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They had denied her. She had screamed her lungs out at the Gods, begging them to do anything, anything at all to save her father, and yet, they gave her nothing. There were sympathetic glances and murmured apologies as the Gods simply 'couldn't risk the narrative.’
Onions pleads for her fathers life had fallen on deaf ears as she was turned away, left alone in the gods' domain.
Even after the countless times kantje had saved the narrative, they wouldn't return the favor for him. There was no attempt to save her father from his fate.
Onion turned, her footsteps echoed across the endstone, loose shards kicked up by the soles of her feet as she ran back to the foot of the narrative, wishing maybe she could get back in enough time to save him. To prevent the end of his story.
.
Onion stumbled into the foot of the narrative to the sickening sound of flesh being torn, the sharp, putrid smell of blood filled the air. Onion felt his heart drop, eyes widening as he watched the sword plunge into his fathers chest. Drawn out and stabbed in again and again, until there was a blinding flash of light. A blur of particles as a whole became broken, shattered across the narrative to what it once was.
And in an instant, he was gone.
The world felt like it went still. Onion breathed in and out, shallow stunned breaths as Boomie turned to her, he was covered in blood, it dripped from his sword, stained his skin and suit in deep crimson. Covered with Kabs blood- kantjes blood.
“Sorry kid”
Boomies voice held no empathy, no remorse, no sadness or guilt. It was cold. It felt hollow.
He didn't get to call her kid.
Onion remembered Boomies laugh, the way he nudged his shoulder, telling him to keep him and his father out of trouble. Calling her a smart kid, joking that she didn't take after her dad at all. His smile was warm as he ruffled her hair, before spawning in his own portal and leaving with a wave, bidding her and kantje goodbye until they would meet again for some other multiversal adventure.
That Boomie was gone, replaced by her fathers killer, who looked at them with glowing cold eyes.
“It's just business, martyrs die like martyrs. Try not to end up with the same fate”
Boomie turned and left. Mark and Dijon had slipped away, leaving Onion alone at the foot of the narrative.
She was alone.
She was alone.
Onion was absolutely, and utterly alone here.
On shaky legs that could barely hold them, Onion stumbled forward. Onion fell to the ground, they felt their fathers blood soak into their pants as they kneeled on the ground where his body should have been.
There was a red scarf there, it was hard to tell the red of his blood from the red of his scarf. Onion reached forward, taking it in her hands before she cradled it close to her chest, her hands shaking. She clutched onto the scarf like a lifeline, like if they held on tight enough, somehow, he would come back.
Onion sat there for hours, whispering in a hoarse voice for him to come back, that she wasn't ready. He couldn't leave her yet, they didn't want to lose their dad yet.
Onion stumbled as she tried to stand, her legs were numb and shaky. She willed herself forward, hand catching on the rough bark of their portal, Onion clutched onto the wood like a lifeline.
They didn't want to go back to showtime alone.
They didn't want to go back to that house she knew would be empty.
Her fathers den that would be strangely quiet, with no one to live in it.
The thought of the nooks in her fathers room collecting dust with no one to take care of it made her sick.
Onion didn't want to go back to showtime, to pretend like he could just sit on their couch and wait for the day that his dad would push open their door and call that he made it home safe.
Except he couldn't.
Onion clutched the scarf in their hand as they made it back to showtime.
The feet landed in the grass of the valley. The wind whistled, it still felt too quiet.
As they approached their house, a voice called out to her. Onion turned towards the source of the voice.
Saturn practically ran up to her, labored breathing muffled by his mask.
“There- there you are kid, God Onion i've been calling for you for a hot minute, you weren't answering- where the hell did you go?? Dude kantje would have lost his shit if he got home from his mission and you had ran off again-”
Onion couldn't help the way they went rigid, Saturn clearly took notice, as the others' gaze furrowed, looking Onion up and down. Eyes widening as he took notice of the state she was in.
“Wait- Onion- woah woah what happened??- is that blood on you?!” Saturn's voice raised with concern, before the other finally spotted the tattered scarf held in her hand. Saturn went eerily still.
“Onion” Saturn's voice was quiet, too quiet, like he was scared of the answer he would receive.
“Wheres kantje”
Onion opened his mouth to speak, to try and get any tangible explanation out, but his words died in his throat as he felt himself start to cry. Xe Clutched onto Saturn, barely able to make out the words 'He's gone’ in between sobs.
.
It had been a few days, Onion was in his midway, taking some time to think. The others in the valley were handling this about as well as she was. Vi had asked her to meet with him the day after it happened, to try and get a clear explanation, they had another session scheduled at the end of the week, and that was really the only time Onion had seen Vi, the other had closed himself off before everything went down, according to Saturn and Rin at least. Both of them didn't really want to talk about it either, hushed whispers about trying to plan what they wanted to do for his funeral. This morning they had asked if Onion wanted to maybe write something for it, or if he wanted to help them pick out the flowers. He knows it's because they want him to have a semblance of control, they want to help him. Onion just mumbled something along the lines of he would ‘just have to think about it.’
Onion rocked back and forth on a swing that hung from a towering apple tree. Some fallen apples were scattered around his feet that had fallen off the tree. The apples sat, rotting away on the grass.
A breeze stirred the quiet midway, as there was a melodic sound, alerting Onion to the fact he wasn't alone.
Onion hadn't seen the Pariah sense the Gods denied his pleas for his fathers life.
The Pariah looked oddly out of place in Onions midway, the other approached her, standing next to the tree. Onion shifted herself on the swing slightly so she could see the narrative's guardian.
Star cleared their throat, a strangely human gesture, and star hesitantly asked if Onion was okay, if they were handling their fathers death alright.
Onion curled in on themselves, expression souring at the others words.
“How do you think I'm doing Pariah? He's gone.” Onion knew that was a selfish response, that the pariah didn't need passive aggression right now but the words tumbled out of their mouth before she could stop them. “And none of the gods even did anything to help.”
“Onion I..Im sorry I wanted to help-”
“Then why didn't you..?”
“My- my pact of neutrality prevents me from meddling in the narrative, not only that, but- preventing your fathers death would have not just broken the narrative but shattered it completely. And to- to come back from something like that would be near impossible it would be putting so many lives and stories at risk-” the Pariah attempted to explain, but was cut off.
“He was family Pariah,” Onion whispered as the god went silent.
She could see the way stars hand tightened, looking at the ground in what Onion could perceive as shame and guilt. An emotion unfamiliar to the other, Gods were not meant to grieve.
“He wasn't just my father, he was your friend, practically your family too.”
“I..”
“Listen. I- I wish I could be mad at you Pariah, I wish I could place some sort of blame for..for his death. But I can't. I can't do that. Pariah, you're some of the only family I have left. And I know you're mourning him too.”
Onion slowly got up from the swing, walking over towards the Pariah, hesitating for a moment, before they leaned themselves against the other, feeling the brush of feathers against their skin as a hand rested against her back. The Pariah was stiff, unsure, but continued to allow Onion to lean against star, the only comfort the other could really give. Onions hands caught in the other's cloak, holding onto it tightly.
“...It's not fair.” Onion whispered, their voice weak, “This isn't fair. He shouldn't- he shouldn't have had to die for this stupid narrative”
“I- I know little one I know, i'm so sorry, Im..sorry I didn't have it in me to save him, i'm sorry I failed you” the Pariahs voice echoed and cracked unnaturally.
The Pariah let the other latch on until Onion felt fine enough to let go, to make the journey back home. And when they left, Onion held a white pearlescent feather in their hand as they walked back to showtime. A small reminder of the support they had beyond the curtain of being mortal, that someone would always be watching over them.
.
The next day, Onion grabbed a bag with a few spare supplies in it, slinging it over their shoulder, walking past Rin who sat on their couch, idly flipping through a book. She told them that they were going out for the day to another world, just for the day. They promised it was a safe one, that they would be back by dinner, and told Rin not to worry.
Rin hesitated, gaze furrowing. They were worried, Onion knew that.
“Be safe” Rin’s voice was quiet,
“I will, I promise.” Onion gave the other a small nod of reassurance before they left.
Onion stepped out of the house,and in the blink of an eye their portal stood in front of them.
Onion entered the portal in showtime, and exited in a world she did not recognize.
.
The small town was nice, with a few people moving along the street, not busy enough to make Onion feel overcrowded, but enough people that the streets didn't feel desolate.
Onion explored the town until they found themselves at a small bar. Craning their head up, they looked at the hand carved wooden sign that hung above the door, reading ‘The Den’.
Inside the bar, there were a few people sitting at various tables and booths, with some littered across the main bar in the center of the room. Onion pulled herself onto one of the bar stools. Where she then rested her head in the palm of her hand, elbow leaning into the dark wood of the bar.
She idly listened to the quiet chatter, before someone behind the bar stepped in front of her, clearing their throat to get her attention, Onion looked up, feeling her heart drop in her chest.
“Hello las, what can I get for you today?”
It looked almost identical to him. His fur was less scarred, there wasn't any gray around his muzzle in this universe. his eyes looked less tired, less sunken in. His eyes were a marbled gray color, not the deep charcoal black she was used to. There were more and more small details that popped up as she analyzed every part of him, like he was still there. His ears had a few piercings, he had a golden tooth, he smiled the same as her father did. He had leather gloves on, they looked worn, with some small stitches, they looked handmade. In his hands he held a glass he was cleaning out as he spoke to her.
Onion didn't respond, mind reeling as the other version of her father’s expression shifted, looking at her in confusion and a little concern.
“Uh? You..alright? Would you…like anything to drink?”
Onion took in a sharp breath, feeling her hands tighten. “A- a water. Just- a water please.”
The kantje variant gave him an awkward smile, nodding. “Alright, i'll get that right out for you”
As he walked away, Onion breathed in and out, of course. kantje had been decentralized when he died. There wasn't just him anymore. There were countless other versions, countless other versions Onion could meet while out and about in the multiverse.
That wasn't her father, it was a fragment, one of a billion that made kantje himself.
Onion let the thought turn over and over in his head, trying to mentally prepare himself for when the kantje got back, he didn't want to confuse him or- mix up his narrative or something. Maybe things were going well for him in this universe, maybe…maybe he's happier in this one.
As Onion was deep in thought, kantje returned with her water, handing it to her with another small smile. Onion took the glass, immediately shaken from her thoughts, saying a small thank you. Kantje nodded, before he leaned against the bar.
“So, you from out of town? Because I dont think ive seen you around here before”
Onion just gave him a small nod, taking a sip of the water before setting it back down. “Yeah, I'm not..from around here Im..just visiting.”
“Just visiting? Well, welcome. What brings you around town? Are you here on business or another reason..?”
Onion hesitated before answering, she didn't meet the others eyes, she instead opted for staring at her glass. “Im..just wandering, that's all”
“Wandering, well, what are you wandering for?”
“What- what do you mean what for?”
“Well everyone has a reason for wandering, what's yours?”
Onion finally looked at kantje, eyes searching for someone who wasn't there. And kantje looked back, unable to recognize the person in front of him that he raised.
“Why do you want to know?” Onion asked, no real bite in their voice.
kantje shifted, tapping a clawed hand against the table, “Well, I'm pretty good at telling when somethings up with people, and when they need someone to talk to. I have been told I'm a pretty good listener, if you'd be willing to talk that is.”
Onion hesitated, lips pursing as she thought. “I..um- my- he..” Onion took off her glasses, rubbing her face with a shaky sigh before she drew back, putting her glasses back on. She began to speak to the man who somehow shared a face with her father, but was an absolute stranger.
“My..dad passed away a few days ago, I've been- looking for- I- I don't even know what I'm looking for, maybe a distraction? A way to fix it? I dont..I dont know”
The other kantje face fell, he looked at her with pity, sadness in his eyes. Onion had to bite back the ‘I miss you’ that sat on the top of her tongue. It felt like she was talking to a ghost. It reminded her about kantje and Archy, the thought left a bitter taste in her mouth.
“I'm sorry to hear about your father, he must have meant a lot to you.” kantjes' voice was soft and comforting as he spoke, Onion felt tears prick at her eyes.
“Yeah- yeah he did.” Onion's voice was weak as she spoke, she missed him.
“What was he like?”
Onion uses their sleeves to wipe away tears. “He was- busy. Really really busy, his job kept him away a lot but he tried. He was trying his best for what he had, he spent all the time with me he could, he always tried to make sure I was okay. He- it was like the entire world was against him just raising me. He was determined, always trying to save everyone else.
He did- god he did everything for me, everything he did it was for me. And- just like that he's gone. He's just- gone. He- we don't even have a body to bury. I didn't get- I- I didn't even get to say goodbye and now I have to help plan what I'm supposed to say at his funeral.” It had been years for kantje, journeys spread out over years, it hadn't even been a year for her yet, they were supposed to have more time than this- it wasn't fair.
kantje looked at them with sympathy, nudging the water closer to her. Carefully, Onion took the glass, drinking some water, trying to calm herself down.
“Thank you, i'm- sorry to just drop that on you”
“If I didn't want to listen I wouldn't have offered, you clearly needed to talk about that”
Onion nodded “It's just..trying to get used to it, remembering it happened at all, that he's..”
“Not coming home?”
Onion looked at the other in surprise, kantje realized he had blurted that out, and looked away, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “Sorry, didn't mean to barge in- but, I understand what you're feeling. I felt a similar way when my own father passed away, I get where you're coming from is what I'm trying to say.”
“Was his death..also recent for you?-”
“God no it happened when I was a teenager, maybe a little younger than you. Getting used to it takes time, it's not something you can rush. Hell, you said he passed away a few days ago, yeah?”
“Yeah, four days”
“For someone who's been dealing with that big of a loss, for only four days of grieving, you're doing great.”
“You really think so..?”
“Yeah, I do” kantje gave her another smile, and even if it wasn't truly him, Onion felt the comfort and relief flood through her all the same.
“Thank you, that- means a lot more to me than you know”
“Always happy to lend a helping hand where I can.”
There's silence over the two of them for a minute, briefly, Onion sticks a hand in her pocket, fingers wrapping around the red scarf he had taken from his father. Onion had been holding onto it for safekeeping, unable to leave it anywhere. It felt like maybe if he held onto it long enough, it was like he was still there
“Can I ask you another question?”
“Of course”
“Does..this feeling ever go away..? This- grief, this waiting..?”
kantje smiled sadly, “No kid, it doesn't. It never really goes away, but that doesn't mean we can't keep on living, do you have people back at home? Or was it just you and your dad?”
“Doesn't mean we cant keep on living” Onion murmured, echoing the others words as she Squeezed the scarf in her pocket. Mind wandering before Onion realized he had not actually answered the others' question.
“Oh!- uh- No. It wasn't just us it was..there's a lot of people living down in the Valley, I have a lot of people looking out for me, I- I see a therapist, I have Ri- I have people who will support me, who have been supporting me.” Onion cringed a bit, probably shouldn't let any names slip, who knows who kantje will know in this universe and who he won't. Don't know how many people she can write off as ‘oh what a coincidence they have the same name’.
“That's good then, that support will get you a long way. It won't stop the ache, but trust me, having people supporting you, supporting each other, means the world in the long run.”
People in the bar didn't seem to mind their long winded conversation, more so minding their own business, paying no attention to the mourning daughter and the bartender who just wanted to listen and provide aid to a stranger.
“What about you?” Onion asked, kantje tilted his head in confusion at the question, emploring Onion to elaborate
“Your life here I mean, I feel like i've spilled my guts out and then just never asked about you”
kantje huffed lightly “Well, I don't want to bore you, it's really not all that exciting. That's sweet of you to ask though.”
“No, I'd like to listen. I'm curious, and you know- people have also told me I'm also a pretty good listener.” Onion smiled a little bit, kantje seemed to mull the question over before kantje nodded
“Alright, if you insist”
Onion in the back of his mind knew getting the other to tell a story wouldn't take all that much convincing at all.
“Well, I moved here a few years back, I live with my girlfriend, actually we live down the street from here, lovely little apartment, Rin did most of the decorating- that's my girlfriend’s name by the way- she did an amazing job. She works a little bit farther out so their commutes a bit longer than mine, but she’s happy with her job which is great! This place used to be a little family owned restaurant, but the people who used to run this place had apparently bought a new place a few hours down the track, so they wanted to sell it. I was actually pretty close with them, I had been picking up odd jobs here and there really nothing set, and I decided hey why the hell not y’know? I made my offer, they ended up taking it, and suddenly I owned a small business in the middle of town!” kantje waved his paw in a dramatic motion as he talked. Onion listened to the conversation intently, It felt nice to be able to just sit and listen.
“Now, was my very quickly made business decision taken well by the masses? Ehhhhhh. Maybe not entirely and I had to employ, hah employ, the help of a few friends, I mean Saturn and Gorb weren't really doing anything else- those are my friends for context, they're still bustling around here if you look hard enough.” kantje grinned as there was a muffled yell from across the bar that sounded relatively Saturn adjacent. Onion wouldn't exactly be surprised if almost every version of saturn had a 5th sense for when Kantje was bullying them, due to the frequency in which that normally occurred.
“The business kept growing, it's been bustling here for a bit now, it's quite popular for people to stop by. It's quite impressive if I do say so myself” kantje said proudly, Onion nodded along, asking small questions about people he’d met, or any stories he picked up from listening to people at the bar, and before Onion knew it, golden rays of light spilt from the window’s as the sun slowly began to set.
kantje paused, head tilting to look at the wall.
“Damn, later than I thought” he mused. Onions gaze followed his, as she remembered her promise to Rin.
“It's probably around dinner time, I should go, I told one of my caretakers I would be back in time for dinner”
kantje seemed to raise an eyebrow at that, glancing out the window at the setting sun “You sure you can get back home that quick? You said you didn't live around here”
“Eh I…have my ways.” That ended up sounding a bit more ominous than Onion intended, but it wasn't necessarily wrong. She did have a whole portal at her disposal
“Mysterious” kantje commented, “Do you plan on visiting again then?”
Onion paused, thinking the question over, before they nodded.
“Yeah..I think i'd like to visit again”
“Well, high chance i'll be here when you do. I’ll see you aroundd…?” kantje dragged the word out, an unspoken question.
“Onion, my name is Onion.”
kantje held out a paw, and Onion reached forward to shake it.
“Nice to meet you Onion, im kantje. Come back anytime, you were a joy to talk to”
Onion shook kantjes hand, before they pulled away, Onion pushed themself off of the barstool, adjusting their bag.
“It was nice to meet you too” Onion gave the other a smile, as kantje waved them a goodbye.
The air was cooler now, as it got later. Onion paused outside of the shop, reaching into their pocket and pulling out the red scarf.
The memory of her father was fresh in her mind, something she didnt plan on forgetting.
With a heart a little lighter than when she left, Onion wrapped the scarf around her neck, moving behind an alleyway, and summoning a portal that echoed the one her father used to make.
She had to be getting home, she didn't want dinner to get cold. She wanted to make sure she got a chance to eat with Rin and the others, that time she spent with them mattered.
The house would be empty, but that didn't mean she couldn't go in and dust the cobwebs, take care of what was left behind, do the little things that kept his memory alive.
That made the house feel just a little less empty, full of the joy and memories that existed before, Ones that Onion wouldn't let be forgotten.