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If there's been a fool around it's got to be me

Summary:

the summer of 1996 was going to become a boiling point for many, even for those unaware that their past choices had serious consequences.

Notes:

got the brain worms bad and needed to fix some stuff in this show lol its all very self indulgent and I usually never use OC's in my fic's so I hope it doesn't put anyone off.

additionally I feel the need to add that while I love Steven Hyde Danny Masterson deserves to rot in prison so character =/= actor

I hope you enjoy <3

Chapter Text

1979 was a long year.

It was filled with many ups and downs, heartbreaks and new loves. Old friends growing up and moving on with their lives in exciting new ways.

Jackie, in particular, felt the burn of growing pains quite aggressively that year. She moved out, and stayed single for the longest time of her young life (nevermind the momentary insanity with Fez), focused on her career, and was quite happy. Lonely, sure, but happy. Michael was doing well in Chicago, and Eric was in a whole other country. Donna was trying to pick up the pieces of her life as well, so Jackie had a lot of free time (hence the momentary insanity with Fez). Even Steven seemed to be moving forward with his life in a way he never expected. Despite the pain from the break up, she was really happy for him.

Maybe a little too happy for him, in hindsight.

She blamed loneliness, to be honest. It was the longest she had ever been single–and while that led her to being deeply productive, career-wise, she felt a sharp sting when she saw Donna dating that man with the hair, or hearing about Michael’s sexcapades in Chicago, or worse, all the people Fez brought back to the apartment. She wanted to have fun and be in love again. She wanted to be loved.

Maybe that's why, however bad of an idea it was, she did what she did. 

The mall in Point Place wasn’t the most impressive one she's ever seen, if Leia was being honest.

She didn’t want to be a snob about it, but when you come from a big city, you have your pick of the major realtors and malls. Point Place mall had a few decent stores, but it was fairly small. Honestly, it didn't bother Leia that much. She wasn’t that big on shopping unless it was for cute stationary. Besides, she was really only here to hang out with Gwen. Gwen, who was telling her how she should seriously consider working at Hot Topic since they had a few recent openings. 

Leia was unsure–she knew in her heart that she didn’t match the vibe of the store at all, but she did like the idea of spending more time with her best friend. So she told Gwen she would think about it after she figured out how to deal with the whole Almost Kissing Nate Thing.

“Here,” Gwen grinned, rushing behind the counter. She dug through a small box before reaching over to grab Leia’s dress, before pinning a name tag to her chest.

“Le…Leianna?” Leia raised a brow, reading the name upside down.

“That's the girl who quit,” Gwen explained. “See, it’s fate! You already have a name tag. Just scratch off the extra letters.”

Leia laughed, shaking her head.

“Very funny–when are you off? I’m starved.”

“I got another twenty minutes but I should be able to sneak out in ten.” Gwen winked. Her smile faded when a group of middle schoolers rushed in, knocking over a stand of clothes and spiked collars. Gwen groaned, stomping over to the kids as she snapped at them to help pick up the mess. Leia sighed–it might be longer than ten minutes. That was probably for the best, she thought as she leaned against the counter. After all, she needed every excuse she could get to avoid the boys right now.

Leia snapped out of her thoughts when she felt someone tap her shoulder. She nearly lost her breath when she came face to face with a very handsome young man–he was all dark curls and green eyes. Leia caught herself from saying “holy crap” in time.

“Do you have this in a larger size?” the handsome man asked. Leia stared at him. She suddenly realized her mouth was hanging open and snapped it shut.

“...Huh? I mean–I’m sorry?” Tall, dark and green eyes blinked slowly, holding up a dark sweater.

“The sweater,” he explained, shaking it slightly. “There's only small’s. Do you have any other sizes?”

“...Oh! Oh I don’t work here.” Leia said, a little breathless as she laughed awkwardly. The boy raised a brow.

“You sure about that uh…Leianna?” Leia paused before gasping.

“Oh! Oh this–This isn’t—You know what, I’m sorry, no, we don’t have any more of those sweaters. Sorry.” Leia settled on lying, brain frazzled by how poorly this conversation was going.

“...Right. Bummer.” He said, shrugging. He started to walk away and Leia, for whatever reason, wanted a chance to redeem herself.

“You know it's summer?” she said, maybe a little too loudly. When he gave her a confused look, she elaborated.

“I just mean…kind of a weird time to be buying sweaters, you know?”

“Oh, right,” He chuckled, laying it on the counter. “I like to try and buy them during the summer because they're cheaper than in the winter.”

“...Oh that's really smart.”

“Yeah, I know,” he said easily. He had such a….an air of mystery and coolness to him. He reminded her of the cool guys in her school who only sometimes show up to class and give one-worded responses to everything. The kind of guy you only dared talk to if you were as confident and cool as them. The kind who lean against lockers, wear leather jackets and keep cigarettes tucked behind their ear.

Leia never dared talk to those guys in fear of putting her foot in her mouth. She also hated prolonged silence, which meant she would end up talking too much out of nervousness.

“You know, um…” She swallowed hard. “If you want sweaters, thrift shops usually have tons of winter clothes for cheap?”

To Leia’s surprise, he laughed. Well, sort of–it was a light chuckle. Still, she took it as a win.

“My mom would have an absolute conniption if I came home with something second hand. She’s a bit of a snob when it comes to clothes.” He explained. The boy looked her over before nodding his head at Leia.

“Thanks, though…You know, I don’t think I’ve seen you around.” He pointed out, leaning against the counter. “It's a small town, not a lot of strangers around here.”

“Oh, I’m here for the summer…” Leia explained, almost thrilled that he kept talking with her. “I’m staying with my grandparents..!”

“Oh, cool.” He said with a nod.

Cool, she thought. Cool. Leia felt cool talking to this guy.

Leia stumbled forward when Gwen rushed up behind her, throwing her arm around her shoulder.

“Done..! Told you we’d be out in ten.” she said, breathless from her rushing around. Gwen paused and, leaning against Leia, put her hand on her hip.

“David,” She said. “What a rarity it is for you to wander into my store. Are you finally gaining a sense of style?”

“Not on your life, Gwendolyn.” he snorted.

“Don’t call me that.”

“I was just leaving,” David said, tossing the sweater at Gwen, who promptly threw it behind her. “It was nice talking with you, Leianna. Oh, Gwen, can you do me a favor and give your brother a message?”

“What's that?” she asked.

David flipped her the bird. Gwen gave a sagely nod.

“I’ll happily relay it.”

“I can always count on you. Later.” David gave a loose wave and left the store. Leia looked up at Gwen.

“You know that guy?” She asked, eyes wide. “He’s so cool. I never talk to guys like that, it was so exciting..!” Gwen laughed, shaking her head as she looped arms with Leia, walking out of the store with her.

“What, David? He’s not that cool. I mean, he has an actual drivers license so I guess he’s cooler than Jay and Nate in that regard,” she considered. Gwen looked at Leia, brows furrowed.

“Wait–haven't you met David before?” Leia shook her head.

“No way, you must have!” Gwen pushed back.

“Gwen, I think I would remember if I met a guy like that! Guys like that don’t talk to me! He's like a–a James Dean, a rebel without a cause!”

“...Okay, one, you really have to stop watching movies with your grandma,” Gwen sighed. “Secondly, I don’t know how you’ve missed him! He’s Jay’s brother–He literally lives with your boyfriend!”

Leia stopped in her tracks, eyes wide.

“Wait…. That was Jay’s brother!?” She gasped, clenching her chest, before gasping a second time. “Jay has a brother?!”

“Wait–Have you not met him yet? How is that even possible?” Gwen asked, baffled.

“I–I don’t know!” Leia exclaimed. “Jay never mentioned having a brother..!”

“That's incredible.” Gwen said, shaking her head. “I literally can't go two days without running into him, the fact that you’ve managed to miss him this long is impressive.”

“I’m so embarrassed…” Leia groaned, covering her face.

This was just another mess she did not need. If he was Jay’s brother, she would have wanted to make a good impression on him–now he’s going to think she’s a weirdo who likes to pretend to work at clothing stores.  

“Oh relax,” Gwen waves a hand, leading Leia to the food court. “Despite what Jay may tell you, David is not that special. He’s kind of aloof and chill–total opposite of Jay to be honest. He probably won’t be that interested in you when you meet.”

Leia didn’t want him to be totally disinterested in her. She wanted to be friends! Well, she thought, one problem at a time. She may not have to worry about how David feels about her if she doesn’t fix this Almost Kissed Nate problem. 

While he was proud of Jay for managing to maintain a serious relationship with a girl for a long period of time, David was positively sick of hearing about her.

It was cute at first–his brother always had this adorable, puppy-like quality to him. A horny puppy, yes, but a puppy nonetheless. So to see him utterly infatuated with a girl like this was nice, especially since he was taking it so seriously. However, David wasn’t sure he could stand to listen to him talk about how ‘smart Leia is’ and how ‘oh, Leia did the cutest thing today’ and  ‘Leia looks so adorable when she laughs’ and ‘David I’m writing a song, what rhymes with Leia?’

Nothing. Nothing rhymes with Leia.

The only thing worse than Jay ranting about how much he liked this Leia girl was Jay ranting about how upset he was with her.

“--Kissing!! Like–right on the mouth David!! My girlfriend and best friend–”

David rubbed his face, getting up from the couch to try and escape his brother. Unfortunately, Jay followed him to the kitchen, carrying on.

“I mean who DOES that?! And they kept it from me and Nikki this WHOLE TIME–”

Jay,” David cut him off after hiding his head in the freezer did nothing to tune him out.

“How much longer are you going to keep talking about this?” Jay gasped in offense.

“I have been thoroughly betrayed and you want me to stop talking?”

“Honestly, yeah.” David sighs, grabbing a soda. Between his mother and Jay, the two could fill several novels with the things they had to say. “You keep going in circles. So unless you’re going to fix this situation that you caused, I don’t want to hear it.”

Jay gasped again.

I caused!? Have you not been listening!?”

“Unfortunately, I have.” David said, sitting at the kitchen table. “And I heard the broadcast. And from the looks of it, you broke up with her and they didn’t even kiss. Even if they did, it doesn't matter because–may I remind you–you broke up with her.”

Jay gasped again, clutching his chest.

“That is so not the point David!” David rolled his eyes.

“Either way, do something about it because I’m sick of hearing it. Break up with her or kick Nate's ass for all I care.”

David paused.

“If you kick Nate’s ass, let me know because I want to watch.” Jay huffed, crossing his arms with a heavy pout. He always looked like a little kid when he did that.

“I don’t want to break up with her. I still like her.” Jay muttered. “And I couldn’t kick Nate’s ass–I tried but all I did was hug him. He’s my buddy. I can’t stay mad at my buddy.” David made a face.

“All those jiu jitsu classes only for you to not even kick his ass? Lame.”

“You know I was kind of hoping you’d be more helpful!”

“What do you want me to say?” He’d groan. “You don’t want to kick his ass, you don’t want to break up with her— all that's left is, you know, talking to her but god forbid you do that.”

“No, I am way past talking.” Jay huffed. David didn’t bother telling him that he hasn’t even tried, but whatever. Jay wasn’t likely to listen to him in this state. Before he had the lovely opportunity to pretend to listen to whatever nonsense Jay was about to force upon him, his parents came in through the back door, arguing about groceries.

“I keep telling you Michael, we do not need this much candy and chips!” His mother snapped, arms crossed as she watched Michael carry several bags into the kitchen, only to haphazardly drop them on the counter.

“But it was a sale!!” He exclaimed, waving his arms around, ignoring the bag of groceries falling off the counter.

Jackie groaned.

“When you get a stomach ache again, don’t come crying to me! In fact, sleep in the basement if it starts hurting! Now go get the rest of the bags.” Michael groaned, darting past her with more energy than you’d think a man his age would have. Jackie fixed her hair before beaming at David and Jay.

“Hey boys, how’s your day been?” She asked, kissing Jay’s cheek, who happily leaned into it while David angled his head away from her hand, foiling her attempt to ruffle his hair.

“It could be better,” Jay attempted, shoulders slumped.

“Aw, still having girl problems baby?” Jackie pouted, fixing Jay’s messy hair.

As Jay answered, David glanced behind him, hearing Michael stumbling in with the rest of the bags. With a sigh, he got up to help him. Picking up the bags, he looked in and saw at least four of them were filled with aforementioned candy and chips.

“Seriously, Michael?” David raised a brow.

“Wha–They were on SALE!” Michael sputtered, shaking his head at David, as if he were the irrational one. Michael grabbed a bag of chips with a grin as well as a beer, happily plopping down at the table to eat. The several dogs that occupied the house had since run to his side, pawing at him for scraps. David took that as a sign to start unloading the groceries himself.

“But don’t worry mom,” David overheard his brother speak. “It’s gonna be okay because I got a plan.”

“Oh good, he has a plan.” David muttered.

“Just don’t do anything stupid,” Jackie told him. “And don’t jump off the water tower again! I can not believe you did that–you really could have gotten hurt.”

“I can’t believe it took him this long to do it!” Michael laughed. “I was fallin’ off that thing in junior. high!”

That much was obvious, David thought to himself. He overheard Jay excuse himself as David struggled to fit the ridiculous amount of chips they now had in the kitchen pantry. His mother came to help, needing to move several boxes of food out of the way to fit the junk food Michael bought. She took this chance to speak with him.

“How’s your day been, sweetie?”

“You already asked that,” David points out.

“I know, but you didn’t answer. Oops–” Several bags of chips fell off the shelf. They both sighed, bending down to pick them up.

“My day’s fine,” David told her, moving to grab a large bowl, deciding it may be helpful to have a bowl of chips out to eliminate the amount they had left. “I went to the mall.”

Jackie gasped, thrilled. His mother always got excited about shopping. David and Jay spent many childhood afternoons following her around clothing stores.

“Oh! Did you buy anything handsome?” David shook his head, emptying the bag of chips into the bowl.

“No–I was looking for sweaters to get ready for the winter but nothing stood out.”

“You should keep looking,” Jackie said, still working on rearranging the pantry. “Maybe I can take you–”

“No, thank you.” David said quickly, putting the bowl on the table. Michael had acquired his Nintendo Game Boy, grabbing a handful of chips without looking as he played his game. The chips that fell out of his hand and onto the floor were quickly snatched up by the dogs.


“You don’t want to spend time with your mother?” Jackie put her hands on her hips as David walked back to her.

“I don’t want to spend my entire day shopping,” he corrected. “It’s not my idea of fun.”

“Oh, that's a lie!” She poked him. The two then grabbed the loose bags of chips, making a second attempt to fit them in the pantry. His mother raised her voice as the bags of chips crinkled in their ears.

“I’ve seen you in a book store–left on your own you’ll spend all day there.”

“That’s different.”

“I don’t think so.” She said, pushing the last bag in. David was sure most of these chips were broken by this point. Jackie closed the pantry with a sigh.

“Either way,” she continued. “I’m glad you went out. I feel like you’ve been spending all summer in the house.”

David let out a heavy sigh.

“Jackie– Mom ,” David quickly corrected himself. His mother hated it when he used her first name. While Michael didn’t care, it drove her insane, but old habits die hard. When he was a baby and learning how to speak, his parents made the fatal mistake of saying the phrases “ Michael !” and “Damn, Jackie !” more often than “mommy” or “daddy”. When Jay was born his mother was quick to learn from her mistake.

“You’ve already made your point,” he went on. Several times.

“I know, but you haven’t listened.” Jackie said, arms crossed. Her tone wasn’t harsh, but was actually quite gentle, careful. He never knew how to act when she spoke to him like this because it felt like she was walking on eggshells with him.

To be fair, she probably was. It wasn’t like David hadn’t been doing the same thing for the better part of the year.

“I just think…” Jackie paused, considering her words. “...That after everything that happened last summer…You deserve to have fun this year.”

“I have fun,” He said uselessly, leaning against the counter to distance himself from his mother.

“Moping around the house is not fun.” She narrowed her eyes at him.

“I’m not moping .”

“Look baby,” Jackie closed the gap, cupping his cheeks. “It’s already been a few weeks into the summer and this is the first time you went out for something that wasn’t work. I don’t care what it is you do, but I want you to enjoy yourself. You’re going into your senior year next year! So…just…try to have fun? Okay?”

There was a moment of silence that was only disturbed by the munching of chips and beeping of Michael’s video game. David sighed, giving his mother’s words serious consideration.

“...Okay.” He said with a slight shrug. “Okay, I’ll try. I’ll–Maybe I’ll go out with Jay and…I don't know, hang out with his friends. Meet his girlfriend finally.”

Jackie beamed, clapping her hands.

“That’s it!!” David was unable to avoid the hard kiss Jackie planted on his cheek. “That’s what I like to hear. Okay, go let the dogs out and get out of the house. Go, go, go!”


David sighed, rubbing her lipstick off his cheek. As he corralled the dogs together and let them out in the backyard, he thought that maybe his mother really did have a point. He’s been a bit isolated ever since last summer and the idea of actually getting out of the house did sound refreshing. Besides, he wanted to see what this Leia girl was all about.

Leia was so thankful that Jay and her got over the Almost Kissed debacle. The whole thing had been like a rock nesting in the pit of her stomach for the better part of the year. To have it out, as well as dealt with, was like a weight lifted off her shoulders. She just felt terrible about Nikki and Nate… She wanted to do something to fix it, but Jay assured her that it was best to stay out of it. He said that Nate and Nikki have their ups and downs but always get back together, so why should this be any different?

Leia wasn’t so sure…but Jay knew them better than she did, so she trusted his judgment. 

Maybe it was selfish, but she just felt so happy that things worked out with her and Jay and that she was okay not worrying about Nate and Nikki for a little while. To celebrate the two getting over their first big fight, Jay took Leia to Applebees and told her he had a surprise for her.

Leia loved surprises! Gwen told her not to get her hopes up, but how could she not! Her boyfriend had a surprise for her!

Sitting next to Jay in a booth at Applebees, Leia was excitedly eating the appetizers they had ordered, hardly able to sit still.

“Oh I can’t wait anymore!” She giggled when Jay played with her hair. “Come on, please tell me the surprise?”

“Don’t worry, it’s almost time,” Jay grinned, checking his watch.

“Is it a special delivery situation?” She asked. “Because I love singing telegrams!”

“What’s a telegram?” Jay asked, brows furrowed. Before Leia had a chance to explain the absolute thrill of being delivered something with song and dance, Jay looked around the restaurant and grinned.

“He’s here! HEY! OVER HERE!!”

He? Leia thought, looking over Jay’s shoulder, gasping. Oh god.

As David approached the booth, Leia could already feel the humiliation crawling over her skin, making her sweat.

“Dude, what took you so long?” Jay asked as David shrugged off his jean jacket.

“Parking was a nightmare.” David said, tossing the jacket on his side of the booth as he looked up. Leia could see in his eyes that he remembered her and that made the sweating worse.

“David, this is Leia, my girlfriend,” Jay said, grinning happily. “Leia, this is David, my big brother!”

“....Leia.” David said slowly. “...How nice to meet you.”

Thank god, Leia thought.

“N–Nice to meet you too! For the very first time uh–I uh–Jay I never knew you had a brother!! At all! Not a single clue.”

“Huh? I was sure I told you about him.””

“I’d be worried if all you talked to your girlfriend about was me.” David said, sliding into the booth easily. “So no hard feelings. Jay, get me a drink, will you?”

“Oh, the waiter will make her rounds–”

Drink , Jay.”

“I’ll be right back.” Jay moved at lightning speed at the stern tone his brother gave him, almost knocking over a busboy as he beelined for the restaurant bar.

“So,” David started when Jay was out of sight. “Is Leia short for Leianna?”

Leia groaned, covering her face.

No ,” She said past her hands. “No, it’s not. Look! Before you think I’m a total weirdo, Gwen put the name tag on me! It was just–weird timing! So I really don’t work at Hot Topic–Well, actually I might be applying soon–A-And I had no idea you were Jay’s brother!! I really didn’t know he had a brother actually so–”

“Whoa, whoa,” David waved his hands around to get Leia’s attention. “Take a breath, damn. It’s not a big deal.”

“It's not?” She asked, eyes wide.

“Not even,” David leaned back. “Just kind of funny, that’s all. Good to know you don’t have some double life I need to tell my brother about.” Leia managed to breathe out a small laugh.

“Aha….Yeah, no…Nothing like that.”

“It’s cool–Just wanted to get the story straight. Especially since you looked like your head was about to explode when you saw me.” Leia frowned, touching her cheeks.

“Explode feels a bit extreme.”

“You didn’t see how red your face got.” He chuckled, taking an appetizer. “Mm–Actually, while we’re on the topic, I’ve wanted to ask you something for a long time now.”

Leia sat up, blinking.

“Oh? Oh, sure uh–what is it?”

“...Are you named after uh—the Star Wars character? Like, Princess Leia? Because if not you should tell Jay he’s been mispronouncing your name.”

Leia’s face dropped as she slumped in her seat.

“....Yes. Yes I am…” she sighed. “My dad’s…kind of a big nerd.”

She could tell that David got the sense that she was a bit embarrassed, because he made a move to reassure her.

“Hey, there are worse things to be named after. As far as characters go, Princess Leia’s a badass, right?” He gave a shrug. “I mean–My mom named me after David Bowie.”

“...That’s way cooler than being named after a space princess.”

David paused, nodding.

“Yeah, that's true,” He agreed, before; “Oh! If you ask Jay what his name means, he’ll say he’s named after our mom’s first initial–Jackie–but really, our dad just really likes the letter ‘J’.”

That got a laugh out of Leia.

“Wait, really? That's kind of funny.”

“Yeah, Kelso’s are funny that way.” David chuckled.

Leia thought Gwen might have David all wrong. He seemed really nice.

Jay came back then, a little breathless as he set David’s cup in front of him. David made a face when he saw how wet the cup and Jay’s hand’s were.

“...I might have spilled it rushing back and had to refill it again.” Jay explained.

“I’ll forgive you this time.” David shook his head, drying the glass off with the napkins on the table.

“He always forgives me,” Jay whispered to Leia with a grin. Leia smiled wide–Jay seemed happy in a way she hadn’t seen before. He seemed really excited that David was here. Gwen did tell her that Jay and his brother were pretty close, so it must be a big deal for Leia to meet him.

“So uh, David!” Leia started after the waiter came and took their order. “How come it’s taken us this long to meet? I never saw you around last summer or when I came for spring break.”

“Oh, that’s because David was at camp.” Jay answered before David had a chance.

“Oh, like summer camp?” Leia asked.

“Bible camp!”

Leia watched David pinch the bridge of his nose when Jay answered.

“...Oh, uh–That sounds….fun?” She said awkwardly. She wouldn’t say it, but David certainly did not look like the religious type. David gave a tight smile that did not quite reach his eyes.

“Loads.” He said, shaking his head. “Uh–Yeah. I’ve just been AWOL lately but uh… I’m here now. So.”

Wanting to shake the awkward air that only Jay seemed oblivious to, Leia tapped the table and smiled.

“Well, hey! Now that you’re around, you should come hang out with us.” She said, “A bunch of us get together in my basement over the summer and–the more the merrier!” Jay gasped, grinning.

“Dude! Yes! You should totally come!” He practically vibrated. “It’s so cool–and Leia’s grandparents never come down–oh, except when her grandma makes cookies, which are super awesome. Especially when you got the munchies.” Jay winked.

“Yeah?” David raised a brow. “You don’t mind?”

“Not at all!” Leia smiled. “It’ll be fun!”

Maybe it was unnecessary, but Leia took it upon herself to straighten up the basement in preparation for David to join them. She dusted, filled the freezer with popsicles and even put out a bowl of assorted snacks. Leia went and collated a bunch of VHS’s just in case there was nothing on TV and fluffed the pillows on the old couch. Gwen told her, several times, she was overdoing it, but Leia wanted it to look cool .

“Oh sweet, doritos!” Nate grinned when he and Ozzie entered the basement. Leia slapped his hand when he grabbed a handful.

“Save some!” She insisted. “We have a guest joining us today.”

“A guest? Is it a famous person?” Nate gasped suddenly before whispering with great seriousness. “Cindy Crawford?”

“No, you idiot.” Gwen rolled her eyes. “And he’s hardly a guest. She invited David to hang out.”

“....Wait,” Nate paused, eyes wide. “David? As in Jay’s brother? You invited Jay's brother over?”

“Of course.” Leia smiled before backing up in surprise when Nate let out a loud whine.

Nooo !” he cried. “This was my safe zone!!”

“Uh, what is he talking about?” Leia asked as Nate buried his face in his hands.

“Nate and David don’t exactly get along,” Ozzie explained with thinly veiled amusement.

“That’s an understatement,” Gwen snorted. “David’s had it out for Nate for as long as I can remember.”

“When we were kids,” Nate exclaimed, standing up in a panic. “He sat on my head and made me eat dirt! And then he put it down my pants and told everyone I pooped myself!”

Gwen let out a laugh, slapping her thigh.

“Our mom made him wear diapers for two months after that.”

And !!” Nate carried on. “I’m pretty sure when we were little he messed with my training wheels on my first bike! I fell off and lost my front baby teeth!”

“Oh wow…” Leia grimaces as Nate drops down on the couch in misery. “But–That’s when you were kids. Surely things have calmed down now that you’re older. Besides, David seems so nice.”

As if summoned, David and Jay both entered the basement. Leia backed up, watching as Nate and David made eye contact. Nate’s eyes were wide and the color drained from his face.

“D-David…”

“Nathen.” David said, tone flat. Jay grabbed David’s arm, shaking it.

“You promised you’d be nice.”

“I’m nice.” David said, shrugging Jay’s hands off before looking at Leia with a smile.

“Leia, good to see you again. Nice basement.”

“Oh, thanks….Um–We have snacks! And drinks–if you want anything else I can run upstairs and get it!”

“Cool,” he nodded, walking around the couch, glancing at the room before looking down at Nate.

“Move.”

Nate practically threw himself off the back of the couch with a yell. Once the seat was vacated, David sat down, crossing his legs.

Oh, Leia thought. This was going to be an… interesting dynamic. 




“Red!! Oh Red!”

Red sighed and stayed still and quiet, hoping Kitty wouldn’t sense him reading the paper in the living room. He just wanted to finish reading the sports column in peace as he knew Kitty had plans for him the rest of the day–and who knew what trouble those kids were likely to get into. This was the only moment he had, right now, where he can be at peace with his paper.

Alas, Kitty sniffed him out. 

“Red, oh you’ll never guess who called!”

“I probably won’t.” Red sighed, trying to focus on the words in front of him.

“It was Steven !” Kitty exclaimed. “He said he has some free time and is going to come to visit! Oh–Oh I need to buy a turkey– Red, get up, we have to go to the store!”

Red sighed heavily. Goddamnit, he thought. While he normally didn’t mind when Steven came to visit, the house was already so damn full to begin with. Red looked to his wife, who was practically flying off the handle as she found her notepad, writing down all the things she probably did not need to buy but was likely to anyway.

The school year could not come sooner.