Chapter Text
CHAPTER 3: ANYONE BUT HER
Her eyes flutter shut a bit as her screen lit up, big bright numbers reflect in her light grey eyes, as she rolls them. How is it 10pm and there are still people not sleeping? She continues crawling up the stairs of the her building; desperately wanting to go lay down. Her head felt like it was only a few seconds away from exploding.
She walks past the noisy bodies, not bothering to hide her annoyance as she approached her dorm room and as she stood before the door, turning the door knob, it just would not budge. She lets her body fall against the door, a soft groan leaving her mouth, the only thing her tired body could muster, as she remembers she'd left her key yet again.
Vi bangs her head against the door heavily before she groans again, then she turns her back to the door, sliding down against it. Her head seemed to be punishing her for her stupid act as a striking pain hits her and she curls into herself, groaning.
Where the hell is she?
Vi wonders, but not for long before her eyes start getting heavier and heavier and the air got colder. Maybe throwing her jacket away wasn't the brightest idea.
At some point, she dosed off. She's not sure for how long but not long enough as her phone rings, startling her out of her sleep. Her face contorts in anguish as she lifts her hands to hold her head, and a groan leaves her lips at the pulsing pain in her head. It was way stronger than before; felt like her head was about to fall all the way off. She sighs, sitting up with her eyes closed as she pulls her phone out of her pocket. She doesn't think twice before she answers, putting the phone to her ear and her head bobs to the side, making her shift in discomfort.
"Hello..." Her tired voice came, and she starts falling asleep again until the familiar voice rings through the line.
"I'd ask if you're okay, but by the sound of your voice I'd say I've got my answer." she sits up, staring down at the phone screen and she swears under her breath when she reads his name. She really needs to start checking who it is before she answers her calls.
"I told you to leave me alone" She starts, finally letting her eyes flutter shut, struggling to stay open as she waits for the older man's response.
"I remember, and I will but... Mylo told me you started Piltover University. Said you didn't want me to know." Vi sighs, and rests her head on her knees again.
He shouldn't know.
"Aren't you gonna say anything?"
"I don't think I should..." She scoffs, hugging herself tighter as her throat grows tight again but that doesn't stop her from speaking; and maybe she should have. "Every time I... open my mouth I end up... fucking everything up. And when I try to do anything I end up... fucking things up too... I... I just fuck everything up, Vander and I... I-" She lets out, and her voice cracks a little at the last 'everything' before, internally, she tells herself to shut up . Vi's eyes fall shut yet again, as she waits for a response and for a second she thinks to hang up.
"I always told you, you're way too impulsive for your own good." He tells, a soft chuckle leaving his lips and she huffs, pulling her legs closer to her chest. "I know you won't believe me now, maybe you never will, but that's not true. You do before you think, and maybe that's not always a good thing but it's always driven by your love for the people you care about and that's something I don't ever want you to stop doing, do you hear me?" Vander goes quiet, waiting for Vi's response, it takes a while before he gets one.
"It's impossible not to... You never did work on that inside voice of yours." Vi torments and Vander chuckles, softly,- like he'd missed this and she did too. Far more than he'd probably ever know- which unironically pulls a smile from Vi, but it fades almost as quickly as it appeared.
"I'm serious, okay?"
"I wanna get back to sleep, Vander" She deflects, and Vander scoffs. He can't say he's surprised that she was being avoidant, but he knows when to stop. A soft sigh sounds from his side of the line and the creak of a chair follows, along with clothes shuffling.
"If that's what you need, Vi. I'll leave you alone." He tells, then he goes quiet, hand hovering over the red button longer than it needs to, waiting just to see if there would be any objection, even just a small murmur of rebuttal from her but when seconds goes by and there's nothing but background chatter, Vander lets his thumb fall onto the button, a beep following.
Vi lets her phone slip from her grip, it probably cracked a little more than it had already been but she didn't seem to care. Her hand wrap a bit tighter around her head and she grips at her hair when her thoughts start getting too loud and she doesn't bother reacting to the pain. It's nothing compared to the thoughts.
They. never. stop.
Why did he have to call?
She bites the inside of her mouth yet again, teeth sinking beneath the flesh immediately and the familiar liquid she's quite used to now, swarms her mouth. She just wants it to stop. All these feelings. The guilt. The crippling guilt of everything.
"Forgot your keys again?" A bothered, posh voice she could recognize anywhere pipes up and she sighs before she pulls herself and her phone up off the ground, and she sends a chilling glare over at Caitlyn. For a second they just stare at each other, before Caitlyn looks away, a grin on her face.
"So what? Are we gonna do this every single day?"
"Can you just shut up and maybe open the goddamn door?" Vi snaps, and Caitlyn rolls her eyes. Vi folds her arms, leaning her aching head against the wall for some support. She just needed some sleep, not whatever pointless conversation this was undoubtably going to be.
"See this isn't how this works, you don't get to forget your keys and then demand that I open the door. If you want me to open it, maybe try being respectful."
"Oh, you're finished? thought for sure you'd throw your favorite little phrase in there." Vi slurs, and Caitlyn could smell the alcohol on her breath. She rolls her eyes; not even wanting to get into that. The University had a strict policy against drinking on campus but when has Vi ever been a stand-out at following the rules?
"What are you talking about?" Caitlyn questions, then she pulls her keys from her pocket, once it hangs on her index finger, she leans against the door, her smug grin still very apparent. She dangles the key around, knowing it would piss Vi off even more. Vi finally pries her eyes open with an exasperated sigh and she glances at Caitlyn briefly.
"I think you know what I'm talking about but I have no time to entertain you nor your lunacy, so if you could just open the door and dead this conversation in it's tracks, then we can both enjoy the rest of whatever's left of the night. What'd you say?" She tries again, but Caitlyn keeps her eyes focused on her dangling keys, before she scoffs.
"Typical Vi, bring shit up then deflect like a motherfucker." Vi chuckles lightly, Caitlyn swearing was not something she had on her bingo card, but who was she to complain.
"Thought little miss Poshy Poshy would never get caught dead swearing."
"Yeah, well never thought I'd see you all up in your feelings like this but here we are." Vi scoffs, defensively turning away from the taller before she lets her arms drop to her side.
"I... I don't know what you're talking about.." Caitlyn chuckles, watching the other and she turns a little more to face her, key still dangling around her finger. Between the keys clashing against each other and Caitlyn's constant nagging in her ear, she's not sure which is more annoying.
"Happened like 5 minutes ago, maybe even longer, you were just sitting on the floor like a kicked puppy, don't know who you were talking to but whatever they said messed you up real bad, huh?" There's a level of amusement in her voice, like it pleases her that she caught Vi in such vulnerable state and it hurt.
"Fuck you." She spits after she turns to face Caitlyn, a death glare that pulled Caitlyn's smile away immediately and she doesn't say anything when Vi grabs the key from her hand, pushing her away from the door, and even then it's gentle, barely even a push. Oddly enough, it angers Caitlyn, but it's directed at herself more than anyone else, because why does she pick up on such small details? Why does she let it affect her so much?
Vi opens the door then she steps inside the room, tossing the key onto Caitlyn's bed, then she makes her way over to her own bed, where she plops herself down face first. She sighs in content, maybe she could sleep off this shitty day but her headache was getting more aggressive by the minute.
Caitlyn stands at the door, partly because she's not sure what she's feeling. It's more than hurt, more than hatred. She's holding grudges even though she knows it's wrong, but isn't it justified?
Even though she'd like to lie and say yes, she knows better. She wishes she didn't.
Caitlyn shakes her head before she makes her way into the room, and she shuts the door behind her then her eyes find Vi. She's just laying on her bed, rocking back and forth, something she used to do back then too. She still remembers everything, and that's the hardest part. She's been harsh to Vi since the moment they laid eyes on each other; more so than she needed to be, but in all honesty, a part of her just wanted to see Vi break. Only because Vi deserves it and Vi deserves to hurt and Caitlyn hates the way she doesn't believe any of that at all but it didn't stop her from trying.
Caitlyn drops her bag at the feet of her bed, before she walks over to the window, pulling the curtains closed. She then takes a seat on her bed, facing away from Vi.
Looking past all the obvious nonchalance and insolence that Vi most often presents, there's always more there. At least, if you care to see it now. Back then, you'd never have to search too far to find it, at her core Vi was a lover. Now she just seemed so beaten down and Caitlyn was curious to know why. Desperate for any basic understanding of what was going through the other's head; as she's always been.
Should I even try?
It feels like an itch, and she's been ignoring it for so long. Caitlyn glances behind her, and she noticed that Vi had now shifted onto her back, her left hand plopped over her eyes, most likely to block out the light, and her left leg raised into a triangle. She still shakes back and forth, searching for comfort as she dosed off.
"I know you and I... aren't best friends or even friends, but you can-
"Talk to you?" Vi laughs, and Caitlyn looks down to her feet, regretting even trying. What did she expect out of doing that? "Yeah, I'll pass." It hurts, it's, again, a reminder that this is always how it's gonna be with Vi.
She never trusts me
"Of course, when I try to extend an olive branch you've gotta shoot it down. Aren't you tired of the constant arguing?" Caitlyn lets out, still facing away from Vi but she could tell the other was looking at her, and Caitlyn keeps her head towards the curtains on her side, she's not sure she could handle seeing another one of those death glares targeted at her.
"Oh, you mean the "constant arguing" that you always start? and for the life of me, please be honest, Caitlyn. It's not a fucking olive branch. You just want me to tell you shit so you can use it against me someway, somehow." Caitlyn blinks twice, faltering a little. She didn't even know where to begin to answer.
She always assumed the worst of me too.
"Why would I ever do that?" She questions, deliberately ignoring the first part of Vi's response.
"Because you're a bitch." She says so plainly, like it meant nothing, like that's exactly how it is and it puts a band-aid over Caitlyn's hurt feelings, one marked with anger.
"I'm a bitch, but you're not?" She laughs desperately, standing up before walking over to stand between her and Vi's bed
"Yeah, sure but, I mean I'm not the one who's constantly singling you out, am I?" Vi challenges and she moves her arm up letting it fall off her face and above her before her eyes flutter open, focusing on Caitlyn, who shakes her head, folding her arm.
"And what's that suppose to mean?"
"I'm getting really fucking tired of you pretending you don't understand what I mean." Vi raises her voice, as she sits up, pushing herself up off the bed. All she takes is three steps and now she was all up in Caitlyn's face. Her glare never falters once. No one knew how to get her as riled up as Caitlyn could. Now and then.
Caitlyn takes a step back, losing all that seemingly dominant and fearless aura she'd just had and she struggles to keep eye contact. She's too close, and now she can't speak with the conviction she'd like to, instead her voice come out all shaky.
"I'm not pretending, you're just not making sense." Caitlyn mutters, still avoiding eye contact.
"How's this for making sense, "someone like you", "someone like you"" She raises her voice, in a terrible attempt at mimicking Caitlyn's accent. One that Caitlyn didn't appreciate. "Does that make sense for you?" Vi finishes, her expression similar to that of earlier when she'd said again. It did hurt her.
That's what Caitlyn'd intended but part of her honestly didn't think it would affect the younger nearly half as much as it seems to. Then again, it was always really one of those things that always seemed to tick her off.
"I... That...." Caitlyn tries to play defense, and Vi raises an eyebrow waiting for an explanation but Caitlyn only gulps and when she tries to turn away, Vi doesn't let her.
"No, continue, I'm listening. How exactly are you gonna bullshit your ass out of this one?" Vi pokes and Caitlyn pulls her arm out of Vi's grip. She makes her way over to her bed, where she sits, arms crossed over her chest. She felt small beneath Vi's gaze and that makes her mad. Mad because how dare she show up all of a sudden and try to play the victim.
Caitlyn scoffs at herself before she takes a step forward, and she speaks, not bothering to filter herself.
"You wanna get mad about that? Since when do you ever get your feelings hurt? Aren't you the one always going around acting like your heart's as tough as stones. 5 years ago, something as silly as that you'd never even bat an eye at... unless, you were just putting up a fucking front then. Or just straight up lying? Like that's the only freaking thing you know how to do. Like when you said you'd always be there and then left like that... like.... like you weren't leaving anything behind. " Her lips quiver as she struggled to maintain eye contact, and she doesn't even bother to turn away when she feels her eyes getting teary. There's no point, she wants to address the elephant in the room. She wants to know why. The truth couldn't possibly hurt more than having Vi around and not knowing how she just left like that.
"Oh, is that it?" Vi pauses, and she scoffs before she places her hands above her hips shaking her head in disbelief. " You're still mad? What? Did it hurt your feelings that someone like me got as far away from you as I could?" And apparently the truth can hurt more than not knowing and the tightlipped smile on Vi's lips tells her everything she needs to know.
She just didn't want me around anymore.
And Caitlyn just says anything she can that could hurt Vi even just 5% of the way she feels in this moment.
"Fuck you. The best thing you ever did was leave and honestly, I think you should've stayed gone." The smile's gone, but Caitlyn knows better. She's not hurt. Like her of all people had any feeling for anyone or anything for that matter.
She's acting
She tells herself, so that when she watches Vi's hurt-filled eyes search her face, she doesn't have to feel bad, but Vi's tone was clearly not an act.
"Mmh, noted." She mumbles, before she turns on her heels and Caitlyn watches her walk out the door and she flinches slightly, eyes falling shut as the door is slammed closed. Caitlyn sighs as tears pool into her eyes again, then she sinks to the floor, closing her eyes and her tears finally fall.
Why couldn't she get another roommate? Anyone but her.
------
Time flies, but only when you have nothing significant waiting for; only when it's the last thing on your mind but Caitlyn can't stop switching her phone on and off every few minutes, biting her nails in a way her mom hated.
Where is she?
She thinks to herself for maybe the 100th time, she's honestly lost count. It's been hours. So many long hours and since that door slammed shut, it hasn't been opened again.
Caitlyn took a shower, tried forgetting her little cry session then she studied for a bit but her mind wouldn't stop running on Vi and now she can't close her eyes to sleep because she needs to make sure she's alright. That she didn't get hurt because then it'd be all her fault. Of course, that's the only reason. She drove her out and she wouldn't know what to do with herself if something happened to the younger because of her.
Caitlyn sweeps a few strands of hair out of her face as she lowers her head to turn her phone on. The bright light illuminates her in the dark room as she stared at the white lit numbers. 5:19am. Caitlyn groans, letting her face fall onto her knees as she shakes her head. She can't stop thinking the worst. At first she was somewhat alright. She was somehow able to delude herself into thinking that she didn't care that Vi was out, probably all alone and possibly in the cold but it eventually got too much for her to pretend and here she is a freaking mess on her bed.
She can imagine the way Vi would laugh at her if she ever found out about this. It's been so long since she's heard her laugh too. It's crazy how it used to change her mood no matter how low or high. It was her favorite sound.
I still remember it
----
"Cait" A soft voice comes, she can't place it.
"Cait!" The voice comes again, more stern and previous darkness starts to fade before the same voice calls again.
"Caitlyn! Wake up!" Her eyes flutter open, meeting Maddie's immediately and her breathing picks up before she looks away and around the lecture room. It's empty.
But... class just started.
Caitlyn thinks as she continues looking around, then she turns back to Maddie, who smiled down at her.
"You slept all through class." Maddie tells and Caitlyn groans, lowering her head to fall into the palms of her hands. "Our professor was not very happy about it, but I, for one, didn't mind having you all up on me" She teases, as she continues packing her things away and Caitlyn sighs, sitting up.
"My mom's gonna kill me." Caitlyn starts, rubbing her tired eyes while she leans deeper into the chair.
"Don't worry, I wouldn't let her." Maddie starts, stretching a hand out for Caitlyn to take and once she does, Maddie pulls her up from the chair. "Now, I have another class and I kinda want my girlfriend to walk me there." She says, with an eager smile and Caitlyn can't help but smile back.
"I can barely stand, but you're lucky I like making you happy." Maddie smiles, tightening her grip on Caitlyn's hand, then they start making their way out of the lecture room.
----
"I'll see you tomorrow." Caitlyn whispers as she closes the gap between her and the smaller's lips, and she smiles as she pulls away first.
"Or maybe you could see me tonight?" She questions, staring up at Caitlyn with telling eyes.
"I don't know, I just... I have... to study some more." Caitlyn smiles, flustered and flattered, but she hadn't even gotten to study as well as she'd wanted to last night. As much as she'd like to have Maddie keep her company, she'd have to make up for all those lost hours of studying tonight.
"School just started, Cait. Now's the time for you to live your life to the fullest, studying can wait." Maddie argues, but it does little to change Caitlyn's mind.
"I will... soon."... She promises, and Maddie sighs with a smile at the other.
"You're too stubborn, you know that? " She says, standing on her tiptoes as she snaked her hands around Caitlyn's neck, pulling her down for another kiss. Caitlyn pulls away smiling down at the other before Maddie unhooks her hand from her neck.
"I'll text you after my class ends, okay?" Maddie tells, stepping back while Caitlyn nods with a soft smile, as she also starts stepping back, a bad idea as she bumps into someone behind her, almost falling over.
"Hey, watch it." The guy calls, glaring at Caitlyn as he walked away and she whispers a small apology before she turns awkwardly to Maddie, who laughs and shakes her head before she turns on her heels, and opens the door of her lecture room then she steps inside; the door falls shut behind her.
Caitlyn sighs, feeling embarrassed but she pulls herself together. She makes her way back to her dorm, seeing as she had no other classes until the next day. To be frank, the main reason was so eager to get back there was so she could check if Vi had gotten back, maybe some time after she'd left. She even made sure to leave with the door open, since Caitlyn's more than sure that Vi hadn't taken her key last night.
The closer she got to the dorm, the more the pit in her stomach grew because what if Vi actually hadn't come back. What would she do then? She releases a breath as she stops before their dorm, then she wraps her arm around the doorknob, turning it.
It doesn't budge.
She tries again, and just like before it doesn't budge.
She lets out a sigh of relief. She was certain she'd left the door open, and seeing as Vi was the only other person who had a key for the dorm, she had to have been the one to close it. While that gives her some amount of solace, she still wanted to see the other.
Caitlyn huffs as she leans back against the door, and she wraps her arms around herself. She should go get something to eat and then study, like she wants to but she knew that if she didn't sort all her feelings out with Vi then she would get nowhere in her studies. The only problem is Vi is as stubborn as she's gorgeous. Chances are, even if Caitlyn did manage to find her, if Vi didn't want to talk to her then she wouldn't.
Can't hurt to try, can it?
She knew all too well that it could.
----
Caitlyn decided that she'd get lunch, the campus was far too big for her to just wander off in search of Vi, it'd take her hours and there was no telling that she would even find Vi, wherever she was. Besides, this is a great opportunity to make friends. The type of friends she's seen in those movies her mom always loved, she wants something like what Jayce has with Viktor.
She stands just before the door of the cafeteria, taking a deep breath.
You're no different than any of them. You're not weird. You're not a misfit.
She reminds herself, and she smiles before she opens her eyes and she pushes the door open. She gulps instinctively as she takes in all the people before her. They're are rows and columns of desks, all of them filled with students laughing, talking, eating and then the rest are just staring at her. She's frozen, it feels just like high school. So foreign to her and despite every inch of her wanting to just turn around and run to her room, she doesn't.
Caitlyn heads straight to the lengthy line of the cafeteria, trying not to embarrass herself in the process.
She wraps her arms around her frame, barely knowing what to do with her eyes. There's a shorter girl before her, green hair, caught in tiny pigtails and topped with various trinkets. It's cute, Caitlyn would absolutely like to try those. Maybe they'd look cute on her, and she lifts her hand to tap the girls shoulder; making an attempt to kickstart a conversation. Maybe somehow this could turn them into lifelong friends. The line goes up, and the girl takes a step forward just before Caitlyn's hand touched her shoulder. Caitlyn sighs, staring at her hand still in the air and she drops it back to her side before she takes a step forward.
It was only a coincidence that the line happened to move at that exact time, but it doesn't make it any less embarrassing for Caitlyn. Completely devoids her of the little confidence she had managed to build up.
She stays in line for around 10 more minutes before it was her turn to order. She looks at the dishes before she tells the lunch lady what she wanted. The lady gives her her servings and Caitlyn whispers a small thank you before she turns and this is where her next problem presents itself.
Where would she sit? All the benches were filled, even in high school, there was always that empty bench where she almost always had to sit. Except those two times, Vi got invited to sit with some other kids. Complete contrast to her, everyone wanted Vi at their table but Vi was always content with just sitting next to Caitlyn. Never made her feel alone.
Now, there was no one to make her not feel alone.
Like a misfit.
"Uh, hey..." A nervous voice came from below, she turns hesitantly, staring down at the shorter guy who'd been seated at the very first table to her left. Great, now for the harassment. "You look lonely? Do you wanna sit with us?" He says bluntly, despite how timid he'd started. It gives Caitlyn whiplash a little but she also wasn't sure if it was a genuine invitation or just a mocking of one.
"Sorry for my brother. You don't have to sit with us, if you don't want to. I'm sure you've got a friend or so waiting for you." Another one smiles up at her, and she can't help but smile back in relief because maybe it was an actual invitation. She collects herself, trying to hide her excitement about being invited to do anything, really.
"I... No, actually. I am... kinda alone." She tells, a soft smile plays on her lips and the boy stares at her quite shocked.
"Oh, well, in that case..." He scoots over on the his side of the bench, making space for her and she hesitates for a second before she takes a seat next to him, placing her food on the table before her.
"I'm Mylo, the bozo beside you is Claggor and what's your name?" The first boy piped up, leaning forward and Caitlyn extends her hand to shake his as she speaks.
"I'm Caitlyn. It's nice to meet you guys."
"So, how come you're alone. You seem like the type to have too many friends." Claggor pries, and Caitlyn scoffs shaking her head.
"I wish I did but, I'm just not great with people, I guess."
"Hmm, well, we're kinda in the same boat. Only, I was blessed with having a brother so I'm not completely alone." Claggor tells, and Mylo rolls his eyes before Claggor continues. " Though, sometimes it feels more like a curse than a blessing, but I digress." Caitlyn chuckles with Claggor at that, before she picks up her fork and takes a bite at her food meanwhile, Mylo attempts to defend himself.
"Don't listen to him, just yesterday he had a whole monologue about how much he'd miss me because we found out weren't rooming together." Caitlyn looks to Claggor who shrugs, rolling his eyes.
"I thought we agreed, we'd take that to the grave." Claggor sighs, before he turns back to Caitlyn, desperately wanting to change the subject and he asks. "So, do you have any siblings that feel like a curse?"
"Oh, no. I've always wondered what it'd be like to have a little sister, though. You know, like a little doll I can dress up." Caitlyn takes another bite of her meal, quite content and Mylo scoffs, making Caitlyn look up confused. "Uh... sorry, did I say something wrong, I didn-" She adds, a nervous chuckle follows as her chest grows tight.
How'd I manage to mess up in 10 minutes?
"No, no. I just... had a bit a run in with someone yesterday. Just thought I meant more to her than it turns out I did." Mylo mutters, and he stares down at the table, his eyes focused on his fingers as he cracked them and Caitlyn could tell he was angered.
"You know that's not true, Mylo, she's-" Mylo cuts Claggor off, as he speaks.
"Why are you so hellbent on defending her? Fuck's sake, if it wasn't true, our conversation would've went a whole lot different yesterday. She didn't even try to make an effort, she just ran away. " He finishes, still staring at his rough fingers with furrowed brows. He didn't seem like he'd be any less upset any time soon.
"It's not a big deal, he'll get over it soon." Claggor tells Caitlyn, trying to undo the awkward atmosphere that was now brewing and Mylo clenches his jaw at his remark, seemingly thinking otherwise.
Caitlyn takes another bite of her food. Silence falls over them for a few more minutes as she keeps eating. She looks between the two, they'd each both been lost in thought it would seem and Caitlyn contemplates whether she should even try to break the silence. She lowers her fork before she speaks, hoping it's a not a complete waste.
"Is it your guys' first year?" She questions, and Mylo and Claggor turns their gazes to her. Mylo nods before Claggor speaks.
"Yeah, what about you?"
"It's the same for me, I could've started a bit sooner, but I took a gap year... or two, maybe... but don't tell anyone. "She tries to joke, and Claggor smiles at her amused. He could tell just how hard she was trying and something about that was almost endearing to him.
"I could barely even tell so, you're good." They continue, and Mylo gets further and further left behind in their conversation, only one thing on his mind and speak of the devil, they shall appear.
Mylo's eyes widen as the door of the cafeteria swings open, and he sees vibrant pink head of hair that could only belong to one person. It was Vi, and his gaze softens a bit when he takes her in. She seemed tired... broken down for lack of a better word and he sighs before he turns to Claggor and he speaks, cutting the older and Caitlyn's conversation short.
"Look who just popped in." He tells, somewhat amused and he nods his head in the direction Vi had been, and just as Claggor finds her gaze, he watches as she turns and makes her way straight through the door. Mylo shakes his head as he watches the door swing back and forth. "And again, she ran away. Who's surprised?" He scoffed.
"Do you guys... know her?" Caitlyn starts, an eyebrow raised and when Claggor nods, somehow it all just feels like a big joke. Like somehow she planned this and any minute now they were both going to start laughing at her for even buying into the idea that she could actually make any friends on her own.
"Yeah, wish I didn't, honestly." Mylo says, folding his arms before he leans on the table, glaring back at the door and it eases Caitlyn's mind a bit. If it was planned, Mylo wouldn't be that angry. She sighs, shaking her stupid thoughts away.
"Me too..." She opens, and Mylo and Claggor look at her confused before they pry, begging her for more information, and she spends the rest of their lunch going on about how she herself knew Vi.
----
Still, it was hard to wrap her head around the fact that somehow, Mylo and Claggor just coincidentally knew Vi. And just like her, she'd abandoned them. It makes her feel somewhat relieved. That meant it wasn't anything she'd done that led Vi away. She just left because that's what she does. She runs away.
Even then she can't escape her curiosity of wanting to know why.
Why would she just leave them so suddenly. And me?
There was no way her reasoning from last night was the full truth.
Her and Vi were doing great at the time, they'd butt heads but they were the best they'd been in such a long time and Vi had never given Caitlyn any reason to think that she'd be gone without any prior notice or goodbye.
Caitlyn folds her arms as she continued walking. Her best bet now was to just get back her dorm and study. She keeps on her track to her room when she hears a familiar voice, which stands out to her from the many chatter that filled her ears from everyone else around.
"I know you probably don't want to hear from me, given all the declined calls and the fact that I left and you didn't even say goodbye..." a small chuckle leaves her lips, slightly passive aggressive but still genuine. As she looks down, her hair falls off her shoulders, blocking her face. Caitlyn contemplates her next move as she watched the younger from a distance. " but I miss you... I just want to talk to you so if you could please just call me back...even just for a minute then that'd be great." She finishes, and her voice was so filled with desperation. She sounded tired - defeated even - in a way she's never really heard her before and Caitlyn's gaze softens. She swallows hard before she steps into the grass and starts making her way up to Vi.
She'd been seated in the grass, her back pressed up against the hard bark of the tree and Caitlyn wonders whether it was even remotely comfortable.
"Uh... hey." She starts, awkwardly, and Vi tilts her head up, meeting Caitlyn's gaze and she chuckles to herself, twirling her phone in her hand but she doesn't respond so Caitlyn continues. " Wasn't sure if I was gonna even find you in one piece after last night." She tries to joke, an awful attempt and it doesn't amuse Vi in the slightest. The shorter looks up for a second, the harsh light of the sun shining in her eyes forces her head back down as she speaks.
"Well, I didn't think you'd care. If I recall correctly, i believe you said it's better when I'm gone, so you should've been ecst-" Vi pauses at Caitlyn's next abrupt words.
"I'm sorry..." She takes just a few steps closer, standing almost directly over Vi, unknowingly becoming a kind of barricade, blocking the warm glow of the sun from getting to Vi.
"Hmm, didn't expect to hear those words from you, especially to... what do you always say?... Someone like me?" She jabs, and Caitlyn scoffs, rolling her eyes. She was never going to stop bringing that up, it would seem.
"Why do you always have to make things so hard. I'm trying to apologize and you're being difficult." Caitlyn whines, and Vi pulls herself up off the ground, slipping her phone into her pocket and she pulls her backpack up with one arm, before she slings it over her shoulder.
"Keep your apology Caitlyn, I know you don't mean it. Just like then you still see me as less than, and now I'm a little bit smarter than to settle fo-"
"What? I've never... I've never seen you as less than." She interrupts finding that statement completely ludicrous, and Vi stares at her unimpressed.
"Yeah, of course you would say that." She starts, as she goes to walk away but Caitlyn stops her, holding onto her wrist and Vi, looks down at the contact briefly before she pulls her hand away.
"Give me one example of when I've said or done something that makes you think that I think I'm better." She says, a little ignorant and Vi raises an eyebrow, genuinely wondering whether Caitlyn was still just painfully oblivious or whether she just liked pissing her off. Maybe it's both.
"Just 2 days ago, the first thing you asked me is what I'm doing here? As if someone like me doesn't belong here. Like all those years ago I wasn't the one who stayed up way past bedtime just to help you with whatever it was that you never fully understood from class" Caitlyn gulps, and she looks at Vi, dead in the eyes, almost as if it never occurred to her that Vi would even have any memories of their time together. It makes her wonder just how much Vi remembered.
"I- " she starts, but Vi stops her before she could, eyes narrowed and her previous angered expression slowly morphs into one of confusion, hurt.
"And then you do this thing where you emphasize the you... separating me. It's so obvious that somewhere in that big, stupid brain of yours, you see me as different... so different that you feel the need to keep reminding me. Does that seem like the behavior of someone who doesn't see me as beneath them?" She finishes, and she lets out a sigh of relief, like she'd been waiting to get all that off her chest for some time now.
"It's not like.... "
"I'm gonna be late for class... Yes, even someone like me wants to keep my attendance right." She retorts, turning to leave and Caitlyn follows after her for a while.
"Wait... Just let me explain." She begs, even though she didn't even have much of an explanation. At least, not one that would justify her words.
"Vi, I..." She calls one last time before she just lets her leave. Vi was clearly done with the conversation. Caitlyn runs a hand through her hair, as she watches Vi disappear into the 4th building. With muchh on her mind, Caitlyn made her way to her dorm.
Vi was beneath her? Of course she didn't think that. She'd have to be an idiot to think that but she couldn't lie, she knew what she was doing every time she'd said those things. In her mind, those phrases were the only way give Vi a taste of her medicine but thinking back maybe she shouldn't have. Especially given their history.
Vi was a calm kid, knew how to avoid conflict really well. A lot of the times, she just chose not to because... well, she's not entirely sure. Just like now Vi was never one to express herself. Never made herself easy to understand and a lot of times it was hard to make sense of anything Vi did. Despite all that, Caitlyn knew one thing. She didn't like to be belittled. There were many phrases and throw away lines that Caitlyn could recall being tossed at Vi from their high school days. The very cruel one's she wishes she could forget but none of those ever messed Vi up like "someone like you.". That's why she used it, to...get even, she guesses but now she just felt awful.
Everything else people said to Vi just made her angry, and she had one of two reactions, she'd flip out and break someone's jaw or she'd call this one guy, who she spoke about briefly and every now and then. Vander, she may be wrong but he always seemed to know what to say to calm her down. And at one point, Caitlyn had hoped she'd one day be that person Vi trusted enough to call whenever she needed help, yet here they were.
And then there was her reaction to someone like you. Vi was a brawler. As tough as rocks and they never started off on the right foot so naturally there was aggression, from both sides. Too stubborn for their own good.
"This doesn't make any sense, Mrs Whyle. I should have gotten the highest grade. I always do. Something isn't right." Caitlyn argues, tearing up as she stared at her teacher, her test paper raised in front of her teacher's face and before the woman answers, she hears a snicker coming from the bozo next to her.
"Let's see how loud you'll be laughing when Mrs. Whyle reviews your paper and realizes you literally cheated." Caitlyn raises and the taller girl rolls her eyes as she adjusts her backpack on her back.
"How would I have cheated? There were eyes everywhere. Not to mention you were right next to me and if I cheated off your paper that would have left me with a guaranteed failing grade." She argues and Caitlyn scoffs.
"Right, like a Zaunite wouldn't know how to cheat in the riskiest of places and I know you're new but it doesn't take a genius to recognize that I am always top of the class."
"Suddenly that 90% is making sense." Caitlyn scoffs again, as she turns to the pink haired girl offended.
"Are you calling me stupid?"
"Stupid, idiotic, complete buffoon. Whichever title you'd like." She sasses and Mrs. Whyle sighs before she stands.
"Violet, that's no way to talk to your classmate." Caitlyn smiles knowingly, folding her arms, almost in triumph.
"You don't get to call me that. It's Vi and she literally started it. Why am I the only who-"
"I think you've said enough, Violet." She says again, as she hands Vi her paper and the pink haired girl huffs before she glares at the judgmental woman. Caitlyn sighs, looking beside her as Vi observed her paper, then she looks up at the teacher again, with the same hard stare.
"This is not my paper," she argued, and Caitlyn looks over at her angered face just before the teacher hands her her paper.
Caitlyn takes the paper, happily and as she glances on the hundred percent, she almost smiles before she realizes that what Vi had been saying was true. At the top of the paper, her name had been rewritten above a crossed out blotch below it. There was no doubt that beneath all that layer of ink, was Vi's name.
"Violet, I think you should go home. Presuming, you even have one. " The woman probes and Vi scoffs, finding the whole situation, ridiculous.
"Fuck you." She mutters and Caitlyn chokes on her spit a bit as she watched her leave, angrily. Caitlyn turns to her shocked teacher, who flipped through her notebook, before she angrily started writing and Caitlyn's sure it was something about that pink haired girl but seeing the way the woman wrote angrily - almost eagerly, - it became very apparent that maybe it wouldn't be the best idea to bother her. Caitlyn packs her stuff before she runs out of her empty class room. The corridors were empty for the most part seeing as school ended about 50 minutes ago. The only person in sight was Vi. She stood before the large glass wall, next to exit of the school, watching as the rain poured heavily on the outside. Caitlyn sighs, walking up to her as she stood at the door exit.
"Go away." Vi starts, stepping away from Caitlyn, who steps away too, glaring at the other.
"Did you really not cheat?"
"Again, I sat right next to you, if I cheated I'm sure you'd notice but it doesn't matter because she gave you my paper so, congratulations Piltie, you got what you wanted without having to lift a pinky for it." She says, her voice softer than back then, somewhat shaky and Caitlyn hadn't really known what that had meant.
" I didn't tell her to give your paper to me, and if you must know I just never realized someone like you could be as smart as me. That's all." At the time, she had never realized how fucked up of a thing that was to say to someone. Vi glances over at her, for the first time really and Caitlyn just stares back and she's not sure what she had expected but it wasn't the rushed blinking as tears threatened to fall from her eyes and it takes Caitlyn aback.
Vi turns away hurriedly, wiping her tears as stealthily as she could but it was almost impossible to do since it got to a point where you could hear her muffled sobs. The thing is they came down so easily. Caitlyn wonders if she had just been holding them in and then her last comment was just the last straw.
She still had her back turned, wiping tears but they didn't seem to want to stop and she was trying her best to hold it in but she was failing miserably. For a second, Caitlyn thinks to leave but she couldn't shake the feeling that she needed to fix this somehow. She made her cry and let's just say she'd rather have Vi screaming at her than hear her sobbing uncontrollably like this. Caitlyn takes a breath, then she takes a few steps forward as more sobs filled the atmosphere. Some other kids walk by, none bat an eye at the saddened girl and Caitlyn wonders whether, that would be the case if she was Vi's situation.
She takes yet another step and Vi must've felt her proximity as she tries to move but before she could, Caitlyn wraps her arms around the taller from behind. Her sobs falter and her breathing picks up drastically. Confused, Vi quickly pulls herself out of Caitlyn's grip before she turns to look at the other, upset. Her eyes were red, stained and sticky from her tears and she goes to open her mouth, probably to cuss Caitlyn out but Caitlyn hugs her again before she can.
She tries to push Caitlyn away again, but it doesn't work. She held her too tightly this time.
"I didn't mean to make you cry." Caitlyn spoke as she pat Vi's back gently, like her mom always did when she cried and Vi stops fidgeting for a second. Maybe in confusion, Caitlyn's not sure but at some point Vi'd leaned into the hug. Almost felt like she collapses onto to Caitlyn, and she just continued crying. For a mighty long time, Caitlyn remembers just how sore her legs were when she got home. They had been standing there for about an hour, she never regretted it though.
After Vi's whole cry session they'd gotten outside. The rain had stopped, and sun peaked out just barely from behind the clouds. Maybe indicative of how Vi probably felt in that moment. There was banter here and there and they'd both been waiting for their parents. Caitlyn had somehow managed to trip over nothing but her two feet and fell into the grass. At some point she'd successfully managed to con Vi into helping her up, just to pull her down in the grass too. They spent about an hour just laying on the cold, wet grass of the playfield; talking. It was unbelievably uncomfortable but they could've made efforts to move at any point, yet they never did. They were content, more than anything else. They were slowly learning to let there guard down. Realizing they weren't so different. Not precisely how Caitlyn had seen this whole exchange going. She never thought she'd talk to Vi again yet once she got home that's all she thought about.
That was the last time she'd ever seen Vi cry, and the first. After that, they'd become inseparable and in Caitlyn's mind, it really baffled her how they were ever at odds. Briefly, but still, if she could somehow go back in time she'd have hugged Vi way sooner, just to have more time with other. Even if it was only 2 weeks tops.
Caitlyn pushes the door of her dorm open, and she hangs her bag on her hat rack then she starts taking her clothes off. She needed a shower.
Once she's done, she opens her drawer, pulling out a pair of boy shorts and a top. She slips into them before she hops onto her bed. For a second, she stares up the ceiling and she closes her eyes as Vi's voice pops into her head.
you see me as different... so different that you feel the need to keep reminding me.
She really needed to apologize, she wanted to. Mainly, because she just wants this to be over with. Maybe she could apologize and then they could...start over, maybe? Just like when they were kids and then they'd become best friends again.
She knew that was only wishful thinking.
She picks up her book, turning onto her stomach before she opens the book and she starts reading. She makes some flashcards while she was at it, and she'd say she did a much better job than she'd done the day prior but she's only about 3 hours into her study session when the door swings open, and Vi reveals herself.
Caitlyn looks up from her books, and she watched as Vi scrambled over to her side of the room. She drops her bag to the floor, next to her bed before she slips into her closet. Caitlyn looks away, trying to zone the other out so she could finish up the current chapter she'd been on.
That got progressively harder as she could hear Vi shuffling around in her closet. Caitlyn sighs in frustration the next time she hears some commotion from the left side of the room. She turns her head, and her eyes randomly meets Vi's for a second and the other raises an eyebrow, challenging Caitlyn to say something.
"Can you keep it down? Trying to study over here" Caitlyn argues, and she looks away, turning her attention back to her books. Her remarks pull no response from Vi, which she hadn't expected. That should make her happy, yet that wasn't exactly the way she'd describe how she feels right now.
Really, the first thing she should've done was apologize to Vi, but she put herself in offense mode without the need to. Only for Vi to ignore her. She wishes she knew just how to do that too.
She looks over at the other again, and it settles in that she'd been cleaning up. Caitlyn chuckles a little at that because how stubborn can one person be? She'd already done all that for Vi, yet she chose to undo it... just to do it again? She shouldn't be amused by that, but she can't help it.
She shakes her head, then she takes a deep breath.
Focus. Just a few more pages until I'm done with Chapter 3.
She sits up, getting on her knees. Maybe changing her position from a less comfortable one would help. It does for about the next 20 minutes before she'd glanced back in the other's direction. She could see her more clearly from her new position. She was folding the clothes she'd have thrown around. She looks away, letting herself fall over on her book in disappointment.
This shouldn't be this, hard.
She snaps out of her thoughts when Vi passes by her bed, her towel and fresh clothing slung over her shoulders as she made her way into the bathroom.
That was quick
Caitlyn stares at the closed door, as she pushes her books away, using her pen as a bookmark before she flips it closed. She huffs as she pushed herself up off her bed, finding her way in front of the entrance of Vi's closet.
She looks behind her, briefly at the bathroom door, before she steps inside the closet. She'd had almost everything thrown around in here, Caitlyn had doubted for a second that she'd even have tidied it well enough in the 20 minutes she'd spent in here. It's baffling how well she managed to put things in place in such short time.
Caitlyn wanders further into her closet, and she stretches a hand out, her fingers brush against the others clothes. Skimming through them, just because.
Or maybe it's more than that.
Maybe it's because she's a freak who still remembers a lot of the clothes she'd seen Vi wear in the past few days. She never wore her size, and she didn't seem to grow all that much so it's no surprise that she could still fit in them even after so long. She lets her hands linger on one particular jacket, a smile rises on her lips almost too quickly.
She kept this?
Caitlyn picks the jacket up off the rack, swiping her thumbs over the soft material as she brought it closer to her face. It was hers, or Vi's since she'd given it to the other. Vi had left her jacket on one cold rainy day, despite the several reminders Caitlyn had given her about the impending weather conditions yet Vi showed up to school in gear not all that suitable for cold weather. In her defense, the sun was up all day. By midday, she was shivering to no end and Caitlyn just knew she had to keep her warm. Even if that meant giving up her own warmth.
She lifts the jacket to her face, and she breathes it in for a second. She takes it in for a hot minute, letting her mind be plagued by all the good memories she'd buried somewhere in the back of her head over the past 5 years. She sighs at herself as she pulls the jacket away from her face. It smells exactly like her.
What am I doing?
She stares down at the jacket, with a scowl, hating how much comfort this alone brought to her. Hated how hard she had to be trying not to smile every 5 seconds about the fact that Vi kept her jacket.
She keeps the jacket in her hand as she continues lurking around the room, for anything she recognized. There wasn't much else that caught her eye, except for a photo. She stretches her right hand forward, reaching to pick it up.
Caitlyn tilts her head slightly, bringing the photo closer to her face so she could examine it better. She smiles again. It was a simple family photo. Vi, and presumably her sister sat in the middle of their parents, who hug them from behind, squishing them together. They all looked so happy, you wouldn't be wrong in thinking there was no other place for them than with each other and her smile falls as she hears the creak of the bathroom door.
Caitlyn hurriedly drops the photo onto the table next to Vi's wardrobe before she tries to put the jacket back where she'd gotten it from before Vi-
"What are...What are you doing?" Vi's voice rang through the room, somewhat slurred, her voice strained as if she was in pain. Caitlyn swears beneath her breath, and she tries to step out of the room, but Vi stands before the doorway, her face riddled with confusion. She stares up at Caitlyn's eyes for a second, a habit if you will but Caitlyn had been staring elsewhere.
Vi smiles smugly a bit at that, as she reaches forward, pulling her jacket from Caitlyn's hands and it seemingly pulls her out of her thoughts.
She'd only been wearing a dark blue stringer tank top - which had been bedewed in a few areas, as water dripped from her dampened pink hair -and a sweatpants, that hung low on her hip. The shirt was just short enough for you to barely get a glimpse of her toned stomach, a tease almost. That wasn't what caught Caitlyn's attention though, more so the way Vi's arms were fully unclothed at the moment and she could actually take in how muscular the other had gotten.
The only thing she could think was that it felt right, like this was how she was suppose to look, at least for her because she can't focus. Vi throws the jacket over her shoulder before she folds her arms, leaning against the door hinge and Caitlyn rolls her jaw back, before she gulps.
"You know, I don't understand you at all. You clearly don't want me around yet you're everywhere, always trying to start something with me. Don't you think if you just ignore me the same way I ignore you, then I won't "ruin" things like you claim I always do?" Vi starts, an unimpressed expression on her face and Caitlyn sighs, folding her arms too then she steps past Vi, before she sits on Vi's bed, trying to figure out what she wanted to say.
What does she want with Vi by the end of this?
She chuckles openly, and Vi turns around to face her as she pulled the jacket off her shoulder.
It's only been 3 days and somehow that 5 years of progress she slowly made was being erased. Somehow, now she doesn't hate the idea of them rekindling the friendship they once had.
All because she kept a freaking jacket.
"You were right. " She says, and Vi sighs before she turns into her closet. Caitlyn seemed to enjoy making her confused. Vi puts the jacket back on the rack and she stares at it for a second.
Does she even remember that it's hers?
Vi turns back to Caitlyn, folding her arms as she speaks. She was less concerned with Caitlyn and more so concerned with the growing emptiness that was in stomach, and the worsening headache she was currently experiencing. She really needed to get something to eat at some point.
"I don't know what you're blathering on about and I don't care to know what it is either so-" Caitlyn cuts her off, partially because she knew Vi would say something like that and she just wants to get her thoughts off her chest.
"I did say all those things to make you feel less than...more so because I wanted to hurt you." She pauses, and takes a second to stare up at Vi, as she scoffs knowingly. "I just... You don't get it, okay? You...You hurt me..." She admits, and her eyes meets Vi's again, and this time Vi's hardened exterior softens. "more than you'll probably ever understand and then after I finally was starting to move on with my life, you show up out of nowhere. I just wanted to hurt you because maybe I felt like it's what you deserved... I thought that hurting you would make me feel better so I went as low as I could... And I'm sorry. I really am." She finishes, and there's a lot she was hoping for. A lot she had riding on Vi's response, yet Vi just didn't care.
"Okay." Vi deadpans and Caitlyn looks up at her again, mouth opened slightly as her brows furrow and then she just laughs a bit at the absurdity of it all.
"That's all you have to say?" Vi shrugs before she leans on the door hinge again.
"What else do you want me to say? I've got nothing."
"Hm, Mylo was right. You just don't care, do you?" She raises, and Vi gulps, she hadn't been expecting that. Didn't like it but she had no right to care whether Caitlyn was making friends with Mylo and Claggor. They could do whatever they wanted to do especially since she's the one who practically discarded them.
"No, actually, I don't. Now, if you're done, I'd like to get some sleep because my head feels like it's seconds away from blowing up and I don't have anything else to say to you." She tells, it was true and as much as she'd like to complain it was her doing. She'd drank again instead of getting something to eat. In her defense, she had tried but of course Mylo and Claggor had to be there and with Caitlyn at that. She didn't want to engage in any of the further confrontation that would bring so she left. As one does.
"Maybe, you could tell me why you left me like that? Why you made all those promises you knew you were never going to keep? Anything but what you told me last night... " she pleads, and her voice goes slightly inaudible at the last few word. Vi sighs, balling her hand into fists as she leans back against the wall, sliding down to the floor. Caitlyn was not going to let this go at all, was she?
"Things happen Caitlyn, and that was what? 5 years ago, I-"
"Just tell me why you left? Can't you see that.... it's fucking with me. It's been fucking with me for the entire 5 years... Please." She sounded the most desperate she ever had and Vi looks up at her with heavy eyes, through thick lashes before she huffs. There was no denying that she did owe the other an explanation, one that was long overdue.
"It's simple, my dad lost his job and we couldn't afford for me to keep going to Piltover Prep anymore." She mutters, her eyes growing heavier and heavier by the minute. Hopefully that was enough for Caitlyn to just leave her be.
Caitlyn does get some relief from that, because it was confirmation that she hadn't done anything. Something she'd struggled to believe over the years but now Vi just technically told her that it really wasn't because of her. That was great, but it just leaves the door open for more questions.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Her voice is soft, somewhat understanding and Caitlyn unconsciously moves closer to Vi, maybe about 3 steps more before the older would be hovering over her. Vi was expecting the other to flip out again, or at least be somewhat hostile but she wasn't. not even in the slightest.
"None of this matters anymore, Caitlyn. " She tries again, just wanting to end the conversation.
Again, it's like she didn't care. It mattered to Caitlyn. More than she wanted it to and it drives her up the wall just how indifferent Vi was about it all.
"Can't you, at least, i don't know, act like you're sorry... like leaving was even just a tiny bit hard for you. I spent months telling myself and everyone that you'd come back... that you'd never leave me like that. Can you imagine how devastating it was for me when a whole year had passed? And then 2 years. 3 years... and somehow I just couldn't forget you or anything about you. Hmm, You probably forgot about me the second you found a new school, huh?" Her eyes grow teary for a second before she wipes them, hanging her head low in anticipation of Vi's response. Vi stares at her for second, struggling to keep the other in focus. Her head was spinning and that should have raised some flags but she chalks it up to her just being drunk on an empty stomach and needing some sleep.
"Yeah..." She pauses, letting out a slow breath before she continues; sarcastically. "If that's what you wanna believe then fine. I... I forgot about you the second I started a new school." Her words came out in a struggle as she slid back up against the wall, wincing every time she moved her head.
What's wrong with me?
Caitlyn stares at the other from where she stood. She'd had her back pressed up against the wall, her arms crossed and a pained expression lingers on her face.
"Are you okay?" Caitlyn starts, and she doesn't wait for a response from the other before she takes slow steps over to Vi, closing a huge amount of the gap that had lingered between them. Vi still keeps her eyes closed, realizing that may be a chance that she wasn't just drunk and needed to sleep this off.
She tries to take a step forward but her legs seemed to not be up for the challenge, giving out just slightly. She doesn't fall though, she just barely feels soft hands holding her up before she's gently being lowered to the floor. Vi groans as her head bobs around, and Caitlyn's voice goes in and out and then there's nothing.
"Vi?" Caitlyn calls, way too loudly and she stretches a timid hand out to hold the other's head up as it falls forward; completely limp.
---