Chapter Text
With quick steps, Shepard strides toward the cockpit. Joker’s announcement about the jump through the mass relay sparked her excitement, she wouldn’t miss this for anything. She passes Pressly with a big smile on her lips.
Suddenly she stops dead in her tracks and her smile vanishes. A tall figure is standing behind the pilot seat.
Suppressing a groan, Shepard rolls her eyes and steps into position beside Joker, completely ignoring the turian standing nearby. Nihlus glances at her for a moment before returning his attention back on the screens in front of the pilot.
“Hey, Shep,” Joker greets with a grin, knowing she wouldn’t miss the jump. But his grin also is short lived and soon disappears. The turian's looming presence unsettles him. Joker hates being watched and the turian breathing down his neck is making him nervous. “Coming for the show?” he asks, his voice a little strained.
Shepard chuckles. “Always.”
Joker adjusts his cap and announces, “Alright, fasten your seatbelts, ladies and gentlemen. We’re going through.” His fingers fly over the console as the Normandy accelerates toward the mass relay. The sheer scale of the relays never fails to impress Shepard, who watches intently as Joker counts down. The cockpit bathes in brilliant blue light as the Normandy launches into the relay’s energy field.
Suddenly the blue sigts into a stunning sea of millions of stars flashes before them, painting the cockpit in a tranquil glow. Shepard’s lips twitch into a small smile as awe briefly replaces her earlier irritation. The sight is simply beautiful.
Moments later, the Normandy slows down, the stars of their destination stretching out before them. Joker’s hands fly over the controls as he runs post-jump diagnostics. “Thrusters check, navigation check. Internal emissions sink engaged. All systems online. Drift just under 1500k.”
Nihlus nods approvingly. “1500 is good, your captain will be pleased.” He turns around to take his leave, glancing at Shepard for one final time before exiting the cockpit.
Joker quickly looks over his shoulder, waiting until the turian is out of earshot. “I hate this guy.” Shepard smirks, holding back laughter at Joker’s visible frustration. Kaidan, who is sitting at the co-pilot console, is shaking his head. “Joker, come one. He just gave you a compliment.”
“Compliment my ass.” The pilot girths through his teeth, “I just jumped us halfway across the whole galaxy and hit a target the size of a pinhead. That’s not good , that's incredible. ” While grumbling some curses, Joker's focus returns to his displays. “Besides Spectres are trouble. I don't like having him around.” Neither do I , Shepard thinks to herself. Nihlus belongs on the Citadel, not Andersons ship. Kaidan argues, “The council helped fund this project. They have a right to send someone to keep an eye on their investment. You’ll just have to deal with it.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Joker sighs as he enters in new codes. “That's the official story. But only an idiot believes the official story, right, Shep?”
The Commander finally relaxes her posture, letting out a deep sigh. "Honestly? The Council could have sent anyone to supervise the operation, yet they not only sent a Spectre, but him out of all people. They are not truly concerned about the Normandy. The sooner he’s off my ship the better.”
Joker looks at her with a shit-eating grin, “Well, technically it’s Captain Anderson's ship.”
“And technically-” Shepard whispers as she pushes Joker's cap down, right into his face. “You know what I meant.”
“Hey, that's mean!” He complains. He takes his cap off to readjust it properly. “Since when are you sensitive? Pissed you two can't share your bunks anymore?”
Shepard’s glare could set fire to steel. “Don’t test my tamper, Mr. Moreau.” As much as she loves Joker, sometimes he doesn’t know when he’s going too far.
Irritated by Shepards sudden bad mood, Kaidan turns his chair to look at the Commander. “Okay, I feel like I’m missing something. What’s going on?” Joker just huffs a laugh. “Yeah sure, Aleko. As if you don’t know about it.”
“About what?” He asks, raising his brows in question.
Joker stays quiet, leaving Shepard to decide whether she wants to tell Kaidan or not. After a moment of consideration, Shepard explains what’s been going on. “You’ll probably learn it from the others anyway, so I might as well tell you. Kryik and I were involved… romantically.”
Kaidan’s jaw drops to the ground. “What?”
“Yep.” She sighs. “Have been just until a few months ago actually.”
“Well, given your mood, I guess it didn’t end well?” Kaiden asks carefully.
“That’s one way to put it.” Shepard crosses her arms in front of her chest. “We’ve been dating for some time and then things moved quite quickly. Everything was peachy until, from one day to another, he changed. Suddenly he treated me like a stranger and when I confronted him about it, he told me that it was all a big mistake, that turians and humans shouldn’t be together and that he regrets it.”
Kaidan looks at her with wide blown eyes, stunned into silence.
Shepard casts him a sad smile. “That’s exactly the look I had, when he told me all of this.” A ping on her omni tool announces a new message. “For fuck sake.”
“Speaking of the devil, huh?” Joker asks.
“Yup.” Shepard deletes Nihlus message without even bothering to read it. “It’s bad enough to see him strolling through the ship the whole day, can’t he just have the decency to not annoy me even further?”
Suddenly Anderson's voice sounds over the speakers. “Commander Shapard, I need to speak to you in my cabin.”
“Uh!” Joker smiles brightly at her. “Someone’s in trouble.”
Shepard just rolls her eyes, tempted to mess with his cap again. “Bite me, Jeff.”
Quickly the Commander makes her way to the elevator. Once inside, she hits the button for the mess hall a bit harder than necessary. She lets out an irritated sigh before rubbing her eyes. Whatever Nihlus is actually here for, she’s just hoping it will be done as soon as possible.
Eventually the elevator doors open again, releasing her. Shepard goes straight for the Captain's cabin. She knocks on the door before it wooshes open. “How can I be of service?” She asks, while entering.
Captain Anderson is sitting at his desk. He turns around to face her. “Lynette.” is all he says in greeting. He signs for Shepard to sit on the seat across from him. “I have to talk to you.”
“Of course.” She says as she’s taking a seat, crossing her legs.
The captain sighs deeply. He is visibly uncomfortable. “Lynette, I’ll be blunt—this conversation isn’t easy for me, and I doubt it will be for you either.”
Shepard tilts her head slightly, her brow furrowing.
Anderson takes a deep breath. “You’re familiar with Alliance regulations about fraternization aboard a ship, I assume?”
Shepard groans, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Oh, Anderson, please don’t.”
“I have to,” Anderson says, his tone almost contrite. “Look, I’m not here to pry into your personal life. But with Nihlus aboard, I need your assurance that… whatever happened between you two won’t interfere with missions or ship operations.”
“Of course not, Anderson.” Shepard affirms. She might hate Nihlus guts but she won’t act on her ill feelings, she’s too professional for anything else. “I promise.”
Anderson nods slightly in approval. “Good to hear.”
“Allow me a question, sir?” Shepard crosses her arms casually. “What’s the actual reason for a Spectre to be here?”
Anderson falls back into his chair. “That’s classified.”
“Oh?” Lynette’s eyebrows raise, a small smirk tugging at her lips. “So there is another reason?”
The Captain narrows his eyes for a moment as he realizes his slip. “That’s something we will discuss tomorrow, Shepard. That’s all I can tell you at the moment.”
“Very well.” She says. “Is there anything else you wanted to talk about?”
Anderson hesitates again, his voice softening. “Actually, yes. It might not be my place to ask, but… have you and Nihlus ever talked about what happened? Afterward, I mean.”
“Nope.” Shepard shakes her head.“ After he blew on me, I packed my things and left. Haven't seen or heard from him ever since and as far as I'm concerned, I'd like to keep it that way.”
Certainly she knows the space on the ship is limited and therefore the chance of running into him is pretty high but that doesn't mean she can't at least try to avoid him.
Anderson just nods silently. “Just do me the favor and keep it low, okay? This is not meant to anger you.”
“Yeah, sure.” She whispers to herself when she stands up. “Sir.” She salutes casually at her Captain before leaving his cabin again.
A new cycle has started on the Normandy. Breakfast has started to be giving out in the mess, which is slowly starting to get crowded. Soldiers shuffle through the line, grabbing trays of rations, some exchanging groggy greetings while others simply nurse their coffee in silence.
Kaidan sits at a corner table, chatting with Doctor Chakwas. Anticipating the morning rush, he’s already picked up an extra tray for their Commander, placing it at the empty seat beside him. He hopes the small gesture will help lift her mood, which has been notably sour since Nihlus arrived.
The tables conversation drifts between topics, focusing on Kaidan’s latest episode of headaches, when Shepard finally appears. “Morning, Commander!” Kaidan calls, spotting Shepard as she strides into the mess.
Mid-yawn, Shepard perks up slightly at the sound of his voice. Her eyes dart to the tray waiting for her, and she gives him a tired but genuine smile. “Kaidan, you’re too good to me,” she says with a tired smile, sliding into the seat.
“I live to serve,” he replies, the corners of his mouth quirking into a small grin.
“Good morning, Commander.” Doctor Chakwas her kindly. “Slept well?”
“Well enough,” Shepard replies, though she’s already diving into her breakfast.
The conversation between Kaidan and Chakwas resumes with Shepard not contributing much, her focus is entirely on her meal. The calm is short-lived though, as a familiar voice breaks through the low hum of the mess.
“Lynette, do you have a minute?”
Shepard freezes mid-bite, suppressing a groan. It’s far too early to deal with him. Without looking up, she responds in a clipped tone, “Good morning, Spectre. The correct form of address is Commander Shepard, and no, I don’t.”
In an instant the air is becoming tense. The surrounding tables go quiet, soldiers suddenly finding reasons to focus on their food or shuffle away. Kaidan shifts uncomfortably in his seat and Chakwas raises an eyebrow but says nothing. Both share a quick uncomfortable glance. Nihlus pauses, clearly weighing his options. Finally, the turian straightens. “Commander,” he says simply, before turning on his heel and walking away toward the elevator.
Once he’s gone, Chakwas sighs as she looks at Shepard. Her voice carries a hint of disapproval. “Was that really necessary?”
“No,” Shepard admits, spearing a piece of food. “But a fork to his eyes might be.”
“Shepard!” Chakwas scolds, her eyes wide blown. “You’re an adult woman, for heaven’s sake.”
“I’m kidding, Karin." Lynette replies, raising her hands in mock surrender. “Probably.”
Before Chakwas can retort, Joker’s voice crackles over the speakers. “Commander Shepard, you’re needed in the comm room.”
Shepard exhales heavily, dropping her fork onto the tray with a clatter. “Of course I am.”
Quickly she rises to her feet. While gesturing to the tray, she’s giving Kidan a nod. “Thanks for grabbing this, Alenko.”
“Anytime,” he smiles, watching her retreat toward the elevator.
It was late in the morning, almost midday, when the Commander returned from the meeting she had with Anderson and Nihlus. Seeing Joker was the first thing she did. As annoying as the Pilot can be at times, he is still one of Shepards closest friends. He was the first and only one she broke the news to.
“Spectre, I can't believe it.” She says while looking at the stars, swaying gently from side to side in the chair, her tone softening. “I really can’t believe it.”
It’s an honor, that’s for sure. Becoming the first human Spectre is nothing Lynette could have ever imagined would happen in her career. She’ll definitely have to give her mother a call later.
“Yeah, about time, huh?” Joker asks, his voice full of sarcasm. “About time the Council added humans to their puppet show. You know, gotta make sure every species gets tangled in their strings” The Commander frowns at him. “Sorry, Shep. I really don’t mean to shit on your accomplishments. It's just…”
“You’re not fond of the council. I know.” She smiles lightly.
“One way to put it. My point is I don’t like you being dragged into their political bullshit. I mean, see what they did. They could have sent about any Spectre to test you, yet they’ve sent King Asshole.”
“Yeah, I know.” The woman agrees. “Let’s put her under a real stress test. Why don’t we force her and her racist ex into a small tin can of a ship for a week?”
That elicits a laugh from the Pilot. "Exactly. Politicians, man. Bunch of jerks in fancy robes.”
Lynette snickers in return, shaking her head. She’s not too fond of politicians either. After stretching her arms, she leans back into the co-pilot seat more comfortably, hr eyes fixated on the stars outside the window. The tension in her shoulders begins to ease, but the sound of approaching footsteps in the corridor snaps her out of it.
“Commander Shepard, I need to talk to you.” Nihlus comes to stand right at the entrance of the cockpit.
Shepard glances at him quickly, before replying. “I'm busy.”
But Nihlus is not having her defiance right now. “That is not a request.”
Joker looks at the both of them. Sensing trouble, he quickly decides to remove himself from this situation. Carefully he stands up from his beloved seat. “Know what, I was just about to grab some coffee in the mess. My cockpit is all yours.”
Lynette glares at him for abandoning her but Joker just gives her a knowing, apologetic smile before disappearing down the corridor.
Once Joker is out of earshot, Lynette stands up as well. “Alright, what do you want?”
Nihlus stands tall, his hands clasped behind his back, the picture of turian discipline but the subtle flare of his mandibles betrays him. “Shepard, believe it or not, this situation is just as unpleasant for me as it is for you.”
“Oh, ‘s that so?” Her voice is full of sarcasm as she's leaning against her seat.
Nihlus marbles flare again. His eyes leave her for a second, before he calmly states, “This is temporary. Just until the mission is complete. Once it’s done, I’ll file my report, inform the Council and take my leave.
Deciding to reduce the hostility, Shepard reflexes her arms again. “Well, sounds good.”
After a long and silent moment, the turian straightens up. “Shepard, despite what happened between us, I need you to stay focused once we’re planetside.”
Lynette can’t help but to narrow her eyes at him. “What?”
“Your ill manners towards me on board the ship are one thing but we can’t have your feelings interfere with the mission.” Nihlus’ voices lacks any emotion,“ We have to-”
“Stop.” Shepard cuts him off, visibly getting angry. “Are you really doubting me and my capability to keep my emotions in check?”
“I am just giving you well ment advice, Commander.” Nihlus states dryly. “This mission and the opportunity for you is way too important to be risk by emotional breakdowns.”
That’s it. Now it’s getting insulting. “Don't you fucking dare to tell me how I should feel and act.” Shepard hisses through gritted teeth. “You're not in the position!”
Nihlus’s voice drops, cold and clipped. “You think this is easy for me? Do you have any idea what it’s like to be caught between your feelings and your duty?”
She takes a step closer, her voice icy cold, “Don’t you dare play the victim, Kryik.”
Nihlus just shakes his head lightly, “Lynette, look-”
“Don't you Lynette me!” Shepherd's voice rises in volume, gaining attention from nearby standing officers.
“Spirits, woman.” Nihlus exhales, visibly frustrated. “I know I’ve hurt you,” he says, his tone gentler now, “I know I’ve hurt you, I know you’re still angry and by the stars, you have every right to. I am sorry-”
The speakers on the bridge light up. Captain Anderson orders the ship to prepare for entering the planet's orbit and for the ground team to gear up.
Following the command, Shepard pushes past the turian to get away. Her voice is dripping with venom, when she glares at him one final time, “For all I care, Nihlus, you can just drop fucking dead.”