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The elevator was bustling with players, running and jumping around as they waited for the doors to open. PartyNoob was the only NPC in the lift, happy as always with their party horn and hat. The players kept punching them but were all right, returning to their joyful selves right after.
The players stopped as the elevator dinged! Some waited right at the doors, the metal sliders revealing the subway. The tracks were dark as usual, the dotted cyan rod lights reaching the rest of the platform. There in the darkness stood Pest, their red eyes glowing through the shadows as he stepped forward.
He watched as the players ran and jumped around the tracks, a few getting hit by the train. All normal circumstances, the bug made his way to the elevator as they happily announced: “こんにちは! 今日は素敵な日です。(Hello! Today is a lovely day.)”
They went to the elevator, noticing only PartyNoob was inside. “あなたに会うたびに私の一日は悪化します。(My day gets worse every time I see you.)” The one person he tolerated the least and no one else to distract them. PartyNoob always got on his nerves because they're just so annoying. They begrudgingly went to the other elevator corner, watching the players get teleported back.
They all waited for the next floor, Pest eyeing the timer as they heard someone punch PartyNoob. The usual “Aowhn— ” escaped their lips, frowning as their head spun around. They sound like a baby, he thought, arms crossed as they began to ignore them. They snagged a few coins from a nearby player, laughing maliciously while he smiled.
PartyNoob watched Pest return to their neutral stance, wondering what they do with all those coins he stole. Maybe he’s saving up for a super epic giant party?! Or a giant party hat! Or speakers so they can finally listen to music! Giant speakers to listen to music with! They blew their swirly party horn, bouncing excitedly as they turned to them.
“hai pest!!”
The beetle let out a low hiss, more akin to a growl to (semi) address them. He crossed his arms, the constant shade on his face elevating their red eyes.
“ 私を放っておいて 。(Leave me alone.)”
“wats ur fav party song?”
“I don’t listen to music.”
“thats wut u said las time!”
“And I still don’t listen to music.”
“i liek weezer! its fun!”
“私は気にしない。(I don’t care.)”
They both turned back to the elevator doors, the blaring sound of PartyNoob’s horn ringing in Pests’ ears. What was their deal? Did they really need to blow it every 15 seconds? 4 times in every minute, it was so damn often he counted. Who could have so much fun at parties? It’s their whole shtick, and Pest was over it immediately.
“blogsy is so AWESOME!”
You would think constantly being short with them would get them to back off, but it didn’t. They were so damn persistent, it was beyond annoying. He’s told them flat out they don’t party, listen to music, or drink blogsy. There’s no reason that PartyNoob should keep talking to him, but it seemed like they didn’t care.
The more they thought about it, the more it seemed that his insistence fueled PartyNoob rather than extinguishing them. They cursed under their breath in Japanese, trapped in a lose-lose with this idiot. And in the elevator, the players had already sprinted out onto the floor. They tried to steal from some poor tired cashier, but very few succeeded.
A few minutes passed and the doors closed once again with a ding! His mandibles chittered together as both NPCs watched the chaos unfold in the small cab. All players talked nonsense, no one cared for it as Pest heard PartyNoob get punched again. They wondered how long one player would stay around to keep beating them, knowing that, eventually, PartyNoob would kill someone.
All players seemed to make sure they got punched, it was interesting to watch. He’s seen PartyNoob get rid of a player before, it’s rather amusing all things considered. His laugh briefly echoed against the walls as they stole more coins from another unsuspecting player. The doors opened with another ding! and off the players went.
They proceeded to watch the players fail at Crossyroad, many players respawning and running back out to try again. "このエレベーターは人が少ない方がずっといい。(This elevator is much better when there are fewer people.)” Being bilingual has infinite insulting perks, no one, especially PartyNoob, knows what they say. Convenient because he despises everyone.
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It’s been five minutes and Pest wanted to leave so badly, no NPC has entered the elevator to dull PartyNoob’s antics around him. More horns, more party talk, more blogsy-- Didn’t they get their heart lasered because of overdosing on battery acid? He overheard from DrRETRO and the fool still drinks it like water.
Truly, they didn’t understand how they were still alive. There were a lot of things he didn’t understand, but PartyNoob’s naivety was just so childish. The day they wake up the real world won’t be filled with parties and confetti. The beetle thought about that reality, it was hard to imagine them like anything else.
He glanced at the noob, idly bouncing as another punch was added to his mental count. He didn’t understand how someone could be so damn joyful 24/7, it was almost entirely unimpeded, save for the players and MR. “なぜ... (Why…)” Their horn blew again, their curvy smile reminding Pest of a cat.
“hav you seen the super duper ooper cool room with the dance floor?”
He stared at them for a bit, another growl emitting from him as he crossed their arms. “ねえ、あなた、どうしてこんなことなの？(Hey, you, why are you like this?)" They looked at him confused but didn’t stop smiling.
“what? does u want to party?”
He could see their eyes light up for a moment, staring at them expectantly. He was going to tell them no but the doors dinged! It was Splitsville! and Split herself got into the elevator. PartyNoob immediately started celebrating that she was here, finally giving Pest a bit of a break.
He let themselves fade further into the background, a few chatters of their mandibles blending into the ambiance. They were still mildly annoyed with everybody, continuing to insult them in Japanese like always. They’d return to their den later, they needed a few more donations before then. PartyNoob’s horn caught their attention, crossing his arms in response.
“your very gud at stealing. i bet ur rich!”
Pest didn’t respond, staring at them weirdly. Nobody’s ever complimented their thievery, even PartyNoob should know it’s not something to view positively. They were about to respond snidely but Split caught the noob’s attention again. The elevator kept opening and closing, dinging! again and again, as unusual faces went about the generated floors.
Some were familiar, others unknown, and others they’d never see again. Pest hoped he didn’t need to be around PartyNoob much longer, always having enough even before they were in the same room. However, if Happy Home Party was revealed behind those doors, they would exit with PartyNoob.