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Chapter Text

Lance

12:01 AM, Christmas Morning

“It’s a little hard to get belligerently drunk when you look so sad.”

Lance looked up from the beer bottle he was constantly turning in his hands to see three concerned faces watching him. There was no hint of the usual teasing glint in his sisters’ eyes and Frankie looked a little unsure whether to leave to give them some private McClain time or stay.

The bar was in full swing, a kaleidoscope of ugly Christmas sweaters, cocktail attire, or pajamas. At this point, Lance would normally be on a table singing. Now, he just felt a little lost. 

“Are you serious?”

Lance could still hear Keith’s voice ringing in his ears, the fractured sound to his words. 

Veronica touched his arm gently. “What happened?” 

They had been impressively patient, not saying a word when Lance trudged to the car by himself and said Keith wouldn’t be joining them.

You still can’t look me in the eyes and tell me that your feelings towards Christmas have changed?”

“I fucked up,” Lance said miserably. “I–I don’t know, I freaked out.” 

“You are seriously asking me if I’m going to work for you tomorrow?”

Even Lance wasn’t sure what he was thinking. He didn’t know how his feelings got so hurt so fast. It didn’t feel like it all came from the silly bet, it all felt too big for that. Lance supposed that was why it imploded. All that had happened that month spiraled from a stupid arrangement that Keith agreed to, sure that it was impossible. 

“Was this just all because of the fucking bet?”

“I guess I thought it would be that easy,” Lance said quietly. “If I could get him to enjoy himself at all, then that meant he liked Christmas. That meant I did it. I–”

Fixed him. 

“I’m not something for you to fix, alright?”

Lance groaned. “I fucked up.”

Rachel rubbed his back sympathetically. “Lance, you were trying to help.”

“Was I?” Lance asked desperately. “This all started because I wanted a shift covered and I was certain that I could change seventeen years of pain with just a couple Christmas cookies and snowmen.” 

“Then I will have lost seventeen Christmases that I can never get back. I will have wasted every December since I was five years old. I can’t do that, Lance, I can’t.”

“And to make matters worse,” Lance’s eyes burned. 

“After skipping this bar crawl with your sisters, I will have broken all the rules.”

Veronica’s brows drew together in concern. “What?” 

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

Lance could feel something churning in his stomach. He could still feel the startled blush that rose on his face when he realized what Keith meant. Lance still could hardly believe it, couldn’t process the fact that after everything, all the fight Keith had with him, he still cared that much about Lance. 

“It’s just another shitty Christmas,” he whispered with a sad smile. “It’s probably better for me, than the alternative.” 

“Nothing,” Lance’s throat felt full of nails. “Don’t worry about it.”

6:10 AM

After a few fitful hours of sleep, Lance woke up to a knee in his groin. 

“Uncle Ants, wake up!” Sophie bellowed. “It’s Christmas?”

“Is it?” Lance groaned sleepily. “I thought we skipped it.”

“What?” 

“Yeah,” Lance yawned as he sat up. “Santa woke me up and asked me if this was the right house but I told him that we were actually all set on gifts.”

Sophie was stunned speechless with horror, dropping to her knees on the bed.

“What?” She repeated, her voice a whisper.

“I’m afraid so,” Lance nodded sadly. “But then he said that there were two little twins here that were so high on the nice list he just had to make sure you got all your gifts.”

Sophie let out an excited shriek and vaulted over him, dashing down the hall. Lance let out an exhausted chuckle and tugged on his sweater. His childhood bed should have felt cramped, but without Keith, it seemed a little too big. 

As he left his room, Cam was tugging a worse-for-wear Veronica out of her room. 

She grimaced. “There is a serious disadvantage to this rule.”

When Lance was little, the McClain family had a rule that everyone had to be awake before you could open presents. While this was intended to let everyone make their way downstairs at their own pace, it turned into a mad dash to get all the adults up and moving.

As they reached the living room, Lance took a steaming mug of coffee from his mother with a smile. 

“Merry Christmas,” she kissed his cheek.

“Merry Christmas,” he said, trying to keep his smile on his face.

Sophie and Cam were jumping excitedly around the presents swarming the Christmas tree, a mess of brightly colored wrapping paper. Rachel was laughing but reminding them to be polite and say thank you after each one.

As the twins started to tear into their gifts, Lance settled on the couch next to his father. 

“Merry Christmas, son,” he said kindly, rubbing his shoulder.

“Thanks Dad,” Lance sipped his coffee.

They watched Sophie screech in delight as she pulled out a Barbie from the box with surprising strength. Cam, ever the careful one, slowly pulled off his wrapping paper in one piece and slid tiny fingers down the toy dinosaur in awe.

“Thank you!” They chorused before moving to the next one.

 The adults laughed as Rachel and Frankie gave them a big thumbs up. 

“This never gets old,” his father mused.

Lance watched his father as he fondly watched Sophie and Cam open their gifts. 

“You know,” Lance’s father said after a moment. “I didn’t really like Christmas growing up.” 

Lance perked in interest. “Really?”

“Really,” his father nodded. “It wasn’t a huge holiday in my house. I thought all the red and green nonsense was too much and the music was grating. When I started dating your mother, I remember wondering how I would stand all her Christmas cheer.”

Lance looked down at the worn knees of his pajamas pants. His father clasped his shoulder gently.

“It takes time,” he said gently. “But I’ve started to enjoy it as well. Maybe not as much as your mother, but enough. I look forward to this moment the most.”

He nodded towards the growing pile of wrapping paper, the twins grinning and Veronica already prying out a toy car out of the box for Cam. 

“Is there, uh, a reason that this little anecdote came to mind?”

Lance’s father smiled innocently. “Just thought of it. Randomly.”

“Mmhmm.”

His father chuckled and ruffled his hair. “It takes time. That’s all.”

As his father stood to refill his mug, Sophie bounded over with a plastic sheet of so many articles of Barbie clothing. Lance smiled at her and reached for the pliers ready on the coffee table. 

9:26 AM 

“Do I go to work?” Lance asked quietly.

Rachel paused sprinkling sugar over the stack of pancakes to think it over.

“If he said he’ll take the shift, then no.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,” she said instantly. “Because I doubt he wants to argue with you about it anymore.”

Lance could see the other reason in between her words. He probably didn’t want to see Lance either.

Lance sighed as he arranged the fruit in the bowl. Rachel nudged his hip with hers. 

“Chin up. It’s Christmas.”

Lance smiled hollowly.

It was. And he had made out well with some new shifts, a nice razor, a handful of gift cards, baking tools, and a mini vacuum cleaner he was way too excited about. 

But every moment it got too quiet then he was thinking about the broken look on Keith’s face and the overwhelming certainty that he had to make it right.

“How am I going to fix this, Rach?” Lance sighed as they carried the food to the dining table.

Rachel offered him an encouraging smile. “You will. Just maybe not today.”

2:12 PM

After a long and heavy brunch, they all disbanded into other rooms to take a nap. Lance tried to sleep, but his dreams were scattered, tangled messes. Shattering into each other as a collage of Keith. Memories of him frowning, talking, smiling, laughing. The feeling of how he felt, the strength in his arms, the cut of his jaw.

Lance blinked himself awake and checked the time.

Keith would probably be driving to work now. Lance wondered how his Christmas had been. Had he spent it with Shiro and Adam, did he open presents, or did he tuck himself away from all of it. 

Thinking about Keith made his chest too heavy and he rolled onto his side in attempts to lift some of the pressure.

It didn’t help much and he dreamed of Keith again.

4:59 PM

The knocking on the door continued until Lance opened the door. 

Pidge was standing outside his childhood home with a very angry look on their face.

“Hey,” Lance attempted. “Merry Christmas.”

“What the hell happened?”

Lance let out a breath between his teeth, stepping out onto the porch and closing the door behind him. “Pidge–”

“Don’t Pidge me,” they snapped. “I thought you knew to be careful with him. What the hell, Lance?”

“I know, I-I fucked up,” Lance shoved his hands hard in his pockets. “I had forgotten about the bet but when I remembered it just felt so obvious that I had done it, I had made him love Christmas because he seemed to have fun and want to spend time doing stupid holiday things and–”

“You fucking idiot,” Pidge said. “He doesn’t love Christmas, he loves you .”

A knot rose in Lance’s throat. It was the first time someone had said it out loud.

“I know.”

“And I know that’s going to be surprising to you and you will probably freak out and– wait,” Pidge blinked up at him. “You know?”

“Yeah,” Lance exhaled. “He told me, well, in so many words.”

Pidge gaped at him. “Well, then why the fuck did I pass him on his way to clock in at the store?”

“You saw him?” Lance perked up instantly. “How did he look?”

Pidge leveled a cold look his way. “Well I saw him and now I’m here. Guess.”

Lance’s stomach dropped a little further.

“Look,” Pidge sighed, rubbing their forehead. “You need to separate Christmas from this. Because that’s a lost cause right now. You can’t flip a switch in twenty-five days. And he knew that. That’s why he agreed to the bet.” 

Lance involuntarily scowled. 

“Don’t give me that look,” Pidge said firmly. “Because I bet you knew that too.”

Lance’s face cleared from confusion. “What?”

“I think you knew Keith had a lot of things to unpack,” Pidge said simply. “And you wanted to help because, despite your occasional epic blunders, you have a big heart and you use it often.”

“Pidge, I–”

“No, because you are going to love this next part,” Pidge leaned against the porch railing. “I think you wanted to help him and you made this stupid bet because you wanted an excuse to hang out with him.”

Lance stared at them cluelessly. “But, why would I–”

“Oh, please ,” Pidge let out a loud groan, tugging at the ends of their scarf in frustration. “Don’t do this to me. Keith nearly killed me with his cluelessness as well. You two have been into each other from the beginning. You didn’t need to take him ice skating and introduce him to your friend and buy him holiday drinks.”

Pidge studied Lance almost with pity.

“You didn’t introduce him to Christmas,” they said softly. “You brought him into yours .”

Lance didn’t know what to say. Pidge seemed satisfied by that, taking a step back. 

“So, uh,” they waved their hands quickly. “Speed up with the making up, will you?”

“How would I make up with him?” Lance asked bitterly. “Just tell him, hey, I know that you are a real-life tragic hero that is doing his best and gallantly organizing donations to make better Christmases and–”

Lance choked on his own words because that was it.

That was it.

5:23 PM

Lance threw his car into park, nearly skidding in the snow in front of Shiro and Adam’s house. Shiro paused from where he was bent over the trunk of his car, filling it with things for the block even that night.

“Hey,” Lance said, out of breath as he jogged towards him. “Listen, I know you probably hate me right now, but–”

“Spot on,” Shiro said coldly, turning to his trunk. 

“But,” Lance panted. “I need your help.”

Shiro shot him a hard look. “Lance, I don’t like helping people who hurt my little brother. It’s a hard thing to do, so you should be proud of yourself for managing it.”

“Shiro,” Adam walked towards the car with a box. “Hear the kid out.”

Shiro frowned harder.

“Please,” Lance begged. “I care about him a lot, I really do, you know I do.”

Shiro held his gaze for a moment.

“I just messed up for a second,” Lance pleaded. “Just one blink where I combined Christmas with whatever makes us us . But I know now I can’t do that, I see where I hurt him. And I’m trying to fix it.”

Adam joined Lance’s side, looking meaningfully at his partner.

Shiro looked between the two of them and sighed heavily. 

Keith 

12:01, Christmas Morning 

After the door slammed shut behind Lance, Keith didn’t move for a minute.

He stood there, holding his breath, preserving the moment maybe so he could change it. Maybe it could just blink away, drift off like a drift.

But time passed and life went on and Keith let out a low breath. He was trembling, off-balanced, twisted around in a sick satisfaction that he was right. He was right. 

Just another shitty Christmas.

With anger that felt almost unbearable, Keith turned to the tree tucked in the corner.

The Christmas tree that put stars in Lance’s eyes when he saw it, that seemed to piece together everything for the two of them, also watched them fall apart.

Keith took one breath, then another, then one more tumbled out like a sob and he marched to the tree.

He yanked the plug out of the socket, the tree going dark, an immeasurable void of black in a much darker room, and felt himself break. 

With a strangled gasp, he ripped the top from its stand, dividing the tree into its three parts and kicking the stand petals apart. He flung the bottom into the dark living room, willing to deal with it in the morning, just not wanting to see it right now . The middle followed and he threw the top and that’s when he heard the sound of thin glass breaking.

The sound stuck in his lungs, causing him to freeze.

His blood pounding in his ears, he crept towards the dark living room. On the ground, glimmering from the lamplight, shards of a sparkly white ornament laid at his feet.

He remembered receiving it, the weight of it in his palm as he carefully tucked it into his pocket, the smile on Lance’s face when he accepted it.

Eyes burning, Keith knelt. His throat tightened as he carefully gathered the pieces of the ornament.

“Fuck,” he whispered. 

He sat back against the wall, closing his eyes. 

The reminder of the argument still burned in the back of his throat, the icy dread when Lance asked who won the bet, the betrayal when he pushed it.

Keith knew he could have done better talking to him, explaining how he felt. But he was tired and scared and, as usual, exploded rather than trying to figure it out. 

Keith chewed hard on his lip before reaching for his phone. 

Shiro picked up on the first ring. 

“Keith?”

“Hi,” Keith’s voice was wobbling more than he would have liked. “Merry Christmas.”

There was a pause on Shiro’s side. “Are you alright?”

Keith swallowed. “Can I come over?”

***

Keith brushed past a concerned brother and brother-in-law as he entered their house. He could feel their eyes on him as he marched down the hallway towards the guest room.

“Thanks for having me,” he said quickly, for he had to move quickly because the second he slowed down he thought he would start crying. “I’m sorry to wake you.”

“We were up,” Shiro said gently. “Keith, what happened?”

Keith’s eyes stung.

“I have to work tomorrow,” he said instead. “I broke the rules of the bet, so I’m taking Lance’s shift.”

“Keith,” Adam said softly. “There must be more–”

“Just one more thing,” Keith said thickly, emotion building in his throat as he walked into the guest room. “I was an idiot and fell in love with him.”

With that, he closed the door sharply behind him. 

6:10 AM

The bed next to Keith dipped, stirring him awake.

Keith rolled onto his back, rubbing sleeping out of his eyes as Shiro settled in next to him. 

“Good morning,” Shiro whispered.

“Is it?”

Shiro hummed, winding his arm back behind his head. “I think so. We are alive and together. Adam is making coffee with this weird peppermint syrup he found. You have a couple presents under the tree to unwrap, even though you threatened me with bodily harm if I got you them.”

Keith could see his brother looking at him.

“Sometimes we have to find pleasure in the little things.”

Keith rolled his eyes. “If you woke me up at the asscrack of dawn to lecture me–”

“Hey,” Shiro said gently. “I’m on your side. Lance shouldn’t have come at you like that. He had unrealistic expectations of you and came across as a jerk. I don’t like how he treated you last night.”

Keith ground his teeth together. “But?”

Shiro chuckled. “But, do you really think he lost the bet?”

Keith snapped his teeth. “The idea of Christmas still makes me irrationally angry. I can’t bear the sight of Christmas trees and hate having to keep the secret of Santa Claus because it all feels a little pointless. I don’t like crowds and shopping for presents and I’m just bad at it, okay? I’m bad at all of it.”

“Are you sure?” Shiro asked kindly. “Because if you were bad at it, I don’t think Lance would have insisted on doing it all with you.”

Keith pressed his lips together.

“You can’t bear the sight of Christmas trees, but did the McClain’s have one?”

Keith glared at the ceiling.

“You waited in line for Santa, you shopped for the donations, you braved the crowds–”

“What’s your point?” Keith asked hotly.

“My point is that, yes,” Shiro said patiently. “The idea of Christmas makes you angry. It is painful and hurts. But maybe actual Christmas doesn’t.”

Keith frowned in confusion. “I don’t understand.”

Shiro sidled closer to him. “Your idea of Christmas is what you’ve lost. Real Christmas trees with a mother and a father and a boatload of presents from Santa. You never had that, so you feel like you are missing something. And I don’t blame you, you’ve had a lot of shitty Christmases. I’d hate the idea of it too.”

He smiled at him.

“My Christmas is spending the morning with my husband and adopted brother before going and working a block party,” Shiro said. “I’m gay with one arm and the gifts I asked for are mostly stupid shit that I know my husband loves wrapping. That’s about as far as it can get from whatever concept I had of Christmas as a kid.”

He tapped Keith gently on the shoulder.

“Last year, I couldn’t get you to eat a candy cane. But look at all the things you’ve done this year.”

Keith sighed and Shiro smiled wider, knowing he was beginning to convince him.

“I think you can learn to love your own kind of Christmas,” Shiro said softly. “And if there’s anyone that can teach you how to do that, it’s Lance.” 

9:26 AM

“I saw it!” Adam crowed. “I definitely saw a smile!”

Keith glared at Adam, though nothing could stop his lips from twitching. “Shut up.”

Adam leaned into Shiro, laughing loudly as Keith tentatively pulled out the stuffed hippopotamus. He frowned at the weight of it. 

“Whoa, this is–”

“It’s a weighted hippo,” Shiro grinned toothily. “For all your relaxing needs. It smells like lavender.”

Keith stared at them, holding the hippo as if it would bite him. “This is ridiculous.”

“Shut up and try it.”

Tentatively, Keith pulled the weighted plush to his chest. He laid back on their carpet, rearranging the hippo on his chest. A comforting waft of lavender reached his nose. 

“Is it helping your anxiety?” Adam called.

“I’ll never tell.”

Keith couldn’t help a smile as they laughed.

The collection of presents underneath the tree had been small, but special. Shiro had bought Adam a set of vintage classic books. Adam bought Shiro a NERF gun and new wireless headphones. 

“This is nice,” Keith said, closing his eyes.

“Whenever you get all prickly, we can just tell you to get your hippo,” Shiro said. 

Keith laughed. 

“You know, I don’t know if I’ve ever heard you laugh on Christmas,” Adam teased.

Keith’s smile fell slightly, as he realized that Adam may have been right. 

2:12 PM

“Hey loser.”

Keith turned from where he was unlocking his car to see Pidge walking to him dressed in a gaudy, bright red Christmas sweater, and holding a gift bag.

“Hi Pidge.”

“I’m sad I won’t be able to break and enter your car to smuggle you your gift this year,” they said. “But I’ll survive. Here, I know you don’t like presents so I’ll tell you, it’s a label maker. I don’t know, that seems like something you would like.” 

Keith grinned. “Thanks, Pidge.”

He leaned into his car and plucked a small wrapped present from the console. 

“Here.”

Pidge blinked, shocked as they took the package. “For me?”

“Y-yeah,” Keith felt his face go warm. “It’s nothing, it’s just a–”

Pidge was already viciously ripping it open. They let out an excited gasp. 

“A hard drive?” Pidge looked up at him in surprise. “Keith, these are pricey.”

Keith shrugged, growing uncomfortable. “Well, Lance mentioned that one of yours was acting up and, I don’t know, I owe you at least five gifts by now.”

“Thank you, Keith,” Pidge beamed at him. “Though I suppose I should thank Lance as well. I’ll swing by Castleship later and–”

“Oh, uh, I’m working his shift.”

Pidge’s smile turned devious. “Oh? So he won?”

Keith wished he would never hear about the bet ever again. “No, I mean, not technically, I–”

He faltered as Pidge’s evil grin turned into something open and concerned.

“I messed it up,” he said quickly instead. “No surprises there.”

“What happened?”

Keith held out his hands desperately. “He wanted me to tell him I loved Christmas and I couldn’t do that. End of story.”

Pidge lowered their hand holding the hard drive. “Keith–”

“Hey, Merry Christmas,” Keith stepped towards his car. “I’ve got to get going.” 

Pidge studied him for a moment longer before moving out of the way. “Alright. I’ll see you later, alright?” 

“Yeah, sure,” Keith gave them what he hoped was a convincing smile before turning away.

6:24 PM

The block event was, to Keith’s reluctance, a success.

Business was booming. All of the stores had stalls out in the main pavilion, displaying new arrivals or freshly baked goods. Keith could smell Shay’s fresh muffins from their stall and had half a mind to duck by to grab one.

Allura had made their stall a winter wonderland, the cheap, wooden stall now glittering with white paint and draped with light blue tulle. Keith appreciated the lean towards winter rather than Christmas and wondered how intentional it was considering the wink Allura sent his way when he arrived.

It had been a busy afternoon so far. Allura and Keith had been greeting people almost nonstop while Coran constantly refreshed their displays when they sold a product.

Keith wasn’t going at keeping track of finances, but he could tell by the length of Allura’s smile that this was a very good sales day for them. She was checking her watch or phone constantly, likely keeping track of the time to consider their average rate of sales. 

After the fifth rush, Keith leaned against the side of the stall with a sigh. He was exhausted, already drained from his fight with Lance the night before. 

“I must say,” Allura said. “I was expecting Lance.”

“Please,” Keith huffed, looking out over the crowd. “You knew he would get his way.”

“He knows how to twist things to work for him, he’s clever like that,” Allura agreed. “At least, unless it’s with you.”

Keith let out a laugh of disbelief. “You’re joking. I’ve been wrapped around his finger since he started working here.”

Allura laughed. “Oh, please. You know it’s the other way around.”

Keith looked at her in confusion. “What?”

Allura surveyed the crowd, smiling lightly. “In my seven years of being a business owner, do you know what I’ve never seen?”

“What?”

“Someone willingly taking a 5 AM inventory shift,” Allura’s eyes slid to him. “Until Lance was trying to get you to Elf Night.”

Keith’s lips parted. “That’s why I could go?”

Allura nodded, eyes sparkling. “It was Lance. He’s always hovering around you, trying to see what to do to help you.”

“I don’t need to be helped all the time.”

“You don’t,” Allura nodded. “But doesn’t it feel awfully nice sometimes?”

8:32 PM

They had only a little longer at the event, and Keith was counting down the minutes.

His head was pounding from the loud chatter of shoppers and Christmas music was causing his teeth to throb and he just really wanted to go home.

The sting from last night had settled into a dull ache and he was tired and getting vaguely close to grumpy and wouldn’t be the ideal customer service attendee soon.

“Keith!” Allura called over the stall counter. “Why don’t you go and get us some of Shay’s coffee? My treat!”

Keith was grateful for the excuse to stretch his legs. He walked through the crowd, studying the families as they milled through the market. He wondered what their Christmases were like, where did they fall in this “idea” he had of it.

He looked up at the night sky. Was Shiro right? Was he just hating something he would never have?

“Excuse me.”

A tiny voice caused Keith to look down to see a little girl standing in front of him, peering up at him with big, curious eyes. She was dressed in a green dress with pigtails, wearing a glittery headache with a Christmas tree on it. 

“Are you Keith?”

“Uh, yeah,” Keith looked around. “Where’s your mom?”

“She’s just over there!” She said cheerfully, pointing out a woman watching them with a big smile. “I’m Lizzie. I just wanted to say thank you!”

With that, she lifted something towards him. It was an ornament, green and sparkly enough to make Keith think she had picked it out herself. 

“Is this for me?”

“Yup!” Lizzie said happily before handing it to him. “Merry Christmas!”

With that, she darted through the crowd back to her mom. Her mom smiled and waved at Keith. Despite being certain they had confused him with something, he waved back.

He started walking again, before a little boy ran up to him.

“Mr. Keith?” At Keith’s nod, he grinned, revealing two missing front teeth. “I’m Alex. Thanks!”

He handed Keith a tiny soccer ball ornament.

“Wait, uh–”

But the boy skittered off with a wave.

Now even more confused, Keith only took a couple of steps when two girls ran over to him. 

“Thank you!” They chorused, handing him matching bright pink ballerina ornaments.

“Thank you, I don’t–”

Before he could ask, he received two more ornaments, a shiny red orb and one that looked like a hockey stick from boys that looked so shy he didn’t want to pressure them with questions.

Three more and Keith was keeping track of them on his fingers, too stunned to even ask questions.

He was closer to Shay’s stall, wondering if she could give him a bag, when a girl about his height slipped in front of him. She had to be in middle school, wearing jeans a little too short for her and chewing gum with an unimpressed look on her face.

“Hi, I’m Sara,” she said, handing him a plastic snowflake. “Thanks. You clearly know your stuff.”

“Thanks–wait,” Keith blinked. “Sara?”

A slow nod.

“How old are you?”

“Thirteen.”

Realization dawned and Keith nearly dropped the ornaments. “You– you go to the community center.”

“Yeah?” Now she looked confused. “We all do. We were told you’re the one to thank for our presents. Though I told the little ones that you are just helping Santa. Sorry to not give you full credit.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Keith was grinning so hard it hurt. “Keeping the Santa magic is more important.”

“Yeah,” she smiled ever so slightly. “I think it is.”

She offered him a half smile before stepping away. Keith paused to look down at his handful of ornaments in awe. He carefully slipped them into his apron, thankful for the numerous pockets.  

“Mr. Keith?”

A little boy grinned up at him. Keith smiled back. 

“Hi, what’s your name?”

Five kids rushed him, excitedly telling him about their gifts and what they were going to do with them. 

Michael handed him one shaped like a race car.

“Whoa,” Keith studied it attentively. “This is awesome. Where did you get this?”

“There’s a stall down there selling them,” Michael pointed. “And he said that you wouldn’t take gifts, but you couldn’t say no to an ornament.”

Keith’s heart skipped. “Really?”

Michael nodded just as a girl poked over his shoulder, brandishing an ornament shaped like a donut. 

The kids scampered away and Keith watched them go with a smile.

He had almost forgotten about Shay’s stall until he saw how close he was to it. He blinked, shocked to see most of his friends there.

Shiro and Adam’s stall were next to Shay’s, sharing a coffee bar that they would split the revenue from. Hunk was standing there, looking a little weepy, and Pidge was grinning madly.

They bounded up with a canvas bag and Keith let out a laugh of relief. He pulled out the ornaments from his pockets, gently placing them in the bottom of the bag.

“I guess you knew this was happening?”

“Maybe,” Pidge smiled. “Turn around.”

Keith turned around to see maybe the cutest kid he had ever seen blinking up at him. He was blonde with the biggest blue eyes and clutching a teddy bear that Keith had picked out just days before.

Keith knelt in front of the boy. “You must be Andrew.”

He smiled shyly.

“I’m sorry about your first bear,” Keith said gently. “I hope this one is good, too.”

Andrew nodded quickly.

“I’m glad,” Keith grinned. “Did you have a good Christmas?”

Andrew shrugged. “I guess.”

“You guess?” Keith chuckled.

Andrew shrugged again. “I would do it again.”

Keith laughed. “That’s a good way to think about it. I think I’d do mine again as well.”

Andrew handed him an ornament the shape of a teddy bear. 

“Thank you,” Keith slid his thumb gently over the grooves of the glass.

“Merry Christmas!” Andrew said, as a woman with several kids behind her walked up.

“Merry Christmas, Andrew,” Keith waved as Andrew ran to his foster mother.

Keith watched for a moment, wondering what the group home was like. Was it cruel? Unfeeling? Cold? But before Keith could go too far, could drown himself in old, bitter thoughts, he stared hard at the teddy bear and remembered that Andrew had something to hold onto.

He looked down at his own teddy bear. As he rose to his feet, spinning around to finally get the coffee, he noticed there was a small note on the back of the tag.

You may have lost seventeen Christmases. But you gave eighty-three.

Air rushed into Keith’s lungs. He stared at the message, reading it over and over. Staring at it even after his vision blurred, reminding himself of the words over and over.

He helped give eighty-three kids better Christmases than he had. 

It felt surreal to even comprehend it. 

Keith looked up.    

Lance was standing with his friends. His cheeks and nose were flushed from the cold, seemingly out of breath. But he smiled and held up a large plastic canister. It was filled with ornaments, some colorful, some sparkling, some matte, some weirdly shaped or random. 

Keith didn’t need to count them.

He knew that they were the remaining fifty-six ornaments. A way to show him how many Christmases he had changed. 

Lance held his gaze, a thousand words in his expression. I’m sorry, I screwed up, I know better now, please, listen.

Their friends shifted behind Lance, excitement fading into hopeful nervousness.

Shiro caught Keith’s eye, encouraging and supportive.

Keith tilted his head, sliding his gaze back to Lance.

“Careful,” he said. “Now, they definitely think we are hooking up.”

Lance placed the ornaments on the stall counter, turning to walk to Keith in large, determined steps.

“Let them,” he said, eyes searing and focused as he cupped Keith’s face and pulled him into a kiss.

This kiss wasn’t as desperate as the one the night before. This was focused and careful, hesitant as it branched into something new.

Keith felt something inside him crack open, heat spilling over and flooding his veins. 

Lance was soft and warm and tasted like Christmas and Keith thought maybe he could learn to like the taste of it. 

Maybe he had already begun to. 

10:54 PM

“Looks great.”

Lance harrumphed from where he straightened Keith’s tree, now reattached. 

Keith grinned, tucking his legs under him as he watched Lance carefully straighten the branches. He had taken the sight of it torn apart on the floor surprisingly well. 

Lance had promised to be patient. To take it slowly. Keith had promised to stay honest, to communicate. They were both learning how to love new things.

With a triumphant sigh, Lance flopped back on the bed next to Keith.

They both watched the tree and its eighty-three ornaments, give or take a few.

“It’s a shame you’ll have to take it down so soon,” Lance said. 

“Nah,” Keith stretched his legs, leaning into Lance. “I think I’ll have a new Christmas tradition where I keep it up.”

“Oh, I like it,” Lance wrapped an arm around Keith, pulling him close. “How long do you think?”

“I guess it depends how Kosmo handles it but,” Keith thought it over, “Valentine’s Day?”

Lance let out a surprised laugh. “You’ll have a Christmas tree up for that long?”

“Sure,” Keith shrugged. “In an hour it’ll be a Boxing Day Tree. Then a New Years Tree. Then a Valentine’s Day Tree.”

Keith looked up to see Lance grinning at him.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Lance’s smile only got wider. “Have I mentioned you are adorable?”

Keith rolled his eyes but accepted the kiss on his cheek. 

He settled into Lance, enjoying the long line of warmth against his side. 

He wondered if he would have ever expected to be here, tucked together with someone while watching the lights twinkle on a Christmas tree. It had felt impossible, unattainable. Until now. Until Lance. 

Keith may have still been a little unsure regarding his feelings for Christmas, but he then found himself a little thankful for Christmas miracles.