Work Text:
Matilda knows that she should feel good. At first, she did. The moment the ritual was completed, she held Kat in her arms. Her best friend, her favorite person, was alive and warm. Kat gasped for air. In a matter of seconds, she was breathing steadily again. Matilda leaned against her to feel the familiar sound of their hearts beating in tandem. Matilda cried and her tears fell onto Kat’s cheeks. It felt like a new beginning; a second chance for both of them.
Matilda never wanted to let Kat go, but they needed to hide the evidence. The two of them stuffed Rip Van Winkle’s body into the guest room. She got a closer look at him. He was eerily still. He died with his mouth still open in shock. His eyes were wide and glassy. She stared at him intensely as if she was waiting for him to blink. He never did. The sight unnerved Matilda. Kat didn’t seem to pay it much attention.
She gently placed him down on the bed and tucked him in. If she tried really hard, she could pretend that he was only sleeping. It was clear that he wasn’t. They walked out of the room and Kat shut the door behind them. She then pulled Matilda into a tight hug. The gesture would’ve been comforting if Matilda could think about something other than Van Winkle’s corpse helplessly laying there.
That was someone’s son. That was someone’s best friend. In order to get back the person she loved, Matilda had killed someone else’s loved one. Was that right? It had felt right in the moment. The universe had ripped Kat away from her. She needed to get her back. Kat and Matilda were a pair. They had always been there for each other. Matilda knew that she would do anything for her. It was wrong, but was it worth it?
Matilda didn’t want to think about that. She wanted to go back to the way things used to be. She tried to go back to the old Kat and Matilda, the ones who weren’t murderers. It worked for a while. The only place Matilda saw Rip Van Winkle was in her nightmares. He lay there on the altar beside Kat’s dead body. In the real world, things were as normal as they could be in Sleepy Hollow.
Then, a year had almost passed. Matilda needed to do it again or Kat would be dead again. She couldn’t live in a world without her best friend. So, she would do it again. She would do it as many times as necessary. That’s what friends do, right? Friends were loyal and no one was more loyal than Matilda. She had already killed for Kat once. She told herself that she could do it again.
The two of them debated who their next sacrifice would be when the perfect mark walked into their lives: Ichabod Crane. He was new in town, awkward, and utterly enamored by a certain dead girl. He would be naïve enough to do whatever Kat asked of him. It was decided. He would be next.
Matilda didn’t want to get close to Ichabod. She didn’t let people in. Matilda had Kat and she had Verla. That was enough. Unfortunately, Ichabod had proven to be a good companion on their quest to find the identity of the headless horseman. He was almost a friend. There was nothing worse than losing a friend, and Matilda knew that better than anyone. She had done everything in her power to prevent it.
The time came. Matilda felt guilty but this was her friend, and a life without her was too bleak to comprehend. The guilt had been eating her up all year. It surrounded her like a dark cloud of smoke. Matilda knew that the guilt would worsen with every life that she took. She thought she could do it anyway if it would save Kat. She thought it would be worth it. It wasn’t worth it. Nothing was worth the lives of innocent people. She didn’t want to do this over and over and over again. It had to stop, but that would mean letting Kat go. She wasn’t sure if she could do that either. She had to try.
“Sorry, Kat,” she said as she returned Henrietta Hudson’s skull to its rightful owner. She hears her best friend scream, and it almost brought tears to her eyes.
Katrina Van Tassel lies motionless. Her eyes are shut, as if she’s sleeping peacefully. There is no more ivy growing. There is no way to bring her back. Kat is gone forever. She is gone, and Matilda didn’t save her. Matilda killed her. She finished what Baltus had started. Kat is dead because of her. The guilt hadn’t gone away. It had simply taken another form. Kat’s murderer kneels next to her body and sobs.
Everyone acts like what she did was okay. Henrietta reassures her before passing on. Ichabod and Brom both hold her tightly, letting her know that they’re there for her. They shouldn’t be. Matilda killed Kat just like she killed Rip Van Winkle. She is a monster. She does not deserve their forgiveness. She didn’t deserve Kat.
Matilda buried Kat herself. She wanted to have this final moment with her, even though it hurt. She needed to say goodbye to her best friend, the woman who gave her everything. When they were little, they promised to be together forever. Matilda still wore the friendship bracelet that Kat had gifted her on the playground that day. Forever was a very long time. The two of them wouldn’t be together, but Matilda would miss her for the rest of her life. She’ll always be left with the knowledge that she could’ve saved Kat. She could’ve saved her, but she didn’t.
That was the hardest choice that Matilda ever had to make. She’ll never know if she made the right one.