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Spitting in my face wasn’t part of the plan. It’s a nice touch though.
The immediate aftermath of their reunion was just as tense as where they had left it.
For months, Caitlyn had wondered and worried about what it would be like if they saw each other again. If. She had tried not to fool herself - she was fully aware there was no guarantee that their paths would cross again. After many nights of reflection, she had come to the conclusion that if she, herself, had been scorned as she had scored Vi, she may never want to see her own face again.
That rang true every single time she saw her own empty, blue eyes staring back at her in the mirror.
Fate, whether merciful or torturous as it was, deemed that not to be the case. After months of grief and suffering, Caitlyn had found herself overlooking Vi once again. She hadn’t even recognized her at first. She had been preoccupied with keeping an eye on Singed that all she saw was a conspicuous black-haired woman following him back to camp.
Without thinking, she had pounced, with the goal to take the suspect down. Her actions were precise, her combat mirroring the moves that Ambessa had imbued unto her with weeks of training. Within moments, they were on the ground, the suspect - a woman, she quickly realized - pinned beneath her elbow.
It only took another moment for her to realize who it was she caught.
Vi.
Both of their eyes widened slightly in recognition of one another, before narrowing back into their heated gaze. Caitlyn's softer and more apprehensive. Vi’s just as tense and cold as when Caitlyn first met her in Stillwater.
The commander truly did not know what to say. An apology was expected from her and deserved by Vi, of that much she was certain. A long overdue apology that could not truly reveal the full weight of her regret from how she had left things. But she did not know what, and she definitely did not know how to start. So much had changed in the interim, and so much had been done.
Vi hadn’t given her a lot of time to form the words, had she been able to. Instead, she broke the pregnant silence with a sarcastic quip - a tell-tale sign that she, too, was not fully sure of how to approach their meeting.
“On the job, I see,” she said, glancing down at her commander’s uniform before she sneered back up at Caitlyn.
Anger was a safe territory for Vi, Caitlyn knew. But she couldn’t help but scoff and look away from the woman under her, hoping the hurt didn’t show on her face. She let out a few heavy breaths.
“You can’t be here,” she rebutted, not knowing what she truly meant by it. You can’t be here - why are you even down here? You can’t be here - it’s not safe. You can’t be here - I’m not ready to face you yet.
“Oh?” Vi said with a mirthless smirk. “Here, like where I landed when this rich, unhinged mongoose just tackled me?” She sat up, throwing Caitlyn’s arms off of her. Venom dripped from her words, increasing with each insult.
“Mongoose?” Caitlyn questioned, more to herself than anything. Her face was scrunched in confusion. Mongoose?
Vi didn’t look back at her, instead wiping her nose as she caught her breath. Caitlyn’s eyes trailed over her former partner. She had kept most of her muscle, that much was evident from their brief tussle. But despite that, she looked smaller. The lines in her face were more prominent, and even the dark black makeup around her eyes couldn’t hide the bags underneath them. And her hair. Vi’s beautiful red hair that had immediately captivated Caitlyn as soon as it had shown in the Piltover sun was now jet black. She lamented the loss, it really had been so beautiful.
“Your hair,” she said. “You look like… like an angry oil slick.” Angry oil slick? Really? That’s all I can say? Where did that come from?
Oil and water, that’s all we are.
The painful memory bubbled to the surface. Fitting, she supposed. What once hurt so horribly was only the start of her ruin.
And yet, despite everything, Vi let out a wry laugh. “Don’t sugarcoat it,” she replied, glancing back at Caitlyn for just a moment. “Cupcake.”
Caitlyn’s eyes widened. A profound sadness washed over her as the full weight of what she had lost hit her.
Damn it all to hell.
As Caitlyn stood up, she made a decision. Yes, she had messed up. Horribly. Perhaps irreparably. But fate was giving her an opportunity to try. And she was going to fucking try.
Ambessa can go fuck herself.
And so, an hour later, when Vi lunged towards her and spat in her face, it all felt as though it had started to come together. The start of a long journey back to where they had been - where they had come from.
It feels like I am finally finding a way back.
Caitlyn stared hard into Vi’s eyes as the two of them stood, mere inches between their faces. It may have just been a trick of the lighting in Ambessa’s tent, but the powder blue irises seemed to have lost some of their luster, she noted. They were paler than they had been before.
There was pain in her gaze. Unresolved anger and despair, and Caitlyn could feel all of that behind the supposedly offensive gesture.
Without speaking, she reached up to wipe away the spit from her cheek with the back of her gloved hand. Instead of clearing it off her face however, Caitlyn smeared it down her jawline and across her lips instead, keeping her eyes locked on Vi’s the entire time. A gesture, to share between the two of them. Caitlyn could only pray that the woman before her recognized what she was trying to say.
I know. I accept this.
And she knew that Vi understood as she watched Vi’s eyes widen a fraction as her tongue darted out across her lips, wiping the saliva she had just smeared across them.
She tastes the same.
Vi tasted the same as she had, six months ago. Caitlyn struggled to hold her expression, to keep the facade in place before she gave it all away. She had stayed the same - she hadn’t changed. Sure, her hair was black (angry oil slick), and her makeup was darker, and her edges were harder and sharper, but underneath that all, she was the same.
She hadn’t changed.
Not like me.
Caitlyn took a deep breath and took a step back.
“It’s time,” rasped Singed from behind her. She turned to look at Ambessa, a question on her lips, but found herself unable to speak under the warrior’s stony gaze. Caitlyn feared that if she opened her mouth, she would give it all away.
Ambessa was a cunning tactician. She could read the room as if it were a book laid out before her, and the occupants the words on the page. This entire plan that had been thought up was banking on the woman not catching on too soon, and there were so many opportunities to give it all away.
Thankfully, the Noxian seemed none the wiser to the ruse that was currently taking place. She simply nodded her head towards Singed as the alchemist lumbered out of the tent, a silent order to follow him and enact their own plan.
Caitlyn nodded, and set her rifle down on the rack. The action left her feeling naked, but there was no need for her to take it anyways. Vi had assured her that Jinx - really, Jinx - would be watching over her. She had no choice but to place her trust in her, a trust that was well earned and long overdue.
The truth was, if she could have, she would have given up as soon as she realized that it was Vi in the crevice. She had been so close to breaking down and losing herself then. The only reason she was still even pretending was because of her. That beast was Vi’s father, Vander. She had not been told much about him, sparse bits of history here and there. But she knew what she meant to Vi.
I need to do this. This is my way back.
Caitlyn was fully aware that she owed Vi a long and deep apology. She owed her more than that. If the last half a year had imbued anything in her, it was that she did not deserve this shot at a second chance. But she would be a fool not to take it.
The commander had thought that abandoning Vi would stem some of her grief, but she had never been so wrong in her entire life. Leaving Vi behind had only added to her grief - a grief that had not dulled throughout the following months. It had left her feeling hollow and empty and numb.
She was not proud of the efforts she made to fill the empty void in her soul that Vi had left behind. The choices she had made in the aftermath of two brutal losses were not in her character, and in retrospect, she could admit that. Caitlyn had sought control in a scene where control was spiraling away from her. She sought comfort in a time where nothing was comforting her. And she sought conflict to try and find a solution to a problem of her own making.
And Maddie.
Caitlyn sighed as she watched Singed set up the cage for Vander.
Fuck, Maddie. I’m so fucking sorry.
Another apology on her long list of reconciliation. Maddie had been an easy source of comfort. The young enforcer had followed her around and clung to her in the days following her promotion. Caitlyn hadn’t even realized it before things had gotten physical, and Maddie was lying in her bed underneath her.
It was another outlet for control, she supposed. But it didn’t make her feel anything. And perhaps that was the worst part.
“What do I mean to you?” Maddie had asked one night, after Caitlyn had left her undone, splayed out on her silk sheets. “What does this mean to you?”
“I don’t know,” she had replied honestly.
Maddie raised herself, propped her body up on her elbows as she sheets fell away from her. Caitlyn’s gaze trailed down her body, barely recognizing it.
“You… treat me…” Maddie began, and Caitlyn’s focus lifted back to the other woman’s face. She wore an uncertain expression. “You treat me like I’m everything. But you never let me treat you the same way,” the younger woman finally finished. “You always pull away and go back into that shell of yours.” She sat up further, leaning in close. “What’s it like in there? What do you keep inside that prevents you from coming back?”
Caitlyn hadn’t answered her, words failing her as Maddie pressed her body up to hers, skin on skin. Maddie had stolen a kiss then, not the first they had shared, and not the last. But as always, Caitlyn hadn’t felt anything from it.
And it didn’t taste right. It didn’t taste like you.
With a pang in her chest, Caitlyn licked her lips again. The taste of Vi was faint, but it was still there. It grounded her as she followed Singed back into the encampment. It filled the gaping wound in her heart that Maddie never could - a miracle for such a small, little thing to fill an emptiness so large. A testament, perhaps, to what she had lost.
A testament to what she could maybe have again.
As if the decision had not been made from the moment she saw Vi again, Caitlyn vowed to give her all towards making things right. The swarm of grief and angst in her chest had loosened when she laid eyes on her, sharp edges and black hair and all. From the moment “cupcake” had fallen from Vi’s lips, just as sweet as the first time she had heard it, Caitlyn had come completely undone.
She would make any effort needed. Apologize a thousand times over just to hear Vi say it again. To hold Vi again. To kiss her - to taste her again.
Vi was everything she had been missing for six months. Vi filled the part of her that had been empty for so long. And she was so unfathomably dense to think the opposite - to assume her attachment to Vi was a factor in her grief.
Caitlyn clenched her fists as Singed led her into the greenhouse. She caught a glint of pink in the distance, and an odd feeling washed over her as she readied herself for what was about to happen. An omen that would once send cold dread shooting through her veins now filled her with conviction.
For Vi.
Jinx would need to fight harder for her forgiveness, and perhaps she would never grant it. But right now, at this very moment, they needed to work together. Caitlyn trusted Vi, and for whatever it was worth, Vi trusted Jinx. However misplaced it may be, it was necessary for them to pull this off.
And so, Caitlyn steeled her gaze.
This is it.
The commander wrapped her arms around Singed, yanking him away from Vander.
This is my way back.
It wasn’t hard to subdue the alchemist. His body was weak and frail from years of abusive experimentation. She had him on the ground in under a minute, allowing her to turn back to the beast.
Vi’s father.
“Vi sent me,” she whispered, crouching down beside him. Her hands hovered over the thick fur of his back, eyes glancing over the various metal protrusions before she hesitantly pressed down to try and rouse him. “I’m going to get you out of here.”
He didn’t wake, aside from a soft grunt. Caitlyn looked around the small greenhouse, trying to plan her way out of here. There had not really been much of an escape plan, just a rendezvous point for them to all meet once their parts had been played. Having never faced the best that Vander had become, Caitlyn hadn’t known what to expect.
She hadn’t expected to be swept backwards and off her feet by a fist connecting with her jaw either.
Caitlyn cried out in pain as she fell against the floor, barely even having time to register the explosion of pain in her face before she was being lifted up into the air. Blinking the stars from her vision, Caitlyn was able to make out the large form of Rictus glaring at her as he raised her up by the neck.
“Ambessa believed in you,” he growled as he tightened his grip on her throat. Caitlyn struggled, her lungs tightening as her airway was cut off. Her fingers clawed at the massive hands choking her, but the Noxian’s grip was firm and only grew tighter as she squirmed in the air. “Your death will be a deep cut.”
Just as an inky blackness began to creep into Caitlyn’s vision, the glass ceiling of the greenhouse exploded in a flash of blue light, and her body was unceremoniously dropped to the floor. She scrambled away, struggling to catch her breath as the familiar clamor of combat filled the confined space, flashes of pink and blue barrelling against the green glow of Rictus’ arcane defense
Jinx.
Caitlyn’s eyes widened as she recognized the terrorist. She had of course known that Jinx was here, in the sanctuary. She had a sneaking suspicion that Vi’s sister would be watching her. However, she would have never guessed that it would have been Jinx that came to her defense.
The younger girl was giving the fight her all. Flashing around with her shimmer-enhanced abilities and striking against Rictus ruthlessly. She didn’t appear to be making a dent in the hulking man’s defenses, but she was slippery - or so she thought.
Suddenly, Jinx was yanked out of the air and thrown to the ground. Caitlyn froze, her body unresponsive. Her mind was in conflict. Someone before her was in danger, but that someone was Jinx. A terrorist. A murderer. Her mother’s killer.
But she was also Vi’s sister. A daughter.
The anger inside of her that she expected to feel was not present. But it should be there. Was her longing for Vi and her grief at her loss really that much greater than her hatred for Jinx? Caitlyn couldn’t move. Her body wouldn’t respond, even as Rictus towered over her lithe form - she looked so small - his weapon raised and ready to strike. Her mouth opened, to scream or call out or cry - Caitlyn didn’t know what.
The blade cleaved downwards, and Caitlyn looked away, unable to watch. But the killing blow never came, and instead only the ring of metal against metal echoed in the greenhouse.
“ Don’t. Touch. My. Daughter. ” growled Vander, suddenly between Jinx and Rictus. And then, with a swing of his arm Rictus was sailing right through the glass wall behind him.
There was a moment's pause as everyone in the greenhouse took a breath. Caitlyn’s eyes never left Jinx, however, watching the younger woman like a hawk as she stood up and bruised herself off before throwing her arms around Vander. Jinx’s eyes found her’s and Caitlyn found hereslf glaring back.
“You,” she spat, unable to hold her tongue any longer. She threw as much contempt as she could into the word, but it didn’t even feel all that real to her as Jinx glanced over her shoulder at her.
There was no coldness in her gaze - no pink glow in her eye. And Caitlyn didn’t know how that made her feel. She looked like an entirely different person was standing before her, pressed up against her father’s chest, her arms stretched as far as they could go. They didn’t even reach halfway around the large beast’s torso, and Caitlyn couldn’t push away the pang of emotion in her heart, as off-putting as it was.
She’s right there. I can get her.
The door to the greenhouse slammed open, and Caitlyn’s head swung to the entry, fearing the worst. But instead of an angry Ambessa standing in the doorway, there was only Vi, eyes wide in worry before they settled on Jinx and Vander and softened slightly.
The young child - Caitlyn still hadn’t learned her name - raced around Vi and rushed over to Jinx, throwing her arms around the lithe woman in a tight hug. Jinx smiled lovingly down at her, the emotion looking foreign on her face in Caitlyn’s eyes, and patted the brightly-painted helmet on her head.
Her former partner sauntered over to the group, then, and their eyes met. Vi’s gaze radiated reassurance, grounding Caitlyn’s spiraling mind. She knew that there was probably a myriad of discontent in her gaze - apprehension, fear, confusion. But all Vi did was gaze down at her for a moment and then offer her a small smile. As if to say, “It’s all okay.”
Oh, wow.
Her heart melted at Vi’s smile. The tense spool of negative emotions that had been steadily climbing inside of her ever since she had laid eyes on Jinx swiftly unraveled. A warmth filled her heart as she watched the woman join the family hug, a rare, true smile still on her face. And in that moment, Caitlyn realized that maybe, perhaps, she had been wrong about everything. Maybe it was all okay.
There was time to sort out her conflicted feelings later. For now, she could breathe and rest, if only for a moment. The chaos of the past few months could wait just a moment more.
This is it.
Caitlyn stood up, an aching inside of her to join the embrace, even for a moment. To feel Vi in her arms again - to be held by her. Perhaps this could be her family too.
This was my way back.
She took a step forward, and then all hell broke loose.