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“It turns out our little chatterbox is one hell of an escape artist.” Ashla’s voice came as the front door swiftly slid open, jerking him from a sound sleep. He slowly pushed himself up, wincing from an ache in his back and frowned in her direction as he struggled to make his still half-asleep brain catch up to what she was saying.
“Let me guess.” He said, his voice still rough and a bit grave as he pushed himself to his feet with a groan, his joints popping in sequence and slowly stepped in their direction pulling the blankets from the floor and setting them on the couch as he went. “She got through the door locks and went on an adventure?”
“How’d you know?” She asked sounding befuddled as she stopped her wheelchair in front of him, at once he could feel Omega lean against him and lift her arms to him.
“She’s crafty like that,” Crosshair informed her as he picked Omega up and settled her on his hip, a mixture of relief and exasperation hitting him at once as he felt her wrap her arms around his neck. A tiny part of him wanted to be upset at yet another one of her escapades. But at the same time, he knew that line of thinking had been forged of his deep-rooted worry and protectiveness for her if nothing else. He always knew he was the type to care about let alone like very few, and truly love even fewer than that, but once he decided that anyone was worth the effort of caring about, as Omega and Ashla had long since grown to be. Then as far as he was considered they were his to guard, and love even if he’d never say it, especially to Ashla. Though at the same time, all of his Vode tended to share the same protective and possessive streak, at varying, and far lower degrees than he ever would. It was a kind of compulsive need that was kept thriving by keeping those he cared about safe, sure that as long as he did then it would keep bad things from happening to them. But he knew this wasn’t going to be the last time Omega would go off and explore now that she could walk and run without issue, and with it, he was trying to come to terms with the reality that he might not be able to be there to shield her forever. “We’re gonna have to come up with a signalling system when you're out there. But you shouldn’t run off like you did, without telling us first or we go with you.” He continued, turning his attention to Omega as he walked toward the kitchen, reaching back with his free hand and squeezing Ashla’s fingers when he caught them in a silent gesture of thanks, all the while trying to ignore the heat rising in his cheeks at the contact.
“Maybe a bell, and lots of them?” Ashla suggested squeezing his hand back before pulling away and turning her wheelchair toward her shelf of caf beans.
“Do you have any?” He asked, squeezing Omega in a slight hug before he set her down on the counter. And grabbed a bowl, eggs, some milk, and shredded cheese from the fridge.
“I’ll look around,” she said with a faint hint of a smile in her voice as she passed behind him, soon followed by the clattering of glasses being moved around.
“Have you tried eggs yet?” Crosshair asked turning his head toward Omega as he set the supplies next to her on the counter.
Omega only hummed in reply sounding quite negative in tone.
“Then we should fix that.” He said, the sound of the eggs cracking against the bowl made Omega squeak in surprise, a huff of amusement escaping him as he poured everything else in and handed her a fork. “Here, you can be my mixer and make sure to do it carefully,” he advised while turning on the stove.
Omega patted his hand with her tiny fingers in reply immediately followed by the sound of her stabbing the yolks and muddling the mixture in quick clumsy circles. When it was ready he took the bowl from her and scooped her up on his hip so she could watch it cook. A little salt and a pinch of red pepper seasoning later and the three were digging into full plates.
After they were done Crosshair began to clean, getting lost in both the task and his thoughts. Even with a task to do, restlessness still prickled just beneath his skin. He wanted to be back out there, searching for his Vode, or at least if he couldn’t know that the autopilot and hyperdrive of his ship were being repaired, then he needed to make or fix something or else he knew he’d drive himself crazy just sitting around. Putting the last plate in the sink, he went to grab his cane, coat and boots before going off to find Omega when he didn’t hear her or Ashla anywhere nearby. But it hadn’t taken him long until he caught the sound of Ashla‘s voice and followed it out onto the back porch, where he found her in the middle of teaching her how to take care of the herbs she grew for medicine in her little garden.
Not wanting to interrupt them, Crosshair sent a wave their way before he continued down the road in the direction he’d left his ship. A pleasantly cool breeze blew in from the lake, stinging his nose and throat when he breathed it in. The sort of thing he hadn’t taken note of many times before when he’d been laser-focused on so many other things. But now that he had no set tasks to do he was left to wander and drink in the world around him. And found that aside from their shared home, he’d found that he rather liked Hetzal Prime itself. The novelty of being able to enjoy the simplest of things still would hit him out of the blue as it was now. The way the wind rustled the frost-covered stocks of wheat on either side of the road, the almost morning chirping of Cicadas, filling the otherwise silent early winter air. Were all wildly foreign to him at first, having been long since accustomed to the presences of his Vode and the noises the Marauder, would make. That had soon been replaced by the familiarity of his little ship, cobbled together and prone to malfunctioning as it so often was that he wouldn’t have any other way. But now that he’d returned to a place he regarded as home, he found it hard to think without the planets ambiance to ground him when he needed it.
Once he’d left Bracca, he’d almost considered just moving on to the next planet even with the problems his ship had been facing. But ultimately his choice to travel back home had been made in part for a steadily building worry for Ashla when something had sounded off in their last few holocalls that he couldn’t put a finger on. Not until he’d arrived on Empire Day, and talked her down from what he suspected to be her first flashback had he finally gotten it. She had a kind of loneliness and guilt in her that he not only understood but let plague him when he let his thoughts turn toward what he’d done to his Vode. He supposed the pair of them were empty vessels, hollow, needing something to fill them up. To give them a purpose that made them feel worthy of continuing, in the way he knew those who’d been raised only for war would feel. A purpose he and Ashla had mutually found in co-parenting Omega, just as much as their friendship, and looking after each other on bad days. However, a much larger part of him knew he’d returned to this planet just because he missed being in her company, missed cooking with her and getting into playful arguments with her over coffee in the mornings that simply didn’t feel the same over a holocall. When he even thought of Ashla these days it would never fail to tug at something in Crosshair’s chest, something welcome, a little bit light, a little bit painful. An ache of longing and belonging that he was learning to sit with comfortably now even if he didn’t know the word for how he felt about her. He knew something had started changing between them ever since that first night he’d helped distract her from the fireworks like an invisible wall between them had crumbled to dust. And from that point on he knew wherever they were headed together, he could be happy about it.
The feelings of his cane colliding with something hard made Crosshair jump, slowly he reached out, finding a large flat boulder, overgrown with soft and fuzzy moss. Carefully he took a seat atop it, a confused frown forming as he turned his head from side to side trying to figure out where he’d ended up. Only then did his ears catch the soft rush of waves lapping against the lake shore, he huffed slightly in amusement at his carelessness but still shifted until he was comfortable knowing he didn’t have anything better to do. He was certain he could have checked on the repairs to the ship as he’d originally planned, but at the same time, he knew if the restorations did need his attention then G-G would come to get him.
So left with nothing to distract him, Crosshair reached into the pockets of his coat and pulled out three differently-sized items. The first was a small box Ashla had gifted him the morning after they’d returned.?He held the gift tightly in his hand, the corners biting into the calloused skin of his palm. He wasn’t entirely sure how she knew he’d like them, but he could only guess he had mentioned them in passing at one point and she’d managed to find some for him. But her gift had sat there tucked away, unopened until that moment, he wasn’t sure where she’d gotten them but he’d wanted to wait until he needed one in case he ran out and they wouldn’t be able to get any more. Slowly he pulled the lid off the box, snagged one of the toothpicks and stuck it in his mouth. Grinding it between his teeth his dread only growing as he picked up the Hypertransceiver, he’d managed to cobble together from the Comlink Ashla had fixed for him and the pair had later modified with the pieces of an old radio, the cord of a headset already plugged into it.
For a moment Crosshair only sat there, his finger already on the frequency dial once it was turned on but not making any move to turn it. He could call his Vode now if he had a mind to, but if he did would they pick up, or receive it at all? Would they even want to hear his voice again after what he’d done?
Once Ashla had finished explaining all that she could about her psychometry, she’d soon after reported everything she could remember from what she’d read in the comlink down to the tiniest of details when he’d pressed her for them. The moment he’d been told his vode were free he’d felt a colossal weight immediately be lifted from his shoulders, even as the faintest hints of resentment had formed in him that he’d done his best to snuff out. While he had become imprisoned, they had all walked away from the chip’s influence, their minds strong, bodies and memories all intact, and more importantly still together. So out of all of them, why had it been him?
Why had it been him who’d had his mind and body violated for nearly a year or more?
Forced to hunt his Vode like they were nothing but a bounty to collect a reward for,
Forced to try and execute them when they dared to resist.
That realisation had swiftly stamped out any resentment that could have tried to truly take root within Crosshair’s mind, leaving a yawning pit in its place, threatening to swallow him.
For as long as he’d trained and fought beside his Vode it had been his job to know where they were, to keep them from harm. But once, when he’d been training as a cadet one of the targets in his sights had moved the moment he’d pulled the trigger. Gone was the battle droid and in its place was the familiar taller armoured body of his twin. That had left him nothing to do but watch as the blaster bolt made contact in a burst of light. He recalled being utterly inconsolable for weeks, and after Tech had been healed. Crosshair had known he’d rather die than ever see any of his Vode at the other end of his scope again. Yet no matter how hard he tried, he had still shot at them, even if it hadn’t been his choice. He only hoped his Vode would believe him once he could reach them. And to do that he knew he had to start trying instead of working himself up to it any longer now that he had the equipment to do it.
Sliding the headset over his ears he slowly turned the device's braille-labelled dial, forming a frequency he knew by heart until his ears were filled with a soft static noise, letting him know something resembling a signal had just been reached. “Transmission attempt one,” Crosshair spoke clearly into the headset's little microphone, all the while willing his voice not to break. “Do you read me, Havoc Leader?” He paused to gather his thoughts and take a few deep breaths, having to swallow hard in an attempt to remove the forming lump in his throat at just being able to say his eldest Vode’s call sign again. “This is Havoc Five reporting in.” He stated his voice taking on a clinical note in the way it always would after every fight he needed to mentally decompress from, the old way of speaking slipping back into place like a well-worn glove. “In case this doesn’t reach you, I won’t give you my location,” he closed his eyes and took a deep breath to continue without breaking down like he wanted. “And I am no longer compromised. I will try to rendezvous with you and the squad soon, but until then, stay as under the radar as you can. And for what it’s worth… I am sorry.” He sighed and furiously rubbed at his face with the heel of his hand when his eyes started to sting with tears. “Havick Five signing off.”
Crosshair’s shoulders slumped as he removed the headset placing it and the transceiver beside him on the boulder and rested his chin on his fist, biting down a bit harder on his toothpick. His hand moved the dial again. Becoming lost in listening to unfamiliar clone’s comb channels he hastily flicked through picking up pieces of reports here and there. That he’d soon grow disinterested in when they weren’t saying any of the designation numbers or names he’d wanted. The few times he’d tested the little device he’d been listening for any sightings of his Vode’s ship just as much as for any of Ashla’s remaining squad. Hoping to catch wind of their numbers or where they were stationed if nothing else. Though he knew she had yet to ask him to start searching for them, he’d started picking up on her both trying and failing to work up the nerve. So he’d figured it couldn’t hurt to keep an ear out for them.
A faint jingling noise reached the edges of his hearing, yanking Crosshair from his thoughts. Sitting up straight he leaned forward the slightest bit, his senses on high alert as he listened closely for the sound, turning his head to track it. It came again soon followed by the soft crunch of tiny feet hurrying in his general direction. When it was close enough, he pursed his lips and made a long, high note. A signal he’d made with Wrecker when they’d been younger and needed to tell where they were during training missions and one couldn’t see the other.
At once Omega’s startled little gasp greeted him the patter of her footsteps turning his way and drawing a grin from him. When she found him she made a bewildered noise and reached up as high as she could. Until she grabbed hold of his fingers and tugged at them pointing between the sounds of a distant flock of chattering crows and himself with it as if asking if that had been him.
“No, I’m not a bird,” Crosshair said and bit his lip to keep from laughing, the negative and rather unwelcome thoughts being swept away like dew in the sun at her simply being there. “To sound like a bird, that uses a special skill called mimicry.” He explained automatically shifting down toward her on the boulder until he felt his feet hit the ground. “With lots of practice, you can learn to sound like anything you hear. Birds, animals, and even other people. I’ve never gotten that far, I can only throw my voice when the need arises. From what I remember your Ba'vodu Echo could do it, even if he used it to mimic enemy droids when we had to be stealthy.”
In reply, Omega gently squeezed his fingers again pointed it at herself with a confused noise and leaned against his legs before lifting her arms against his knees in a silent request to be picked up.
“Of course, you can learn Cyar'ika,” he said scooping her up and running a free hand through her hair pausing when his fingertips landed on tiny bells made out of a great number of beads tangled in her hair with messy braids that seemed as though they were barely being held together. He snorted softly at the discovery of what he knew to be Ashla’s work and began to undo them. Pulling each bell out one by one as he combed his fingers through Omega's hair, making sure to stop and attend to any tangles he found. “If you wanted to, I’ve found that the easiest place to start is to learn how to whistle.”
While Crosshair raked her hair smooth once more and the minutes flew by he’d soon come to learn that she was adamant despite her initial lack of skill. He was very impressed with just how stubborn she turned out to be. When she would reach over to demand with a tug on his arm to see him whistle many times before trying again to make the same note he did. But as he resumed his ministrations each time, he grew less and less surprised at her persistence though it did cause him to wonder just who she’d inherited it from between Ashla and himself.
“Try and remember to breathe,” he cautioned as he portioned her shoulder-length hair into three thick strands and soon found himself humming the piece of a song from one of the holos Ashla had shown him and had been stuck in his head since Empire Day. Omega audibly perked up at a sound he hadn’t done often, but she seemed to love it every time he would. A faint smile formed on his lips when he felt her lean against his chest as he carefully began to weave the bells back in. Deftly braiding the strands together before tying off the ends with small pieces of ribbon he’d started carrying around just for this purpose, and even fashioning the leftover ribbon into a bow atop her head once it was all done.
Before he could check his work for any mistakes there came a sharp, piercing sound startling him into freezing, his fingers brushing the base of one. The source it seemed was Omega, who was so similarly startled by the sound that she had produced that she fell over with a yelp.
“You ok!” He cried, his hands moving before she could hit her head on anything.
Omega sat up slowly, with a little shocked gasp, before whistling the same high note he’d shown her that she seemed unable to believe she had produced on her own.
“You did it!” Crosshair beamed and whistled a long lower note back. Making Omega giggle, delightedly repeating the single note back, several more times. With some coaxing, he guided her to sit up straighter to maximise her airflow, and with careful guidance, had her whistling a simple, three-note melody by midday. Delighting in the simplicity of whistling back and forth with her, a warm feeling spreading through his chest at her progress and excitement at the new ability.
When Crosshair suddenly felt her tiny hand settle onto his right one he didn’t think much of it and just enfolded his fingers over hers. As if activated by the touch, something began to take shape in his mind's eye. Of the light from a faraway sun, a cloudless blue sky and a seemingly endless field of frost-coated wheat spreading out beneath it. His eyes grew wide when he soon realised he was seeing a part of Hetzal for the very first time. But none of that had held a candle to the sight of Omega, the sun's light bouncing off the neutral green and grey beads in her hair, causing the brown of her eyes to almost appear as though it had been lit from within. Allowing him a full view of her face, and revealing the widest smile he’d ever seen. It was everything Ashla had ever described to him yet at the same time it was so much more than that. Because this was real, this was having a face to match her laughter and her voice. A kind of healing balm settling over the part of him that had grieved never getting to see someone who was the living embodiment of his heart. His reason for continuing to get up each day, on the times he’d begun to feel the hopelessness of his mission. He also had an image he would burn into his memory just as he’d done with his Vode and his Buir, in case he never got a gift like it again.
Yet just as quick as it had come, the image faded slowly from his mind's eye as he felt Omega pull her hand away. Drawing a ragged gasp from him, his body jerked as though he’d just been slammed back into his head. “Did you do that?!” Crosshair breathed, beginning to feel a dampness on his cheeks, shakily he lifted a finger and traced it. Only then realising he’d been crying, even as his shoulders shook and his face ached from how hard he was smiling.
“Buir,” Omega said, clearly unfamiliar with actually pronouncing the word but she was giving it her best shot. Reaching up and wrapping her arms around his neck with a little hum as if to confirm what she’d done.
“How did you do that?!” He asked his voice, stunned, slowly returning the embrace. The fact that she’d spoken to him as much as her gift was slowly hitting him in the same instance, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, his tears falling into her hair.
“Mæ̀,” Omega said simply as if that one name would tell him everything he needed to know.
“Ashla helped you too,” he breathed but swiftly cut himself off before he finished, but admittedly he knew he didn’t have to, in a strange sort of way he knew he should have come to expect something like this. Especially when it came to the pair of Force users he’d been lucky enough to meet and form an Aliit with.
Crosshair’s breath hitched as he quickly pushed himself to his feet, snatching up his cane with his free hand. Forgetting anything else he might have brought with him as he started back in the direction of home breaking into a jog halfway there.
“Cross?” Ashla asked, soon followed by the sounds of tools and pushing herself back to her feet with her cane once she caught sight of them. “What’s wrong, are you ok?”
Crosshair slowed to an eventual stop in front of her not saying a word as he pulled her into a fierce one-armed embrace, enfolding Omega between them, and he could feel one tiny arm move to hug both her parents. While he’d been caught in a mix of silently crying so strong he was rendered momentarily speechless by it. Utter awe and love for the pair filled him until he was fit to burst with it. Before he knew what he was doing he’d found himself lightly touching his forehead to Ashla’s in a Keldabe kiss before he did the same with Omega. “Thank you,” he breathed at last to both of them once he was sure he could speak without a sob choking him. Put as much weight in those two words as he could, knowing he had no other way of articulating the immensity of his emotions and only hoped it would be enough to convey the gratitude he felt to them both.