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No, Xiao Zhan didn’t like rainy days, and he’ll cuss at whoever asks.
It reminded him of the first time he met that terrible roommate who ruined the happiness of his days. Who arrived like a hurricane into his fresh summer breeze life. During a tempestuous weather a year ago, Wang Yibo arrived at the apartment carrying a humongous wardrobe that he called a suitcase and a backpack that held more stuff than a qiankun bag.
Yibo was the ant in his soup, the wart on his soft skin, the callus on his foot, the strand of hair stuck on clear surfaces that didn’t come out in any way. He leaves wet towels in the bed and purposefully throws trash around the house when it was Xiao Zhan’s turn to sweep the floor. He was, through and through, a complete nuisance.
At first, he even thought that he could make friends with that slightly cold but very young face, but once he spotted Yibo making rice without washing it first and burning his perfectly fine pan, he thought he’d rather jump in a pool of sharks than befriend that… anarchist.
Not only the rice, he did other suspicious things too. Was he becoming too old or were young people nowadays just too senseless? He couldn’t tell. He could only face it up with a frown.
It was Yibo who made noise at 2 A.M with his action games. It was Yibo who screamed in fear whenever he saw a bug chilling somewhere, it was Yibo who poisoned his food with vinegar and laughed when Xiao Zhan tried it. More than that, he was the reason he received complaints from neighbors time and time again about the sound of footsteps at night (according to the young man’s explanation, he’s been practicing a dance for a college project once Xiao Zhan slept, and it was only after Xiao Zhan threatened to never again kill any bug on his behalf that Yibo made a pact to wake up early and do it while the other man was away to work).
It was polite of this roommate to consider his reaction, but it came out like a shot in the dark. It annoyed him further to receive these complaints and annoyed Yibo as well to realize Xiao Zhan wouldn’t budge on the distaste of having a complicated housemate even after he tried appeasing him.
A corporate designer would never understand the life of a dance student, so it didn’t matter anyway. The problem was that Yibo was a nuisance. And continued to be a nuisance. But more than that, he was a handsome nuisance.
With his beautiful body ━ walking through the house with one towel covering it, for heaven’s goddamn sake ━ and his perfect face, Yibo was the image of a sensual deity. To be honest, Xiao Zhan sometimes would stop in his tracks looking at the man and forget his work for a while, appreciating the guy’s abs, which was exceptionally fit for a professional artist, together with his smooth skin, arms and tempting neck.
But… nuisance! He was a nuisance still!
Alright, he knew it. A true man admits to his own faults. How embarrassing it was, having a terrible lust on your enemy, your roommate, the ant of one’s soup and the hurricane of one’s life. If he knew that’d happen, he’d have closed the door on Yibo’s face the first time he arrived and said, “sorry, wrong ad, no sexy mischievous brats allowed”.
Yet, no handsomeness in the world can excuse such behavior. Xiao Zhan will stand his ground no matter what. None of it excuses how he comes home some nights, dreading the next day and tired from arduous meetings, to find a bunch of lego pieces scattered along the carpet ━ or ugly little dolls with purple hair over the coffee table.
“What the heck’s this?” he questioned, holding one of them.
“A minion figurine. You know… from that popular film.”
Xiao Zhan tilted his head, analyzing the odd toy.
Perhaps he was, after all, becoming quite old.
“Figurine? Why does it look like a demon?”
“ You look like a demon,” Yibo retorted, moving from the end of the hallway to the living room like lightning, ready to defend his poor doll. Then, he catched the figurine from Xiao Zhan’s hand in one swift sweep. “Don’t say that to my minion’s face.”
He doesn’t know how the fights started, but he just knows that it’s a big surprise that Yibo hasn’t asked to leave yet. Maybe it was the boy’s awfully big pride. Maybe it was just that he couldn’t cook for shit and knew would starve without Xiao Zhan’s generosity to let him have whatever he made. Maybe it was his inability to find a job.
Following a few other brawls, Xiao Zhan once managed to pique his bad mood at another moment without any intention. All it took was for a large painting he had created last afternoon to be on the sofa Sunday morning ━ he would never admit he did it because he felt lonely, no, he would never ━, drying, when Yibo arrived from his trip to his parents’ house.
“What’s… what’s that on the couch?”
Xiao Zhan wanted to get up and help him with the bags, but he didn’t.
He also wanted to take his eyes off the book he was reading to answer, but he didn’t.
“It’s called art for the knowledgeable kids.”
“Well, I hate it,” Yibo said, mercilessly. “Take it off.”
And you can insult a person’s character, appearance or even their personality, but never, never insult someone’s art. That only made Xiao Zhan hate him more. Good thing he didn’t help him with anything, and good thing Xuan Lu loved pancakes, because he would take the spare ones he made for Yibo and take it to her tomorrow morning.
It was a fairly realistic painting of the best natural view in Chongqing, and he dared insult it so pettily? Xiao Zhan could never forgive such a thing. He would take it to the grave.
It was a fairly realistic painting of the best natural view in Chongqing, and he dared insult it so pettily? Xiao Zhan could never forgive such a thing. He would take it to the grave.
That specific night, fifteen minutes before everything went wrong ━ or right, depending on who asked later ━ , Yibo was in the kitchen making his own dinner with sweat dripping from his forehead and yelling at the pan after Xiao Zhan told him he wouldn’t bother to help.
“Hey, where’s the sugar here?!” he screamed.
“Second cabinet from the top.”
He heard a rustle as the cabinet opened, the sound of packages falling into his terrible roommate’s face. Xiao Zhan didn’t look up from his book, but let out a sardonic chuckle.
“Why do you have so many Lays packages inside this thing?!”
His screams are always a call for trouble. High pitch and full serious face ━ that was his demeanor whenever something stressed the young man. It was a look that at the same time annoyed Xiao Zhan, it also infuriated him with desire. Either way, he’s not one to back away from a fight.
“Why do you have so many helmets?!”
It was the truth. There were at least a dozen in his room.
Xiao Zhan didn’t know what to do with Yibo, really.
“At least they’re useful!”
“And I need snacks! That’s being useful to me!”
Yibo lost his rationality in one of those dangerous motorbike rides. He just knew it.
As soon as he left the kitchen to stand in front of the couch, looking at Xiao Zhan while crossing his arms, he knew he was one step away from dropping everything and taking one of those helmets to chill his mind. But he wouldn’t go without stating how much he despised Xiao Zhan, for certain.
Meanwhile, he didn’t take his eyes off the book in his hands.
“I hate you so much,” he heard him hissing.
“Oh, that’s nice of you to say,” Xiao Zhan replied. “I hate you more.”
“I hate you a hundredfold!”
“I hate you a thousandfold!”
And it was at that exact moment that the room went black.
Cutting off everyone’s power inside the building, they were encircled by darkness.
It felt like an irony. Like the universe itself hated him. As Xiao Zhan groaned, putting his book away, Wang Yibo stood frozen for a minute before calmly squatting down and sitting on the carpet. Just as easily as it arose, the aggressive tension between them vanished.
Their first reaction was to find everything strange. Their eyes couldn’t adjust well enough to the atmosphere because other houses were also experiencing the same thing and so, any spot of light was off. Xiao Zhan tatted the furniture to find himself on the floor as well, sighing together with the younger man beside him.
The second reaction was a fleeting sense of despair. Yibo hadn’t charged his cell phone, and Xiao Zhan didn’t have a mobile internet connection. Who knew for how long the blackout would continue? It had barely been ten minutes, but they felt as if hours had gone by already. In the silence they tacitly maintained, both stood completely bored.
And for an unknown reason, Xiao Zhan mentally noted that Yibo did not make any move to stand away from him. Even if they were bored, he didn’t leave Xiao Zhan’s side. He wondered if he was scared and preferred being with someone or if felt that Xiao Zhan himself needed comfort.
It didn’t matter what was the answer, just these thoughts made his heart skip a beat.
The third reaction was compliance. There was nothing to do, so they sat with their heads thrown over the couch and eyes closed. As time passed, however, the nap that Xiao Zhan was trying to take was postponed, since Yibo seemed restless: moving here and there, turning sideways, shaking his legs, he couldn’t sit still for his life.
Time was apparently affecting his inner emotions, then it didn’t take long for Yibo to speak again. His voice was a bit hoarse, and although he couldn’t see him, Xiao Zhan could swear he was nervous.
“Shit, won’t this be over?” he cursed. “I have things to do and the light seems like it’ll never appear again. Why is this happening right now out of all the days? And how much time does it take to fix this up, are they trying to solve the problem or kill us all?”
“It’s just a blackout. We won’t die, so don’t overreact.”
“But it’s so frustrating,” Yibo murmured. “Ge, when will this end…”
That reaction made Xiao Zhan open his eyes and take his head off the couch. Even if he couldn’t see anything nonetheless, he could vaguely watch Yibo’s fidgeting silhouette much closer than it was fifteen minutes ago. His palms sweat as he cleared his throat.
“Why are you calling me ‘ge’?”
“Because you’re old.”
“I’m gonna hit you.”
Behind them, a soft rain started pouring, raindrops creating a melody.
Inside the room, Xiao Zhan tried his best not to scare Wang Yibo even harder than he looked by impulsively grabbing his hand. That was an act that enemies were not supposed to pull. That guy was still the one who brought voodoo toys into the apartment ━ oh, wait, demon dolls .
“Because you’re older ,” Yibo corrected. “Sorry.”
“Why are you saying ‘sorry’? What’s… happening to you today?”
“Because I’m scared, okay? Can’t you see? It’s fine, you can have it,” Yibo turned his head, exasperated at the idea of being mocked. Not that Xiao Zhan would do it out of cruelty anyway. “I’m scared of the dark. I’ve always been…”
Xiao Zhan stopped for a moment. Who knew that the guy who wasn’t ashamed of being on stage ━ which Xiao Zhan feared more than anything in life ━ would be afraid of actually being in the dark? It was something that could make one laugh. But he was a person who couldn’t find the fun in something that was serious for others.
He was a weak person. He would prefer to hug him, and tell him it was okay.
If he wasn’t his enemy, of course.
“I see. That makes sense, I guess.”
“What, you’re not gonna make fun of me?”
“I don’t make fun of other people’s fears,” Xiao Zhan explained, huffing. “Contrary to what you might believe, I’m not a hateful person, Wang Yibo.”
Just as he said such words, a lightning struck outside and Xiao Zhan’s expression turned sour. If he didn’t know better, he’d say it was the universe cursing him for being a liar, reminding him of every moment he spoke against Wang Yibo both out loud and in his mind. Truthfully, though, his hate wasn’t a terribly dangerous one! For example, he wasn’t capable of hating someone to the point of planning their murder.
He was harmless in that aspect. If anything, he just had the courage to throw all of those little demons Yibo called a toy collection in the trash and saying it was accidental. That’s just how his hate works, and he also didn’t think that he, himself, was someone so detestable before the younger man came around.
A minute passes between them. Wang Yibo reaches closer, and relaxes more.
“I know you’re not,” he whispered.
“No, you don’t. You hate me, how could you know?”
“I don’t… I don’t actually hate you.”
Xiao Zhan can’t believe it because there are a lot of scenes going on in his head. There are those so-called minion figurines running through his mind; days when Yibo decided to play loud video games until four in the morning, noise of dance steps, food that tasted like vinegar, helmets on the couch and towels thrown on the floor.
“Everything you’ve done until now tells me otherwise,” Xiao Zhan comments.
“But I’ve done nothing! You’re the one who picks fights with everything I do!”
“Maybe because you’re too noisy to irritate me.”
“I’m noisy because I’m naturally noisy, what can I do?!”
At least that part he could believe. Yibo was who he was, bratty and petty.
Because the boy may have a reputation for being too cold towards others, yet he hummed pop songs under his breath as he packed his clothes and imitated video game sounds as he walked around the house. Because he did spiderman stunts whenever he felt like to and danced randomly as if that was a subconscious reaction.
Xiao Zhan hesitates then, having second thoughts about his own opinions.
“You leave the towels wet and on the floor,” he still points out.
“It’s a bad habit, I know. What are you, my mom?”
As one that was often called the boring father in his group of friends, the words didn’t affect him like they should. Instead of getting upset, Xiao Zhan just pushed Yibo’s leg with his foot a little, clicking his tongue in contemplation. That’s indeed the attitude of a young, immature boy, and he just felt the need to lecture him.
“You complain about my Lays, constantly disturb my sleep, get me in trouble with neighbors,” Xiao Zhan started to point everything for him, because he’s not crazy, he knows Yibo has been difficult to deal with on purpose, “use these scary figurines of yours to intimidate me and insult my art.”
Yibo fidgeted in place, as if ashamed at having these facts out in the open. He could almost be placated with his embarrassment, if the guy wasn’t the devil incarnate.
If he wasn’t such a terrible, beautiful, incorrigible nuisance.
“Okay, I won’t deny all the other things, but when have I ever insulted your art?”
“Last month! When you told me to take it off the couch!”
Yibo entered a thoughtful moment of silence. Xiao Zhan waited, finding his casual quiet muttering a tad adorable, but repealing the thought as soon as it invaded his head. Because again, he shouldn’t find his roommate attractive. He should be finding excuses to expel him from that house instead.
Once he recalled the moment he asked to remove the picture Xiao Zhan painted from the sofa, Yibo startled. If they were in a cartoon, a light bulb would turn on over his head.
“Oh, wait, I remember it now… that painting was yours?”
“Yes, of course it was. Who else would it belong to?”
“That’s incredible, how can you do it?”
Xiao Zhan went speechless for a while.
At the end of the day, was the nuisance of his life really complimenting him for the first time? Was it really just rain that poured down or was it a meteor as well? That seemed like an uncanny circumstance. One he couldn’t even dream about.
Moreover, just that small compliment shouldn’t make his heart beat faster, his hands sweat like he was back to being fourteen and his skin prickle. It shouldn’t affect him that much. Although he’s been aware of his stupid attraction for some time, he was still irritated at how much Yibo could affect him.
Be it causing that sudden desire or leaving Xiao Zhan deeply annoyed, Yibo had a way of getting into his skin like no one else could.
“What?” Yibo questioned when he noticed the silence stretching.
“You’re contradicting yourself,” Xiao Zhan said.
“Look, I wasn’t in a good mood that day, okay?”
“Are you always in a bad mood, then? Because you’re always being hard to deal with.”
Since Yibo came into his life, the world has been anything but quiet. Before Yibo, Xiao Zhan’s routine did not include complaints from neighbors, he knew nothing about those indecent north-american rap songs and the quality of his hearing was good. Now it seemed that he had to deal with protests from Qin-laoshi every day and his eardrums were in a terrible state, not to mention his sleeping routine.
Maybe he’s aging too fast. Could that be it?
No, certainly wasn’t. It was all Yibo’s fault.
“I had my parents tell me all weekend I should stop pursuing my dreams and just get married to inherit their restaurant business instead,” Yibo confessed, apparently scratching his eyes. “It got over my head and annoyed me. I didn’t actually hate the painting, you know, you have a lot of talent. It was very good.”
Well, Xiao Zhan could understand that. With a light head movement, he tries to show some support. His family was the same way, always questioning why he always arrived alone during family dinners. Always making inquiries he didn’t want to answer. Xiao Zhan hated these moments and, for the first time since they met, felt sympathy for the young man.
“I’m… sorry to hear that,” he said, sighing at his own pathetic predicament. Making amends with his nemesis. Lacking the right words at the face of his vulnerability. What an idiot, really. “Parents are complicated. Sometimes they don’t understand us very much.”
“Yeah, that’s a nice way to put it,” Yibo cleared his throat, as if he doesn’t want to talk about that anymore. “Anyway, I’m past that. Can I call you ‘ge’ now?”
“I mean… it’s fine. I wasn’t bothered for real.”
“Can I be here at your side? It’s really dark.”
“Hmn. Okay.”
“Can I call you ‘Zhan-ge’?”
“Why that though?”
“Because we don’t hate each other, do we?” Yibo shrugged, or so he felt through the contact between their bodies. Xiao Zhan wondered how he could deal with their dynamic changing so easily. Maybe Yibo was just like that, prone to like and hate easily. “It’s all a misunderstanding.”
“I’m not sure that’s how intimacy works, you know.”
“And you do seem very cool,” he continued, his foot touching Xiao Zhan just slightly, and he thought that he wanted the light to return immediately just to check Yibo’s face, to see his round cheeks moving as he spoke. It’s always been quite sweet to watch, though he’d never admit it. “You’re certainly talented too. You draw and you paint and you design, look how cool that is. Also, you have nice abs.”
“I have… nice what?!”
Xiao Zhan, taken aback by the phrase, chokes on air.
It’s alright that he received and still receives a lot of praise about his appearance, especially when he’s in Chongqing and his mother starts to introduce him to every single girl in the neighborhood, yet to be so honestly complimented for his body, by the abdomen muscles that he worked so hard to acquire alone, was a new one.
After all, he didn’t take shirtless pictures. When he thought about it, the only occasion where Yibo could’ve seen his body… it’d be during moments he’d search for clothes around the house right after coming out of the shower. Just yesterday he was stressed and walked out of the bathroom with wet hair and a towel wrapped around his waist.
He knew, then, that Yibo was at home, but he thought he shouldn’t mind. He had no idea Yibo could be observing his every move from the couch.
Wait a minute. Does that mean that he…?
“Congratulations on your abs,” Yibo coughed. “And butt. You really have a nice one.”
“What… what are you even saying? Why are you saying this?!”
The younger man admits another posture, his back becoming straighter before turning sideways to glance at Xiao Zhan. With that powerful look shining through the darkness around, he felt his skin itch.
“Because it’s true. I don’t hate you, but do I hate it when you walk around with your gym clothes and your fine arms around the house… it’s so unfair.”
“Why…” Xiao Zhan gulped, “why do you hate it?”
It was a pity that they were in complete darkness. Xiao Zhan wanted to see him. That moment, he had a ridiculous sentiment. He wanted to see his face in the light, see it all, unfold piece by piece the great puzzle that was Wang Yibo and take every little detail for himself.
He wanted him for himself. In fact, he burned with that desire.
Xiao Zhan swallowed dry, and noticed Yibo moving his body closer. The heat he exhaled was like a thousand suns, and the smell of his body resembled adrenaline, causing his heart to beat faster. He also had a vague flagrance of honey. It was annoying enough that Xiao Zhan wanted to feel it with the tip of his tongue.
“I hate it… because I can’t touch it,” Yibo whispered.
Xiao Zhan groped Yibo’s hand until he touched his chin.
“Who said you can’t?”
Kissing in the dark was fairly strange, but they made it happen. With the brat’s smooth skin on his fingertips, Xiao Zhan catches his face enough to hear Yibo’s heartbeats, and suddenly the boy was closing the distance between them with a quick movement.
Wang Yibo kisses with energy, stealing all his breath. Then, as agile as a tiger, he ignores the room floor to sloppily sit on Xiao Zhan’s lap, surrounding his shoulders with his arms and pressing their bodies together. Taking advantage of the moment the older man parted his lips a little, Yibo’s tongue dominated the kiss with enthusiasm ━ it was a delightful surprise to discover that Wang Yibo tasted like sunflowers, adrenaline, and honey.
Xiao Zhan shifted his hips a little more comfortably, to accommodate Yibo’s body, and the boy moaned with the friction the movement caused. The sound sent shivers down his body like he just touched electricity. He liked the sound a bit too much, liked how Yibo’s fingers tightened against his nape, how he could breathe in his warmth, how his hair felt on his hands, and, softly, he prompted one more gentle movement to hear it again.
Said and done, he hears it one more time. Goddamn it.
Xiao Zhan’s hands roamed Yibo’s body, until they reached━
All at once, the light in the apartment came back.
With its return, every neighbor jumps into a commotion, some arguing over the disappearance in the first place, others commemorating, and a couple yelling like crazy without letting everyone pinpoint if it was out of enthusiasm or anger, just a middle ground. It was those yells, however, that let Xiao Zhan come out of his stupor, holding Yibo’s wrist as he broke the kiss.
He looked at the man in his lap, breathless.
“The light’s on again… does that mean we should come back to hating each other?”
Yibo smirked, such a devilish and gorgeous smirk that Xiao Zhan’s heart skipped a beat.
“I think that means we should come back to kissing each other, Zhan-ge.”
Xiao Zhan let out a huff, and his mouth once again chased after Yibo’s.
They made out a little more until they got tired of the floor, but the noise of the rain getting thicker caught their attention, so Xiao Zhan lifted Yibo by the thighs as the boy tied firmly to the designer, taking him to the room while staggering a little ━ their lips didn’t leave one another’s for a single moment.
The thing was, maybe he didn’t hate Yibo so much after all.
There were other things he discovered he could hate more. For example, the distance between their faces as they stopped for breath even if for a single moment, the fact he still had his shirt on, how his trousers were difficult to unzip, how they only had uncomfortable single beds instead of a queen-sized one (he’d make sure to change that, in the future). There were things he loathed ardently, but Wang Yibo wasn’t one of them.
Truthfully, as he kissed the younger boy, the most inconvenient and most sincere roommate in the world, Xiao Zhan thought that he loved this feeling more than he could hate anything at all.
And with Yibo beside him, well… perhaps he could like the rain.