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Riri bursts in by vaporizing the meeting room door. “I WIN! I WIN! I WIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!” The little potato blob frolics around their superiors in infectious joy. They were supposed to be in a meeting… but with this news, it’s acceptable.
The entire room heaves a sigh of relief. Hoshino was a difficult one. The executives knew that much. It was evident from her file and even more evident once it was found that their best wizard got attached to her. With the whole stalker debacle and the introduction of Rio as a potential mate, they were skeptical of a success to put it lightly. To make matters worse, Riri has only become unprofessional and violent from long exposure to their client. It made debriefs rather difficult. Humans in general must be getting more uncouth these days. Kate is having similar problems, even sounding like she wants her human to focus on other things besides getting a mate. Bah.
Either way, it's good to hear their gamble (and Riri’s odd insistence) had pulled through.
The Chief Marketing Officer leaned back in their chair. A relaxed smile on their face. “My, who did she end up choosing?”
“Her best friend-!”
Oh, the easy mode one? That was unexpected. Most of the chairs had placed their bets on the handsome-
“Saki!” Riri cheered.
… What?
Riri continues on. Idiotically explaining how their expert, competent matchmaking was wasted- no- grossly corrupted to cause an even bigger mess. Dates? Real connections? Comfort? Relationship boundaries!? That last one is an oxymoron! What does that matter here? They can’t profit!
They blithely twirl in place. Ignorant of the sudden change in atmosphere. “It took me so long to finally figure it out, but the answer was so simple! I can’t believe you guys missed it. Oh! And I got to tell R&D about this! They’ll get way better at brainstorming meet cutes and dates and-”
“Stop.” The CEO massages a growing headache. “Riri, this won’t help Japan’s declining birth rate.”
“Wha-? Why?”
It’s the Technical Manager’s turn and they just shake their head. “Two humans of the same gender can’t make a baby.”
“Huh? Eeh, well, then one of them can just change into a boy for a little bit right?” Riri looks to their bosses with apprehension, hope and other gross human emotions.
“Humans can’t do that very easily.” A real shame. It would have made finding potential partners much easier on their clients. As it is, the unspoken rule for client’s mates is: No sterile mates (this often includes mates of the same gender). The technical manager tells Riri as such.
Riri just broke one of those rules… two technically since they were a potential mate. As a non-human wizard from another world, they physically can’t make offspring.
Riri, for their part, has the decency to look ashamed. Something unreadable flickering beneath their expression. “...But, they’re in love?”
They’re ashamed for the wrong reason.
The CEO speaks again. “Riri, we don’t make money from love. You know this.”
“Yeah?! Well- well-“
Oh boy, another threat. Like that worked so well for the wizard last time. Really, would have never sent Riri to that girl if they knew how unwieldy they would have become.
“-I’m going to release Anzu here!”
“What?!” Bring her here?! To this particular other world? What, like as a new employee? As a new employee right?
“I’m not even going to run her over, she’ll ride shotgun! Let's see how the magical world likes two way trips and the power for friendship!”
So not as a new employee. Hoshino as a demon of destruction. That’s going to be bad for the company.
“Wait, Riri, let's not be rash.”
It was too late, the wizard had already stolen the keys to a truck-kun.
“Get in the truck Anzu, I need you to be gay and do crimes!”
“Err, I think I hear my girlfriend calling-”
“I’ll give you another cat jacket and a sword.”
She buckles in. “Say less.”