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2024-08-25
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2024-08-25
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2/?
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The Fangs of Feral Hearts

Chapter 2: Shadowed Affection

Summary:

Ar'ivae tries to get her head on straight and assess the cleric she rescued.

Chapter Warning: Mentions of captivity and scars and trauma responses

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text


A gentle melody hummed in Ar'ivae’s ears. She felt a gentle caress on her head soothing an ache she didn’t realize was present till the pain was eased. She whined at the touch, feeling the tug to open her eyes, but longed to remain in the nothingness she had moments before.

“So stubborn…” a gentle feminine voice cooed. Gently now petting the top of Ar'ivae’s head as if brushing a flower petal, “It’s time to wake up, young one.” Their hand veered down to the center of her forehead, tracing the mark of a crescent moon shielding a north star, sending a slight shiver to Ar'ivae. “There is much for you to do…”

Ar'ivae leaned into the gentle touch feeling a relief she couldn’t place, despite the coolness of the touch, she almost wanted to remain like this. Anything else couldn’t be worth leaving this serenity. She wasn’t sure why, but the words that danced on her tongue must have escaped from somewhere in her heart, slipping past any consciousness she retained, “Can’t we stay, Mother? This feels nice…” 

The gentle touch falters for a moment, before tucking strands of blonde hair behind Ar'ivae’s pointed ear and cupping her cheek, their thumb brushes her cheek in circles, “Oh, my sweet chosen…”, the voice whispered with pity. The words and tone slowly draw Ar'ivae’s consciousness to the surface, “Dreams may be captivating, but it is in living that we experience the real, profound wonder of life. Don’t forget that.”

“W-wait–!”, realization finally caught up to Ar'ivae.

“Wake up, little one.”

“WAIT!”

With a gasp, Ar'ivae’s blue eyes flashed open seeing a blue sky with fluttering debris in the air. She struggled to sit up as her head continued to pound as she felt something squirm within her head. And just like that, everything came back to her.
She grabbed her head feeling a headache coming on and feeling a sense of deja vu at doing this a second time within hours… or what she assumed had been hours.

Her hand traced down to the center of her forehead brushing the mark that felt as light as a kiss. She sighed at the loss of serenity as her shoulders sank in defeat, “Thanks for saying hi….” 


In some ways, feeling the goddess after almost 2 years was a welcomed moment full of longing that seemed fulfilled by her presence. Yet for Ar’ivae, that moment came with the additional reminder that she actually did meet a goddess, that this mark was hers, and she really was free because of her. 

That she was only free because of her.That everything did happen no matter how her mind tried to rationalize her captivity and sudden change to freedom.

Her scars & numbness may remind her that, ‘hey– that wasn’t a fever nightmare, you did experience that’… the realization again that she couldn’t have gotten free– that she’d still be there if not for Her … how powerless she was… made her disassociate more.

Time and reality felt like muttered whispers in the wind to her. She knew it was there and what they were, but couldn’t quite ground herself to hear & comprehend them in the moment. She knew it was 1492. She knew she was at Balders Gate– or was before the Mind Flayers. But if anyone were to ask her what day of the week it was, what the hour was, she’d blink and have to find out. Her sense of time was shot.

She once had been drawing for 20 hours, and she had just learned when the bartender approached her to ask if she wanted a meal or needed anything. After she didn’t move from that spot the entire time– she had still been there for his next shift.

She had become a pro at running on autopilot, to the point she had to focus just to break the habit– and still struggled with it after over a year. In some ways, it was nice for hunting missions. It made them go by fast, and the hunts would be quick & efficient but would be harder when she had to deal with groups. You can’t zone out when you have to communicate with others and not accidentally kill them…

She still doesn’t know how the River Rat crew put up with her, even if she worked off what she owed them. Having to call her name over & over again, till they had to touch her and she’d jump a foot away like a spooked deer. They turned it into entertainment on their behalf, betting to see if she’d respond after a certain amount of calls or if a physical touch would ground her. She at least got 5% of it for being a ‘good sport’, which helped to pay them off. If anything, it helped her practice so she couldn’t complain anyway.


Ar’ivae shook her head patting her cheeks to force her mind to focus as she rose to stand. “Let’s not go down that rabbit hole again,” She sighed finally taking in her surroundings of the river shoreline. She saw the remnants of the crash site and finally realized the amount of bodies around her. She looked down at herself, surprised at the lack of damage to her body and clothing. 

Did She save me again? While Ar’ivae is appreciative, she hates that she owes the goddess again for her life and keeps needing to be saved. At this point, just let me die and be done with it , she groaned internally at the helplessness. Feeling the worm squirm in her brain again, Ar’ivae shudders at the sensation and remembers the gith’s words about becoming Mind Flayer, about finding a cure before that happens. It's then that she realizes she momentarily forgot about the women that she met on the ship. 

 

Did they get thrown out too? She looks around and cringes at the sight of the littered bodies. Well, it looks like most of us did… Gods, I hope they were dead before the impact. Maybe I should see if there are any survivors, although I doubt She would save only a few and not all of us if that were the case…

She began checking the bodies closest to her and upon confirming their death, checked their person for anything that could be of use for her survival. Then she cast a firebolt so their ashes could spread into the wind and continue their final leg in the cycle of nature. She didn’t have the time or energy to bury so many bodies, but it was the least she could do for basically stealing from their corpses. 

As she gathered supplies along the beach shore, she paused at the glimmer of light reflecting a  little ways away. She walked closer only to realize it was armor shining in the sunlight– and it belonged to the laying form of Shadowheart.

“Oh no…” Ar’ivae approached the form solemnly, trying to push down the feeling of sorrow. “You just escaped too…” feeling a stab of remorse and frustration at her closely associated feelings towards her own damning words.

She knelt to check her pulse, only to be shocked, and elated, to feel a heartbeat! “You’re alive!” Her ears perk up with joy as she reached to rouse the half-elf with gentle, but firm shakes. “Shadowheart! Shadowheart!”

With a groan, the dark-haired half-elf opens her eyes to see Ar’ivae smiling down at her then blinks in shock. “You’re alive. I’m alive . How is this possible...?” She sat up trying to comprehend her confusion, as there was no reasonable way they would survive falling at that height.

Ar’ivae laughed, suddenly hugging the half-elf with glee. “I don’t know, but I’m not looking a gift horse in the mouth! I’m so glad you’re ok!”

Shadowheart froze at the contact, taken off guard by the elves' sudden jubilation. “I appreciate the sentiment….truly, but could you–” she tried to hint.

“Oh! Sorry!” Ar’ivae released Shadowheart so she could rise and laughed awkwardly while rubbing the back of her head. “I’ve just dealt with so many corpses in the last 30 minutes, I’m just glad the one person I recognized isn’t one of them.”

That was true, but now it bothered her. With Shadowheart being alive, that must mean that it wasn’t the goddess who halted Ar’ivae’s descent. She would have halted everyone's descent, given everyone the chance… not just her chosen- if she was going to intervene at all... so what caught them and then dropped them?

Shadowheart eyed the elf suspiciously, she hadn’t expected the clear-headed, quippy elf she met on the ship to wallow at the carnage surrounding her, and show care for a stranger she barely knew or should trust. Shadowheart laughed at the thought, knowing how hypocritical she sounded considering this person had saved her– for logical reasons or not, she didn’t have to, and Shadowheart followed her into battle regardless. Perhaps it's just that druidic nature coming out after the haze of immediate danger passed.


“So I take it you have already started to gather supplies then? Good. If we are to find a healer to escape from these monsters in our head, we’ll need shelter and any supplies we can get.” 

Ar’ivae perked up at her saying ‘we’ in shock. “‘We”, you mean it? I thought I’d scared you off with– well, with me earlier… and if not that, the hug surely,” she rambled kicking herself for not shutting up.

Shadowheart raised an eyebrow in confusion before it dawned on her, what she was inferring: when she had wild shaped into the pale Direwolf on the ship. She nearly forgot about that after just realizing she survived the crash, but the elf had seen how her form had impacted her and had taken her response to the embrace as an intentional snub.

Shadowheart huffed a chuckle at how her day was going from seeing how empathic this elf was, compared to her daring actions on the ship.

“While I appreciate the concern, your wolf form just took me by surprise. I know it’s you now, and you were kind enough to affirm with me when you did not have to. Frankly, I can’t think of better company than a sensible person such as yourself— but do warn me before any more sudden embraces,” She teased. 

 

Shadowheart swore with how wide-eyed Ar’ivae got with her perked-up elf ears and relived smile, that if she had been in her wolf form, her tail would be wagging. The mental image caused the cleric to chuckle, shaking her head before smiling and looking at the girl solemnly. “I also wanted to say thank you, again. Truly. For freeing me. It would have been all too easy for you to run right past my pod– but you didn’t. I’ll remember that.”

Ar’ivae’s eyes softened and seemed a bit distant to Shadowheart, but in a blink, it was replaced with certainty and stoicism that the cleric remembered seeing on the ship. “Of course. And thank you for trusting me further, as we’re stronger together. Now, let's see if we can survive this neck of this shit show.”

Shadowheart couldn't stifle the laugh that escaped due to her bluntness, but agreed full-heartedly, “Lead the way.”
 



The women continued searching the shoreline for any valuable items that could be sold or traded for supplies if they could find someone to barter with. Shadowheart didn’t see the point in burning the bodies, but figured it wasn’t worth arguing about as Ar’ivae was right it took less effort than to bury the dead, though she wouldn’t have bothered anywise. They had more pressing concerns.
Still, on the off chance there were any parasites alive that could escape from the bodies, that was enough to warrant for her to just firebolt, and move on.


Then just as she was glad to be away from any illithid, suddenly 5 intellect devoureres appeared to crush that perception. She readied her mace and was surprised to see that Ar’ivae pulled out dual silver blades and charged forward at the creatures. She didn’t get to see her fight with weapons till now and was impressed a druid had that level of dexterity. She managed to take out a couple of the brains, before hearing the final squeal of Ar’ivae’s last kill with a hard stab to the center of the brain.

“Thought you’d be less enthusiastic to eliminate the creatures that looked like your friend last night,” Shadowheart teased and was rewarded with a visible shiver from the druid as she cringed at the thought.

“Yeah, no. That whole situation with Us had so many red flags, that I’d rather not experience that again, “ She seethed her blades and turned to face the cleric. “Are you alright? You hesitated for a second there, were you worried about me wild shaping?” Ar’ivae asked, changing the topic.

Shadowheart blinked, once again surprised at the Druid’s perception as she swore she was in the midst of battle to notice, “I was just surprised to see you battle with silver blades. I had expected your wolf form, maybe a staff or even a bow, it is not too common for druids to wield blades, let alone silver ones.”

“Oh, yeah I guess that’s true.” Ar’ivae was taken off guard, certain that the cleric was just nervous about her wolf form, but now wished that truly was all it was.

She forced down the concern of Shadowheart asking further questions and smiled as big as she could hoping to throw her off some. “They were a gift I couldn’t turn away. It took some time to get used to them, but they’ve become an extension of my claws without my form.”

Shadowheart was oblivious to Ar’ivae’s anxiety but took the answer in stride, “I see. Good to know you’re a capable fighter no matter the form. And, I hope you know, you don’t have to worry about changing into a wolf in front of me. That wasn’t why I hesitated, just another unusual surprise to add to the growing list.”

At that, she moved forward, out of the burning ruins of the ship, leaving Ar’ivae smirking at her remaining statement.

“What, you didn’t expect to wake up on an alien ship, be infected, and start on a life-changing- harrowing journey with a random druid you met? This is an average ten-day for me,” She joked, running to catch up with the cleric and earning a dry laugh from her.

“Quips for miles, I see.” Shadowheart teased back, “Well, if you are so prepared for any potential new encounter, perhaps we have nothing to fear.”

Ar’ivae smiled, “I’ve got quips, tricks, and fangs for days to come. You have nothing to fear, m’lady.” She winked while doing a dramatic bow causing Shadowheart to snort and roll her eyes.

“Gods, barely an hour into this quest of ours and I’m wondering how I’ll survive the night with you.” Both of them laughed, and for a moment… neither of them could remember the last time they had laughed like this.

The moment was interrupted as they heard a man calling for help, just up the ridge they were traveling on. There was another survivor. 

Notes:

Hey all!

I'm gonna try to at least get to the grove as soon as possible, but I can't resist some hijinks along the way. I wasn't honestly expecting a Shadowheart chapter, more like a 'leaving the beach chapter, but that's how it came out.

I honestly wanted to tell you WHO the goddess is, but I honestly want to see if any of you can guess. it won't be a mystery for too long... but I want to see if anyone can figure it out ;)

Tell me what you think! Thanks!

Notes:

Thank you all for reading!

I'm gonna stay to the source material (somewhat) but it won't be scene for scene or every dialogue, so don't worry. Also note, if anyone is confused why Ar'ivae can transform early, she is at lvl 2 here, it will be explained later-- promise-- i'm not focusing on lvls, but just in case anyone asks.

I'll drop the next chapter as soon as I can! Thanks for coming on this adventure with us!