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Despite her actions often pointing to the contrary, Sunshine Benedict was actually quite in control of her emotions. She was only so bubbly and excitable all the time because she wanted to be. After years of grief she was finally in a place where smiling came naturally, even if she didn't feel like it on the inside. All the time spent struggling to find joy again was worth it whenever she got somebody to smile genuinely back at her, especially her new teammates.
Luckily, as a member of the Justice League International, she was at no loss for yuks-a-plenty.
She didn’t mean to be so derisive about her job it was just…
Alright. So what if Sunny had hoped she’d be a part of the Real Justice League™ and not... whatever it was Maxwell Lord had going on in New York? Sue her! If you saw how things ran in that nut house, you’d wish you were hanging out with Superman instead, too.
Despite that, Sunny was truly happy. She had a chance to use her powers to help people, even if almost every situation the JLI got involved with turned into a circus. And the team wasn’t bad at all once she got to know them. Beatriz was cool and fun and Tora was exceptionally sweet. Booster and Beetle were a laugh-a-minute, if you could stand to be around them that long. She found Mister Miracle to be nice, if a little high strung, and Oberon was probably the only person there with a solid head on his shoulders. Batman, on the exceedingly rare occasions that he dropped by and wasn’t losing his mind at Beetle, Booster, Guy, Max, or any combination of the above, was perfectly civil with her. She did not like Guy Gardner, but who did?
But then there was their fearless leader. J’onn. Sunny couldn’t get a read on him at all.
Maybe it wasn’t intentional. That might’ve just been how Martians were, all stoic and unflappable (even if she had seen him become “flapped” once or twice by the antics of her teammates.)
It felt awkward. She didn’t want him to see her as just another one of the children he had to babysit. And she swore she had never seen him smile before, not even when Beetle accidentally dyed his face blue with semi-permanent hair dye instead of face paint. Sunny decided to keep him at arm's length, confining their interactions to polite, professional small talk. She couldn’t bother someone she rarely talked to. Still, she was curious about him.
Thoughts about her teammates floated around her head as she quietly padded down the stairs and to the kitchen. It was 1:00 AM and she didn’t want to wake anyone with her noise, but she had post-bullshit-mission-gone-awry anxiety and needed to soothe her soul with a little baking therapy.
Unfortunately, it seemed she had been beaten to it. Soft light filtered out into the room beyond the kitchen and Sunny realized she was not alone. That, or someone had left the light on by accident and they were all going to get a grilling in the morning about the electricity bill. Again.
The sound of a cupboard being shut rang out. Good. She really didn’t feel like hearing from a millionaire about how expensive lights were. Maybe the mystery raider wouldn’t stay long and she could have the room to herself afterwards. It couldn’t hurt to check.
Just as she rounded the archway leading into the kitchen she was suddenly struck in the face by what felt like a warm brick wall and her eyes screwed shut in pain. She grasped at her newly throbbing nose and stuck her unoccupied limb out blindly for stability. Her waving arm was grabbed by a firm hand with another quickly gripping her shoulder.
“I’m so sorry Sunny, I didn’t hear you coming. Are you okay?”
She looked up blearily and was met with J’onn’s furrowed brow and immediately felt an embarrassed flush crawl up her neck. So much for being professional.
“Yeah I’m fine!” She winced at how loud her voice came out. He didn’t seem to notice, instead tilting his head in concern.
“Your nose is bleeding. Let’s get you a paper towel.” J’onn tilted her chin back gently and guided her to a chair inside the kitchen. Sunny could feel her credibility slipping away. She laughed nervously.
“Sorry. I didn’t think anyone else would be awake. I was going to make scones…” She trailed off as J’onn handed her the damp cloth.
“Ah, so you’re our mystery baker? I was wondering where all the pastries were coming from. They were too good to have been bought by Max, knowing how cheap he is.”
That time her laugh came out sounding all nasally. It was not turning out to be her finest showing. She really hoped J’onn would leave so she could be embarrassed in peace. Instead, he pulled a sleeve of Oreo's out from his cape (it had pockets?) and placed it on the table. Sunny looked at him in confusion.
“An apology.” He said, as if that explained anything.
“I see…do you often carry Oreo's with you?”
“You never know when the need might arise.”
Oh, so the Martian had jokes, did he? Sunny couldn’t help it: a bright smile broke out across her face as she continued to bleed into the towel. The corners of J’onn’s mouth quirked up at the sight and Sunny wondered if maybe he had smiled at her before, and she just wasn’t paying attention.
Well, she was paying attention now.
“Hm. Correct me if I’m wrong, but we don't speak very often, do we?” He sat down and pulled a cookie out of the sleeve. Sunny glanced away guiltily.
“No we don’t…but it’s my fault. You uh, you intimidate me, to be completely honest.” Her smile turned awkward.
“I do?” He tilted his head in that cute way he had done earlier.
She dropped the paper towel onto the table. “Yeah, totally. I’d hate to be on the receiving end of your anger. Especially when you get annoyed, like with the boys.”
“You don’t annoy me, Sunny.” He said, kindly.
The way he said her name…she cleared the thought away with a cough. “It’s fine, I know I can be a little much sometimes. A little too much.”
J’onn shook his head decisively. “Not at all. You’re wonderful.”
His frank manner of speaking, as if it was a simple fact, made Sunny’s head spin with pleasure.
“Like a ray of sunshine?” She cracked.
J’onn laughed, low and quiet. “You are aptly named.”
“I’m never gonna get those scones made if you keep flattering me all night.”
“Please, don’t let me stop you from your baking. I can flatter you just fine over here.”
What a tease! Sunny suddenly couldn't think of any good reason why she was so worried about him. She started pulling bowls down from the cabinets as they chatted. “What were you down here for anyways? I couldn’t sleep after today’s…whatever you want to call it. Disaster, I guess.”
He hummed sympathetically. “I was only here to get my Oreo's.”
“If I’d known you had a sweet tooth earlier I’d’ve made cookies every time I couldn’t sleep instead of scones.”
“I notice we have scones quite a bit…do you often find it hard to fall asleep?”
Sunny was taken aback. It was a simple observation, one anyone could have made, but she was abruptly hit with a bubble of shame. She wanted to be seen as the fun and bubbly girl, not the one who never slept because her dreams were too sad.
“Oh it’s just insomnia I guess.” she shrugged one shoulder as she mixed, in what she hoped was a casual gesture.
“I see. I may be able to assist you with that, but I fear you might find the suggestion a bit…intimate.”
Her face flushed furiously and she tried to play it cool. “Oh?”
“If you’re comfortable I could go into your mind and calm your thoughts.” Sunny watched as he purposefully avoided her gaze and she wondered if he would have given the same offer to anybody on the team, or just her.
She slipped the scones into the oven and closed the door with her hip, thinking about the proposition. It was awkward but she really needed to sleep. “Um…okay. Yeah, that might be worth giving a shot. If you’re okay with it?”
“I would not have offered it if I did not want to do it.” He smiled kindly and gestured for her to sit down.
“So, how does this work? Is it like what Spock does in Star Trek?”
“...The Vulcan mind meld? I suppose it is a little similar…” He looked uncomfortable at the comparison and Sunny grimaced.
“Sorry.”
He waved a dismissive hand. “Just sit there and focus on what troubles you. I will do the rest.”
“Okay.” She leaned forward and closed her eyes. J’onn’s hands gently rested on her face and she could feel his breath just beyond her eyelids. Intimate indeed.
---
Sunny really didn’t like dwelling on what happened with her parents. She preferred her memories of them to be ones of joy and love from her childhood, not their terrible final moments. She would much rather think about the farm, fluffy chickens and warm, fresh eggs. Still, J’onn asked her to bring the troubles into focus, so she forced herself to recall the day they died.
The Farmer’s Market. Eclipso. The sudden dark that fell over the sky. Her parents, limp before they even knew what happened; and Sunny, standing above them in disbelief. If she had known, if she had acted fast enough…
But the memories faded gently away before she could spiral down that familiar road. A wave of calm washed over her and she let out a deep sigh. It was the first time since that day she was able to have her eyes closed but not see their deaths. Whatever J’onn had done, it worked wonders.
After a few moments of peaceful silence, J’onn let her go.
Sunny blinked her eyes open and saw him looking at her with concern for the second time that night. He was so close and his hands were still on her face.
“How do you feel?” He asked softly.
“Good. Great. And exhausted…”
“I hope you find sleeping easier tonight.” He rubbed a soothing thumb over her cheekbone and she shuddered out a breath. She was about to respond when the oven dinged, signalling that her scones were finished. “Ah…I think that is fate’s way of telling us to go to bed.”
She couldn’t help the pang of disappointment that sprung up in her chest. Damned oven! “Yes, I guess so. But thank you, J’onn, really.”
J’onn smiled tenderly at her and stood up. “Goodnight, Sunny. Sleep well.”
Sunny sighed as he walked away. The scones could rest on the baking rack until morning. All she wanted to do at that moment was fall into her duvet and sleep for eight solid hours. As she tiptoed back up to her room, she felt none of the residual anxiety from that day’s problems nor any of the old grief lingering around the edges of her mind. It was as if she had never worried about anything at all.
Sunny slipped into her bed and sighed deeply, but as she drifted off she did not think of chickens or eggs like she thought she would. Instead, she thought of soft hands and rare smiles; intimate offerings given just to her.