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It started as all bad things start: over dinner.
Sunghoon had his head down in his bowl of kalguksu, barely paying attention to the conversation around him. He only started listening because he heard one of them say his name- or something that sounded like his name- but not garnering enough interest to look up from his meal. The soup was still piping hot, and he didn't want to let go of his bite of noodles.
Their stream of consciousness goes from innocent to existential to indecent in a span of three people bouncing their remaining firing neurons off of each others' firing neurons. Hours of practice coupled with individual practices after will do that to a man, and the very welcome knowledge that they aren't being filmed means they can swear and yell and yawn with their mouths full to their heart's content. Riki had his leg up on the chair, bent over his whole bowl like someone might steal the food from him. Sunghoon was sure he looked the same.
He heard his name, and then he didn't. And then he heard it again, and he looked up from his bowl carefully. Across from Sunghoon was Heeseung, who immediately stilled when they made eye contact, his gaze slowly and blatantly drifting down to Sunghoon's mouth- and Sunghoon knew exactly what he was thinking. It didn't help that he could feel the soup dripping from his lips, so his tongue flicked out on instinct to catch it, and of course Heeseung looked two seconds away from jumping Sunghoon at that very table.
"Stop eye-fucking him, hyung," Jake said from beside Sunghoon.
"No one told you to watch," Heeseung replied without hesitation, eyes never leaving Sunghoon. He could feel his face warm in a way that couldn’t be attributed to the food, and he broke eye contact to sip his soup.
"And no one told you to get bricked up in a family restaurant, you freak."
"Who?" Jungwon piped up. He always managed to hear everything and nothing, and his nosey nature meant if he heard something, he had to know.
“Heeseung hyung.”
“I’m not, look,” he argued, followed by the distinct sound of the chair scraping against the floor.
“Well?” Jake asked near immediately after.
“I’m- I don’t know, I’m not looking!”
“Who wouldn’t?” Jay said.
“Look?!”
Jay clicked his tongue. “Get hard seeing Sunghoon.”
"How do you even make it through the day when you live with me?" Sunghoon managed to ask around his full mouth.
"With much difficulty, my love." He fought back the scowl that threatened to mar his face as a way to hide his blush. Sunghoon chewed slowly, eyes moving back and forth as the consciousness jumped. Maybe he shouldn't have looked up after all.
"He just- he looks good with his mouth full," Heeseung tried. Jungwon's chopsticks slipped from his hand, clattering onto the table noisily, as if they also could not believe what Heeseung just said. "He's eating well- don't look at me like that!"
"Hyung, you looked at him crazy to just say he eats well."
"You really did," Sunoo said. Riki snorted from the other end of the table, taking delight like the gremlin he is at the eldest being ganged up on. Heeseung spluttered, pointing his chopsticks at Sunoo.
"Now why were you watching too?"
"Hard to miss when you're doing it so loud. You might as well have started face fucking Sunghoon right here, he would've let you."
"Sunoo hyung!" Jungwon was no prude, but Sunghoon knew his position as leader made him more attuned to posterity than the rest of them.
"He wouldn't," Jay sighed. "He's so pretty but he doesn't know how to take it."
Sunghoon's eyebrows knitted at their referring to him as if he wasn't sitting right there. Not that he could add anything substantial: he just took another bite. The soup is so hot he nearly spat it out back into his bowl, but he's sure that would have accelerated the situation.
"What are you talking about? Sunghoon takes it," Sunoo said. He was glad someone at the table would defend his honor. "Maybe he just doesn't with you?"
Jake choked on his laugh, hand clapping over his mouth to stop from spitting his rice out. Riki fell into his own fit of giggles watching it unfold: the bumping of Jake’s elbow on the table and knocking off the spoon onto the floor, and the subsequent inability to pick it back up because he was trying to control his laughter.
Unperturbed by Jake, Jay looked at Sunoo and said, "He does, thank you very much, but he gags and cries and then stops trying. And then he just wants to be fucked."
"Well, isn't that cute though?" Heeseung chimed in, eyes darting lovingly over to Sunghoon as he chews slowly on his mouthful.
"Isn't it?" Sunoo exclaimed excitedly, eyes sparkling like how they do when he eats good food. Sunghoon nudged him with his elbow, and Sunoo looked at him happily, covering his mouth as he cooed at Sunghoon's furrowed brows and cheeks stuffed with noodles.
"Can you guys not do this while we're in public? As much as I love discussing how much Sunghoon sucks-”
“Hey!” Sunghoon cried, nearly choking on his bite.
“-what if someone hears when they walk by? Or the auntie? She could've given us more kimchi." Jungwon scolded.
“And I’m right here!”
Jay looked dead at Sunghoon. "Then defend yourself." Sunghoon tried to think of words but being put on the spot like that made him panic a little, chopsticks stilling inside the bowl. Just as he opened his mouth to say something mean, Jay had cut him off with an, "Exactly. Sunoo’s got a face for being on his knees, you’ve got a face for being on your back."
“That’s facts,” Riki added as the others nodded in agreement.
"What does that even mean?"
“You heard me.”
“No, I don’t think I did,” Sunghoon replied, taunting. “You wanna say it again?”
“Stop,” Jungwon cut in.
“I said-'' Jay started, speaking through Jungwon’s warning. He leaned in over the table slightly, his eyes never faltering like Heeseung’s, voice dropped lower, “-you’re prettiest when you’re taking it like a whore.”
Someone gasped from behind them, causing the whole table to duck their heads down and hide their faces like Sunghoon had originally before he decided to listen to his teammates. We run like cowards, Sunghoon thought. Jungwon was audibly trying to stifle his laughter, and Sunghoon could hear the “I told you so,” spoken into the table.
They refocused on their food, all unconsciously trying to eat as fast as possible so they could get out and save a little face. At least, that’s what Sunghoon was aiming for, since the conversation was against his favor.
“I’m just saying,” Jay said, almost too quiet to not hear if they weren’t attuned to his mumbling, “that Sunghoon would be such a triple threat if he could suck dick.”
"Why don’t we teach him?" Heeseung suggested gently. "Train away his gag reflex. Imagine how cute he'd be, mouth full of-"
"Stop! My kimchi, hyung!" Jungwon whined. “We get it.”
“Do we?” Riki asked.
“Don’t we?”
“What are the other two?” Jake asked Jay. The both of them looked over to Jungwon, who was giving them an unreadable look while slowly shaking his head no.
"You just want him to give you head," Riki said to Heeseung.
"Uh, yeah. But unlike Jay, I love Sunghoon the way he is, bad head and all. And I am offering myself up to teach him. Are any of you people doing the same?”
“God, where do I even start? Ki-”
Underneath Riki’s arguing, Jay said, "He'll learn in due time."
Due time was now.
It's only a few days after that conversation, and Sunghoon finds himself in Jay's low lit room with an expensive candle burning on the dresser, next to the bed where Jay sits. If Sunghoon were more assertive, he wouldn't even be here- but the bruise to his pride knowing everyone thinks he sucks at head is, well, bruising. He doesn't have to be the best, he just has to not be the worst.
And when push comes to shove, Sunghoon will get on his knees.
Jay is patient until he's not- like right now, how his cock is hard against his thigh and waiting for Sunghoon to do something about it, but Sunghoon has been busy trying to calm himself down enough to not gag the second he takes Jay into his mouth.
"What're you waiting for, hmm?" Jay asks carefully. Many years of living with him tells Sunghoon he's a little irritated and trying to will his words to be kinder. Sunghoon appreciates the effort silently, taking Jay into his hand and stroking him.
He kisses the tip first, licking the precum from his lips before closing them around the head entirely. This much is simple, this much any of them will let Sunghoon do. Getting his mouth down, and subsequently up again, any further than half is where the challenge is, and why Sunghoon is here in the first place. Sunghoon blames them for not having a mouth sized cock, and they all blame Sunghoon for having a big mouth everywhere except the bedroom. Or bathroom. Or living room.
Even now, Jay's dick is barely halfway into his mouth but the weight on his tongue is what makes him gag. “Hands,” Jay says.
Sunghoon drags his tongue with the movement off, laying another kiss on saliva-soaked skin. He licks up the underside, and then brings a hand up to cover the half of Jay’s dick he couldn’t swallow to stroke him. “See, what’s the difference between me just jacking you off?”
“The difference-” Jay says, a groan cutting off his words when Sunghoon tightens his grip and strokes along the whole length, “- is that you get your mouth on me. And who doesn’t want that?”
Sunghoon hums, pressing his lips onto Jay’s dick so he can feel the vibrations when he does. “But I can still do it like this?” Sunghoon asks, moving lower, until he can lick the base, pointing his tongue to rub it along the seam of his balls.
"You- nnh- know it's not the same." Sunghoon rolls his eyes, taking Jay back into his mouth.
He only goes as far as he’s comfortable, bobbing his head up and down the few inches he’s able to get in. Jay is letting out short huffs, almost like sighs but with less of a dragging exhale, like he’s the slightest bit too far from sinking fully into pleasure. “Hands,” Jay mumbles again, reminding Sunghoon to do something with the rest of his dick.
Sunghoon listens begrudgingly, either only moving his hands as the suckles on the tip, or only moving his head while his fist stays tightened around Jay’s cock. As much as Sunghoon wants to call it retalitatory, it’s simply a skill issue.
Jay scoffs at him. “You think you can get me off like this?” He starts jerking his hips up whenever Sunghoon takes more into his mouth, testing his limit. “How about you go deeper, or we’ll be here forever.”
Sunghoon shakes his head as best as he can, looking up at Jay with knitted brows, as if to tell him please, don’t make me. But Jay is no mind reader, and Sunghoon is currently in no position to protest, so Jay carefully places a hand on the back of Sunghoon’s head and pushes. Not gently enough, though him doing this instead of just fucking his hips forward is nice (it’s the little things, Sunghoon thinks), because Sunghoon gags immediately.
"Relax. Like you're saying 'aah' for the doctor, tongue on the bottom of your mouth. Your throat will open, and you need to keep it like that."
Sunghoon listens, muscles moving like how he was told. Except it's too unfamiliar to keep his throat like that, and he can feel his tongue moving back to the roof of his mouth, sliding over the slit of Jay's dick. He pulls off, telling Jay, “I can’t.”
“Yes, you can. Practice makes perfect.”
“Jay, I really can’t-”
"Try. For me." Sunghoon hesitates, mouth pulling into a pout as he looks up at Jay. "I'll push it in, you just stay relaxed. Yeah?"
Jay moves for him, makes the decision for him- presses the tip of his dick a little too insistently for Sunghoon to do anything except open his mouth and take it. Halfway in, and then he stops just short of actually fucking his throat. Sunghoon takes a few breaths before lowering his tongue, and Jay takes that as his signal to push in.
Maybe his dick brushes by Sunghoon’s uvula because he can feel his throat constrict as he tries to swallow and can’t, and then he can feel just how tight the muscles squeeze down around Jay, who curses and holds his head in place despite Sunghoon clawing lines into his thighs. Sunghoon gags once, panic building when he realises he can’t breathe or swallow all the spit in his mouth, and then he gags again, and Jay still won’t let go of his head.
“You can do it,” Jay says, slightly strained. Not that Sunghoon can tell with how much he’s resisting against the hold. He frantically taps Jay’s thigh, another gag forcing tears into his eyes. It’s hard to voice his displeasure but he tries his best, muffled as it is.
To Sunghoon's dismay, Jay only pulls out enough for Sunghoon to stop gagging, saliva filling the space previously occupied by his cock. He has half a mind to bite- not to maim, just to warn, except Jay might actually kick him. And Sunghoon can't anyway, as he finds himself gagging at the feeling of all his spit in his throat- and then Jay shoves his hips forward again like he were forcing Sunghoon to swallow, pushing down the back of his tongue once more.
With a firm hand shoved into Jay's stomach, Sunghoon gets himself away from Jay, taking in a stunted breath and then retching, body crumpling in on itself between Jay's legs as he tries to get in air. His mouth is unnervingly wet, saliva going down to his chin that he tries to wipe off with his hand.
“That wasn’t even long,” Jay chides.
“I don’t-” Sunghoon coughs weakly, tears running down his cheeks, managing to stutter out through his stifled crying, “I don’t wan- wanna do this.”
Jay seems unimpressed, bending forward so his body is leaned over his knees, face centimeters away from Sunghoon’s and staring him down. Sunghoon can’t find it in himself to look up, cowering under the strong gaze.
“You're giving up already? What happened to wanting to please me?” Jay grabs him by his cheeks, hand now covered in Sunghoon's tears and spit, and seeming to care none too much about it. "Hmm? Is my baby meant to be a pillow princess forever?"
"N-no-"
"But you can't do this?" Jay sighs and lets go of his face. "I'm trying to help, but you didn't wanna listen to me, and look at you now. Crying because you can't take it like a good slut is supposed to, right?"
Sunghoon almost whines out loud, the noise caught in his throat the same time he tries to breathe and forcing another set of wet coughs out of him.
“This is what we mean by seeing you on your back and Sunoo on his knees. What do I do with you now?” Jay asks simply. “Maybe I should give you to Jake. He lets you be messy and terrible at head because he loves you.”
“’m sorry, ‘m sorry," Sunghoon babbles. It's true, he wants to go and be coddled by Jake and be told he's doing good even when he's failing to suck him off properly. He wants Jake to fuck him- he wants Jay to push him down and fuck him proper, but if Jay won't then Jake most definitely will.
He wants, and still he finds himself pulling at the waistband of Jay's pants, desperate to have another chance. Sunghoon doesn't want to do this- if Jay isn't feeling good. His eyes are focused on Jay’s cock, still slightly hard on his thigh and soaked in his spit, and looking at it is enough to get him gagging again around nothing.
“Are you? ‘Cause you’re still going even when I’m not inside your mouth.”
“You’re supposed to be helping,” Sunghoon argues, finally looking up at Jay with pitiful eyes.
“If I’m not mean to you, then you don’t get it. Look at how nice Jake and Sunoo are to you, and you've never learned how to suck dick."
“I didn’t want to! Jake and Sunoo love me so they don’t care.”
“I’m doing this because I love you."
"Not letting me breathe because you love me," Sunghoon mutters, slumping against Jay's legs. He wipes away most of his tears, cringing at how wet his face still is and how scratchy his throat feels when he swallows. "If you loved me, you wouldn't be trying to fuck my throat."
"Door in the face, or whatever it is, right?" Jay says. He sighs, tipping his head to try and get in Sunghoon's line of vision once more. “Will you listen to me?”
Sunghoon fights the urge to scowl at him, to just get up and leave despite how messy he's gotten because Jay is being rude, except Sunghoon has always wanted- needed- direction and guidance, and he knows he's only fighting back because he’s failing, and he’s frustrated. Jay seems to know as much too, reaching out to run his fingers through Sunghoon’s hair, pushing away the strands that stick to his forehead. He doesn’t press the question again, waiting for Sunghoon to respond patiently.
Finally, Sunghoon relaxes some of the tension in his shoulders, squishing his cheek into Jay's knee, and Jay knows.
"Come here," Jay says. Through his blurry vision, Sunghoon leans up closer to Jay, eagerly chasing the comfort of kisses. Jay cups Sunghoon’s wet cheek, letting him messily mouth his kisses on Jay’s lips. Without thinking, Sunghoon presses closer, until he nearly crawls his way up into Jay’s lap, his hand coming to cover the one on his face.
"I'm sorry," Sunghoon mumbles between his kisses. "I'm g- I'll be good."
“I know you will." Jay kisses him gently, no biting teeth or bullying his way into Sunghoon’s mouth.
When Sunghoon calms down enough, Jay pulls back, keeping his hand on Sunghoon's neck, and Sunghoon knows. So he lets himself be guided down again, laying a gentle kiss on the tip of Jay's dick when he gets close enough. He doesn't take him into his mouth yet, instead keeping his lips pressed onto heated skin until he can regulate his breathing. Jay's thumb strokes the nape of his neck gently, coaxing.
"Through your nose," Jay says, pushing Sunghoon's head down.
Inhale, exhale, inhale. The tip of Jay's dick slides against his hard palate, and then his soft palate, and he's fighting the need to gag as he tries to swallow around it pushing against the back of his tongue. Sunghoon succeeds- but only for as long as Jay is out of his throat.
His nose barely brushes against Jay's stomach, and then Sunghoon is hyper aware of his raspy breathing from Jay's cock taking up all the space around his airways. He tries swallowing, and then he gags. In an attempt to stop, Sunghoon clenches his fists atop Jay's thighs to try distracting himself, nails biting crescent marks into his palms.
“Fuck, Sunghoon, c’mon.”
He wants to tell Jay he’s trying, but his mouth is full and Jay certainly won’t let him move. For a second, Jay pulls his head up only enough to get his tip away from his esophagus, and Sunghoon uses that opportunity to swallow the spit that’s been pooling in his mouth. Of course he can’t do it all, and some still leaks past his lips and drips down his chin, and his contracting throat has Jay groaning and keeping a hold on him to stop his dick from being forced out.
Without asking, he pushes Sunghoon down again, and he gags again, and Sunghoon wants to start crying. Why is his body being so uncooperative? He thinks about how nice it would be to just swallow Jay down, push him into a broadcast bathroom and suck him off. Thinks about warming Heeseung in his mouth when he plays League at night. Thinks about being able to blow Sunoo when he eats him out. It makes Sunghoon squirm, spreading his legs wider to alleviate the pressure building at the zipper of his pants.
Maybe it’s that little bit of motivation, the idea of pleasing his members, that lets him relax slightly, and breathing through his nose gets that little bit easier. The panic that was flooding him before eases. He wants to be used, he needs it. His members are always so good to him, can't he do the same back?
Sunghoon feels like his jaw will dislocate from how full his mouth is, and how he tries to drop his jaw slightly so he can breathe, tongue glued to his mandible so he can open his airway and pant like a fucking dog around Jay's cock in his mouth. All his saliva and Jay's precum drips from the back of his teeth, and onto his clothes.
Right as he thinks he's gotten used to the feeling, Jay moves Sunghoon's head off, the heavy weight of his dick dragging up the back of his tongue. The few inches no longer in his mouth glisten with spit under the light of the room, the skin underneath a deep red. Something in the back of Sunghoon's head tells him be good, in a voice that sounds a lot like Jay's, and he shakily brings one hand to the base of Jay's dick, tightening his pointer and thumb in a ring just like how he was told to.
He glances up at Jay, who watches him carefully, before focusing back on his task, dragging his hand up to meet his mouth and then down again, trying his best to sink his head at the same speed. Not that his brain is clear enough to coordinate this movement, but he can feel Jay pushing back into his throat, and his lips kissing the ring of his fingers, and Jay lets out such a nice moan and Sunghoon feels himself shiver knowing it was him who did that.
So he moves his head off again, only able to move his hand up to meet it a beat after because he had to think about it. But his tongue wants to stay on the roof of his mouth, meaning Sunghoon unintentionally licks over the slit of Jay's cock, and Jay's hips buck forward, nearly gagging Sunghoon.
"Shit, sorry," Jay groans, trying to push Sunghoon's head down. Sunghoon's body wants to run, shoulders starting to pull back as his knees press into the hard floor. "Shh, don't, you're doing so fucking good."
Hearing those words makes Sunghoon give up near immediately, losing strength in his knees and his neck and letting Jay guide him where he wants him to go. All Jay does is push him deeper, like fucking into a too-small toy; only pulling off enough to rut forward again and feel the tip of his dick nudging into Sunghoon’s soft palate.
He times his exhales with Jay pulling out, moving his hand every once in a while when he remembers to, and Sunghoon thinks he’s finally gotten a rhythm down. His head is starting to go fuzzy, drool slipping out of his mouth and down Jay’s length like cum does. Jay chokes out a curse when Sunghoon accidentally grazes his teeth on heated flesh when he tries to swallow at the wrong time, tongue blocking Jay from thrusting down his throat.
"Fuck, 'm gonna come," Jay hisses. The weight of his hand on the back of his head is gone, giving Sunghoon the freedom to back off, and he doesn't. He stays with Jay's dick shoved so deep into his throat he can't make noise, both because he wants to, and because his body isn’t protesting now like it was before so he has to keep going.
Which he does- successfully, because Jay comes and Sunghoon is reflexively swallowing, muscles on autopilot as he watches Jay tip his head back and moan loudly into the room. When Sunghoon stops his swallowing to breathe, the cum pools into his mouth, squishing into the vestibule of his cheeks and under his tongue.
Sunghoon pulls off with a grimace, the sensation of Jay’s cock being dragged out of his throat making him gag and spit up whatever cum he was trying to swallow, landing on Jay’s hips and dripping off his skin onto the floor with a quiet splat. He doesn't have the will to be embarrassed, his lightheadedness from being face-fucked keeping his thoughts to I want Jay to fuck me, I want him to ruin me, I want him inside me.
Jay bends down, kissing Sunghoon deeply, pushing his tongue into his mouth to lick up the remnants of his own cum. It makes Sunghoon wanton, a shiver running up his spine with desire that he can barely voice around Jay’s insistent mouth.
"You did so fucking good, baby," Jay mumbles.
"Wanna come," Sunghoon gasps in return between their kisses. "Please, fuck me-"
"You'll come before I get in you," Jay says, sliding off the bed and onto his knees in front of Sunghoon. He hits the floor with a dull thud, one leg in between Sunghoon's and the other pressing against the outside of his thigh. Strong hands grab his waist to pull him closer, and Sunghoon's aching knees protest the shift. Now, he's close enough that his hard dick can be rutted against Jay's thigh, which he takes full advantage of.
All Jay does is grab the top of Sunghoon's thigh to yank him closer, but his thumb is pushed into the inside hollow of his leg- just a little too close to his dick, and Sunghoon comes in his pants. The moan that rips out of him is so loud, it hurts his throat deeper than the reach of Jay's cock. He ruts down, grinding his hips in circles, using Jay's leg to ride out his orgasm.
Everything is a mess, covered in spit and cum- his face, his clothes, Jay’s clothes, the floor. God, Jay's floor. He can feel Jay panting into the side of his neck, warm breaths on his already flushed skin making the room feel stuffy, but Sunghoon doesn’t mind. Jay turns his head and presses a kiss there, continuing in a line along his jaw until he reaches Sunghoon’s mouth.
“Can’t believe you came from just sucking me off.” Jay says, holding Sunghoon’s head upright as he kisses him deeper. “Go wash up. I’ll make you something for your throat. Hmm?”
Sunghoon doesn’t react at first, and Jay doesn’t either until Sunghoon finally does- a gentle nod signalling that he’s regained the strength to move.
Jay helps him off his knees, his flaccid cock with cum still drooling out the end that Sunghoon can’t take his eyes off of until he pulls back up his pants so he can lead Sunghoon out of his room. He thinks about taking Jay in his mouth again the entire time he’s in the bath.
Sunghoon is busy minding his own business- as he always is when he’s being bothered- when Heeseung slides up behind his chair and tips his head back, kissing him firmly on the mouth. One of his hands comes up around Sunghoon's neck, holding; the warmth of his palm bleeding into skin. The spoon in his hand clinks against the cup of tea Jay carefully prepared for him to soothe his throat.
“You were so damn loud,” Heeseung says quietly, pulling away to leave only enough space to whisper it against his lips. “Come show us what you learned.”
Sunghoon stretches up and kisses him back.