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Published:
2024-09-03
Updated:
2024-09-08
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2,433
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3/?
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11
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133
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I'M WHAT?

Chapter 3

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Dev woke at roughly eight o'clock on a sunny Saturday morning of Dimmadephia. The soft mattress made him sink down into his satin silky pillows. Dev buried his face deeper into the bed, remembering the extremely weird dream he had of.. 

 

He'd rather not dwell on it. The disheveled ginger curls on his face sprang out like coils, a problem for later Dev, not drowsy - barely awake Dev Dimmadome. But no matter how hard he tried, the sun crept through the cracks of the curtains, engulfing the room with the bright sunny morning.

 

Stretching as if he was a cat, small tears prickling his eyes from his hard he yawned for sleep. He rubbed his heterochromic blue and green eyes, what a strange morning.

 

Clapping his hands as a signal for his fairies, they poofed into existence with Peri fixing the collar of the leather jacket that Irep was wearing. Peri himself wasn't wearing his usual attire of a purple car sales man instead it was a large jumper with big chunky bold letters spelling out 'L.O.S.E.R.S', and according to Dev it was so cool but that didn't matter because that wasn't what his observant eyes focused on.

 

"Why are you fat?" Blurted out Dev, not since, not how, but why? Ouch. The billion dollar question to all - maybe that would impress his dad.. - Dev only felt a little ashamed,  though it was mostly just unexplained sleepy curiosity with no real malice intent, it kinda reminded him of his weird dream.. "you weren't yesterday."

 

Irep practically exploded into laughter, cackles into belly laughter that ultimately turned into bashing his fist to any solid surface it collided with. He shook, with giggles that racked his body, howling could be heard through the streets like a madman. Irep was actually crying! The acid tipped the corners of his eyes.

 

"You finished?" Stared an unimpressed Peri who witnessed the entire reaction that managed to get Dev to chuckle albeit only a little. With Irep's dying laughter and a curt nod, he continued. " I'm.. um..", right, humans didn't have pregnant men, he sighed and bit the bullet. " .. pregnant."

 

There was a pause before the words recorded in Dev's mind. He put on his chunky, square sunglasses and exhaled a long, deep breath.

 

"DIMMA-XSUCE ME?" Dev screeched. " How? What? why?" There was a bombardment of questions just continuing to spill out. He glared daggers into Irep. Irep just whistled innocently.

"What? Don't you go saying that I caused this!" Irep threw his hands in the air, exasperated that Dev wasn't giving up on looking up at him through his sunglasses. Dev was sat upright, back resting on the pillows as he pointed accusations. "This time I didn't. Well..NOT that bad... " Irep shrugged nonchalantly. Peri coughed unconvincingly, the blush on his face spreading in a pinkish tint all over his cheeks to his ears.

 

"Yea yea, don't wanna know what my fairy god-parents get up to cause whatever!" Dev shook his head in disappointment, unknown to the fairies to who was getting scolded by their ten-year old god-child. "You can still grant wishes, right?... Right?"

 

Peri sighed whilst Irep smiled maliciously curling the corners of his mouth like the Grinch and his eyes twinkling with mischief while Peri was ready to (most likely) throw up and sleep.

 

"I can Dev, but I will be a lot more sleepy than usual.." pause, " so Irep here will be taking over a little." He shot the anti-fairy a pointed glare. "I don't want to fix everything just because little mister Harbinger of doom here can't follow some rules."

 

"Oh cotton puff, you do truly wound me!" Moaned Irep as if he was a damsel in distress, fainting on top of Peri (although being careful not to rest his full on him), placing his hand on his head. "And how dare thee assume that I would follow such stupid rules!"

 

"How dare-"

 

"Wait! I wish for popcorn." Interrupted Dev, a large bucket of popcorn poofing it into his hands.

 

"Dev, don't eat much before your breakfast. It's not good for you." Consulted Peri, sorry all over his face. He flicked Irep off with maybe a little too much force.

 

"Okay mom."

 

And maybe Dev didn't notice how Peri's heart filled with warmth, happy to at least have a part in the kid's - rather sad - life. But that wasn't the main focus, oh no.

 

Irep was checking his nails, uninterested in the whole ordeal. Not that he would let it show of course.

 

"Where was I?" Peri straightened Irep's jumper. " No, how dare you  assume the kid is anything but yours! Plus, this kid could've wished into existence like I was! Ever think of that, Idiot Irep?" Dev bad tendencies of giving people bad nicknames must be rubbed off on Peri, blowing up like a storm on Irep. Dev smirked smugly.

 

Irep wasn't all that mad, in fact, his heart was going a mile a minute, ticking like a time bomb. His tail swished from side to side. It was always so fun to see Peri all riled up, never failing to be entertaining.

 

"And-, hold on for a moment," as if in sync, black magic swirled a bucket into existence allowing Peri to, like he had all morning all ready, to vomit rainbow gunk. Dev raised his eyebrows and Irep just whistled, waiting for Peri to stop. At times even patting him on the back, seriously where does this come from?

 

"Huh."

 

"My thoughts, Dev, my thoughts exactly."

 

Coughing from the internal deep clean, peri wiped his mouth. He looked at the pair in front of him, Dev put the popcorn down almost concerned for his fairy God-parent. It was only what? Eight o'clock in the morning all without eating breakfast? Irep furrowed his eyebrows but otherwise kept his face expressionless.

 

Peri gave a small thumbs up - heavens, he would congratulate his father for surviving this for a whole three months - holding his stomach for dear life.

 

"Irep will get you something ready, and Irep- don't burn down the kitchen like last time, Kay?"

 

The mischievous duo nodded, unknowingly already creating chaos with every step that Peri wasn't supervising. Fingers crossed it wouldn't be a repeat of last time, though he had seen Irep strict when he wanted to be. Which was only thirty percent of the time. He prayed he wouldn't have to explain why half the kitchen was turned into a crisp to Dev's dad again, nearly costing him his imaginary job.

 

The door closed with a click, leaving the pregnant fairy all to himself. He remembered what he'd said to Irep earlier in their little quarrel. What if.. no that's impossible. He didn't remember granting any wishes in that direction and his ahem! night with Irep.. well let's just say it could be the cause... Back on track, maybe it was the same situation as him and Timmy, granting his parents a baby. 

 

Poofing 'da rules' into his hands, he scanned the pages for any sign of the rule. 

 

What if Dev accidentally, in his sleep, Dev wished for a baby? A family? 

 

Peri was beyond confused.

Notes:

Yaya, writer's block is super hard and school! Yay how fun, confetti confetti and fireworks!

I read all you comments for the last few chapters and I must say here's Dev! Please tell me I got his characteristics right cause I always get a little worried if I don't write correctly. I have a tendency just to focus on one character that and then forget about the rest. Woops!

Kudos and comments are always appreciated!

Notes:

I DON'T WANNA GO BACK, I DON'T WANNA GO BACK! ILL CHEW ON THOSE BARS YOU CALL WINDOWS AND ESCAPE THROUGH THOSE BARBED WIRE TRENCHES CALLED GATES OF SCHOOL. GO AWAY AHHHHH!!!

kudos and comments are always appreciated, tell tell me if you want more!