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Tony swirled his glass, the cheap alcohol in it making him scoff internally. Pepper had dragged him along to yet another event, and he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t bored. He sighed, setting the glass on a random waiter’s tray, and made his way to where Rhodey was sucking up to one of the owners of the event. What was the event even for again?
He was stopped by a hand on his arm, and he glanced over to see Pepper. She gave him a rehearsed smile and pulled him to the right a few steps, where he came face-to-face with a middle-aged lady.
Pepper gestured at him, speaking to the woman. “This is my fiance, as I’m sure you know. Tony, this is Felicity Gaites, the organizer and top supporter of the event.”
Tony flashed his press smile and held out a hand. “Nice to meet you, Miss Gaites. Thank you for the invitation.”
Felicity nodded pleasantly and shook the offered hand. Her gaze lingered on his twenty thousand-dollar watch. “Well, of course. These kids need support, after all. The foster system doesn’t have nearly enough genuine families, and the kids themselves have less-than-ideal circumstances as is; they don’t need any more struggle.”
“Of course,” Tony replied, plucking another drink from a passing waiter. He wasn’t going to drink it–not this low-quality junk–but he wanted something in his hands while he spoke. Even after years of being in the spotlight, he still never knew what to do with them. “Why don’t you tell me a little bit more about what we’d be supporting? Where would the money go?”
Pepper squeezed his bicep in approval, comfort radiating through the gentle grip she held on his arm. As Felicity started explaining about her cause and how she was helping the foster kids, Tony allowed himself to zone out a bit. He nodded when appropriate, letting out little hums of confirmation. He knew Pepper would catch it all, though, so he wasn’t worried about hearing every detail. He had already decided to donate the second she said “foster kids”.
All of his attention snapped back to the present when Felicity said, “Are you two planning on having kids once you’re married? I do think you’d make a wonderful mother, Miss Potts.”
Pepper froze for a half of a second, then gave a strained smile. “We haven’t given much thought to it yet.”
Felicity nodded and checked her watch. “Well, I really do think you’d be good at it. Excuse me, I have to go. Thank you for your time!” She stepped away, gliding through the crowd with confidence warring Pepper’s.
As soon as she was gone, Pepper slumped a bit. Tony knew she wasn’t one to be tense, so he sent her a look of concern. “You okay, Pep?”
Instead of opening up like he’d hoped she would, though, she just faked a smile. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. Just, uh, tired.”
Tony nodded skeptically and rested his hand between her shoulder blades. “Okay. Let’s go infiltrate Rhodey’s conversation.”
Pepper let out a little huff of a laugh, barely even reacting as he guided her to his best friend’s table. Happy appeared from the crowd of people the second Tony sat down, clearly ready to stop guarding him.
Rhodey slapped Tony’s back. “Bet you’re ready to go home, huh?”
Tony scoffed. “I was ready to go home the second I put the car in drive.” Happy then gave him a look , so he corrected himself. “Ahem. I was ready to go home the second Happy put the car in drive.”
Rhodey laughed out loud, sipping his glass. Tony just set his on the table as Rhodey continued to tease him. “What, the drinks aren’t to your taste? Not expensive enough?”
“Maybe he can taste the difference, Rhodey. After all, this is only from a two hundred-dollar bottle,” Happy joined in.
“What, is today ‘Anti-Tony’ day? You guys should have told me, I would have dressed the part!” Tony snarked.
Rhodey stifled a chuckle. “What’d it be? A super worn-down, grease-stained, Black Sabbath shirt?”
Tony snapped his fingers, shooting finger-guns at Rhodey like a middle schooler. “Exactly.”
In response, Rhodey nudged Tony’s glass a few inches toward Pepper. “What do you think? Is it ‘not expensive enough’?”
Pepper glanced at the drink, then up at Rhodey. “Oh- no, thank you, I’m not drinking right now.”
His eyes widened and he smirked at Tony. “Huh. Why’s that?”
Tony immediately tried to get Rhodey to cut it out, because he knew he was just teasing, but Pepper wasn’t in the right mood for it. Rhodey didn’t see him desperately shaking his head.
Pepper straightened. “I don’t feel like it. Why?”
“I don’t know, maybe you’re preg-” Tony kicks his friend under the table to get him to stop. “What?”
Pepper stood up suddenly, grabbing her handbag. “I’m stepping out. I’ll see you later.”
“Pep-” Tony tried, but she was already gone. He sent a glare at Rhodey before starting to stand up, but Happy grabbed his arm.
“Give her a minute or two. If she doesn’t come back, then you can go find her.”
He sighed. “Yeah. You"re probably right.” He sat forward in his seat, burying his face in his hands.
Rhodey watched tensely, guilt written all over his features. “I"m sorry, man. I didn"t mean to upset her.”
“It"s fine.” Tony mumbled, his words muffled.
“No, it"s not. I shouldn"t have said it. I"ll apologize to her when she"s ready.” He pressed his lips together.
Happy glanced over his shoulder. “I don"t think it"d hurt if you want to check on her now, Tony.”
Tony was out of his seat before Happy had even finished talking.
He stepped into the hall, slipping his glasses onto his face as he speed walked out of the crowds. “FRIDAY, where"s Pepper?” He demanded.
The AI’s voice sounded in his ear, her Irish lilt a slight comfort. “According to the tracker in her phone, Miss Potts has stepped into the guest lounge on the second floor.”
He raced to the elevator, glanced at it, then shook his head to himself and bolted toward the stairs. Why did I agree to leave her alone? He asked himself.
As Tony emerged on the second floor, he huffed a bit (he wasn"t perfectly fit, okay? Three flights of stairs was not easy) and asked a passing maid how to get to the guest lounge.
With her directions, he headed down the hallway and shoved open the door, he surveyed the room for her strawberry-blonde hair.
His eyes caught in the corner, and he sighed in relief. He didn"t know what he"d do if she wasn"t there. He jogged over, a hand immediately going to her shoulder.
“Hey, Pep.”
She startled, bloodshot eyes locking on his concerned ones. Her breathing was faster than normal, and her hair was messed up, as though she had grabbed it and pulled in her distress.
Swallowing, she turned away. “I"m fine.”
Tony finally understood how she felt every time he pretended to be okay when he obviously wasn"t. He sighed and sat next to her.
“Okay. C’mere.” He wrapped an arm around her, and noticed how she immediately curled into him. She was shaking, and tears soaked into his twenty-thousand dollar suit. He didn"t care.
Tony squeezed her, letting her use him for comfort. He didn"t know why she needed comfort, or what was so upsetting about Rhodey’s comment, but he didn"t really care.
(That"s a lie. He did care. He just meant that his comfort didn"t depend on the reason.)
Breaking down like this was so out of character for her, and Tony was disconcerted. Something that makes her cry like this must be really bad.
Once Pepper"s tears had slowed a bit, but she still hadn’t moved from her curled-up position, he carefully removed his arm from her shoulder and started working at her hair clips. He knew that having her hair pinned up like it was, with the added stress of crying, would make her head hurt.
After her hair was loose, Tony ran his fingers through it a few times and kissed her head. “What"s wrong, Pep?” His voice was soft, barely audible.
“Nothing,” she whispered, and he dropped his head back to look at the ceiling. How could he go about this?
“Pepper, love of my life. Let me help. Please.” He cupped her cheek and searched her eyes for some hint of what was going on, but nothing came to light.
“Can we go home first?” She looked so sad, so broken, that he couldn"t help but agree.
“Okay,” He helped her up, pulling her close as they walked. “Do you want me to drive, or should I call Happy?”
“Let"s… Can you drive?” She hummed softly.
“Yeah.” He pulled her towards the elevator, then pressed the star to head to the lobby. “Happy probably parked in the front,” Tony murmured. He knew exactly where the car was; he"d bought a spot in this lot, so it quite literally had his name on it. He just didn"t feel like that was appropriate to bring up right now.
Once they were home, they settled on the couch, Pepper resting her head on his shoulder.
“You want any water or anything?” He suggested, knowing she"d be dehydrated after the crying she"d done.
After she shook her head, he asked if she wanted to tell him what was wrong.
Her lashes fluttered and her lip trembled, but she gave in. “I lost my baby. A few years back.”
He inhaled sharply, his hand stilling. “Your baby?” He nudged gently.
“I had a son. He d-died in his sleep when he had just turned one.” She stumbled over her words, barely able to speak it out loud.
“Oh, Pep…” He couldn"t imagine the pain of losing a child. Let alone being told how good of a mom she’d make.
Tears sprung to his eyes, and he sighed.
She pressed her face into his chest. “I miss him. And it hurts to be told over and over how I could be a good mom, because I was . At least, I think I was. He was the sweetest little boy. But he had severe sleep apnea, and I didn"t notice in time. He just… stopped breathing. By the time I got there, he was- he was gone.”
She sobbed again, and Tony let his own tears fall. He buried his nose in her hair. “I"m so sorry.”
“I want kids, and I know I"d be able to, but… knowing that he missed out on his entire life… it"d be so hard to raise another.”
Tony nodded. “We don"t have to try. I"m not sure I know how to be a dad anyway.”
“You"d be such a good dad.” Pepper huffed a small laugh, as if it was all a joke. “Tony, you"re the perfect father to Peter already.”
He scoffed. “Either way. How long after did you come to SI?”
Her lips pressed together, and she let out a breath. “One or two months? I needed a fresh start.”
“Gosh, you"re strong, Pep.”
“No, I"m just-” She started, but Tony cut her off.
“Pepper, look. You"ve come to work every day for the past… however many years, and not once have you broken down over seeing a kid in the lobby. Not once have you cried because someone said you were good with kids. You kept a smile on your face while you played with kids, and while you offered to hold a baby, and every day.”
“Yeah, but-”
“You are so strong. So strong. How many of his birthdays have you come to work on, and just pretended it was a normal day? How many Christmases? I don"t blame you for not telling me. It"s not my business. But Pepper, it takes so much strength and energy to keep yourself held that high every day for so long. I"m so proud of you.”
Fresh tears ran down her face at this point, and she moved to hug him. “Thank you, Tony.”
His arms encircled her, and he pressed a kiss to her head. “I love you. I"m here now, okay?”
“Okay. Love you, Tony.”