Chapter Text
The next day, Touya finally feels some of his strength returning, thanks to the constant influx of fluids and food that Eraserhead and Keigo have been shoving down his throat. He hadn’t been able to eat more than some miso soup and a few bites of rice yesterday, but now he was able to slowly eat a whole bowl of noodles in some hearty broth with vegetables and meat, so that was an improvement.
Eraserhead shuffles around the room, cleaning up the used bandages from Touya’s palm before taking a seat in the same chair he had sat in the day before. Touya wishes Keigo were here to be a buffer, but the bird was taking some much-needed time to shower and rest. Apparently, Touya was a handful to deal with, rude , so Eraserhead was his designated babysitter for the time being.
Even they know you can’t be trusted by yourself.
“So, do we have to worry about you running again or are you ready to hear us out?”
Touya stiffens. After yesterday, he could admit to himself that Keigo was telling the truth. That he was on their side. But he also wasn’t sure what that meant for the future. How exactly was he supposed to move forward, get his life back on track?
“Do I have a choice? I don’t have a home, or a job, or anything else to go back to. It’s just me and Shouto now. Seems like you have us right where you want us.”
I’m not enough on my own.
Eraserhead scoffs, shaking his head. “Did you two even talk at all?”
“What do you mean?”
The hero pauses for a moment, studying his face. “Hawks has been paying your rent and your boss at that flower shop didn’t seem too keen on letting you go. Told us to get you back home so you could get back to work. Not to mention Inko and Mitsuki have been breathing down our necks since we started looking for you. They’ve been worried sick. You’ve got more to go back to than you seem to think, Touya.”
Touya weakly shakes his head, eyes blurring with tears. He didn’t understand, couldn’t understand. Why were these people so blind to his failure? Why weren’t they throwing him away like his father had? Instead, they were making room for him, for the burden that was his existence. Going out of their way to make sure he was happy and comfortable.
There was no reason for Keigo to keep up on his rent. What if he’d been gone for longer? Would he still be waiting? Saving a place for them to go back to? And Hana. That damned woman. She could have found someone else to help out at the shop, anyone else. So why was she waiting for him? His heart clenches in his chest. Inko. Mitsuki. Why did they care so much?
It doesn’t make sense.
“You know,” Eraserhead continues, “there are two more people I can think of that’d love to be part of your life.”
An unbidden image of a little girl with glasses, red streaks in her hair comes to mind, a bright-eyed boy with spiky gray hair trailing behind her.
“Come play with us Touya-nii!” Natsuo bounces a ball against the ground.
Touya is sitting at his computer, waiting for his father to leave for patrol so he could sneak out to train. “I’m busy, Nat. You and Fumi go play.”
“You’re always busy, Touya-nii. Pleaseeee?” Natsuo whines.
“Come on Touya. You never play with us anymore.” Fuyumi’s lips turn into a pout.
Touya hunches his shoulders inward, bringing his knees to his chest and wrapping his arms around himself. “I abandoned them. They must hate me.”
“They miss you.”
Outside the room, Touya can hear a muffled conversation, the tension in his shoulders bleeding out at the lower tone of Keigo’s voice.
How far gone am I that his voice brings me peace?
“How are they?” he mumbles, keeping his head bowed.
“Fuyumi is in her last year of high school. She’s planning on going to university for early childhood education in the spring. She gets along with my son, Hitoshi, really well. I think he’s helped her cope with Shouto’s absence. She talks about both of you a lot.”
Fuyumi, an elementary teacher. A perfect career for her, Touya thinks. Even as Shouto was kept separate from them, she tried her hardest to care for the boy from behind the scenes. If Touya had to guess, she felt that teaching the next generation was her repentance for not being there for Shouto the way she thought she should.
His sister had always been one to place all the burden on herself, to fix everyone’s broken pieces. But she never understood. Fixing everything shouldn’t be her job, her responsibility. Not when Endeavor was the one to break them in the first place.
“Natsuo is starting high school in the spring. He’s already talking about how he wants to go into the medical field. Apparently he wants to specialize in patients with unstable or dangerous quirks.” Eraserhead raises a brow at him. “He harbors a lot of guilt for what happened to you. You’re clearly very special to him.”
Touya sniffles, a hand brushing away the wetness from his cheeks. Natsuo always was his best friend, his confidant, the one person in that house who understood his struggles. The one person who never looked at him like he was a failure or a crybaby. He missed his brother terribly, even when he tried to push those feelings down to focus on Shouto.
He didn’t want to dwell on the idea of Natsuo being a doctor to help people like him. The weight of that decision, the fact that Natsuo was so sure of what he wanted his future to be, and how Touya had helped shape that future, was hard to stomach. He didn’t deserve to be anyone’s foundation, let alone the foundation of the brother he’d abandoned.
“I wanted to get them out. I didn’t want to leave them. But…”
“Endeavor never harmed them. Not physically anyways. Although I can’t possibly condone kidnapping, only taking Shouto was the right choice. I wish you’d gotten the police or a hero involved instead, but I’ve read how that worked out for you in the past, and I understand. I’m just sorry that you felt you had to make that kind of drastic choice to keep your brother safe.”
“I still should’ve been there!” His voice grows stronger. “I left them. And the worst part is, I never planned on going back. I was okay with never seeing them again, if it meant Shouto was safe. How could they not hate me?”
I would if I were them.
“You’ll have to ask them. If you want to, that is.”
“I don’t know…”
“Just something to think about. No need to make any decisions yet.”
Touya leans his head back against the headboard, closing his eyes. “Yeah. Okay.” The conversation is zapping what little energy he’s recovered out of him.
He hears Eraserhead get up from the chair, shuffling towards the doorway. “We should be able to leave for Fukuoka in the morning. I’d suggest getting some rest before then.”
Touya doesn’t answer as the hero walks out, leaving the door open a crack. He just sits back with his eyes closed, taking a moment to clear his head. He hears Keigo’s low chuckle from the other room and he can’t help the upward twitch of his lips.
He wanted to see Fuyumi and Natsuo. Hell, he’d give anything to see them again. But he worried he was being selfish, dredging up the bloody, charred remains of the child they knew just to have a relationship with them. Sure, they may miss him, but they were getting on without him perfectly fine. Both of them had goals and a future that he wasn’t sure he fit into anymore.
You would just screw everything up, same as you always do. Let them live in peace.
Would them seeing him alive hurt them even more? If he could avoid that, avoid hurting anyone else with his painful existence, he would. Although, he’s not sure that’s even an option anymore. Endeavor’s trial would be beginning soon and Touya wasn’t stupid. He knew Eraserhead was still betting on him and Shouto being involved. Fuyumi and Natsuo would have to find out at some point. So maybe he should just rip off the bandaid and see what consequence awaited him.
A knock at the door has him opening his eyes and looking over. Keigo is standing there with one hand on the doorknob, looking uncertain and a little vulnerable. So out of character for the usually confident hero. Cute.
He’s got on black joggers that ride low on his hips and a light gray t-shirt that clings to his biceps like a second skin. His hair looks damp, like he’d just taken a shower. He’s so fucking beautiful it hurts. Even after all this time apart, Touya can’t help the swell of adoration and arousal and something even deeper that he doesn’t want to address right now at just seeing the hero.
“Uh, the kids just went to bed and Aizawa’s in for the night. I thought we could maybe hang out and…talk?” Keigo shifts from foot to foot, a nervous blush covering his cheeks.
Touya doesn’t answer, instead moving over on the bed to make room. Keigo takes the invitation, shutting the door behind him before coming to sit down next to him.
“So, what’s on your mind, birdy?”
“You, mostly,” Keigo says with a teasing smirk. Touya chuckles, rolling his eyes at the easy retort. His hand itches at his side, so he reaches over, taking Keigo’s hand in his and interlacing their fingers.
The way they fall back into each other, how the callouses on Keigo’s hands are familiar against his skin, how he leans into Keigo like he’s his source of warmth, should terrify him. In some ways, it does terrify him. Keigo owns more of him than he thinks. He always has. Even while he was gone, Touya could never get him out of his head.
“Seriously though, it’s mostly you. Part of me still can’t believe you’re here.”
“I can’t believe I’m here.” Touya bows his head, focusing on Keigo’s thumb as it caresses slow circles into the back of his hand. “I was just so scared. I froze when I saw him. I didn’t think I’d freeze like that. I’ve had so much time to prepare. I should be able to face him. But in the end, I just ran. Like a coward.”
Weak. Pathetic.
“There’s nothing cowardly about you, Touya.”
He meets Keigo’s eyes, bright and warm and focused on him. “How can you even say that after all this?”
“You made a decision with the information you had at the time. Your first priority has always been your brother’s safety. You’ve put everything, everything , on the line for him. You’ve dedicated your life to him. What exactly is so cowardly about that?”
The words wash over him, lapping at the sharp edges of his mind, dulling the bite of his own vicious thoughts. He feels his whole foundation, everything he’s been standing on for so long, slowly erode beneath his feet. But Keigo’s there to make sure he doesn’t get swept away. He’s always there.
“Why do you do it?”
“Why do I do what, baby?” Keigo’s voice is soft, soothing.
“You keep coming back, keep trying to help me, be there for me. Why?”
Keigo leans in closer and Touya falls into spiraling gold. “I told you before. There’s something about you that’s absolutely captivating. I can’t help myself.”
“That was before everything happened.”
“My feelings haven’t changed, Touya. If anything, they’ve gotten stronger with every day that goes by. The only change is that I’d like to think I know a little bit more about what is so captivating about you. Now that I’ve gotten the chance to know you.”
“Yeah? You think you know me?” Touya leans in. He can feel Keigo’s breath, honey and cinnamon, on his skin, their noses brushing. Tension crackles in the air around them.
“Yeah. You’re the most selfless, compassionate person I’ve ever met. You put everyone else before you, always, like you think they deserve happiness more than you. You are hard working and determined and tenacious. You’re a better parent figure at 18 than most people are in general and Shouto absolutely adores you.”
Keigo’s hand comes up to cup his cheek and Touya sucks in a breath at the contact.
“You love cheesy horror movies and musicals equally, even if you won’t admit it. You like taking care of the people you care about, like when you make me food and yell at me about not getting enough sleep. You hate fish and summer, which is crazy, by the way.”
I don’t hate summer. My body just doesn’t like the heat,” Touya grumbles.
Keigo smirks before continuing on. “You scrunch your nose when you pretend to get offended by something, and it’s fucking adorable.” He chuckles. “Yeah, like that.” He nudges his nose against Touya’s scrunched one.
“Smug bastard,” Touya mutters under his breath.
“Even though you said it was black, your favorite color is actually blue because you’re a conceited brat and secretly love your fire, even if you think it’s destructive.”
It is destructive.
“You are self conscious of your scars. You think they prove that you failed, that you’re meant to burn.” Touya’s throat constricts. “But you’re wrong. Your scars are proof that you live, and they’re so fucking beautiful. Because you’re beautiful. Every single inch, every single part, of you.”
No. You’re defective. A failure.
Lies. Lies. Lies.
Touya tries to pull away, his head pounding with contradictions, but Keigo keeps him place with the hand on his cheek moving to curl around the back of his neck. He feels like he’s being pulled in two different directions in a violent game of tug of war between the monster in his head and Keigo.
Keigo’s voice turns serious, his eyes piercing through him. “Before I met you, I was coasting through life with a shallow vision of the future, chasing a dream that wasn’t fully mine. My days bled together into one giant blur that I never cared to focus on. But then you showed up with that wicked tongue, cursing me out for saving you, and it’s like I suddenly woke up. For the first time, I actually thought about what my future would look like. All I could picture was you. You and Shouto.”
How can you still look at me like I have a future? Like I should be allowed to be part of your future? After everything I’ve done…
Keigo’s eyes shine with unshed tears, his voice a whisper against Touya’s skin. “Without even meaning to, you saved me from the dull existence that was my life. Touya Todoroki, you became my hero. How could I not be captivated?”
A whimper falls from Touya’s mouth as his lips collide with Keigo’s, hunger and ferocity bubbling up in his chest, guiding him on. Keigo kisses him back like he’s starved, making up for all the time they’ve lost. His lips are soft but firm, the paradox making Touya’s head swim with need.
Keigo licks the seam of his lips and Touya lets him in, drinking in the groan that falls from Keigo’s mouth as he finds his tongue ring, circling around it before exploring the rest of his mouth. Every atom in Touya’s body vibrates, his head going radio silent, all his senses honed in on Keigo . He can’t get close enough, can’t taste enough of him, to quench this thirst inside him.
He shifts on the bed until he’s straddling Keigo, hands in his hair, pulling on the strands to angle his head back. Keigo’s hands move to his waist, his fingers gripping hard enough to bruise. Red wings curl around them, blocking out all the light.
Touya pulls back, resting his forehead against Keigo’s. “You’re so heroic it makes me nauseous. You can’t take care of yourself to save your life, which is ironic by the way, and you’re absolutely hopeless at keeping to a schedule. Honestly, I don’t know how you’ve survived on your own for this long.”
“ Touya… ” Hands travel up, under his shirt, before scratching lightly down his back.
“You hate cheesy horror movies, but love watching them with me because it’s an excuse to be all clingy. As if you need one. You prefer sunset to sunrise. You’re actually more of an introvert than everyone else likes to believe, and you cherish your peace and quiet.”
Lips travel down his neck, goosebumps dotting his arms.
“You make these cute little noises whenever you let your guard down and I wish you wouldn’t hide them, you deserve to sing like the bird you are. I also wish you’d tell people to back off when they try touching your wings, because I know they’re sensitive and I know you don’t like them being touched without your permission.”
Keigo claims his lips with urgency, a soft chirp leaving his mouth like a whimper. His feathers ruffle happily around them, the soft plumes brushing against Touya’s skin like a caress.
“You think you’re the only one captivated, birdy? I’m fucking obsessed with you, it’s terrifying. I hate how vulnerable it makes me feel, I hate how helpless I am when it comes to you. But I can’t stop myself. I tried, I really did, to forget you, but it was hopeless.”
Touya can feel Keigo’s heart pound beneath his hands as he rests them on his chest, the hero wrapping his arms around him like a vice.
“I missed you so fucking much, Keigo.” His eyes burn as tears track down his cheeks. “Every day felt like absolute fucking torture. I’m so sorry. So, so sorry, birdy.”
“ Touya…” Keigo’s voice shakes before Touya claims his lips again, swallowing any response he could have had.
Touya breaks away, mouthing along Keigo’s jaw and down his neck. Keigo tilts his head away, giving him more access. Touya’s hands wander down, grabbing the hem of the hero’s shirt and pulling up.
“Off. Now.”
Hands stop him in place, gently prying his fingers from the fabric. “Touya…baby…slow down.”
The cold rejection washes over him, freezing his breath in his lungs. He must’ve read the signs wrong, tricked himself into believing he was worthy of such an intimate gesture.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid Touya.
“I - I….you don’t want…but…”
Keigo’s eyes widen in a panic and he wraps his arms around Touya when he attempts to get off his lap. “No, no, no. Not like that. Touya, god, of course I want you. Are you kidding me?!”
“Then why…”
“Taking this next step…it’s a big deal. For both of us.” Keigo’s eyes are steady on him, like he’s trying to drill the words straight into his brain. “I want our first time together to be memorable. Special. Not in a random safe house with people in the other room, seconds from barging in.”
Touya huffs in disapproval, rolling his eyes, but relaxes against Keigo’s chest. “Yeah, okay,” he mutters begrudgingly, his lips pulling into a pout.
Keigo kisses his temple, his hand moving up and down his back soothingly. “I meant it when I said I wanted you, Touya. Don’t you dare doubt that.”
“Yes, sir.” Touya smirks when Keigo growls low in his throat, tightening his hold on him.
Of course the hero would have an authority kink. Duly noted.
He melts into Keigo’s arms, burying his head in the crook of his neck, savoring the feel of warm hands moving up and down his back in soft circles. A kiss lands on the side of his head, lingering there against his skin.
“You have no idea how much I missed you, Touya.” Keigo’s hand moves to grip his chin roughly between his fingers. “Don’t you ever do that to me again, do you understand me?”
Touya shivers at the low growl of the command, his stomach flipping and his breath catching. The devious part of him wants to defy the hero, talk back and see just how far he can push. His mouth curls up in a mischievous smirk as he’s met with golden irises, narrowing, challenging him to continue and promising retribution for his smart mouth.
“Touya-nii?”
The soft voice from outside their feathered bubble douses him like a bucket of cold water, bringing Touya squarely back to reality. Reminding him that if there is a god, he has a sick, twisted sense of humor that Touya is constantly on the receiving end of. There’s no other explanation.
“Speaking of barging in.” Keigo chuckles, gently knocking their foreheads together and kissing the tip of his nose.
“I swear to god, he’s got a second cock-blocking quirk,” Touya groans.
“Wouldn’t it technically be his third quirk?”
Touya glares at him as he fixes himself and untangles from Keigo’s lap. Red feathers retract to find Shouto standing patiently at the edge of the bed, like the world is on his time.
“What’s up, Sho?”
Shouto wrings his hands. “I can’t sleep…but…” His eyes shift from Touya to Keigo and back, an uncertain look on his face.
Touya sighs, eyes softening. He turns to Keigo. “Stay?”
Keigo nods, eyes brimming with adoration. “Always.”
God, I’m obsessed with you.
“Come on, brat. Get in here.”
Keigo and Touya both lay down, Touya opening his arms out for Shouto to crawl into, right between them. The boy curls against him, fists curling in Touya’s shirt. Keigo waits until they’re settled before laying a wing over top of them, holding them both close.
There’s a sense of deja vu, of familiarity that makes him want to sob, heart wrenching in his chest. The scene is so similar to what he’d fallen asleep to all those weeks ago, after the world found out about Touya. And after all that time, the three of them snuggled together still feels right. Like that’s where they were always meant to be. Like no time had passed at all.
When Keigo kisses him on the forehead, Touya in turn buries his head in the crook of his neck, deeply breathing in the hero’s familiar scent. With each breath, each inhale of the hero’s bergamot and vanilla body wash, his monster retreats further into the recesses of his mind. Defeated, if just for this one moment.