Chapter Text
It’s almost midnight when Junhui finally arrives back in their hometown. There is no one to pick him up at the train station because nobody knows that he’s coming. He purposely told everyone that he would arrive just before Christmas, even though he booked his flights a week earlier than that to surprise his friends – and to have more time to rest, in case his jetlag turned out to be as bad as when he went to Italy in the first place.
He can’t help but smile to himself when he enters his apartment again after such a long time. He’s missed this place. As beautiful as Rome is, there is something about coming home that is simply unbeatable.
The first thing he does, however, is turn up the heating. When he left it was the beginning of summer but now it’s December and the Korean cold is not to be trifled with.
His apartment looks pretty much the same as it always did apart from needing a little bit of dusting and vacuuming, which is to be expected after more than six months of no occupancy. Junhui has covered some of his furniture like the sofa, so that it doesn’t absorb too much dust or get discoloured. He immediately removes all the covers and rolls his suitcase into his bedroom. He left his bed bare apart from the mattress which he also covered. His pillows and duvet, he hid in a cupboard so they wouldn't collect dust either.
Junhui is looking forward to sleeping in his own bed with a fresh set of covers and linen. He makes the bed and does some basic dusting then goes to the kitchen to heat a ready meal he bought at the airport in the microwave. It’s too late to be eating but his inner clock is a little wonky anyway and Junhui is hungry. His last meal on the aeroplane was hours ago, since the landing took longer than expected and he still always needs to stay in the long foreigner line at the passport check at the airport, even though he’s been living in Korea for almost his entire life. With the train ride from Seoul to his hometown included, it’s been around six hours since the last time he ate something, so Junhui doesn’t care about the consequences of eating late at night. He’s not going to bed on an empty stomach.
When he finishes his meal, he unpacks his suitcase and throws most of its contents into the washing bin. After all of that, he’s ready to go to sleep. And he feels strange, lying in his bed again. He feels so different as a person. His plans and worries were completely elsewhere the last time he had slept in his bedroom. The only thing that seems not to have changed is the fact that thoughts of Wonwoo are still the last thing to float through his head before he falls asleep.
“Are these seriously our book sales numbers?” Junhui inquires first thing when he hears the door open and Seokmin and Seungkwan enter the coffee shop for the morning shift the next day. They both stop at the door, staring at him like two deer caught in the headlights and Junhui giggles before he adds, “Hi, I’m back!”
“Oh my God,” Seungkwan says breathily, putting a hand over his mouth.
“Oh my God!” Seokmin screams, quickly closing the distance between them and pulling Junhui into one of his big, bone-crushing hugs.
Seungkwan quickly catches up with him and they both embrace Junhui at the same time while leaving cold, wet kisses on his cheeks.
“Okay,” Junhui grunts, struggling to free himself from his two friends. “I missed you too but… Urgh, that’s enough.”
“You have to tell us everything!” Seokmin jumps off of him and pushes him to sit in a chair near the counter.
Seungkwan takes off his scarf and mittens and rushes around the counter. “I’m making coffee for us!”
Junhui chuckles at his friends’ antics. “I’ve already turned on the machine…”
“When did you arrive here?” Seungkwan asks, while his hands prepare two cappuccinos and an iced Americano on autopilot.
“I’ve only been here for half an hour or so,” Junhui tells them. “I’m jetlagged so I woke up at 4.30 AM and couldn’t go back to sleep again.” He curls his lips. “I cleaned and vacuumed my apartment, did a load of laundry, had breakfast and I’m still wide awake. So, I thought I’d come here and see how the coffee shop is doing–”
“That’s all very nice,” Seungkwan says, placing two perfectly made cappuccinos in front of Seokmin and Junhui on the table. “But I meant when did you arrive in town? And why didn’t you tell us you were coming earlier?”
“I wanted it to be a surprise,” Junhui grins. “And I got here late last night… You’re the first two people I see.”
“What an honour,” Seokmin calls out. “So, how was Italy?”
“It was great,” Junhui says. “But I’ve kept you guys updated… Not much has happened that you don’t know about already.”
Seungkwan returns with his iced Americano and pulls another chair out for himself to sit at the table. “Did you wrap the course up well?”
Junhui nods. “I learned so much… I have so many ideas now.”
“So, what’s next?” Seokmin asks.
“Yeah,” Seungkwan throws in. “Are you staying with us? Do you want to open your own café?” He grabs Junhui’s arm and looks at him with a shocked expression. “Don’t tell me you want to move to Italy forever now!”
And Junhui laughs. He’s missed the two of them. Sitting with Seokmin and Seungkwan and drinking the familiar coffee blend they have around Christmas time, evokes a homey comfort like he hasn’t felt in a long time.
He shakes his head. “I’m not moving to Italy,” he assures them. “And honestly? I don’t know…” He presses his lips together looking from one of them to the other and back. “I don’t know what’s next… I have so many ideas but I’m not sure what’s the next smartest move. It depends on a lot of things and I’ll need to sit down with myself and think it all over. I would also need to talk to Mr. Jeon about certain things and…” He lets out a deep breath. “I just don’t know, so I’ll stick around here and weigh my plans and options for a little longer if you guys don’t mind.”
“Of course not,” Seokmin calls out, putting a strong arm around Junhui’s shoulders. “I’m so glad you’re back!”
“Although, you seem to be fine without me,” Junhui says, picking up the papers he was holding before his two friends jumped him when they arrived. “More than fine… These numbers are incredible. Especially, the book sales… They went up so much since I left, maybe you guys don’t need me after all.”
“Oh well,” Seokmin lets out. He exchanges a look with Seungkwan. They seem to communicate something between them that Junhui doesn’t pick up on.
“What is it?” He asks, frowning at them. “Is there something I should know?”
“Well, it’s just…” Seokmin scratches the back of his head. He seems nervous and Junhui immediately begins to worry. Did they do something unethical to drive up the book sales? Surely, they wouldn’t do that.
“What have you done?” He probes carefully.
“The truth is that I actually haven’t done much about that at all,” Seokmin finally says. “The books… That was mainly… Well, that…” He lets out a heavy sigh. “Wonwoo took care of them.”
Junhui’s heart speeds up at the mere mention of his name. “Wonwoo?”
“Yeah, you remember him?” Seungkwan throws in. “Tall, dark and handsome? Madly in love with you?”
Junhui rolls his eyes at him and turns to Seokmin again. “What does he have to do with our book sales?”
“Everything,” Seokmin confesses. “He selects them, orders them, clears out the ones that don’t sell, takes care of the recommendations, talks to the bookstore people…”
“What?” Junhui’s furrows his eyebrows so much he feels them meet in the middle of his forehead. “H-how? Why?”
Seokmin shrugs. “It just happened like that,” he says. “He was here for Soonyoung’s birthday and I was struggling with some book-related issues and he helped me out.” He looks at Junhui with big eyes. “Of course, I refused at first but he’s very convincing… And it is his parents’ coffee shop and the book stuff seems to come easy for him while we, including you, have always struggled with it. So, he just kind of took that task and now he comes here once a month and does all that stuff.”
Junhui’s mind runs a mile a minute, trying to wrap his head around this piece of information. “He comes once a month?”
Seokmin nods.
“We’ve grown quite close,” Seungkwan tells him excitedly. “Last September, he introduced us to Yoon Jeonghan!” His eyes turn perfectly round with joy. “He was here, Jun! In our coffee shop and he took a picture with a book and we put it on the recommendation table… We sell hundreds of copies of it and people come here from different towns and cities to see the place and buy that book.” He gets up and walks towards the book table, picking up a frame. “Look!”
Junhui takes the picture and has a good look at it. Jeonghan is holding a copy of Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi. It’s a popular book – even Junhui knows that – and it’s available literally everywhere they sell books. He can’t believe that people come specifically to their coffee shop just to buy it here because Yoon Jeonghan bought his copy here. Jeonghan even signed the framed picture, and Junhui can’t hide his astonishment.
“But even without the Yoon Jeonghan endorsement,” Seokmin adds. “Wonwoo just knows his stuff… He knows which books are currently popular, even which editions our clientele is most likely to buy.” He bites the inside of his cheek. “I couldn’t have done it without him. I hope you’re not mad…”
Junhui looks at him. “Why would I be mad?”
“Because I let Wonwoo help us so much,” Seokmin says in a small voice.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Junhui tells him. “Accepting help from someone who offers it with good intentions is smart and clearly, it did wonders for our sales.” And Junhui means it because he knows that if Wonwoo had offered him help, he probably would have refused it. Not because he wouldn’t need it but because he’s too proud and too stubborn to admit when he’s in over his head. At least he used to be. Maybe now he would. Who knows?
But he’s worried, at the same time. Not about the books or the coffee shop, but about Wonwoo. Junhui has seen with his own eyes how much Wonwoo works when he’s in the middle of a project. Surely, he’s had a ton of work of his own to do while Junhui was gone for six months. He must feel very committed to the coffee shop to make the trip once a month. He probably wouldn’t tell Seokmin if he didn’t have the time to come. He’d still make the trip, that’s who Wonwoo always was as a person. Always ready to help.
But Junhui wonders if in between all of that, he still takes care of himself, his rest, his health. He hopes Wonwoo doesn’t overstretch himself between his work, life and what he does for his family’s business.
“Does he take a salary?” Junhui asks, despite knowing the answer.
“He refuses,” Seokmin tells him. “He says he couldn’t because–”
“Because it would be like taking money from his parents,” Junhui finishes for him, nodding. “And that would feel wrong… Yeah, I’ve heard that before.” He lets out a heavy sigh.
Seokmin’s eyebrows pull together. “You don’t seem happy about it…”
“No, I’m fine,” Junhui says. “I just worry that he’s overworking himself… I’ve seen how demanding his job is, I don’t even know where he finds the time to come here once a month.”
“He seems okay…”
“Well yeah, he’d never complain if he already committed to the task,” Junhui argues.
“It’s funny,” Seungkwan says. “He actually called you a workaholic.”
“Pfft,” Junhui lets out. “He’s way worse than me.”
“A match made in Heaven,” Seungkwan concludes, wrapping his lips around his straw and taking a large sip of coffee.
Junhui looks at them with a pained expression. He would be lying if he said he didn’t think about him and Wonwoo at all in the past six months. He would be lying big time because it has been a haunting topic to overthink on a daily basis. Junhui wondered a lot about what would still be there between them when he returned. Has Wonwoo moved on? Junhui’s friends don’t seem to think that but he doubts that Wonwoo has deeply discussed his feelings with them.
“Are you going to talk to him?” Seokmin asks, pulling Junhui out of his thoughts. “I mean, about the two of you…”
Junhui feels strange talking about it. He hasn’t talked about Wonwoo this openly in such a long time. It didn’t feel right to ask too much about him while he was gone. After all, it was his choice to reject him before he left. It was his choice not to inform Wonwoo about his departure. It was the consequence of his actions that they barely had any contact in over half a year. Junhui didn’t think he had the right to ask too much.
He found a few things out through Soonyoung’s random updates and the very few times he talked to the Jeons on the phone. The music video that Junhui participated in was a huge hit and Wonwoo has become extremely sought-after his mother told him once. Junhui is happy for him, of course. It seems like Wonwoo can pretty much pick and choose his work these days. It must be exciting for him.
And Soonyoung told him a few anecdotes, like when they went hiking together and Wonwoo hurt his foot, so Soonyoung had to carry him down the mountain. Junhui was worried around that time, but he let Soonyoung update him on his own pace. Wonwoo’s foot has healed completely since then. He asked about it in his last conversation with Soonyoung. But other than those types of things, he doesn’t know much.
No one talked to him about Wonwoo’s feelings towards him, although, Seungkwan had just hinted that Wonwoo still has them. But how can he be sure?
“I will,” he answers the question. “Eventually.”
“Please, talk to him as soon as possible,” Seungkwan urges.
Seokmin nods quickly. “Yes, tell him you’re back!”
And Junhui’s forehead wrinkles in confusion. “Why are you two so invested in this?”
“We love him!” Seungkwan calls out loudly before he can even finish his question.
“What?”
Seokmin reaches for Junhui over the table. “We want you to get together,” he tells him. “We want to keep him in our little coffee shop family!”
Junhui scoffs. “He’s literally coffee shop family… More than any of us.”
But Seokmin just grunts. “You know what I mean…”
“When did all this happen?” Junhui lets out with a surprised giggle. “I mean, obviously while I was gone but how…?”
Seokmin shrugs. “He’s been here so much now,” he explains. “Without you hogging him all the time.”
Junhui rolls his eyes.
“And we just got to really know him,” he finishes.
“And he’s so great,” Seungkwan throws in. “I know I always gave you cheek and didn’t really understand what you saw in him… But I get it now. He really is kind and helpful and a little cute…”
Seokmin nods enthusiastically. “And he says really wise things,” he adds. “It blows my mind sometimes, he knows everything!”
“And he knows so many famous people,” Seungkwan continues. “But he’s so humble about it all–”
“Alright, I get it.” Junhui stops them. “Are you sure you two don’t want to date him?”
They shake their heads in unison. “He loves you so much,” Seungkwan says.
“We just want him to be happy,” Seokmin adds but then widens his eyes. “And you, of course, we want you both to be happy. With each other.”
Junhui lets out a deep sigh. Wonwoo has certainly left an impression on his friends and he’s not surprised at all. After all, Junhui has been under his spell longer than anyone. But he still finds it astounding – and admittedly a little heartwarming – to see how much Wonwoo has grown on them in the time Junhui was gone. He must have been around a lot. He must have helped out more than Junhui can even imagine.
And he can’t deny that his heart jumped up in surprise when Seungkwan said that Wonwoo loves him. He had hoped for it. From time to time, he even imagined what it would be like to come back and Wonwoo still has feelings for him. But he never let himself take that for granted. The fear that his feelings have changed with the seasons lingered over Junhui’s head, present at all times. He didn’t know what he would return to. He still doesn’t know how much of Seungkwan’s words he can trust.
Maybe Wonwoo said something along those lines months ago when their separation was still fresh, and Seungkwan remembered it. Because Seungkwan remembers everything, especially when it comes to strong emotions. Junhui doesn’t know how much Wonwoo truly shared with his friends and how much it might just be the two of them reading into things as they did before.
“Just promise that you’ll talk to him,” Seungkwan insists.
And Junhui laughs. “Of course, I’ll talk to him,” he says. “But I gotta say, you two are weirding me out a little bit.” He gets up from his seat. “Now, look at the time,” he adds. “We need to get ready to open up.”
“Oh God, yes,” Seokmin agrees, standing up in a hurry and taking his jacket and bag to the back office.
“I’ll help Seungkwan at the counter for the morning rush,” Junhui says, following Seokmin. “And then you and I need to sit down to go over the numbers for the last six months. I want to be up to date by the end of the day.”
“Yes, of course,” Seokmin agrees.
Junhui leaves the papers in the office and wears an apron when he returns to the counter. He fills the coffee beans while Seungkwan puts away his stuff and finds an apron for himself. When he returns, he softly smiles at Junhui. “It’s good to have you back.”
And Junhui grins back at him. “It’s good to be back!”
Junhui takes a better look at the books on the coffee shop shelves in the late afternoon. After having spent the majority of his morning going over all the data with Seokmin, he concludes that the café is doing just fine. Seokmin has done a great job running the place in his absence and Wonwoo having a hand in the book department has certainly improved their revenue by a lot. But it made Junhui curious to see what kinds of books Wonwoo had ordered for them to sell.
There’s still a wide variety. A lot of classics but also new – and probably – trendy novels fill up the most space. But Wonwoo has included a larger section on self-improvement and what Junhui would consider esoteric literature. He’s also seen that some of those books have sold a lot. At the very front, there is a section labelled ‘Gift Ideas’ and currently, it’s filled with Christmas-related literature and cosy pieces.
Junhui can’t help but smile with each book he picks up to peruse. They have been clearly selected with care, with a purpose in mind. It’s not at all surprising that they’ve been doing so well.
He completely loses all sense of time and space as he submerges himself in the selection. But when he finally reaches the table with the monthly book recommendations, his concentration is pierced by the most familiar voice. Like a needle through a balloon, Wonwoo’s voice cuts through all the noise in the room and Junhui’s head shoots up immediately to find him standing at the counter, talking to Seungkwan.
“Hey, how are you? Where’s Seokmin?” he asks. “I need to talk to him. My train was late so I didn’t have time to stop by earlier but I was just at the bookstore. I had a meeting with their IT guy about the website and–”
“Wonwoo,” Seungkwan stops him with big eyes, looking at Junhui over Wonwoo’s shoulder.
“What?” Wonwoo wonders. “Did something happen?”
Seungkwan only nods his head in Junhui’s direction and Junhui’s heart jumps into his throat when Wonwoo finally turns around and sees him.
He still holds a book in his hands when he approaches Wonwoo with careful steps. And Wonwoo seems to be incapable of forming any words as he stands there and stares at Junhui as if he’d just seen a ghost.
“H-hi,” Junhui greets shyly. Who would’ve thought that after everything that happened between them, he could still be shy in front of Wonwoo? “I got back yesterday,” he adds as a piece of information that would explain why he’s suddenly standing in the coffee shop.
But Wonwoo seems to have lost all ability to speak or move. The only thing that shows he’s still alive is his eyes which follow every movement of Junhui’s as he comes closer to the counter.
And it’s almost painful how long it takes for Wonwoo to react at all. “I’m sorry,” he lets out after the longest silence. His voice sounds raspy and unpracticed.
“What…” Junhui doesn’t know how to finish the question. He doesn’t know what to ask. He doesn’t understand what Wonwoo is apologising for or why it would be the first thing he says to him after such a long time of not seeing each other. But he doesn’t get the time to think his question to an end.
“I- I still love you,” Wonwoo says quietly. He bites his lips and nods quickly. “I love you.” It comes out breathier the second time and is followed by a sharp inhale.
And Junhui doesn’t expect him to just turn around and walk away afterwards. But the door of the coffee shop opens and closes and Wonwoo passes through it without another word while Junhui’s heart bounces off his ribcage threatening to find a way to jump out.
The guilt pulls at him like an anchor tied to his foot. Stronger than gravity, it keeps him on the ground, keeps him from moving, keeps him from following Wonwoo out of the door. Junhui stays in his spot for several minutes after Wonwoo leaves.
It takes Seungkwan’s scolding tone to shake him out of his shock. “Go after him!” He says with a serious expression.
“Huh?” Junhui lets out unintelligently. His heart might be on a roller coaster but his brain is still processing what had happened.
“I swear to God, Wen Junhui,” Seungkwan’s tone is threatening now. “If you still doubt him and let him go, I might just have to try my own luck with him.” He points a flat hand at the door. “That man is a catch!”
“No,” Junhui quickly tells him.
“What do you mean no?” Seungkwan’s voice is shrill. “He has–”
“I mean, no,” Junhui interrupts him, finally getting a grip. “You can’t have him.” He puts the book down and quickly heads to the office where he left his jacket and beanie.
“Oh, finally,” he hears Seungkwan say when he passes him again on his way out. A few guests who were sitting near the counter start applauding and Junhui’s whole face heats up when he rushes out of the coffee shop and takes a turn in the same direction Wonwoo went.
He doesn’t see him anymore, however, and for a second, Junhui contemplates getting his car and driving up to Wonwoo’s parents’ house. But then he remembers that he hasn’t seen them in half a year. They would want to talk to him, and all he wants right now is Wonwoo.
So instead of chasing after him, Junhui takes a turn in the opposite direction and heads home. As soon as he arrives at his apartment he texts Wonwoo.
we need to talk…
can you come to my place?