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It was the twenty-third of December and the wet forest floor underneath Henry's feet squelched with every step he made. There were many places he'd rather be right now than in the woods his family had owned for centuries now. Had everything been frozen over, covered by a thin layer of snow, their little trip would have at least been picturesque. As it was, it was only wet. Wet and cold and grey.
At least it was not raining.
The memories of last year's icy torrents made Henry shudder. He gripped the handle of his hacksaw more firmly, well aware that by the end of the day he'd be painfully reminded of muscles he hadn't even known to exist before. „I can't believe he's still making us do this.“
Next to him, his brother merely shrugged. „Be glad he considers himself too old to join us for this honoured family tradition.“
„Thank god, indeed. The only thing worse than freezing my buns off would be him watching as I do. Though,“ he added, after a moment, „I do feel sorry for Eleanor and Catherine. I hate that we had to leave them with him.“
„Eh, at least they have it warm and dry. They'll survive.“
There was no more sympathy to be garnered from Frederick and as the finality of his tone had made it clear that it was all he had to add to the discussion, all that was left for Henry was to jest some more, before they both continued in silence, interrupted only by the occasional banter, looking for a fir fit to serve as this year's Christmas tree.
Tall, but not too tall, straight, well grown, with a proper tip and full, even branches, they were looking for nothing short of perfection. But with their father, as they well knew, anything less simply would not do.
Finally, having wandered the familiar forest for nearly an hour, Frederick stopped at one of the trees. Taller than Frederick and uniformly bushy, without a single bald spot, crowned by a distinct, singular tip it would've been the highlight of many a family's living room and thus could probably be considered to be good enough for the Tilneys'. Barely. „How about this one?“
Henry seemed unconvinced. „It does lean a bit to the left, doesn't it?“ He tilted his head slightly. „Yes, it definitely is slightly lopsided.“
„Eh, it's straighter than I, the old man can deal with it.“ Saying so, Frederick was already on the ground, looking for the best spot to start cutting. „Or do you feel like trudging through these woods for two more hours? Because I don't and isn't there a girlfriend waiting for you back home?“
„Actually, about that –“
„Oh, fuck no. Don't tell me you mean to propose to her on Christmas Day or some bullshit like that. First, I'm not Ellie, I don't care about your love life, so spare me, and second, that'd be a new low even for you. You couldn't get more tacky if you tried.“
Laughing, Henry shook his head. Rude as he was, Frederick knew how to diffuse the tension. Or make things worse, had this truly been Henry's intention, but then, he guessed, had Frederick offended him that would've killed the awkwardness of the moment as well. „Awww, but aren't you my big brother? Shouldn't I come to you with all my woes and sorrows, to receive your wise counsel?“ He hopped to the side to dodge the thump Frederick was about to give him, still grinning as he followed his brother's unspoken prompt and got down on the ground, ready to start sawing. Soon enough, he knew, the cold would creep through the several layers of his clothes and it would be for the best to get it done quickly. „But no, I don't actually have any plans in that regard. Though now that you mention it...“
„As if. You wouldn't have the balls, not with the old man around.“ The hint of a smirk on his face, Frederick motioned for Henry to start cutting. „Also, Catherine deserves better.“
That much was true, and Henry said so, trying his best to not be drowned out by the sound of metal grinding through wood.
As much as he loved Catherine, and as much as he could see himself growing old by her side, if he were to put that question in front of her, and he meant to, soon enough, it would be as far away from his father as possible. Perhaps he'd ask her on a cruise. Catherine had mentioned her wish to go on one, though he knew she hadn't meant it as a suggestion.
Still, that train of thought, while it kept him warm, was something he didn't mean to share with Frederick. Not that his brother would want that knowledge. And so he simply worked in silence, only interrupted by the occasional, snarky comment made by Frederick and Henry's equally quick-witted replies. He had not forgotten the subject he had meant to address, but after the first deflection, courage had left him. Exchanging jabs and quips with his brother was much easier than discussing more serious topics.
But then, this likely would be the best opportunity for such a discussion they'd have in a long time, and so, when the tree finally fell, Henry tried again: „Frederick, what I wanted to talk to you about before... So, you and Catherine's brother?“
Frederick lifted the tree up with a grunt. „What about it?“
„Nothing, just – It's been going on for a while now. And from what one hears, it sounds almost like something serious. A proper relationship even,“ catching his brother's glance, Henry grinned. Then, unable to resist the temptation, he quickly stuck out his tongue. „Oh come on, unlike you James actually talks to his siblings. And from what I've been hearing, albeit secondhand, well, colour me surprised. I didn't expect something lasting. You aren't usually –“
„I'm not what?“ The words came out sharply, Frederick's tone much harsher than Henry had expected. Almost defensive. „But before your curiosity kills you – Yes, I'm still seeing James and I have no plans on changing that any time soon. In fact, you aren't the only Tilney invited to spend Boxing Day at the Morlands'!“
If anything, these last words had been even more biting than the first and Frederick wore a scowl to match.
Keeping his own expression blank, not showing his surprise at this reaction, Henry weighed his next words carefully. „But you didn't feel like asking him to join us here?“
„Why do you even care?“
„Why indeed, I'm asking this myself more often than and so far, it remains a mystery. But Eleanor felt worried that you might –“ he sighed and gestured vaguely, at an uncharacteristic lack for words. „She, no, we are afraid you didn't feel... Oh, damn it, I don't know. Just accept that we're worried, okay? We know that this isn't easy.“
A few seconds passed by with neither brother saying a word, the only audible sound the sound of the tree being dragged over the ground. Then, more peaceable than before but not yet at ease, Frederick replied: „Thanks, I guess. There's no need for it though. I just didn't want to inflict this family on him yet. Wouldn't trust him to get drunk enough to actually endure this.“
„Yet? So this is serious? You're really planning on bringing James Morland to our family Christmas next year?“
„Fuck you Henry. You know, two hundred years ago, you would've been glad to find me too gay to marry and reproduce. Would've left you all the richer.“
In spite of the insult, it was enough to make Henry chuckle and he replied in kind: „Oh, but I would've hated to see you hang. And actually, come to think of it, chances are, two hundred years ago, I'd ended up the primary heir anyway, what, with your whoring around, I guess you would've caught Syphilis and died just as childless, only more slowly and in more pain.“
„While you would've ended up with a dozen mouths to feed.“
By now they were both laughing. „True enough. Praised be the twenty-first century. Especially the invention of the modern condom.“
„Making life much more enjoyable since – Eh, who cares. Now, help me get the tree up there, will you?“
They had reached the car, the way back, as always, a lot quicker and now it was time to secure the tree on the roof. As every year it would be a rather haphazard affair and, as every year, Henry wondered why they didn't just buy a trailer. But that would be far too easy and so the two brothers hefted the tree up to the roof, before Frederick tried to open the boot to get to the ratchet straps.
„You know, Frederick, that would've been easier before we put the tree up there.“
„Smartarse. Now move it to the other side of the car, I'm not going to strap that thing down all by myself.“
Pleased with himself, grinning smugly, Henry complied and together, it didn't take them long to secure the tree. And, as Henry couldn't help but observe out loud, this time without even scratching the car, the teasing well worth the withering look it earned him.
With the tree found, felled and safely strapped to the roof, there was nothing left for them to do in the forest other than growing even colder and wetter, and so, after having changed from their safety boots into more comfortable, and cleaner, footwear, they both got into the car. There, as soon as the motor was running, Henry immediately turned on the heating. Content, he leaned back with a happy sigh.
Soon they would be, if not truly home, though at least at a place that claimed the title for itself. And for once, knowing that Catherine was waiting for him, Henry hardly minded it. Smiling to himself, the seat heating doing its job, he wouldn't have minded dozing off, when suddenly, Frederick softly spoke up again, his voice more gentle than Henry was used to. „And to answer your question, yes. Next year, if nothing happens in the meantime, I fully intend to bring James Morland to this sham of a family gathering we call Christmas, if he really wants to, and I don't give a fuck what any of you think about this.“
Henry's smile grew, but he knew better than to open his eyes again and face his brother. Instead he simply said: „Great. He can do the sawing, then.“