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Despite how tired he truly was, how much his body ached down to the bone, how much he wished to stay beneath the bed linens to shield against the coolness of the stone room of the Waking Sands, Thancred could not sleep. There was a ringing in his ears, and the voice in the back of his head worked in tandem with that tiny sound making his head spin and he just wanted it to stop. He hissed and squeezed his abdomen in pain from the hunger that he had ignored the entire day – though he did not know what day it was, or if the sun still hung in the sky or the moon began her glide across the stars. He felt both blessed and cursed by the room in which he was placed in for rehabilitation.
The consensus seemed to be that the Ascian’s claws truly were gone from his body and mind, but he remained in the room fearful of the scars that ran deep into him, as if sketched beneath the skin bodywide. At first it was fear of hurting his friends again and being unable to stop it, the images of betrayal in their eyes in their final moments still plagued him. Minfilia told him to think nothing of it, that nothing that happened is truly his fault, none of the (living) members of the Seventh Dawn blame him. And yet, the fear of it happening again paralyzed him, the fact that no one had ever survived a possession like his tore at him, and the idea that he doubted Minfilia’s kind words made him question his entire being. He knew his failure led to the death of so many of their comrades within the Seventh Dawn and no gentle phrase would make the flashbacks simply stop.
Though Minfilia and few others visited this cold room secluded behind scheduled guards, he knew why the numbers of visits were so low. He was still something to be feared. His failure still hung in their minds, the unknown of his condition made them more afraid than he was. Everything happening to him was undocumented and unparalleled historically, according to all the scholarly academics of the Scions including Urianger, one of the few visitors among Minfilia, Papalymo, and Y’shtola. Thancred was an absolute anomaly, but fascinating all the same. By all evidence, he was told, Thancred should be dead, his aether dissipated along with Lahabrea’s essence with the ashes of the destroyed Praetorium.
It was just too much to bear. He wished to be scattered to the winds. It could not be helped, he imagined his companions saying as they looked at the ruins of the Praetorium.
The pang in his gut struck again and he tossed the blanket off with annoyance, coolness washing over him and clinging to the sweat on his shoulders and aching back. He shivered with regret, now fully awake staring at the ceiling. All but one lantern’s flame nearest the door outside had been snuffed out to give him some peace. After everything, absolute darkness was too much for him still.
He stretched his shoulders, feeling the strain in his muscles continue to ache. Muscles still rebelled with his movement, every act deliberate and weak. He slicked his sweaty bangs from his eyes and wondered why he of all people was spared like this. It would not be the first time that he had escaped death, by no means the last, he was sure, but this was likely the closest he had gotten. With a grimace twisting his face, he wondered how he would be judged by the scales as the door opened slow and silent, the light from the hallway catching his eye in an instant.
Thancred froze in place. His empty stomach plummeted at the sight of the hooded figure that stepped into the darkness of the room and closed the door. His eyes were normally reliable in darkness like this, but with his vision blurred… No, it surely couldn’t be Lahabrea, could it?
The sound of the latch covered the sound of Thancred’s swift nimble steps to tackle the tall figure to the ground, the hilt of the knife that was hidden beneath his pillow a single second before clenched within his fingers. His breathing was too quick in his state, however, and his head swam, a pulsing headache making him squeeze his eyes shut, hissing at the pain. His free hand unclenched the cloth of the robe and his grip of the knife loosened.
The straddled figure spoke beneath the weight of Thancred, a whisper gentle and soft, “My friend, all is well. No harm will come to thee, certainly none from me.”
Thancred’s eyes snapped open and squinted to see with the limited light of the flame the tall figure beneath him, robed and mask adorned, but hands held up in peace. He rubbed his eyes. “Urianger?” His voice rasped and his throat ached.
Urianger kept his hands above his head. “Mine apologies for failing to knock before entering. I was unable to ascertain if thou still slumbered.”
Thancred dropped his knife to the floor in a metallic clang that echoed against the stone sharply, and fell off Urianger. He held his chest, gripping his shirt between his fingers as he tried to find his breath. The cold stone floors were cool to his skin and would almost bring relief if it weren’t for him nearly stabbing a blade through his dear friend’s heart a moment prior. He sucked in the air, trying to regain a semblance of himself once more.
“How… do I know it is truly you?” He could only move his head to his left to look at Urianger who remained on the floor by his side, hands still up, though less tense.
“Though one could regale thee with elaborate stories, withdrawn secrets, or the password Minfilia finds small comfort in, experience hath shown us that Ascians manage to delve into memories of those they possess. Despite knowing this, I only ask for trust. The password, to my recollection, is ‘a Duskbloom beneath the stars,’ for whatever comfort that will bring to thee.” He rose off the floor, not making any quick movements to alarm Thancred further and stood tall above him. He gave his robes a couple quick slaps to remove the dust and reached a hand to Thancred.
Thancred stared at the hand above him, his breathing returning to somewhat normal. He sighed, figuring Lahabrea would have killed or repossessed him by now if Urianger truly had his body snatched by the Ascian or another of his ilk. He looked away in shame, not daring to even look Urianger in the eye through the darkness. Urianger stood in silhouette in front of the flame, casting the shadow on Thancred, the outreaching hand hanging in his peripheral vision.
“What brings you here, then?” Thancred did not rise from the floor, twisting his legs to kneel on a knee and rest his wrist on it.
Urianger paused. “To observe thine condition. I hast many a potion that may benefit thine afflictions, along with–.” He leaned over to reach a hand to Thancred’s face.
Thancred slapped the elezen’s hand away. “I do not need to be coddled like a child. I’m fine.”
The hand withdrew without so much as a gasp. Thancred swore and gripped onto his upright leg in a hunched embrace, shrinking smaller, feeling Urianger’s gaze on his neck like he could feel the man’s breath. He wanted to melt into the floor, he wanted to drown.
“Words with such thorns may do well to keep the others at bay but ‘twill do no good to anyone for you to withdraw indefinitely. Such words will surely not keep one such as I away.”
Thancred sat hugging his knee for some time, holding back the bite in his words that wanted to escape.
“Urianger… I do not deserve it. The looks of pity, to be cared for like a bomb that could just… explode at any second. I am nothing but a broken man who has failed those I love. Ghosts haunt my dreams and I dare not walk in the sun with their cries in my head.”
Urianger’s hand reached out once more without hesitation nor fear.
“If this is what thou wishes, walk with me while the moon yet shines beautifully amongst the stars. It is too wondrous of a night to go unnoticed. Let us leave this place, just for a while without the eyes of travelers and merchants seeing us. Vesper Bay sleeps, but we do not.” Thancred looked up to the silhouette of Urianger and loosened his vice grip on his legs. “Come. I require saffron to brew a sleeping potion that would surely benefit thee and ease thine dreams. The flowers bloometh mere fulms from the southern gates of Horizon and thine company would serve me well. Wouldst thou be amenable to a simple supper as well?
So it was night after all, Thancred thought with the image of the moon calming his soul with her showering light and his lungs yearned for open air. Urianger’s palm remained open and gentle before him and he strained his arm upward to take it.
Salty desert air filled his lungs as they stepped out of the Waking Sands. Urianger’s words held true. Vesper Bay was indeed empty. Only the sound of the Rhotano Sea’s waves lapping on the docks could be heard mixed with the sound of desert insects buzzing in the air. Thancred figured Horizon may still hold some activity but that small town was always quiet despite it having an aetheryte to bring in travelers.
And, as promised, the moon hung high in the sky, larger than usual, full and blooming with light. Without being asked, Urianger mentioned that tonight was a special celestial phenomenon that came only once in a while, observed when the moon came closer in its orbit around our star. Its brightness magnified and reflecting off the sun, it illuminated their path as they cleared out of the lantern lined tunnel leading out of Vesper Bay. Though lampposts stood on the path, their glow was muted in its beauty. Thancred couldn’t stop looking up at it as it followed them on the short journey. Urianger urged him onward, noting that he needed Thancred’s assistance if the fauna of the area decided their territory lies in the path. For a blessing, the buzzards and orobon left them be, the worst only coming from the swarms of midges near the lamps that they had to swat away with dismissive gestures. The researchers working by lamplight paid them no mind, their bodyguards not even glancing in their direction as they passed by.
As they walked along the path of the dripping wet ruins, Thancred chewed on the flakes of dried fish Urianger procured from the fishers at Crescent Cove. The salt and meat were delightful on his tongue. Urianger handed him a bottle from his bag mentioning that it would benefit his strength and work well with the nutrients from the fish. He pulled the contents from the bottle in one swig as if it were strong alcohol, prepared for the bitter aftertaste of most potions and found none, it was actually pleasant. He looked to his companion, feeling the surprise leak through his eyes.
Did he specially prepare this? Thancred thought as he chewed on more flakes of fish from the pouch in his hands.
Urianger just smiled at the corners of his mouth and continued to walk by Thancred’s side, beginning the ascent through the tunnel to Horizon. The lift was not operational this late into the night and so they needed to climb the steep incline by foot. Thancred pocketed the empty bag of fish flakes and they both used the pillars on the walls to support their climb.
Wind struck them both as they entered Horizon at the top of the tunnel, feeling cool and fresh. Thancred inhaled deeply. The climb was hard but they were nearly at the southern gate of Horizon. He stretched and felt his joints pop and strain with some resistance but it felt so refreshing to breathe air not stale with dust and his own misery. Horizon was quiet as ever, the lamplight glow showing how few people were outside this late night.
Once outside the gate, Thancred gazed at Ul’dah’s beautiful expansive skyline in view on the horizon glowing and glittering like amber jewels. Urianger looked around, his lips in a thin line, then with a dramatic flourish, covered his mouth with his hand.
“I beg forgiveness from thee. I seem to have erred deeply.” He did not show his face, his mask covering all expression.
“What do you mean?”
“Saffron blooms in the desert, aye, but not in the western portion of Thanalan. It grows south of Ul’dah.” Urianger still did not lower his hand and Thancred couldn’t tell if Urianger was messing with him or not.
“Is that so?”
At this, Urianger lowered his hand, revealing the same small smile on his lips.
“Aye. I am afraid ‘tis so. Here you will find naught but moko grass and glass vipers that slither between. Ah, but if you find such a viper, please catch it, for they make fine antidotes for poisons.”
So that was how it was. Thancred nodded with a smirk and spotted a boulder nearby a bush of moko grass and sat down on it facing the skyline, patting it for Urianger to join him.
“A moment’s rest before we return?” He sat back on his hands behind his back, using the moment to stretch more.
Urianger shifted his robes beneath him and sat down ilms beside him with his hands in his lap without a word. He seemed to fixate on a particular building standing tall in Ul’dah. The mask always made it hard to tell which way he was actually looking.
Thancred sat up and put a hand to his forehead. Thancred exhaled a sigh that could not contain his chuckle. “Saffron.” He dropped his hand and watched his friend’s soft expression, smirking as he saw the smile upon it widened by an ilm. Urianger placed his hand on Thancred’s and grasped it.
“‘Twas my only wish to see you out of those chambers if even for a moment. Now, tell me true, my friend, how do your ailments fare?”
It’s almost like I wanted to be tricked so easily.
Thancred flipped his palm upward and squeezed Urianger’s hand back between his fingers, bashfully looking away from the man. “I’ll admit. It’s good to be outside again. How long has my self imposed imprisonment lasted?”
Urianger’s smile dropped. “Two sennights, or thereabouts. Worry not; Master Y’shtola and the Warrior have attended to thine duties. Lady Minfilia insisted on allowing thee as much time as necessary.”
Thancred sighed and Urianger held strong onto his hand. It was warm and soft, unrelenting.
“Know that none of the events that befell are your fault nor a failure of your ability. Thou art hale and whole, that thou wert able to accompany me on this small journey, and will likely make many in the future, much longer and more fulfilling. Many care for thee, myself amongst them.” Urianger coughed and cleared his throat.
“I am sorry for the harsh words that came from me earlier.” He squeezed Urianger’s hand gently and Urianger wound his fingers between Thancred’s.
“Think naught of it.” Urianger shook his head. “Much harsher barbs hath spilled from thine lips in the mornings after thou indulged in far too much drink. Such things hath no power over me, for I know thine heart true.”
Thancred’s eyes widened in shock and he shoved Urianger lightly with his free palm, the tall man swaying with the force like a young sapling with a small chuckle. Thancred exhaled through his nose and couldn’t keep the laughter in any longer.
“‘Tis good to see thine smile again, my friend.” Urianger nodded, his thumb rubbing on Thancred’s hand. “I apologize that I employed such deception to witness it once more.”
Thancred sighed with a smirk and lifted his head upward to gaze at the moon hanging above Thanalan. “Thank you, Urianger. You are the only one who likely could have pulled me out of there. You’re a dear friend.”
He released his hand from Urianger and stretched. It may have been the potion flowing through his blood, but he felt at ease, his muscles feeling less sore, but additionally his mind did not plague him as harshly as before. Thancred shifted his body weight upward to get on his feet and reached his palm out to help Urianger. Urianger took it with nothing more than a smile.
As Urianger rose, Thancred threw his arms around his friend, squeezing his palms onto the elezen’s large back and held his forehead against the soft cotton robes as tears soaked the fabric. Arms wrapped around him and Urianger held him tightly beneath the stars until Thancred’s hands fell.