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Alessa strolled through the warm streets of the small town, accompanied by Harding and Neve. The town was on the border of Antiva and Tevinter, and its architecture reflected that blend in an interesting way. Buildings with the elegant, sun baked stone details of Antiva stood side by side with structures adorned in Tevinter’s more strict and imposing style. The streets were somewhat alive with the mixed accents and vibrant fabrics, the fusion of the two cultures creating a unique atmosphere.
But, if there was one thing both cultures here shared at the moment, was fear of the Qunari attacks possibly turning their eyes onto the small town.
As they walked, Alessa reflected on her hesitations. Initially, she had struggled with the idea of finding a gift for Lucanis. It wasn’t that she lacked the desire; it was the feeling of inadequacy that plagued her, something she shook her head at since it felt funny, weird. Lucanis was born into the most powerful House, had access to the finest weapons, armor, and clothes that his wealth could afford. How could she, coming from a background in the Ferelden alienage of Denerim, cast out Warden that was saved and cured and indebted to De’Riva, where she had pieced together fabrics from childhood to Blight to make her own clothes had followed into her time as a Crow… find something meaningful for him?
During the Blight, Alessa had learned to be resourceful, she had to be with half the country hating her, assassins hunting her, crafting makeshift solutions from whatever was available along the way. Zevran understood this well; he too had been born and raised to make the best of what he had. But how did one navigate the challenge of finding a gift for someone who had always had the best of everything? How could she offer something that held genuine value when compared to a life of privilege?
The first week was very interesting in the lighthouse, and traveling by enluvian for supplies… It was very different from the constant camping like during the Blight. Not to mention the coin flowed better now versus then too.
Alessa’s thoughts were interrupted by the lively sights and sounds of the marketplace. The town’s food stalls offered a rich mix of goods and the smell of spices that attracted Harding into checking one out. Merchants sold fine Antivan wines and pastries, while the one beside it had different selections of meat on a stick for a quick grab and go.
The elf did not know if she was shaking her head at the excited face of her friend or her own cowardice, but initial doubts were pushed aside as Alessa decided to just go ahead and buy Lucanis something special. It wasn’t just about the Treviso coffee, though she knew how much he appreciated it. It was about showing him that she valued him, especially after their slow opening up and covering each other's asses in missions. She had given gifts to the rest of the team over the past two months—small tokens of appreciation for their camaraderie and support. Even cooking Harding a hearty Ferelden dish that both had missed dearly from their homeland. Though the assassin felt horribly out of practice with the lamb chop and mashed potatoes, it had been years since she ate, let alone cooked, Fereleden’s food. The look on the dwarf’s face was worth the effort though.
If Lucanis ever admitted he started liking the backwards country’s dish… the world was truly ending. That’s the running joke with her husband and Alistiar anyways.
The elf had done this during the Blight and it had boosted morale, even softened the hardened team members, cough Morrigan and Sten, cough. Asking the mage a few questions at a time and giving her jewelry gifts since she always looked at the gems that were beautifully crafted, or just listen to her when she spoke without being riled up. Sten was easier once she found that he loved cookies, and always bought pastries since the Qun seemed to not make those.
With this in mind, Alessa would try to observe her new team and see what they liked or disliked. Davrin was the easiest ever, just had to find something for Assan to play with and play with the griffin. And being a former Warden herself, it was easy to talk to the elven man and share vague experiences… She was still ‘Rook’ to everyone here except for Lucanis. Yet, she had not managed to give anything to her fellow Crow, which made her feel a pang of guilt. Like as if she had been neglecting their slow friendship, confusing feelings she had been having lately about the man aside.
The trio walked the marketplace one last time, the half Antivan paused in front of a stall showcasing intricate jewelry and hand-carved trinkets. Her eyes were drawn to a necklace with a silver feather, adorned with fine engravings that hinted at the Antivan craftsmanship. She imagined Lucanis wearing it.
Turning to Harding and Neve, she gave a small smile. “I think I’ve found what I need here. Just give me a moment.”
Harding nodded, eyes already scanning a nearby stall for the supplies she had thought they missed on the list. But, at the elf’s subtle shake of her head a smile formed on the red head’s face, Alessa knew she had to be grinning as she turned to walk over to the jewelry stall. Neve gave a quick nod before returning her attention to the crowd, mentioning something about how late it was getting and it would be wise to return soon.
Alessa approached the stall, where a middle-aged merchant with pale skin and wrinkles of age greeted her warmly. His Tevinter accent was thick, he spoke Antivan with a deliberate slowness that told her the words tasted weird on the tongue, but the calmness that made Alessa feel at ease. This was a small but pleasant surprise; she was accustomed to encountering prejudice, Tevinter being the worst place, but the merchant’s demeanor was courteous and respectful.
“ Buenos noches para ti ,” Alessa said, her voice warm as she approached. “I’m interested in this necklace.” She pointed to the silver feather pendant, admiring its delicate craftsmanship up close. She could see the tiny purple lines in between the silver and it drew her in even more.
The merchant’s eyes lit up with interest. “Ah, a fine choice, señora . This piece is handcrafted by one of our finest artisans. The feather is symbolic for both freedom and insight. In Antivan culture, a crow’s feather often represents the ability to see beyond the ordinary, to understand and navigate through life’s complexities with clarity. It also symbolizes the infamous assassins guild, so I would be careful wearing this.”
Alessa nodded, appreciating the explanation even though she knew all of this already, but it was the polite thing to do and hide her grin about the assassin part. Even if his slightly pointed look seemed to harbor more than it led on. “It’s beautiful. I was also wondering about this dagger charm here. Could I have it added to the necklace?”
The merchant’s gaze shifted to the small charm, his expression thoughtful. “Certainly. The dagger is of strength and courage. In tradition a dagger charm is often worn for protection and to symbolize bravery in the face of difficult times. It’s a reminder to confront challenges with resilience.” He paused for a moment. “Adding it to the necklace will make it quite unique. I can have it attached for you, but it will take a few moments.”
Alessa’s smile widened. “That would be wonderful. How much will it be?”
The merchant named a price, which Alessa agreed to without hesitation. She had the coin on hand after all. ‘Oh, how I can hear Alistair, Leliana, and Zevran banter about us being broke again if they were here.’ Her thoughts drifted for a moment as he carefully wrapped the necklace and charm in a small, velvet-lined box, her eyes never leaving the little piece of metal. He spoke again, his tone kind and reassuring. “I must say, it is rare to see such grace and kindness from someone of your kind.”
Alessa’s eyebrows lifted slightly, surprised by his words. “Thank you. It’s kind of you to say so.”
Did he suspect what she was? Or was it just her ears on full display with her hair up in its bun?
The merchant shrugged slightly, his gaze meeting hers with a touch of understanding. “I… I see you are not just another traveler. You have a sense of respect that is rare to find.”
She tried not to overthink the words, best not to.
With the transaction complete, Alessa took the velvet-lined box, feeling a surge of satisfaction, giddiness, and somewhat nervous to give it to the very person who has been confusing her for two months now. The necklace, now with the added dagger charm, was a questionable but somehow knowing expression of her feelings for Lucanis. As she made her way back to Harding and Neve, the warmth of the merchant’s unexpected kind but harsh reality of words lingered with her, adding a subtle something to her mood.
As she rejoined Harding and Neve, she felt a lightness in her step. The sun continued its descent, casting a warm, golden hue over the marketplace. Alessa’s thoughts were filled with a quiet contentment, ready to return to the lighthouse with a meaningful gift and the reassurance of a successful outing.
Alessa settled into her room, the soft glow of the evening light casting an eerie but oddly comforting hue over the space. Freshly bathed and feeling clean, she took her time unwinding, enjoying the simple act of combing her hair. The nightly ritual was a comforting one, and she let the comb glide through her light locks with a sense of calm. These days it is hard to have a calm moment to oneself.
She wore a short tie-around skirt and a crop halter top, comfortable yet light and stylish for a night in, though the short skirt borderline questionable. The gift she had found earlier that day was safely tucked away in its box on the nightstand, its presence both a comfort and the source of her nervous energy she felt. The box seemed to stare at her, daring her to waver, to shy away from the task of presenting it to Lucanis. The thought of gifting him something so personal made her heart race with anticipation and doubt.
‘Why? Why am I having this feeling?’
Alessa wondered how best to approach him. Lucanis’s schedule was anything but predictable. It was rare for him to be found resting at a normal hour; late at night he often spent time in the kitchen, cooking dishes at two in the morning, or in the training room, pushing himself to the limit until dawn. She had learned not to be surprised by his unusual hours or his relentless drive. But it wasn’t all the time and she didn’t want to wait for hours on end only to find it was a night he actually slept.
Sitting on the edge of her bed, she contemplated her options. The idea of simply tapping on his door and asking if he would join her for a walk crossed her mind. It was a casual and unassuming invitation, a way to share the gift without the weight of ceremony or formality. But she hesitated, knowing that waking him from sleep, should he actually be resting, was a delicate matter. He valued his rest as much as his work when he did sleep, and she didn’t want to intrude on his rare moments of peace.
With a sigh, Alessa set the comb aside and rose from the bed. She walked over to the nightstand and picked up the velvet-lined box, feeling its weight in her hands. Pacing the room for a few moments, the soft padding of her bare feet barely making a sound on the floor. Her thoughts swirled around her, trying to find the best approach. Perhaps she could write a short note, something simple, to accompany the gift if the direct approach felt too intrusive.
Taking a deep breath, but with the intention of being respectful and considerate of his space. She would gently tap on his door, and if he was awake, she would invite him for a walk, suggesting they enjoy a quiet moment together outside. If he was asleep, she would leave a note with the gift without interrupting his rest.
With her decision made, Alessa grabbed the box back on the nightstand and marched out the door before her overthinking made her back out. She took one last glance at her reflection in the body size mirror as she walked by. Within a few short strides to Lucanis’s door her heart pounded with both excitement and nervousness. She raised her hand to knock softly, her knuckles hovering just inches from the wooden surface. She took a deep breath, steadying herself before giving a soft knock. The sound seemed to echo in the quiet hallway, and she immediately felt her nerves spike, a sudden anxiety tightening her chest. What if he was asleep? Or worse, what if he didn’t want to be disturbed?
The short wait that followed felt like an eternity. She heard the faint rustle of movement from inside, and the door creaked open slightly, revealing Lucanis’s cautious expression. His dark eyes flicked over her, assessing the situation, before softening slightly in recognition. Dressed in his usually fine button up shirt and silk pants he liked to wear for relaxing, or relaxing as much as one could with such a high Vintatori bounty on their head.
“Alessa,” he greeted her, his voice low and even. There was a hint of curiosity in his tone, but also a guardedness that she couldn’t quite place.
“Lucanis,” she replied, managing a small smile despite the nerves fluttering in her stomach. “I hope I’m not interrupting.”
He hesitated, glancing back into his room as if debating whether to let her in or not. “No, not at all. I wasn’t doing much. Is there something you need?”
The elf could sense the mild unease in his voice, as if he were trying to gauge her intentions. Alessa swallowed, suddenly feeling the weight of the velvet-lined box in her pocket. This was harder than she’d anticipated.
‘Can’t back down now.’
“I was wondering if you might join me for a walk,” she suggested, her tone light but slightly hesitant. “I know it’s late, but... I thought it might be nice to get some air.”
Lucanis seemed to consider her words, his gaze searching her face for a moment longer than necessary. There was a flicker of something in his eyes—uncertainty, perhaps—but he eventually gave a small nod. “Sure. A walk sounds good.”
Relieved, Alessa nodded in return.
The two of them walked side by side down the dimly lit corridor, the silence between them heavy with unspoken thoughts. Alessa tried to think of something to say, anything to break the awkwardness that seemed to stretch between them, but every time she opened her mouth, the words died before they could form.
They stepped outside into the cool night air, the soft breeze a welcome contrast to the tension she felt. Even if it was imaginary.
As Alessa and Lucanis stepped outside, the world around them seemed to shimmer, as if reality itself was caught in a delicate balance between the real and the imagined. The sea that had been quiet and still moments ago now appeared almost surreal, bathed in an otherworldly glow. The street noise of their homeland sounded so far away yet close by, green shadows flickered with the faintest hints of movement, shadows that danced just beyond the edge of perception. The air was thick with a sense of unreality, as though they had stepped into a dream, or perhaps something more dangerous—the Fade.
‘How the hell does this man not have a headache the size of Antiva?’
The familiar sounds of the town—the distant roar of the sea, the occasional call of a night bird—were muted, as if heard through a thick fog. Even the lighthouse seemed slightly off, its light casting long, wavering shadows that didn’t quite align with the physical world. In a way it was Antiva City and not. The cool breeze that should have been refreshing now carried a strange weight, as if it were laden with unseen thoughts and emotions, whispers from the Fade itself.
Alessa felt a chill run down her spine, the hair on the back of her neck standing on end. She had been in the Fade twice before, but never physically. Fought through its twisted landscapes and faced the demons that lurked within. Recused dreamers and some spirits alike. But this was different—subtler, yet no less unsettling. She glanced at Lucanis, wondering if he felt it too, this strange dissonance that seemed to hum in the air around them. But his expression remained guarded, as if he too was trying to make sense of the distorted world they now found themselves living in. The slight narrowing of his eyes like as if they were out in the bright sun told her that he was most certainly affected to some degree.
As they walked, the floor underfoot seemed to shift ever so slightly with each step, as if they were treading on the surface of a pond rather than solid ground. The buildings around them, so translucent but familiar in their Antivan architecture, now seemed taller, their edges blurred and wavering. The decor took on a life of its own here, colors pulsing with a rhythm that matched neither time nor space. It was as if the Fade was bleeding into reality, or perhaps reality was being drawn into the Fade?
‘Solas knows, and no doubt would talk about it all day long if I gave him the chance.’ But the two elves did not see eye to eye, and were currently bitterly working together.
Her fellow Crow broke the silence with a low, cautious tone. “Do you feel it too?” He didn’t need to elaborate; she knew exactly what he was referring to.
Alessa nodded, her hand brushing against the small box in her pocket. “Yes, I do. We need to be careful.”
The words hung in the air, more than a warning, almost a plea. They both knew the dangers of the Fade, how it could twist perception, manipulate emotions, and make the unreal seem tangible. And here, in this strange green hooded twilight world, it was doing just that. Yet, despite the unsettling atmosphere, the lighthouse and its light flickering as though fighting against the encroaching darkness. Almost felt like home.
When they reached the top of the lighthouse, Alessa paused, her gaze fixed on the spiral staircase they had just walked up. The stairs seemed to stretch on forever behind them, curving into an unseen point that might have been the top or something far more distant. She swallowed hard, her heart pounding not just from the climb, but from the anticipation of now.
Lucanis noticed her hesitation and turned to face her, his expression unreadable. “Is there something you wanted to talk about?” he asked, his tone more gentle now, as if sensing her internal struggle. “We are alone.”
Alessa met his gaze, her hand instinctively reaching for the small box in her pocket. She nodded, finally finding the courage to speak. “Yes, there is…” Alessa and Lucanis stood at a respectful distance from each other, a natural courtesy between two Crows who had spent their lives in a world where trust was as fragile as Chantry glass.
The silence between them was not uncomfortable, but it was weighted, filled with things left unsaid. Alessa’s heart pounded in her chest, her mind racing as she tried to find the right words. It wasn’t often that she felt nervous, but tonight, standing here with Lucanis in this strange, dream and nightmare-like place, she could feel the anxiety bubbling up inside her. She glanced at him, catching the faint outline of his profile against the horizon, and felt a lump form in her throat.
The man finally broke the silence, his voice laced with a hint of amusement. “You’re the Hero of Ferelden, former Warden-Commander, now heir to House De’Riva, and yet you’re having a hard time spitting out whatever you brought me up here for.”
Alessa almost laughed, the sound catching in her throat as she turned to face him more fully. “I brought you up here for a present,” she shot back, her tone sharper than she intended. “You can take it or leave it.”
The words came out more blunt and biting than she’d meant them to be, a defense mechanism she didn’t entirely control. On the outside, she tried to maintain her composure, to keep her face neutral and unreadable, but inside, the sting of her own words hit hard. She immediately regretted the snark, felt the urge to apologize, but she bit it back, not wanting to appear weak or uncertain anymore than she already was. What a great Crow she is.
Lucanis raised an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth twitching in what could have been the beginnings of a smile. He turned to look at her, his expression caught somewhere between curiosity and caution. “A present, huh?” He tilted his head slightly, as if trying to gauge her intentions. “You went through all this trouble just to give me something?”
Alessa swallowed, feeling her resolve waver for a moment. “Yeah,” she said, her voice softer now, less defensive. “I wanted to... I thought it was about time I gave you something, that’s all.”
Lucanis’ gaze lingered on her for a moment longer before he finally nodded, his expression shifting to something more sincere, though still guarded. “Alright,” he said, taking a step closer, though still maintaining a respectful distance. “Let’s see this mysterious gift, then.”
The blonde reached into her pocket, her fingers brushing against the small, velvet-lined box. She hesitated for just a second, feeling the weight of what she was about to do settle over her like a heavy cloak. Then, with a deep breath, she pulled out the box and held it out to him.
“It’s not much,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper now. “But I thought... I thought you might like it.”
Lucanis took the box from her, his fingers brushing against hers for the briefest moment. He opened it slowly, his eyes falling on the silver feather and dagger pendant nestled inside. For a long moment, he said nothing, simply staring at the gift as if trying to understand its significance.
Finally, he looked up at her, his expression unreadable. “Alessa...”
She cut him off, feeling the need to explain before he could say anything else. “The feather, it’s a Crow’s feather. But it represents protection, freedom... and loyalty.” She paused, searching his face for any sign of what he might be thinking but his eyes shined with something she could not read. “And the dagger, well... I guess that one’s pretty self-explanatory. But it’s also... it’s a reminder of who we are. Where we come from.”
The necklace inside was meant to be a symbol of their friendship, the charms showing how she viewed him, a token…
‘Ohh, oh dear.’ The elf thought to herself as realization dawned, the words that she thought of next sounded awfully like Zevran’s all those years ago. ‘A token. Merida.’
A token of her appreciation and… affection. She had grown close, damn near as close to him as she did with Zevran during the Blight. And the thought now terrified her, good thing that when she was truly and honestly afraid she had a blank mask.
As Lucanis tucked the box into his coat, a quiet stillness settled between them, their words carrying the weight of unspoken feelings. Without realizing it, they had drawn closer, the space between them shrinking as if pulled together by an invisible thread. The cool breeze from the sea barely registered as they stood there, the world around them fading further into the background.
Lucanis glanced up from the horizon, his contemplative expression shifting as he noticed how near they had become. His eyes met Alessa’s, and for a brief moment, both of their expressions softened, a mix of surprise and something else—something unspoken that neither dared to acknowledge fully.
Alessa, feeling the sudden closeness, instinctively tensed, her heart skipping a beat. She hadn’t intended for them to be this close, hadn’t noticed the gradual steps they had taken toward each other until now. Lucanis, too, seemed to register the proximity, his slight smile fading as his gaze held hers, a flicker of uncertainty passing across his face.
Yet neither of them moved away. The closeness didn’t feel uncomfortable, but rather charged with an unfamiliar energy, a connection that seemed to deepen the longer they remained there, mere inches apart. It was as if the physical distance had mirrored the emotional one they had been slowly bridging, step by step.
But there was one thing on both of their minds that weighed heavy as the world ending bullshit… It was both of them knowing she was married to the Shadow . But, the elf loved Zevran and said how she was not interested in anyone else, permission or no.
Lucanis’ hand lingered on his coat, where he had tucked away the gift, his eyes searching Alessa’s face for a sign of what she was thinking. Alessa, in turn, found herself caught in his gaze, for a split second, it felt as though something might happen, some unspoken barrier might finally break. But then, almost in sync, they both seemed to pull back slightly, the moment passing as quickly as it had come. Lucanis gave a small, almost imperceptible nod, acknowledging the closeness without needing to comment on it, while Alessa exhaled softly, her heart still racing but her face once again composed.
“I will keep it safe,” Lucanis promised, his voice steady, as if reaffirming the unspoken understanding between them. The connection remained, but now it was laced with a subtle tension, something that neither of them seemed quite ready to address directly.
Alessa returned the nod, a faint smile tugging at her lips as she tried to regain her composure. “Good,” she murmured, the single word carrying more weight than she intended, as if she were acknowledging more than just his acceptance of the gift.
For a few moments, they stood there in silence, the awkwardness from earlier fading into something more comfortable, more familiar. The world around them still felt surreal, the edges of reality blurred by the Fade, but here, in this moment, it didn’t seem to matter as much. The silence wasn’t so much about what wasn’t being said, but about what had already been understood.
“Shall we head back?” Lucanis finally asked, his tone lighter now, as if the heaviness of the moment had passed.
Alessa nodded, a small smile finally breaking through her stoic expression. “Yeah, let’s go.”
They began the descent from the lighthouse, walking side by side. The silence between them was still present, but it was no longer awkward—it was a silence of acceptance, of understanding, a silence that spoke volumes without the need for words.
But there were most definitely words that needed to be said and feelings talked about. Just not tonight. Tonight was enough.