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Theo sat alone in his truck, parked on a quiet stretch of road just outside of Beacon Hills. The night was still, the only sounds the occasional rustle of leaves and the distant hum of traffic from the highway. The moon hung low in the sky, pale and indifferent, and Theo couldn’t help but think that it looked how he felt—distant, cold, and so far from where it should be.
He ran a hand through his hair, staring blankly out the windshield, but all he could see was Liam’s face. He saw it every time he closed his eyes, in every quiet moment when his mind wandered. Liam’s smile, Liam’s laugh, the way his eyes lit up when he was excited or when he thought he was being clever. Theo had lost count of how many times he’d tried to bury those memories, to shove them deep down where they couldn’t hurt him. But they always came back, haunting him like ghosts of a life he could never have.
How do you get over someone who was never yours?
Theo let out a shaky breath, his fingers gripping the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white. He’d never been good at this—at feelings, at wanting, at needing. But Liam… Liam made him feel everything he’d tried so hard to bury. Every ugly part of himself that Theo had tried to forget came rushing to the surface whenever he was around Liam. He’d thought he could control it, could keep it locked away, but Liam was like a spark that set everything ablaze.
And the worst part was that Theo couldn’t even blame anyone else. He’d done this to himself, had let himself fall for someone who was so completely out of reach. He’d let his guard down, let Liam in, even when he knew he shouldn’t have. Because Liam was everything Theo wasn’t—good, kind, hopeful. Liam was the kind of person who believed in second chances, who saw the best in people even when they didn’t deserve it. And Theo? Theo was the guy who burned down everything he touched.
Theo leaned back in his seat, closing his eyes as memories flooded his mind. He could still see Liam, laughing at some stupid joke Mason had made, his eyes crinkling at the corners, his whole face lighting up with that easy, unguarded joy. It was a simple moment, one of a thousand Theo had watched from the sidelines, and it made his chest ache in a way that he couldn’t put into words.
He knew he didn’t deserve Liam. He’d known it from the start. He was selfish, greedy—he wanted things he had no right to want. He wanted Liam’s trust, his smile, his stupid jokes, and the way he always seemed to care a little too much. Theo wanted all of it, even when he knew it wasn’t his to take.
How do you get over someone who was never yours?
Theo let the question hang in the air, unanswered. He knew there was no easy fix, no way to undo the mess he’d made of his own heart. Because this was his fault—every last bit of it. He’d let himself hope, let himself believe that maybe, just maybe, he could be someone better. But the truth was, Theo didn’t even know who he was anymore. He was a patchwork of bad decisions, selfish choices, and the hollow echo of who he used to be. And no matter how much he tried to change, he couldn’t escape the parts of himself that were still dark, still broken.
People told him he could change. Scott, Liam, even Mason—they all believed it, like change was something you could just decide to do. But Theo knew better. He knew that some things were too deep, too ingrained to be undone. He could pretend, could play at being someone else, but at his core, he was still the same person who’d lied, manipulated, and killed to get what he wanted. No amount of good intentions could wash the blood from his hands.
Theo opened his eyes, staring at his reflection in the rearview mirror. He looked tired, worn down in a way that went beyond sleepless nights and restless thoughts. He looked like someone who’d been running from himself for far too long, and he hated it. He hated how much he wanted, how much he needed, how much he felt. Because feeling meant facing the reality of what he’d done, of who he was.
And the thing was, Theo knew. He knew that not everything was his fault. He knew the Dread Doctors had manipulated him, had twisted him into something monstrous. But that wasn’t the whole story. Theo wasn’t just a victim of circumstance—he’d made choices. He’d made decisions that hurt people, not because he was forced to, but because he wanted to. Because power, control, revenge—they’d all felt good at the time. They’d filled the hollow spaces inside him, even if only for a moment.
Because that was the thing about monsters—they didn’t get to pretend they were heroes. Theo knew what he was. He knew the darkness that lived inside him, the selfishness that had driven him to do unforgivable things. And no amount of remorse could change the fact that he’d enjoyed it, that he’d chosen it. So when people told him he could change, when they looked at him with hope in their eyes, all Theo could do was smile and nod and keep his thoughts to himself. Because he knew better. He knew the truth.
Who do you blame when you’ve broken your own heart?
Theo clenched his jaw, the weight of that question settling heavy in his chest. There was no one else to blame. No one else to point fingers at. This was his mess, his mistake. He’d let himself believe he could have something good, something pure, something like Liam. But Liam was the sun, bright and warm and everything Theo couldn’t touch without burning. And Theo was the darkness, lurking in the shadows, always waiting to pull him down.
He thought about all the times he’d let himself get too close—those stolen moments when Liam would lean against him, or when their hands would brush, or when Liam would laugh and look at Theo like he was just another friend. Those moments were fleeting, but they were enough to keep Theo hanging on, enough to make him believe that maybe, just maybe, he could be more than his worst impulses. But deep down, Theo knew it was a lie. He was lying to himself every time he let his heart skip a beat at the sound of Liam’s voice, every time he let himself imagine a world where he was worthy of someone like Liam.
Theo knew he was selfish. He’d always been selfish. Wanting Liam, needing him—it was just another way he was hurting himself, another way he was breaking his own heart. Because Liam would never be his. Not really. Theo could stand beside him, could fight alongside him, could even make him laugh sometimes, but he would never be the one Liam chose. And that was how it should be. Because Liam deserved better.
Theo let out a long, unsteady breath, his vision blurring as he stared out into the night. He didn’t know how to let go, didn’t know how to move on from something that had never really been his. But he knew he had to try. Because holding on, wanting Liam the way he did—it was only going to hurt more in the end.
How do you get over someone who was never yours?
Theo didn’t have an answer. He didn’t know if there was one. All he knew was that he was stuck, trapped in this endless cycle of wanting and hating himself for it. He was his own worst enemy, the architect of his own misery, and there was no one else to blame. No one else to hate. Just him, and the love that he’d never been able to let go of.
Theo wiped a hand over his face, trying to push the thoughts away, but they clung to him, stubborn and unrelenting. He didn’t know how to be anything other than what he was. He didn’t know how to be the person Liam deserved, didn’t know how to be someone who could stand in the light without dragging it down into the dark.
So he sat there, alone in his truck, with nothing but his thoughts and the quiet, gnawing ache of a love that would never be enough. And as the night stretched on, Theo let himself feel it—all of it. The want, the need, the self-loathing that had become his constant companion. Because maybe that was all he deserved. Maybe that was all he would ever be—the boy who wanted too much, who hurt everyone he touched, and who would never, ever be good enough for the one person he couldn’t stop loving.