazement at its display.
To the untrained eyes, it was a mediocre black hallway lit only by the red lights that peaked from the floors. It seemed to loom on forever in an eerie way. Every few feet was presented with some odd contraption, quite literally placed upon a silver platter.
It was almost like a maze navigating through the corridors- or perhaps- a labyrinth. The way everything was structured, the architecture of it all… Stone knew there was so much more to it, but he couldn’t quite figure out what. Perhaps he could pick someone’s brain… perhaps the person who even conceptualized this confusing masterpiece.
“It’s quite empty for a laboratory, especially of its size. You’d think he'd have a few employees to help keep the joint standing,” Stone tried to offer to the officer escorting him through the halls, eagerly examining the map he was given to navigate the place.
“This Wacko prefers no human contact. He’s obsessed with machines. Talks about them like he personally carried them for nine months and nurtured them until they became big strong software. Any job he doesn’t want to do he simply codes a new program or builds a new machine to do it for him. Plus, no one lasts a few days with that guy. No matter how hard they try.” He seemed to eye Stone with a smug look he distasted.
He tried to offer a slight smirk in response, “So, why the sudden need for someone like me?”
“Ah… I’m not sure, apparently he’s worked with a few guys before. Sorta kept him in line for the government, a babysitter in some way, and kept him on a leash. Made sure whatever he did was being communicated to the best capability to the Feds. But half the people can hardly understand what he’s saying or tolerate his behavior. Not even the smartest of guys. Our last guy was removed personally by the Dr himself. Went on some rant about human incompetence…like ok buddy.”
He snorted in such a way it made it hard for Stone not to roll his eyes. Like this man even knew what the term incompetence meant.
“In any sense, you’ll be lucky to only have a few days with this guy. Hopefully, they pull you out before you lose your marbles too. Some of the guys are betting you only last 48 hours. But I’ve got confidence in yah sport, I said at least 3 days.” He patted him on the shoulder, Stone tried to offer a casual chuckle, hiding the offense he took from his comment.
“Don’t disappoint me!” The officer called after him as he handed him a key card and left with no further instructions.
Relief filled Stone, he wasn’t sure how much longer he could tolerate such a presence. Surely dealing with the doctor would be easier now… As he lifted the keycard against the scanner he could hear a faint noise coming from inside the lab. A… thumping sound. It sounded like… music. Classic…80s…. Groovy… strange. Intriguing.
The keycard bent as the computer beeped in approval, quickly opening the doors to welcome him in.
Before he could take in what he was seeing, a computer voice filled the open room, echoing against the walls lined with projected computer-like technology.
“Doctor, your oblation has arrived.”
The music suddenly stopped as Stone looked up to a figure who looked as if he was placed upon a high-perched platform. It started to lower like a musical theatre set piece, circling slowly to reveal the doctor's form.
His face was folded in a grin, his mustache took the shape of his face, and his eyes looked eager with amusement. One eyebrow was raised comically while the other twitched. Stone wasn’t sure what he was seeing… it almost seemed- unreal.
“Well aren’t you just an eager beaver,” he teased in a babyish tone,” never had anyone ever taken up the role of my assistant so fast. You must either be delusional in thinking you can fit within my ever so crowded mind palace- or you’re simply some poor sap they threw into the gutter- a gutter by the charming name of-“ he seemed to extend his hand, his eyes grew wide as he awaited a response.
Stone had hardly realized he was waiting for him to speak, his tongue tripped over his words as he tried to gather his thoughts,
“D-Dr! Dr. Ivo Robotnik- it’s a pleasure to be here I’ve heard so much about your accomplishments-“
He cut him off with a swift hand movement like a zipper being closed,
“First name basis aren’t we keen? Simply refer to me as: Doctor, Dr. Robotnik, Doc, Dr. Rubidium Nitrogen Iodine Potassium, 医生- either one suits me well.”
“Oh… Ok- doctor” he went on,
“ I was almost tempted to change my last name to Doctor so that any possible Kin that could ever extend from my lineage would be able to proudly wear the Doctor family name.. but I realized Dr. Doctor was a bit too redundant… and in no universe would I ever create any life form that wasn’t made from some good old blood sweat and RUST.”
He gave Stone a grin that seemed to consume him like a serpent suffocating its prey.
Despite his body's insistence on activating his flight reaction, he found his mind indulged with the nature of the Doctor. He was fascinated that such an esteemed and awarded individual would actively present themselves in such a way. It was charming, a bit intimidating, but it wasn’t like anything he had ever interacted with before. He felt drawn to its energy.
“Of course, Doctor,” was all he could muster.
Robotnik's grin shifted into an obviously forced customer service smile.
“Seeing as you are still hanging around, how about I set you up for your first task as my new assistant?”
The doctor placed his hands firmly around Stones's shoulders, earnestly leading him towards a digitized clock presented with the traditional Roman numeral design.
“What time is it, agent?”
Stone wasn’t sure if this was some sort of test to see if he could read a clock, he tried to take his mind away from the shock of it all which he still had not fully absorbed.
“It’s 9:02 am- sir.”
“Correcto, late morning. A time when The consumption of caffeine is most appropriate.”
“You want me to get you a coffee, Sir?”
“I desire a beverage of Italian origin served in a 230 mL cup with a single shot of espresso and steamed Austrian goat milk slowly poured at a relatively high position and continue to pour whilst lowering the milk and steepening your pouring angle to Ensure a small amount of stiff milk foam sits on top after pouring.”
Stone took a second to absorb all of what he was told,
“So… you want a Latte with steamed Austrian goat's milk?”
While Stone usually would internally scoff at having to do such errands, something about the doctor's request intrigued him.
“Precisely. Because of my unique sleep schedule my Cortisol levels significantly lower around 9-11 am and spike around midnight. Meaning I will need a caffeinated beverage if I am to remain productive within the time frame I have provided you. A failure to do this will tell me all I need to know about your future performance and servitude towards me.”
He patted Stone aggressively on the cheek. Stone wasn’t sure why he suddenly was filled with a determination and desperation to fulfill a coffee order that was so strong- but he felt a desire to be needed and useful to this…Doctor Robotnik.
It was a coffee order, yes, but it was also a test. A test he so desperately did not want to fail. Just within the few moments of meeting this man he had never been so Intrigued and infatuated with someone else’s mind and character. If he wants to explore him closer, he would have to be the best goddam assistant ever to grace the earth. He couldn’t throw this opportunity away. He needed to get him that Latte with steamed Austrian goat milk in record time…
Stone ran through the halls trying to remember how to navigate this labyrinth. Even the building itself was testing his mind and memory. A latte with steamed Austrian goat milk wobbled between his grasps. One hand was on the top of the lid while the other firmly held its sides. He was doing his best to prevent any further coupling of the two substances.
10:56 am… he only had a few minutes before the doctor's Cortisol levels no longer remained in the range of 3-10 mcg/dL.
With his hair a mess, sweat dripping down his brow wearing the clothes and nametag of some poor sap who had the misfortune of crossing him near the cafe, he busted through Robotnik's door and skidded to a halt, checking to see the latte was still warm and relatively all in the cup.
“Doctor- your latte with steamed Austrian goat's milk,” he tried his best to not sound out of breath.
Robotnik did not comment, but instead, mimicked the whirs and buzzes of machinery as he turned to look at Stone and approached him.
Stone dropped his hands to his sides quickly as the doctor took the latte in his grasp. He could feel his heart tremor, he wasn't sure how the doctor would react if it did not meet his expectations-or if it did. He was unreadable… it intrigued him but at the same time unnerved him.
He watched carefully as the doctor parted his lips and took a sip of the latte, and suddenly, he froze. His face was a blank slate, almost like it was a computer computing a new code given to it. The only thing that broke his frozen state was when he smacked his lips repeatedly and shifted his eyes. He was analyzing, and each twitch of his face caused more anxiety within Stone.
It seemed one sip wasn't enough for him to create a proper analysis, so he took another, swishing it between his cheeks and taking a dramatic gulp.
“Hm..” was the only noise he made.
Stone felt the heat leave his face, his fingers growing numb. What did that mean? He wasn’t being shoved out of the room or incinerated by one of his machines so surely that was a good sign?
“This is…” he titled his head,” unexpected… tell me” he turned quickly to stone “How was this configured?”
Stone took this as a good sign, the doctor was curious about him. And judging by the way he took another sip of the latte, the doctor approved. Blood rushed back to his cheeks as he tried to hold back a smile,
“Well, I was able to quickly deduce that Austrian goat milk would not be available in any local stores, and buying it online was a no-go considering the time limit I was given. So I accessed the local Facebook group that resides around here and found a farmer that had a female goat of Austrian origin. The rancher informed me that goat's milk was not for commercial sale due to the limited source he carried. I was able to receive a deal by sharing a story of my poor 12-year-old daughter, Fatima, suffering from Hemophilia and goat milk was a well-known remedy to assist in blood diseases-”
“You have a daughter named Fatima?” the doctor interrupted raising a brow.
“No sir,” Stone says with a smile.
The doctor grins mischievously and takes another sip of the latte, signifying a desire to resume Stones' tale.
“I was able to receive a small bottle of pasteurized Austrian goat milk, leaving me to gather expresso and the necessary automation to create the latte. I located a local coffee shop and decided it was best I create the latte myself to ensure your directions would be followed precisely. Waiting around the employees-only entrance, I was able to catch a new trainee that day. I made a mutual conversation before introducing myself as someone in the HR department, and that there was something wrong with the processing of his employment, and that we required an extra day to properly implement him into the system. Being roughly about 16 years old and it being his first job, he obliged and I received his ID tag with no further questions. I quickly ran to make my shift on time and began training as a barista. While it took a few orders before I was taught how to steam milk and configure lattes- which I got quite a few compliments on- I managed to fit your order within the busy late-morning rush. The second the orders started to die down, I created an excuse that my grandmother had just fallen down the stairs, allowing for my frantic nature to have some faulty context. Which eventually led me to come back here, and deliver your order, sir.”
Robotnik’s mustache molded to an amused smirk,
“Quite impressive work, agent. Though I do have to be honest with you, you were not meant to pass this first task. Truthfully, I had no idea if I even liked Austrian goat's milk. All I knew was that I would be able to identify the fat content of the lac or the subtle nutty flavor of an almond alternative. However… I am not disappointed by your delicious triumph.”
He tossed the empty cup aside, Stone had not even realized he had finished the beverage.
“And now I am filled with the needed energy required of me to function throughout the rest of the day and to assist my every electrified thought and action. Thank you-” the doctor paused and looked at his name tag, “ Chris Thorndyke….”
Stone paused for a second but looked down quickly and chuckled nervously, “Oh-sorry sir, this isn't mine. You can call me Stone.”
Robotnik shifted his head back with a dramatic smirk,
“Just Stone?” He asked in a pestering tone,” No last name? First name? Suffix?”
“No sir- Just Stone, agent Stone.”
“Your parents must have been very passionate geologists,” he laughed at his own joke.
Stone's infectious smile seemed to dwindle,
“I wouldn't know, Sir.”
There was a slight shift in Robotnik's caliber. Stone noted he must have poked his way through the doctor's exterior.
“Orphan?” he asked, his tone still carrying it like a statement, and yet it was more sympathetic than Stone expected.
“ Yes, and you, doctor?”
“Most assuredly,” His nose twitched with a sniff, “perhaps that is why you performed so well today my little coffee bean, you know discipline, you know how cold and cruel this world truly can be. You know of loneliness and pain, and the cold hands that are offered to you only to be taken away,” He started to get a little too close- it was clear the doctor didn't have personal space,” you stopped trying to fit in with this dull crowd, for no one wanted you anyway, not even your own parents. So you turn to machinery and find control and endless possibilities, something humanity could never give you,” he was so close Stone could smell the goat's milk within his breath,” and that, my friend, is exactly the kind of hireling I need.” He pulled away quickly, allowing Stone to finally exhale in relief.
“This is no one-time ordeal, Stone, situations and tasks like these will litter your timeline to the point it may become unbearable. I hope you have prepared for what you have signed up for.” Stone's heart swelled if only the doctor knew how important those words were. How much purpose it finally gave to him. He would stay on board, he would serve the doctor, and he could continue to analyze and ponder the genius of Robotnik. There was no turning back from here, he was at the top, and he intended to never look down again.
“ I will assist you in any way I can, sir,” he couldn't help but smile.
Robotnik turned and offered a wide grin,
“Let's hope you never have to eat those words.”