Chapter Text
When Tobias opened the door to Caitlyn’s room, he spotted Vi lying awake in the hospital bed, Caitlyn snug against her sleeping soundly. Vi looked from the mural on the ceiling to Tobias at the door and started to carefully remove herself from Caitlyn and off the bed.
Tobias closed the door and approached Caitlyn, stopping next to her to feel her forehead. Vi took in the visual of a father wanting to check on his sick daughter, as she is sure he would have many, many times before. But she was especially watching him now, trying to gauge his reaction.
“Can you please pass me the log?” He asked.
“Sure,” Vi answered, reaching past the monitor to grab the clipboard. In the moment she was reaching, Tobias noticed the discolouration inside her hand, but looked away before she turned to hand the clipboard over. He took it, with a nod of thanks and began skimming the recent logs while he had been gone.
Vi continued to watch him closely.
“How long were you planning to hide those wounds?” He asked Vi, not taking his eyes from the logs.
“What?” She countered, expecting to hear something about Caitlyn.
“Your hand,” he noted, looking up from the log now, “are they from the battle?”
“I’m fine,” she responded.
He hummed, “been hearing that a lot from you lately. Most times, people will say that when they’re not fine.”
“I’m not most people,” Vi shrugged.
“You’re not,” he agreed, “But you’re also not fine, Vi.”
“I’m not your concern.” Vi could feel herself getting defensive, “and my hands aren’t relevant right now.”
“Hands?” He asked, “you have them on both hands? Are they from the gauntlets?”
“It doesn’t matter,” Vi exclaimed, growing frustrated. Caitlyn stirred slightly at Vi’s reaction.
Tobias put the clipboard down in Vi’s chair and nodded towards the door, indicating the conversation should continue outside. Vi sighed heavily and followed him out to the chairs in the ward waiting room. She slumped down in one, arms crossed, and Tobias took a seat next to her.
“You’ve become a concern for me,” he confessed, “dare I say that I’m even worried?”
Vi gave a short chuckle, “worried about someone like me?”
“Why do you find that so hard to believe?” Tobias challenged.
“Is that a serious question?”
“Yes,” he nodded, waiting for an answer. Vi scoffed and looked away.
“Forget it.”
“Vi,” he started, “you’re consumed by caring for my daughter and I can’t fault you for that, but the self-inflicted neglect is concerning.”
Vi rolled her eyes, “can you just tell me what the doctor said about Cait?”
“I will after this conversation,” he promised.
“Are you kidding? You’re just going to hold Cait’s medical information hostage from me because I won’t talk about feelings with you?”
“It wouldn’t usually be like this, but Caitlyn would want me to check-in. It would pain her to know that you’re deprived and hurt with her as the price,” Tobias stated.
Vi shook her head and kept looking away from Tobias, refusing to make eye contact.
“Vi,” he tried again, “you don’t eat unless I bring you food. You’ll pour Caitlyn water, but you won’t pour any for yourself. You’ll rest your eyes, but you won’t sleep. I understand the tunnel-vision, but you can’t help Caitlyn with her recovery if you’re not recovering too. You’re burning out fast.”
“So?” She scoffed again.
“So, Caitlyn would want you to go home and get some rest,” Tobias concluded.
“You can’t expect me to do that now?” Vi fought.
“It’s true that Caitlyn is doing poorly, her logs are concerning, but the results came back and her infection isn’t resistant to antibiotics, which means she should slowly start to improve, we just need to be patient,” he informed the fighter, “I’m only asking you to eat some food, stay hydrated, and rest for a few hours. I will be here and I will send someone for you if anything changes.”
“I’ve been here every time she has woken up,” Vi’s voice quivered, “what if she needs me?”
“Then I will send someone to get you and she will be okay until you get here.”
Vi exhaled softly, looking down at her hands turned upright on her thighs.
“Being here, there’s no place for me to direct my anger when everything gets too overwhelming. I could only fold in on myself. It just… happened,” she confessed. Tobias could see the damage better up close and held a hand out.
“Can I take a closer look?” He asked. Vi didn’t make eye contact still, but lifted her left hand into his. He gently uncurled her fingers and squinted while he observed the wounds. They were deep and raw, and Vi was at risk of a minor infection.
“You need a stitch in the first three wounds at least,” he announced, “and I assume your right hand is much the same?”
“Yeah,” she said softly.
“I can get another doctor to do it if that would make you feel more comfortable?”
“No,” she insisted, “you’re already here, so.”
Tobias released her hand and stood up to return to Caitlyn’s room. Vi stayed in the waiting room for a little while longer feeling both humiliated and warm. Tobias had every reason to hate her. All of this death and misery originated from the actions of her own sister, most notably, the death of Cassandra. If Vi would have left Caitlyn on the bridge that day, maybe everything would have been different. Maybe she could have talked Powder out of it all.
But she didn’t. And now everyone she loved was either dead or hurting. She looked at the damage to her hands one last time before making her way back to Caitlyn’s room.
When she entered, the nurse was finishing up with Caitlyn’s wound care, replacing the old bandages with new ones. Everything was still healing well and Caitlyn’s pain was managed comfortably. Although the enforcer was sickly and feverish, she still looked more like herself than she had in the midst of all the pain.
“Her fever is being stubborn, but it has come down a bit. I’ve requested for ice packs to help,” he informed Vi, putting the clipboard away. He opened the equipment drawers and pulled out a couple of suturing kits, a syringe of clear solution, gloves, gauze, and bandages. He nodded to Vi’s chair, indicating that he wanted her to sit down while he got everything ready.
She sat down and started to remove the bandages that remained on her forearms. She sees her arms bare frequently enough, but this time she felt different, as if she didn’t feel the want or need to wrap her arms again. The events of the past week had changed her. Maybe she didn’t want to be a fighter anymore.
Tobias lifted a small table from the corner of the room and placed it carefully in front of Vi and then carried his own chair over. He washed his hands thoroughly in the bathroom and then slipped the gloves on. Vi watched him open all the kits and line everything up.
“The ship still hasn’t arrived so I can’t numb the area,” he confessed, “will you be okay?”
Vi nodded. She had sutured herself in the past, so things had been worse. Tobias taped on the table, requesting one of her hands. She put her left hand on the table, facing upwards. He carefully straightened her fingers and she gritted her teeth at the skin pulling. He grabbed the water-filled syringe and cleaned the four wounds before starting the process of suturing.
They sat in silence for most of it, Tobias asking if she was okay from time to time. Once the three open wounds on her left hand were sutured, one stitch in each, he applied some medicated cream and then laid a small sheet of gauze down before wrapping her hand.
When she put her right hand up, he discovered that she only needed stitches in two of the wounds. He continued the process, again, asking from time to time if she was okay. After he wrapped her right hand, he pulled all the waste together and disposed of it.
“Thank you,” she said after some time in silence. He gave her a small nod and smile indicating that she was in a safe place with safe people who cared about her.
“The house-keepers are expecting you. Please, let yourself in and make yourself comfortable. Your things will be in Caitlyn’s room, I know she would want you in there. Should there be anything that you need that is not there, just ask them.”
Vi felt strange being offered such services. She wouldn’t ask them for anything, but Tobias listing her as a member of the household made that warm feeling flare again. But she couldn’t shake the feeling of being an intruder in this city at the same time. She didn’t belong here.
“Thanks,” she said again. She stood and touched Caitlyn’s hand before leaning down and planting a kiss on her forehead. The bruising on her forehead and cheek had started to fade from a deep purple to a light purple with yellow on the outskirts. It comforted her to know some things were healing during all of this.
She locked eyes with Tobias one last time and he knew exactly what she was saying.
“I will send someone, I promise,” he assured her.
When Caitlyn opened her eyes, she could see the purple drapes coming from her bed moving with the wind from her window. It was early morning, the orange glow illuminating her room as the sunrose. Her vision was so clear and so
wide
. She instantly reached her hand up and gently touched her left eye. Her eyelid instinctively fliched to the touch to protect her eyeball.
She gasped,
how is that possible?
Next, she pushed her blankets down and lifted her sleep shirt to find that there was no wound in her lower abdomen. She bent her knee up,
no pain
. Her arms and hands were free from IVs.
She was perfectly fine. Was it all just a bad dream?
She got out of bed effortlessly and studied her bedroom as she made her way to the doors. Nothing seemed out of place or different. Through the windows, the city seemed intact and bustling. It was the subtle boom of the Hexgate that made her pause at her doors.
That’s not right, it was destroyed,
she thought to herself.
When she walked through the door, she found herself on the battlefield, the sun blistering down on her. She lifted her gloved hand up to block the glare of the sun and realised she was in her battle gear from
that day
.
“Commander?” She heard a weak voice call out to her. She looked to her left and saw Loris struggle to crawl towards her, arrows protruding from his back and neck, blood endlessly dripping from his mouth. He was reaching for her, begging for her help.
Caitlyn launched herself towards her fellow soldier. She slid on her knees catching his head as he collapsed and gave in to his injuries.
“Loris?” She called, lightly tapping his cheek to get his attention, but his eyes were low and distant. A stare that she had grown familiar with. He was already gone.
“No,” she gasped, her vision blurring with tears. Loris had done so much for her. He had been there since day 1 of the strike team’s assemble. He protected her through many battles. He watched over Vi in Zaun and in Piltover for her. He was one of the most loyal soldiers that she had, “I’m sorry, Loris.”
“Cait!” She heard another voice call out for her. She turned and saw Jayce in the distance.
“Cait, quick! It’s going to take me!”
“Jayce!” She called back, breaking into a sprint.
“Cait!” He cried again. She noticed that his legs had started to disintegrate, disappearing as if they were never there. She tried to run faster, but she couldn’t run fast enough to get to Jayce before his body vanished to dust. He was gone like he was never there in the first place.
“Jayce!” She yelled, searching for him. But she was met with quiet in return.
“Caitlyn.” The next voice sent shivers down her spine. She straightened up before she turned to meet cerulean blue eyes.
Her eyes
.
“Mother?” She exhaled sharply. Cassandra was standing within arms distance, in her council uniform, looking very alive, “am I dead?”
Cassandra shook her head with a small, endearing smile. Caitlyn closed the distance instantly, doing the one thing she wished she had done more when her mother was alive, and embraced her.
“Now you die,” a deep voice hissed in her ear and she felt a sharp pain in her lower abdomen again. She stumbled backward and saw a familiar blade embedded in her. She looked up, panting in pain, and saw Ambessa beginning to tower over her as she got closer.
“Look at what you’ve done, child.” Ambessa grabbed Caitlyn by her jaw and turned her around. Caitlyn felt her back crash against Ambessa behind her, but when she opened her eyes she was overwhelmed with devastation. There were so many bodies. So many dead soldiers that had presumably died in the war. She saw Vander as Warwick before he was resurrected, dead in the field of bodies. She saw bright blue hair with a pink streak peering out from under bodies.
Jinx
. She saw Isha. She saw her mother. She saw so many innocent civilian bodies. All of the deaths that stemmed from her poor decisions, especially the decisions made after her mother’s death that were based on grief and pure hate.
“Look at them all,” Ambessa spat, “all of the
innocent
deaths from your actions. Children, parents, brothers, sisters. How heavy this must feel.”
Heavy was an understatement. Caitlyn was being crushed under the weight of all this devastation. How could she be so naive? She was a clever person, raised to be inquisitive and sharp. But looking out at the mass grave of collateral damage, she became the villain.
She closed her eyes so that she couldn’t see the bodies anymore, but Ambessa tightened her grip on Caitlyn’s jaw, “
Look
. This was your war, Commander Kiramman, not
hers
.”
Caitlyn opened her eyes, tears spilling out as she did. She was overwhelmed with nausea when she saw pink hair in the center of all the bodies. Vi was lying face up, her eyes dull and clouded staring into nothingness, her skin pale and greying. She collapsed from Ambessa’s grasp, her kneecaps hitting the ground harshly.
“This isn’t real,” she exhaled, using her hands to help stand back up. Her legs were shaking, but she had to get to Vi. She stumbled through the bodies until she arrived in front of the fighter. Vi looked so small, her face gaunt, the muscle from her arms and body depleted. She looked starved, malnourished. Smaller than the day that Caitlyn found her in the Stillwater Hold prison cell. She reached down and touched Vi’s face, tears falling from her cheeks.
“
You’re killing her too,
child.”
Caitlyn could feel the rage building inside her chest. She grabbed the blade and ripped it out, turning to impale Ambessa, but the Noxian was faster. In that time, Ambessa had disarmed Caitlyn and used the blade to slit her throat, leaving the enforcer choking as blood poured from her neck. She gripped her right hand over the deep, long cut and used her other arm to crawl closer to Vi’s body. She slumped against the fighter's torso, fear and panic consuming her when she realised she couldn’t breathe anymore. She was suffocating, choking on her blood.
Darkness slowly consumed her vision as she continued to fight for air.
“Caitlyn!” A familiar voice yelled, “Caitlyn, you need to breathe.”
She inhaled sharply, a familiar ceiling mural greeting her. She was back in the hospital.
She coughed aggressively, struggling for air. She could feel a mask being held over her nose and mouth, cool air traveling down to her lungs. When she would catch her breath, another coughing fit would line up to start. She was shivering uncontrollably, feeling a level of cold she had never experienced before, especially around her neck and chest.
“That’s it, daughter,” Tobias exclaimed, relieved. Usually, Vi would announce herself by now, if not verbally than physically, but Caitlyn couldn’t see her with her limited vision and she couldn’t feel her.
After a few minutes, the nurse removed the oxygen mask and left her with just the nasal cannula. She was finally able to look around and noticed that Vi wasn’t in the room. She also noticed that the freezing sensations were coming from ice packs on her.
“What happened?” She asked Tobias, who had been in a low conversation with the doctor right next to her.
“Your oxygen levels dropped fast, you really scared us for a moment, but you’re doing much better now,” he gave a small smile.
She still felt like she had just run laps around Piltover, her breathing still irregular and becoming caught in coughs.
“Where’s Vi?” She asked.
“She’s at home, resting,” Tobias informed her, “I’m going to send someone for her now.”
“No,” Caitlyn interfered, “no, please let her rest.”
“Are you sure? I fear she may become upset when she finds out I didn’t send someone for her.”
Caitlyn released another harsh cough, flinching at the pain that traveled through her skull from her eye socket, proving it was still healing and sensitive.
“Leave her be, please?” She begged, already exhausted. Tobias nodded and took his daughter's hand. She tried to fight the exhaustion that was pulling her back under. All she could see when she closed her eyes was Vi, dead in the sea of bodies.
You’re killing her too, child.
Present tense, though it was Vi’s corpse she was leaning against in the final moment of the nightmare. The darkness proceeded to take over until she finally surrendered to sleep.
You’re killing her too.