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For sixteen years – well, less than that, considering she was a baby for a while and had no idea of what was going on in the world around her, but that’s just semantics – Caroline had watched as her father tried to find the one who would love him for who he was, no ifs and buts; who would accept her in his life without questioning and conditions; who would give her father the happy ending and happily ever after he dreamed about so much and was so deserving of it. She also watched as her father grew quite resentful of it, and decided that he wasn’t deserving of such things, that it was too much to ask for a guy to give him everything he wanted – like he had the highest demands of it all. Basically, deep down, he just wanted a nice, decent guy who wouldn’t be spooked by the fact that at some point in his past, before he figured himself out or was brave enough to accept himself, he slept with a woman, got her pregnant, and did the decent thing of raising the kid he helped to bring into the world.
Maybe Caroline was a bit biased on this, but she was sure that if there was anyone who was deserving of a love right out of a romance book, it was her father. He loved and cared about people so deeply, with his entire being. He trusted people, he threw himself headfirst no matter how many times his heart got broken and bruised. Watching him accept his fate and stop looking for the love he dreamed so much of living and having was painful. Caroline would watch as he confined himself at home, not bothering to go out and meet new people anymore, to try.
What pained her as well was the fact that the longer it took for her father to find a good, decent guy, the longer it would take for her to have the family she always dreamed of.
She barely felt the loss of her mom when it happened, being only two years old when the accident happened. Her entire life, all the family she knew was her dad, her auntie and uncle. There were some cousins here and there, but they’d only see each other on special occasions, and when Caroline wasn’t spending time with her dad. She never really missed her mom, with her auntie always providing some comfort and telling stories about her sister whenever Caroline asked for it. That didn’t mean she didn’t crave a good, well-established family like she would see on movies and TV shows, like the ones she’d read in books, or the ones she’d meet through her friends from school. She loved her father, and he was enough, but part of her always wished for more.
And then, it happened .
One day, something changed.
She could still remember, after almost three years, the day her dad took her out for breakfast and there was something different in the way he was walking, the way he was smiling. It wasn’t the Caroline smile , as she got used to see and call, it was something else, something that she hadn’t seen in a very long time. He even whistled on the way down to the coffee shop they used to go to whenever he would take her out. It had been so long since the last time Caroline heard her dad whistle or sing along to the song playing on the radio.
Not that he wasn’t happy before, no, he was very content and satisfied with his life, with his daughter, the choices he made. But that day was something else. That was the day everything changed, and Caroline felt the spark of hope in her chest lighting up again.
It didn’t take long for him to tell her what had happened, and although Caroline was worried about her dad flying into a hurricane and landing on a capsized cruise ship , she couldn’t help but put all of that to the side and hear him gushing about the cute firefighter who was introduced to him by his longtime friend Howie. It was the only time she heard her dad calling Evan , by his nickname, as he was narrating the way the guy introduced himself. From then on, Caroline just referred to him as Buck , in respect to his preference, although, from the looks of it, Buck didn’t seem to mind being called Evan by her father – which she found extra cute.
All of her life, Caroline couldn’t remember a moment her dad was that excited, feeling so good about something. She still remembered the day he came to tell her that he had kissed Buck, how excited he was about the date, how she helped him pick up what they would do. She remembered her dad getting home earlier than expected that night, quite bummed after Buck acted weird when they met a common friend.
“Maybe he was nervous,” Caroline said it, trying to defend Buck as much as she could. It was the first time she saw her dad that happy, she would do everything she could to make it work, even if she had to personally stalk this Buck guy.
“He was, obviously he was…”
“So, why are you so upset?” She asked, looking at him. They were at his place because she wanted to know all the details first thing in the morning, having no idea that he would join her for movies and ice cream so early in the night. “He admitted to being his first time… Maybe he’s not out yet to everybody.”
“Clearly… It’s just…” Tommy shoved a spoonful of ice cream into his mouth and stared at the TV in front of them, not really looking, as he worked on the dessert.
“You created expectations,” Caroline concluded for him and her dad looked at her, nodding.
“I didn’t wanna pressure him, so I left… Was this a dick movie?” Caroline carved some more ice cream for her as she pondered over the answer. Her dad was hurt already, did she want to hurt him more? Was honesty the best answer here?
“Maybe? I’d guess he had expectations too, and maybe you hurt him a bit just leaving him standing outside the restaurant.”
“That’s an image I didn’t need to be reminded of,” Tommy sighed, leaning his head back, resting on the sofa. “God, he looked so disappointed. What if I messed up?”
“Give him some time,” Caroline advised, not sure if that was the right answer. “Who knows, maybe he’ll come around.”
She was so glad when, a couple of days later, Buck reached out and asked to meet her dad for coffee. And even more so when her dad told her about the wedding invitation. She knew their fate was sealed when her dad told her about the kiss in the hospital emergency room. Coincidently, she was watching an episode of Friends, one of her favorites, and pointed at the screen at the exact moment the quote came up.
“He’s your lobster,” she whispered to her dad, who hugged her tight and laughed lightly.
Ever since then, it was pure bliss. Sure, there was the rocky moment when Buck learned about her existence, but never once did he reject her. He was confused and a little hurt by how long it took her dad to tell him the truth, but the moment Buck met Caroline, he embraced her and welcomed her into his world, into his family, his life. And the rest of his family and the 118 followed his lead – Buckley parents not included.
Right now, she stands on the greenest patch of grass ever in wobbly heels, taking a small tissue paper to her eyes to dry the tears as she watches her dad see his soon-to-be husband for the first time in his suit and tie. She can’t point out who has the biggest smile as Tommy and Buck turn around and face each other. They both look gorgeous in their suits, and their smiles just compliment the look. The photographer has their job cut out for them, the grooms willing to do everything that is asked of them, and it’s not hard to look at each other with literal heart-eyes .
Silly as they are, and choosing to have a damn Christmas wedding, they both have little Santa hats coming out of their pockets, and Caroline has a small snowman clipping for their ties – their something new for the ceremony.
As they finish their photo session for the time being, the photographer turns their attention to Caroline, motioning for her to approach them, and she does, cursing once again their decision to have an outside wedding and her own insistence on wearing high heels – her dad had said she could wear converse sneakers or something, but she wanted to dress nicely for them.
“You two look so gorgeous,” she lets them know once she’s close enough. Her dad has teary eyes, and Buck is not that far. Caroline shows them the little snowmen and they both laugh. “Something new.” She explains as she clips them little things to their ties.
“This is awesome,” Buck lets her know, even though they all agree that the snowmen are the most ridiculous thing they’ve all ever seen. “Thank you, sweetheart.”
“Only thing missing is the something borrowed,” Tommy tells them and Caroline smiles.
“Well, maybe I could borrow your daughter so she can walk me down the aisle?” Buck suggests, half joking, but half serious as well, after long consideration, he had decided to simply not invite his parents, especially considering they never once apologized for their behavior last Christmas, and apparently didn’t reach out to Buck ever since.
“Ey! I thought I was your daughter as well, or was just for show last year for your parents?” Caroline asks, crossing her arms and arching her eyebrow. Tommy stifles a laugh.
“Well, I… Hm… I don’t… Wanna help me here?” Buck looks at his soon-to-be husband.
“Not really.”
“Unless you want something more official? Like some signed paper saying you’re adopting me and becoming my dad?” Caroline asks, taking the piece of paper out of the pocket of her dress – yes, her dress has pockets!
“You… Wh-What?” Buck’s eyes open wide in surprise as she hands him the adoption papers. It’s quite silly, giving she’s eighteen already, but she still liked the idea of having him as her other parent, being able to list him as emergency contact and add a little “dad/father” after his name.
“I’m not calling Margaret ‘grandma’, though,” she adds for good measure. “But, yes, I mean it… Could be kind of like your Christmas gift to me, you know, adopting me, giving me another dad.” Buck is full-on crying now, reading the papers and staring from Caroline to Tommy, who just shrugs as if to say it’s up to him and he’s cool with that.
“Believe me, kiddo, this is a gift to me ,” Buck tells her, pulling her into a tight embrace. “I love you, Caroline, thank you.”
“Thank you for not running away or kicking me out when I invaded your house two years ago,” she tells him, muffling her laughter on his shoulder. “I love you too, dad .”
“God!” Buck sobs on her hair, but she feels him smiling as he lets a kiss on the top of her head.
“Come on, let’s get you two married, and then open Christmas presents!” She tells them both, stepping away so they can clean up and take a couple of family photos before joining the rest for the ceremony. “Who gets married on Christmas Eve?” Caroline mutters as she’s smushed between her two dads for the picture.