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When Song Lan sees his face up close again, he knows this is going to be one of the last moments he’ll treasure. He could never blame Xiao Xingchen; Xue Yang was tricking him, making think he was undead since he couldn’t see, but it didn’t help the pang in his heart. It had been too long since he had seen his partner; he had needed space, even if it was the hardest thing in his life. It was a lot to process that your partner in life gave you his own eyes. He needed space, especially after all those harmful things he said that he never meant.
But he came back, he always would. Xiao Xingchen was his, just as Song Lan was his. They were cultivation partners, partners for life, even if there were a few bumps along the road. He would never give Xiao Xingchen up, not for anything, but he needed a minute to breathe and now all he wanted was his partner back.
So when he sees Xue Yang, he knows he reacts with too much anger. It wasn’t just the fact that Xiao Xingchen was his, it was the fact that he just knew the man was tricking him. His partner hated Xue Yang, and it was hard for him to truly hate things, but Xue Yang took the cake. He hated the man too, first the Chang clan and then his people, his family? No one from his temple hurt him, they helped him even! And he just slaughtered them like nothing .
He saw red. And now he had a sword through his chest to prove it. He closes his eyes, so many things he wishes he could say but can’t. He accepts his fate, if he was going to die at anyone’s hands, why not his life partner’s?
And then he opens his eyes and he’s back on the path again, A-Qing by his side, looking as surprised as he feels.
“Were we not just-?” She murmurs, hand going to her mouth as she drops her bamboo stick.
“This already happened to you?” He questions quickly.
Her eyes flicker to his and that confirms his hypothesis that she’s not blind, but he doesn’t focus on that now. That could be saved for later, plus it didn’t matter too much unless she had malicious intent.
“... why?” She asks, arms crossing in front of her petulantly.
“Because it happened to me too,” he replies simply.
And the time loop starts.
-
It ends after too many failed attempts and too much traumatizing of A-Qing, but in the end, he wouldn’t have it any other way. He has Xiao Xingchen in his arms and a daughter, that’s all that matters.