Archive of Our Own ^beta

Loneliness was easier.

Being alone around a hundred people was easier than thinking about anything. Better than thinking about soft skin or bright smiles. Lashes catching the final rays of the sun while laughter brightened the emptiness left by everyone else that he’d ever known. It was better than the simmering bitterness of watching someone else with him. He wasn’t enough.

He’d never have been enough.

The trains clattering broke the spell of his own self loathing long enough that Hitoshi remembered that he was bleeding. He didn’t need to return to the agency today. Today he was able to go home and simply wait for his next shift. Rain made villains sloppy and put heroes too far at ease. His father was right about that. Aizawa might have adopted him, but as far as parents went this was the best possible outcome.

The slosh of his boots was loud to his ears as he slipped inside of his apartment. He’d taken the way he was most familiar with. The door to the balcony that was never locked. His shoes clattered louder than he’d have liked by the door as he turned heel and went to take a shower. The gash in his arm wasn’t bad enough for stitches. Neither was the one in his back. Rainwater and blood dripped off of him as he started peeling off his uniform.

When the bathroom door opened Hitoshi didn’t bother to look. He knew it was Denki without even needing to hear his voice. He could feel the electricity over his skin without a single touch. “What?”

”I heard… ‘Toshi you’re bleeding.” Denki’s voice pitched with worry and Hitoshi finally looked at him.

Hitoshi glanced in the mirror and finally looked at Denki. “It’s not as bad as it looks.”

He didn’t have the energy to pretend it didn’t still hurt. He finished peeling off his clothes so he could shower off the grime. Denki like always waited to bandage him once he’d dried and Hitoshi ached. Denki smelled like cologne and beer and cheap bar food.

Right. Kirishima got engaged. He’d worked while everyone else celebrated a happy moment.

“Everyone missed you. I told them you’ve been doing great. As far as underground heroes you’re almost as good as Aizawa already.” Denki smiled at him. It faded after a moment. “‘Toshi, you look exhausted.”

“Long shift. I’m gonna try to sleep. I’ll message Kirishima congratulations.” Hitoshi mumbled. He threw his clothes in the hamper and left Denki where he was. There wasn’t a point dragging out the conversation when he lacked the energy to pretend it didn’t hurt. What mattered was that Denki was happy.

His bed was a welcome companion now that he’d washed away the filth he’d had to crawl through. His phone chirping with notifications from friends. Pictures of the engagement party. Kirishima had his arm around a man that Hitoshi had never met. The quiet looking sort that faded into the background.

Except the background was Bakugou. He was pretending too. Surrounded by bottles and empty shot glasses with a feral expression on his face like always, but it didn’t reach his eyes. After all, Kirishima moved on too. Kirishima and Bakugou had always been inseparable until Kirishima wanted more than Bakugou was able to give him.

Denki had told him about how Kirishima wanted a real relationship and Bakugou had bitched about not needing to change things. So Kirishima moved on. Denki moved on. He flipped through a few more photos before locking his phone and staring up at the ceiling waiting for sleep or at least some sort of haze to come over him.

Hitoshi glanced at his phone as it chimed. Whoever was awake was probably an idiot. Thank fuck for spell check it seemed because Bakugou never texted him unless he was out drinking and choosing to pick a fight. They never exchanged more than a few texts a month outside of it unless they were discussing an event invitation or work.

BakuHo: 2639362.jpg

Hitoshi cocked a brow downloading the photo. It was shaky and poorly lit, but there was a mop of brown hair attached to a dick. It didn’t take a genius to gather what was happening from the watery eyes on the nameless man. Snorting Hitoshi texted back.

Me: Congratulations losing your virginity.
BakuHo: Fuck you. You wish it was you.
Me: Not really. But that could be you if you paid me enough.
BakuHo: In your dreams. You wouldn't be able to handle me.
Me: I’m sure sugar tits. Text me when you think you could keep up.
BakuHo: Fuck off. I could without trying.
Me: I doubt it. Ask me when you’re ready to get tied up, slapped, and call me Daddy.

The silence that followed was a welcome reprieve. At least until his phone chimed again. This time it was a photo of the man’s face covered in cum and all sorts of other shit. He’d never been attracted to someone covered in snot and tears. Locking his phone Hitoshi rolled over ignoring the chirps of his friends sending him photos from the night. It wasn’t worth looking at just yet.

He could hear Tetsu in the kitchen when he finally woke up. It twisted his stomach and he fought the urge to be angry. It wouldn’t have been fair to Denki. Tetsutetsu was a good friend. He treated Denki the way Hitoshi wished he could. He didn’t have that kind of emotional maturity and he knew it. Hitoshi pulled on a shirt and left his room.

It was too bright for someone that worked in the dark. Running at his eyes as he walked into the kitchen he made his way straight to the coffee. “Morning.”

“I didn’t even hear you come home.” Tetsu smiled at him. “We have to head out soon, but we need a favor.”

“Bakugou is asleep on the couch. Apparently he decided to drink all night and is too sloshed to remember where his new apartment is so Jirou dropped him off here.” Denki groaned. He gave Hitoshi the most pitiful look and it was never easy to say no to that face. “Just try not to kill him? Let him sober up and send him home or something.”

“I’ll get the good pillows and do the whole job,” Hitoshi muttered before taking a sip of his coffee.

“‘Toshi, please? Just do this for me?” Denki looked stressed and as much as he wanted to feel pity all he could feel was a void in the center of his being.

“Fine.” He could manage a few hours with Bakugou. The short wave he gave Denki and Tetsu tested the limits of his exhaustion. Tetsu was gentle and kind when it came to Denki and he could appreciate it despite the ache in his chest. His attention shifted to the man on his couch.

Bakugou was a bitch. Everyone knew that. His personality was enough to turn anyone off. Yet the man had a lot of friends. He was the sort of dick everyone wanted to be around. It was an annoyance he could deal with now that his roommate had left. Leaning over the couch he looked at Bakugou. “Bitch.”

Hitoshi took the remote in hand and turned the volume all the way up. He turned on the first rock song he could find and almost cackled as Bakugou jerked upright with crackling palms ready for a fight. “Time to get up.”

“What the fuck?” Bakugou’s words were slurred and his brows furrowed after gathering his surroundings. “Why the hell are you in Spark Plugs apartment?”

“I live here.” Hitoshi pointed out. The blond simply grumbled at him as he got up and made himself at home in the kitchen making something from the leftovers in the fridge that hadn’t gone bad. It was amusing to watch Bakugou try to cook while still tipsy.

The blond fished a beer out of the bottom of the fridge with a look of annoyance at the brand as he read the bottle. His damn fault for stealing beer. They only bought cheap shit. “The fuck uou staring at?”

“The man that sent me lewd drunk texts. My innocence will never be the same.” Hitoshi gave a dramatic sigh. The way Bakugou froze was perfect.

“I wouldn’t do that. No one wants your creepy ass.” Bakugou barked.

“Sure. You didn’t send me pictures of a man choking on your cock. Or one with cum all over his face.” Hitoshi mused loudly as he pulled up the photo just to show it to Bakugou. He watched in amusement as the blond immediately focused back on what he was cooking. It was hard not to want to laugh at him.

“Fuck off.” Bakugou’s mutter was one of defeat and all Hitoshi could do was smile to himself as he started scrolling through cat photos. It felt like all was right in the world as he went about his normal daily business.

He glanced up as a bowl was handed to him. He’d made himself comfortable on the couch and now he was being offered food. “You know the good booze is in the cabinet above the fridge. You might as well grab something.”

“What are you fucking mooing about?” Bakugou sneered as he sat down with his food and a beer in hand.

“I’m not going to pretend I don’t know what this is about. Kirishima moved on and now you’re acting like a fucking child. So grab some booze and we’ll watch shitty tv until one of us gives enough of a fuck to survive.” Hitoshi smirked at him. He must have hit the nail on the head because Bakugou slammed down his dish and beer stomping off toward the kitchen where glasses clattered and he heard bottles being opened. “Make me one!”

It was easier to drink in silence while they had on some stupid reality show. By the end of the first episode his head was buzzing. It was nice to pretend there wasn’t a world outside of the apartment. That his world wasn’t a little more empty without Denki next to him every morning. Hitoshi knocked back the last of his drink and brought over a few of the bottles topping off their drinks as he leaned back. This was easier than thinking.

He lost track of time as they started playing a game. The front door opened as Hitoshi realized it was dark out. “Welcome home!” Hitoshi shouldered Bakugou successfully fucking up his streak as he cackled.

“What the hell, ‘Toshi?! You were supposed to sober him up!” Denki wheezed as he scrambled for his phone. “He’s gonna be so mad.”

“Shut the fuck up and grab a controller.” Bakugou barked snatching Denki’s phone so he could slam it down on the coffee table.

“Fine.” Denki snapped. He snatched an extra controller and frowned at Tetsu. “Grab one.”

“So we’re just gonna play games?” Tetsu looked incredibly confused.

“No. You’re going to play games and get shit faced with us.” Hitoshi grinned at him. He blinked for a moment before kicking Bakugou’s leg. “Fuck you. That’s cheating you bitch.”

Bakugou cackled kicking him back as they passed around booze and talked shit to each other like it was a normal day. Like Hitoshi hadn’t seen the look in Bakugou’s eyes earlier. He recognized that one. He’d made the same expression for months.

By the time Denki and Tetsu called it quits Tetsu needed to carry Denki back to the bedroom while the blond screeched lyrics from a rock song no one had heard that he continued to insist was the best one ever made. It left silence. “Come on asshole. You’re sleeping in my room. You rub your depression stink all over my couch and I’ll never get it out.”

Bakugou was drunk enough Hitoshi had to walk him to the room and throw him onto the bed. His head was buzzing and Hitoshi dropped himself down on the mattress in the dark feeling more content than he had in a long while. It was nice. Pretending it was all okay was nice. No thinking about depression for once or about the looming finality of Denki’s current relationship and how it could have been him.

Hitoshi woke to birds and silence within his bedroom. The bed was empty. So was the rest of the apartment. So he continued on the same way he had. Eat, entertain himself, and sleep. He didn’t party and only went to bars when he was invited. He could buy a whole bottle for the price of three shots at a bar. Hitoshi lay himself out on the couch scrolling through social media pointedly ignoring Denki and Tetsu’s posts.

There wasn’t a point to it. He flicked through Deku’s was filled with analysis and appreciation for other heroes. He’s never make any of the lists and he was content with being a silent cog in the machine. He didn’t need notoriety to feel like he was making a difference. Hitoshi rolled onto his side finding a new set of cat videos posted from one of his favorite accounts. Cute.

DenkiDoodle: I’m sleeping over at Tetsu’s tonight. Don’t stay up too late. There’s left over pizza in the fridge so you can eat it if you want. I can’t remember when we ordered it.

Probably two months ago. Denki was in the habit of forgetting. Hitoshi rolled the other way, turning his screen off. Now he was stuck for the rest of the night and likely the next day in a silent apartment. The idea of just drinking himself into a stupor again was sounding better by the second. A minute was too long.

Rolling himself off of the couch he found Denki’s stash of strawberry flavored whatever it was. The label was scratched beyond recognition, but the burn of the first swig made sure it didn’t matter as he threw himself back on the couch turning on the first film that popped up in the horror category. It wasn’t anything great, but it was better than his thoughts.

And if he was a better person he wouldn’t have spared a moment of consideration for the fact Denki could change his plan and come home. Except, he knew he could and still scrolled through the countless list of names and faces he could barely remember until he found one he’d put a star next to. Taking another few swigs of the liquor he’d stolen he waited.

The text he’d sent was returned in a few minutes and Shinsou reminded them to bring more booze. He couldn’t even remember if it was a man or a woman he’d texted. Men were better, but a fuck was a fuck at the end of the day. It was better to feel something balls deep in a stranger than whatever the fuck his head liked to throw at him in the silence when he was alone.

His head was throbbing when he heard the front door. A liquor bottle clattered off of the bed as he heard something being said loudly in the living room and crawling out of an empty bed to pull on joggers just to see what Denki was talking about made him grimace. Denki’s was standing in the middle of the living room with his hands on his hips staring at him. “What?”

“What?! Dude, our apartment is trashed. Like there is pizza on my couch blanket!” Denki finally broke into a whine. He held up the filthy blanket. “What the hell did you do? Throw a party?”

“No. I had someone over.” Hitoshi groaned as he walked over pulling the blinds. “Fuck, its bright.”

“It’s almost sunset.” Denki huffed grabbing a little wastebasket throwing empty beer bottles into it. “Please tell me this was six people.”

“Just me and a friend,” Hitoshi mumbled peeling the pizza off of the blanket so it could be washed. “I was gonna clean.”

“‘Toshi. This is way too much liquor for two people. Have you even been sober since I left yesterday morning?” Denki stared at him incredulously. When Hitoshi didn’t answer he shook his head throwing another bottle into the bin. “Is this mine? You owe me another one jerk. I told you it was good and you didn’t believe me.”

“Tastes like a strawberry hooker.” Hitoshi sneered at him.

“Yeah, well you look like one. You have lipstick all over your face.” Denki snorted. “You need to cut back on the booze. You’re going to damage your liver or something.”

“Wasn’t that much.” Hitoshi gathered the last few beer bottles throwing them into the bin. “It’s not like I drink like this all the time.”

“No. You don’t. At least you’re not the sort that goes out and pays for illegal shit. I’ve seen heroes that do that. It gets ugly pretty fast.” Denki’s shoulders sag. “I’m just worried ‘Toshi. You’ve been really weird for the last few weeks since you took that cross country mission. I don’t think I’ve seen you smile since then. Not a real one at least.”

How was he supposed to tell him that the time gave him enough space to realized he’d fucked his whole life up? Hitoshi snorted and shook his head. “I’m good. You see some really fucked up shit working underground. Just processing some stuff is all.”

“There better not be more bottles in your room.” Denki skirted around him before Hitoshi could grab him. “Dude! Your room smells like a bar bathed a hooker. Ew.”

“Denki!” Hitoshi hissed as Denki pulled his blinds open and propped open his window to air it out. The blond was ignoring him as he collected bottles like Hitoshi wasn’t capable of it.

“You’re buying more booze for the house. Holy shit, I thought Tetsu and Kirishima could down a bar and walk it off. Like this is impressive even for you.” Denki was laughing as he started pulling blankets off of Hitoshi’s bed like he used to do when they’d been dating. His stomach twisted as his chest felt tight and all Hitoshi could do was watch for a moment.

“Kitten!” He snarled. Denki’s hands froze as Hitoshi grabbed the blanket out of his hands. “Get out. Of. My. Room.”

“I was just trying to…” Denki looked away as he slowly nodded. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to be pushy.”

“I can fix my own bed.” Hitoshi breathed out slowly feeling the guilt flooding in. His shoulders sagged. “I’m not mad. I just need some space. I’ve got a lot of shit going on. I know you’re being helpful.”

He wanted to touch him. He wanted to cup his face and say something sweet, but he didn’t have the words. He never had them even when they were together past their awkward pet names. “I’ll finish. Just go. Alright?”

“You sure you’re okay?” Denki’s eyes flicked upward to look at him and Hitoshi almost wavered.

“I’m fine. Go. Hangovers making me bitchy.” Hitoshi grumbled focusing on wadding up the blankets.

“Always does.” Denki chirped after watching him for a moment. “I’m gonna order pizza!”

Hitoshi watched him leave before glancing at his phone as it chirped.

BakuHo: Bet I can drink you under the table. I’m waiting.
BakuHo shared his location.

Fuck it.

Denki looked up as Hitoshi walked out of his room pulling on a jacket. The blond looked confused about him changing into jeans and a wrinkled shirt. Hitoshi had put on just enough cologne to cover the stale smell of alcohol. He didn’t feel like bothering with a shower, but he’d cleaned up his face and brushed his teeth as the bare minimum.

“‘Toshi? Are you leaving?” Denki got up as the door sounded with a knock. Whatever else he’d meant to say was cut off with Hitoshi handing him the pizza and gesturing for him to pay the man as he finished pulling on his shoes. “At least text me if you’re going home tonight.”

“Sure.” He wasn’t going to. Hitoshi had no intention of it. For all he cared he could disappear on a bender until his next shift.

The bar was filthy in the hidden back alley kind of way and Bakugou was already seated in a booth at the far corner. Hitoshi dropped himself into the seat across and let his head fall back with a groan.

“No fucking kidding.” Bakugou sneered. He poured a shot for him and pushed it over. “Less being a bitch. More drinking.”

“You trying to get me drunk so I’ll actually throw you a pity fuck?” Hitoshi smirked as he knocked it back. “You know what makes me want to laugh. I got shit faced last night and Denki tried to clean my room.”

“Tch. I got home and Kirishima had let himself in to feed my cat. The fucker has an automatic feeder.” Bakugou cackled. He threw back his own shot and poured them another. “I could have gotten four bottles for what this shit costs so you better help me drink the whole thing.”

“Could have just invited me over. Pussy. When did you get a cat? I always pegged you for a dog person.” He could do this. They weren’t pouring their hearts out over drinks. They were bickering like they did in school and it was easy. Almost fun if he was honest with himself.

Bakugou pulled a face at him like always. “Dog needs more attention. I work too damn much. Ei wanted a dog. I wanted a cat. So I got the damn cat. Bastard is ugly as hell.”

“It’s a cat. They’re not ugly.” Hitoshi huffed waving the bar girl down for some water. As Bakugou turned his phone he choked. “Holy fuck. Is that a cat or a lab experiment?”

“That’s what I’m saying! It’s missing half its fur.” Bakugou wheezed out one of his ugly hyena laughs.

“No one I’ve ever met even has those. That shit is expensive.” Hitoshi took his phone flicking through the cat's photos. “These things are over 300,000nyen.”

“Seriously? I got the fucker for free. Chick said he was too loud.” Bakugou snatched his phone back. He poured another shot for them each. “I don’t know how you can live with Spark Plug.”

“Eh.” Hitoshi shrugged absently. “Cheaper rent and if I’m bored enough I have background noise to jack off to.”

Bakugou choked on his shot hard enough liquid dripped out of his nose. “That’s fucking shit. No way in hell you’re that desperate.”

Hitoshi gave him a vicious look. “You’d never know. So are we drinking to drink or is this some kind of bro fest where we drink and cry and tag team a random slut from the bar we never talk about again because our balls touched?”

“Ain’t gay if our balls touch.” Bakugou laughed knocking back another. Hitoshi had already lost count at this point as the buzz settled in. “You look like shit.”

“‘nother few and I’ll look like a good option since you can’t get fucked by the asshole you want and your discount replacement is already on layaway,” Hitoshi smirked as Bakugou splashed him with water snarling something under his breath.

It was surprising they didn’t get kicked out with how loudly they started throwing insults at each other. It was fun even though they had to throw a bag on the bottle Bakugou had bought so they could leave before they’d completely finished it. Bakugou was stumbling just as bad as he was trying to keep a straight face when they ended up in a park on the swings passing the bottle looking up at the city lights.

“I fucked some girl last night and I don’t even remember her name. You’d think it’d be worth it but I’m not even sure if I came.” Hitoshi burst out into laughter. Bakugou snorted and started laughing too until they were both almost in drunken hysterics. The blond tilted the bottle back a little too far and fell off the swing making Hitoshi laugh even harder when the man just took another swig and held it up for him.

“Holy shit. I’m fucking trashed.” Hitoshi could hear himself slurring.

“Maybe next time drink after you rail someone. You might actually figure out if it was good.” Bakugou wiped whiskey off of his face as he sat up.

“That’s gonna require me trying to give a fuck. I’m not sure I’m able to. You know he dumped me because I wasn’t affectionate enough? I don’t need to hold hands with someone to care about them in public.” Hitoshi groaned tilting the bottle back and frowned. He turned it upside down shaking it. “Fucker. You drank the rest of it.”

“Eat shit and die. You know Ei wanted to get married? We’re too damn young for that. So I told him I’m not ready to settle down and he took it as I don’t fucking care. Wouldn’t even let me explain why. He did the whole kicked puppy shit and left.” Bakugou kicked Hitoshi in the back from where he was laying and cackled when he went ass up as he fell off the swing.

Hitoshi groaned sitting up throwing a punch at Bakugou’s thigh. “Bastard.”

“You have seen Ei’s face when he realized I fucked one of his future groomsmen. He moved on to this guy after three weeks like I was some kind of easy lay the whole three years we’d dated. And he had the audacity to say we were never dating.” Bakugou sat up punching him in the shoulder. The blond stumbled to his feet searching his pockets.

“Probably never even asked him out shithead. Let me crash at your place. I’m not dealing with Denks tonight.” Hitoshi punched him in the hip as his stood up. He frowned when Bakugou grabbed his arm. “What?”

“Place is on the other side of the park. I’m ordering takeout. The fuck you want?” Bakugou punched him in the chest knocking the wind out of him as he laughed and started stumbling into the darkness.

“I’m gonna beat your ass if you keep punching me. Order ramen.” Hitoshi complained as loudly as he could just to annoy him.

Bakugou’s cat was incredibly sweet compared to the blond and the whole apartment was outfitted as a cats personal playground. It was almost cute. They were forcing water down their throats between the overly sweet cans of fruit flavored alcohol. They didn’t burn as much. Hell, Bakugou’s bathroom was decorated like it came out of a magazine. The whole place was fantastic.

Bakugou ended up face down on the coffee table before Hitoshi even finished his ramen. Hitoshi took a bit to familiarize himself with the apartment before awkwardly pulling the other man to his feet leaning against each other as he took him back to the bedroom. He barely registered falling asleep next to him until he felt a knee in his back.

He pushed him away and closed his eyes again. Bitch took up too much of the bed. His head was pounding when he finally did wake up. Bakugou face down snoring like a broken motorcycle. Drool all over the pillow and his hair in more directions than usual. Hitoshi mumbled something slapping his back.

What he didn’t expect was Bakugou barging his way into the bathroom with a dirty look on his face as he unfastened his pants. He half expected him to shoulder him over, but the blond didn’t last thing he even expected. He kicked a stool over and pissed in the fucking sink like a frat boy. Hitoshi couldn’t help himself. He started laughing for a moment before he groaned feeling the hangover settling in.

“Fucking ridiculous. You brush your teeth there.” Hitoshi snorted watching Bakugou shake his dick.

“Got cleaner under the sink. Better than pissing in the tub. You try doing that when you’re not steady on your feet.” Bakugou grumbled as he washed his hands stepping aside so Hitoshi could do the same.

“You step into the tub dumbass.” Hitoshi gave him a lopsided grin as he opened his cabinet grabbing the first painkillers he could find before furrowing his brows. “They have you on this?”

“Shoulders. My quirk has nasty kickback.” Bakugou frowned at him putting the bottle Hitoshi had grabbed back in the cabinet and handing him a different bottle. “Take the other one and you’re gonna be high enough to forget what the color seven tastes like.”

“Sounds like a good time to me. Starving. Tell me you have food.” Hitoshi huffed throwing back the painkillers and took a mouthful of sink water to wash it down. He put the bottle back following Bakugou into the kitchen throwing himself down on a kitchen stool as the blond started digging through the fridge. “Make me something good.”

“Porridge and pickled plums. Makes my hangover quit faster than the rest of the shit I could feed you.” Bakugou rolled his eyes. “You’re not a bad drinking buddy.”

“My head is killing me.” Hitoshi groaned as he checked his phone while it blinked low-battery notifications. “Denki was blowing up my phone last night I guess. ‘Toshi text me. ‘Toshi when are you coming home? ‘Toshi I’m worried about you. ‘Toshi please call me.”

His reading was interrupted by Bakugou snatching his phone typing something and setting it back on the kitchen island. Hitoshi picked up his phone and barked out a laugh.

Me: Didn’t text because Bakugou was choking on my dick last night.
Me: Hips hurt too much to walk home.

Hitoshi shook his head. “He’s going to take that seriously you know.”

“Like I give a fuck. Maybe he’ll stop flaunting metal mouth in your face. That’s a dick move.” Bakugou was being sweet in his own shitty way and Hitoshi could appreciate it either way.

Denki: wtf you guys hate each other
Denki: tell me ur lying

Denki must have been typing fast to actually send him that kind of text. Hitoshi just grinned texting him back.

Me: We went out for drinks. He asked me over. We fucked.
Me: I’ll be home later. He’s making me breakfast.
Denki: I’m coming over there.
Me: Don’t.

“He’s saying he’s gonna come over. I’m not dealing with this shit.” Hitoshi groaned feeling his stomach rumble. “He’s gonna bitch at my dad.”

“What’s Aizawa gonna do? Lecture you?” Bakugou threw seasoning into the pot and rocked back on his feet. “Not like he could fault you for getting drunk and fucking someone. How many people have you even crawled into bed with since Denki just to have a pity party for yourself?”

“Dunno. Like twenty?” Hitoshi chuckled. “Half of them sucked.”

“Impressive considering you’re a depressing cunt.” Bakugou sneered.

“Bully me more baby. Might get my dick hard.” Hitoshi rolled his eyes letting his face rest against the cool surface. It was nice. He could have fallen asleep if it wasn’t for the sudden pounding on Bakugou’s front door. “Shit. He was serious.”

“Of course he was,” Bakugou growled stomping over to the door jerking it open. “What?”

Denki looked startled and pulled a face shoving his way into the apartment. “What is wrong with you? First, you wreck Kirishima’s engagement party and now you’re spite fucking my best friend? Is there anything you’re not trying to destroy right now? Leave Hitoshi alone! And you need to get your shit together ‘Toshi. Stay away from Bakugou before he ruins you too.”

“I can make my own choices, Denki. If I want to go out and get railed in a bathroom stall by this asshole for fun you can’t say shit. We’re not together anymore.” Anger welled up culling the deep rooted feeling of pain. He wanted to yell at him. He wanted to throw a punch at someone. Hitoshi’s jaw set in a look of anger. “Would it be so bad if I found someone who didn’t need shit from me?”

“I… ‘Toshi I’m just trying to look out for you.” Denki glared at Bakugou as the other blond smirked. “I hate you.”

“You heard him. Try not to let the door skin your ass on the way out.” Bakugou laughed. He kicked the door shut the second he managed to force Denki out. “Is he seriously that far up your ass?”

“You have no idea. He still tries to do my laundry and cook for me. He’s a terrible cook. I don’t need him doing any of that. I can do it myself.” Hitoshi groaned as he was finally served a bowl of nasty looking slop. Probably not the prettiest batch Bakugou had ever made, but it tasted pretty damn good. “I might have to actually suck your dick. You’re an amazing cook.”

“Told you. I’m the fucking best.” Bakugou cackled.

It was easy to pretend that the rest of the world wasn’t existent and he didn’t have to deal with the war zone that was about to be the conversation after he got home. Denki could wait a little longer. Hitoshi glanced at his phone as it buzzed. He frowned as he realized he was being called in on his day off. “I gotta shower here. You got anything that’ll fit me?”

“Fucking why?” Bakugou pulled a face looking a lot annoyed then he sounded. Or maybe Hitoshi was just getting used to the asshole personality.

“I’m getting called in early. I don’t know if it’s local. I’ll be radio silent for a few days at least. We’ll go drinking when I get back. My treat for borrowing your clothes.” Hitoshi quickly swallowed down the rest of his meal setting the bowl down. Bakugou despite the bitching handed over some clothes and showed him how his excessively fancy shower worked.

Even after he’d charged his phone Hitoshi told Bakugou to say nothing to Denki. He did what he said. He went radio silent. Hitoshi faded into the darkness of another city chasing ghosts and liars. He’d learned enough from his father to sift through the mud and shit. It was easy to follow a lead once someone slipped up for a fraction of a second.

He’d learned a lot from Aizawa when it came to gathering intel and stalking suspects. He kept his phone off in a case designed to keep it from pinging towers. At least for now. The news on the shitty tv in his grungy hotel room highlighted everyday hero achievements. Nothing out of the ordinary that sparked interest. So he waited and watched. He took his time in securing a location and when he finally took his shot two weeks later there wasn’t a hitch. He’d cornered the bastard just like Aizawa had taught him and his catch was turned over the the commission without fanfare.

Hitoshi had too much time to think on his mission. Too many thoughts streaming through his mind when he finally had silence instead of Denki or Tetsu filling his ears. His jaw set as he opened his front door when he finally made it home and it didn’t feel quite so lonely in the silence. Hitoshi chuckled to himself throwing his keys on the counter. Denki’s schedule was on the fridge so when Hitoshi left long enough to buy a stack of boxes it wasn’t special.

Packing up his shit wasn’t special. Taking down his photos wasn’t special. His hands hesitated when it came to the graduation photo of him and Denki. Hitoshi dropped it into the kitchen trash after staring at it for a few minutes. He was taping up the last of the boxes when Denki burst into his room. The brilliant smile on his face broke as the blond looked at the boxes and Hitoshi finished taping the last one.

“I’m moving out.” Hitoshi didn’t leave room for argument. He’d asked his agency to fix him up with a place and they delivered before he even got back into town. The small mercies in life he supposed.

“You’re… ‘Toshi! You disappear without a trace and won’t even text me back. Now you’re telling me that you’re just moving out?” Denki looked upset and all Hitoshi could feel was numbness. “Why?”

“Because I don’t feel like listening anymore. I don’t want to sit here and subject myself to one of my friends fucking someone I used to love. I might fucking hate myself, but I’m not that much of a masochist. I’d rather get drunk and fuck Bakugou a hundred times than listen to all that shit.” Hitoshi didn’t bother looking at Denki as he checked that the moving truck he’d ordered was parked in a decent spot. He didn’t say anything else. He packed his shit down with the guy from the moving company and pretended that it wasn’t going to hurt later. It was better than suffering.

The place was a wreck. The flooring smelled weird and there were stains on the walls. The floorboards creaked, but the place was clean outside of the evidence of wear. The whole building looked on the verge of being condemned. It was a perfect place to hide from the world unnoticed. He dropped down on his mattress once he’d put together his bed frame and stared at the ceiling.

Hitoshi sighed. He didn’t even have food in the fridge. Grabbing his phone he ignored the twenty texts from Denki opening up his messages from Bakugou.

Me: Got my own place. Bring me groceries or something fucker.
BakuHo: Learn to cook.
BakuHo: Send me your location.
You shared your location.

It was probably an hour after he casually texted Bakugou and let him know the apartment number that he heard a knock at the door. The rickety thing creaked as it opened and Bakugou made a face at him as he shouldered his way inside. At least he wasn’t about to start some shit over something this small.

“Place smells horrible. Open a fucking window.” Bakugou growled dropping a few grocery bags on the counter before he started opening every window. “Where the fuck did you even find this place?”

“Agency,” Hitoshi grumbled looking through the bags. “This was what they could do with how soon I asked for a place.”

“Finally got tired of taking it and moved out?” Bakugou snorted as he grabbed a bottle out of one of the bags. “You didn’t need him anyways.”

“He won’t stop texting me. I’m not sure if I should answer him or not.” Hitoshi sat on the floor and considered getting a couch for a moment. He had enough money laying around to buy furniture.

“You don’t have dishes. How the fuck are you supposed to even survive without dishes?” Bakugou kicked him in the leg as he sat down next to him screwing the top off of the liquor bottle.

“All the furniture was Denki’s from his family. Bedroom shit was all mine though.” Hitoshi mumbled taking the bottle from him.

“You’re such a bitch. We’re ordering you some fucking furniture. I’m not going to come over to sit on your nasty ass floor.” Bakugou was snarling at him and Hitoshi just gave him a sarcastic grin. “You got internet at least?”

“Yeah.” Hitoshi took a swig before handing Bakugou the bottle so he could look for his laptop. They spent the better part of the next two hours bitching each other out over furniture and dishes while Bakugou shot down anything Hitoshi found amusing enough to want until the online cart was full of monochrome with the occasional ‘pop of color’ as the blond described it.

“Why the fuck are you good at this?” Hitoshi grumbled as he swirled the bottle realizing they’d gone through half of it already and his whole life was swaying on a ship in some sort of fucked up metaphorical way.

Bakugou gave him an annoyed glare. “My parents are fashion designers. If I didn’t know how to do this kind of thing they’d disown me.”

Hitoshi set his laptop aside staring up at the ceiling. “I probably hurt him. I want to feel bad about it, but it’s just not possible anymore. I think I’m fundamentally broken at this point.”

“Kirishima thinks we’re actually fucking. You should have seen his face. He acted like I’d just committed the worst crime known to man.” Bakugou rolled slightly until he threw a leg over Hitoshi’s hip settling down over him. “Fucker punched me over it. Then had the audacity to ask me over like it was an apology or some shit.”

“You deserved it. You’re always starting shit with people.” Hitoshi snorted as he looked up at him in the awkward dull light of the room. “I’d punch you just because you’re breathing if you didn’t just bring me groceries and pick out my furniture.”

“I don’t hate you. You’re just an annoying bitch.” Bakugou snorted taking another gulp out of the bottle before setting it aside. “I don’t get him.”

“He’s still in love with you. He’s just lying to himself and trying to take you down with him.” He snorted watching the blond’s quiet expression. They both knew how that shit felt. Someone dragging them by the leash just to pull tight enough it cut off the air. Hitoshi settled his hands on Bakugou’s thighs feeling his head being quiet for the first time in months. No Denki. No Tetsu. No one. Just silence.

“You’re thinking too much.” Bakugou shoved his face until Hitoshi’s cheek was pressed into the floor. “I’m helping you clean this shit in the morning. Furniture is gonna be here and I can’t picture you knowing how to use a screwdriver.”

“Is this you being nice to me?” Hitoshi shoved his hand away with a lazy grin.

Bakugou sucked his teeth and sneered. “Would you rather I burn it all down?”

“Might be fun. I’ve never sat in a burning building before.” It sounded a lot less like a joke than he’d intended it to be. Bakugou’s eyes suddenly sharpened as they looked over his face before he frowned when Hitoshi started laughing.

“You’re fucking mental.” Bakugou moved to grab his arm awkwardly helping him up. They opened the closet and the bathroom before they found the bedroom. The blond shoved him on the bed jerking his shirt off over his head throwing it on the ground before throwing his own into the pitiful pile.

Hitoshi didn’t fall asleep until after Bakugou. He’d nearly sobered up by the time he finally did manage. The bed was still warm when he woke up. When Bakugou had gotten so comfortable sharing his space he wasn’t so sure, but the blond had a pot of miso soup on the stove and had a neatly stacked pile of dish boxes he’d flattened for recycling.

It wasn’t like the mornings he woke up waiting to leave his room trying to figure out if he wanted to deal with Denki at all. Instead, it was a bitchy blond in his kitchen aggressively scrubbing his counters and the smell of cleaner. Hitoshi leaned against the wall ignoring the ache in his head. “You don’t have to do all of that?”

“It’s fucking gross.” Bakugou turned his head to glare at him. “You might get off living like this, but I’m not going to come over and look at it.”

“What? Want a key?” Hitoshi chuckled. He opened up one of the drawers tossing his spare onto the clean counter just to irritate Bakugou. “Not like I’d have anyone else to share it with.”

“Denki texted me last night.” Bakugou shook his head. He tossed his phone on the counter. “I’m not gonna ask, but you need to figure out what the fuck he’s going on about.”

SparkPlug: Hitoshi moved out. I haven’t been able to get ahold of him. I know you’re probably mad and I’m being an asshole.
SparkPlug: I get it. I’m being insane right now, but there’s a lot of shit about ‘Toshi you don’t know.
SparkPlug: If you hear from him I need you to tell me. I just need to know he’s okay.
SparkPlug: Bakugou?
SparkPlug: Dude. This is really important. I’m sorry I was a dick.

Hitoshi stared down at the texts for a bit before he scoffed. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I’m not. Furniture is supposed to be here in thirty.” Bakugou shoved his phone back into his pocket. The blond watched him for a moment before shaking his head.

“Stop staring at me dickhead,” Hitoshi mumbled getting himself a bowl of soup. “You any good with putting shit together?”

“Better than you.” Bakugou sneered. It was easy to start bickering with him. The insults weren’t meant to hurt and when the furniture was delivered it was funny to see how many screws he could throw at the blond before Bakugou tackled him.

When it was finished it was strange to think that a few pieces of furniture and new light bulbs could make his new apartment seem almost livable. Bakugou complained loudly when he had to leave about having to take a shower at work since Hitoshi’s bathroom still smelled like a barn.

Then it was silence. Comfortable. Terrible. Silence.

Hitoshi’s phone rang and he glanced at the caller ID before sending it to voicemail. He had about ten minutes of bliss before his phone chimed. His stomach sank as he stared at the text.

Dadzawa: Come home.

—————

Hitoshi found himself staring at old family photos as he sipped at his cup of coffee. Neither of them had said anything past hello when he’d made the trip across town. It was awkward. Like he’d stepped on one of the cats and lied about it. Hitoshi finally gave in to the silent stare. “Denki called. Didn’t he?”

“He did. I don’t put a lot of stock in what he has to say when it comes to you since you’re no longer dating, but I do have to ask. Do I need to make calls?” Aizawa said it so easily. He asked as if it were any other question and Hitoshi found himself settling in a chair across from his father in the kitchen. The table between them groaning at the weight of his elbows resting on it.

“No. I’m okay. Just been drinking a lot. Denki pissed me off so I didn’t tell him I was being called out undercover.” Hitoshi mumbled taking another sip from his mug.

“I’m not going to get more involved then I need to ‘Toshi. You’re an adult, but I don’t want to get that call again. I didn’t notice how bad you were doing the first time.” Aizawa reached across the table settling a hand on his like a familiar weight. “We deal with shit they will never understand and no one knows how fast it can go wrong.”

“It’s not work. I’m just tired. I’m so fucking tired.” Hitoshi settled his cup on the table pulling his hand away to bury his face in both of them. “I just want to be alone, but it makes it so much worse. Denki trying to make sure I’m okay makes it worse. I fucked him up. I fucked up. I fucked up so bad.”

Hitoshi barely registered Aizawa moving until he was pulled up into a tight hug. His father wasn’t one for great displays of affection. His breath shuddered as he started sobbing. He couldn’t string together two words with how hard he cried. His head was killing him and his lungs ached, but Aizawa held him steadfast despite his breakdown.

“I know, kiddo. I know.” Aizawa rubbed his back slowly. “Hitoshi, you didn’t fuck anything up. You can’t stop being the way you are any more than I can stop being the way I am. Denki’s worried, but no matter how much anyone tells him to stop I doubt he ever will. You scared the shit out of him.”

“I wasn't even trying to kill myself that time. I just fucked up my meds.” Hitoshi laughed weakly as he wiped at his eyes. “It’s not worth the effort to try anymore.”

“Best way to survive when you’re this low is get tired of trying to end it.” Aizawa ruffled his hair. “Are you taking them?”

“No. I haven’t been. Papa’s not here to lecture me so… don’t tell him?” Hitoshi looked away. It was a pointless request. Hizashi always found out.

“I’m not going to force you to do anything. The door is always open, but you need to put space between yourself and Denki. You’re not going to get any better if he’s trying to manage things out of his control.” Aizawa pointed out as they sat back down.

“I moved out finally.” Hitoshi mumbled. “Place is a shithole, but Bakugou came over and helped me straighten it up.”

“He’s a good kid. Feral little bastard, but he’s a decent kid.” Aizawa said offhandedly. “I’m a little surprised you two are talking.”

“We’ve always talked. Just not as much.” Hitoshi shrugged. “He doesn’t ask questions. We just drink and do stupid shit and it’s easier than having to think for a little while. I know it’s not a good way to deal with my shit, but right now it’s enough. I’m not ready to do anything else.”

“You’re a smart person, kiddo. You’ll know when your ready to do something more. Since you have your own apartment you should get a pet.” His father looked over at one of the many cats that roamed the house before staring at Hitoshi. “They’re good for a lot more than being cute.”

“Do you think I’ll ever be okay?” Hitoshi leaned down wiggling his fingers until the small white cat came over to butt her head against his palm with a purr.

“No. But it gets easier.” Aizawa sighed. “People can’t fix you. It’s not their job. The harder they try the more they break. Hizashi learned that the hard way. He learned to just listen and let me process on my own. We both lost a lot, but he was able to bounce back a lot easier than I was. Some people are just like that.”

Hitoshi stared down at the cat lost in his own thoughts for a while. After a while he took a deep breath. “I’m not ready to do anything yet. I just need to… figure shit out a little longer. I might get a cat. Bakugou has a cat.”

“What’s it named? Murder paws?” Aizawa chuckled.

“Miyu.” Hitoshi shrugged. He glanced at his father as Aizawa furrowed his brows. “What?”

“Just surprised. That wasn’t the kind of name I expected. When did he get her?” Aizawa took a sip after giving a low chuckle.

“After he and Kirishima split.” Hitoshi leaned back in his seat. “Where’s a good place to get a cat?”

“There’s a rescue down the road. Hizashi tried to hide it from me for a while because we have enough cats. I’ll drive you since you’d have to pick up a few things for it.” Aizawa stood up downing the last of his coffee.

“You just want a reason to play with cats when Papa can’t see you wanting to adopt another one.” Hitoshi gave him a lopsided grin. “Let’s adopt two.”

Aizawa had to help him put together the cat tree when they finally made it back to his apartment. It was confusing and his dad knew more about cat furniture than he did. Maybe because he’d wanted something large enough to keep the cat entertained if he had to be away for a while. They drank coffee and his father made small comments about this and that. Nothing that really mattered, but it was the best thing he could have asked for.

The hair on the back of his neck rose when Aizawa opened one of the cabinets pulling down a bottle of something Bakugou had brought. He watched him swish it around and examine the label. Hitoshi cleared his throat. “Housewarming present.”

“It’s good stuff. I’m glad you weren’t drinking alone. It’s too easy to get lost in your head if you’re alone.” Aizawa hummed putting it back. The comment was small, but in its own way supportive. “Don’t tell Hizashi we got another cat. I want to see how long it takes him to notice.”

“He’s going to kick your ass.” Hitoshi started laughing. “How’s Eri doing?”

“She wants you to come for dinner soon. I told her you’d come when our work schedules line up.” Aizawa hummed as he checked the time. “Call me if you need something. You know I don’t sleep much. I gotta get back before I miss dinner.”

“Yeah. I’ll do that. Thanks for all of this.” Hitoshi smiled, but it felt empty. Even as Aizawa ruffled his hair before he left it felt empty and alone again.

BakuHo: I’m coming over.
Me: Fuck up at work?
BakuHo: Fuck you. I always catch my villain.
BakuHo: I’m exhausted and I want my dick sucked. Trade me for dinner.
Me: That line actually work on people?
BakuHo: You’re not a person. You’re an advertisement for condoms.
Me: You’re a bitch.
BakuHo: A bitch that’s getting their dick sucked. I’m making hot pot.
Me: So we’re talking balls and shaft. If you want me to eat ass you’re bringing me beer.
BakuHo: I have a bottle of scotch I got from some extra they pulled international. Best you’re gonna get.
Me: Deal.

Hitoshi deeply considered saying it was a joke. It was a joke, but if anyone was going to knock his brain out of his head for a while it was Bakugou and he wasn’t about to pass up the opportunity. Rolling his eyes he looked over at the kitten perched on his couch. “What?”

When his handle rattled Hitoshi didn’t bother looking up from the kitten as he waved the cat toy around again watching the little ball of energy attempting to catch it. The thud of shoes hitting the floor was almost familiar at this point. His door closed hard and the entire apartment went still.

“You got a cat?” Bakugou sounded confused. Hitoshi turned his face not expecting the expression on the blond's face. The man was throwing his jacket on the coat hook and quickly walking over to sit next to him. Hitoshi found himself trying not to smile. “Where’d you get it?”

The black kitten latched onto Bakugou’s hand chewing on his knuckle as his little legs kicked ferociously. Hitoshi finally grinned. “Dad has a rescue down the road so we went and got two cats. Papa is gonna be pissed when he figures out there’s a new one at home.”

“That’s gonna be funny as hell. Name it yet?” Bakugou gripped the kitten gently shaking it on the couch. He looked at ease instead of creasing his features with a snarl. It was like observing an alien instead of the same guy he’d gone to school with. “They’re pretty cute.”

“Call something cute again and I might puke. I haven’t picked one yet.” Hitoshi dropped his head onto Bakugou’s shoulder with a sigh. “Denki called my fucking dad so I had to go over and even he basically said Denki needs to chill out.”

“That’s because the fucker doesn’t think you’re capable of handling shit.” Bakugou muttered. “Name her Rin.”

“You just like naming cats.” Hitoshi snorted after a moment. “I like it. We still doing hot pot or am I trading food for choking on your dick?”

“You have a cat. You can suck my dick later.” Bakugou sneered as he kept messing with the kitten. They just sat there playing with the kitten until it started yawning and Bakugou finally started to move. Hitoshi jolted as he realized he’d nearly fallen asleep. “You look like shit.”

“Long day.” Hitoshi grumbled picking up the kitten to tuck her into the little bed he’d shoved into one of the hidden sections of the cat tree. She looked confused for a moment before she curled up and started snoring quietly. “I should get a tv or something.”

“It’s fine without one. Reading is better. I got tired of all the shit movies always playing back when we lived in dorms.” The blond was already in the kitchen starting up the stove and cutting up ingredients. “Hand me the nakiri.”

“The what?” Hitoshi looked around trying to figure out what he was talking about as Bakugou reached over jerking a knife out of the block holding it up to his face. “Uh. It’s a knife?”

“This is a nakiri. It’s not for chopping bones.” Bakugou pulled a face and started slicing up vegetables with enough precision it had Hitoshi staring. “Grab the tofu and mushrooms. I wasn’t sure what kind you liked so I got a few different kinds.”

Hitoshi started pulling things out of the grocery bags Bakugou had brought over in a huff. The package of tofu was snatched out of his hand and opened up quick enough it was frightening in its own impressive way. The man barely looked at his hands. He found himself leaning against the counter handing over ingredients while the blond bitched about a petty thief he’d dealt with on patrol and it was strangely domestic in a way.

They hadn’t spent a lot of time together sober. Bakugou was smart and precise. He’d always known that, but the man was unapologetically himself no matter the situation. He made his own space where he didn’t have any and made sure he was exactly where he wanted to be no matter what. It was impressive in a fucked up asshole kind of way.

His phone chimed and Hitoshi walked over to the charger where he’d plugged it in. He felt his shoulders sag before he even finished reading the text. His phone was jerked out of his hand and slapped back down on the counter. Turning his head he took in the angry expression on Bakugou’s face. “What?”

“Stop encouraging him.” Bakugou shoved the phone away until it knocked into the wall out of reach down the counter. He sucked his teeth and went back to cutting things up.

Hitoshi glanced at the phone for a moment as the words settled in. Bakugou was right. Maybe he was encouraging Denki. “What do I do instead?”

“Eat hot pot with me.” Bakugou glanced over his shoulder still looking irritated. “Fucking dumbass.”

“I need a drink.” Hitoshi groaned turning to lean back against the counter as he rubbed his face.

“Need or want?” The blond raised a brow at him. It took a moment for Hitoshi to process the question. It wasn’t a question. It was a reality check in the form of a question.

“I want one. I don’t want to deal with that shit just yet and if I’m still sober I’m going to want to text him back because I’m a fucking dumbass.” Hitoshi finally glared at him once he’d logically sorted out the question based on his current needs rather than everything else.

“Pour me one. I could use one too.” His answer must have been satisfactory if the bastard wanted a drink too. Bakugou kept cooking as Hitoshi gathered the bottle and a couple glasses handing one over. After a sip Bakugou made a face. “That’s fucking horrible.”

“It suits you.” Hitoshi smirked over his cup until the knife was pointed right at his face. They stared each other down for a few more seconds before they started to laugh and Bakugou began barking orders around the kitchen giving his hands something to do while they drank and talked about stupid shit. Shit like Bakugou getting a bird stuck in his hair during an interview or Hitoshi recently tripping himself with his capture tool leaving a briefing. Inconsequential things that passed the time.

They had dinner together and as simple as it was to just eat with someone Hitoshi felt better than he had in months. He must have stopped talking because Bakugou was staring at him. “Sorry. Just… lost my train of thought.”

Bakugou cocked a brow at him. “Don’t apologize for it.”

“Habit. Silence makes people uncomfortable.” Hitoshi shrugged.

“Yeah, well I’m not most people. I don’t give a shit if you’re quiet.” Bakugou grumbled finishing off his bowl and knocking back the last of his glass. “I’m tired. Let’s go to bed.”

“Since when do you have a standing invitation to my bed?” Hitoshi shot him a frown.

“Since your ass can’t figure out the word no.” The blond grabbed a handful of his hair tugging it hard enough to jerk his head, but not enough that it hurt. Hitoshi rolled his eyes finishing his bowl so they could clean up. Bakugou made himself comfortable in a way that raised questions. Had he been like this with everyone or just people he was close to? Like Kirishima.

There wasn’t much to it, but it still had the hairs on the back of his neck standing on end as he changed into a pair of sleep pants and snorted out a laugh when Bakugou shot him an offended look being offered a pair. The blond just stripped down to his boxers and dropped into the bed like he belonged there. Hitoshi flicked off the light before climbing into bed on the opposite side ready to stare at the wall for hours.

“You’re thinking too much.” Bakugou dragged him back into his chest as Hitoshi grunted with the force of it. The other man had an iron hold around his waist as he made himself comfortable and Hitoshi was greeted a few moments later with a quiet snore beside his ear.

It must have been nice to sleep so easily. Hitoshi had never been the smaller spoon, but now he could understand why Denki had always insisted as the warmth quickly made his eyes feel heavy. He barely managed to finish another thought before he was completely out.

Waking up without a real hangover was different. Feeling someone holding onto him was even more different. Bakugou had his face buried against the nape of his neck still snoring away as birds began to chirp. For once waking up didn’t feel so difficult. Hitoshi sighed quietly as he carefully extracted himself from the bed glancing back at the sleeping blond.

He must have a thing for blonds. Bakugou in the early morning light as it filtered through the window over his skin looked beautiful. His features not pulled into a scowl or pinched in frustration were elegant without another way to describe them. His red eyes might have been striking, but the way he looked laying in his bed made some part of him ache to touch him. Hitoshi clenched his jaw as he left the room feeling confusion settling over him. How the fuck was he supposed to process that line of thought?

He started cooking after following the bare basics of self care. He carefully fried rice and chopped the ingredients he added. They weren’t even and the whole dish looked awkward and unappealing. It wasn’t the best he could possibly do and it irritated him. Bakugou cooked so effortlessly. He did everything effortlessly and it left him jealous of how easy everything seemed for him.

Deep down he knew it wasn’t. He’d seen Bakugou fight tooth and nail to be better than everyone around them. Always pushing himself while it took other people shoving him in the right direction for Hitoshi to finally try to step into the shoes of a hero. He startled feeling an arm wrap around him.

Bakugou settled his chin on his shoulder with a sleepy grunt even as he pressed his nose just below his ear in a way that made Hitoshi’s heart stutter for a moment. The blonds voice was rough and low when he finally spoke. “I’ll have to teach you how to chop properly. It smells good.”

Hitoshi shuddered feeling his lips against his skin as he turned off the stove to look at him. His eyes searching Bakugou’s face for a while before he turned back. He wasn’t going to do anything about it. He wasn’t willing to try and fuck someone else up being selfish.

His eyes shot wide as Bakugou grabbed a handful of hair jerking his head back. “I’m complimenting you. Pay attention to me mindfuck.”

“I’m paying attention. I just have stuff on the stove and I’m starving.” Hitoshi mumbled. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t ruin something he barely had. “Why are you being so nice to me?”

“Maybe I like having you around. It’s one of the least annoying things I’ve had in my life for a while.” The blond dragged him back in holding him tight as he let his head rest on Hitoshi’s shoulder. “I don’t pity you or some fucked shit. I’m not going to hold you with kid gloves.”

“If you did I’d probably ask you to walk into traffic.” Hitoshi huffed.

“You cry. In your sleep. Did you know that?” Bakugou’s voice was barely loud enough to meet his ears. Hitoshi could feel all of the light in his mind plunge back into the dark, twisting itself back into the endless cage it kept itself in. “I didn’t know if I should wake you. So I just kept you close.”

“Thanks, I guess.” It was embarrassing and Hitoshi forced himself away to pull down bowls for the meal offering a bowl to Bakugou that was quickly filled. “Are you busy today?”

“I’m having lunch with Kirishima later. It’ll probably be a shit show, but I’m not going to agree and bail on him. I’m not that kind of guy.” Bakugou watched him for a moment before finding a seat on the couch to eat. “What about you?”

“Night patrol. Can you feed Rin? I’ll buy her an automatic feeder soon. It might be useful.” Hitoshi found himself feeling petty. He wanted to bitch Bakugou out like the blond had done for him when it came to Denki. Except, Bakugou was a grown man with enough sense to hold himself back where it mattered most times. He wasn’t going to bring up that meeting with their friend was a bad idea.

“I can do that.” The blond grumbled as he worked his way through their meal and checked the time. “I should probably get back to my place and get cleaned up.”

Stay.

He kept control of himself. He wasn’t going to beg out of loneliness. The apartment felt too empty. His life felt empty at the thought of being left behind for someone the blond constantly tore himself apart over. “Sounds like a good idea.”

When Bakugou finally left he was alone with his thoughts. No Denki to push his mind one way or another trying to avoid annoyance. He didn’t hate him. He knew he’d never hate Denki. No matter how petty or angry he was there wasn’t a way to keep Denki out of his life. They were friends. A friend that he needed more space from. He’d thrown away their photos and it killed part of him.

He wasn’t about to go running back to him. He’d done more damage. No matter how much he threw shit in the path of Denki’s life he seemed to bounce back with a smile on his face. Hitoshi leaned back on the couch staring at the ceiling until Rin scrambled up onto the couch to perch on his leg with a meow.

“I’m a mess. You’re lucky you don’t have to worry about any of the things I do.” Hitoshi mumbled scratching behind her ear as the kitten began to purr.

He checked his phone despite his better judgment and stared at the messages. Even if he wanted to delete them he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

Denki: I’m sorry.
Denki: I thought that what I’ve been doing was okay with you. I thought we were on the same page with our breakup.
Denki: I didn’t realize I was pushing you that hard and I’m sorry.
Denki: Toshi you’re really important to me even if we aren’t together anymore. We’re best friends, right?
Denki: It wasn’t right for me to flip out over you seeing Bakugou, but some of the stuff he’s been doing is messed up.

Hitoshi stared at the messages for a long while before finally typing things out.

Me: I don’t know if you ever talked to Bakugou about his side of the story, but Kirishima wasn’t in the right either.
Me: You don’t have a right to get pissed off or any of that shit if I’m seeing him.

Hitoshi let out a slow breath feeling heaviness settling into his chest. Why did this have to be a text conversation? This was stupid.

Me: I’ll text you my address later. I don’t want to do this over text, but we need to talk.

Why he had to pull at his own sanity he’d probably never understand, but patrol was enough to silence it for a while as he walked the rooftops in the dead of night. People slept and stayed warm in their homes while he sauntered over rooftops absently playing with his mask. The night was uneventful, but it gave him something to focus on until the early morning light started peeking up over the roofs. His agency called his shifts and after he reported in. He changed and walked instead of taking public transportation back to the shoddy apartment building.

It was empty in his apartment and Hitoshi made himself busy preparing instant noodles and washed it down with cheap beer. He was exhausted and his mind felt strained as he dropped himself into bed. Bakugou hadn’t texted him. He hadn’t posted on social media. No publicity for the day. Nothing.

He buried his face in his pillow trying to sleep, but it was so much harder being alone. There were too many thoughts clouding his head all at once to be able to focus. When he did finally fall asleep it was as if he hadn’t. His body felt heavy and he struggled to preform basic self care. He settled into a bath once Rin had eaten and he’d ignored his stomach entirely in exchange for hot water and relative silence.

Denki: Is it a good time?

Hitoshi stared at the message for a long while before making up his mind. It wasn’t worth it ignoring it.

You sent your location.
Me: Unit 201.

His work schedule was likely to keep being spotty since they often used him for days at a time on tracking missions lately. The sporadic schedule was irritating when he just wanted something useful to do. So he waited instead of mulled over his shitty choices.

Denki had a box of cake in his hand when he showed up. Alone. No Tetsu at his heels. Hitoshi stepped aside to let him in and locked the door behind him. He tried to keep himself steady when he finally said something. “I was out of line. So were you when you showed up at Bakugou’s place like a jealous boyfriend.”

“I… I know that. It wasn’t fair to you or to him. I’m having a hard time with the idea of you actually seeing someone. Maybe if it wasn’t Bakugou it would be easier, but he’s so destructive it worries me.” Denki set the cake on the coffee table taking a seat on the couch. He gave it a pat and despite the urge to keep space Hitoshi found himself sitting down.

“He’s a really good person. We’ve all been friends for a long time, but I didn’t get to know him until now. I’m an adult Denki. I can make my own shitty choices.” Hitoshi sighed leaning back on the couch. His mind felt numb and maybe he should have suggested a coffee shop or something more neutral. “You don’t get to try to protect me from other people.”

“It’s not like that. I don’t want it to seem like that, but you have this habit of ignoring yourself until you start breaking down. It was really hard to see when we were dating. I’d keep trying and you just shut down and kept me at an arms length all the time.” Denki stared down at the floor with a quiet sigh. “I hurt you.”

“You’ve been hurting me. Tetsu was one of my best friends and it hurt more than you could possibly imagine when you two started seeing each other. I want you to be happy, but that was pretty fucked up.” Hitoshi found himself frowning as he looked at Denki. “I was out of line for what I said, but you’ve known I’m right here and you just chose to ignore the fact it could possibly bother me that you were fucking my best friend.”

Denki fiddled with his fingers as he sat quietly. He slowly nodded meeting Hitoshi’s eyes. “I’m sorry. It wasn’t even intentional. We started seeing each other and I told Tetsu it would be fine. It just sort of kept going and you never said anything so I figured you were fine with it.”

“It’s easy to assume if you never ask.” Hitoshi twitched feeling a damp nose brush his fingers. Rin crawled into his lap making herself comfortable. “You treat me like I’m fragile, but you also do selfish shit right in front of me ignoring the fact that maybe I’m still working through the way we broke up. I don’t have a right to be angry with you for trying to be happy so I moved out.”

“‘Toshi you stopped taking to me for days on end. You wouldn’t even look at me. Do you have any idea how scary that is after you tried to kill yourself?” Denki frowned at him. The blond shook his head and looked down at Rin. “You got a cat.”

“Dad helped me pick her out. You calling my dad was really shitty, Denks. I get you’re worried about me, but I’m handling it. I didn’t try to kill myself. I fucked up my medication. I got disoriented and knocked the bottle over because I accidentally took a double dose and didn’t realize it.” As angry as he was with how the conversation was going he at least owed Denki that explanation. He didn’t need to give him anything else.

“Then why didn’t you tell me?” Denki snapped at him. “All of this could have been avoided if you just talked to me!”

“Because you don’t listen.” The answer must have blindsided Denki because the look of shock on his face satisfied some part of him while guilt filled him. “You start moving before you even try to listen.”

“You never gave me a chance to try!” Denki stood up grabbing his jacket. “You know I’m trying. I’m scared you’re going to hurt yourself, but I can’t keep doing this either.”

“Then don’t.” Hitoshi felt a chill go down his spine as his door slammed shut starling Rin away. The way Bakugou had said it was filled with enough venom his blood felt like ice. “I think the conversation might be done. Go home, Denki. We might be friends, but you’re starting to push the wrong buttons.”

Denki glanced at Hitoshi as Bakugou stalked closer. He was staring up at him while Hitoshi was trying to analyze the situation. Maybe he should step in, but maybe he should just leave them to argue?

“I…” Denki started before flinching back as Bakugou leaned closer pulling his lips back in a snarl.

“Fuck off. Get out. Leave my fucking boyfriend alone.” Bakugou hissed at the smaller blond. He stood there watching Denki gather his shoes and didn’t look at Hitoshi until the door closed behind him. “You make a lot of shit decisions, but letting him come over was probably one of the worst ones.”

“I realize that. I wanted to try to sort out some stuff, but it just felt like a broken record.” Hitoshi sighed. After a moment he gave Bakugou a grin. “Boyfriend? You know people are gonna lose their shit if they hear that one.”

“Like I give a fuck. They don’t need to know anything. If it gets Denki to fuck off for a bit so you can deal with shit then who cares.” Bakugou grumbled picking up Rin as she skittered past him. “Besides maybe it’ll give them something to argue over about during the wedding rehearsal. Kirishima wanted me to be his best man.”

“You’re joking? He realizes that he broke up with you, right?” Hitoshi felt more confused than he had trying to logically sort through what just happened with the sideways conversation he’d had with Denki.

“He’s still my best friend. I fucked up his engagement party. I at least owe him something.” Bakugou sat beside him playing with the kittens belly. “Lunch with him wasn’t that bad. We talked about a lot of shit. He admitted we were both wrong with how things ended up and it was weird. I’m not really sure how I feel about it.”

“I told you. He’s still in love with you.” Hitoshi found himself hating the words he was saying. Why the fuck did he hate the thought so much?

“It wouldn’t matter if he was. He’s with someone and I don’t think I’d be able to trust him again.” Bakugou set Rin aside shifting his body until he was straddling Hitoshi’s lap with a smirk. “I don’t need him.”

“Let’s go out. Bar or club? Your choice. But I don’t want to be home right now.” Hitoshi pinched Bakugou’s side hard enough the blond punched his arm.

“Ow. Fucker.” Bakugou was glaring at him again and Hitoshi found himself smiling. “Let’s go to a club. There’s a gay club in the next district that isn’t totally shit.”

————

It turned out Bakugou had stashed a bag of his clothes at the back of his closet. The blond had just told him that he didn’t always want to have to run home to change for something if he was trying to catch a little extra sleep when he was over. Still, Bakugou had helped him dress up in something that was decent enough to go out in.

They’d already ordered shots from up in the VIP section which Hitoshi hadn’t expected, but apparently being a pro hero meant they got a few extra perks. Sort of like they got to buy alcohol after eighteen unlike most of the people their age. It was a strange sort of mind fuck.

The blond was an incredibly good dancer and it took a couple more shots before Hitoshi even thought about throwing caution to the wind. He worked in the dark for a reason. Being next to Bakugou listening to him laugh and yell just over the music so they could hear each other put him at ease. He’s never joined Denki on the dance floor, but he could see the appeal.

It was sweltering hot in the building and the bass was rattling his brain. The faint haze of alcohol and the feeling of Bakugou at his back as he was pulled back against him fit into something like a fever dream. It felt good. All of it felt right just letting himself live in the moment. For someone as strict and rigid as Bakugou it was almost contrary that he just let himself go. Hitoshi sucked in a breath feeling his hips being pulled back harder. His hand snapping up to grab a handful of blond hair.

Hitoshi let his eyes fall shut for a moment as he tilted his head. If they were just going out for fun then the least he could do is go with whatever impulsive thought filled his head. It was the teeth that made him gasp. His eyes snapped wide as Bakugou dragged him back harder rolling his hips against his ass like he owned him. Hitoshi’s voice caught in his throat as the blond ran a tongue over the mark he’d made.

Fuck it.

Hitoshi pulled himself free of Bakugou long enough to grab handfuls of his shirt pulling him down the two inch difference between him. There wasn’t a second of hesitation. He expected Bakugou to pull away or at least pause, but a handful of his hair was gripped tight enough to force a gasp out of him. Bakugou bit his lip hard enough Hitoshi hissed at him. The smile he felt made him want to laugh as he pulled back.

He didn’t laugh. His body felt like someone had poured instant cement over his entire frame. When Bakugou gave him a confused look the blond turned his head trying to piece together what had distracted him. “Motherfucker. Ignore him.”

Hitoshi looked away from where Kirishima was sitting with his fiancé. Bakugou had a point. He had no intention of even talking to Kirishima considering he was being an asshole to Bakugou even thinking of asking him to be his best man. Hitoshi grabbed a fistful of blond pulling him back down into a kiss. They went out for them. Not anyone else.

Bakugou was rough with how he kissed. He didn’t leave room for Hitoshi to take control like he normally did with someone else. Hitoshi groaned feeling Bakugou dragging him closer with his hands settled on his ass digging fingers into muscle when he finally opened his mouth. If it was the alcohol he didn’t really care because the feeling of Bakugou running his tongue over his sent a shiver across his entire body and he’d be lying to himself if he said it didn’t have his cock twitching in the pants Bakugou had picked out for him.

When Bakugou pulled back panting he had a vicious grin on his face. “Want another drink?”

“I’m buying this time.” Hitoshi grinned back letting himself be led back to their table by the hand. Even when they’d finished arguing about ordering cocktails and the fact they were stronger than shots Hitoshi was having a damn good time.

“You’re not a shitty kisser. I’m surprised.” Bakugou laughed. He had a wide grin on his face when their drinks were brought over. “What brought that on?”

“You telling me you don’t know you’re fucking hot?” Hitoshi burst into laughter almost spilling his drink. He held back long enough to take a sip and settle it back down. He pushed Bakugou’s drink back ignoring the fact the blond started cursing at him just to move himself. He sat straddling his lap with a grin as Bakugou grabbed his ass dragging him closer. “You really don’t have any shame do you?”

“Do you? You’re sitting on my dick in front of my ex.” Bakugou smirked at him. Hitoshi let himself be dragged down into another kiss ignoring anyone that might have been looking at them until he heard a camera shutter. He jerked back looking in the direction of the sound making eye contact with another man.

“Ignore it.” Bakugou grumbled pulling him closer. “Shits normal for regular pros.”

“You’re good with them plastering you on tabloids groping me in public?” Hitoshi smirked at him.

“My dick isn’t out.” Bakugou chuckled kissing his neck. Hitoshi grinned as he let his head fall back. The hand slipping up the back of his shirt might have been sweaty, but that didn’t really matter. Teeth dug into his collarbone as he tightened his knees against the blonds hips. He could feel Bakugou smiling against his skin. “Why did I know you’d be into biting?”

“Wait until I show you what I can do with my capture tool.” Hitoshi hummed as he leaned close enough to say it just loud enough for Bakugou. He felt nails drag down his back and leaned back to grab his drink taking a slow sip of it. “I kind of want to go dance again.”

“Hey! It’s been a while. It’s good seeing you Shinsou.” The voice might have sounded happy, but when both Bakugou and himself turned glares to the voice Kirishima had an awkward look on his face as his fiancé held onto his arm like some sort of leech. “I was a little surprised seeing you out. I didn’t see you as the sort of guy that went to clubs.”

“I’m trying new things,” Hitoshi smirked at him leaning into Bakugou. The blond just chuckled.

“You’re being a bitch.” Bakugou bit his ear despite the quiet statement and pulled a frown in Kirishima’s direction. “Figured I’d introduce Hitoshi to a decent club. Wasn’t expecting to run into you. I figured you’d be busy planning a wedding.”

“We’re taking a break tonight. It’s stressful.” Kirishima might have been smiling, but Hitoshi could see the tension in his neck. The way his fingers twitched absently. The faint tension in his jaw as if he were preventing himself from frowning. “I just wanted to say hi. This is Haku by the way.”

The quiet man just gave a small wave looking uncomfortable so Hitoshi pressed more buttons. He was good at it. He leaned back on Bakugou’s lap shifting his hips forward just enough to break the blonds attention on Kirishima. A smirk plastered itself on his face. “As much as we’d love to stay and chat all night I kind of planned to get shitfaced and get railed in the bathroom. The classic gay experience.”

Bakugou burst into laughter under him and Hitoshi grinned at Kirishima as the redhead began frowning. “Mindfuck has the right idea . I think we’ll pick up a bottle on the way back home though. I want to lay you out on every surface we have.”

Hitoshi sucked in a breath feeling Bakugou sliding his hands up his thighs. “We’ll catch you later.” Hitoshi grinned sliding off of Bakugou’s lap holding out a hand to the blond completely ignoring the confusion on Kirishima’s fiancé and the anger brewing in the redheads expression. “You coming, Katsuki?”

He was playing with fire and he knew it even as Bakugou took his hand. If he ignored Kirishima long enough they could make it out without any more conversation. The cold outside sucked the air out of his lungs when they’d pushed their way through the crowd leaving half finished drinks on the table. Hitoshi gave a grunt as he was pulled into the first alley and shoved against the wall.

“You… are a fucking psycho.” Bakugou seethed. His expression was harsh for a moment before he started to laugh. The blond dropped his head onto his shoulder shaking with laughter. “The look on his face. That was ballsy even for you.”

“I might be picking up a few bad habits.” Hitoshi grinned. “So… did you kiss me to irritate him or was that because you were actually into it?”

“I don’t do shit I don’t mean. Let’s grab a bottle and head back to your apartment. Holy shit. I can’t believe you did that.” Bakugou chuckled standing upright. He shouldered Hitoshi after a block with a grin still on his face. Hitoshi shouldered him back hard enough to almost knock him over before taking off at a run causing a few people to shout at them in annoyance.

They might have stopped long enough to grab a bottle of whiskey, but Hitoshi could barely think about it as Bakugou shoved him up against his door. Lips pressed against his own as the blond awkwardly fiddled with the key and knob. They nearly fell when Bakugou finally managed to open it. It was like Bakugou had no intention of letting him free. He still had a hand wrapped tightly in his hair as he stumbled back. The blond kicking his door shut. Hitoshi barely got a chance to lock it.

He couldn’t help smiling into the kiss as Bakugou turned them enough that he was pulled into his lap as the blond awkwardly sat back breaking the kiss just long enough to sit down. Hitoshi grabbed the back of the couch as he straddled the blond’s lap with a smirk on his face. His head was still buzzing with alcohol and the thrill of the potentially bad decision they were making as he rolled his hips on the blonds lap pulling him into another kiss while Bakugou gasped.

The blond gripped his hips tightly as they made their own bad decisions together without thinking about the consequences. Hitoshi grunted as he was bodily flipped off Bakugou’s lap onto the couch. One of his thighs jerked up to cage Bakugou’s hip as teeth dug into his neck. His fingers grabbed fistfuls of fabric bunching up the back of Bakugou’s shirt as he tilted his head back.

His whole mind stuttered to a halt as Bakugou forcefully shifted his hips grinding into him. The hard line digging into him pulled a loud moan from him that he hadn’t expected. He moved his hands pulling Bakugou down harder as he met him halfway feeling less awkward about the fact he was hard. As the blond lifted his head Hitoshi followed the impulse as he licked a line from his throat to his jaw digging in teeth hard enough to leave a mark.

Bakugou’s hands felt hot under his shirt while Hitoshi lost himself in the chaos of it all. The sharp sting of arousal twisting through him as the blond kissed him again. They were panting hard as Hitoshi pulled him back down with each hard grind of their hips. It wasn’t about affection. It was about getting off and he was okay with it. Hitoshi threw his head back feeling tension starting to pull his body tight.

“I’m gonna cum. Oh, fuck. Harder.” Hitoshi gasped. This hadn’t been what he expected out of their trip to the club, but fuck if it wasn’t an excellent conclusion to it. He was so close. He could feel his cock throbbing as Bakugou ground their hips together. The feeling of the blond shaking over him trying to keep it together made him feel powerful. This was Bakugou Katsuki. The fact he even got this far felt like insanity.

“Gonna cum all over those nice jeans I picked out for you. Fuck. Do it. Fucking cum for me.” Bakugou snarled in his ear as he grabbed Hitoshi’s thigh pulling him up harder with each rock of his hips. His hand was hot. This was the same man that could level a building without a single hint of effort and it almost felt like he was breaking apart under him.

Hitoshi could feel his voice getting louder. He could hear himself begging for more as Bakugou dug teeth into the other side of his neck. The pitch of his tone sharper with each second until he felt something in him break. It broke like someone dropping a bottle off of a building letting it shatter to pieces. Hitoshi gasped as his hips stuttered. He’d have been embarrassed, but he couldn’t find it in him as his cock twitched hard between them spilling inside of his jeans.

Bakugou jerked away from him with a grunt barely pulling his hands away as they started to spark. “Fuck!”

There was a look of annoyance on the blonds face as he sat on his heels between Hitoshi’s thighs leaving him confused momentarily. The feeling of cum cooling in his jeans was disgusting, but he was focused on the way Bakugou was panting hard with his hands held palms up fighting for self control.

Hitoshi tried to sort through the confusion as Bakugou cursed quietly shaking his hands like it would help his body do something. It clicked after a few moments sorting through the tipsy haze. “Your quirk goes off when you orgasm.” It sounded more like a fact than a question.

“No shit. Why do you think I had to get a medical approval for quirk dampener bracelets? I only really need them with someone that…” Bakugou sighed. “I never needed them with Kirishima so I forget I need them sometimes. It kind of ruins shit.”

“I don’t want to think about him right now. I just ruined a pair of pants for you.” Hitoshi snorted. It wasn’t surprising. It was more interesting than anything. “So you can’t jerk off without them?”

Bakugou leveled him with a hard stare. “Explosive hands.”

“Think you can keep from blowing up my couch?” Hitoshi grinned at him as Bakugou moved to sit on the couch. The blond shot him a confused look for a moment. “Unless you’re not up for continuing?”

“Maybe another time. This kind of ruined it for me. I didn’t even think about this going this far.” Bakugou leaned over brushing his lips against his. “I don’t regret it. I just don’t want a pity fuck because I can’t get off without help.”

“I don’t pity you.” Hitoshi mumbled kissing him back slowly. His mind was shifting in a thousand directions at once. “Want to watch a movie? I need to shower.”

“Shitty hero movie? We can do a shot every time they mention Allmight.” Bakugou grinned at him.

“Fuck. I knew you hated me. I like having a liver.” Hitoshi started laughing as Bakugou leaned their foreheads together. Maybe it wasn’t the worst outcome for being impulsive, but Bakugou wasn’t what he’d expected. The man kept showing him secrets people never seemed to know about him and it felt good. It felt really good to be part of those secrets. Even if they were lying to people together just to irritate the shit out of them. It was worth it.

They didn’t talk about what had happened. They just laughed and bitched at the movie they rented. Bakugou showed him how to make caramel popcorn on the stove like the culinary genius he was. Hitoshi knew he’d burn it if he tried by himself. His apartment felt warmer with Bakugou there. The way the blond took up his space and doted on Rin. It was always hard to see him go in the morning.

Hitoshi was still laying in bed staring at the ceiling when his phone chimed in the late morning. He picked it up half expecting Denki to be trying to say something pointless. Sitting up he stared at his phone.

Deku: Hey! We haven’t talked in a while. Everyone’s missed you.
Deku: I know you’re not big on group stuff so I was hoping we could catch each other for lunch or something. I’m free today.
Me: Sure. I’ll get dressed and we can meet up.

The place Midoriya chose was cute. It was family owned and quiet. The coffee was good even if the staff seemed confused that he wanted it this late in the day when most people were ordering tea. Hitoshi finished picking out the exits pretending to examine the art on the wall. He raised a brow at Midoriya.

“It’s been a while. I really wanted to catch up. I saw your stats recently when I was checking everyone’s rankings. Your dad must be really proud of you.” Midoriya was kittens and rainbows as he smiled brightly. It was familiar in a way that left him at ease as he leaned back in his seat. “How are you doing?”

“I’ve been okay. They’ve switched me to a lot of long missions instead of night patrols.” Hitoshi answered absently as they waited on their food. “How’s Todoroki?”

“He’s good. Really good. I have to keep reminding him I can buy my own clothes though.” Midoriya laughed. He sipped at his tea and settled it between his hands. “How’s Kaminari?”

“We broke up.” Hitoshi mumbled. “I figured you’d have heard about it by now. It happened a while ago. I just haven’t gone around bitching about it.”

“That wouldn’t be you anyways. You’re not that kind of person. You seeing anyone new?” Midoriya eyed Hitoshi’s black coffee and failed to stop himself from making a face realizing Hitoshi hadn’t even put sugar in it. “We don’t have to talk about it. I don’t want to be pushy. It’s your private life.”

“Friends usually discuss it. I’m not… I’m not sure exactly what anything is with the person I’ve been getting close to.” Hitoshi shrugged. He stared Midoriya down as the man started analyzing his face. “It’s Bakugou.”

“You’re seeing Bakugou?” Midoriya looked momentarily shocked before he gave a soft chuckle. “I don’t think I expected that. He was really broken up about the thing with Kirishima. Maybe that’s why he seems happier. I actually caught him smiling at his phone the other day when we were on the same shift.”

“It’s not really a big thing. Just don’t go broadcasting that. He told Denki we were dating to get him to get him to leave me alone for a while.” Hitoshi grumbled rubbing the back of his neck. He offered the waitress a smile when she brought over their meals.

“Secret is safe with me. I heard a bit about Denki the other day. I wasn’t sure if it was true though. You’ve always been close to him and Tetsutetsu so when someone told me they were together I wasn’t sure if they were assuming or not.” Midoriya made a face as he picked at his food. “Weren’t you still living together?”

“Yeah. I moved out. I couldn’t take it anymore.” Hitoshi examined him for another moment before leaning back in his seat. “You’re really bad about probing for information. You already knew Denki and I split up. You already heard the rumor I was dating Bakugou from at least two or more people. Just like you’ve known for a while that Denki was fucking around with Tetsu.”

“Fine. I knew. I just didn’t want to assume people were telling the truth without checking with you. Kirishima reached out to me of all people trying to figure out if I knew anything because Kacchan and me sort of figured out our issues and are back to being closer.” Midoriya’s shoulders slumped as he ducked his head in guilt. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine. It’s just complicated. We were just drinking and being assholes to each other for fun. I don’t know what changed about it. I’m really confused about all of it.” Hitoshi picked at his meal starting to eat slowly.

“You wouldn’t know unless you asked.” Midoriya offered the answer like it wasn’t obvious and Hitoshi found himself nodding. That was what he’d blown up his relationship with Denki. Not talking about the things that mattered destroyed it. “Kacchan is more of an action over words kind of person though.”

“I’ve noticed. He wasn’t what I expected.” Hitoshi stared down at his plate. “He’s a lot kinder than I thought he was capable of.”

Midoriya smiled at him. “He’s an interesting person. High school changed a lot about him.”

“It changed a lot for all of us.” Hitoshi sighed. “Kirishima has me confused though. He broke up with Bakugou, but he was so pissed last night seeing me and Bakugou together at the club. He was ignoring his fiancé. The guy looked really uncomfortable and Kirishima kept him there until we said we were leaving.”

“I… don’t want to say anything bad about someone I’m not really familiar with, but I heard a few rumors that the guy Kirishima is seeing is a hero chaser.” Midoriya made a face. “So I’m confused about why Kirishima would get involved with someone that’s probably obsessed with a bunch of people.”

“He’s still in love with Bakugou. He’s being a shit person.” Hitoshi muttered.

“Well, Kacchan told me some stuff a few times. Kirishima’s kind of possessive.” Midoriya looked uncomfortable as he shifted in his seat. “He’s a great hero. I just didn’t like some of the stuff Kacchan told me when they were still dating.”

“I’m not going to ask. If I need to know Bakugou will tell me.” Hitoshi cut off the topic. It wasn’t his business to get dragged into any of it unless Bakugou was ready to flip to that page in their friendship.

The rest of lunch was filled with them bringing up stories from their experiences working in the field. Midoriya was doing well for himself in the rankings. He already knew that, but it was good to hear that he was happy his hard work was paying off. Hitoshi let himself ignore the questions mulling over in the back of his brain.

His phone chimed as he left the restaurant dragging his attention away from trying to remember which way he needed to walk to get to the train station. Bakugou.

BakuHo: Work was shit. I had patrol with Mina and she wouldn’t stop talking.
BakuHo: I’m too tired for this shit.
BakuHo: Come over to my place. I already fed Rin and changed her water. I bought you an automatic feeder so you can spend the night if we’re up past the last train.

Hitoshi felt his heart stutter so hard he thought it would give out. Bakugou in his own way asked him to come sleep over. Hitoshi didn’t bother taking the train far enough to his stop. Bakugou’s place was a stop before his after all.

He hadn’t replied to the texts so when he knocked on the door Bakugou looked pissed for a moment. The tension in the blonds shoulders faded away as he stepped aside.

“Could have texted back. Asshole.” Bakugou snipped at him.

“Ruins the element of surprise.” Hitoshi grinned at him. “What’s the plan?”

“I didn’t get that far.” The blond grumbled as Hitoshi finally walked into the apartment. “Probably dinner.”

“Want me to cook?” Hitoshi hung up his jacket kicking off his shoes. He’d only been over twice that he could think of, but it felt familiar and comfortable. A grunt was forced out of him as Bakugou shoved him toward the kitchen. “I can walk jackass.”

“You’re helping me cook. Work for your food.” Bakugou cackled at him as he threw Hitoshi an apron. “You’re gonna peel vegetables for me. I’m making curry.”

“I can make rice too.” It was easy to find a knife in the meticulously organized kitchen while Bakugou stacked vegetables near a cutting board for him.

“Like hell am I about to let you touch my rice cooker.” The flat stare he got made Hitoshi laugh. “Peel all that. I’ll chop it.”

“I can do that.” It was easy for him to settle into peeling vegetables listening to Bakugou bitching about work. Every time he set something aside Bakugou chopped it quick enough it was like it had never been there at all. After a while it became a mindless task until he realized he’d finished peeling things and stood there watching Bakugou start cooking things in a pot. “I had lunch with Midoriya today.”

Bakugou gave him a curious look for a moment before focusing on what he was doing. “Was he being nosy?”

“He was probing me for information. He’s not very good at it for someone that can observe objectively and give a thirty page quirk analysis without any room for error.” Hitoshi pointed out. He was still trying to figure out what to take from the conversation they’d had.

Bakugou huffed out a laugh. “Don’t worry about it. He’s just trying to be a decent friend. Fucking annoying, but it’s his way of trying to show he cares. I still hate that shit.”

Hitoshi wanted to say something, but he couldn’t come up with anything worthy of putting to words. He startled as he felt an arm wrap around his waist from behind as Bakugou leaned his weight against him. “What happened last night. I don’t regret it either. I can’t remember if I said anything about it.”

“Good. I shouldn’t have been that pushy since we were drinking. I’m not that kind of person.” Bakugou sounded bitter almost as if he was angry with himself. Hitoshi forced him to give him enough space to turn himself around.

“Are you okay with it? I wasn’t the only person drinking.” Hitoshi pointed out. It was harder to talk about it sober. It shouldn’t have been, but he could understand why Bakugou was feeling something about it.

“If I had a problem with it then I wouldn’t have texted you.” The blond reminded him moving closer as he gripped the counter on each side of him. “I’d do it again without the alcohol too.”

Hitoshi hesitated for a moment before hooking a finger into one of the belt loops on Bakugou’s pants pulling him closer. Why was it so much more intense sober? His hesitation was forced to an end as Bakugou leaned down the two inches to brush their lips together. It wasn’t filled with teeth this time. It was gentle.

All of it was gentle. The way Bakugou’s hands slid down his sides to hold his hips. Lips pressing carefully against his own until Hitoshi finally parted them. There wasn’t anything rough or hurried in the way Bakugou deepened their kiss. His eyes fluttered shut as he groaned softly. How was it that just being kissed so carefully had his heart hammering in his chest?

Hitoshi finally pulled back to catch his breath trying to focus on something. That wasn’t the sort of kiss you just gave someone you were screwing around with. “I didn’t expect that kind of a kiss out of you.”

“I can be gentle if I feel like it.” Bakugou hummed kissing his cheek. “I’m going to start rice.”

Hitoshi perched on a bar stool leaning on the kitchen island as Bakugou moved around the kitchen in a way that was simply at ease in his environment. He blinked as Bakugou held up a beer. “I’m okay. I don’t think I’m up to drinking.”

“That’s fine. I have other stuff. Want tea?” Bakugou didn’t miss a beat. After a moment he glanced at Hitoshi. “Tired of drinking or are you planning on something later?”

Hitoshi huffed as his cheeks darkened. It was hard to look at him. He just wanted to be sober in case something did happen. “I wouldn’t be opposed and I doubt either of us need to be drunk for that. I don’t need to be drunk to want you to touch me.”

“We can watch something in bed after we eat.” Bakugou sounded like he was giving him a choice to decide which way things were going to go. It was an alien feeling being given a choice so often without having to step out of his comfort zone to make someone else happy. It wasn’t always how things had gone with Denki, but sometimes he just stopped listening when he was having fun.

Mina had apparently just talked for hours about nothing that really mattered. That was entirely what he expected out of her. At least she hadn’t changed since they’d graduated. Hitoshi simply listened to Bakugou rant while they ate. Without the cloud of alcohol he noticed more of the blond. The way his face would crinkle by his eyes when he laughed hard enough. He was expressive and alive.

Hitoshi helped him wash dishes before they settled into bed. Bakugou picked a random movie that the streaming service he’d selected was recommending. It sounded interesting for an action film. Sucking in a slow breath he tried to calm his nerves. He wasn’t sure how he could go against a person that could easily kill him and couldn’t keep himself from being awkward in this sort of situation. Hitoshi leaned back on the bed slowly settling into Bakugou’s side. He let his head rest on his shoulder as he put an arm around the blond.

Bakugou grumbled at him for a moment before forcefully dragging him into a proper cuddle. Hitoshi found himself pressed against Bakugou’s side with his head in his chest rather then his chest. His thigh was jerked across the blonds hips resting heavily over him. Bakugou just chuckled near his ear. “Don’t half ass it.”

Hitoshi caught the faint jingle as his eyes darted down for a fraction of a second. The black bands and micro tags must have been the quirk dampeners Bakugou had been talking about. Bakugou said not to half ass it. Hitoshi put a hand on his chest shifting his weight until he was sitting atop the blond. To his credit Bakugou just grinned at him running his hands up Hitoshi’s thighs watching him. He wasn’t some blushing virgin, but there was a lot he didn’t know about Bakugou. Namely what kind of person he was when it came to sex.

The television was a faint hum in the back of his mind as he slowly rolled his hips forward grinding back as he watched Bakugou’s expression. His brow twitched slightly as he settled deeper into his bed watching Hitoshi. His hands were tight around his hips steadying him. Hitoshi let his hand stay pressed against Bakugou’s belly allowing him to guide his hips. As he went to pull his shirt up his hands were forced to stop.

“Do you not want to?” Hitoshi momentarily wondered if he was pushing for something Bakugou didn’t want right now. His hands were pulled back to the blonds chest adding to the confusion.

“You don’t have to be anywhere, right? Don’t rush.” Bakugou grinned at him from the space he was laying out on the bed. “Slow down.”

Hitoshi felt his shoulders relax as he began to grin back. Hands touched him anywhere they could reach. Running along his thighs, carefully tracing the bones of his hips, slipping up his sides beneath his shirt so light it made him shudder. The way Bakugou was watching him had shivers running up his spine. Hitoshi leaned down smiling as Bakugou propped himself up on his elbows meeting him halfway for a kiss.

He felt himself being forced back up as Bakugou sat up stealing lazy kisses from him as hands slid up his sides bunching the fabric of his shirt until Hitoshi raised his arms. His shirt fell to the floor as it was thrown off of the bed carelessly.

“You look pretty like this.” Bakugou murmured against his skin pressing kisses against his shoulder. He made him feel exposed. Hands tracing every inch of his skin as Bakugou’s lips explored his chest. Nothing was left untouched and Hitoshi wasn’t sure how he should feel, but he did know he’d never been treated so carefully by anyone else in his life.

“Take this off.” Hitoshi pulled him back into a kiss before sliding his hands up Bakugou’s sides like he’d done for him. As the blond raised his arms for him Hitoshi threw the fabric off of the bed feeling like the temperature in the room had turned into a blazing fire. Skin to skin it was different than it had been grinding sloppily on his couch trying to get off on each other. His fingers mapped the scars trailing along Bakugou’s body.

“What’s this?” Bakugou pulled back touching his side. His eyes shifting over the cluster of scarred flesh.

“Lichtenberg figures.” Hitoshi lifted his arm to look at the mess of silver scars along his side.

“You were electrocuted. Don’t these normally fade away.” Bakugou looked up at him.

“Not if they’re quirk based.” Hitoshi wanted to hide it. His jaw was grabbed forcing his attention back to Bakugou.

“Don’t. It doesn’t bother me.” Bakugou smiled at him tracing the scars for a moment before pulling him down for another kiss. “We can stop if you want, but I’d be okay with continuing.”

“I want to keep going. I just haven’t ever shown them to anyone else. Hard for people to notice them in the dark.” Hitoshi admitted quietly. He let himself fall back into Bakugou. Kissing him slowly and lingering between each one with a quiet sound.

Hitoshi felt like he wouldn’t live down the yelp Bakugou forced out of him as he was flipped onto his stomach under the blond. A hand smoothing up his back as lips trailed along his spine. Teeth gently digging into the back of his neck as Bakugou hovered over him him. One of his hands pulled up above his head on the bed as Bakugou laced their fingers together.

“You’re covered in scars.” Bakugou pulled back leaving Hitoshi in confusion as fingers traced each of them. “I didn’t expect this many.”

“You almost sound romantic.” Hitoshi huffed at him glancing back over his shoulder.

“Maybe I am.” Bakugou groaned dramatically dropping his weight down onto him hard enough to knock the air from his lungs. They were silent for a moment before they each burst into laughter.

“You’re such an asshole.” Hitoshi groaned into the pillows. He felt Bakugou pushing his other hand upward. Their fingers were laced together as Bakugou trailed kisses along the back of his neck. His hands were finally freed as he felt him pull away momentarily. Those same kisses were trailed over his shoulders, his ribs, along each and every scar Bakugou could get his mouth on.

When Hitoshi finally had enough of it he rolled Bakugou. They’d both done enough combat training that if the blond had any intention of stopping him that wouldn’t have happened. So he settled over him caged between Bakugou’s legs sliding his hands over muscled thighs until he wrapped a hand around him. He didn’t squeeze around his cock. He simply let his hand trail over it as he reached for the button of his pants.

“I should have asked. Do you bottom? Or are you more into taking control?” Bakugou let his hands rest above his head as he looked up at him comfortably exposed as he lay on his back.

“I could go either way. I haven’t really had a chance to bottom.” Hitoshi was too focused on not fumbling as he unfastened Bakugou’s pants to react immediately as a hand grabbed his wrist. “Bakugou?”

“You’ve never bottomed?” The blond looked incredibly confused. “But you’ve slept with a bunch of people. No one even offered?”

“Most guys came already prepared.” Hitoshi shrugged. It wasn’t much of an issue in his mind. Apparently it bothered the living shit out of Bakugou since he was flipped back down onto the bed. “We’re going to end up falling off if we keep wrestling.”

“Do you want to?” Bakugou was searching his expression like he was waiting for something that Hitoshi wasn’t sure he had a real answer for.

“Is it going to be like losing my virginity again?” Hitoshi snorted.

Bakugou let out an ugly laugh sitting back on his heels completely comfortable with his pants undone and his cock pressing angrily against the leg of his jeans. It was endearing in a way. “Not really. I’ll make it better than that.”

Hitoshi thought about it for almost a minute while Bakugou patiently waited. He wasn’t urged to make a quick decision, but when he did finally nod Bakugou smiled at him. “It’s going to hurt, right?”

“Only if you’re fucking an idiot. I’ll grab some condoms and stuff.” Bakugou started to move away and Hitoshi’s hand lashed out grabbing his without thinking.

“You don’t need them. Unless you do.” Hitoshi regretted the offer in an instant seeing the shock on Bakugou’s face. Before he could try to make up an excuse he felt a kiss on the back of his hand.

“I could go without. I’m always safe with people I sleep with randomly.” Bakugou pointed out. “I get tested regularly.”

“I got tested after the last person I slept with. I’m not trying to pressure you to do it like that. I don’t know why I even offered.” Hitoshi mumbled feeling like he’d said the stupidest thing he could have on a whim.

“You couldn’t pressure me if you tried. Just stay here.” Bakugou slapped his thigh affectionately as he scooted over to the night stand to dig through it. He returned with a sleek black bottle and tossed it beside Hitoshi. “How many times do you think you can come before you pass out?”

“I don’t know. Twice?” Hitoshi rolled his eyes with a laugh.

“Good. I’m aiming for four.” The vicious grin on blond made him freeze.

“If two is what I think I can manage why are you about to say four?” Hitoshi raised his hips as Bakugou untasted his pants.

“Because then I’ll be the best you’ve ever had.” The grin Bakugou gave him when he said it almost made him moan.

“You’re a menace.” He found himself laughing. There was a lot of confidence he was placing in the blond as his pants were being tossed away. Fingers slipping off his boxers slow as Bakugou traced the lines of his hips with his mouth slowly enough it was maddening until he felt a mouth wrapping around the tip of his cock just as Bakugou traced the rim of his ass. It wasn’t the most erotic way to describe it, but the fact the blond took his cock down to the base pressing a finger into him slowly made it just about that.

It was uncomfortable, but at the same time he had Bakugou swallowing around him peering at him through long lashes like he was proud of himself. Hitoshi would have opened his mouth to say something, but all that came out was a broken moan. Fucking himself with a toy didn’t compare to this. Hitoshi almost clamped his thighs shut as Bakugou pressed against the bundle of nerves again.

He was slow about it. He worked him open, slow and careful like he was memorizing every sound and reaction he gave him. At some point his brain started feeling as if it were empty as he tried to get more of the sensation. Frustration welling up as Bakugou pinned his hips pulling off of his cock with a smirk.

Before Hitoshi could even bitch at Bakugou he put more force into each slide of his fingers. He pressed into the bundle of nerves again and again until it was a sudden sensation of static. Hitoshi found himself staring up at the ceiling panting hard enough he was almost dizzy.

“Didn’t think you’d be a screamer.” Bakugou chuckled as he took off the glove that Hitoshi hadn’t even realized he’d put on.

“Fuck you.” Hitoshi groaned as he sat up just enough to rest his weight on his elbows. Bakugou looked incredibly pleased with himself as he took his time pushing off his pants. Bakugou won by a small margin. His cock wasn’t much longer than his, but he was definitely larger. Hitoshi momentarily tried to calculate if it would even fit without hurting.

“I’ll go slow. We can always quit here or I can try to stretch you more if that makes it better for you.” Bakugou leaned over him pressing small kisses to his lips.

“Keep going. I’ll let you know if it hurts. I know it’s going to be uncomfortable for a bit.” Hitoshi answered against his lips. Bakugou was careful in how he moved Hitoshi’s leg up over his shoulder making him feel a bit awkward as he watched the blond dripping lube over himself spreading it out carefully. Bakugou held himself steady as he slowly pressed the tip against him. Hitoshi wrinkled his nose at the odd sensation until he felt Bakugou push past his rim.

He let himself drop back to the bed as the blond stilled over him. “You alright? Shinsou, I’m serious. I can stop if it hurts.”

“Don’t call me that.” He made a face even as he put an arm over his face trying to collect himself. Bakugou to his credit didn’t pull out. He waited. “If you’re going to fuck me at least call me Hitoshi.”

“This isn’t fucking.” Bakugou stared down at him as Hitoshi moved his arm. “If I just wanted to fuck you then we’d have been done already.”

“That’s really fucking gay of you.” Hitoshi snorted.

“Says the guy with my dick up his ass.” Bakugou rolled his hips forward just enough to knock the next smart ass comment straight out of his mouth. Hitoshi grabbed fistfuls of sheets with a loud moan. “No comment?”

“You’re a-“ Hitoshi just let his voice fail him as Bakugou pressed into him more. He lost track of it as he dug nails into soft skin hearing Bakugou praise him quietly. His eyes fluttering shut trying to make sense of anything until he felt Bakugou’s hips against his.

“Not so bad. Is it, Hitoshi?” Bakugou carefully let his leg down to wrap around his hip. “You’re really tight.”

He wanted to say something, but the way Bakugou was trailing kisses over his neck and across his shoulder had him feeling strange. It was intimate and he hadn’t expected that out of Bakugou. The first rock of his hips threw his line of thinking out of the window. When Hitoshi finally found it in himself to try to move it made it even more intense. They were close enough to share their breath. Bakugou’s forehead resting against his as Hitoshi found the right rhythm to meet each thrust driving himself closer to something short of euphoria.

He’d never experienced something like this. The feeling of someone over him tracing the lines of his body with every part of themself. He found himself gripping Bakugou’s hands when they laced with his again. Bakugou was right. This wasn’t fucking. This was something entirely different and far deeper than every experience he’d had with Denki combined. The momentary guilt was washed away hearing Bakugou moan his name quietly above him.

Hitoshi wanted to freeze this moment. He wanted to keep it with him for the rest of his life even if he never got a second chance at it. Bakugou paused looking at him with a soft smile. “What?”

“Did anyone ever tell you that your eyes glow?” Bakugou chuckled even as he started moving again.

“What?” Hitoshi tried to focus on the confusion, but it faded just as quickly as it appeared. Bakugou shifted his hips pressing into that bundle of nerves with every thrust.

“When you’re really turned on your eyes start glowing like they do when you activate your quirk. It’s really attractive.” Bakugou let go of one of his hands rolling his hips up by force as he pushed his thigh up higher. His bracelet jingled quietly as he moved. Despite how gentle he was each thrust was more forceful than the last.

Hitoshi felt himself falling apart beneath him as he dug nails into Bakugou’s shoulder. His nails scraping down his back as he gasped and moaned trying to make sense of anything as he was pushed closer to the edge with every move the man made. He barely managed to string two words together in his head trying to say something. He finally settled on just one.

“Katsuki.”

Everything felt like it had imploded or possibly exploded. Bakugou was losing his rhythm. Hitoshi found himself at a loss for common sense as he held him tight and though he’d never thought it possible they met in the middle of it all. Bakugou groaned out his name as Hitoshi found himself crying out, forced over the edge of the metaphorical cliff as he came between them. The warmth that settled into his belly as they caught their breath felt like it was melting every thought in his head. Neither of them made to move apart as Bakugou rested their foreheads together.

“Are you going to leave?” Bakugou was so quiet as he said the words that Hitoshi barely caught them.

“Why would I?” Hitoshi tilted his head brushing their noses together with a soft laugh. “You just gave me the best orgasm I have ever had in my life. I just… I wasn’t expecting it to feel like that.”

Bakugou propped himself up on his elbow to get a better look at him. “Like what?”

“Intense. I don’t think I’ve ever had someone make me feel like that during sex.” Hitoshi couldn’t find the words to say something of real value even as Bakugou carefully pulled out. He watched the blond leave long enough to gather a cloth to clean them both up. It was embarrassing wiping cum away while someone watched, but it wasn’t the most awkward experience of his life. “Are you like that with everyone?”

“That gentle? No. I can’t really care enough about other people to want to be that gentle with them.” Bakugou wasn’t lying. He didn’t lie about things.

“I don’t think I’d call it making love, but it was pretty damn close.” Hitoshi finally let himself drop back onto the mattress. “That was… not what I was expecting.”

“You keep saying that.” Bakugou sounded satisfied with himself. “I enjoyed it. Being that close to you was worth waiting until I had these things.”

Hitoshi grinned as Bakugou jingled his bracelets. “They make a pretty big difference. I’d do this again.”

“Good. Because I still owe you two more tonight.” Bakugou grinned as he leaned over him. “We can keep a tally chart after that. Let me get to a hundred, Hitoshi.”

“You get one more tonight. I’ll cash in on the others later. My turn on top.” He laughed forcing Bakugou onto his back. “Let’s see who can last longer.”

“You’re on.” Bakugou smirked up at him.

———

It was easy to miss at first. In the days and weeks that passed Hitoshi barely noticed the change. Bakugou had gone from existing in the same place publically when they were around others they knew to existing near him. It changed again after a while. Bakugou stayed beside him when their friends were around. He existed in his space without a word and Hitoshi let it happen.

They’d taken up space in each others lives in a way Hitoshi hadn’t expected. He’d never expected to bring Bakugou along to family dinners or be invited to have dinner with Bakugou’s boisterous household. He’d started keeping a drawer at Bakugou’s place since they were at one apartment or another whenever they were both in town. He had a key to Bakugou’s place now.

A bunch of their former classmates decided to gather for a night out and despite his hesitation he’d agreed. Bakugou was fine with going despite the fact he loudly bitched about how annoying most of their classmates were. It was still easy to feel out of place even when he was familiar with everyone at the club. The thump of the music barely louder than his thoughts as he mentally cataloged how many bruises and cuts he had on his face from his last mission. He’d barely scraped by with more than a few bumps and bruises.

Mina was loudly arguing with Denki and Sero while Jirou and Momo were giggling over their drinks. Midoriya was already out dancing with Todoroki while others were chattering or dragging one another out to the dance floor. Hitoshi sipped his cocktail trying to decide if he wanted to bail on the night after all.

“You’re thinking to much. Drink these and then you’re going to come dance with me.” Bakugou smirked setting two shots in front of him.

“They’re going to see.” Hitoshi reminded him.

“See what? The fact we’re dating?” Bakugou snorted. Hitoshi stared at him trying to figure out what he’d heard. “You are a dense bitch.”

Hitoshi offered a grunt knocking back both of the shots before standing. “I wasn’t going to assume considering we never talked about it.”

“I’d hate it if you did, but we’re dating. I’ve had dinner with your family and you’ve met my parents. We share our apartments. I gave you a drawer.” Bakugou burst out laughing. “Shit. We’ve been dating for almost three months and you didn’t notice any of that?”

“At least I didn’t assume I had a boyfriend. Asshole.” Hitoshi shoved his shoulder. Not as hard as he could have, but enough to make the blond step back and laugh harder.

Bakugou just grinned at him. “You sure about that?”

The words settled in as Bakugou walked off towards the dance floor. “Wait! What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He jogged awkwardly to catch up and grab the blond by the wrist. His heart felt like it was in his throat. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“That if you’re done being a dense fuck I might be open to something a little more exclusive.” Bakugou grinned at him pulling him onto the dance floor. “That okay with you, Hitoshi?”

“You really don’t care if everyone knows?” Hitoshi glanced back at their friends feeling the hair on the back of his neck rise as he caught the eyes of several of their less close friends. Bakugou grabbed him by the chin dragging him into a kiss that killed the distraction entirely as Hitoshi felt himself relax.

“I don’t give a fuck what they think. I care what you think. You have no idea how good it feels to have someone that treats me like you do.” Bakugou grinned at him. “Fuck them.”

“I could be good with exclusive. You’re a decent fuck I guess.” Hitoshi smirked at him giving a laugh as Bakugou grabbed for his hair to bite his cheek. “Ow. Stop being an asshole for two seconds.”

“Stop being a sarcastic bitch and just admit you like me for more than my phenomenal sex skills.” Bakugou laughed openly. He was smiling and under the erratic lighting he looked beautiful. Hitoshi didn’t think about it as he grabbed his shirt pulling him into a kiss. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

They didn’t fight, but they made a ruckus on the dance floor as they danced and threw affectionate insults at each other. Hitoshi might have snuck in a few tugs at the blond’s hair and Bakugou was sporting a pretty hefty bite on the corner of his jaw when they finally stumbled off of the dance floor to get another drink. Mina was staring at them both with wide eyes and amusement in her smile.

“I thought Denki and Kirishima were joking when they said you two were a thing a while ago. I’m so happy for you guys. It’s so cute!” She laughed patting the seat next to her. Bakugou shoved Hitoshi into the spot beside her saying he was grabbing drinks as he left him to Mina’s curiosity. “He’s such a cranky bitch sometimes. I’m just shocked seeing him look so happy. He was so torn up about what happened I swore they would get back together.”

“I think Kirishima burned that bridge getting engaged.” Hitoshi reminded her absently.

“Oh, shit. Yeah. That would do it. They were so good together when we were in school. I don’t even know where that went wrong. I’m just glad he moved on though. He looks really happy.” She smiled looking toward the bar before she narrowed her eyes at him. “If you ever hurt him I’ll dip your nuts in acid. Got it?”

“If I had any left after he got through with me then you’re more than welcome. I don’t plan on hurting him. Bakugou’s not really what I expected.” Hitoshi took the threat without caution. Mina wasn’t that much of a monster.

“Well, most people don’t get to know him very well. He’s a big teddy bear.” Mina giggled before waving at Sero and Denki as they joined. “No Tetsu tonight?”

“Patrol. It’s stupid.” Denki whined with a pout before he looked across the table at Hitoshi. “I… wanted to talk to you at some point.”

“Watch out. Sleepy has a love triangle.” Sero wheezed out a laugh. He looked like he’d been drinking quite a bit.

“Sero don’t be a jerk.” Mina frowned at him.

“I’m being good. I didn’t ask if Bakugou likes to ride bitch.” Sero laughed louder.

“What if I do?” Bakugou set drinks on the table sitting down beside Hitoshi. “What Spark Plug?”

“Can I steal ‘To- Shinsou? Just for a bit. I want to talk.” Denki looked increasingly uncomfortable under Bakugou’s watchful eyes.

“I’m not his fucking keeper.” The blond took a sip of his drink shrugging when Hitoshi spared him a glance.

“Just for a bit.” Hitoshi finally relented as he stood up. “I’m not going to spend hours talking when we have cold drinks on the table.”

“I’m good with that.” Denki smiled a bit. They didn’t walk far from the others. Easily out of eyeshot, but not view as Denki fidgeted with his fingers. “I’m sorry. About everything.”

“You keep saying that. We both did a lot of shit that wasn’t good for either of us. I was being petty because things didn’t work out. I’m glad you have Tetsu. He’s a good guy. We got distant when you both started dating because it got weird.” Hitoshi crossed his arms. It wasn’t meant to guilt him, but it was a fact that needed to be stated. He missed his friend. “I don’t hate either of you.”

“I spent a long time worrying about you because of everything that happened. I was jealous and selfish over stupid stuff that didn’t matter and I took advantage of you.” Denki looked down at the ground, finally stilling. “I asked you to do things for me without considering how it might have made you feel.”

“We all make mistakes, Denki. We weren’t healthy with each other. I didn’t notice that until I finally moved on.” Hitoshi felt his body relaxing as he realized that Denki wasn’t trying to make excuses. He was trying to be genuine in his own way.

“I asked you for things that I never should have. I shouldn’t have kept asking you to brainwash me. I don’t think about the fact that it wasn't going to help you be okay with anything. I was selfish. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Denki looked almost as if he was close to tears. “I pushed you out because I couldn’t handle being with you and watching you spiral out. I didn’t help keep you stable when all I was asking was for you to set aside your comfort for mine.”

“It’s not your job. Denki. My stability is on me. It was never on you. I loved you enough that I didn’t say no when I should have. I put myself there and I chose to let myself hurt trying to make you happy. I don’t think either of us were happy in the end.” Hitoshi rubbed the back of his neck with a sigh. Shaking his head he ruffled Denki’s hair. “I accept your apology. So, you better be good to my friend. Tetsu is an amazing person.”

Denki stared up at him for a moment before nodding. “Yeah. He is.”

“I want you to stay out of my relationship though. Katsuki makes me happy. I don’t care about what happened between him and Kirishima. They made their own choices and mistakes like we did.” Hitoshi pointed out. He smiled when Denki nodded, wiping at his eyes. “We’re both happy. I think that was the best possible outcome from the mess we made between us.”

“Bakugou is a good person. He’s a raging asshole, but he’s loyal and honest. I don’t think I’d have ever been enough. You need someone like him.” Denki added after a moment.

“I don’t need him. I want him. Saying I need him would mean I wasn’t able to handle myself.” Hitoshi glanced toward the table where Bakugou was watching them. “I stopped drinking like I used to when we started dating. I didn’t need to be numb just to survive anymore. I don’t want to give that up.”

“I’m happy for you. Just try to let yourself be happy. I know sometimes you get stuck in your head.” Denki put his hands in his pockets growing quiet for a while. “Please be happy?”

“I will be. He doesn’t give me time to dwell. He’s too chaotic for that. I think that’s what I needed in my life. Constructive chaos.” Hitoshi chuckled. He threw an arm around Denki’s shoulders. “Get it together and get shitfaced with us. It’s a party. Enjoy it.”

Denki laughed following him back to the table. He sat beside them all with a smile on his face. Hitoshi glanced in Bakugou’s direction taking in the tension in his frame. He leaned against him pressing their shoulders together until Bakugou moved his arm. It settled around him keeping him close as the drank and everyone started talking a about their lives after graduation. Everyone was laughing and smiling. Mina and Sero joined them dragging everyone into old stories from school in hopes of embarrassing Bakugou.

It was peaceful in a way. The group laughing together and saying their hellos and goodbyes when others stopped by their table to chat for a while. It was peaceful until Kirishima came over.

“Hey guys. Bakugou did you have a second?” Kirishima had a beer in hand with a smile on his face. He looked like he’d been drinking for a while. His grin was lopsided and awkward as he stood beside the table ignoring everyone as he looked at Bakugou.

“Not really. I’m spending time with my boyfriend. We barely wanted to come out tonight.” The reply Bakugou gave was flat just like the expression on his face. He wasn’t leaving room for discussion as his features became bland and almost annoyed. His hand pressed harder against Hitoshi’s waist pulling him closer.

Kirishima’s expression changed. There was something there that Hitoshi couldn’t immediately place as the redhead said something that made the entire table pause. “Why him?”

“Excuse me? You don’t get to fucking ask me that. You don’t get to have a fucking opinion on who I’m dating.” Bakugou snapped. The blank expression twisted into anger.

“Hey Kiribabe I think you had enough to drink.” Mina had an awkward smile on her face as she stood up reaching for Kirishima’s beer. He pulled it out of reach. “Maybe you should call it a night.”

“Why? Because I’m concerned about Bakugou making a shit choice?” Kirishima snapped.

“The fuck?” Bakugou was snarling now. His hand moved as he stood up pausing only because Hitoshi grabbed his hand. “He’s a better fucking choice than you. You didn’t even give me a chance to tell you why. You just ran off and fucked some extra before we even broke up because you were so damn ‘hurt’ I didn’t want to get married because we are too damn young.”

“You could have told me that.” Kirishima looked just as angry as Mina and Sero tried to get him to calm down. Hitoshi stood up beside Bakugou as a frown formed on his face.

“Maybe you should just let go. You should let go of him and stop acting like Bakugou still belongs to you.” Hitoshi could feel anger brewing in the pit of his belly. “You moved on and got engaged just like you wanted. Isn’t that unfair to the man you’re engaged to?”

“Who the fuck asked you? You’re the one trying to take everything from me.” Kirishima snarled. He stepped forward pausing only when Todoroki and Midoriya stood up. “You’re just going to side with him? He doesn’t even have a decent quirk.”

“Are you sure?” Hitoshi bared his teeth.

“Yea-“ Kirishima went still as his eyes became blank. Hitoshi could feel it in his bones as the redhead fell under his quirk. It wasn’t hard. He was being impulsive and failed to recognize a trigger when it was presented.

“Text your fiancé that you’re on the way home. Then start walking toward the exit.” Hitoshi could feel his quirk tightening around Kirishima’s mind as the redhead pulled out his phone typing slowly. He watched as he turned on his heel. It wasn’t hard to let him go.

He saw Kirishima picking up a phone call as he released his quirk once the man was halfway to the exit. The way everyone stared at him made his skin crawl as he sat down picking up his drink again.

“What the hell was that?” Mina had a frown plastered on her face.

“The real Kirishima.” Bakugou grumbled sitting back down. “You alright, ‘Toshi?”

“I’m fine. I just didn’t expect him to do that. I knew he was pissed off about us dating, but that was a lot of bullshit. He doesn’t have a right to be angry.” Hitoshi made a face.

“Kacchan. We could always move this to your place or mine. I think I’m done with the club.” Midoriya smiled weakly. He was trying to help and Hitoshi could appreciate it since Bakugou nodded. “Besides. You haven’t let me meet your cat yet. He’s probably cute.”

“Whatever. I’d rather get trashed at home.” Bakugou stood up again grabbing his jacket. “Let’s go fuckers. Denki can come too.”

Hitoshi felt better at Katsuki’s place. Their friends were spread between the couch and the kitchen where he sat on the counter listening to Midoriya arguing with his boyfriend. It was weird to think that he had one. He’d been alone since Denki and had preferred if that way for so long. Katsuki handed him another rum and coke as he snapped something Hitoshi couldn’t catch at their friend.

“Aw! There’s two cats!” Mina squealed.

“Don’t bother the kitten. Rin is skittish.” Katsuki snapped.

“This place is so damn expensive. Must be making good money to afford it.” Sero laughed trying to play around with the cats.

“Parents bought it as a graduation present. All the units here are privately owned. We pay for the amenities and property upkeep only.” Katsuki bitched. “Oi. Hitoshi I’m sick of bouncing apartments. Move in.”

There was a bit of a slur to his words, but Hitoshi could see the genuine side of his demand. “Sure. Not sure where you’re going to put my dildo collection.” He didn’t have one, but the fact Katsuki laughed so hard he had tequila shoot out of his nose was worth it. The blond started cursing violently as he tried wiping his face off as if it would help.

“Motherfucker. You’re a bitch.” Katsuki wheezed as everyone started laughing.

“That’s why you like me.” Hitoshi shrugged.

They spent the night with their friends. They spent it laughing and playing stupid games. He had a smile on his face watching from the sidelines as Katsuki tried to one up Midoriya about whose partner was better. It didn’t stop the unease he felt somewhere in the back of his mind. Everything with Kirishima at the club as quick as it had been said something he didn’t quite know how to add together. Why would he have been so angry when he was the one that walked away?

“Fuck you! I’ll be number one and you’re going to drag up third right behind Pinky.” Katsuki cackled.

It was a thought for another time. He’d puzzle it out. Hitoshi joined in stating that Mina would be number one while she shrieked in laughter with Denki and Sero claiming Katsuki would be lucky to make it to third with his attitude. Midoriya was in hysterics as Katsuki started yelling at all of them about how the rankings would go. He couldn’t find it in himself to ask about it when everyone did finally start leaving or finding a place to sleep. He lay on the bed beside Katsuki trying to analyze all of the evidence before him.

Unless it had more to do with who Katsuki was rather than what Katsuki meant to Kirishima there weren’t other conclusions he could make by the time he finally settled into sleep. Katsuki and the others were gone when he woke up. A short note on the fridge about Katsuki going to work was all he had since the blond rarely texted him this early. It was sweet in its own way. Katsuki knew how poorly he slept and always minimized the chances of waking him up without need.

Since he wasn’t waiting on or planning on making food he changed into something comfortable and took a walk to the local coffee shop. It had been a nice find since Katsuki didn’t exactly like coffee, but they had baked goods he could usually entice him to join for so he could have a cup without the awkward silence sitting in the corner of the shop watching people wander about. It was awkward if it wasn’t for work.

Hitoshi took a sip from his cup as he started walking back to the apartment considering how he planned to ask Katsuki what really happened with Kirishima. As his boyfriend maybe he had some right to ask? His cup clattered to the ground as he grabbed the wrist of whoever had snatched his shirt. It took the rattling of his brain a moment to stop as he hit the filthy alley wall. “What the fuck, Kirishima?!”

“You fucked it up. You fucked everything up.” The redhead sweethed. He glanced at the entrance of the alley and pulled Hitoshi deeper into it away from the street. “You just had to, didn’t you?”

“I don’t even know what you’re talking about. Katsuki? Is that what this is about? You’re engaged. Katsuki is in a relationship. Why the hell are you getting this irrational?” Hitoshi snapped wrenching himself free by force. The tear in his shirt didn’t matter. The shirt was replaceable and as long as Kirishima didn’t decide to be as stupid as he seemed insane then he’d be fine.

“Irrational? No. No, I’m being rational. You fucked up my plan. I figured maybe I’d get all the way to the altar and he'd realize he screwed up. I made a bad call with what I did. I can live with that, but he was supposed to come back to me.” Kirishima snarled shoving his shoulder.

“That doesn’t even make any sense. Do you hear yourself?” Hitoshi stepped back with the force of it. “What about the fact you’ve been with someone else for a year?”

“I don’t even fucking love him. I just wanted to prove a point.” Kirishima laughed. “He was supposed to come back and we were supposed to hit the top five together. That was the plan.”

“Hard to do that when you fucked up.” Hitoshi laughed bitterly.

“You don’t get it. You fucked up everything. They all think it’s sunshine and rainbows. I had to fight for it. I wouldn’t have made it through UA without him. He wouldn’t have friends without me. He was supposed to be the person I could rely on to actually make it as a hero. Why do you think I even put up with his psychotic ass?” Kirishima shoved him again. “He’s gonna chew you up and leave you with the fallout.”

“So that’s it. He was a meal ticket?” Hitoshi felt the anger rise in him. He felt it in every fiber of his body and it was hard to restrain himself from trying to punch a man he knew could take the hit. “Did you care about him?”

“Do you?” Kirishima’s grin widened.

“You actually thought I’d be back?” The crack in Katsuki’s voice startled Hitoshi out of his anger. The blond was pushing up his mask looking at both of them before he settled his glare on Kirishima. “You think I’d be back after you cheated on me? After you fucking slapped me for calling you out on it? I might have been upset because I was in love with you, but that wouldn’t have changed a thing. I have enough self respect not to stay with some fucking extra that would hit their partner over their own stupid shit.”

“Katsuki.” Kirishima started. His voice cut out as the blond held up a hand.

“Stop harassing Hitoshi and leave us the fuck alone. We’re not coming to your wedding. No one is. No one is going to side with you. You know I came over here because I’m on this patrol route and someone called in a possible abduction or some shit, but this wasn’t what I expected when I got that call.” Katsuki shoved Kirishima aside to get a better look at him. “You good?”

“I could have handled it. I just had questions.” Hitoshi grumbled. It was sweet, but it did at least leave him with the answer everyone seemed to have missed. “I think if you hadn’t been able to hitch your reputation to Katsuki you would have been a villain. That much makes more sense in my head. Katsuki, let’s go. You’re supposed to be on patrol.”

Katsuki paused as they started walking. He tugged his mask back down as he looked at Kirishima. “The next time you try anything I’ll make sure all of Japan knows what kind of hero Red Riot really is. Get your shit together, extra.”

“He made me spill my coffee.” It was the first thing Hitoshi said as they walked back to Katsuki’s standard route and the blond began to laugh. “It was good coffee. He made me fucking drop my cup just to listen to him tell me he couldn’t cut it in school so he had to dick down the best possible cantidate for ranking.”

“How is it that you could have gotten your skull smashed in and you’re more pissed off about dropping your coffee?” Katsuki was still laughing. He was upset, but that didn’t seem to stop his amusement. “God, I feel so stupid I didn’t realize he was just with me because he wanted someone that could get him ahead. You know he’s really dumb, right? The guy used to add stuff and somehow manage to minus it somewhere?”

“It was good coffee.” Hitoshi felt a drop of rain hit his head and frowned. “You going to be okay out here?”

“I can handle a little rain. My quirk isn’t that weak.” Katsuki said as he paused to look up. His eyeliner was starting to run as the rain finally began to pour. Thunder crackled overhead as they stood staring into the sky while the streets began to empty of pedestrians.

“I think I love you.” It was such an absent statement. Lightning flickering over the sky as they stood watching the colors shift.

“Hmm. Kind of a shitty time to say that. Isn’t it?” Katsuki chuckled.

“Yeah, but lying to myself wouldn’t be logical.” Hitoshi looked over at him. He smiled softly. “Plus, I don’t want a reputation as a pro. So if I’m saying it than at least I know it’s not because I want to use you.”

“You’re so bad at wording shit sometimes.” Katsuki laughed. His hair was losing the usual fluff and it was nice to see him a mess in his uniform instead of poised as an immovable force. “I don’t know if I’m ready to say any of that yet. I’ll let you know when I am. Give me a while.”

“I promise not to fuck someone because I didn’t get the answer I wanted.” A smirk plastered itself on Hitoshi’s face as the look of affection on Katsuki’s face morphed instantly into annoyance.

“You’re such an asshole. Oi! Don’t fucking run from me!” Katsuki snarled chasing after him as Hitoshi took off running down the street with a laugh.

Even covered in mud and leaves by the end of the chase Katsuki was smiling and bitching about him needing to be less of a sarcastic asshole. They both knew that wouldn’t change. Not even when Hitoshi pushed Katsuki back down into the mud with a foot hooked around the blond's ankle when he was distracted. Just like he knew Katsuki wasn’t about to be less of himself.

Hitoshi knowing everything that transpired eventually became Midoriya knowing. Slowly Hitoshi watched everyone’s affection for Kirishima dwindle almost like some sort of bleak reminder that Katsuki would always have been fine without him. Katsuki didn’t change in the slightest. The only thing that changed was how honest he was with his friends about how bad things had really been with Kirishima.

Two months later it was like Red Riot had never debuted. No one heard anything about the wedding after that. No one brought him up casually, but they also didn’t talk badly. He’d been everyone’s friend at one point and for that Hitoshi could respect it. His mind was pulling at the angles as everyone sat around the table in the room of the restaurant they’d all rented as a makeshift reunion. Even his parents had shown up.

The Bakugou’s too oddly enough. Hitoshi blinked glancing around. No one else had parents here. The forming thoughts were cut off with a loud thud of Katsuki’s hand in front of him.

“Shut up!” Katsuki snarled at everyone effectively silencing the room. He smirked at the confusion on Hitoshi’s face as he moved his hand leaving something on the table. “I fucking love you or something so marry me.”

“No.” Hitoshi said it on impulse. The whole room was silent as several people stared in shock. Mina and Momo both had their mouths covered trying to hide their surprise while Tetsu was openly staring with a slack jaw at the instant response. Hitoshi picked up the box opening it to look at what lay inside. The band of the ring was thin and matte showing the thought behind it. It wouldn’t have become an issue with his work.

Snapping the box shut he slid it toward Katsuki ignoring the look on his face. Taking a deep breath he stood up. Hitoshi rubbed at the back of his neck watching emotions fluttering over Katsuki’s face. “You’re not going to ask me to marry you.”

“Why the fuck not?” Katsuki finally snapped.

“Because I’m supposed to ask you so you can actually say yes to someone you love without hesitating. So fucking marry me Bakugou Katsuki.” Hitoshi held his hand out. The room burst into laughter as Katsuki stared at him like he’d grown a second head even as he grabbed his hand pulling himself to a stand.

“You’re such a dick.” Katsuki started laughing before pulling him into a kiss. “Yeah. I’ll marry you.”