Chapter Text
"Ugh, gnomes. Because our lives weren't already a fever dream," Dipper muttered, clinging to the "murder pizza" as they fled Stan's chicken suit catastrophe.
Mabel stumbled beside him. "Right? Who needs sanity? Or homework?"
Stan's voice echoed through the forest, "Chickens, Dipper! The future is fowl, and I'm the egg-spert!"
Rocket dropped from the trees, pizza slices flying everywhere. "Oh joy, the dynamic duo and their idiot uncle. Just what I needed to spice up my Tuesday."
Dipper groaned. "Rocket, must you?"
Rocket snatched a slice, grinning. "Hey, someone's gotta keep things raccoon-tastic around here."
Gnomes on unicorns burst forth, wielding:
Tiny pitchforks
Glittery signs reading "Gnomes 4Ever"
What appeared to be a miniature disco ball
Mabel charged forward, pizza held high. "Take this, gnome-pocalypse!"
Dipper yelped as a gnome speared his backpack. "Mabel, help!"
Stan, flapping his chicken suit wings, shouted, "Cluck, cluck, CHAOS! Don't worry! I'm offering Gnome-Repellent Glitter for just $9.99! And also, has anyone seen my chicken nugget-filled pension plan?"
Dipper screamed: "You already told us that Grunkle Stan! And Soos is the one to ask!"
Rocket face-palmed. "This is why we can't have nice things."
He launched a pizza slice at the gnomes, hitting one squarely on the pointy hat.
"Nice shot!" Mabel cheered.
Rocket smirked. "Child's play. Now watch this."
He pulled out a whoopee cushion and sat on it, triggering a ridiculously loud fart sound that sent the gnomes scattering.
Dipper and Mabel stared. "Rocket..."
"What?" Rocket shrugged. "Hey, it's a classic."