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Alex is in no mood for company when a small knock comes at his door, he crashed in what could have been his best qualifying ever, but not only that he crashed so bad, his car couldn't be fixed in time for the race, the last thing he wants right now is to have to speak to another human. It's George, his anger subsides a little looking at the dejected look on his boyfriends face. He's freshly showered, long hair falling into his face.
"George, why did you come here? I'm really not in the mood." He leans across the door frame, blocking off the entrance. George doesn't even try to come in, just shyly rubs his hand over his tummy, in the way he always does when he's nervous. "I just wanted to know you were okay?"
"I'm fine George, I don't need you to come and check on me all the time, when I just want to smash something up." George's eyes light up, he has an idea, judging by the state he's in, probably not a good one. "Take it out on me Lex, hurt me. I can take it."
"Georgie no, you would let me beat the shit out of you and you still wouldn't safe word." Alex does step to one side and lets George inside, his sleeves are pulled down past his hands, he looks so small and hopeful but the last time they had tried something rough, George had ended up bleeding and he didn't say anything until Alex had noticed the blood.
"Please Lex, I deserve it after everything today." Alex takes a step towards him, and presses his head against his chest and runs his hands soothingly through his hair. "Everything that happened today, none of it was your fault, you don't deserve to get hurt over it."
"But I feel like I do, and you want to hurt me so why don't we just do it?" Hurt George he never said that? He really should say no, this is a red flag, at the very least a yellow one. George hasn't done anything to deserve to be punished, but Alex really is angry and it would help both of them.
"Okay Georgie." Alex cups George's jaw and forces him to give eye contact. "I'm going to hit you with my belt 5 times, then i'm going to fuck you really hard, how do you feel about that?" Nothing changes on George's face, he gives a little nod, Alex squeezes on his jaw. "Yes I deserve it, thank you." Fuck, he really doesn't deserve this.
"Okay, take your clothes off and bend over the bed." He does as he's told instantly, like an obedient little puppy. He's wearing an oversized hoodie, which he gently lays over the chair, his pants and boxers soon following. George bends over the bed, resting on his elbows and pushing his ass up. He looks so vulnerable it makes him hesitate.
"George, come on let's just cuddle, you don't deserve this." George rests his head on his shoulder, his pupils dilate, it relights the fire in Alex's belly. "Hurt me Alex, I deserve it." If that's what he wants then that's what he'll get. "If this hurts you need to safe word."
Alex slides his belt out of the loops and folds it in half, deep down he doesn't want to hurt George at all, but something inside of him wants to do this, a mean part of him wants to prove George won't safe word.
"Count to five with me, Georgie." Alex raises the belt and smacks it down on George's right bum cheek really hard. George squeals, his knuckles turn white from how hard he grips onto the sheets. "o- one." Alex doesn't say anything just lifts the belt again and brings down the belt equally as hard on the same spot. George sniffs, he's crying now. "George-"
"I'm fine Alex." He snaps, it makes Alex equally as angry, this time he brings down the belt as hard as he can, again in the same spot. George screams. "Red, red, red-" Fuck this is bad, Alex has really messed up here. He forgets how sensitive George is sometimes.
"Red. red. red." Fuck, fuck he's really fucked him up. "George, i'm going to touch you okay?" George doesn't respond just keeps saying red over and over again. Alex sits down on the bed and very gently pulls him into his arms. "Shh, Georgie i'm here, i'm sorry." George's body relaxes, he stops shouting red and nuzzles himself into Alex's neck.
"I'm so sorry baby, i'm sorry." George looks at him with hazy eyes, it looks like he's slipped into sub space. Alex needs to tread carefully here. "I failed Lex, I could only do three." Alex thumbs at George's eyes with the pads of his thumbs. "No George, this is on me I should have never hurt you like that."
"You can still fuck me if you want?" George is clinging onto him for dear life, he's fisting handful's of Alex's hoodie. He feels so awful, how could he hurt George like that? Why did he want to make him safe word so badly. Alex just wants to put himself into the foetal position and cry, but he's got to think about George right now, not himself. "No George, we're not going to do that."
Alex gently nudges George from where he's nestled in Alex's neck, he gives a discontented groan but manages to look Alex in the eye. "Hey, do you want a massage?" George drops his head back onto Alex's shoulder. He's exhausted, it only makes him feel worse. "Please, I would like that." George whispers.
"Come on, let's get you laid down." George is extremely clingy in his sub space and he lets out another whine at the loss of contact. Alex gently lays him down on his front on the bed, he tries not to look at the dark purple bruise on George's bum cheek.
"Lex, I need-" Alex straddles George's waist, who sighs seemingly happy with having some sort of contact back. Alex uses his own massage oil and drizzles it onto to George's broad back and gently starts rubbing his fingers into the soft skin. A comfortable silence over takes them, just happy little sighs falling from George's mouth.
The more George comes back to himself, the more Alex knows they need to talk about the scene. "You know all of this on me George, I made a mistake, a big one I shouldn't have hit you like that, I just wanted to prove you wouldn't safe word and actually hurt you, how fucked up is that?" Alex moves his hands from George's back to his shoulders, George moans, clearly enjoying himself.
"I wanted you to hurt me." George wriggles underneath him, Alex climbs off and pulls George back into his arms. "I'm the one in charge, Georgie. I had you in a vulnerable position and set out to hurt you on purpose, that's not ok George."
"But I deserved it, I wanted you to hurt me." It feels like they are going in circles. "We can't do this again, George. I can't keep you safe, I don't trust myself to keep you safe." George wriggles around again, his head slotting back into Alex's neck. "You can't leave me, I told you it's ok-" George is sobbing, Alex really keeps messing things up tonight. "I'm not leaving you silly, I just don't want to do scenes with you."
"I can live without doing scenes, as long as I get to keep you." George yawns sleepily, it's been a long day with early qualifying and the race. "What do you want Georgie?" George snuggles his body into Alex's. "I want to sleep with you." Alex giggles. "Is my baby, tired?"
"Come on, let's get you some clothes before you fall asleep, you always get cold in the night." George refuses to move, just clings even tighter onto Alex's hoodie. "No, got you to keep me warm." It's a mistake, he knows he should force George to get dressed, because the air conditioning is on high and in only a few hours time, George will wake up violently shivering, but for now George feels warm and cosy snuggled into his arms.
"Night, Lex." George lifts head and gives Alex a very lazy kiss, their lips slowly moving together. "Night, night Georgie." Alex presses one last hard kiss onto George's forehead but he's already fallen asleep.