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It's only fake for as long as you say it is

Chapter 7

Notes:

Finally!

This has to be the longest, most drawn-out fic publication I've ever done - and I’m honestly not even sure why! I've just found bits and pieces to edit over and over, should've sorted it before I started to put out the chapters.

Big apologies for the wait, and if you find yourself needing to read through previous chapters to remember what this is all about - sorry again.

To everyone who stuck around patiently - thank you! You're the best. 😊

Now, let’s dive into the final chapter - hope you enjoy it!

Love,
K.

Chapter Text

 

The next morning it turns out that they are pretty bad liars, both of them.

For Harry, it’s about his calendar.

Because it’s not easy to wipe it clean when your name is Harry Styles. To be honest, it’s almost impossible - especially during a charity weekend when you’re expected back at the venue by lunchtime to present the winner of his own contribution to the charity auction: a day and night with him.

And for Louis, it’s about his sex-drive.

Because last night, Harry is pretty sure Louis tried to convey that he could hold back and effortlessly control his sexual urges, aiming to romantically ease them into their newfound sex life instead of rushing things on their first intimate time together. Apparently, in Louis’ opinion, one blowjob each had been perfectly sufficient, even if there clearly was a promise of more fun to come today.

Well, that honourable restraint lasted exactly a few hours, namely until Louis woke up crazy-early this morning, being desperately horny, and wanted to give Harry another blowjob. Apparently having had enough of that self-control shit.

Needless to say, Harry would’ve been the last person on earth to complain when Louis lubed up his fingers again and used them in a delicious way to get Harry off. Again. And just when Harry almost a bit shocked realised that it would be enough for him to come only from his fingers, Louis dived in and sucked him in that insane way Harry knows he soon will become addicted to, and he obviously was a done deal quickly after that.

To his satisfaction, Louis allows him to reciprocate, but he keeps his fingers out of the equation once again, sensing that this is how they will play it until Louis decides to reverse their roles. This works perfectly for Harry - more than perfectly, in fact. From the very beginning, their dynamic has been thrilling, and he suspects it will only get more and more and more exciting.

The problem of not truly being able to clear his calendar completely for a day of shenanigans with Louis, is woven together with Louis’ uninterest to stick to his taking-it-slow intentions from last night - and it all comes to a head when a couple of hours later Louis is at it again, waking Harry up by sliding up against his back and press his full erection against one of his ass cheeks in an unmistakeable way.

“Baby…?” Harry slurs, still half-asleep, although he’s returning to consciousness in no time at all as soon as he realises what’s going on here.

Apparently, his cock got the memo way before his brain managed to wake up and is already achingly hard. Which he becomes very aware of when Louis’ hand sneaks around his waist and gently wraps around it. His body jolts in pleasure when Louis touches him and he lets out an unrestricted, pleasured moan.

Jesus your morning boner is to die for… Never felt anything bigger…harder…” Louis hisses dirtily in his ear from behind, slowly starting to stroke him as he softly rolls his hips against his ass at the same time.

“Your sex-drive is to die for…” Harry counters with, finding himself smiling so, so wide.

Because he couldn’t ask for anything more than this. Honestly.

“Hope you’ll be able to keep up with me…” Louis mumbles suggestively and lets his hand slide down to massage his balls for a couple of seconds before it comes back to stroke his length, a bit more determinedly now.

“Thought you were one for starting out slow…” Harry almost has something teasingly in his voice, but he just can’t help himself.

He knew it. He knew they’d be a perfect match even in bed, he actually never had any doubts whatsoever.

“We did, didn’t we?” Louis bites down on Harry’s shoulder and then gives him a soothing kiss there. “Just wanted to test your self-control. But…” He finds his earlobe and sucks it into his mouth for a brief moment. “…now I think it’s time we embrace our wild side, hm?”

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

Harry can’t hold back a gasp, and then a laugh…because what the hell has he done to even deserve this? To deserve Louis??

“Yeah, let’s fucking do that.” He whispers, the warmth of his smile clear in his voice, but there’s also coming through a much darker tone in it as well. “Right now.”

He turns in Louis’ arms, who effortlessly continues to stroke him the whole time. Once they’re facing each other, they share a long, lingering gaze and Harry’s hand glides down Louis’ back, coming to rest on his ass cheek, where he takes a teasing handful and squeezes firmly.

Then Harry feels Louis wedge his leg in between his thighs, spreading them slightly and making it easier for him to access a couple of fingers between his ass cheeks. And they’re already lubed up – when the hell did he manage to do that?

Two fingers slide in before Harry even realises what’s happening, forcing another unrestrained moan of pleasure out of him. Burying his face in the crook of Louis neck, Harry reflexively squeezes Louis’ ass cheek again, way harder this time.

“Relax…” Louis whispers against Harry’s hair, fingers slowly sliding in and out. “Won’t do anything you’re not ready for. This is nice. We’ll see we’re it goes.”

Harry bites his lower lip, shaking his head almost imperceptible.

“You have no idea how ready I am babe…”

They share a soft chuckle at Harry’s desperate words, while Louis simply hums, as if content to let the unfolding events decide the outcome.

“No. I mean it.” Harry is well beyond indecision; he craves this more than he’s ever wanted anyone or anything, and he wants it right now. “Want you inside me, Louis… Want it so much… Just…fuck me please, I’m so ready…”

Perhaps he’s rambling but he’s so convinced the time is right and if they both want this, why should anything hold them back?

He’d lie if he said he wasn’t nervous, because he is. But scared? No. He trusts Louis completely, and he’s more than sure there’s no one better than him to guide him through this slightly new and unfamiliar, for the first time in ages.

“You’re sure? Obviously don’t wanna talk you into something, Harry, I just… I just have a very strong feeling it would be fucking awesome for a first time for us…”

Every single boy he’s been with for two years straight have assumed that Harry wants to top. He has, of course, only himself to blame, as those are the signals he’s been sending. He has convinced himself that this has been his true preference. He’s also believed that he preferred girls.

Right now, though, he’s pretty damn sure he’s misled himself in both those areas, since the feeling of wanting Louis up his ass is overwhelming.

“Yeah, I agree.” Of course he thinks it would be awesome, and the words flow effortlessly from Harry, his mind very much set on a singular path. “Wanna do it, wanna bottom. I’m ready, I told you.”

If he was slightly hesitant about the idea when Louis first came up with the suggestion, there’s no trace left of that hesitation now.

Lifting his leg and hooking it over Louis’ hip, Harry offers all of himself for Louis to possess, feeling himself relaxing fully into it. A third finger finds its way inside of him, and Harry finds Louis lips in return, and everything’s starting to just get really fucking hot.

It’s right about then, when Harry breaks away for a second to catch his breath, that his gaze lands on the old-fashioned clock hanging on the wall right next to the bed, and-

“Oh FUCK!” He blurts out and shoots up to a sitting position, feeling Louis’ fingers slide out of him as he makes a surprised, almost annoyed sound, followed by:

“Harry, what the-?” His eyes are alarmed and follows Harry’s gaze to the wall and the clock.

“Fucking hell, it’s past eleven!” Harry exclaims, something wild overtaking his face. “We must be back at the venue at noon, we need to get going! Jesus, Louis, get up! Up!”

Louis looks completely lost as he watches Harry roll out of bed and stumble towards the ensuite.

“Victoria will kill me if I mess up this charity event, she has fucking ingrained in me that it’s very high up there in importance… I just can’t not show, it’s not even a possibility…” He says as he turns around and walks backwards towards the bathroom so that he can keep eye contact with Louis. “I’d be slightly worried myself if I were you… You - and your boss – are in fucking charge of me. You should be the one making sure I’m on time for my commitments…”

The words might sound slightly accusing, but they’re not meant to be, and he’s got a smile (stressed, but still) on his lips.

“I thought it was 1 PM!” Louis blurts out. “I counted on us being done by then…”

“So you knew the time?! What the fuck, Louis!”

Louis shrugs and get out of the bed as well, following Harry into the bathroom.

They’re both half flagging now and there’s absolutely no point whatsoever to get themselves going again – it would be straight out counterproductive, really – so Harry hurries into the shower, as Louis takes a wee and then brushes his teeth.

When Harry is almost done, Louis steps inside and immediately reach for the bottle of hotel shampoo, apparently planning on being nothing but efficient. But when Harry turns around and wipes his eyes free from water, seeing Louis standing there with closed eyes and the shower jets thrumming down over his head, nothing else but this feels important.

And he cannot pass up on the opportunity.

It must’ve punched some air out of Louis’ lungs in sheer surprise, as Harry steps up to him and puts his arms around his neck, because Louis doesn’t say anything, and that doesn’t happen often.

They stay in the warm, tight, wet embrace for several minutes, even if there’s no time for it at all. Just swaying from one foot to the other, hands sliding up and down each other’s backs, they’re deliberately taking their time and allow themselves to truly feel every moment of what they’re experiencing right now.

Strangely enough it feels like one of the most intimate moments there has been between them, so far – it really is a beautiful, Harry thinks – and then they’re not even doing anything of a sexual nature.

But. Time is short, and in the end, they really need to get moving. Still, both sighs longingly when they part and Harry backs out of the shower. And if their cheeks are rosy Harry doesn’t think it’s solely because of the hot water.

Throwing Louis gorgeous body and mouthwatering semi a last gaze, Harry grabs a towel and finally shifts into a higher gear, hurrying to get himself ready for the last part of the charity ball.

*

The charity ball lunch is nice and calm.

Even if it disturbed their day in bed.

It’s all the familiar faces from last night and it’s actually quite nice to pick up on a few interesting conversations they’d had, and when the worst frustration has left their bodies, it’s ok.

Even if it disturbed their day in bed.

Their forgiving mood may have something to do with the knowledge of them heading straight back to Louis’ hotel room, which apparently is already booked for another night.

Thrill.

And there’s also a significant difference from yesterday. He’s walking around this venue, before they’re expected to take their seats, holding his boyfriend’s hand.

Boyfriend.

They’ve been sexual with each other, it’s been freaking amazing, and they’re about to go all the way when getting back to the hotel room. There’re no ambiguities about how they’re going to do it either and Harry can’t fucking wait. Double thrill.

Feeling like a teenager again, about to lose his virginity, he excitedly counts down the minutes until the lunch – and event – is over. He can tell Louis does too, and he’s a hell of a flirter when being in that mood, apparently.

He’s getting Harry completely flabbergasted at more than one occasion, when whispering highly inappropriate things into his ear during their starters. And it doesn’t stop with that, he also touches Harry very suggestively when no one – hopefully – isn’t watching. It’s a dirty, very sexy boyfriend he’s been dealt with, and Harry doesn’t want it in any other way. Honestly, he can’t ask for more.

He wants to devour him for days straight, feeling like the sexual tension and build-up is getting almost out of hand. They’re at a charity event, after all, and they’ve got eyes on them.

So, it’s sort of a frustrating but welcome break when the host takes to the stage and starts off with the first of only a few items on today’s agenda.

“Sorry, Lou.” Harry whispers smilingly as he realises what the host is presenting. “Remember, this is only for charity, babe, and now I won’t even enjoy it as much as I thought I would when chipping in the “prize” for charity. The only one I really wanna have a day-and-night date with is you.” He winks and Louis winks back reassuringly, their hands meeting under the table.

He won’t takes this personally, is what Harry interprets that Louis is silently saying, but it’s still really annoying having to date someone else, even if it’s only for a day.

“Ladies and gentlemen and everyone else, the time has come to find out the results of the lovely auction prizes!” She pauses as the crowd slowly starts to work up an applause, everyone seemingly withholding a bit at this time of day, at least compared to last night’s more light-hearted atmosphere. “Now, let’s start with the opportunity to cook an eight-course fine dining meal in your own home, with the most talented, sympathetic, and famous chef there is to find in the UK – and I dare to say in the world – welcome up on this stage Master Chef Mila Cooper!”

The crowd is growing more excited as the Master Chef takes to the stage, Harry recognising her from TV and he can tell that Louis does too. Does he look a bit star struck even? Cute, anyhow.

Then Master Chef Cooper takes over the mic and presents the winner of her prize, and when the two of them walks off the stage, to great cheers, the host is quick to announce the next prize giver and winner.

There have been fifteen auctions going at the same time, and of course, the day-long date with Harry is to be presented last. Apparently, again, as it tends to be with everything surrounding Harry, this prize is the highest valued and most sought after - but for once he wishes it wouldn’t have been, he just wants it to be done and over with.

He has actually worked up a bit of nervousness, mostly because he wasn’t lying when saying that a date with someone else really doesn’t interest him anymore. And he worries that Louis isn’t as relaxed about it as he seems to be.

Remembering when he was asked to participate – and no, he hadn’t been high, he’d known exactly what he’d gotten himself into – he secretly had regarded the whole thing as an easy, fun way of getting laid. If being completely honest, at the time, he’d been convinced that that was what was going to happen at the end of the date, and he sure hadn’t had any plans on working against it, rather the opposite.

Fuck, he’s been so disgusting for so long, and even if he now obviously won’t carry out the prize as he had intended to when agreeing to it, he still feels deeply degraded by his own acting.

When prize number fifteen is called out and Harry is asked up on the stage, the host hands Harry the mic and the golden envelope with a smirk.

And even though there have been some hints throughout the lunch, when looking back at it, he never for a second thought he would read his boyfriend’s name on the card in the envelope in his hand.

He is left speechless and can’t utter a single word for a whole minute, but just stares at their table, where Louis sits and meets his glittering eyes.

Then Louis slowly stands up and surprised heads are turning towards him and Harry realises that he needs to speak to break the confusion in the room.

“It seems my boyfriend has gone a bit possessive on me…” he says, tentatively yet fondly, struggling to stifle a smile that’s impossibly wide. “…and, in a rather selfish move, he’s snagged this prize – something he, for the record, could have every day anyway. But hey…”

“…what wouldn’t you do for love?” Louis interjects, finishing his sentence as he strides toward the stage.

Harry takes a deep breath to steady himself, before he slowly walks down from the stage to meet him halfway, because this is honestly starting to get a bit much. It feels like he could faint any second, and is that even a thing one can to from sheer…love?

The presentation of the auction winners has been going on for a while now, and the crowd has definitely warmed up to the situation. The cheering and wolf whistling is deafening as they meet in a strong hug, in the middle of the floor.

Harry shakes his head against his shoulder and whispers: “You fucker.” with a small laugh, and he certainly doesn’t dare to kiss him because he would probably not be able to stop himself from go on and snog him senseless.

This is just so Louis. Even if he doesn’t know this amazing man very well yet, he definitely knows that this must be so him.

And it leaves him with an exhilarating sense of what the future may hold for them.

*

“I can’t believe you fucking did that!” Harry cries out as they stumble back to Louis’ hotel room.

And they stumble because they haven’t bothered to detangle from the hug they engaged in, in the lift up to their floor.

“So God damn cheesy and utterly selfish you are!” He continues, voice definitely not matching his actions.

“Fuck, I just realised I may have done my job too fucking good…” Louis laughs and kicks the door shut behind them. “I’ve transformed the public’s perception of you from bad party boy Harry to straight-up nice guy Harry in the blink of an eye! We don’t even have to terminate our contract prematurely – our job is already done here! Simply nothing left to work on.”

“If you say so… You’re the professional here.”

“I’m a professional in many areas, you know…”

Their banter is momentarily put on hold, when Harry can’t wait a second longer to kiss him.

“Shit, they may actually think you’ve turned all loved up and soft…” Louis whispers, softly now, when they finally break the kiss to get some well needed air.

“Well. Perhaps loved up…” Harry slowly backs them into the room. “…but not so soft.” His voice has dropped, and he purposefully finds Louis lips again, working them deeper, slipping his tongue into his mouth and pressing his hard-on against him.

The first thing that hits Louis’ back of his knees is a small sofa standing by one of the windows and Harry pushes him down on it, straddling his lap immediately.

And he’s not feeling cautious at all, he’s fucking determined, and he’s got a hunch Louis is in the same state of mind.

Louis hands find their way in under his dress jacket, his shirt, down the back of his dress trousers…and Harry grinds down hard on him when his ass cheeks are being squeezed deliciously.

“Get up.” Louis urges and almost shoves Harry off his lap. “Get undressed.”

“Hm, I love an eager boyfriend…” Harry hums and obeys, getting to his feet and feeling his cock strain so hard against the inside of his trousers it’s uncomfortable.

Their gazes lock as they shrug their dress jackets off their shoulders and starts to unbutton their shirts in sync.

“Wanna take a shower with me?” Louis surprisingly says when he shrugs the shirt off his shoulders, baring his gorgeous upper body for Harry to drink in as much as he wants.

But…what? Hold on a God damn minute, Harry blinks himself back to reality.

“Shower? No, Louis, no… Please, shower sex is so bloody overrated…?” Pleasy don’t say he’s into that shit, Harry thinks and wrinkles his eyebrows where he’s standing, shirt halfway off.

He’s suddenly becomes more desperate than he’s ever been, and he craves to stay where they are, just wanting to return to Louis’ lap and get this party started and-

“Says who?” Louis slowly stands up from the couch, unbuttoning his trousers, eyes still firmly locked with Harry’s.

“I. I say so.”

“Beg to differ.” Louis’ answer comes quickly. “Anyway, who said anything about shower sex? Ever heard of foreplay?”

Well. Does Louis want an honest answer? In that case it’s: hardly. And definitely not in the shower. Doing something sexual in the shower always comes after sex, no one has the patience of getting wet and slippery before sex, right?

Is this perhaps when his first doubt about Louis is about to appear? Different strokes for different folks, yeah?

It dawns on him that sex has been very much straight to the point for him for the past year. It hasn’t been a lot of neither for, nor after play, when thinking about it. And certainly not much of shower sex.

“Just sounds unnecessary complicated for some foreplay if you ask me, but fine…” Harry mutters, cringing at his own grumpy attitude, but he also feels like he has the right; excuse him for being God damn impatient!

Louis just smiles, that little bugger, and lets his hand slowly slide down Harry’s chest, over his stomach, letting a finger follow along the length of his proudly standing cock…making it twitch – accordingly pulling an almost painful sound out of Harry.

Fine.” Harry rolls his eyes.

But ok.

He may be intrigued now. Perhaps quite a lot, even.

So, he smoothly steps out of his trousers and briefs, as Louis does the same, and follows him straight to the bathroom.

It’s not like he’s never been in this situation before, going for it in a bathroom, but he can’t actually recall one single time it’s been good. Hurried, adventurous, funny, even enough satisfactory – sure – but never good.

And that definitely sets off alarms in his head again – he’s alarmed and intrigued. Because he’s not interested in wasting time, effort, or energy on anything with Louis unless he can fully invest himself and give it his all. When it comes to Louis, he’s not interested in anything sloppy. Interestingly, he’s not seeing kinky, crazy, or wild in front of him either - not now. His thoughts are focused on wanting something thorough, genuine, and passionate

Shit. Feels like another first, for crying out loud.

He has always been under the impression that once his lovers have gotten the golden ticket to his bedroom, they have – consciously or not – felt obliged to be as dirty, kinky, outrageous as possible, to make a lasting impression or whatever (which has been completely in vain since he feels no sentimentality about one-night stands whatsoever).

It has been as if those desperate people have dropped every boundary and hard nos they’ve ever had in their ordinary lives and said yes to Harry’s every desire and wish.

If Harry thinks about it, he realises he hasn’t had ‘normal’ sex (whatever that means) in a very long time. It’s always been fast, hard, rough, odd, kinky, or dirty… No lovemaking, as Louis so enticingly put it earlier. Suggesting anything kinky to Louis wouldn’t even cross his mind, nor would he want it. He’s certain there will be a time for that if they both desire it, but not now - not for their first time.

He realises that he craves exactly what Louis is leading them towards: the experience of making love. For once, he wants to truly savour sex. His whole body yearns to genuinely feel it.

Louis slides open the shower door, gesturing for Harry to step in first. Harry obeys, feeling Louis slip in right behind him, close enough that their bodies nearly brush. Louis’s hand reaches past him to turn on the water, and in that moment, Harry notices the bottle of lube Louis places on the rack. A shiver runs through him - Louis has thought this through, each touch and detail hinting at a plan to make this moment a good one.

Louis quietly slips up behind him, wrapping his arms around his waist and resting his chin gently on his shoulder.

It doesn’t take long for the water to catch the perfect temperature and they both can relax into the soft water jets. Louis slowly starts to slide his hands over Harry’s wet chest and stomach, kneading his pecs and pinching his nipples, before lowering his hands to his crotch, stroking his length and massaging his balls softly.

Then he reaches for the body wash and uncaps it, starting to wash Harry all over his body. And even if Harry isn’t exactly the shy type, and Louis certainly has turned out not to be either, he still feels his cheeks heat up when Louis’ hand slowly finds its way in between his ass cheeks. He’s being washed thoroughly for a while, on the outside with the soap, but when Louis’ other hand reaches for the lube, he knows things are about to get raunchy.

And of course, Louis pulls this off in the best way possible. Harry didn’t expect anything less, to be honest, even if he truly felt hesitant about including the shower element to the for-play to start with.

Louis manages to change Harry’s mind about it, and even if he doesn’t say it out loud right then and there, Harry finds himself internally praising the water having a wonderfully soothing and relaxing impact on their bodies, as well as it’s being incredibly efficient in the way they are getting thoroughly clean and ready for the continuation. Not to mention that it’s God damn hot with the enhanced, nice scents lingering in the humid air, and slippery hands over slippery parts on their bodies.

When Louis puts his mouth against Harry’s neck and asks if he can slip a finger in, Harry reflexively spreads his feet and hums: “Yeah. You really can.” and drops his head towards his chest with a dark groan, steadying himself with a hand against the tiles in front of him.

God knows Louis is good with his fingers. He’s so assertive and confident in the way he pushes them inside, and moves them, and how he so purposefully searches for his spot, and finds it.

Harry moans out loud, he probably half screams, but he can’t care about that now, too caught up in this wonderful, wonderful moment.

Louis keeps it up, opening him up relentlessly, kissing the side of his neck the whole time, stroking his cock with his other hand.

“Fuck, it’s so good Louis…” Harry throws his head back and rests it on Louis’ shoulder. “It’s too fucking good, I’m soon there…” He admits warningly and squeezes his eyes shut tightly as his heavy panting fills the small space in an alluring way.

“Gonna wait with taking you all the way for a while, yeah…?” Louis mumbles darkly against the back of his ear and soon Harry realises – incredibly disappointed - that Louis slowly drops his hand from his cock, followed by his fingers carefully sliding out of him.

“Oh fuck…” Harry exclaims at the emptiness, but who could blame him, really?

Being the centre of attention for Louis’ for-play is nothing short of heavenly and definitely a new favourite of Harry’s, and he quickly has been forced to change his mind about the shower element as well. He’d to this again, unquestionably. Any time, any day.

However, right now, Harry knows they’ve got other plans, and it’s not like he isn’t crazy eager to find out what those entail as well.

This is why they impatiently hurried back from the charity event as soon as it had ended, half running through the streets like two giggling, overly excited teenagers. This is why they, at three o’clock in the afternoon, wet from the shower they took and entangled in each other’s limbs, stumbles towards Louis’ hotel bed. And this is exactly why they, apparently, have this very hotel room booked for yet another night.

He realises that Louis obviously has been on a mission in the shower, most surely intending to make it so good for Harry that he won’t hesitate even the smallest bit about wanting to receive when they very soon are going to have sex… Let’s say that he’s succeeded, and more besides, because if Harry had the smallest doubts about this before, out of sheer inexperience, he hasn’t anymore.

Now, he wants it, he craves it, and he isn’t even thinking along the lines of topping anymore - it’s not relevant. Not if he can decide, not this time. He’s not scared anymore; about losing control, about possible pain, about showing himself vulnerable… He knows how good this can be, and he also knows that he can trust Louis completely.

Quite frankly, the opportunity couldn’t be a better one for him to bottom again, after all those years that he hasn’t. It’s probably been a good six-seven years since it last happened, and even if the very last time was a really shitty experience, the times before, when he had a boyfriend, had been really good.

That feeling is what he’s going to choose to remember, and to long for.

Harry’s demeanour may still include some awkwardness, because Louis, as perceptive as he is, stops Harry just short of the bed and pulls him in for a wet hug. They haven’t bothered towelling themselves, “We’re gonna be back in the shower soon anyway.” as Louis so interestingly put it.

“Hey, babe, you’re so fucking gorgeous…so, so sexy, I want you so bad…” Louis mumbles against Harry’s neck, pressing himself suggestively against him. “Still ok?”

Harry takes a deep breath and meets Louis’ body, pressing himself back at him, finding his lips for a short kiss.

“Yeah, I’m very ok…” He whispers with a dark smile, before he willingly throws himself backwards on the bed, landing on his ass, cock as hard as it has ever been.

So is Louis’, bobbing heavy, spry, hard and very alluring as he purposefully walks in between Harry’s legs that are still hanging over the edge of the bed.

“Me too.” Louis whispers and places a knee on the bed in between Harry’s legs.

In the next moment Louis is holding a tube of lube in his hand, and he uncaps it as he suggestively crawls over Harry and coats the finger on his right hand. Harry stares at his glistening fingers, and a tingle runs along his spine, when he for his inner vision imagines where they’re about to go.

They slide in easier this time, which obviously bodes very well for what they soon are about to do… Louis gaze pierces through him the whole time, and it’s so fucking intimate that Harry blushes. But it’s a good blush, a blush that somehow tells him that he’s so remarkably present in this very moment that he’s on the border of getting overwhelmed.

Then Louis slowly lowers himself over Harry, leaning on his underarm to his side, and straddles one of Harry’s thighs with his legs. That way he can press his own erection against Harry, whilst fingering him, getting some good relief for himself at the same time.

Harry feels so well taken care of, and so very safe – Louis does everything with such ease and obviousness, not shying for eye contact or unabashedly showing his own pleasure for that matter.

He obviously knew this would be different – perhaps even that he would feel a bit odd to begin with – being on the taking end of this. But so far, it’s only good and so, so arousing. Louis’ fingers feel divine inside, he clearly knows what he’s doing and surely takes this to a completely new level compared to what Harry has experienced before.

This is so stripped down and bare. Just the two of them, feeling good together, simply having sex… Nothing more, nothing less. No pressure, no performance expectations, nothing out of the ordinary

Harry is convinced that Louis is rather adventurous in bed though, when he wants to be, and that they’ve got a lot of things to explore together if they want. However, right now they’re just getting to know each other, learning each other’s bodies and minds, but almost most of all: needing to quench this insatiable lust hovering over them like a blissful haze.

“Oh my fucking God Louis…” Harry breaths out heavily as Louis sinks into him, inch by delightfully excruciating inch, all the way inside in one slow determined go, punching the air from his lungs and the sanity from his mind.

“You’re driving me bloody insane…” Louis mumbles against his lips as he stills bottomed out and waits for Harry’s body to relax completely.

Those would’ve been Harry’s exact words, had he been able to form them out loud.

“…you feel so insanely good, wanna be inside you forever…” Louis continues soothingly, nibbling on his jaw, and Harry could actually cry from pleasure right now.

It’s the kind of pleasure that he’s always found so mesmerising; a pleasure that balances on a very thin line just on the right side of good pain, and one that sends electric tingles straight across his whole body. And it throws him into a spin of arousal, making him wonder – for the first time in his life – if he’s actually going to come untouched, right on the spot.

Trying to gather himself as best as he can, Harry takes a deep breath and chokes out: “Well I’m certainly not gonna stop you…”

The intrusion just is so bloody much, but it doesn’t take long until he’s ready and urges Louis on with a subtle move of his hips.

And once they get going, there’s absolutely no turning back. Louis guides them through, with ever-increasing speed and force and when they come, they do it jointly, and Harry doesn’t think that he’s ever looked someone in the eye when he orgasms but today, he does. And it’s powerful. Watching what his body can give Louis and how it affects him. He’s stunning when he comes, jaw dropping and eyebrows wrinkling, gorgeous puffs of aroused moans slipping out of him the whole time. And his gaze so incredibly present.

It’s hard to compare yesterday’s blowjob orgasm with today’s all-the-way-sex one, but it’s at least as intense, and it hits in a different way when having Louis inside of him when coming.

Louis pulls out and ties the condom and throws it on the floor. And then he scoots as close as he gets and slings his arm around Harry’s chest. Harry moves to his side so that he can put his arm around Louis as well.

“Wow.” He whispers lowly and finds Louis’ beautiful soft eyes. “Just…wow.”

“Was gonna say the same.” Louis smiles and leans in for a kiss.

Harry quickly obeys and kisses him tenderly, and it doesn’t surprise him anymore now when Louis goes all in, even when it’s only after-play. He soon feels Louis’ tongue slip inside his mouth and catches it with butterflies in his stomach.

They kiss for a while, slowly and softly, hands in each other’s hairs, ending up being closely entangled again.

“Wanna do it again.” Louis smiles against his lips and reluctantly breaks the kiss.

“Me too.” Harry smiles back and whines softly as Louis pulls back so that they can look at each other. “Wanna feel you inside me again.”

“You’re sore?”

“Nah. You went easy on me baby… I can handle another round.”

“I may not go as easy on you the next time, though…”

Harry barks out a short laugh before getting completely serious, eyes darkening on the spot.

“Good on you, because this time I don’t want you to.”

Letting go of his typical macho traits and his usual aim for complete control in bed for once feels incredibly liberating. It surely doesn’t mean that this is how the structure of their sex life always will be, but they are in complete agreement this is a great way of starting it off.

Harry is very completely sure he wants so, so much more with Louis.

Honestly, he wants it all.

*

“I need food. Fuck I need so much food…” Harry blurts out and sits up in bed, heart still beating hard in his chest from the last mind-blowing orgasm Louis just gave him.

“I can order room service.”

Louis is still lying on his back at the foot of the bed, panting just as hard as Harry, which obviously comes from the wild and obscene ride he’s just been given. It’s been really fucking great this time around as well, so Harry isn’t at all surprised by the blissed-out smile seemingly plastered onto Louis’ face.

“Nah, let’s go out. I wanna show you off.” Harry has a smile in his voice, but he sounds serious at the same time.

Because…he really wants to do that. He wants to show his boyfriend off, as simple as that. He’s so God damn happy he wants to share it with the rest of the world – and if he tries to keep those bubbly feelings at bay he reckons he may actually implode.

“I’m bloody spent, Harry… You’re fucking wild, you’re going to kill me if you keep up this pace for the next round.”

“Nex round, huh? When’s number three gonna be?”

“Food first.”

Harry nods and scoots down a bit on the bed, nudging Louis’ side with his foot.

“Hey… Lou.”

Louis slowly turns his head and looks at Harry with glittering eyes.

“Hm?”

“I love, love, love bottoming…!” Harry exclaims almost deliriously, slightly giggling as well. “Thanks for opening my eyes again, Lou… But unfortunately, no matter how much I want to feel your juicy cock inside again, I just don’t think I’ll be able to anymore… Not today…”

“Honestly, Harry, you’ve taken me like a champ, you really need to rest your ass for a couple of days now. Obviously, I’m mourning here, but I comfort myself by thinking that soon you’ll be used to it and then we can fuck every single day…”

“Fuck, yeah.” Harry whispers with excitement shining in his eyes. “So…how do you feel about…?”

Louis slowly raises himself to a sitting position, throwing his legs over the edge of the bed.

“What? Bottoming?”

“Mhm?”

“Love it. I’m versatile. Still, I usually prefer it the other way around… Although, I may have a preference change after I’ve bottomed for you, who knows?

Sounds perfectly fair, Harry thinks, at the same time as he shivers form the sheer thought of reversing the roles later.

“Yeah. Let’s find out later.” Harry concludes and gets off the bed, heading for the bathroom. “Food first.”

*

They head to a restaurant close to the hotel, because…well, they don’t fancy wasting time on moving unnecessary long distances.

Now that they’re right at the beginning of their common sexual journey, time suddenly feels so extremely precious. Even if they’re hungry and have got to eat, they both know that they prioritise getting cosy back on Louis’ hotel room. Therefore, everything they do outside of the hotel, feels a bit hurried.

They place their food orders as soon as they get a chance, and whilst waiting for it, Louis holds up his phone and wiggles his eyebrows.

“Shall we call them?”

Harry puts down his glass of wine that he’s been sipping on, and shrugs.

“Could as well? Try and book a meeting with them tomorrow morning, yeah?”

Louis nods and dials Fray, his boss.

“Fuck, she’s so going to kill me on the spot tomorrow.” He sighs and laughs a bit nervously as he hangs up on her.

“Well, then there’ll be two sorry bastards losing their lives tomorrow. Victoria is scary when she wants to be.” Harry states as he calls Victoria, his manager.

He gives her the same short info as Louis gave Fray, that they want to meet up tomorrow morning, and that she should co-arrange it with Fray. The only difference is that he asks her to bring Aaron, Zayn and Niall. Obviously, Niall is the only one who knew about Harry and Louis’ situation before their arrangement, and now it’s time to put the cards on the table for his immediate closest circle.

“Who was she? Lily?” Harry asks when their food arrive, and Louis just has taken a big bite of his steak.

“Well, you’ve already figured out she wasn’t my girlfriend.” Louis replies after a few long seconds of chewing.

“Obviously.”

“But she isn’t famous for having achieved anything as such, really, but rather for who she is. And that is being the daughter of one of the wealthiest couples in England, and according to her parents her outrageous behaviour had started to give bad press for their companies and… Well, the gloves usually come off if something start to affect people’s money, you know, and they decided they weren’t having any of it anymore. My job was pretty much the same as it was with you.”

“What about I’m being her wildcard and that shit…?”

“Ha!” Louis blurts out over the incredulous memory. “Believe it or not, but you were. It was actually in the God damn contract. She had those two shows to go to… Your shows. And VIP:s and access to your afterparty, obviously, since her parents apparently always get those things whenever they want…”

Harry sighs and nods, obviously aware that his team – and in this case Zayn – works hard to pull influential people to his shows, being fans or not.

“…and if, if, she was to get a shot with you, I had to step back. Even if it obviously was counterproductive to what I was there to do.”

Harry isn’t sure he wants to ask, he may come across awfully narcissistic, but curiosity still wins: “Couldn’t she – and her parents - gain anything from being with me, rather?”

“Probably could’ve. It they’d chosen another approach, but the whole point with me acting her boyfriend, was to make sure she didn’t hook up with anyone. I managed to do my job - up until you showed up, that is.” Louis’ eyes go very fond. “You made my life difficult, Harry…”

Smilingly they connect their hands over the table and squeezes softly.

“Not anymore, I ain’t…” Harry lifts one of Louis’ hands and kisses it. “I’m currently making up for it and won’t stop until I’m forgiven…”

He loves when Louis stares at him like this and kisses his hand again just for the sake of it.

Then Harry’s eyes widen in sudden excitement, realising something: “Oh my God, Louis, who else did you babysit? Anyone I know?”

“Then you would’ve recognised me, wouldn’t you? And for the record, our relationship planner at work keeps careful track of us so that we’re jumping between circles that lay very far from each other. And, you already know this; there are NDA:s. Plenty of them.”

 Harry pouts, too curious a soul to settle for that answer.

“I may find a way to negotiate a name or two from you…” He declares, wiggling his eyebrows.

“If you’re insinuating a sex ban, which I, for the record, never will approve of, I’ll have you know I’d handle one way better than you, so be careful with your stupid ideas, Harry.” Louis smiles cheekily and hooks his foot around Harry’s calf under the table.

Soon they’re hanging out from the side of the table to be able to reach for a kiss, and if the kiss goes on until their food has gone cold, then so be it. And definitely worth it.

They force themselves to eat at least half of it anyway, as quickly as they can, before Louis mumbles:

“Let’s go. I really need you to fuck me now babe…”

Harry barks out a short laugh and widens his eyes in feigned outrage.

“Ok, I’ve decided not to blackmail you this time…” He then says mischievously. “…but you definitely must take back that you’d be better at handling a sex ban than me… Because I can see from miles away that you wouldn’t.”

This time, they both laugh, but a look of determination settles on their faces before they even leave the restaurant.

*

“I thought you were going to announce rehab, Harry.” Aaron says, still in shock after Harry and Louis’ revelation a short while ago. “That Louis had made you come to terms with that insight.”

Harry’s heart is pounding hard in his chest, both from the lingering nervousness from sitting around a conference table and telling everyone the truth about him and Louis, but also from the words Aaron just had spoken.

It’s been a while since they last talked about rehab, and Harry had almost forgotten about it, at least he’d pushed it to the back of his head, due to everything good that suddenly had happened in his life instead.

“Yeah, we’ve…discussed it quite extensively.” Niall adds and Harry snaps his head in his direction. “In case it didn’t work out between you two, but that I obviously couldn’t tell Aaron, so…”

“Can’t believe you’ve lied to me about this!” Aaron blurts out to Niall and Harry and Louis give each other a slightly worried look.

Harry obviously suspected that their revelation, about being in a real relationship, would stir up emotions in more ways than one, but not that there would be revelations thrown right back at him.

“Ok, calm down.” Victoria raises a hand and exchanges a look with Fray. “This is…obviously information we need time to process, all of us… But. Congratulations guys, I really mean it, we shouldn’t forget that something beautiful has happened here, even if it’s in the middle of broken contracts and what not.”

“Thank you.” Harry and Louis say in unison, and Louis comes up with a hand in Harry’s neck and squeezes softly, absentmindedly affectionate, just the way Harry loves it.

“This is the first time you mess up a job.” Fray blurts out and turns to look at Louis. “But I’ve never seen this happiness in your eyes before either, so…I agree, I guess we just have to work with what we’ve got here...”

“Thank you.” They say in unison, again.

“And for the record, Harry – and his team – won’t be sued for anything,” Louis says confidently. “if any holes need to be filled with money I’ll cover it.”

“Don’t be stupid.” Fray dismisses him. “Business and feelings don’t belong in the same sentence, we’ll talk about this in private later, end of it.”

Harry momentarily closes his eyes in pleasure from Louis soothing hand on his neck, and then reflexively slides a hand over to his thigh to rest there. For once money feels so secondary, the discussion almost comes across as ridiculous.

“We were about to make an intervention, you know.” Niall says when it’s been silent for a couple of minutes. “We’ve looked up a rehab, even booked it for you actually.”

He looks so sad and remorseful that Harry’s not sure what all this means.

“When?!” Harry asks slightly alarmed, but there’s also a warmth spreading rapidly in his chest.

“In a couple of weeks. Was going to see how it all turned out with-“

“Did you know that?” Harry turns to look at Louis.

Louis’ eyes say it all and Harry continues: “Why didn’t you say something?”

“You handled it brilliantly all on your own, babe.” Louis says softly, hand still massaging Harry’s neck.

“By falling in love…” Zayn mumbles, a cheeky gaze directed at them from under his eyelashes.

“Don’t jinx it you idiot!” Harry blurts out and everyone around the table breaks out in a laugh. “We haven’t even said it out loud ourselves yet for God’s sake.”

Harry laughs too, his laugh accompanied by heat creeping up along his neck, in under Louis’ hand.

“I knew quite early on that rehab wouldn’t be needed, but…your friends here really are good friends, you know.” Louis adds.

“At last.” Aaron mumbles, looking just as sad and remorseful as Niall. “At fucking last. We’ve been so fucking co-dependent, Harry, and we haven’t even realised until I had a quick chat with your therapist – for the record in a completely different matter, I was rescheduling your appointment – and she opened my eyes…finally.”

Harry’s eyes widen in disbelief, because…what?

“Aaron! Niall? You can’t possibly be saying that you’re putting this on yourselves…? Please tell me you aren’t. The past couple of years have been solely on me… I’ve been out of hand, out of order, out of fucking everything, and you have no blame in it whatsoever!”

“Except for being co-dependent, then.” Niall adds and lets out a deep sigh.

It’s as if he’s been told to come clean about it, to each and everyone he thinks should hear it, and Harry wouldn’t even be surprised if that’s what his therapist Siliva also has told him to do.

“I don’t even know what the fuck that- Co-dependent, that’s a fancy word, alright, and I’m not surprised if Silvia threw it right in your face, but I don’t want anyone here to blame my shit on themselves – not now, not ever, ok?”

It goes quiet for a while, but strangely enough it doesn’t feel uncomfortable, it’s just as if they all take a minute to contemplate. Thoroughly.

“Love saved you, mate.” Zayn says lowly after a while and when Harry’s head snap in his direction, he realises that his friend may not even be joking.

“Zay, what the- What did I just say about jinxing?!”

“Don’t worry, baby…” Louis interjects with a broad smile, his hand sliding up into Harry’s hair and giving it a gentle, affectionate tug. “I’ll gladly free you from your jinxed misery… I love you, okay? I love you. There. I said it. And I mean it. And I’m so fucking happy, Harry, because I love you so bloody much.”

Harry’s jaw drops slightly as the room falls even quieter - except for Zayn’s stifled giggle, which is followed by a cheeky: “Christ, Lou, why hold back so much?”

*

“I really need to thank them for having my back…” Harry breaths out the words in choked huffs. “Buy them a trip to outer space or whatever…”

“What? Aaron and- Uh! Niall?”

“Yeah. Sorted out the rehab for me and everything, should it have been necessary…”

“If you and I hadn’t met, yeah, perhaps…”

“Exactly…”

“Oh fuck! Sit up, babe, want you in my lap…”

Louis pulls out from where he’s pounding into Harry in missionary, Harry quickly sits up and straddles Louis’ lap.

But then he changes his mind and climbs off him again, to Louis’ loud protests.

“Hold on, just wanna try this…” Harry mumbles, shifting to settle back into Louis’s lap, positioning himself with his back against Louis’s chest, as he slowly sinks down onto his cock, drawing soft moans from them both.

“Jesus Christ-“ Harry exclaims as Louis cock hits him completely differently, and for some wonderful reason finding his spot dead on, over and over and fucking over.

“Fuck, this is good…” Louis groans and buries his face between Harry’s strong shoulder blades, upping the pace, chasing an orgasm that is very, very close. “Loving this position…”

“And what the fuck was all the I love you shit in front of everyone, huh?” Harry whispers, almost out of breath now, and lifts his hips slightly to be able to meet him better, harder.

The tone of his voice doesn’t match his words at all.

“Just wanted to- Aaah, I’m so fucking close! embarrass you. Obviously!”

“Obviously…”

Falling slightly forward, Harry leans on his knuckles on the bed, and Louis curls over his back, fucking into him with impressive force now, keeping hitting his spot relentlessly.

To Harry’s great surprise, he feels how his orgasm already is brewing and boiling in his lower regions, despite no hands yet involved on his cock. Must be with the almost clinical precision Louis is angling himself and thrusting exactly right into him, Harry thinks hazily and lets himself go even further, his head falling forward as well, accompanied by a long, drawn-out, aroused moan.

“Bloody love it when you let go…” He hears Louis sinful voice whisper into the hair at the back of his head now. “Yeah, that’s it, moan for me, baby, moan…”

Then Louis’ arms wrap around Harry’s chest and pulls him back up to a straighter position in his lap, holding him in place as the thrusts grow a lot rougher.

Harry’s moans escalate into sharp, breathless cries of “oh” and “ah,” but he also catches, just at the edge of his awareness, the equally captivating sounds coming from behind him – Louis, fully letting go as well.

When it feels like he can’t take it anymore, Harry reaches for his bobbing, leaking cock and groans in relief as he wraps his hand around himself. He can tell Louis is close too so he doesn’t really think there’s a point in telling him-

Louis slaps his hand away and doesn’t replace it with his own.

“Lou, what in the bloody hell-“ Harry cries out but doesn’t take another initiative.

“Just a few more seconds, please babe, can you hold back for me…” Louis breaths heavily into his ear from behind. “Love it when we finish together…”

“Jesus fucking Christ, Lou, that’s a lot to ask-” Harry chokes out, feeling an almost violent tingle of his impending orgasm spread through his middle. “You should try having your cock up your ass, and you’d understand what I’m talking about…” Harry rambles and then curses to himself.

Louis grabs his hips, almost painfully hard (bruises – Christ, there will be so many bruises) and pounds into him like there was no tomorrow, or no day after that ever again. His ass is so going to make him regret this for days - he is already sore from the two times he bottomed yesterday – but Harry himself will definitely not regret it one bit! How could he, when its pure heaven being fucked by Louis?!

After the meeting with Victoria and Fray and the others earlier today, they had went straight back to Louis’ hotel room, horny and ready for another round. Louis had seriously questioned Harry’s intention of going back to bottoming since he’s only had one day’s break from it. After Harry’s first time, followed by another, they had switched and Harry had topped for a couple of times instead, and it obviously been heaven as well. But…in Harry’s opinion, there’s nothing that can beat having Louis’ cock buried deep inside of him, it really isn’t.

“You won’t be able to walk, baby, leave it another day at least… Fuck me instead, or we can just blow each other…” Louis had kind of pleaded.

A little soreness definitely doesn’t put Harry off, though, and after having done some persuasion, well…here they are. Harry is riding Louis in reverse, both still sitting up in the idle of the bed, and-

-Harry is coming like crazy. Thankfully Louis is too, since he was so eager for them to come together. Truth is, Harry wouldn’t have been able to hold back even a second longer, but apparently that was what it took for Louis to get there as well, and now they’re experiencing yet another earthshattering orgasm, connected in the closest way possible. It’s so strong and blows Harry’s mind so hard he isn’t even sure he can be held account for screaming: “I fucking love you Louis Tomlinson!” but there he goes and in the next moment Louis is giggling absolutely adorably and Harry doesn’t regret a thing.

Louis pulls out immediately afterward, Harry assumes out of consideration for his poor asshole, which…probably is a good thing right now, even if he feels ridiculously needy of Louis physical closeness. Falling face first into the mattress, Harry pants as if he’s run a marathon. Louis soon slumps down over his back, kissing the side of his face tenderly.

“You’re amazing.” Harry hears Louis whisper against his cheek. “I’ve never…” He drags his lips softly against Harry’s damp skin. “…ever…” A hand caresses feathery along his arm. “…had a better lover than you, Harry... Hands down.”

Harry smiles broadly into the pillow, Louis’ words making him feel far happier than he’d expected. To be fair, his confidence has always been ridiculously good, and obviously only solidified as his popularity has grown, but he also has times when he wavers, and in his case it’s always about if people truly mean something or if they say it because…well, because he’s Harry Styles. He knows that Louis isn’t bullshitting – and right in this moment it makes him happy, perhaps disproportionately so, but he doesn’t care.

And he probably gets lost in thought for a second because he’s called back to earth by Louis slightly worried voice: “Hey? Babe? You ok there?”

Harry realises that he’s still lying face down in the pillow, quietly contemplating his love for Louis – and for his life in general – and has forgotten to respond to Louis’ lovely words.

“Harry?” Louis insists softly, and Harry can feel his mouth close to his ear now. “Baby? Fuck…you ok? Was I too rough…?” And now Louis actually shakes Harry’s arm. “Was I?

And finally, Harry comes to life and quickly lifts his head from the depth of the pillow, threatening to knock Louis in his face, but luckily, he skilfully parries and ends up sitting straddled over Harry’s ass.

Harry squirms and turns around under him so that he lies on his back, making it intimately cosy when their spent cocks end up pressed against each other.

“What?” Harry blurts out, smile slowly fading as he realises what Louis actually just said. “Louis- No. No!” He moves both his hands to Louis’ hips and squeezes him for emphasis. “Oh my God, I’ve never had better sex than what I’m having with you in my whole life, I’m, like…still mentally recovering here! It felt like you took me to heaven and back, Louis, and no one has ever done that with me before.”

Louis’ eyes pierce deeply into him, as if just wanting to make sure that Harry isn’t trying to cover something up here, and since he isn’t, they soon smile at each other instead.

“Enjoyed it so much…” Louis agrees. “…loved it, even.”

A brief laugh escapes Harry.

Even? You clearly had no expectations, I hear…”

“Oh, but you’re wrong. I certainly did… I mean, a guy with your… experience… Of course I have expectations.”

Harry slaps his arm at that. Then he tickles him. But when they start to move around a bit, they realise that Harry is actually pretty wet and sticky.

“Stay. I’ll get a towel.” Louis gets off him but Harry sits up as well.

“Babe.” He deadpans and looks down his chest and stomach. “A towel won’t do. I’ve got two loads on me – and it’s only thanks to the invention the condom that I don’t have another two in me. I need a God damn shower.”

“Oh my God…” Louis plays the embarrassment card, closing his eyes and shaking his head, but Harry could tell he’s far from flustered.

“I’ll carry you. Come here…” Louis then says and scoots out of bed, holding out his arms.

Uhm.

“What? No. You’re not carrying me.”

“Jump up.”

“Never. I have legs, you know…” Harry feels a heat creep up his neck, and he knows exactly why: he has such a hard time letting go of control.

He’s still so used to be in charge, to control the course of events…

“Jump up.” Louis isn’t that easily dismissed.

“No! You can’t- You’ll break your back! And it’s…embarrassing!”

“Jump the fuck up, Harry.”

“For fuck’s-” Harry starts to scoot out of bed as well, but Louis takes a step to the side and closes off his flight way.

Then he secures a good grip around his back and finally Harry lets himself be lifted. He’s not happy with it, but perhaps he’s slightly proud that he could let go.

“I’ve lost track of time, to be honest, but I reckon we need to be out of this hotel room quite soon…” Louis mumbles on their way to the bathroom, Harry clinging like a koala to his neck. “Let’s take a quick shower, shall we, and then we can continue back home instead, yeah?”

Harry smiles against his neck and takes a brief artistic pause.

“Nah. No need to rush.”

“Why?”

“Booked us another night.”

“You didn’t?!” Louis laughs out and sets Harry down inside the shower, directing the shower head away from him as he turns on the water.

“I did. And I’ll book us another one after that, if necessary. I have a feeling we have quite a bit left to get out of our systems before we can focus on anything but…sex.”

As he takes a step to get in under the water he winces reflexively and then curses the pain shooting up from his ass. Now he realises why Louis was so insistent on carrying him. He knew, before Harry knew, that he’d fucked him good enough to leave him temporarily immobile. And Harry is extremely pleased that he’s made sure that they don’t have to walk out of this room until earliest tomorrow, and not even then should they need another day or two.

*

Three months pass in the blink of an eye - time flies when you’re having fun, that’s what they usually say, right?

Harry is definitely having fun, because hanging out with Louis is so much fun. They spend time together nearly every single day, and it has quickly become his absolute favourite thing to do. And Louis constantly lets him know that the feeling is mutual - he’s just so cute that way. His easy-going personality and confidence make it easy for him to express to Harry that meeting him truly is the best thing that has happened in his life so far.

His words fill Harry’s chest with a warmth that leaves him in an indescribable state of happiness he barely recognises, making him realise he’s never felt this way before. Not even before his darker days.

Sappy? Absolutely. But Harry doesn’t mind one bit. Luckily, they’re equally smitten - both loving to show it, to each other and to anyone watching - and it only strengthens their relationship. In just a few short months, they’ve grown so close that, for Harry, at least, it’s almost hard to remember life before Louis.

“Honeymoon phase!” He remembers Niall calling it the other day – and for the first time in his life Harry understands the real meaning of it.

They’re so in love it’s ridiculous, and they’re so horny all the God damn time even Harry blushes when thinking about how much – and where – they’ve been at it for the past months.

“A disgusting phase, by the way, if you’re not the one being in it.” Niall had loudly added, staring pointedly at Harry and Louis until Harry got the hint and removed his tongue from Louis' mouth - and his hand from under the back of Louis’ shirt.

And, alright, hearing it put like that, both Harry and Louis managed to keep themselves in check for the rest of the evening. At least while they were at the restaurant, surrounded by their friends. What happened later, after Louis roughly shoved Harry through his front door that night (and Harry a bit too easily fell to the floor on the soft hallway carpet), is nobody’s business, though.

So, calling this a honeymoon phase doesn’t quite fit if that implies it only lasts a month - because this has been going strong for three, and there isn’t the slightest hint it’s ending anytime soon.

Louis more or less moves into his house. It happens gradually, without either of them giving it much thought. Within a few weeks of ending their contract, most of Louis’ clothes have found their way to Harry’s bedroom - scattered around, despite Harry’s offer of ample space in his walk-in closet. Almost all of Louis’ favourite things have made the move as well, with Harry finding his boyfriend’s belongings tucked into various spots throughout the house.

And he loves it. He loves finally being this serious with someone, and that they’re both brave enough to embrace the domesticity of it all. They both agree, there’s nothing better than falling asleep and waking up together. But it’s also the little things - like brushing their teeth side by side in the bathroom or ending up talking at the kitchen island late into the night when all they meant to do was make a cup of tea.

Plans for the future have slowly started to take form lately as well, even if Harry deliberately has been very clear about not wanting to rush anything. Especially not in regards of making music again. He’s already fallen into that trap once and doesn’t intend to end up there again. Next time he put some music out there it’ll be his music, full of love and soul.

Louis is on his side, all the way, always supportive and understanding, never afraid of loudly defending him to others if the situation calls for it. He can push and provoke Harry pretty good as well, and Harry wouldn’t want it any other way.

Quitting his job as a “professional babysitter for famous people”, as Harry likes to call his previous profession (with a glint in his eye), was obviously a natural progression, and since then there’s been no need to rush for a new nine-to-five job.

While he’s been assessing the landscape for what he wants to do with his life moving forward, he’s picked up on things that he really has enjoyed doing in the past, which is football – and music. Being slightly hesitant to entangle every single part of their lives, Louis has so far passed up on Harry’s invitations to help him out with a new melody or some lyrics.

And Harry can obviously see where he’s coming from and acknowledges that he may have a point in regards of it’s being healthy for their relationship not to do everything they do together - even if he himself isn’t the worried about them growing tired of each other.

But. If Louis feels hesitant, or simply isn’t ready, he won’t push. Not now, but he knows he’ll bring this up once it gets relevant for Harry to get back out touring. And he hopes Louis will be ready to come with, in one way or the other.

Three months down the line it’s in the beginning of November, and Harry steps into the recording studio for the first time since that night when he desperately needed an outlet for his feelings and ended up pouring his heart and soul into a whole song, about Louis. Listening to it now, again, he can only conclude that it’s just as good as he knew it was then. There’s no room for humility; it’s honestly too good even for that.

It feels incredible to finally feel genuine motivation to make music again. On this first day for months in the recording studio, he only makes slight changes to the song dedicated Louis, and otherwise he picks up the threads on two songs he has only gotten halfway through – and finishes them. He’s on a roll and stays until the early morning hours.

“Lou, babe, please, can you to listen to this…?” He whispers as he finally crawls into the sheets in their bed, a bit clumsily bringing his laptop with him.

“Huh?” Louis stirs softly, half asleep, and Harry gently moves over to his side of the bed.

There he lies down, right next to him, smiling softly at the great feeling it is to feel his warm skin against his own.

“Can I put on a song?” He whispers but it’s so quiet in their bedroom that he knows Louis hears him clearly anyway. “Just want you to listen to this… Tell me what you think…”

“Harry… Baby. It’s-“ He grabs his phone and checks the time. “-4:45. You should really get some sleep; you have that radio interview in just a few hours, haven’t you?”

“I really wouldn’t have woken you up if it wasn’t…important.”

Rubbing his face to wake himself up a bit more, Louis then leans over to his nightstand and turns on the small lamp.

“Sure, let’s hear it.” He smiles softly when he sees Harry’s suppressed excitement. “Is it the one you’ve talked so much about?”

“Yeah. That one.”

“Ok. Cool. Looking forward to it…” Louis moves to sit up a bit more and leans against the headboard. “You’ve hyped it up quite a bit, you know, guess it’s up to the test, then?”

Harry bites his lower lip and nods slowly, because Louis doesn’t know how right he is.

He knows he’s crazy, waking Louis up like this for a song - but it’s not only that, he’s also about to do something else as well. He could’ve waited until tomorrow, or why not taken his time to plan it all for next week, but…it just feels like the opportunity is perfectly right, right now.

Not immediately realising that this was the moment he had been waiting for his entire life, it gradually became clear during the night in the studio. This is what he wants to do, it really is his shot, no matter what time it is in the morning.

Harry presses play, and the song starts. He’s too curious for Louis’ reaction to not turn his head and look at him from the side, Louis seemingly listening very focused to what Harry is playing for him.

When the first chorus comes on, Louis slowly turns his head as well and meets eyes with Harry. Harry watches him raise an eyebrow, jaw dropping slightly as well, as the song continues.

Harry nods slowly and reaches for his hand and entangles their fingers affectionately on top of the duvet, a sudden wave of emotion washing over him. Squeezing his hand back, Louis tilts his head as the full meaning and significance of the song hits him.

And what can he say, Harry is a very sensitive guy, and he’s used to get overwhelmed and heavily touched by things. But right in this moment he’s surprising even himself by how much it all gets. When he had played out this scene in his mind earlier in the evening, he’d seen himself stay strong and sure - and God knows he still is - he just hadn’t planned for all those tears to suddenly well up and spill over like this.

When the song is over it becomes very quiet in the bedroom, and they just sit there and stare at each other for a good couple of minutes. During this time Louis opens his mouth on a few occasions, but there’re just no words come out.

“I love you so much.” Harry finally says, slightly frustrated at himself for feeling so suddenly emotional.

“I know you do…” Louis finally whispers and now cups his hand around Harry’s cheek. “Is it for me?”

Harry nods and smiles through the tears, trying to blink himself back to steady but it’s easier said than done. Especially when Louis seemingly can’t hold it together either now, and he sucks in his lips to stifle the wave of emotion washing over him as well.

“It’s for you.” Harry confirms, dropping his head for a moment, trying to gain control over his feelings. “And it’s about you.” He whispers as he looks up again and gets up to sit on his folded knees. “And…the lyrics are the words I want to say to you before I…” Harry gets up to sit on his folded knees and takes Louis’ hand in his.

“No…” Louis whispers, an incredulous smile spreading over his lips. “Oh my God, you’re not!

“I am.” Harry gains new strength and pulls on Louis’ hand for him to sit up on his folded knees as well.

He slowly moves himself closer and cages him in with his spread thighs, taking Louis’ face in his hands and staring him deep in the eye. Louis’ gaze doesn’t waver; he stares right back, and it’s clear they’re both caught in the intensity of a memory in the making.

“I know it’s only been months, but I’ve never been surer, Lou. This is me asking if you can imagine spending your life with me because I sure as hell wants to spend mine with you.”

“The song is amazing, by the way…” Louis whispers almost out of breath, and puts his hands over Harry’s on his own cheeks. “"We took a leap of faith with this-“ He throws a nod between them. “-and look how fucking well it turned out... Of course I can imagine spending the rest of my life with you, baby… I can easily admit that I’ve already thought about it, daydreamed about it… I love you, Harry. Fuck, I love you so much it hurts sometimes.”

The kiss comes naturally after that, and it brings forth a few tears at first, but then it just ignites raw, wild desire.

As the kiss deepens, Harry lays Louis down under him and he really feels like he doesn’t need any sleep at all tonight. Louis’ air in his lungs seems enough to keep him going until they’re satisfied, for this time.

“Glad you liked the song.” Harry mumbles against Louis mouth as he struggles to push Louis’ briefs down his thighs, at the same time as he tries to keep the kiss going. “Better than my previous ones?”

“Have only heard your songs once in my life, and that was at the concert we, unknowingly, met for the first time.”

Unintentionally, Harry freezes and lifts his head so that their gazes can meet.

“What? You told me you were a huge fan-“

“Oh, that…” Louis smiles cheekily, lifting his head to show that he’s not ok with Harry parting them like this. “That was part of the performance… I had never heard any of your music back then, didn’t even know who you were. Sorry.”

“Wait, so- Are you telling me you didn’t take me for my fame?” Harry’s smile is also cheeky and Louis makes fake, wide eyes.

“Oh, I took you for your fame, alright, I’m just saying I wasn’t exactly floored by your music. But then I listened back on your album before that one, and the one before that and…those had me floored.” Louis hums contentedly as Harry’s lips come back on his, continuing: “And this latest song you just played for me…”

“Your song.”

“…my song, tells me that you’re right back on track.”

Harry laughs softly into his mouth, letting his tongue slip in for a while just because he can’t help himself, and then he whispers:

“I really need you to co-write with me, Lou, I can tell you’ve got a natural talent for it… We’d make a hell of an album and then we’d get on the road – for a short tour – and then we’d settle down for a while.”

“Settle down, huh?”

“Get married. Have kids.”

“The whole shebang, then?”

“The whole shebang.

Pulling down Harry’s briefs as well, Louis then makes him straddle his hips and slides two fingers inside. Knowing that Louis is checking if he’s still good to go from earlier - before Harry left for the studio - he’s content to realise that’s the case, Louis’ fingers feeling so good from the start.

And soon, when Harry eagerly pushes himself down over his length and their bodies melt together, they fall into a familiar rhythm created only for them, and for the first time in his life Harry truly knows he has it all.

Just as in Louis’ song.

It’s only fake
for as long as you say it is
Now you say it’s real
here is your song

It’s only fake
for as long as you say it is
The future
was ours all along

It’s only fake
for as long as you say it is
I knew
you’d make me heal

It’s only fake
for as long as you say it is
To me
it was always real


*