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Lessons in Time of COVID

Chapter 4

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“This is the worst.

Wei Ying can’t even enjoy the sourdough biscuits Nie Huaisang made. Which is ridiculous, because they’ve got caramelized onions in them, and they are so, so good.

But even though this is like peak bread, Wei Ying can’t enjoy them.

Because he misses Lan Wangji.

Two weeks have passed since Wei Ying’s final exam and he’s thought about Lan Wangji every day since. Not every single minute—he does have a job and does need sleep occasionally—but it’s close.

“It took me five hours to make these biscuits,” Nie Huaisang says, buttering one up. “Five. Hours. And all you’re doing is sitting and mooning.”

“Three of those hours is just having the dough in the fridge,” Wei Ying says, stabbing his biscuit with a butter knife. Nie Huaisang is the type of person who actually owns butter knives. He’s fancy like that. “I read the recipe.”

“Three hours of worry that something would go wrong with my sourdough child. Baking is stress,” Huaisang says. He takes a sip of beer. “Just text him. Ask him out.”

If only it was that easy. “He’s not interested in a relationship. He said so,” Wei Ying says sadly. He takes a sip of beer and pines.

If the last two weeks have taught him anything, it’s that he’s a champion piner. Olympic-worthy, even. Maybe even a medal contender.

“Okay, so what’s the worst that can happen if you text him?” Huaisang asks. “This is me asking a legitimate question here.”

Wei Ying takes a moment to think about it. While he does, he takes a bite of the biscuit, which fuck, is so good. The combination of caramelized onions and sourdough? Gonna be hard to top this one.

The problem is he doesn’t know what the worst outcome is.

Huaisang shakes his head. “Okay, so say you text him. He texts back and says he has a new student and blocks your number.” He looks at Wei Ying, like Wei Ying should be able to connect the dots. Wei Ying connects no dots. “How would that be worse than what you’re going through now? At least you’d know.”

That’s when Wei Ying’s phone beeps. He picks it up immediately, hoping to see Lan Wangji’s name across the screen. Heart thumping, he looks at his phone.

It’s a text from a number he doesn’t recognize. The message says: miss you

“Okay, your face journey is far too compelling for me to not know what’s going on,” Huaisang says. He takes the phone out of Wei Ying’s hand. “Huh. Ex-girlfriend?”

“Maybe.” Wei Ying does have the habit of getting rid of old phone numbers on a regular basis. He just doesn’t like to see mementos of the past every time he needs to look up a contact.

Which means he’s going to have to delete Lan Wangji’s contact information some day. He already hates future him for doing that. Even though it will need to be done.

He quickly blocks the number on his phone, just in case. Getting random messages from people is just something he doesn’t enjoy.

“You’re not gonna text him, are you?”

Wei Ying shakes his head. While in theory he believes that it’s better to have loved and lost, the reality is that he would rather not know than be shot down. Basically, the opposite of ‘fuck around and find out.’

He won’t fuck around and he won’t find out. It’s an absolute fool-proof plan.

“Your funeral. You still coming with me to the party next week?”

“Your brother’s new boyfriend’s birthday party,” Wei Ying says. “So you want me to go to a birthday party of a dude I’ve never met.”

Huaisang nods. “Got it in one. You’re super smart. Dude, just be my plus one for the night. I won’t even make you put out. Promise.”

Wei Ying tilts his head, considering. It would be weird, sure. But plenty of people end up with their best friend in the whole world. Maybe he and Huaisang should—

A biscuit hits Wei Ying right in the middle of his forehead. “Dude.”

“Get that look off of your face right now. It’s never gonna happen. Ever,” Huaisang says. “Picture it. Right now. Picture us kissing.”

Wei Ying tries, he honestly does. But the Wei Ying and the Huaisang in his imagination can’t even get that far. They start leaning in and dissolve into laughter every time.

It would never work. And that’s okay. It’s very much okay.

“You are wise beyond your years,” Wei Ying says, grabbing the biscuit Huaisang threw at him and tearing it open. “Now I can go back to lusting after Lan Wangji’s cock in silence.”

“It’s a very good cock, at least,” Huaisang says. “I never actually touched it in that seminar, but I got to look. And it’s oh so very pretty.”

“The prettiest,” Wei Ying says.

And before he can stop himself, Wei Ying deletes Lan Wangji’s contact information from his phone. Somehow, he’s not surprised that it hurts. But Huaisang is right. If Wei Ying isn’t brave enough to shoot his shot, he can’t stay in limbo forever.

He needs to move on. So he will.

 


 

Yeah, so this is absolutely terrifying.

Earlier tonight, Wei Ying decided to live his best life and set up a grindr profile. An actual, honest-to-goodness profile that has some of his pictures and everything.

And now he’s at a bar. Waiting for… Wei Ying checks his phone again. Rob from Andersonville. Someone he might be willing to actually take home to his apartment.

He never did this when he thought he was straight.

Wei Ying wouldn’t say it was easy to get a girlfriend back then, but it wasn’t exactly hard. He’d meet a woman, usually in some sort of group setting, get to know them a bit. Ask them out to dinner and suddenly he wasn’t single anymore.

He was able to message the dude a bit, first. They’re both looking for a relationship. And look at them. Even meeting at a bar before they might go back to his place. This is absolutely not the start to a one-night stand.

At least that’s what Wei Ying keeps telling himself.

Shit. Why does this feel so weird? And not a good weird. Wei Ying loves good weird. He was born into good weird. Molded by it.

This is not good weird. And he knows why.

Because out there somewhere is Lan Wangji and Wei Ying really wants to hold his hand and kiss him. Which, of course, is the last thing that Lan Wangji would ever want to do.

Wei Ying looks at his phone, at the grindr app. He’s not ready. Not yet. Not when his heart still beats for Lan Wangji. Rob from Andersonville could never take his place.

And it’s not fair to the guy to even try.

Wei Ying doesn’t even give himself a chance to change his mind. He messages Rob from Andersonville, tells him something came up, and leaves the bar.

 


 

“A country club? You’re taking me to an honest-to-goodness country club?”

Wei Ying looks down at his jeans. Not ripped, thankfully, and he’s actually wearing a red button-down shirt. With the arms rolled up to the elbows, naturally. He’s realizing in his old age that he’s a bit of a slut.

But even though he knows he looks good, he is not in what he would call country club attire. Then again, neither is Huaisang, so at least they can look like complete outsiders together.

“Right? Apparently the boyfriend’s uncle is a member. They rented out one of the party rooms. It’s gonna be catered and everything.”

Wei Ying lets out a low whistle. “I don’t even remember what I did for my last birthday. Never threw a party for myself.”

“The rich do things differently, my friend,” Huaisang says as they get out of the car.

“Everyone’s still gonna be masked, right?”

“They’re rich, not stupid, Nie Huaisang says with a scoff, putting on his own mask.

It’s a nice-looking country club. Not that Wei Ying has a lot of country club experience in which to compare. But it doesn’t look too obnoxious, even being out in the suburbs. At least it’s one of the suburbs that like to pretend they’re Chicago, too, simply because they border the city. Not like, Naperville, or something.

They start walking towards the entrance and Wei Ying suddenly has an uncomfortable thought. “Hey, is this weird? Me going to your brother’s boyfriend’s birthday party. The same brother who I slept with once?”

Huaisang shrugs. “It was only once, right?” Wei Ying nods and Huaisang breaks out into a grin, slapping his shoulder. “You are now officially queer, my friend. Everything has led to this moment.”

Wei Ying can only shake his head. It’s not like the boyfriend knows that he and Nie Mingjue hooked up once, right? At least, Wei Ying really, really hopes not.

The main foyer has one of those banquet signs, like it’s directing people towards a wedding reception. Wei Ying reads it quick. “Lan Huan Celebration - Meadow Terrace.”

“Lan Huan?” Wei Ying asks quietly.

“Ah, yeah, I think that’s his name..”

He wonders if there’s any chance that Lan Huan is related to Lan Wangji. Or… for one horrible moment, Wei Ying wonders if Lan Huan might actually be Lan Wangji. Wei Ying is almost positive that Lan Wangji is not his actual name.

But then he remembers that Nie Mingjue has been dating this guy for awhile and it’s only been three weeks—and one failed grindr hookup—since Wei Ying stopped taking lessons.

So it can’t be the same person. But what if it’s a relative? A close relative would totally be at a birthday party like this.

Wei Ying decides to internally panic for a moment and then stops. So what if Lan Wangji is there? It’s not like it’s going to change anything. Wei Ying still isn’t going to do anything about it, because he’s a coward.

With that in mind, Wei Ying grabs Huaisang’s arm for moral support as they walk onto the terrace. Thankfully the weather is nice enough to host the party outside. A few people aren’t wearing masks, but most are.

Nie Mingjue is standing near the back of the party terrace, standing next to—

Wei Ying’s heart starts racing. Could it actually be—

A step closer makes him realize that no. No, that’s not Lan Wangji. But someone who looks damn similar. The dude smiles far too much, though. Even wearing a mask, Wei Ying can tell the dude is smiling. Must be a relative. Which means maybe, just maybe, Lan Wangji is here.

Would be nice just to see him again, just to remember that he actually exists.

“Nie Huaisang, it’s wonderful to see you again. Welcome!” the non-Lan Wangji says. “And you brought a plus-one. Delightful.”

“This is Wei Ying,” Nie Huaisang says. He nudges Wei Ying’s shoulder. “This is Lan Huan.”

“An absolute pleasure to make your acquaintance, Wei Ying. I’m sure you’ll understand if we don’t shake hands,” Lan Huan says, his smile reaching his eyes.

Wei Ying blinks. Not many people can get away with that sort of introduction and actually seem sincere. But Lan Huan absolutely does.

“Happy Birthday,” Wei Ying says.

Lan Huan smiles again. “I normally prefer not to make a fuss, but now that so many are vaccinated and are taking the proper precautions, I thought a bit of a celebration was in order. So why not throw a party for my birthday?”

Nie Mingjue simply beams next to Lan Huan and wow. Is he smitten. Good for him.

“Nie Huaisang, I can’t remember. Did you get a chance to meet my brother when we went to the Lyric Opera last week?” Lan Huan asks. He turns towards a table, where one person is sitting, clearly watching the group.

Wei Ying’s heart skips a beat. Well, it tries to. It’s Lan Wangji. It’s actually Lan Wangji.

Huaisang raises his hand. “We met. Good to see you again, Lan Zhan.”

Lan Zhan. Lan Zhan. An actual name! Wei Ying could say that name over and over again. It’s a great name. A perfect name. A name that Wei Ying wants to feel on his tongue.

“This is Wei Ying,” Huaisang says. And only because Wei Ying knows him so well, can he hear the absolute shit-eating grin in Huaisang’s voice. The fucker. Lan Zhan nods and looks down at the table he’s sitting at. “I met Lan Zhan last week. He was just named the assistant concertmaster of the Lyric Opera Orchestra.”

Which is a big fucking deal. “That’s awesome.”

And Wei Ying means it. Lan Zhan—and wow that’s gonna take some getting used to—deserves every good thing. 

Lan Huan puts his hand on Lan Zhan’s shoulder. “We’re all very proud of him.”

That’s when it really hits Wei Ying that of this small group of five people, the amount of cock sucking that has happened between them all is a bit ridiculous. Wei Ying would need charts. Maybe spreadsheets to keep track.

He loves being queer.

“I see my uncle waving us over. Lan Zhan, let’s go see what he wants. Will you join us, A-jue?”

“I need a quick word with Wei Ying and my brother,” Nie Mingjue says, slapping Wei Ying on the shoulder. “I’ll catch up.”

Whelp. Okay. Can this be anymore awkward? Yeah, why did he let that thought pass through his brain? It can always get more awkward.

The moment they’re out of earshot from the rest of the group, Nie Mingjue stares down at Wei Ying and Huaisang. He’s only maybe two inches taller than Wei Ying, so it shouldn’t be all that intimidating.

But it absolutely fucking is.

“Here’s the deal, you two. Lan Huan has absolutely no idea what his brother teaches on the side. It’s gonna stay that way.” Nie Mingjue’s face is pretty menacing. “Understood?”

“Yeah, not exactly a normal topic of conversation, ge. Pretty sure neither of us even thought of it until you brought it up,” Huaisang says, tapping Nie Mingjue on the chest. Which might be true for Huaisang but was absolutely not true for Wei Ying. “We’ll be good. Promise.”

“You promise, too?” Nie Mingjue asks Wei Ying.

“Fuck, yes. I’ll pinkie swear right now if you need me to.”

“I just… I don’t want to mess this up,” Nie Mingjue says, rubbing his eyes. “And I can’t think of anything worse than ‘your brother showed me those moves you like so much.’”

“Yeah, there would be no coming back from that,” Huaisang says. “Ge. We got you.”

Wei Ying can only nod in agreement. And then the squirrels in his head find a nut and try to share it with him. Nie Mingjue has something to lose. Someone he cares about and doesn’t want to see hurt.

And Wei Ying can’t even find the courage to take a chance and ask Lan Wangji—Lan Zhan—out on a date. When he literally has nothing to lose but some hurt feelings.

He takes a breathe. “Excuse me,” Wei Ying says. “I need to talk to someone.”

“Oh shit,” Huaisang whispers as Wei Ying turns and looks for Lan Zhan. “Get it, Wei Ying.”

“You did this on purpose, didn’t you? A little warning would be nice.”

“And miss potential drama? It’s like you don’t know me at all, Wei Ying. We used to be so close.”

“Oh fuck you,” Wei Ying says with a grin.

Huaisang purposely turns to his brother, but not before flicking Wei Ying away with his fingers.

Right. Time to do the scariest thing he’s ever done in his life.

Lan Zhan is sitting down at a grand piano under a terrace. There’s music playing in the background, some sort of retro ‘90s pop, so if he’s actually playing, Wei Ying can’t hear him.

All he hopes for is a little casual conversation. They are in public, after all. And Wei Ying really doesn’t want to get the shit beat out of him by Nie Mingjue by bringing up anything related to Lan Zhan’s after-hours activities.

“Hey,” Wei Ying says as he walks up to the piano. Because he is nothing if not original.

Fuck, Lan Zhan is beautiful. He’s wearing the same boring office clothes that Wei Ying has seen on the floor of his apartment plenty of times. Dark grey slacks and a light blue button down. And unlike Wei Ying, who is scandalizing the room with his forearms, Lan Zhan’s sleeves aren’t rolled up. Probably because he is an adult.

Lan Zhan glances up, makes eye contact for approximately 1.2 seconds, then stares back down at the piano keys.

Well, this certainly isn’t the reunion that Wei Ying hoped. He looks around, trying to see if anyone is close enough to overhear them. Not that Wei Ying plans on talking dirty or anything. Not unless he thinks Lan Zhan wants him to.

“You play?” Wei Ying asks and because he is the bravest person in the history of the world, he sits down on the very edge of the piano bench, right next to Lan Zhan. Close enough that their thighs are touching.

Lan Zhan nods.

An awkward silence falls between them and Wei Ying starts to panic. Not externally. Externally, he’s pretty sure he looks completely normal. But on the inside?

In all their lessons, Wei Ying can’t remember one awkward silence. Oh there were silences. Lan Zhan isn’t much of a talker and even Wei Ying needs a break from a constant stream of talking. Especially if his mouth was busy doing other things.

But awkward?

Shit.

Both of them are wearing masks, so Wei Ying can’t even tell if Lan Zhan is doing his smiley at-bitch face or his serious at-bitch face. There’s a difference. And Wei Ying was very proud when he figured that out all those weeks ago.

Why can’t he think of anything to say? How is this even possible? Wei Ying always thinks of things to say. It’s who he is. It’s what he does. The only thing he can think of is that his brain is working overtime, so he does the smart thing. He turns off his brain.

And his brain instantly becomes his enemy.

“You know, I think I need a refresher course,” Wei Ying says, his mouth going a mile a minute. “It’s been, what, three weeks since my last lesson and I think I’ve forgotten everything since then.”

Of all the reactions Wei Ying could have hoped for, Lan Zhan closing his eyes in what looks like actual pain and then looking away, does not make the top ten. Not even the top one hundred.

Granted, that’s because Wei Ying is an idiot. Does he start with how much he misses Lan Zhan as a person? No. Or how much he enjoyed them just spending time together? Of course not. He goes straight for the cock.

Because he an idiot.

“I can’t,” Lan Zhan says in a low voice.

“Oh,” Wei Ying says. Because of course. Why would he ever expect anything else? He goes for a hail mary, which is apparently some sort of sports metaphor he doesn’t quite understand, but it sounds good in his head. “You probably have another student already.”

“I don’t.”

A punch in the gut would be less painful. If there was every a perfect time for either aliens to invade or for the floor to swallow him whole, it would be right now. Because nothing worse can happen. Lan Zhan simply isn’t interested. Why would he be?

“Right. I guess. I thought… I mean, I hoped—“

“Are you not here with someone? Unless you’re looking for a couple’s class?”

One of the squirrels in Wei Ying’s brain decides to flip a switch, which turns his brain back on. Slowly. “With Nie Huaisang? Oh fuck no. He and I have been best friends since high school. Go Blue Demons.”

Understandably, Lan Zhan looks slightly confused, as Wei Ying is the master of the tangent. “Blue Demons?”

“I went to Maine West. Let me guess. Lane Tech?”

“Chicago High School for the Arts.”

“Do they even have a mascot?” Wei Ying asks, looking down at the keyboard. “Wait. That doesn’t matter. Unless it’s a funny mascot like the Trash Pandas or something. Then it absolutely matters.” He takes a breath and forces himself to look at Lan Zhan. “I’m not with anyone.”

“No?”

“I’m just here for moral support. I’m not dating anyone,” Wei Ying says. His heart decides to swan dive off a cliff. He puts his hand on top of Lan Zhan’s, whose fingers are spread out over an octave. “But I’d like to be.”

Even with a mask, Wei Ying can see the soft smile reaching Lan Zhan’s eyes. Looks like he’s decided to catch Wei Ying’s heart. Which, is probably for a the best. Wei Ying really didn’t want to see his heart splattered on the ground.

“May we go somewhere more private?” Lan Zhan asks, keeping very, very still. Like he’s afraid one move will scare Wei Ying off. Well, joke’s on him. If Lan Zhan is saying what Wei Ying’s thinks he’s saying, there’s no getting rid of him now. Wei Ying’s gonna barnacle him up.

“Yes. Absolutely. Now? Now works.”

Lan Zhan stands up and Wei Ying can only follow. They leave the pavilion into a banquet room. Then Lan Zhan brings him through a side door, a service door, most likely, which leads into a deserted hallway. The walls are an ugly brown with old industrial carpet. Nothing like the lavish and classy banquet hall they just came from. Not exactly the ideal place for a confession, but it’ll do.

They stand next to each other, chests almost touching. “Are you comfortable going maskless? I’ve been careful these past few weeks,” he asks, because as much as Wei Ying wants to kiss Lan Zhan, he’ll wait two weeks of essentially quarantine if he has to.

“I am,” Lan Zhan says, taking off his mask. “With you. Not with the rest of the crowd.”

Timr to rip off the band-aid.

“So I know you said you’re not interested in dating but, Lan Zhan—“ Wei Ying stops. “That’s the first time I’ve said your actual name out loud. I like it a lot. Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan.”

The tips of Lan Zhan’s ears are beet red and it’s absolutely adorable. Which gives Wei Ying the fuel he needs to keep going. “Don’t get me wrong. Lan Wangji is pretty cool, too. Especially love the idea of a sexy secret identity. But I like saying Lan Zhan.”

Lan Zhan reaches out and strokes Wei Ying’s cheek with his knuckle. “I like you saying it.”

“Right. Totally getting off track here. Go figure. That’s the point. I like it. I like you,” Wei Ying says. “And I know that sounds like I’m in middle school but I don’t care. I like you, like you, Lan Zhan. You. Not just…” Wei Ying looks around. Even though there’s no one around, they’re still in a fancy country club. “Well, you know.”

“I wasn’t interested in a relationship,” Lan Zhan says. Wei Ying, by means of his job, knows that words matter. And the key word here is was. That was is gonna change their lives. “But I am finding that my feelings have changed in the matter.”

Wei Ying slumps against the wall in relief. All he wants in life right now is to kiss Lan Zhan. But in case that’s still off-limits, he holds out his fist. “Go us. Talking about feelings. Huaisang was fucking right.”

Lan Zhan raises an eyebrow as he bumps Wei Ying’s fist with his own. “A fist bump?”

“Hey, I’m respecting your boundaries. Does that mean kissing might be on the table?” Wei Ying asks, trying not to sound too hopeful. He’s dreamed for months about kissing Lan Zhan. Honestly, probably since the moment they met.

“I work six days a week and many evenings,” Lan Zhan says. “I have friends who say it is hard to be with a professional musician—“

“We’ll make it work. Of course we’ll make it work.” Wei Ying decides to fire up his two remaining brain cells. “Do you not want to kiss? Because that’s okay if you don’t. I don’t ever want to pressure you to do something you don’t want to do.”

It’s almost charming, the idea. That kissing might be too much even when Lan Zhan has had his tongue in Wei Ying’s ass and licked his cock like a candy cane.

Lan Zhan looks down at the floor. “I haven’t kissed anyone in a very long time. The same person who critiqued my oral skills also said I was the worst-kisser in the world.”

His voice is soft and Wei Ying can hear the hurt in the words. There’s a story there. Why Lan Zhan would go out of his way to became a champion at giving head but refuse to kiss anyone else. Some day, Wei Ying hopes to hear it.

“Then there’s nowhere to go but up. Even if what the dude says it true, and I am ninety-nine point nine nine percent sure that it’s not, it’ll only be one kiss that’s that bad. Cause you’ll get better each time. Especially if you practice.”

This makes Lan Zhan crack the softest of smiles. “I am very diligent in matters that are important to me.” Wei Ying can only close his eyes as Lan Zhan cups his cheek. “Kissing you would certainly be one of them.”

That’s when it truly hits Wei Ying that this is happening. He and Lan Zhan like each other. He wants to run around with the Rocky theme song blaring. He wants to bake a sourdough that would outshine anything Huaisang has ever made. But what he really wants…

“May I kiss you?” Wei Ying asks. Because he is nothing if not a gentleman. Until Lan Zhan doesn’t want him to be, at least. Which hopefully will be quite soon.

“Yes,” Lan Zhan says, leaning forward.

Their lips brush together. Softly. Just a light pressure. More ‘getting to know you’ than actual intent. If Lan Zhan hasn’t been kissed since college, Wei Ying doesn’t want to rush him at all. So he’ll take this slow.

Wei Ying tilts his head, ignoring how their noses bump slightly as he does. He opens his mouth, just slightly, no tongue yet, because he is gonna take this kiss slow if it kills him. Lan Zhan’s lips are soft, of course they’re soft. Wei Ying bets in all the multi-verse, there’s not a version of Lan Zhan out there that has non-perfect lips.

Wanting to deepen the kiss, just a bit, Wei Ying leans into Lan Zhan. Lan Zhan is just a tiny bit taller than him, so Wei Ying raises his arms and wraps them around his shoulders, very aware that Lan Zhan’s hands are on his hips.

They kiss softly for a while, and spoiler alert, it is not the world’s worst kiss. Even without tongue, it’s one of the better kisses that Wei Ying has ever had. He takes one hand and strokes Lan Zhan’s cheek as they continue to trade kisses.

Then Wei Ying feels the tiniest swipe of a tongue on his lips. “Fuck, yes,” he whispers as Lan Zhan’s tongue gets involved in the kiss. The kisses become sloppy as they trade who’s tongue explores who’s mouth.

Wei Ying can’t help but moan as Lan Zhan pushes him back up against the wall, leaning his weight against him. Pressed up together, Wei Ying can feel the length of Lan Zhan’s hard cock against his hips. And Wei Ying has no doubt that Lan Zhan can feel his own boner. Because Wei Ying doesn’t think he’s ever been this hard before. And it’s just from kissing.

If Lan Zhan fucks him, it might actually kill him. But what a way to go.

“We’re in a country club,” Wei Ying mutters before sucking on Lan Zhan’s bottom lip. “Pretty sure this is against the rules.”

Lan Zhan ups the ante and captures Wei Ying’s lower lip between his teeth. Yes, please. That’s always a move Wei Ying’s enjoyed. “I don’t…” Lan Zhan suddenly pulls away and straightens up.

Well, damn. Somehow Wei Ying managed to thoroughly ruin the mood. Shows you who the world’s worst kisser is and apparently it’s Wei Ying.

“Apologies,” Lan Zhan says. He cups Wei Ying’s face with his hands and kisses him softly. “I lost myself.” He looks over at the door that leads back to the banquet hall. “I will probably be missed soon.”

Wei Ying locks his hands behind Lan Zhan’s neck and sways a bit. “Can I come home with you after the party? Huaisang won’t mind.”

“I have a rehearsal tonight that I cannot miss,” Lan Zhan says. Well, pouts more like it. That is a dangerous, dangerous pout. That is a weaponized pout.

“Our lessons were always on Mondays. Tomorrow night, then?”

Lan Zhan nods. “That would be most agreeable,” he says. Wei Ying can only smile that that. Agreeable. Lan Zhan talks like an old man and Wei Ying loves it. “May I give you my phone number? The number we used to text before is for clients only.”

Wei Ying ponders that for a moment. Will Lan Zhan still want to give lessons? Perhaps they can talk about that. But not now. That’s a conversation for later. “Sure. Do you need my number, too?”

The tips of Lan Zhan’s ears turn even redder. “I already have your phone number in my phone.”

He takes out his phone and Wei Ying watches him go through his contacts. And there is Wei Ying’s name, just out there for the world to see. Lan Zhan presses the call button and Wei Ying waits for the familiar vibrate so he can add him right back into his contacts.

Nothing happens.

Wei Ying grabs his phone from his back pocket. There’s no missed call. “Is there crappy reception…” He presses a few buttons. “Lan Zhan, why are you on my blocked list?”

That’s when he remembers. “You texted me. You totally texted me. You sent me a message that said ‘missed you.’”

Lan Zhan closes his eyes. “I was intoxicated,” he says slowly. “I should not have sent a message.”

There’s only one response to that. Wei Ying fists Lan Zhan’s button-down and kisses him gently. Oh, he could kiss Lan Zhan forever. The kiss is light and sweet and Wei Ying doesn’t want it to end.

But end it does. “I’m glad you did,” Wei Ying says. Because it’s true. It’s proof! Wei Ying’s crush isn’t one-sided. He has a drunk text to prove it. He might print it out and frame it. So whenever the doubts appear—and they will, his name is Wei Ying—he can simply look at the picture and remember that Lan Zhan drunk texted him.

“We should return to the party,” Lan Zhan says. Wei Ying grins, because he can tell by Lan Zhan’s voice that he absolutely doesn’t want to. “We should.”

“I’ll have you know I’m being very adult about this,” Wei Ying says, taking a few steps towards the door. “All I want to do is basically jump around and shout from the roof top.”

“No one is stopping you.”

“Yeah, but your family is here. I should trying to make a decent impression,” Wei Ying says. And then his mouth continues to talk without his brain’s permission. “Cause I plan on sticking around for a very long time. I will will ease them all into the good weird which is me. Let them build up a tolerance first.”

Lan Zhan stops just before opening the door which will lead them out of this brown monstrosity. Which, Wei Ying shouldn’t criticize. This drab palace is where he kissed Lan Zhan for the first time. Therefore, it’s perfect.

“No one needs to build up a tolerance for you, Wei Ying. You are perfect as you are.”

Wei Ying swallows, his mouth suddenly dry. Lan Zhan says those words like he actually means them. It’s… a lot to take in.

So he does the only thing that makes sense and kisses Lan Zhan. Almost shyly. Which is something Wei Ying is not.

“You are so getting laid tomorrow night.”

“I look forward to it.”

They rejoin the party and Wei Ying can’t keep the smile off his face.

 


 

They text all throughout Monday. Wei Ying’s not even sure how he gets any work done. He supposes he did, because no one yelled at him. And, well, the company twitter feed showed a number of tweets ragging some furniture stores about their Halloween decor. Seriously. He has the best job.

And then it’s time to head over to Lan Zhan’s. Wei Ying decides to splurge and get a rideshare, because even though neither one of them mentioned it, he’s hoping beyond hope that he’ll stay the night. He even has a backpack with him. Just in case. Nothing that looks too ‘Let me stay the night. Please.

It’s been a long time since he shared a bed with someone. Honestly? Sometimes he liked that part better than sex. The moments after. Those are moment he and Lan Zhan really haven’t had, not with their lessons.

Wei Ying does a quick check and decides he’s as ready as he can be. He’s wearing his sluttiest jeans—the one with a hole mid-thigh—and a red t-shirt. One that might be just the slightest bit small on him.

A mint and a rideshare later, Wei Ying is standing in front of Lan Zhan’s apartment. He uses the code to let himself through the gate and texts Lan Zhan to buzz him up.

The squirrels in Wei Ying’s brain have decided to start playing tag. Which is really not appreciated. One day, he’s going to actually give names to the individual squirrels and start calling them out. Send them to their room. Revoke their screen time. Start treating them like the overactive children they are.

But that’s a long-term project that should probably be done under supervisor of a professional and not tonight.

The door buzzes.

Wei Ying gulps and takes a deep breath, all the way down to his toes. He’s about to see Lan Zhan. After more than an agonizing twenty-four hours, he and Lan Zhan will be in the same room again. He takes the stairs two at a time because patience is overrated. The door to Lan Zhan’s studio is open and Wei Ying walks right in, like he owns the place.

And there’s Lan Zhan. Standing right next to the shoe mat.

“Hi,” Wei Ying says. He realizes there’s probably the stupidest grin on his face right now but he doesn’t care. Lan Zhan likes him.

“It is good to see you,” Lan Zhan says because that’s Lan Zhan speak for ‘hello.’

Wei Ying slips off his shoes (yeah, he wore shoes without laces on purpose. He’s smart.) and leaves his mask on the hook. Another deep breath, and he reaches out for Lan Zhan, greeting him with a kiss.

A long kiss.

With tongue.

And you know what? Wei Ying doesn’t have the rose-colored glasses he was wearing yesterday. It’s not the greatest kiss. However. Not the worst by any means. He has absolutely had worst kisses in his life. But there is room for improvement.

Wei Ying can’t wait to improve their kisses.

“Shall we?” Wei Ying looks deliberately over at the sofa. He totally wants to go to the bed, but baby steps. The last thing he wants is to look too greedy. At least, that’s what the squirrels are telling him. “I really just want to make out with you a bit. I’ve wanted that forever.”

“We’ve only known each other since May,” Lan Zhan says. But he says it with his eyes slightly hooded and his lips red from kissing.

“Exactly. Forever,” Wei Ying says, grabbing Lan Zhan by the hand. He will be the change he wants to see in the world. Which in this case, is him sitting on Lan Zhan’s lap. “Come on. Chop chop.”

“I am a vegetarian,” Lan Zhan says.

Which, let’s be real. Is just about the best comeback anyone could ever have to the phrase ‘chop chop.’ Which explains why Wei Ying starts laughing so hard he needs to bend over and hold his side.

Lan Zhan looks quite pleased with himself. As he rightfully should. “You are amazing,” Wei Ying says, bringing Lan Zhan in for another kiss. A sort of breathless one cause Wei Ying is still laughing a bit. Because that was fucking funny! They may never make the couch at this point, but in the end, does it really matter?

However, Lan Zhan seems to have different ideas. He breaks off the kiss and practically pulls Wei Ying to the couch. Next thing Wei Ying knows, he’s straddling Lan Zhan’s thighs. Jackpot.

“Hey,” Wei Ying say, keeping his voice low, now that he’s no longer busting a gut. He brushes his lips against Lan Zhan’s jaw, wanting to see his response.

Wei Ying can’t wait to learn all of Lan Zhan’s secrets. All of them. The ones his body has, to the ones in his mind. He wants them all. And hope that Lan Zhan will want Wei Ying’s secrets in return. Even the ones that…

And Wei Ying is getting far too philosophical for a Monday night makeout session. So he concentrates on Lan Zhan.

Their kisses aren’t frantic. They’re slow. Thorough. Wei Ying almost feels like he’s being taken apart. After so many weeks of blowjobs, just their tongues gliding together feels more intimate than sex.

Which is probably something they should discuss. Cause Wei Ying kinda sorta really wants to get laid tonight.

“Hey, do you remember what you told me?” Wei Ying says, kissing Lan Zhan’s neck. “You told me that my first time with penetration should be with someone I trust. Someone I care about.” Wei Ying leans back slightly, so their chests aren’t pressed together any longer. He points right at Lan Zhan. “Guess what, that’s you.”

Lan Zhan visibly swallows, which Wei Ying really hopes means that he’s considering it. Cause. Yeah. Wei Ying wants to be fucked. And he wants Lan Zhan to be the one who fucks him.

“I mean, if that’s something you’re into. If you’re not, we can totally fall back on blowjobs. Because I happen to have it on good authority that I give good head.”

Wei Ying really hopes Lan Zhan throws him a bone soon because he is about two seconds away from babbling like an idiot. Well, babbling even more like an idiot.

“I would very much like to fuck you,” Lan Zhan says. Which. Which. Apparently Wei Ying’s got a thing for Lan Zhan saying the word fuck. Cause that was fucking hot. “Shall we move to the bed?”

There’s no time to waste. Wei Ying jumps up off of Lan Zhan, ignoring his very inconvenient boner. Well, not inconvenient in general. Cause he likes boners. And he’s pretty sure that Lan Zhan likes his boner, too! But it does make getting undressed a little more difficult. And that’s exactly what Wei Ying wants. To get naked and kiss Lan Zhan.

Apparently he and Lan Zhan are in one mind tonight, because they both start undressing themselves as they head towards the bed. And yes. Wei Ying has to do the awkward taking off jeans with a boner dance. But so does Lan Zhan, but with khakis, so Wei Ying wins.

Surprising no one, Lan Zhan has an amazing looking bed. Well, the bed itself is unimpressive. Just a black metal frame. But the pillows and duvets and everything on the bed? It’s like a cloud. A big, fluffy cloud that Wei Ying can’t wait to get lost in.

“This is a ‘no outside clothes’ bed, isn’t it?” Wei Ying asks as he flops down on the bed.

Lan Zhan does not flop, but he gets onto the bed almost as quickly. “Wear jeans on this bed at your peril.”

He sounds a little mean, and Wei Ying’s dick is remembering that he really likes a little mean. Basically, Wei Ying is just really hard, his cock jutting up, brushing his stomach.

And then Lan Zhan lays down on top of him.

Oh, yes. This is something that wasn’t covered in Blowjob U. Skin to skin contact like this? When Wei Ying can feel the solid weight of Lan Zhan covering him like the world’s best weighted blanket?

Wei Ying runs his fingers through Lan Zhan’s hair, just because he can. His hair is soft. Silky. Absolutely beautiful. Just like the rest of him.

They’re still kissing, and Lan Zhan is a freaking prodigy, apparently, because all of Wei Ying’s previous notes—involving a bit too much tongue—are gone. The kisses are good.

Lan Zhan starts kissing his neck, which Wei Ying is absolutely here for. “I would like to make you come.” He wraps his fingers around Wei Ying’s cock. “To help you relax,” he answers to Wei Ying’s unasked question. “Then immediately start opening you up. Is this acceptable to you?”

“Yes?” Wei Ying says in basically a squeak. Because yeah, that sounds good. That sounds very, very good.

“Not in the form of a question, Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan says, taking Wei Ying’s earlobe between his teeth.

Consent. Fuck. That’s hot. That’s really, really hot. “Yes,” Wei Ying says, not a squeak in sight. “Absolutely fucking yes.” Then he remembers his manners. “And you’re good with this plan, too?”

Because consent goes both ways. Hell, yeah. They’re being sexually responsible adults. Wei Ying loves that for them.

“Yes. I would not have suggested it otherwise.”

Lan Zhan strokes Wei Ying’s cock. Just once. Just enough to tease. It’s a little dry, but honestly, Wei Ying is turned on enough that he doesn’t really care. He’s ready for a good ol’ fashioned handjob.

Except Lan Zhan apparently reads minds and grabs the lube that’s conveniently on his nightstand. A quick dab in his palm and Lan Zhan’s hand goes right back, fisting Wei Ying’s cock.

They’re kissing as Lan Zhan jerks him off and the sensible part of Wei Ying’s brain, which granted is sailing out into the West, thinks that it can’t be a very comfortable position for Lan Zhan. That being said, Lan Zhan doesn’t seem to have any complaints, so Wei Ying tries to compensate with kisses.

“A little tighter,” he mutters between kisses. Wei Ying tends to jerk off like his house is on fire and wouldn’t mind Lan Zhan recreating that at all.

Lan Zhan squeezes, so it’s almost too tight, and actually it’s fucking perfect. Wei Ying is gonna lose his damn mind and it’s all Lan Zhan’s fault. Each stroke seems deliberate, like the end goal is to make Wei Ying fall apart and it’s absolutely working.

He’s not able to even give any sort of warning before he starts coming. And fuck, it feels so good, just absolutely right with Lan Zhan’s still stroking him through it, telling him that he’s a good boy.

Damn right, he’s a good boy.

Wei Ying is just about to tell Lan Zhan that when he feels the cold brush of Lan Zhan’s lubed-up finger at his entrance.

“Yes?” Lan Zhan asks.

“Fuck, yes,” Wei Ying says, spreading his legs apart. He feels a little wanton. A little sluttish, more like. Okay, a lot sluttish. If Wei Ying could spend the rest of his life right here in this bed, made for Lan Zhan’s pleasure, he probably would.

He can work remote. Wei Ying has no doubt in his ability to multi-task. Keep up his career running an award-winning social media account and be Lan Zhan’s personal fuck toy?

Wei Ying contains multitudes.

Lan Zhan starts out only with one fingers. A little different from the small ass-only dildo that Wei Ying’s experimented with over the past few months, but a good different. Because it’s Lan Zhan.

“Wei Ying?”

“Yeah?” Wei Ying says, trying not to sound completely breathless from having Lan Zhan’s finger up his ass. “Got something to—“

That’s when Lan Zhan changes position and his finger brushes right there.

“Oh, fuck, Lan Zhan. Shit, seriously?” Wei Ying says as Lan Zhan presses against his prostate. He might have just come, but his cock is seriously in contention for ‘comeback of the year.’

“Yes, seriously,” Lan Zhan says. And that’s when he adds a second finger.

Wei Ying can only try to breathe in and out, trying to keep himself relaxed as Lan Zhan fucks him with his fingers. It’s just… It feels so good. So much better than a dildo, that Wei Ying can’t even imagine what it’s going to be like with Lan Zhan’s actually cock.

Which, as previously established, is basically the most beautiful cock in all of existence. And soon that cock will be fucking Wei Ying’s ass.

He is the luckiest person alive. Ever.

“You are still okay without using a condom?” Lan Zhan asks quietly. “I have some, if you would prefer us to use them.”

That’s one of the things they texted about earlier in the day. Since neither one of them have been with anyone else since they lessons stopped, they know they’re both clean. Wei Ying brought the idea up first, and somehow managed to keep a straight face in a business sales meeting, as he and Lan Zhan texted about the pros and cons of condom use.

Considering the one pro seemed to be ‘easier clean-up?’ Wei Ying was all for no condoms. He already is mess incarnate. His sex life might as well be a reflection of that.

“Oh hell yeah,” Wei Ying says with a nod, so that there can be no misunderstand just how enthusiastically he is consenting. “It’s go time.”

Which is when Wei Ying realizes he doesn’t really know what position is best for this. There’s the obvious doggy-style, but that isn’t quite what he wants. Not with his first time with penetration. Well, Wei Ying getting penetrated.

“Can we fuck face-to-face?” Wei Ying asks, amazed that his voice almost sounds shy.

Lan Zhan’s face softens, and he takes his non-lubed hand and places it on Wei Ying’s cheek. It’s… Well, it’s a lot. Being this close to Lan Zhan and knowing that very soon, his cock is gonna be inside him.

“I would like to see you as well,” Lan Zhan says softly.

Wei Ying can’t handle this. Can’t handle the tenderness in which Lan Zhan looks at him. It’s ridiculous and perfect and he feels cherished. Even as they work to get into position together, that look doesn’t leave Lan Zhan’s face.

For once, Wei Ying is incredibly grateful for the once-a-month yoga sessions he does with Yanli. Because he’s pretty sure it’s only thanks to them that he’s able to bend in half like he is, leg spread, his knees draped over the crook of Lan Zhan’s elbows.

Lan Zhan is sitting back on his heels, looking absolutely glorious. The cherished look is gone, replaced by pure concentration as his cock brushes Wei Ying’s hole.

“Breathe, Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan says, more like a command than anything else. “Look at me and breathe.”

That, Wei Ying can do. He likes looking at Lan Zhan. And he likes breathing. Win win!

Lan Zhan lets out a slight grunt, and just like that, there’s a cock in Wei Ying’s ass.

There’s a bit of pain, sure. But not a bad pain in the slightest. And even if it was? Totally worth it to be this close to Lan Zhan. The pain starts to change pretty quickly though.

“Oh, this is so much better than a dildo,” Wei Ying says. He does that AND breathe. He is the champion of multi-tasking. Lan Zhan is kneeling there, his eyes closed tight. While Wei Ying does appreciate the chance to get used to this sensation, he wants to be fucked within an inch of his life more. “Are you… Are you going to move?”

“Are you ready?”

“Pretty sure everything I’ve ever done has led me to this moment, so fuck yeah,” Wei Ying says. “Show me how good you can fuck me.”

Lan Zhan’s eyes open in an instant. He grips Wei Ying’s hips—tight enough Wei Ying hopes he leaves bruises—and starts to thrust.

Slow, at first. Wei Ying can tell Lan Zhan is doing a bit of ‘handle with care’ right now. Which, sure, okay. Wei Ying closes his eyes, trying to get used to the feeling. He feels full. And the glide of Lan Zhan’s cock is so, so good.

And now Wei Ying wants more.

“You can fuck harder than that, right?”

Lan Zhan leans forward and Wei Ying takes the chance to crank his neck so that they can kiss. Or at least press their lips together. It’s all he wants right now, especially once Lan Zhan seems to prove to Wei Ying that he can, indeed, fuck harder.

All Wei Ying can do is try to hold on. Lan Zhan is keeping his hips in a steady rhythm as his hands start to roam Wei Ying’s body. Hands on his thighs, his chest, even his arms. Just not the one place Wei Ying wants.

Because Wei Ying is fully hard again and if there’s anything he wants out of life right now—well, besides crafting the perfect response to troll Pottery Barn—is to come while Lan Zhan is inside him.

Inside him. Somehow, Wei Ying’s just never truly appreciated just how intimate sex can be. He does now, though. And the way Lan Zhan is fucking him right now is everything.

“Hey Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying says, looking down at his cock. He’s so hard and he feels so good with Lan Zhan fucking him, but he thinks he can feel even better. “Touch me?”

Lan Zhan’s rhythm doesn’t falter for a second. Must be one of the perks of dating a musician. His hand wraps tight around Wei Ying’s cock. He doesn’t even need to stroke. Just the way Lan Zhan is thrusting into him does enough of the work.

It’s a lot. It’s actually really close to the verge of being too much, but Wei Ying holds his breath and readies himself for the inevitable.

“Oh fuck,” Wei Ying moans as he starts to come. Lan Zhan actually does start stroking him then and all Wei Ying can do is hold on for his life. His come lands hot on his stomach, right in the middle of his happy trail. “You are so good—“

And that’s when Lan Zhan thrusts one last time and comes with a grunt. In Wei Ying’s ass. Wei Ying can feel the heat and each twitch of Lan Zhan’s cock. It’s amazing.

Wei Ying is breathing hard and trying to figure out something to say. Something to mark the occasion. Something that he’ll look back on years from now and remember with a secret smile on his face. The moment he said exactly the right thing.

“So we’re gonna do that again, right?”

Okay. So maybe not words that the poets will sing about. But they’re honest. Sincere. Wei Ying will give himself an A for effort, especially since he’s pretty sure his brain hasn’t turned back on from being fucked so spectacularly.

“Yes.”

Lan Zhan’s response, though? Perfect. No notes.

By now the come on his stomach isn’t a reminder of the beautiful union they shared. It’s just cold and tacky. Wei Ying really doesn’t like cold and tacky. So he’s about to get up and go to the bathroom when Lan Zhan reaches over him and opens up the nightstand drawer. Out comes wipes.

“You’re so damn smart,” Wei Ying mutters, biting his lip as he starts to feel Lan Zhan’s come dripping out of his hole. His hole which he is very aware of now. Wei Ying doesn’t think he’s ever been as aware of his ass as he is in this moment.

Lan Zhan starts to clean him up and Wei Ying basically blue screens. Just someone taking the time to care for him like this? Wei Ying doesn’t think he has the words and he knows a lot of words. A lot of them.

Once Lan Zhan is done cleaning them both up, and the wipes in the trash, Wei Ying asks, “So you gonna cuddle me or not?”

Next thing he knows, Wei Ying is being spooned. Lan Zhan holds him close, kissing the back of his neck as they both doze a bit.

And then Wei Ying realizes its only nine o’clock at night and he doesn’t usually go to bed after midnight. Which means he is suddenly wide awake.

Lan Zhan seems content to simply keep his eyes closed but Wei Ying’s brain doesn’t work like that. “I’m going to get some water. Want some?” he asks as he gets out of bed. Wei Ying doesn’t bother to put any clothes on cause he’s gonna live a little.

“Yes, please. Thank you.”

One thing about a studio is that he physically can’t be too far away from Lan Zhan. But even the short distance between the kitchen and the bed gives Wei Ying’s brain the chance to start thinking.

The current topic of discussion? They haven’t defined what they are.

Oh sure, Wei Ying has no doubt that Lan Zhan likes him likes him. But what does that means? Wei Ying knows what he wants. But what does Lan Zhan want? The squirrels in Wei Ying’s brain really want to know.

The question plagues him as he gets two glasses of water and brings them to the bed. By then, Lan Zhan is sitting up, pillow supporting his back. Still clearly naked, which is always in good taste.

Their hands linger together as Wei Ying hands him his glass of water. After the hand-off, Wei Ying slips in bed, sitting right next to Lan Zhan, so their shoulders touch.

“I’ve got a question for you.”

And because Wei Ying is somewhat smart, he doesn’t wait for Lan Zhan to respond.

“Hey, so, are we dating? Boyfriends? Um, I really wouldn’t mind figuring all that out before we go to sleep,” Wei Ying says. He actually said all of those words out loud. To another person, even. He is so strong. The strongest, really.

More time passes than Wei Ying likes and Lan Zhan isn’t saying anything. Which means the squirrels are getting ancy. Which means Wei Ying needs to talk.

“So I’m just gonna come out and say it. I really think we should skip the whole dating thing and go right into a relationship,” Wei Ying says. Fuck, being honest and emotionally-open is exhausting. Especially after just being fucked. How do people do this on a regular basis? “But I don’t have the only opinion that matters.”

Which is Wei Ying’s very subtle way of asking Lan Zhan what he wants.

“We are in agreement,” Lan Zhan says.

There’s just enough hesitation in Lan Zhan’s voice that Wei Ying’s heart sinks a bit. “But?” he prods, hoping Lan Zhan will be honest. That’s really the most important thing at the end of the day. That they’re honest with each other.

“I.. You are already aware the the only relationship I have been ended quite poorly,” Lan Zhan says. “I find myself lacking in experience, especially when compared to your past.”

Well, then.

That is a whole different bundle of worms. Can of beans? Whatever the saying goes. One that Wei Ying knows he can work with. Isn’t lack of experience in a certain area exactly how the two of them met in the first place?

“Oh ho ho,” Wei Ying says with a grin. He stretches out his arms in front of him and cracks his knuckles, ignoring Lan Zhan’s visible wince. “How the tables have turned.”

Lan Zhan, for his part, has a bit of an indulgent look on his face. Wei Ying thinks he’s going to become very familiar with that look.

“I happen to be quite good at relationships. Now, I won’t offer you references, because that just seems like bragging. But if you need— Shall we call them…” Wei Ying taps his chin with his finger. “Pointers. Tutorials, even. Lessons. In relationships. You’ve come to the right man.”

“That could be exactly what I need.”

“Now, this is not something I would offer to just anyone,” Wei Ying says, enjoying every moment of his newfound power. “There will be work.”

“I promise to study most diligently,” Lan Zhan says with a nod, as if that seals the deal. And it kinda does, really.

“Which is exactly what I want in a student,” Wei Ying says, beaming. He holds out his hand to Lan Zhan, palm up. “Here. Take my hand.”

And Lan Zhan does just that. His hand is slightly bigger than Wei Ying’s, but their fingers slot together perfectly. This will be a hand Wei Ying wants to hold for the rest of his life. Judging by the look in Lan Zhan’s eyes? He feels the exact same thing.

Imagine that. A lifetime together. Learning from each other. What could be more beautiful than that?

He squeezes Lan Zhan’s hand.

“Lesson one. Holding hands.”

Notes:

And Lan Zhan aces dating lessons, as we all know he would. They currently give remote BJ lessons to couples. Word of mouth referrals only.

#

Thank you so much for reading! I would love to know your thoughts. Also, here is the recipe for the caramelized onion sourdough biscuits. They are amazing.

Notes:

Thank you for reading! I would love to know your thoughts. And you can visit me on tumblr!