Chapter Text
Genma grumbled as he sat down for breakfast, his brain running a mile per minute. He woke up at around two in the morning, and Ranma was nowhere to be found. He never came to bed in the dojo, and when Genma searched the house, he couldn't find him. The only places he hadn't checked was the bedrooms; he wanted to avoid waking anyone so they could make their escape.
Surely his son wouldn’t be sleeping with one of Soun’s daughters. His friend would have a conniption and kick them out…
Hmm… Maybe that was the play here. Imply heavily that Ranma was… taking advantage of the Tendo hospitality… Unfortunately, It would probably mean the engagement would be over. Genma sighed. He had been looking forward to retiring here, but it was hard to relax with no head.
Oh well. The Tendos weren’t the only family to whom he had engaged Ranma. There were other options.
He tucked into his breakfast. Tonight, they were gone. He’d knock Ranma out and drag him out over his shoulder if he had to. But if he was going to avoid his wife, they had to go now before something prevented it.
Akane joined the breakfast table, greeting her father and Kasumi. He noticed that she didn’t say “good morning” to him, but that was fine. She had a hell of an attitude with him ever since they arrived. At least Ranma hadn’t ended up engaged to her…
“Did you ever find Mom’s address book last night Kasumi?” Akane asked.
Kasumi sighed. “No, it’s not where I thought it would be.”
Soun perked up. “Her address book? I believe it might be in the attic. There was a box of her things that I put together after she passed. I can help you look later if you like.”
Kasumi smiled. “Thank you, Father, that would be appreciated.”
Soun returned her smile. “So why did you—”
Before Soun could finish his question, Ranma and Nabiki came down from her bedroom hand in hand. Well, that explained why he couldn’t find Ranma last night. He was honestly somewhat impressed; he had no idea his son was such a smooth operator.
Nabiki had a wide grin on her face. “Dad, Saotome-san,” she said. “Ranma and I were talking last night, and uhh…” She turned to him, and somehow her smile grew wider. “He asked me to marry him, and I said yes!”
Soun smiled. “Well! That’s very nice, I suppose,” he said chuckling. “I don’t know why since you were already engaged, but if you’re happy, then I’m happy!”
Ranma laughed. “Sure, that was kinda more for me if I’m honest. What we wanted to tell you was that we want to get married, like, now.”
Akane and Kasumi let out surprised squeals. Soun looked stunned. “R-really?” he asked. Tears of joy started to stream down his face.
Nabiki nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah!” She looked up at Genma, looking him dead in the eyes. “We’ve fallen in love with each other, and just figured ‘why wait?’”
Genma winced. Ranma had obviously told her last night…
“Well this is wonderful news!” Soun exclaimed. Suddenly his face fell as an idea occurred to him. “You, uhh, you’re not pregnant, are you?”
Nabiki shook her head. “Nope!”
Soun let out a disappointed sigh. “Well, perhaps later.” He stood, hugging the couple. “I’m very happy for you two! We can have a ceremony in the dojo! I’ll call the priest today!” He dashed off to the phone to place the call.
Kasumi was happy for her sister, but confused. “What happened to a Christmas wedding?” she asked.
Nabiki shrugged. “I told you I hadn’t talked to Ranma yet. He didn’t want to wait! I kind of got caught up in his excitement and agreed!” She gave Kasumi a meaningful look, then glanced at Genma.
Kasumi nodded. “I understand.” She clapped her hands together. “Well! I had better get Mother’s kimono out today while you’re at school! We’ll take your measurements when you get home.”
Soun came back from the phone, an excited smile on his face. “The priest said he would be happy to do the ceremony for us! Unfortunately he is busy this weekend, but he can come by the following weekend!”
Akane smirked. “So you can’t get out of our challenge this weekend!”
Ranma rolled his eyes, but he was laughing.
Genma grumbled as the Tendos and his son excitedly made wedding plans. No way in hell was he going to be able to drag Ranma away from here now. Even if he did, his son would figure out some way to get back to his wife.
He weighed just coming clean and telling Ranma about the contract he signed before they left on their trip, but he figured ignorance was bliss. If Ranma didn’t remember the contract, then he could have whatever good memories he had left of his mother, without the tarnish of her insanity.
Seriously, how did he not see how insane Nodoka was when he married her? To force him to suggest a death contract just so she would agree to a little decade-long training trip with his six-year-old son. How dare she make him do that!
Well, then all he could do was make sure Nodoka didn’t hear about it. Putting his chopsticks down, he excused himself, and snuck up to the attic. If he could find the address book before Kasumi, then Nodoka would just have to live with pictures of the event after the fact.
“Ranma! We’re going to be late!” Akane yelled from the front hall.
Ranma came down the stairs, tugging at his collar, and shifting his arms uncomfortably in his clothing. “Do I really need to wear this spangly monkey suit?”
Akane chuckled. Ranma was dressed in his skating outfit for their fight. It was a red chinese blouse like he usually liked to wear, but there was a dragon made out of sequins wrapped over his shoulder and around his waist. His pants were black, but clung tightly to his legs. “What are you talking about?” she asked through her giggles. “You look fabulous!”
Ranma groaned. “I don’t know why I couldn’t just kick his ass my way,” he grumbled. “On solid land, preferably.”
Akane shook her head. “You think I want to be dressed like this?” she said, gesturing to her own form. Her outfit was made to attractively oppose his—white with blue butterflies and a frilly waist—but it was more like a leotard. “The challenge was made as a Martial Arts Figure Skating battle, so that’s what we have to do!”
Ranma sighed. “Let’s just get this over with.” He pulled his shoes on. “Where’s Nabiki?”
“She said she had something to do and that she’d meet us at the rink,” Akane replied. She grabbed her skates. “Now come on!”
The pair rushed out the door, running towards the rink along the fences and walls next to the road. They kept up a decent pace, making sure not to tire themselves out too much before their battle.
As they approached the rink, they saw Nabiki waving at them near the entrance. Despite the warm day, she was wearing a full trench coat, covering her from neck to knee. Her companion, however, attracted the most attention. “Hey Nabiki,” Akane greeted. “What’s with the dog?”
The large white dog sitting next to her turned and chewed on an itchy spot on his back. Ranma grinned widely. “Soichiro!” he exclaimed, getting down on his knees.
Soichiro obviously knew who Ranma was as well, as the dog got down into a play stance, wagging his tail, before he jumped into Ranma's outstretched arms. The two of them wrestled, excitedly laughing and barking as they played.
Nabiki chuckled at her fiancé’s antics. “Soichiro belongs to the landlady of that apartment building near our school. Ranma stops to say ‘hi’ whenever we walk past.”
Akane couldn’t help but giggle as Ranma and Soichiro rolled around on the ground. “So why is he with you?” she asked.
“Godai-san is having her baby today!” Nabiki replied. “She asked if I wouldn’t mind walking him and feeding him. I guess the kid that lives there is at his grandparents’ house this week, or he’d do it.” She looked down at Ranma. “I didn’t know you were a dog person.”
Ranma and Soichiro broke apart, the former giving the latter one last pet on the head before standing up. “Yeah!” he said cheerfully. “They’re a lot better than… than other pets…” He blushed, absently scratching at the back of his head.
Soichiro scratched at his neck too. Nabiki and Akane laughed.
Nabiki stepped closer to Ranma, brushing white dog hair off of his shirt. “All right. Get in there and kick some ass!” she said, before standing on her toes and kissing him. Ranma automatically wrapped his arms around her waist, deepening the kiss.
Akane made gagging noises at them, giggling when they broke apart.
Nabiki rolled her eyes at her sister. “Go defend Ryoga’s honor,” she teased.
Akane shuddered. “Don’t remind me!” She sighed. “But it’s a martial artist’s duty to protect the weak.” She grinned mischievously.
Nabiki watched as the pair walked in together. She clutched at the collar of her coat as if she was cold. They could win, she was sure of it. Unfortunately, between school and wedding planning, she knew Ranma hadn’t had time to learn how to skate.
She looked down at Soichiro. “So, should we get inside?”
Soichiro scratched an itch.
“THERE IT IS! THE TERRIBLE COUPLE CLEAVER: THE GOODBYE WHIRL!”
Nabiki sighed in disappointment as her sister and her fiancé were lifted up and spun around by the other couple. The fight had started off pretty good; Ranma had figured out how to skate well enough that he was able to move in a straight line at a surprising speed and he had been able to get a really good body blow in against Mikado. Unfortunately, it also made his attacks predictable, and the Golden Pair were able to counterattack with their finishing move.
Thankfully, Ranma seemed to have a stronger grip than their usual victims, and managed to keep from letting Akane fly uncontrollably into the wall. That is, until Azusa got too dizzy herself, and let go of both of them.
Nabiki winced as Ranma slammed into the wall, then again when Akane slammed into him. Well, time for Plan B…
Working the buttons on her trench coat, Nabiki threw it off, revealing her own skating outfit underneath. While Akane’s contrasted Ranma’s, her’s matched him: a red leotard with a dragon snaking over her shoulder. She reached over the boards, holding out her hand towards the dazed pair. “Akane! Tag me in!”
Akane looked up, her head swaying slightly. “Huh?”
“Substitution!” Nabiki said. “Tag me in!”
Akane could barely understand what was going on; she missed the worst of the damage from the fall thanks to Ranma putting himself between her and the wall, but she was still extremely dizzy; she was honestly surprised she hadn’t hurled yet. Wavering, she held out her hand until Nabiki slapped her palm, before collapsing to the ice.
Nabiki leapt over the boards, landing on the blades of her skates, doing a small pirouette in place, and adding a flourish of her hand over her head. She struck up a pose. “In the name of the moon, I’ll punish you!”
“That was a little corny,” Ranma groaned from his back on the ice.
Nabiki smirked. “I thought we agreed we liked corn.”
Ranma shook his head, combing his hands through his hair, and rising to his knees. “Only in the bedroom,” he countered.
Nabiki chuckled. “You don’t mind that I took over for Akane, do you?” she asked. “Figured it was only fair since we’re getting married next week.”
Ranma made it to his feet. “You sure? You’re not exactly a martial artist.”
“Yeah, and you can help me with that later,” she promised. “But you reminded me of something recently: Our school is called ‘Anything Goes’.” Skating back over to the wall, she reached over, and grabbed something. Turning back to the ice, she raised her hand over her head, and calling out. “Oh A-zu-sa!” she sang. “Lookie what I have!”
Azusa shook her head to clear the last of her dizziness. She looked up to see her opponent had changed, and she was holding a leash over her head.
“Bouf!” said Soichiro, leaping up and putting his forepaws on the top of the wall. He had a big doggie grin on his face as he surveyed the rink.
Azusa gasped. Hearts appeared in her eyes, and she clasped her hands under her chin. “Jacques!” she shouted in delight, skating hard towards the dog.
Nabiki quickly stepped out of the way as Azusa skidded to a stop in front of Soichiro. Showing a great deal of strength, she lifted the large dog up over the boards, and spun around holding him tightly. “Oh Jaques, I love you! I'm so glad you are here!”
Ranma unsteadily skated up to Nabiki. “That’s your plan? Now we need to rescue him!” Absently he scratched at his neck.
Nabiki chuckled darkly. “Oh, Soichiro has all the help he needs right now.”
Azusa hummed a happy tune as she spun around, hugging and stroking Soichiro. “Such a big fluffy puppy!” she exclaimed. She lifted him up, rubbing her face in his tummy fur. “So fuzzy and cute!”
Mikado skated up to her. “Just where did you get that mongrel?” he sighed.
Azusa pulled her face from Soichiro’s fur, glaring at Mikado. “Jacques is not a mongrel,” she growled. “He’s obviously a purebred Samoyed!”
“Bowf!” agreed Soichiro.
Mikado suddenly recoiled, grimacing.“Uh, Azusa?” He took a step back. “I think ‘Jacques’ needs a bath.”
Azusa blinked curiously. “Huh?”
Mikado dug in his pocket, pulling out a hand mirror. He held it up for his partner.
Azusa’s eyes bulged as she saw her reflection. It was moving. She screamed, throwing Soichiro away from her, before rushing off the ice, and ran to the locker room.
Ranma caught Soichiro before the poor dog could land on the ice. He made his way over to the boards, leaving the dog on firm ground. Nabiki skated over to make sure her charge was okay. Soichiro looked up at her with a doggie grin, barking happily.
“What was that about?” Ranma asked, scratching his head. “Soichiro didn’t growl or bite her or anything…”
Nabiki chuckled darkly. “Yes, but Soichiro wasn’t out there fighting by himself,” she said. “Godai-san said that his doghouse got infested with bugs, and is being fumigated while they’re out. I’m supposed to give Soichiro a bath.”
Ranma grimaced, scratching desperately at his head. “Is that why I’ve been so itchy?”
Nabiki winced. “Sorry, by the time I could have warned you, you were already wrestling with him. I figured you’d have a shower after the battle anyway…”
“IT LOOKS LIKE AZUSA IS FORFEITING THE MATCH!” cried the announcer. “BUT IT'S NOT OVER YET, FOLKS! MIKADO CAN STILL PULL THIS OFF!”
Mikado growled. No matter. He didn’t need Azusa as his partner, he would just steal his opponent’s. It wouldn’t be the first time…
He lazily skated up to Nabiki, skidding to a stop in front of her. Ranma was still itching desperately at his hair and shaking out his clothes. Plucking a rose from nowhere, he offered it to her. “For you, my dear.”
Nabiki cocked an eyebrow. Did he seriously not remember her from their last meeting? Just how narcissistic can you get? She batted the rose away, then threw a punch right at his nose.
Mikado easily deflected the blow, then used her momentum to drop her into a dip, catching her around the waist before she could hit the ice. “A beautiful woman such as yourself deserves to be on the winning side,” he said, his voice dripping with lust. “Why don’t you join me, and we can celebrate our victory tonight at Morimoto’s.”
Nabiki smirked. She hadn’t expected her punch to land. “¥10,000 and you can walk away without getting your ass kicked.”
Mikado nearly dropped her in surprise. “What?”
Nabiki held out her hand. “You heard me. ¥10,000 or you’ll regret it.”
“My wallet is in my other pants,” Mikado scoffed. He just needed to kiss her and then she’d fall in line. He puckered up, leaned forward, and…
“SAN-ZE-NIN!” came an ominous growl.
Mikado shivered as he felt like someone had just walked over his grave. Nabiki took the opportunity to twist out of his grip, and skate over to her furious fiancée.
Ranma was breathing hard, trying to keep a tenuous grip on his last thread of sanity. “Keep your paws off my fiancée!” he shouted.
Mikado backed away, holding his hands up defensively. “N-now wait a minute! You said your fiancée was that red-haired girl!”
Ranma snarled like a wolf.
Nabiki latched onto his arm, tears streaming from her face. “Oh it was awful!” she cried. “He told me he would take me to a hotel, then take off all my clothes, and then he’d…” she leaned in close, whispering in his ear. Ranma’s aura burned brighter and hotter with each passing second as she described what horrors Mikado has supposedly described to her.
Mikado’s eyes widened as he realized that this was what she was talking about when she asked for a bribe. No, more like protection money. “W-wait! I never!” He started to pat at his pockets. “I-I can pay! I just…”
Without a word, Ranma slammed his fist into the ice. A great crack tore across the surface, raising bergs of ice into the air as they separated from the sheet. Mikado scrambled to get out of the way, but soon found his way blocked by the massive crack in the ice. Ranma’s blow was still coursing though the sheet, “Shit!” He exclaimed. Time for his desperation move. He raised his arms over his head, and began to spin in place.
“HERE IT IS FOLKS!” the announcer yelled, “THE WORLD FAMOUS DANCE OF DEATH! RANMA MAY HAVE THE STRENGTH TO SHATTER THE ICE, BUT CAN HE STAND UP TO MIKADO'S ULTIMATE MOVE?!”
Ranma leaped at his foe, teeth bared, snarling like a wild animal. He was quickly taken up in the whirlwind, thrown around like a rag doll. The sounds of flesh slapping echoed through the arena as blows were struck.
Nabiki winced as she watched Ranma get manhandled. Mikado was capable of something like that? Maybe her plan wasn't so great after all…
Akane skated up beside Nabiki, her eyes glued to the fight. Her lips were moving as if she were muttering to herself. “What? What is it?” Nabiki asked.
Akane shushed her sister, waving her hand at her. “I’m counting,” she said. “He just hit him for the three hundredth time.”
Nabiki gulped. “R-Ranma…”
Akane blinked. “Eh? Oh! No, that’s how many times Ranma has hit Mikado.”
Nabiki burst out laughing. “I knew telling him Mikado was going to take my anal virginity was a step too far.”
Akane grimaced. “Nabiki… You haven’t…”
Nabiki just smiled enigmatically. “No, not yet, but it might be on the table tonight.”
Akane grumbled, making a mental note to put her earplugs in when she went to bed tonight.
Finally Ranma flew away from the spinning Mikado. He landed on his face, skidding along the ice. Unfortunately, he ended up sliding into one of the cracks he’d caused earlier, and into the cold water underneath.
Thinking fast, Nabiki skated hard back to the bench where she had left her trench coat, then made it back just as Ranma was pulling herself from the frigid waters. She wrapped her fiancée in the coat, both warming her, and hiding the transformation from the crowd.
“WELL, IT SEEMS THAT RANMA HAS MADE IT TO HIS FEET, BUT WHAT ABOUT MIKADO?”
Mikado had stopped spinning, though he was still posing. He didn’t move for a long time.
Akane skated over towards the announcer’s bench, grabbing the microphone. “MIKADO SANZENIN IS UNCONSCIOUS!” she declared. “RANMA AND NABIKI ARE THE WINNERS!”
A great cheer erupted from the crowd. Nabiki smiled widely, waving to the audience, before wrapping an arm around Ranma, and helping her off the ice and into the locker room.
Ranma clutched the trench coat tighter around her shoulders. “W-w-we did it!” she said through chattering teeth.
Nabiki finished checking the stalls and showers in the girls locker room, ensuring they were alone. Then she locked the door. “Hell yeah, we did!” she crowed, coming over and hugging her fiancée. She leaned down, giving her a kiss. “You did great!”
Ranma blushed, wrapping her arms around the taller girl. “Th-th-thanks, but you took out Azusa yourself…”
Nabiki blushed. “Well, Soichiro did.” She looked up, putting a finger on her chin. “I hope Akane thought to grab him for me…”
Ranma chuckled. “I’m s-s-sure he’s fine,” she managed. “Th-th-think I can get a shower to warm up?”
Nabiki gave her one more squeeze, before rushing off to the showers. “Yeah, we’re all clear in here!” she called as she turned the hot water on to full blast in one of the stalls.
Ranma sighed in relief. “Why the hell was there a pool of cold water under the ice anyway?” she grumbled as she shucked her wet clothes and made her way over to the showers. A row of curtains came into view, the one Nabiki had turned on for her had a billow of steam floating up to the ceiling.
Ranma giggled happily at the sight of the hot water. “Thanks for warming it up for me!” she called out.
Nabiki stuck her head out through the curtain, surprising Ranma, and making her squeak in surprise. She smirked at her. “You don’t mind a little company do you?” she asked. “I’m cold too!”
Ranma returned the smirk with one of her own. “I dunno,” she drawled. “I don’t think they would approve of a man and a woman sharing a stall in here.”
Nabiki shrugged. Opening the curtain, she made a big show of turning down the hot water, and up the cold. “If that’s how you feel, then…”
Ranma reached in, cranking the hot water back up. Enough of the spray hit him to affect the change back to his male form.
“No! I’m sure it will be—” the remainder of Ranma’s sentence was drowned out by the giant smash as the wall next to the showers was blown inward. Through the dust, a figure could be seen.
“Ranma! I kill!”
Shampoo held her chui at the ready, her eyes scanning the room. It was some kind of public bathing area, but there didn’t seem to be anyone around. Good. Fewer casualties. Fewer witnesses.
She had tracked her quarry to this city but lost the trail weeks ago. Shampoo got a job so she could eat, and kept an ear out for any gossip about a red-haired martial artist or a panda. There had been sightings here and there, so she knew she was in the right place.
Then there was a big martial arts battle two weeks ago. The whole town was abuzz about some local champion being taken out by a red-haired challenger named “Ranma”. It had to be her. All Shampoo needed to do was wait until the next big match was announced. If there was a girl involved, she knew Ranma would be there.
A poster announcing the Martial Arts Skating battle had been taped to the window at her place of employment. Despite the fact that her quarry wasn't featured on the poster, Shampoo knew Ranma would be involved. One of the boys pictured on the poster looked like he must have been a brother or a cousin of hers; they even shared a name! If she didn’t show up, then he might know where to find her.
The sound of a running shower told her someone was in here. Stepping through the debris, she made her way over to the stall, lifting the curtain with one of her weapons. Inside she saw a couple, clutching at each other as the hot water streamed down on them. The man took a step forward, gently pushing his lover behind him, and took up a fighting stance.
Shampoo cocked an eyebrow. Well, well, well! If it wasn’t the boy-Ranma! She hadn’t watched the match, but it seemed that he and his partner were celebrating their victory. She brandished her weapon. “Where Ranma?” she asked.
Ranma clutched his fists. “You found him…” he said cautiously.
Shampoo rolled her eyes. She wished she’d paid more attention to her great-grandmother’s language lessons; she sounded like an idiot in this regressive tongue. “Not boy-Ranma,” she growled, glancing down at his crotch. “girl-Ranma! Shampoo know you hiding her. She sister? Cousin?”
Nabiki’s eyes widened. This was Shampoo? No wonder Ranma had been on the run from her if she could do that to a cinder block wall. She peeked around her fiancé’s broad shoulders. She didn’t look like a super-strong maniac, but she knew too well that looks were deceiving.
The fact that Shampoo didn’t know about the curse was interesting. Ranma had said that he hadn’t been able to turn back into a boy for six weeks while they walked back from Jusenkyo, but she didn’t think he knew Shampoo was completely unaware of the curse.
She could feel Ranma’s back muscles tighten under her hand as he prepared to fight. Uh oh, the plan. Weeks ago when Ranma told her about Shampoo, they had come up with a sort of trap for her: lure her to the Tendo Dojo where she could be defeated once and for all, then let the authorities take care of the foreigner who entered the country illegally while carrying weapons.
Nabiki thought fast, and the little white lie she had used to get rid of Kuno sprung to mind. “She’s not here!” she shouted. “You’re right, she’s his cousin! We haven’t seen her in about ten days. She said something about visiting her mother in Hokkaido.”
Shampoo growled. Ten days? How could she have missed her? “Where Hokkaido?”
“It’s the island to the north,” Nabiki said. “She’s from a town called Wakkanai.”
Shampoo bared her teeth. “You better not be lying…”
Nabiki stood to her full height, stepping out from behind Ranma’s protection. “She’s not here,” she said firmly.
Shampoo groaned. Without another word, she spun on her heel, and walked out of the hole she made in the wall earlier.
Ranma relaxed from his stance, turning back to his fiancée. “That was kinda dumb,” he chastised softly. “Kiss of Death, remember? I don’t need her coming after you too.”
Nabiki wrapped her arms around Ranma, leaning on him as the adrenaline drained from her body. “She’s gone, isn’t she? Now we can come up with a different plan.”
“What was wrong with the plan we had?” Ranma asked.
“It was shattered on the rocks as new information came to light,” Nabiki said. “She doesn’t know about the curse!”
Ranma’s eyes widened. “I hadn’t thought about that!” He stroked his chin. “So what do we do?”
Nabiki sighed, wrapping her arms around him “I’m not sure yet,” she admitted, “but I'm sure we can come up with something.”
Shampoo could not believe she hadn’t found the panda until now.
It’s a fucking panda for crying out loud! People would know if there was a panda living nearby! Especially in Japan where it was rare to see them outside of a handful of zoos. The presence of one just wandering around town should have been headline news in all of the newspapers! Sure, there were rumors, but they were largely attributed to people seeing things when they drank too much. Nobody would admit to seeing one sober.
Either the people in this town were masters at minding their own business, or they were all nuts.
But there it was! Out in plain daylight, standing at the front of some business and sweeping the walk with a broom.
Shampoo wasn’t sure what circus the animal had been stolen from, but she was sure the government in Beijing would want to know about it…
Now she was glad she had postponed her plans to leave for Hokkaido until the end of the week so she could collect her next paycheck. If the panda was still in town, then Ranma surely would be back for him sooner or later.
She checked her watch. Her shift started in about an hour, but she had tomorrow off. She would come back here to see if the panda came back, and if it did, she would follow it to wherever it was staying. Ranma would come to her.
Genma put the broom away in the cupboard at the end of the day. He sighed. Another day of… ugh… hard work… in the books. When his son announced his upcoming nuptials, he had found part time work for the first time in years. Soun had insisted he help pay for the expenses of the wedding.
He grumbled to himself. He remembered Soun being more generous when he was younger. Or at least more gullible and susceptible to his suggestions…
He prepared a sign, then wandered over to his boss. He wasn’t sure if Doctor Tofu even knew about the curse; Genma had never bothered to show him and he always showed up to work in his panda form. Tofu barely seemed to notice that he wasn’t a man most of the time. Genma was just fine with that. He was more comfortable as a panda. People expected less of him.
The walk is all swept, Boss, the sign read. He held up another. Can I get my pay?
Tofu smiled at his employee. “Payday already? No problem.” He opened a drawer, pulling out some bills.
Genma nodded his thanks, tucking the money into the same pocket he kept his sign supplies. He should have enough saved for Ranma’s wedding outfit now. That should make Soun happy. Maybe they could celebrate with a bottle tonight.
He wandered out the door and made his way home. Other pedestrians gave him a wide berth, another point in favor of remaining in his panda form as much as possible. Really the only reason he could think of to change back into a man from time to time was so he could eat human food. He never did like the taste of bamboo.
Hmm… That woman back there made the same turns he had at the last three intersections. He watched her in a fisheye traffic mirror as he walked past. Despite the hot late-spring weather, she was wearing a cloak with a hood so he couldn’t see her face. Could it be someone trying to cash in on a promised engagement? He had used his son as a bargaining chip multiple times during their travels. Or perhaps it was Nodoka finally tracking him down. That thought made him wince, swallowing hard against an imagined blade at his neck. No, it couldn’t be her; he had made sure that Soun’s wife’s address book was well hidden.
It would be a bad idea to lead her back to the Tendo home, whoever she was. She may not be hostile now, but Genma wasn’t about to take any chances. In his experience, women often didn’t stay genial for long.
He suddenly broke out into a run, ducking into a side street, then a second one right away. Then he leapt over a high wall and into someone’s backyard. The owner of said yard stared in amazement and fear as a panda made its way towards his house, opening the back door, and walking inside. Genma made his way through the house, and out the front door. Satisfied that he had surely lost his tail, he slowed his pace, and made for the most direct route back to the dojo. He chuckled to himself. You had to get up pretty early in the morning to pull one on Genma Saotome!
“Hello Saotome-san,” Kasumi greeted cheerfully as he walked in the door.
“Goruf,” Genma replied politely.
“Who’s your friend?” she asked, looking behind him.
Genma twisted around, completely surprised. He took up a defensive pose, ready for a fight. Behind him was the woman in the cloak he had noticed earlier. How the hell did she keep up with him?
The woman removed her hood and Genma’s heart froze. No!
Shampoo smirked at Genma. She bowed deeply. “Thank you for leading me here,” she said in careful Japanese. She turned to Kasumi, bowing again. “Shampoo is my name. Where is Ranma?”
Kasumi smiled at her guest. “Of course! Won’t you follow me?”
Shampoo nodded politely, following Kasumi into the living room. There Ranma, Nabiki, and Akane were sitting watching TV. Shampoo handed Kasumi her cloak, and took a seat next to Akane without a word.
The four teens continued to watch the show without saying a word to each other. Kasumi came in at one point, putting a bowl of popcorn in the center. Akane grabbed a handful, before passing the bowl to her left. “Xiexie,” said Shampoo.
The other three fell back in their seats in surprise, finally realizing just who had been sitting next to them. “Sh-Shampoo!” Ranma exclaimed. “What are you doing here?”
Shampoo shrugged. “Waiting for girl-Ranma.”
Nabiki cleared her throat. “We told you she was in Hokkaido.”
Shampoo nodded, taking another handful of popcorn. “She be back,” she said confidently. She munched on her snack, turning back to the TV.
The three teens looked at each other as Shampoo laughed at the antics of the actors on the screen. They leaned in close to each other, whispering conspiratorially with each other.
“That’s Shampoo?” Akane asked. “She doesn’t look all that tough. She’s too pretty to be deadly.” She put a finger on her chin. “I wonder where she got that cheongsam, and if they come in yellow…”
“You saw what she did to the wall in the dressing room at the rink,” Ranma countered. “She may be the beauty of her village, but she’s crazy strong.”
“Oh? You didn’t say you thought she was beautiful before,” Nabiki said sharply.
Ranma rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean.”
“So what do we do?” asked Akane, trying to get them back on track. “She’s going to find out about the curse. Didn’t you say her village was near Jusenkyo? I’m sure she knows about it.”
“We’ve already thought about that,” said Nabiki. She pointed at the table where a thermos was sitting. “There’s a bunch of those around the house. All we need to do is stall, and eventually she’ll get bored and leave
“Can Shampoo please have water?” their guest asked aloud. “Popcorn is really salty.”
Ever the consummate hostess, Kasumi appeared from the kitchen carrying a tray of drinks for everyone. Ranma nervously waved off the one offered to him, but the other three each took a glass.
Ranma lost all interest in the show, his mind racing a mile a minute trying to figure out what to do about the girl who wanted to kill him sitting a meter away. Maybe they should just go back to their original plan? But the last time he knocked her out she woke up quicker than he expected; much too quickly for them to call the police on her while she was out cold. She must have a thick skull…
Akane leaned back, and accidentally bumped her glass with her elbow. Water and ice cubes spilled across the tabletop, racing to the other side.
Ranma leaped up into the air, pressing himself against two ceiling joists to hold himself in the air and out of the splash zone. Shampoo looked up at him quizzically, but soon turned back to the TV.
Kasumi arrived with a towel and mopped up the spill. “Will you be staying for dinner, Shampoo?” she asked.
Shampoo bowed politely. “Thank you.”
Ranma and Nabiki both facepalmed.
Dinner was a rather awkward affair that night.
Ranma and Nabiki sat as far away from Shampoo as they could, neither taking their eyes off of her.
Akane sat next to their guest, periodically glancing at her, blushing, before muttering under her breath and shoving food in her mouth. Nabiki couldn't make out what her sister was saying, and resolved to ask her later.
Shampoo was a gracious guest. She praised Kasumi for her cooking in polite–if broken–Japanese. It turned out that she enjoyed cooking herself, and she and Kasumi chatted amiably about this recipe and that cooking method. She even offered to make her great-grandmother’s extra special ramen recipe for dinner tomorrow.
“Wait, you're coming back tomorrow?" Ranma asked somewhat frantically.
Shampoo nodded. “Dāngrán. Girl-Ranma not here yet. Shampoo stay until she return.”
“That could be a while,” Nabiki said. “She said she was going back to visit her mom. Could be a few weeks.” She took a bite of her dinner, taking the time to chew and swallow to allow Shampoo to think about her words. “Seriously, you're probably better off just going to Hokkaido to find her.”
Shampoo shrugged. “Shampoo wait. Is no big deal.”
“Do you need somewhere to stay, Shampoo?” Kasumi asked. “We can set up a futon for you in the living room.”
“Āi yā! Kasumi is too kind! Shampoo accept! Will be better than tent!”
Ranma and Nabiki both pulled faces at Kasumi.
“It's no trouble at all!” Kasumi said.
“What if Ranma never comes back?” Ranma blurted out. “She might decide to stay in Hokkaido!”
Shampoo simply pointed with her chopsticks. “She leave her panda behind,” she said cheerfully. “She come back.”
Genma had the decency to look ashamed. Ranma and Nabiki both stared daggers at him. Staying in his cursed form full time seemed like a worse idea all the time.
“Oh… She abandoned him!” Ranma said, thinking quickly. He whacked Genma upside the head. “This stupid thing eats too much. And it never bathes.”
Shampoo shook her head. “I no believe you. Panda too valuable.” She turned back to Kasumi. “Thank you for delicious food. I help wash dishes, yes?” She stood and helped clear the table.
Ranma dropped his head to the table. Staying in one form for longer than a couple of hours was hard enough. Now he had to stay in his male form all the time?
He was doomed…
“We’re home!” called Akane as the three teens walked in the door. Shoes were removed and bags were dropped. Akane raced up the stairs to get changed out of her uniform.
Ranma turned to Nabiki, bouncing excitedly on his toes. “Do you want to join us in the dojo?”
Nabiki grimaced. “I did say that I was going to do that, didn't I?”
Ranma shrugged, smirking. “It’s probably a good idea, unless you want Shampoo to kick your butt for ‘hiding girl-Ranma’ from her.”
Nabiki sighed. “Yeah, yeah. Gimme some time to go up and put on some workout clothes.” She suddenly smiled, leaning in to whisper in his ear. “I have this tight little leotard that shows off my legs I can put on for you.” She laughed when Ranma blushed as bright as a tomato.
Before she could leave, there was a galloping sound coming down the hallway. They turned to look, and saw Genma and Soun rushing towards them. “Ranma!” cried Soun. “What are you doing standing around? We must be off!”
Ranma blinked in confusion. “Off? Off where?”
“You need your wedding outfit!” said Genma. “We’re going to a rental store to get you measured up!”
Ranma grimaced, looking at Nabiki. “But we were going to traaaaaaain!”
Nabiki rolled her eyes.
“Now, now,” said Soun. “You said you wanted a rush wedding. Well, that means we need to do everything in a rush!” He put his arm around Ranma’s shoulders, pushing him towards the door. “Come! The rental store had a cancellation, but we have to go now or they’ll give our spot to someone else!”
“Hey! Wait!” Ranma was surprised at just how strong his father-in-law was. “I need my shoes.”
Nabiki let out a small sigh of relief, though she knew it would be a short reprieve. She made her way upstairs to her room, only to find her sisters both waiting for her. Spread out on the bed was a white kimono; the one she was to wear at her wedding.
Kasumi smiled at her. “I’ve made the adjustments, we just need to make sure it fits!”
Akane held up a bottle. “And then we’re going to have some fun! Shampoo had to work this evening, so we can relax!”
Kasumi frowned. “Open that after the kimono is put away please! I don't want to have to clean sake stains out of the silk.”
Nabiki grinned. “Aww, you guys…” She sniffed. “You're the best sisters a girl could have.”
Kasumi wiped at her eyes. “Now you've got me started,” she chastised. She smiled, motioning with her hands. “Get undressed quickly! I’ve been waiting anxiously all day to see you wearing it!”
Nabiki's sisters oohed and ahhed at her in her wedding kimono, not a dry eye between the three of them. Kasumi’s prowess with the needle shone through, as it was a perfect fit. Quickly, she disrobed again, and the outfit went back into its box to wait for the big day.
Akane held up her bottle again. “Great! Now let's party!” she exclaimed. Before she could open the bottle, Kasumi snatched it from her hands.
Kasumi eyed the label critically. “Where did you get this, anyway?” she asked.
Akane shrugged. “From Dad’s cabinet. He won't miss it. He's been drinking a lot more since Saotome-san and Ranma arrived.”
Kasumi shook her head. “No, this just won’t do.” She stood, and left the room for a moment, coming back with a different bottle.
Nabiki read the label, and her eyes widened. “Where did you get that?” she asked. “That bottle has got to be worth at least ¥30,000!”
Kasumi shrugged. “I have my sources,” she said enigmatically. “Father and Saotome-san drink cheap sake because they just want to get drunk. I prefer to enjoy my drink.” She cracked the seal, unscrewing the cap. “Akane, could you please set up the warmer?”
Nabiki chuckled. Her sister was just full of surprises.
The trio drank and talked. They talked about Nabiki's future now that she was getting married. Talked about whether Kasumi and Tofu would be next to tie the knot. Nabiki teased Akane with the idea that she and Ryoga were destined to get married someday.
Akane put her cup down firmly. “Lishen,” she said, slurring slightly. “Ryoga's a pig. Both metaphorically and literally. No thanksh.” Her sisters laughed.
Kasumi dug in a pocket. “I have something for you, Nabiki,” she said excitedly. “I won it at the market today!” She handed over a brochure.
Nabiki took it, reading the title. “An all-expenses paid trip to a hot spring resort? Holy shit!” She looked up. “Are you sure? You should use it!”
Kasumi waved her off. “Oh, don't worry about me, I’d be bored going all by myself. Take Ranma with you and have a happy honeymoon together.” She leaned in, winking. “Go disturb someone else in the middle of the night with your cries of passion.”
Akane laughed out loud as Nabiki blushed. She suddenly stood, wavering slightly. “I have something too!” She raced off. Nabiki could hear her rummaging around in her room for a moment, before she came tromping back through the door. “Here!” she said triumphantly as she handed Nabiki a package in a paper bag.
Nabiki reached into the bag, pulling out a round, plastic case. Opening the clamshell, she started to laugh when she saw the ring of pills inside.
Akane frowned, pouring herself another cup. “I don't know why you're laughing. I got you a practical gift! Now you can ‘feel the splash’ all you want and I don't become an auntie when I'm only sixteen.”
Kasumi leaned in close. “What does it feel like?” She asked conspiratorially. “‘The splash,’ I mean. I always had my boyfriend pull out.”
Akane’s and Nabiki's jaws dropped. “Since when have you had sex?” Nabiki demanded.
“And unprotected?” Akane added, equally scandalized.
Kasumi smiled enigmatically. “You don't know everything about me. You remember my boyfriend in high school, don’t you? Osamu-chan?” She took a drink, then sighed wistfully. “Sometimes when I hear you and Ranma together, I miss our nights together. But we wanted different things in life, so we broke up when I graduated.”
“Our pure and virginal older sister,” Nabiki chuckled. “Drinking good sake, having sex… And we never knew!”
“Osamu had his own apartment. I knew better than to sneak him into my bed and wake my sisters,” Kasumi teased.
Nabiki narrowed her eyes at her older sister. “Didn’t you just chastise me the other day for having sex with Ranma before marriage?”
Kasumi took a drink, frowning. “Yes, because I knew you two were taking unnecessary risks. I don't want to be an auntie yet either. Osamu and I never even had a scare.” She sighed wistfully. “But I admit, it does feel better without.”
Nabiki toasted her sister. “You got that right!” She took a drink, then grinned at Akane. “I will put your gift to good use.”
Akane grumbled, pouring herself another drink. “Why does everything have to come back to boys?”
Nabiki and Kasumi shared a look, before turning back to their younger sister. “Don't knock it until you try it!” they chorused, before breaking down in giggles.
Akane seethed for a moment, before joining her sisters in laughter.
Shampoo munched on popcorn, reclining on the floor watching TV as her hosts rushed around preparing for a party. Kasumi had mentioned that boy-Ranma and Nabiki were getting married soon, and they were trying to get everything ready.
Shampoo loved weddings. Deep down, she was a romantic at heart and she wanted to be involved in any way possible to soak up the lovey dovey feelings by proxy. Unfortunately, Kasumi thanked her but declined her offer to help. The elder Tendo said that this was strictly a family affair, and she couldn’t ask their guest to assist when she wasn’t going to attend.
Shampoo sighed. The bride and groom were weird anyway and kind of mean. They always kept their distance from her, whispering to each other whenever she was around. Maybe she didn’t want to be involved with their wedding after all.
She looked up when she heard the doorbell ring. Everyone was busy with one thing or the other, and they all seemed like they were expecting someone else to answer the door. The bell rang again, insistent. Shampoo grumbled as she stood from her seat, and went to get it herself.
Behind the door was a boy about her age. He was dirty, obviously having been on the road for a long time. His broad shoulders and upright stance showed his strength, and the way he subtly shifted his stance when an unfamiliar face was revealed behind the door proved he was a martial artist too. Shampoo looked him up and down. He was kind of cute, but his face made her discount his potential as a boyfriend. That blank expression belied a lack of intelligence that she just found revolting. She had seen it too often on Mousse…
“Uhh, is this the Tendo residence?” Ryoga asked.
Shampoo nodded. “They all busy. Come back later.” She moved to shut the door.
Panicking, Ryoga slammed his hand on the door to prevent her from closing it in his face. “Wait! I’m a friend!” he cried desperately. “I’ve been on the road for days, and I desperately need a bath. Let me in, or it’ll take me a week to find this place again!”
Shampoo frowned at him, annoyed that this man was making her miss her show. Still, she knew how kind hearted Kasumi was, and she would probably extend an invitation. She stepped back from the door, inviting him in. “Bathroom is down hall to left,” she said, pointing.
Ryoga sighed in relief. “Thanks,” he said. “I’ve been here before.” He then proceeded to go down the hall and turn right.
Shampoo shook her head. See? An idiot who didn’t even know his left from his right.
Bathed and dressed in a spare set of clothes he left in the changing room, Ryoga found himself standing in the dojo. It looked like it was being set up for a party; there were tables, chairs, a balloon arch, and a sort of stage all pushed to one side. No food had been set out, unfortunately.
He had intended to go to the kitchen after he finally made it to the bath. He still had no idea why the Tendo house had eight staircases in it but only the one bathroom, but he figured it was something to do with the traditional pre-war architecture. Maybe it was to trap invaders or something.
He was about to turn around when he noticed who was using the dojo for a workout: his bitter arch-rival and his fiancée were off in a corner away from the party supplies, working through some katas.
Nabiki was breathing hard, working through a barely remembered sequence over and over. Her muscles screamed, her lungs dying, sweat dripped from her brow. This was why she had given up on martial arts in the first place.
Ranma nodded, satisfied that she had completed the workout correctly. “Good. Now do it backwards fifty times.”
Nabiki was going to make Ranma pay for this later… Somehow…
Ryoga approached Ranma, eyeing his student critically. “You know, you really should—”
“Oh, she’ll be doing that,” Ranma said.
“What about—”
“Too soon. Besides I’d need to get a—”
“Mmm, good point. Hard to find them this time of year.”
Nabiki collapsed to the ground, panting for breath. Ranma handed her a water bottle, which she greedily drank down.
Ryoga turned to Ranma. “By the way, what’s with the maid?” he asked.
“What maid?”
“The girl who answered the door. Purple hair in buns?”
Ranma winced. “She’s not a maid. She’s Shampoo.”
Ryoga quirked an eyebrow. “What kind of a name is ‘Shampoo’?”
“Chinese,” Ranma replied. He gave Ryoga a serious look. “From Jusenkyo.”
Ryoga gasped. “Does she have a cure?” he asked excitedly, grabbing Ranma's hands, and giving him his best puppy-dog eyes. “You have to let me go first! You owe me!”
Ranma recoiled, ripping away his hands. “No! She’s…” he quickly glanced around to make sure Shampoo wasn't within earshot, “she’s here to kill me. Girl-me that is!” He quickly explained his past with Shampoo. “I’m training Nabiki so that she can at least defend herself for a little while if Shampoo attacks her for hiding the other me.”
Ryoga frowned. “So why is she watching TV in your living room instead of taking your head home in a burlap sack?”
“She doesn’t know about the curse. She thinks ‘girl-Ranma’ is my cousin, and is just waiting around for her to reappear.”
Ryoga smirked. “Is that so..?”
Nabiki sat up. “Ryoga, if you tell Shampoo about the curse, so help me I will turn you into a pig and have you gelded.”
Ryoga swallowed hard. If there was one thing he had learned recently, it was not to mess with the Tendo sisters.
“Fine,” he said. “I promise I won’t tell her about the curse.” He bowed, then turned to walk back into the house. If he was lucky, he might find the kitchen on the fifth floor before too long.
Shampoo used the remote to flip through the channels. Her show had ended, and now there was nothing good on.
She sighed, bored. Maybe she should have gone to Hokkaido. Waiting around was just making her lazy, and she didn’t like the number that showed on the scale when she weighed herself that morning. At least on the road she would stay in shape.
She turned off the TV, chucking the remote onto the table, and lay back onto the floor. Her shift at work didn’t start for another two hours. Maybe she should go for a walk. Who knew, she might run into girl-Ranma coming back for the wedding and get the drop on her. She stood and made her way to the door, only to run into a body coming the other way.
“S-sorry!” Ryoga said, grabbing her arm. “Are you okay?”
Shampoo shrugged his hand off. “Fine,” she said firmly. She moved to brush last him.
Ryoga winced. He wanted to talk to Shampoo to see if she knew anything about a cure for this infernal curse. She probably wouldn’t say anything if she was in a sour mood with him, though. Small talk! That was the ticket! “U-um!” Ryoga called, catching her attention. “What’s going on around here? Some kind of party?”
Shampoo crossed her arms, nodding. “Boy-Ranma and Nabiki wedding.”
Ryoga chuckled darkly. “I can’t believe a cad like Ranma could score such a cute girlfriend,” he complained.
Shampoo joined in the laughter. “No understand what she see in him. He a coward who runs away from spilled water!”
Ryoga’s eyes widened. So she didn’t like him much either, huh? He almost blurted out the secret of Ranma’s curse, but remembered Nabiki’s promise. Well, maybe there was another way…
“You know, he’s out there teaching Nabiki how to fight you,” he said.
Shampoo threw her head back, laughing long and loud. Finally she calmed down. “Oh, that too too funny,” she said, wiping a tear from her eye. “Shampoo is champion back home. No other woman can beat me.”
“Oh? Nabiki seemed to think she could take you.”
“What?” Shampoo asked flatly.
“Yeah, Ranma told me how… uhh… his cousin defeated you with one shot? He said that he taught her everything she knew, and was now teaching his fiancée the same.”
Shampoo saw red. She knew they were talking about her! Every sideways glance, every whispered comment to the other. They were laughing at her. She reached behind her back, and her massive chui maces appeared in her hands. “Where they?” she asked, deadly serious.
Ryoga blinked in surprise; just where did she keep those things? “They’re out in the dojo,” he said.
Shampoo darted off without another word. Ryoga chuckled to himself, then rushed to follow her. This might be more fun than the movies!
“Good job Nabiki!” Ranma said genuinely. “We’ll make a martial artist out of you yet!”
Nabiki lay flat on her back on the hardwood floor panting heavily. She could barely lift her head, let alone any of her limbs. “Nope,” she said. “I’m just gonna die right here. Sorry for making you a widower before making you a husband. Just do me a favor and spend the money hidden in my room on a decent headstone.”
Ranma smirked. “Money? In your room? Well hell, maybe I’ll just use that to find me a new fiancée instead!”
Nabiki was on her feet in an instant, her hands gripping Ranma’s lapels. “Say that again?” she said dangerously.
Ranma just laughed. “I knew you could stand.”
Nabiki grumbled, releasing him. “Yeah well…” she took a deep breath, shaking out her arms. “What do you think my chances are against her then?”
Ranma shrugged. “I mean, you just started. It’s obvious that you remember some of your katas, but it will take time for it to become muscle memory again.”
Nabiki grunted in acknowledgement. “Would I at least be able to stay alive if Shampoo attacked me?”
“We find out, yes?”
Ranma and Nabiki turned towards the door to find Shampoo standing there, taking a ready stance. Nabiki gulped when she noticed the massive maces in each hand. The balls on the ends of the handles were each larger than her head, and Nabiki wasn’t sure she could lift one with both hands.
Ranma stepped in front of his fiancée, taking up his own ready stance, his face deadly serious. “What’s this about, Shampoo?”
Shampoo shrugged. “I hear you training Nabiki to fight. It has been a long time, figured it might be a good workout.” She aggressively walked forward.
Ranma made to step forward, but Nabiki grabbed his arm. “No!” she whispered to him. “Kiss of Death, remember?”
Ranma shrugged her off. “Doesn’t matter to me. I can take her. She would hurt you. Badly.” He glanced back, giving her a smile. “Besides, we gotta get married this weekend, right?”
Nabiki frowned. “You gotta be alive for that too, you know.”
Shampoo growled. She didn't like being ignored. “Out of way, man,” she snarled. “This fight between women.”
“She’s not ready for that,” Ranma replied. “Come back in six months.”
“Nah,” Shampoo replied. “Too bored.” Suddenly she moved, spinning wildly, swinging her deadly weapons around.
Ranma swung out a roundhouse kick, trying to disarm his opponent of at least one of her weapons. Shampoo easily dodged, spinning past like a dervish.
Nabiki gulped as Shampoo quickly closed the distance. Her body froze; she tried to take up a defensive stance, but her limbs refused to move. Shampoo grinned evilly as she reared back to strike.
POW!
When Ranma missed his first blow, he crouched low, then sprang up into the air, coming down with both feet on Shampoo's head, driving her into the floor. They skidded forward for a moment, before coming to a halt at Nabiki's feet.
Nabiki was stunned. She was alive. Ranma gave her a smug look, but she ignored it. She grabbed him by the arm. “You have to go,” she said sharply. “My money is in my underwear drawer. Take it all, get a train ticket as far south as you can afford; we told her your ‘cousin’ was in Hokkaido, so she'll be looking for you to the north. You can probably get on a boat to Australia from Osaka. I’ll follow when I can.”
Ranma shrugged off her hand “No, I ain't leaving,” he insisted. “She already ignored international borders to find me here, running to Australia wouldn’t help. It’s time to make a stand.”
“Idiot!” Nabiki cried, tears forming in her eyes. “She’s trying to kill you!”
“Then I need to deal with her now!” He replied equally as loud. “I don’t wanna have to be looking over my shoulder to protect you! To protect our…” he stopped, slamming his mouth closed.
Despite herself, Nabiki felt her heart begin to race. He wants kids? she thought. She shook her head. Not important right now! “What are you going to do then, kill her?”
“I don’t know!” Ranma shouted. “But I gotta do something!”
Before the argument could continue, Shampoo stirred. Ranma grabbed Nabiki’s arm, pulling her to safety behind him.
Shaking her head, Shampoo slowly climbed to her feet. She turned to see Ranma protecting Nabiki, his arms raised to defend himself. She smiled.
Ranma readied himself for anything. A sword, one of those chuis, hell he even knew what to do if she pulled a gun on him. His mind raced through every single counter attack he knew, sifting through for the best move he had to take her down for good.
She opened her arms. Ok, it’s a grappling attack. That narrowed it down. All he needed to do was—
Before he could react, Shampoo was on him. Her arms wrapped around his neck, her face was close in with his, and she kissed him long, and deep. Ranma was so surprised that he opened his mouth, and she immediately jammed her tongue inside.
Nabiki's jaw dropped. This was the Kiss of Death?
Ranma finally got his train of thought back on track. He pushed Shampoo away, breaking the kiss, only for her to snuggle into his chest. “Wo ai ni!” she said.
What the fuck was happening?