Chapter Text
Luz couldn’t believe that she was back at The Owl House.
A part of her still can’t believe it – a large part of her, actually – the part that’s kept her safe, kept her alive all this time. As she makes her way downstairs, however, flanked on both sides by Hunter and King, she finds herself trusting in that little glimmer of hope.
Luz can feel her body shift involuntarily as Hunter adjusts his grip, pulling her up as he drapes her arm over his shoulders, holding her so she isn’t putting any weight on her bad ankle. King holds onto her other hand, the quick pitter patter of his claws on the hardwood below keeping in time with their longer strides, clinging to her the same way he has ever since they woke up.
When the trio first left her old room, King had tried to wedge himself between Luz and Hunter, as if he was trying to protect her from The Golden Guard – as if Hunter could ever a danger to her, as if he wasn’t the only thing that was ever safe – but King quickly shuffled to her other side at the fearful and panicked expressions that appeared on both their faces. Luz only felt a little guilty about forcing him to move, leaning further into Hunter, before squeezing King’s hand again.
Every step they take down the hall echoes in her ears, getting louder and louder as they slowly make their way forwards – Luz thinks she can hear King trying to talk to her, but she can’t bring herself to focus on the words, her attention taken in by the hallway surrounding them.
Memories begin to fill her vision – memories of running down this very passageway, clad in a black cloak and cape, past framed images of King frowning, dressed in a frilly pink bonnet as he sits in his a chair with a snickering Eda – alongside pictures of a young Eda dressed in the same pink bonnet, beside her sister in a blue one.
Luz watches herself jump down the staircase, only now noticing the dust and grime that falls off the traffic cone above her, caking the walls beside her – before another image of herself and King run up the stairs and past her, the pictures on the wall morphing into ones with her and King and Eda together, smiling and laughing as they brew potions, with King still wearing his frilly pink bonnet.
Luz can’t help but smile herself.
She’s learned time and time again not to trust memories, especially not nice ones like these – but sometimes it’s just easier to fall into them. Sometimes it’s easier to just pretend that it’s real.
By the time they make it to the top of the staircase, Luz is still lost in her visions – the group can barely make it past the first step before she winces, the drop down putting too much pressure on her leg. She can feel Hunter’s grip on her arm tighten, his guilt at allowing her to get hurt coming through in that one action, but she just shakes her head at him and moves to continue down the stairs.
The pain is enough to bring her back to herself, King’s voice becoming clearer, finally able to focus on what’s he's saying, glad that she was able to hide her pain well enough from King so as to not cut off his conversation – Luz herself not noticing the flinch that had come from the tiny demon at her pain, forcing himself to keep talking, for her sake.
“ – so the eastern stuffie front has been relatively quiet, which is especially surprising since the Duchess of Fluff loves to enter battles she shouldn’t be involved in. I guess she’s still recovering from her defeat at Lord Ducky’s hand.” Luz turns at the mention of the rubber duck, and she can feel King vibrate at the attention. “He loves to fight – he actually started the war with François. They’ve been going at it for – ”
“Lord Ducky?” Luz interrupts, her mind still trying to catch up with the conversation. “When did he get a promotion?” Her question sends King beaming, so happy that his sister has come back – so so happy that she’s here again, with how withdrawn she’s been. “He only owned Rubber Island before, right? Then again, when the war’s been going on for a year, I guess anythi – ”
“A – a year?” King cuts her off, his surprise snapping her mouth shut. “They’ve only been fighting for a couple of days.” An incredulous look crosses over Luz’s face, before she remembers that it only has been a few days for everyone else. This time, she doesn’t miss the flinch from King, though he’s able to quickly smooth over his expression.
“I-I mean – yeah! When Madame Swan gave up her throne, Lord Ducky ended up inheriting the kingdom! He got really lucky.” Luz doesn’t say anything else, although the tilt of her head lets him know that she’s still listening. “I don’t see him winning, though. Like, Lord Ducky doesn’t have much experience as a king, and François still has a favour from the Amphibians to call in – y’know, ever since the Ducky family betrayed them…”
Luz can feel Hunter perk up at the mention of Amphibians, his head turning to face King as he continues to talk about the delicate and intricate political situations of the Plush Kingdoms. She can almost the hear the gears turning in his head, fighting between wanting to talk about something he’s passionate about, not wanting to interrupt King, the fear and desire to share a part of himself, if he’s even worthy to have a conversation with him –
Luz nudges him slightly, pulling him out of his head, before tilting her own head towards King, letting him know it’s okay to talk to him. Hunter lets out a soft glare, not wanting to interrupt, but Luz just pouts, pleading with him – eventually garnering a sigh from Hunter as Luz internally cheers at winning their silent conversation.
“King? You – you said something about Amphibians. Are frogs a part of that?” Hunter asks, King pausing his description on General Ducky’s poor battle plans to look up at him warily, wondering where this question came from. “Be – because I have – had – a plushie – I think he was an Amphibian warrior. Pink, with green goggles, thin arms and legs. You think – do you know him?”
Sprig, Luz thinks to herself. She remembers how Hunter would talk about his plushie, one of the few pops of colour in his room, nearly drowned out by the drab beige and grey of his Uncle’s decoration. She remembers the happy look on his face as he talked about getting it as a gift from Lilith, back when he was just the Emperor’s nephew – the first and last nice thing Luz can say she did for him. She knows how much that plush means to him.
Hunter’s voice is nervous, not only to be talking to the demon he once captured and threatened, but also scared to admit any sense of weakness in front of anyone that isn’t Luz.
Thankfully, all of his worries are assauged the moment Hunter mentions his own plush, King’s guarded expression dropping almost instantly, his eyes shining with wonder and curiosity and joy – the mere mention of a genuine interest and appreciation of plushies soldiers enough to change how the demon sees the former Golden Guard.
“Oooo! I don’t know a pink frog, but I know a purple one! Or, I guess she’s not a frog yet… she’s mostly a ball right now.” Luz can hear the excitement creeping into his voice again, can feel how his arms swing around in hers as he looks up at Hunter with stars in his eyes. “I guess she’d be a badpole? Oh, maybe they’re related! Maybe he’s her brother! But – why aren’t they together?”
“Uh… maybe he left for a mission?” A thoughtful look crosses over Hunter’s face. “A secret mission to infiltrate the… uh – the Cotton Empire! Yeah! And that’s why he’s with me! He needed a… witch on the inside?” Luz can feel the way stiffens at calling himself a witch, still unsure if he’s doing this conversation thing right, still worried if King even wants him to speak, still –
“That makes sense!” King shines at his words, Hunter almost having to cover his eyes at his brightness. “The Cotton Empire has been planning to overthrow the Plush Alliance for decades now! And the best way to learn about their plans is with a frog on the inside!”
“...y-yeah.” Hunter lets out a soft smile, and Luz can’t help but smile herself. The two continue talking, with King excitedly sharing every detail he has on the Amphibians, along with any rumours about Madame Swan’s secret rebellion and the Cotton Empire, Hunter taking in every word, ready to relay this critical information to his new ‘informant’ – Luz can see the sadness in Hunter’s eyes as he think about the plush he hasn’t been able to see in a year, may never be able to see again.
Their conversation continues as they reach the bottom of the staircase, the three of them passing by Hunter’s makeshift nest on the living room couch – Luz giving Hunter a questioning glance at the small pile of glass shards beside it, to which he just shrugs and motions at his injured shoulder before turning back to King.
They make their way into the kitchen, King’s and Hunter’s voices echoing out through the open window, the three only in the entrance for a few seconds before The Owl Lady comes barreling down the stairs, rushing past them, panting slightly as she leans over the counter.
Luz can feel Hunter freeze beside her, his arm tightening across her shoulder at the sudden movement, Luz returning the squeeze to try and comfort him. She looks up to tell off Eda, but stops herself, noticing a set of splotchy red eyes, with barely hidden tear tracks running down her face.
“So? Who’s hungry?” Eda spreads her arms out, making a show of her aloofness before Luz can bring it up. King squeaks as he lets go of Luz’s hand, rushing over to his high chair, chanting food! food! food! Eda quirks an eyebrow at the two kids still standing in the middle of the doorframe, the former Golden Guard’s eyes trained to the floor.
Hunter’s feet are glued to the ground, and with Luz still glued to Hunter, the two stand unmoving from their position. A moment passes, Eda looking on confusedly, waiting for them to make their way to a seat, her worry that she’s frightened them growing, before she realizes that Hunter’s not actually frozen in fear – he’s waiting. He’s waiting for permission.
“You can – uh – go ahead and. Sit down. It’s fine.” Eda coughs, unsure of the best way to tell him he doesn’t need to ask permission to sit down. Hunter just nods before she can convey any of that, almost running the closest chair, pulling it out and nearly throwing Luz onto it, before he walks over to his own chair, looking up nervously at Eda again, as if he couldn’t dare to sit. Eda just smiles at him again, and he gingerly takes a seat.
“So. Now that everyone’s, uh, ready. What’s on the menu for today?” Eda forces an air of casualness into her voice, one that nobody really believes. Her eyes dart between Luz and Hunter, both of whom look very confused. “Uh… what would you like to eat?” The two continue to stare at her like she’s growing feathers – Eda checks to make sure she isn’t – and Eda doesn’t quite get why .
It’s just food, right?
“I want griffin eggs!” King slams his claws on the table, drawing everybody’s attention to him. Eda silently mouths a ‘thank you’ to King, the demon knowing how much time she spent on cooking those eggs – not wanting them to go to waste, but also making a decision just so Luz and Hunter wouldn’t have to.
“Great! I can get y’all som – ”
“I can help!”
Hunter shoots up, nearly knocking over his seat as he rushes over to Eda’s side, the fridge not even yet opened. Eda tries to shoo him away, not wanting either him or Luz to do any work, but the former guard is already rummaging through her cupboards, doors opening and closing in rapid succession in his search for dishes. By the time Eda pulls out the two-day old griffin eggs, four plates have been arranged on the counter in front of her, with Hunter standing at attention beside them.
Luz fidgets in her seat as Eda spoons the eggs onto the plates, the kitchen island separating her and Hunter – the idea of any obstacle existing between her and Hunter sending a spike of anxiety through her chest. The way Hunter rushes over to her, discoloured griffin eggs stacked high, it’s clear he’s feeling the same way. Hunter gives her a pointed look as he puts it down, and Luz just raises an eyebrow, as if to say I know.
Hunter exhales, ending their silent conversation before making his way over to King, a similar plate of eggs in his hands. King yells out a loud thanks as he drops it, and Luz can see the way he tries to suppress a flinch, before dipping his head in a nod, mumbling out a thanks, a faint pink colouring the tips of his ears.
He quickly goes over to his own seat, placing the eggs in front of him as he pulls himself up to the table, hand hovering over his fork before he pulls it down to his lap, spine straight as he sits at attention – as if once again he’s waiting for permission.
“It’s okay. You can eat. You don’t need to wait for me to say it.” Hunter slouches at Eda’s soft words, his soldier’s posture dropping. He eyes the eggs warily, fork in hand, still not moving to actually pick them up. “Well, go on! It doesn’t look that bad, right? I mean, it’s not castle food, but it’s still somethin’.” Hunter just grimaces, and Eda turns to her apprentice, hoping to get her to convince him to eat, just to see the same expression mirrored on her face.
“Luz? Everything alright?” She doesn’t say anything – she doesn’t have the heart to tell her that it’s not alright.
Luz is scared. She’s scared of what this meal might tell her. She’s scared that as soon as she tries to take a bite, it’ll just – it’ll be like it always has been, that this will have just been another memory, another trick – another way to torture her. She doesn’t want that to be true, doesn’t want to go back – she wants this to be real, wants to stay here for just one second more.
But she sees the way Eda and King look at her – with pity, adoration, concern, love, hope – and she can’t disappoint them. Even if it’s not really them.
Luz goes to take a bite, and –
“Hunter? Can we – can we please slow down?”
“No! Not yet! We can’t stop yet!”
“But we’ve been running for – for hours now! Surely we – haah – we’ve gotten far enough away by now!”
“Look, human! If you want to stop and get captured by Unc – by Belos, then be my guest!”
“Ay, dios mío…” Luz continues to grumble under her breath as Hunter drags her along, weaving between the trees of Belos’ Mindscape, gripping her arm tightly as they run, obviously never actually going to act on his threat of leaving her behind.
They’d been running for a few hours now, jumping between memories and forests, trying to escape from The Emperor. It’s been about a week since Luz was teleported here alongside Hunter. About a week since they’ve been running, never taking a break for longer than necessary until they move again. About a week since the two of them were trapped, forced to live through the torture that Belos had put The Isles – put Hunter – through. About a week since they learned that Hunter’s entire life was a lie.
About a week since Luz learned just who Emperor Belos really was. About a week since she learned what Phillip Wittebane was planning to do with the Day of Unity. About a week since she learned that she helped him. That she gave him magic. That she was complicit in genocide – it’s already been a week theyneedneed to getout of here to stop it she needs to fix hermistake itsherfaultherfaulther –
Luz is pulled out of her thoughts by Hunter, who jerks her forward when she begins to flag, forcing her to keep pace with him. She tries to tell him to slow down, but is unable to get the words out, her own heavy breaths cutting her off, her legs like jelly as she stumbles through the woods.
She doesn’t know how much longer they’re forced to sprint – seconds and minutes and hours blending together – until suddenly she stops, nearly crashing into the back of Hunter, the former guard standing still as he takes a look around at the clearing, his eyes darting between various picture frames.
“You could – you could warn me if you’re – ” Luz has to take a moment to catch her breath, unable to finish the sentences through her exhaustion – how is Hunter barely even panting? “If you’re gonna stop in the – the middle of nowhere!”
“It’s not my fault you weren’t trained properly.” Hunter scoffs, tearing his eyes away from one of the memories to look down at Luz’s hunched form, returning the glare she sends his way – Hunter is still grabbing her arm, holding her up as she recovers, clearly having stopped just so she can get breath back, his actions betraying his seemingly uncaring words.
It takes a while, but Luz is eventually able to bring herself out of her exhaustion, her breaths steadying as she inhales one last time before straightening out, lifting her hands off her knees to take a look around at the clearing they’ve stopped in.
Luz has been getting used to sights such as this, gray trees surrounding gray grass, a gray shroud enveloping it all. Wooden frames hang from the various flora scattered around them – so many terrible memories formed and built up from centuries of stolen life.
The pictures hung here seem more recent. Images of the dull halls of the castle fill the background of most of the portraits surrounding them. Various figures stand within – coven Heads getting crowned their new positions, prisoners standing trial before petrification, Hunter kneeling in front of Belos before his next mission, his next scolding, his next beating, his next –
Luz forces herself to tear her eyes away, the thought of anybody being abused like that almost too much to bear, the images replaying over and over again in her head as she turns to look at Hunter, his gaze frozen once again at one of the memories – him kneeling as he begs for forgiveness, and only getting more wounds in return.
She wants to reach out, wants to wrench his head away from whatever torture he’s putting himself through, but her hand freezes just above his arm, unsure of how best to help him, not wanting a repeat of the last time she touched him without warning – her ribcage still aching from the impact of his elbow. Instead she just looks around, wanting to find anything to distract him, to distract both of them, when her eyes catch onto a memory, and she squeaks in delight.
“Hunter, look! It’s – It’s a party! Or a banquet! Or ball or – or something! Whatever, just – come on!”
“Wh – hey!”
Hunter’s yelp is cut off as Luz grabs him by the arm and drags him – how does he like it? – towards the image hanging behind them, nearly falling flat on her face as they leap into the frame, stumbling into the great hall, the artificial light of the room blinding her as she stands up.
“This place is huge!” Awe seeps into Luz’s voice as she spins to look around at the room. The banquet hall is absolutely enormous, golden walls stretching out farther than her field of vision, never able to see both ends of the room at the same time. Ceilings just as golden rise high – higher than even the roof of the castle looks from outside. Tall, thin windows are spaced out evenly along the walls, reaching up to the ceiling above them, the darkness outside the only reprieve from the blinding chandeliers hanging above them.
The room is filled with guests – it’s as if everybody living on The Boiling Isles is gathered in this one place. Coven members and leaders, teachers and students, families and soldiers, all squished together as if they couldn’t be anywhere else but here. Knowing Belos, maybe that was true. Luz loves it anyways, taking in the sights and sounds, as if this party was meant for her.
“It’s a big castle.” Hunter stands up beside her, dusting himself off as he stands up next to her, trying his best to look aloof at being dragged around and falling flat on his face, but his annoyed pout betrays him. “I doubt you’ve seen every part of it.” Luz just smiles back, glad her distraction worked, but her attention is taken once again by the sounds of the other guests around her.
“I wonder what this party is for?” Luz questions as she takes another look around the room, picking up various conversations around her, mutterings of parties and invitations, witches and prisoners, food and drink – when’s the last time she was able to eat something? – floating into her ears, not quite telling her what this gathering is about. “I mean, it seems pretty big, but I don’t know what it could be about. What do you think?”
“It was a celebration of a successful raid.” Hunter answers, his own eyes scanning the room, looking around for any exits should they need to escape. “Coven heads Eberwolf and Darius arrested one of the biggest holdings of wild witches in years. Belos wanted to hold a banquet in their honour, a day before their petrifications.” He says it so casually, like he’s reading off a report, and not speaking about the murder of dozens of innocents.
“Oh.” Luz’s voice is quiet, processing the thought of so many people coming together to celebrate the death of others. She can see the way Hunter’s face falls again, his own mind rewiring itself once again, flipping what he once believed was just, mourning these witches as if he was the one who captured them, who damned them to this – before another thought crosses her mind.
“Wait, you know what this party was about? Were you here?”
“Yeah. I was.” His voice is still low, but he tilts his head to one of the room’s edges. “Stationed at the west exit.” Luz looks to where Hunter is pointing, seeing a youngest Golden Guard standing watch.
A yellow mask covers his face, the cowl over his head blocking everybody from seeing under it. The cape behind him drags along the ground, his fourteen-year-old body still too short for his uniform. He stands stock still – one could almost mistake him for a statue if it wasn’t for the steady rotation of his body as he scans the hall over and over again, artificial staff in one hand, a sparkling glass of something in the other.
“Looks boring.”
“It’s my job, Human. Was. Was my job.” Hunter exhales before he continues. “Doesn’t matter if it was boring, it’s what I had to do.” He pauses before he tilts his head to her, a teasing glint in his eyes. “Not everything can be all sunshine and painbows like your Azila books.”
“¡AY! Azura is a critically acclaimed series, and deserves to be treated as such!” Luz indignantly sputters, trying to shove him, but stumbles as he dodges out of the way, both of their smirks growing wider – wasn’t Luz supposed to be comforting him?
“Besides, there’s nothing wrong with wanting a party to be grand!” She continues, looking back up at him. “The second book had a party! After Azura had saved the dragon from a tyrannical prince, she met with Hecate there, and they shared a dance! It was beautiful! Magical! And it! Was! Not! Boring!”
“Don’t you have any good stories about parties? Before you were just ‘doing your job’?” She puts that last part in quotations, and Hunter looks off to the side, seemingly lost in thought.
“There was one party I can remember going to – before I was the Golden Guard.” He responds, a slight smile on his face. “When Belos still wanted his nephew to make some public appearances. It was the first time I had met the Blight Twins.”
“I thought they were so titan-damned annoying.” Despite the harsh words, Luz can see the light in his eyes. “The two dragged me away from Unc – Belos’ side, asking me all sorts of questions about what it was like in the castle, what it was like being a prince – they never shut up. The only way I could get them to stop was by answering their incessant questioning.”
“Eventually, they got bored and pulled me over to the punch bowl.” Hunter turns to his side – the side of the room where his past self isn’t – presumably to the spot where the twins brought him all those years ago, his expression turning mischievous as he continues. “They put a few drops of some potion in there. I tried to get them to stop, but honestly the way Darius’ mouth set ablaze, dropping his cup and staining his shoes made me glad I didn’t.”
Luz can’t help the laugh that escapes her throat.
“So you do know how to have fun.” Luz wiggles her eyebrows after catching herself, Hunter sputtering and shaking his head vehemently at the very insinuation that a prank could ever be fun. She giggles again, her face softening before she continues, poking his forehead. “You know, I’m glad there are at least some happy memories in there.” Hunter scowls, before letting a smile appear on his own face.
“Yeah. Me too.”
Luz grins, glad to hear of at least one happy memory that Hunter had, ones that weren’t filled with abuse. When his smirk eventually drops, schooling his face back into something neutral as he continues to look for potential exits. Luz follows suit, her eyes washing over the room, watching as the various guests flit back and forth, her eyes marking every gap as they open and close, hoping to see a glimpse of an exit, or of a weapon, or of a person, of Lillith or Eda or Amit –
She sees it.
A table.
With food.
Suddenly, everything else falls away.
Luz’s body moves before her brain can register, weaving between guests, bumping into them – almost knocking a few over – as she rushes over to the middle of the room. She thinks she can hear Hunter calling to her, telling her to wait, but she can’t bring herself to stop now that she’s been presented with food, her mind finally recognizing why she’s so dead set on getting there.
She hasn’t eaten a single thing since she’s been brought into the Mindscape.
She doesn’t know how she hadn’t realized it until now, how she hadn’t realized that it’s been a week since she’s eaten – maybe she was too panicked to notice, too focused on running away, too scared for Hunter’s life, or her own. Maybe it was magic, or adrenaline, or just pure thoughtlessness –
It doesn’t matter, really, why she hasn’t eaten in so long. It doesn’t matter that she’s not hungry, that she’s not any weaker for it, doesn’t feel any worse for not eating. All that matters now is there’s food in front of her now, and she’s finally going to eat something.
A few more steps, a few more dashes, and she’s suddenly standing in front of the table. The spread is worthy of a king – or an Emperor, she supposes. Rows upon rows of freshly butchered fruits, delicately cut spider cheeses, and flutes of bloody champagne fill all four corners. If she wasn’t so desperate to eat, she would’ve been in awe at the selection in front of her. She would've been struck with choice paralysis on what she wanted to eat.
Thankfully, her hands make the decision for her. She reaches out, grabs the first thing in front of her, and shoves it in her mouth.
She can’t tell exactly what she’s eating just by the flavour – which is a little weird, but she chalks it it up to Demon Realm food being relatively unrecognizable, and continues to eat, looking down at the fried apple drumsticks in her hands – hasn’t she tried this before? Why wouldn’t she recognize it?
Something seems off about this.
She can’t quite tell what it is, instead bringing the drumstick up to her mouth for a third bite. She hasn’t eaten for an entire week. Most people who’ve been starved for that long would probably die, or at least have become severely malnourished – the only thing she’s felt is exhausted from the amount of running she’s done, and the lack of sleep she’s gotten. She can’t even remember a moment where her stomach grumbl –
Wait.
She can’t taste the food.
She goes to finish the apple, leaving behind the last bit of boney core, but as it hits her tongue, she realizes it’s completely flavourless. It’s like it’s not even in her mouth. She knows she’s chewing it, she feels her jaw working, but it’s as if the texture of it doesn’t exist. As she swallows it, she doesn’t feel any satisfaction from it, no less hungry than when she started eating it.
It tastes like nothing. It feels like nothing. It is nothing.
Hunter catches up with her at that moment, his anger is mixed with concern as his eyes dart from the apple drumstick core in her hand to her face.
“Human! Why would you run like – what were you thinking?!” His face betrays the worry he’s trying so hard to mask with fury, his hands clenched tightly to his sides to prevent himself from shaking her shoulders violently. “What if you were caught!?”
“It doesn't taste like anything…” Luz ignores his cries, muttering to herself as she reaches for more food. A block of scream cheese disintegrates into nothing in her mouth. A handful of pophorns pass down her throat like less than air. She’s stopped mid lunge as she reaches for a slice of booberry pie, a hand wrapped around her wrist.
“I don’t – it’s not – why?” Luz whips around to fully face Hunter, his panicked angry expression flinching back at the sudden movement. He goes to question what exactly has gotten into her, but he’s interrupted by her grabbing his shoulders and shaking him violently, little images of Flapjack spinning around his head.
“It tastes like nothing! Like – like it’s not even there! I don’t – what?” Her confused yells die down, turning into mumbles as she stops shaking Hunter, keeping her hands on his shoulders as he stops moving, holding a hand up to his head with a groan as he tries to orient himself back to this party. “I’ve had apple drumsticks before, so I know what they taste like, but then why – I don’t get it – i haven’t eaten I should be dead I don’t kno – ”
“LUZ!” Hunter’s shout snaps Luz out of her tirade, his use of her name so few and far between that the shock of hearing it alone is enough to bring her back. She doesn’t know what it is – maybe it’s the seriousness, the assuredness in his voice, maybe it's the fact he called her Luz, but she just has a feeling that he’s he’s gonna tell her that it’s okay, that she’s wrong, tha –
“You’re right.” Huh? “The food does taste like nothing.”
What?
“What?”
“Food doesn’t exist in Mindscapes. At least, not in a way that actually matters.” Hunter continues on, like he didn’t even notice she said anything. “It’s impossible to eat anything in here.”
“You know, there were actually studies that looked into what actually exists in Mindscapes. One of those studies was with food!” Hunter’s eyes begin to shine as he speaks, getting the same excited look he gets on his face whenever he gets to talk about things he’s researched – Luz can’t bring herself to be drawn into it, at least this time. “There are records of people trying to relive certain meals they had as a kid in their Mindscapes, only to come out disappointed when they couldn’t taste anything.”
“But, when people were brought back out of the Mindscape, they found they weren’t any more hungry than when they entered. Even when they were in there for days, there was no change.” Hunter’s hands begin to gesture around wildly as he continues, fingers pointing in all directions. “People don’t get hungry, but they also don’t need to eat! There’s no known reason for why this is the case, but there are theories, mostly having to do with how those memories don’t exist in real time.”
“I guess we’ll never know for sure, now. Research into Mindscapes has become heavily regulated, with only memory extraction being legal.” Hunter gains a dark look dark across his face, arms dropping before continuing. “Then again, research into Grimwalkers is supposedly illegal, and look at me.”
“Why?”
“I mean, nobody knows why, I alread – ”
“No, no. I – I just – why?!” Hunter sighs, a look of sympathy flashing across his face, before his expression turns unsure, still not so great at this ‘comforting’ thing.
“Look, Luz. Even with my extra research – which was totally legal by the way – the books I did have access to were extremely limited. I truly don’t know why.” He puts a hand on her shoulder, trying to give her a smile, trying to say the right thing. “What I do know is that we don’t need to eat to survive. And I think that’s a good thing.”
That’s the wrong thing to say.
“Survival?! It’s – ” Luz knocks his hand away as she glares at him, unshed tears forming in her eyes. “It’s not about survival! It’s about not being able to taste anything! Not being able to eat anything! Not being able to – ”
“What are you talking about? It is about survival. It’s all we can do to survive! Or did you forget about my crazy Uncle still chasing us!” Hunter cuts her off, lucky that the other guests wouldn’t remember them, converting his disappointment that he couldn’t cheer her up into anger. “Until we can find a way out of here and stop the Day of Unity, then all we need to do is survive. If we have to sacrifice food to do it, then so be it.”
“Sacrifice food?! Wha -that’s easy for you to say!” Luz sneers, her rage at the situation turning into something more sinister. “Then again, you wouldn’t know anything about good food! All you’ve grown up with is the Emperor’s Coven gruel and Belos’ slop. You wouldn’t know a good meal if it slapped you across the face!”
Luz can almost feel the temperature in the room drop as she says this, a flash of hurt appearing on Hunter’s face before it turns icy.
“You’re right. I wouldn’t.” His face is dark, his voice quiet as it echoes around the busy hall. “I was never allowed the privilege of eating anything other than slop. Belos made sure of it.” Hunter turns, his eyes scanning the room one last time until he finally finds the portrait leading to the outside world. “We’re leaving, human. Unless you want to spend your time eating more nothing.”
Luz can only feel a little guilty as she watches him stalk off before following, an angry look still on her face.
He really wouldn’t get it. Food is important to her. So important. It’s a way for her and her mom to connect to their culture. It was one of the first ways her and Eda bonded trying to find things she could eat. It’s the best subject for puns with King. It was one of the few ways she could remember the Human Realm – remember her Dad. She didn’t know if she could live without those connections.
Then again, Hunter was right. She didn’t need to live – She needed to survive. If she wanted to stop the Day of Unity – if she wanted to save her friends and family, save the place she’s been calling a second home – she would have to survive. And if she needed to give up food to save them, then so be it.
But when she gets out, she’s gonna have the biggest, baddest, best feast of her life. Luz can promise that.
----------
In all honesty, the griffin eggs don’t taste that great.
Eda has never been a great cook – most of her skills in the kitchen are in potion brewing – and it’s clear that this meal especially is on the lower end of her spectrum of quality. The eggs weren’t mixed well, bits of white and yellow spread throughout the scramble. They’re overcooked, drying her mouth as soon as it touches her tongue. The boiling sea salt Eda uses is still too strong for her palette, and she used even more than usual. And they’re at least a day old, the stale taste coming through almost too clearly.
It’s the best meal Luz has ever had in her life.
Luz can’t help the tears that fall from her face as she takes her first bite, her eyes lighting up as she picks up her plate, no longer wary of the food, eating faster than she ever has in her life, the first meal she’s eaten in months, in a year – these salty, overcooked, stale eggs, made by her guardian, her mentor, her Eda – the biggest, baddest, best feast that she promised herself all those months ago.
She couldn’t dream of it being anything else.
She quickly finishes her plate before standing up, rushing over to Eda, a silent plea for seconds pushing past her lips. Eda looks surprised at how quickly she ate the food, and even more surprised at the intensity in which she’s asking for more – the first strong emotion from either of the kids that isn't fear, anger, or sadness – but quickly gets up to fix her another plate.
Luz chokes out a thanks as she’s handed the plate before she goes to eat again, not even sitting down as she stabs the eggs with a fork, starting again with almost as much speed as the first plate, tears still falling from her eyes as she goes back to ask for thirds, Eda quickly filling her plate once again.
This time, Luz eats slower, taking time to savour each bite, the dry, salty eggs almost forcing her to take a sip of water – water! She can actually drink water! She almost regrets taking the third plate, an ache in her stomach overtaking her body, but she continues on regardless, not wanting to waste a single crumb – not wanting to waste a single drop of food ever again.
She manages to finish her third plate, downing it with one last cough and a drink of water, tears of joy still streaming down her face as she smiles wide, gratitude streaming out of her mouth, thank you thank youthankyou as she tries to wipe her face dry, fresh tears renewing themselves every second.
She hears a chair from behind her slide backwards, a blur of yellow entering her vision as Hunter stands beside her, eyes set to the floor as he holds his plate in front of Eda, shyly asking for seconds as well.
Hunter, who had once bragged about how little he needed to eat, how he could sometimes go for weeks surviving on rations and water alone. How he couldn’t eat a lot, wasn’t allowed to eat. How he needed to stay skinny to be an effective soldier, how his body turned that thought into an order, how he physically can’t eat a lot.
Now, at least for today, with the promise of real food in front of him, he can ignore that demand.
King, not to be outdone, asks for seconds as well, just as Hunter sits down with his own plate, even though he’s yet to finish his first plate. Eda indulges him anyways, stacking his plate high with fresh, old eggs. King grins before turning to Hunter, challenging him to a race to see who can finish their plate first. Hunter just sputters as Eda counts down, the 3, 2, 1, GO!! barely even registering to him.
The demon grabs his eggs by the handful, throwing his fork to the side as he stuffs his cheeks. Hunter turns to look at Luz confusedly, and she just just shrugs, garnering a scowl from him before he goes at his own plate – slowly at first, but picking up the pace as the size of King’s pile approaches his own. The two quickly match each other, a look of determination on both of their faces, King’s competitiveness and Hunter’s need to prove himself taking them both over, neither one wanting to lose.
Eda holds a hand over her mouth, holding back her laughter, until King begins to choke on a small piece of egg. The Owl Lady rushes over to his side, dislodging the food with a light smack to his back – the tiny demon going right back to his plate as soon as he can. He can only manage one last mouthful as Hunter slams down his fork, an emphatic DONE escaping from his lips as he looks triumphantly towards King.
Complaints erupt from King, shouts of no fair! and you cheated! rushing between his wehs as Hunter looks smugly at her younger brother, and that’s all that Luz can take before a loud –
“HA!”
– escapes her throat.
One loud laugh followed by another as Luz doubles over, nearly falling out of her seat as she takes in the antics of the two in front of her. Eda quickly follows suit, dropping the hand in front of her mouth as she cackles loudly, slapping her hands to her knees as he tries her best not to tip over as well.
King throws another tantrum in his chair, flailing his arms wildly – flailing a lot more than he usually would, making sure to play it up, just as long as everyone can keep laughing – as he demands a rematch. Hunter just stares at him before he bursts into laughter, his guffaws echoing around the kitchen as it joins the others. King just screeches in indignation until even he can’t hold back his own giggles.
The sounds of all their laughter echo around The Owl House – laughter so loud that if there were any neighbours, they would be worried that someone cast a comedy spell on them. Luz laughs for so long it hurts – her voice crackles as her throat is worked and overworked, her back aches from how long she’s been hunched over, and her lungs wheeze at the thought of having to expel any more air.
It’s the best feeling in the world.
As the laughter dies down, Luz wiping tears from her eyes yet again – this time from joy, pure joy – her vision coming back to see the others doing the same, smiles plastered across all of their faces – Hunter’s is small, but still there – Luz can’t keep the smile off her own face.
She’s dreamed of this exact moment. Being back at The Owl House, both of them being free from the torture of the Mindscape, being beside her family – even if some of them are missing. At some point, she stopped believing in it. Stopped believing that they could ever get out – that her and Hunter could find their happiness again. Surviving was all she could focus on, and eventually, she started to believe that was enough. But now, surrounded by laughter and joy and love –
Maybe she can start believing in something better again.