Chapter Text
Lilly had been crying non-stop for the last hour and no amount of rocking or singing could soothe her. Kenny and Eren were in the kitchen, trying to make her a bottle.
“Shhh....Dinner will be ready soon.” I whispered to her, rocking her a little. I felt broken, shattered, completely out of place. The funeral had been hard, and though Hanji and the others didn't want to leave us, we decided it would be best for Lilly to be away from most of the commotion. The two returned with a triumphant look on their faces.
“We melted one bottle, before we figured it out, but we've got it.” Eren said with a smile. He said next to me on the couch and held his arms out. I handed Lilly over and he held the bottle to her lips, which she accepted greedily. “There we go.” Eren said with a yawn. I leaned my head on his shoulder with a tired sigh. There were boxes everywhere, filled with most of Lilly's things. Kenny had been working on moving things around the old house, though the stairs had been a challenge. I stood up as he started to carry another box upstairs.
“Levi, just rest a little. You've had a hard day.” I felt my lip quiver and I couldn't help but nod. I felt like I could have another break down at any moment. Kenny gave me a small smile, before heading up stairs. I sat back down next to Eren and hid my face in my hands.
“I just want her to be able to sleep in her crib tonight.” I said sadly. “I know she's got to be exhausted. She hasn't even had a nap.”
“She slept on the car ride over at least.” Eren said as he offered me a smile. “Kenny's right though. You're worn out. Let us take care of it, babe.” I gave in with a nod. “Go ahead and sit in the chair.” I sat in the chair and in between boxes, Kenny threw a throw blanket over my lap. Eren handed off Lilly and pressed a kiss to my forehead. “She should finish her bottle soon. I'll go finish up the crib.” I nodded and pulled her close. I watched as Eren climbed the stairs and I looked down at the perfect little bundle in my arms. She was perfect. Vibrant green eyes and bright red hair, just like Izzy. Before I knew it, she had finished her bottle and she was falling asleep in my arms.
It wasn't long before Eren was walking downstairs, his hair pulled back into a ponytail.
“We got the basics done. Changing table and crib.” He whispered. He glanced at the clock and nodded. “It's about time for her to sleep anyway.” I nodded and stood up, following Eren up the stairs. She stirred a little, but not much. I placed her gently into the crib, before taking a step back to look at the progress. Kenny had turned the unused study into a nursery for Lilly. Our room was right across the hall, so we would be close. There were still boxes everywhere, but at least our little girl had a place to sleep tonight. We tiptoed out of the room, leaving the door cracked behind us.
“I know you've had a lot of pizza already this week, but I'm beat. Is that okay for dinner?” Kenny asked as he sat in the recliner, cell phone in hand.
“I could eat cardboard at this point if it tasted good enough.” Eren said with a chuckle. “Levi, come upstairs with me for a bit? I think a shower sounds amazing.” Eren said as he walked back towards the stairs.
“You two take your time. I'll listen for Lilly. She was out like a light, though.” Kenny said with a smile. I followed Eren upstairs to our room. It looked like a disaster zone also. It's not that it was a small room, its just that there was stuff everywhere. Old furniture, our suitcases and the twin size bed. “Hopefully we can get a bigger bed in a few days.” Eren said as he dug through his suitcase. “Not that I mind snuggling with you.” I couldn't help but smile.
“Forced snuggling isn't as nice, love. It's fine until someone ends up falling off the bed or with an elbow in their ribs.” He chuckled as he pulled clean clothes out.
“True, true. Want to shower together? Save water?” I felt my cheeks heat up and I fiddled with the zipper on my suitcase.
“But Kenny...” Eren grinned and wrapped his arms around my waist, clean clothes resting against my back.
“Knows we are married.” I worried at my lip for a moment and looked towards the door.
“Lilly-” Eren raised his eyebrow up and gave me that look.
“Uncle Kenny has it under control for half an hour, babe. It's fine.” I let out a breath and nodded, before gathering my own clothes. We walked down the hall to our bathroom and shut the door behind us. At least the house had two bathrooms. We both stripped quickly, tossing our clothes into a pile on the floor. Eren started up the shower and pulled me into his arms.
“Mhmm...as beautiful as ever.” Eren pressed a kiss to my neck, before pulling away with a grin. I reach up and pulled the tie free from his hair and placed it on the sink. I hugged Eren close for a moment, letting my cheek rest against his chest. “Everything will turn out fine, Levi.” I bit at my lip for a moment. So Eren could read my mind now? I looked up into those vibrant teal eyes and Eren smiled. How could he smile so much, after everything that has happened? After the loss. The grief?
“You practically led a whole army, Levi.” Eren said firmly. “And you managed to handle the attitude of a teenage brat like me back then as well, while trying to avoid getting eaten by titans on a daily basis. We've got this. A baby is a piece of cake compared to that.” I couldn't help but laugh as he hugged me tight. “And when it get's tough, just think of our little family. That's what's been getting me by.” His expression turned soft and he buried a kiss in my hair. “I love you more than words can describe, Levi. And Lilly's the same way. She's our little girl and we have a new reason to keep pushing forward. We can do this.” I felt my eyes sting with tears, but they refused to fall. My eyes were tired from crying. Tired from the sorrow, the sadness. I nodded and Eren tugged me into the shower. The hot water felt great against my back and Eren's arms around me felt even better.
This shower had nothing to do with sex, but everything to do with reassurance and care. Eren was holding my close, pressing soft kisses against my face and neck.
“What if I have a panic attack while I'm watching her?” I said sadly.
“I'll be right there to help. I'm not going anywhere, Levi.” I nodded and fell silent, Eren working carefully as he washed my hair. We showered slowly, taking our time to let the water soothe us and wash the horrible day away.
By the time we were dried and dressed, the pizza had arrived. Lilly was still snoozing quietly in her room and I cuddled up with my husband on the couch under a big blanket as we ate from the box. Kenny looked exhausted as well. We could all use some sleep.
“So what's the plan? Want to try and finish up the nursery tomorrow?” Eren nodded, before swallowing a mouthful of cheese pizza.
“Yeah. Hopefully we can get it finished. Will you be alright watching Lilly for the day? I'll help of course.” I nodded as I munched on my own slice.
“Sounds good.” Kenny said as he grabbed another slice of pizza. “Then we can work on your room some. I know there's a lot of junk in there. We need to make room for a decent bed for you two.” Eren nodded and stretched his legs out a bit, pulling me between his legs and wrapping an arm around my middle.
“I'll try to order a bed and mattress to get it delivered soon.” I said sleepily. We finished up our pizza quickly and soon after we were all headed to bed, more than ready to sleep. Eren had tiptoed into Lilly's room to set up the baby monitor and he shut both doors, placing the monitor on my old dresser.
I sat on the edge of the bed, hands nervously playing with the hem of my (Eren's) t-shirt. Eren climbed into bed and pulled me into his arms, before pulling the covers up over us.
“What's on your mind, Captain.” Hearing that name brought back so many memories, but I couldn't help but love it.
“What about Japan? Our house? Your schooling?” Eren fell silent for a moment as if in deep thought.
“Truthfully?” I nodded, though I wasn't sure he could see that in the slivers of moonlight that were creeping in through the curtains. “Truthfully, I love our home and I love Japan, but our family is here Levi. Kenny and the others. I can always switch to Trost University.”
“You really want to be in classes with crazy four eyes?” I said with a smile.
“Marco goes there too! It'll be fine, Levi. There's lots of memories in that school.” I nodded and tucked my head against his chest. Eren moved a bit to rest his chin right on top of my head.
“As for my work, I can always work remotely. It's not a big deal.” Eren nodded against me. “We can either sell the house or keep it as a vacation home I guess.”
“Why don't we just sell it? We've got the house in Paris.” I nodded and sighed against Eren. “We'll have to plan a trip in a few weeks to go and pack everything up. Ship our stuff back.”
“We've got plenty of available baby sitters.” Eren said with a smile. “Now that that's settled...” Eren pulled back a bit and pressed a soft kiss to my lips, which quickly deepened, though it didn't last long. We were both too exhausted to even think about sex. “Get some rest, babe.” I nodded and snuggled close, resting my head right against Eren's chest. “Sweet dreams.”
“Sweet dreams, Eren.”