Chapter Text
The door to Vi’s apartment slammed open, rattling the crooked hinges as she stumbled in, unintentionally leaving the door half-ajar behind her. The sound reverberated through the tiny, dimly lit space though not nearly loud enough to drown out her thoughts. She staggered forward, the weight of the night pressing down on her painfully. The adrenaline from the bar fight had long since burned away, leaving only the biting ache of her bruised ribs and the sting of bloodied knuckles. Her breath came in ragged bursts, each inhale sharp and shallower than the last.
She leaned heavily against the wall, dragging a hand down her face, fingers brushing against the sweat-damp skin. The room spun as Vi struggled not to collapse. Everything felt sharper, louder, the edges of her reality clawing at her senses. The bruises from the fight throbbed with each uneven breath, but the ache in her body was nothing compared to the violent thoughts raging inside her.
“I care, Vi. Even after everything”
Vi pushed off the wall, the motion sending a jolt of pain through her ribs. She stumbled forward, catching herself on the cracked sink to the left of the room. The mirror above it was clouded with grime, but beneath the smudges, she could make out her own reflection—hollow eyes ringed with fatigue, the shadow of old scars crisscrossing her cheekbone, the fresh split in her lip that still trickled red. Her hair was unrecognisable, dyed jet black instead of the vibrant pink it once was. Smeared with black paint that covered most of her face, so dark it looked like oil. It streaked her cheeks, dark and unforgiving, Vi was surprised Caitlyn even recognised her.
Vi’s jaw clenched as her reflection stared back, accusing and pitiless. She looked hollow. Empty even. A wandering body with no soul or purpose. What did Caitlyn think now that she saw the sorry state she was in? The immaculately polished, precise enforcer, who always carried herself with such poise and conviction.
“I came because I heard you were destroying yourself. And judging by the state of you, I wasn’t wrong.”
It shouldn’t matter what Caitlyn thought; it shouldn’t matter at all.
But it did. A twisted part of her still cared, still burned with shame at the thought of Caitlyn’s eyes turning away, filled with disappointment and disgust. Vi’s fists clenched until her knuckles went white. Why did she care so much? Caitlyn had left her to rot. Yet Vi couldn’t bring herself to blame her. You should’ve tried harder. Begged her to stay longer.
It stung more than any of her injuries. Vi was faintly aware Caitlyn would never look at her the same way again, not after tonight. Vi let out a shuddering breath as she squeezed her eyes shut, forbidding any tears from leaking out.
She pushed herself away from the sink and staggered forward towards her bed, every bone in her body aching. She was exhausted, both physically and emotionally. A part of her knew she didn’t really deserve to rest. But Vi had always been selfish, always pushing, always demanding. Too often. Too much. Why do you think she left you?
Before she reached the edge of the mattress, the world around her blurred, and her vision darkened. Before she could stop it, her knees buckled, and she crumpled onto the cold wooden floor. Her knees screamed in agony as it met the hard wooden planks, breath caught in her throat. She fell forward, pathetic and sprawled across the floor. She tried to find the strength to get up. But it was gone. She was too tired. And, maybe, she thought as her pulse drummed in her ears, she didn’t even care anymore.
The door burst open behind her, and a familiar voice rang out, sharp with urgency. Caitlyn? Vi’s vision spun, barely aware of the rush of footsteps before everything went dark.
- - - - -
Caitlyn fingers hesitated just inches from Vi’s half-open door as guilt gnawed at her. Fuck what was she even doing here? Caitlyn groaned before she stepped back, pacing back and forth. Was Vi okay? Cleary not. Should she knock? Cailtyn knew she was the last person Vi wanted to see then but every inch of her being screamed at her to rush in and gather Vi battered body in her arms. To beg for forgiveness on her knees and apologise for everything wrong she did.
Coming here now felt like an intrusion, like she was overstepping into a life Vi clearly didn’t want her in anymore. For good reason too. Cailtyn would never forgive her had she been in Vi’s position.
But something had pulled her here anyway—an ache in her chest, a voice in her head that told her that if she did, she’d live the rest of her life in regret, never being able to see Vi again.
Caitlyn inhaled sharply, summoning whatever courage she had left in her. Her knuckles hovered over the wood, poised to knock, when the distinct thump of a body crashing to the floor broke the silence.
Her heart lurched, and she slammed the door open, "Vi?"
The sight before her made her stomach drop.
Vi was sprawled on the floor near the overturned couch, blood trailing from a gash above her brow, her hands raw and dried blood peeling. Her breathing was shallow, her chest rising and falling unevenly. The room was in disarray—broken furniture, shattered glass, and a trail of blood smearing the floor as if Vi had tried to pull herself up and failed. Her heart clenched painfully, how had Vi been living like this?
"Vi!" Caitlyn rushed forward, dropping to her knees beside her. Her hands hovered uncertainly over Vi’s body, unsure where her hands were welcome. "Oh, no, no, no... Vi what have you done to yourself?"
The rage that had fueled her confrontation at the bar had long since burned out, leaving behind crushing guilt and worry. She had done this. She had pushed Vi to this edge, and now she was staring down the wreckage.
Vi’s eyes fluttered open for a brief moment, unfocused and glassy. She muttered something incoherent before slipping back into unconsciousness.
Caitlyn felt her pulse quicken. "Hey- Hey Stay with me, Vi," she felt unwelcome tears rise to her eyes, blurring her vision. "You’re going to be okay."
Glancing around, Caitlyn spotted a stained towel hanging off the edge of the kitchen counter. She grabbed it, pressing it gently to the wound on Vi’s head to staunch the bleeding. She’d had little medical training, but she’d seen enough injuries in her time with the Enforcers to know basic first aid.
As she worked, her mind raced. What had happened to Vi? She had always been self-destructive, but this… this was different. Caitlyn tried not to break down as she caressed a hand to Vi’s paint smeared cheek, running a finger over her VI tattoo. Vi’s eyes were swollen from this close, face bruised black and blue under the grime and blood. Fuck. Just what did Cailtyn do to her? It was her fault. She had left her here alone.
"I’m so sorry," Caitlyn whispered, her throat tight as tried her best to wipe the filth gently off Vi's face, propping her head up with a pillow from the couch. The antiseptic clearly stung, and Vi stirred, a soft groan escaping her lips. Caitlyn froze, her breath catching. "I’m so sorry I made you go through this."
In the harsh overhead light, the bruises scattered across her body seemed impossibly dark. They covered her arms, her ribs, her legs—fresh purples and blues overlapping older yellows and greens. Cuts and scrapes lined her knuckles, shoulders, and jaw.
Words couldn't describe how absolutely horrible Cailyrn felt in that moment. Vi’s familiar muscled frame had thinned, her stomach leaner than they’d ever been—too lean. Her collarbones jutted out sharply, shadowed against her skin, and her cheeks had lost their fullness. It was all wrong, so wrong.
She spent the next hour tending to Vi as best she could, cleaning her wounds with trembling hands and wrapping what she could with strips of fabric torn from a clean shirt she found in the pile of laundry on the floor.
“Cupcake...?”
Caitlyn froze, her chest tightening painfully as Vi’s eyes fluttered open. For a brief moment, they locked onto her, glassy and unfocused, muddled with the effects of chemicals and alcohol but then they filled with tears. Caitlyn’s breath caught and her heart twisted painfully at the sight of Vi’s face crumpling.
“I... I can’t do this,” Vi murmured, her voice cracking as tears spilled down her bruised cheeks. Her newly banged hand reached out, but they fell back limply against her sides. “You’re not- you’re not real... You’re never real anymore.”
Caitlyn's breath caught. She reached out instinctively, catching one of Vi’s trembling hands in hers, squeezing it firmly as her own tears surfaced to her eyes. I did this. “I’m real, Vi. It’s me. I’m here. I’m sorry.”
But Vi just shook her head, her body curling in on itself. "No- no, you’re just in my head again. You always leave. You always—" Her voice broke.
“Vi, no.” Caitlyn felt her throat tighten, tears threatening to fall as she leaned closer, desperate to reach her. She gently cupped Vi’s face, forcing her to look up. “Look at me. Please, just look at me. I’m here. I’m not leaving. I swear.”
Vi loses consciousness before either of them could say another word.
---
Morning came with the soft light of dawn filtering through the grimy windows. Vi stirred, her body aching in ways that told her she'd pushed herself too far yet again. She groaned softly to herself as her senses returned. Slowly she became aware of the warm weight of a blanket draped over her and the faint scent of lavender lingering in the air. Cupcake?
Her eyes snapped open, and there she was. Caitlyn sat in the rickety chair beside the couch, her enforcer uniform dishevelled, her head resting against the wall as she dozed lightly.
For a moment, Vi just stared, the memory of the night before flooding back. The fight. The bar. Caitlyn’s voice cutting through the chaos. And now… this.
Caitlyn’s eyes fluttered open, and she straightened, wincing as her neck protested the awkward angle she'd been sleeping in. Their gazes met, and for a heartbeat, neither of them spoke.
"You look like hell," Caitlyn finally said, voice soft.
Vi glared at her warily, though it turned into a wince as the movement pulled at her bruised ribs. "Feel like it too."
Caitlyn’s expression shifted, "You scared me, Vi," she said quietly. "When I saw you at that bar…" She trailed off, her voice breaking slightly.
Vi looked away, her jaw tightening. "Why’d you come here, Cait?"
Caitlyn hesitated, as if choosing her words carefully. "Because I couldn’t stay away," she admitted. "I thought I could—thought it was the right thing to do—but seeing you like that…" She shook her head. "I never wanted this for you. For us."
“You’re just here to say sorry,” Vi tried to force her voice into an irritated, unaffected tone, but the pain in it was unmistakable. Her hand rested limply on the blanket Caitlyn had draped over her, her fingers twitching as though she wanted to grip something—anything. “But we both know it doesn’t change anything.”
Caitlyn swallowed, her throat tight. “Vi, I—”
“Don’t,” Vi interrupted, shaking her head. “I don’t think you really mean it but you and I both know I’d still forgive you. Every time. Because I love you—god, Cait, you don’t know how much I hate myself for it.”
Caitlyn tried not to break down in front of her. “Vi- I love you too please," she said. "I know. And I’m sorry, Vi. For all of it. For walking away, for not seeing what this would do to you. But I see now that I was wrong. You were right Vi, always were. I was consumed by grief, by rage. I failed to see what I had in front of me until I pushed you away too."
Vi turned back to her, her blue eyes sharp despite the exhaustion etched across her face. "You think an apology fixes this?"
"No," Caitlyn said quickly, leaning forward, her hands clasped tightly in her lap. "But I had to say it anyway. I'm so sorry, Vi. I can’t lose you. I don’t expect forgiveness but seeing you like this—it kills me."
Vi’s throat tightened, and she looked away again, her hands clenching into fists. "I don’t know how to come back from this, Cait," she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. "I don’t even know who I am anymore."
Caitlyn reached out, her fingers brushing against Vi’s. "Then let me help you figure it out," she said softly. "I’ll do better. Please. I won’t leave you again. Not now. Not ever"
For a long moment, Vi didn’t respond. She stared at their hands, Caitlyn’s pristine pale fingers against her bruised and battered ones. Topside and down. Oil and water. Slowly, she let out a shaky breath and nodded. Because she was weak. Always had been for Caitlyn.
"Okay," she said. "But don’t expect me to make this easy."
Caitlyn let out a soft breath as Vi’s words settled between them. Okay. It wasn’t forgiveness, not even close, but it was enough to ignite a flicker of something in Caitlyn’s chest.
“I wouldn’t dream of it,”
“Fuck,” Vi whispered, her voice breaking as her resolve crumbled. She closed her eyes, a tear slipping down her cheek. “I hate that I still love you.”
Caitlyn’s breath hitched, and she reached up, cupping Vi’s face gently in her hands. Her thumb brushed away the tear on Vi’s cheek, her touch feather-light but grounding. “And I love you, Vi. Always.”
For a moment, neither of them moved. Then, slowly, Vi leaned forward, her head tilting slightly as if testing the waters. It was definitely not the time for it, but Caiyltn would never refuse Vi. Not when she wanted her that badly. Caitlyn met her halfway, their lips brushing softly in an almost tentative kiss, hesitant, but gods was it perfect.
It wasn’t a lot. But it was a start.