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Crown Over Heart

Summary:

The soft sand under their bodies blanketed them in a comfortable warmth. Seonghwa turned his head, watching as the sunset caught Hongjoong’s features and lightly dusting the tufts of hair that crossed his forehead, making the strands of brown glow. He looked so beautiful in this light. The sunset was the perfect shade of golden orange, making Hongjoong’s features glow beautifully. Seonghwa’s eyes trailed over every feature of Hongjoong’s face. His perfect jawline, his high yet delicate cheekbones, his perfectly pointed nose and the corners of his lips that naturally curled upwards into that precious smile. He was truly beautiful.

“I like the sky.” Hongjoong said softly after a long but comfortable silence.

“Me too.” Seonghwa replied. Hongjoong turned his head to meet Seonghwa’s gaze, his smile growing slightly. “And I see the sky in your eyes.”

 

Prince Hongjoong craves so much more out of life than to be trapped behind a cage that masked itself as luxurious walls. He craved joy. He craved the mundane, but most of all, he craved the ocean and the freedom it stood for.

Notes:

I had uploaded this once before then took it down cause i wanted to work on it more. I got the motivation recently so here we go~

Chapter Text

                                                       

 

The night was crisp and the air was filled with the salty smell of the sea and it seemed especially strong tonight. Hongjoong let out a slow, pleased sigh as he stretched, taking in the fluttering feeling inside him. Being surrounded by the waters like this always felt so freeing and natural. That in of itself isn't saying much when he spent just about all day every day trapped behind castle walls and guards following his every move. He enjoyed moments like this where he was able to slip away for even a moment and always mourning the time it would end and he’d be trapped back inside for who knew how long before he got another chance to slip away. Hongjoong looked out towards the horizon, the sea blending with a stormy sky in the distance. He figured he had some time before the storm got closer and he glanced over to the old pier that jetted out a good distance over the water and wanted to sit out on the edge for a bit.

 

As he sat there, his mind wandered in several different directions as he tried to distract himself from all of the little things in his life that usually overtook most of his thoughts. He didn't particularly enjoy his princely duties even if he did abide by them the majority of the time. He felt bad holding a grudge over his family and he knew it was a childish way to think, even if he thought that way often. He never asked to be in this role yet here he was, stuck in these overly glamorous corridors that seemed to stretch on for miles. Here he was, stuck playing the role of a prince who needed to care about this country with the goal of ruling it someday. But instead, here he was on the docks, wondering how much his father would scold him if he knew he had been out here alone. Hongjoong had always loved the sea but for as long as he can remember, he always knew that his father would try his damndest to keep him away from it but there never seemed to be any clear reason why.

 

Hongjoong’s peace was short lived and he snapped back into his surroundings when it suddenly started pouring, followed by a loud boom of thunder and he jumped, scrambling to his feet. The waves started crashing aggressively against the shore and he hurried back across the pier. As he got about halfway down the pier, he glanced to the side, his eyes widened at the sudden massive wave crashing up over him. He reached out to the railing to stabilize himself, his fingers just barely missing as the wave knocked him over the edge into the deep water. The impact into the water knocked the wind out of him, not giving him enough time to get a good breath in before falling in. He sank quickly, the panic over the lack of air making it significantly harder to surface himself. Wave after wave crashed, keeping him just out of reach of the surface until he couldn't hold his breath any longer and his vision tunneled before going entirely black. The freezing water took over his limbs and he could barely tell by the pressure surrounding him that he was sinking lower and lower until his consciousness faded entirely. 




A muffled sound found its way to Hongjoong’s senses and his hand twitched, feeling something warm and grainy under him. Sand? He tried hard to will himself to move, feeling returning to his hands before anything else. He opened his eyes, unable to push himself up just yet and winced at the bright light that burned his eyes and then he heard yelling voices. Were they getting closer? He tried to force himself upright but his whole body felt like jelly and he fell on his chest, knocking himself breathless, retching but throwing up nothing. The voices got louder and he looked up, his vision still blurred, seeing a few lightly armored figures running towards him and he recognized it to be guards.  

 

“Your Highness!” One of them called out. 

 

Hongjoong looked around his surroundings, the first thing he noticed was that the hot sun was beaming down on him; a whole night had passed. “What happened..” He mumbled. His guard approached him, frantically asking him various strings of questions and he tried to focus on them but Hongjoong caught a glimpse of a trail in the sand, ending where he was sitting. 

 

‘Did they pull me out?’ He wondered, but shook his head. That wouldn't make sense, they were nowhere near him when they spotted him, at least that's what he thought, but his head was spinning and he couldn't think straight. Hongjoong glanced at the hand reaching out to him and he took hold, pulling himself up and struggling to keep his balance. He brushed sand from his clothes, then noticed something flitter to the ground. He picked it up and turned it over in his hand. It was a silver scale with a blue tint to it, not much bigger than a coin. Hongjoong raised a brow then pocketed the scale when one of the guards leaned in to inspect what he held.

 

“I’m Fine.” Hongjoong muttered then turned to walk off back towards the palace. 

 

He stumbled and fell to his knees, groaning in pain and his guards helped him back up. Every bone in Hongjoong’s body ached like they had been crushed. His lungs were burning and just looking down at his hands, he could see the slight blue tint to his skin. He felt like shit but he just wanted to wash up and go lay down for a while but he begrudgingly let the guards escort him back. They continued to question him about what happened but he couldn't really remember anything. Hongjoong walked through the palace halls, noticing how other guards and the maids looked at him like they’d seen a ghost, and he knew it would only be a matter of time before his father seeked him out for answers. Unfortunately for the both of them, Hongjoong had no answers. He didn't have the slightest clue what happened to him. All he knew is that he should be dead and he wasn't.

 

Once Hongjoong finally convinced the guards that he was okay, he closed his bedroom door behind him and started to undress, sand still falling from the folds in his clothes. He tossed his clothes aside and stepped into the bathroom attached to his room and ran a warm bath. He was still pretty cold since waking up and figured he might get sick if he didn't do something to restore his body heat. Hongjoong braced himself on the edge of the sink as the tub filled, looking at his reflection. He looked rough, messy tangled hair that smelled like seaweed, red, irritated eyes, his skin was pale, discolored, and he had dark circles under his eyes. He really couldn't remember anything after falling in the water, but he knew someone had to have saved him. It would have been too convenient for him to have ended up on shore like he did. 

 

Hongjoong sighed and climbed in the tub, letting the hot water hug his skin and he let out a content sigh. He closed his eyes, drifting off a bit, brief images flashing across his closed eyes. Eyes underwater, bright sun rays piercing through the surface, illuminating a small area around him and staying just slightly out of reach. He hummed a soft tune to himself as he daydreamed. It wasn't a tune he could name, but one he swore he’d heard before. He suddenly thought there might be someone there with him, it felt like a comforting presence, but not one he recognized. He tried to focus on the presence, clinging to any little thing he could pick up but the memory eluded him. Hongjoong jolted upright, knocked out of his daze when he heard a rapid and heavy knocking on his door. He knew it was his father and he sighed, stepping out from the tub and quickly drying himself off before slipping on a robe. Hongjoong opened the door, seeing his father looking back at him with a face filled with concern.

 

“Hey dad.” Hongjoong mumbled. His dad pushed past him into the room and Hongjoong rolled his eyes, closing the door. “I’m fine if that's what you're wondering.”

 

“What were you doing out by the water by yourself?” His voice was stern but not angry. 

 

“Getting away from your hoard of goons for a moment of alone time.” Hongjoong muttered. “Is that such a crime?”

 

“When you go missing and proceed to nearly drown, yes it is!” 

 

Hongjoong held his wrists together out in front of him. “Throw me in a cell then.” he said with a snarky grin.

 

“This isn't funny Joong, you could have died. What would I have done then?” 

 

Hongjoong groaned “Don't start with that, I’m fine, accidents happen, okay?” 

 

“It’s bad enough I lost your mother, I can't lose you too.” Hongjoong didn't respond and instead sat on the edge of his bed, staring at the floor. “I’m assigning two personal escorts for you at all times. I won't risk you getting hurt again.”

 

“When are you going to stop treating me like this?” Hongjoong spat. “I’m not a kid anymore and I’m not going to let your guards play baby sitter.”

 

“I’m not arguing with you Joong. This is for your own good.”  Hongjoong watched as his father left, closing the door behind him. 

 

Hongjoong groaned into his hands, rubbing his face in frustration. He glanced down at the clothes he left on the ground and leaned over, picking up his pants, searching his pockets and pulling out the scale he found earlier. It was somewhat thick but light and the way the light shone on it made it shimmer and he wondered what kind of fish had scales like these. As he toyed with the scale, Hongjoong felt a tightness in his chest, uncomfortable, teetering on the edge of painful and he let out a slow breath. He stood and walked over to his window that overlooked part of the ocean and a sad smile caressed his lips. He wasn't about to let the guards stop him. He needed to go back to the pier. He couldn't quite explain it but there was a nagging feeling inside him, perhaps based on the mystery of how he survived but all he knew was that he wasn't going to let his father control him like this. He’s always loved the water, something he was told to have probably inherited from his mother. 

 

Hongjoong often wondered what she had been like. His father did not talk about her almost at all, other than saying that she died during childbirth. He had nothing to disprove that but Hongjoong did find it odd that there wasn't really anything of his mothers around the palace, like his father got rid of every trace of her. Hell, he didn't even know what she looked like. Maybe he really couldn't stand that she passed. Even if he didn't want to admit it, Hongjoong understood why his father acted the way he did. Hongjoong was the only heir to the throne and other than hopefully having love for his son, if Hongjoong died, who would rule once his father was gone? Hongjoong shook his head. His royal obligations were the last thing he wanted to think about. He was exhausted and wanted to sleep. He’d find a way back to the water if it killed him.

 

Hongjoong left his room, feeling like staying cooped up all day was just letting his father win. He had the entire palace to roam and he supposed that if he wanted to, he could go to the markets, (with an escort of course). Although he felt like shit still and venturing out that far didn't sound very appealing right now. Hongjoong wandered aimlessly for a while before finding himself out on the veranda overlooking the garden. He used to spend so much time out here when he was younger, getting lost in the hedge maze to pass away the dull days. Hongjoong walked down the gravel path, to a circular clearing with a large fountain in the middle and sat on the edge, dipping his hand in the cold shallow water. It rippled around his hands and he smirked down at the coins that had been scattered there. He knew several of them were from him as a child, wishing for a life at sea. He often wondered what the life of a pirate was like, or a sailor, even a fisherman. He thought it must be so freeing to be at the mercy of the waves, to be able to sail as far as your ship could take you. It was a life he longed for. One outside of these walls, one that might mean more to him than a life full of meaningless obligations full of politics and presenting yourself in an image that he didn't want anything to do with.

 

Hongjoong wondered what advice his mother would give him if she had been here. Would she be on his side? Would she understand his love for the ocean? Or would she be just as cruel as his father..? Hongjoong felt tears burn his eyes as he looked around himself. The tall white walls surrounding him would be so glamorous to a normal person but to him, he was just a pretty bird trapped in a pretty cage, his life at the mercy of others. He splashed the water and pulled his knees to his chest, letting out a shaking breath. He closed his eyes and tried to calm himself, noticing the sound of seagulls flying over him and he glanced up at them, smiling.

 

“What I would give to be you.” He mumbled with a sad smile.

 

“Your highness.” A voice called out.

 

Hongjoong looked over his shoulder, seeing a guard walking up to him and for a moment he was annoyed until he realized it was Yunho, a guard who had been working at the palace for a few years. They had developed a close friendship over the time Yunho had been there and Hongjoong was always pleased to see him.

 

“Is everything alright?” Hongjoong asked. 

 

Yunho smiled at him as he stepped closer. “Yes, everything is just fine. The King was actually just talking to me.”

 

Hongjoong’s smile fell and he looked Yunho up and down. “What did his Royal Majesty want?” He asked, feigning respect with a snarky grin.

 

“He appointed me to be your personal guard.”

 

Hongjoong scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Of course he did. At least he picked you.”

 

Yunho sat next to Hongjoong with a frown. “Joong.. He told me what happened to you. Are you alright?”

 

Hongjoong pulled his knees away from his chest to face Yunho better. “I’m fine. Mostly.” Hongjoong could easily focus on the pain in his chest but didn't want to bother bringing it up. 

 

“How did you make it back to the shore?” Yunho asked.

 

Hongjoong could tell it was mostly a rhetorical question but replied anyway. “I couldn't tell you. It’s just as much a mystery to me as it is to everyone else. By all rights, I should be dead.” Hongjoong felt his stomach turn as he said the words aloud. He knew that to be true, but admitting it like that really put it into perspective for him.

 

 “You’re going to keep me away from the ocean, aren't you?” Hongjoong asked after a long silence. 

 

Yunho sighed. “You know I don't want to.” 

 

“I get it, it’s your job.” Hongjoong replied bitterly. He thought for a moment then stood. “Fuck it, I want to get out of this place for a bit. Accompany me to the markets?” Hongjoong asked.

 

Yunho stood and bowed. “It would be my pleasure, Your Highness.”

 

Hongjoong playfully rolled his eyes. For the most part, especially when they were alone, Yunho wasn't very proper with Hongjoong (per his request), but it always amused Hongjoong when he was.  

 

Hongjoong excitedly went between several shops throughout the afternoon, mostly window shopping but he did pick up a few accessories that he liked. The markets were always busy, especially in the summer when the weather was nice. There were vendors left and right, singing praises about their stock, children running around and playing in the streets and the smell of smoked meats and baked goods was everywhere. Hongjoong loved the markets. It gave him a glimpse into the lives of normal people and he often wondered what it would be like to have a job like this, working a stall and selling baked goods or fruits. It was such a mundane thing but it intrigued him endlessly. Hongjoong stopped at a stall that was selling various trinkets and Knick knacks, a necklace on display catching his eye. He stepped up to the table and examined it; a delicate silver chain with a dark red crystal bordered by onyx swirls that overlapped the red gem. 

 

“Anything I can- Oh! Your Highness!” The shopkeep exclaimed.

 

Hongjoong flashed a gentle smile and bowed his head in greeting. “This is a beautiful necklace.” 

 

“Thank you, your Highness, I made it myself.” 

 

Hongjoong’s eyes skimmed over the other delicate yet intricate pieces of jewelry, noticing that they all had similar styles. “You made all of these?” He asked, impressed. Hongjoong lifted the necklace. “I’d like to purchase this please.”

 

“Of course! Thank you, Your Highness!”

 

Hongjoong giggled, pleased to see the gleam of joy shine through the shop keeper's eyes. They prepared a small leather pouch and gently packed the necklace inside, handing it to him. “It’ll be 30 copper.” 

 

Hongjoong froze as he reached into his coin purse. “30 copper?” He asked, sounding a little too stunned. He pulled out a gold coin and handed it to them. 

 

“I can't accept this, Your Highness!” 

 

Hongjoong smirked. “It’s 50 coppers to a silver and this beautiful work is worth double that. Don't sell yourself short in the future, alright?” 

 

After a mountain of thanks, Hongjoong left the stand feeling pleased. He had so little use for money and he knew there were people struggling. The least he could do was support whoever he could. 

 

“You’re a kind soul.” Yunho said as they headed back to the palace. 

 

Hongjoong rolled his eyes, but his smile showed that he appreciated the compliment. “I couldn't pass up on something that pretty.” Hongjoong thought for a moment. “Next time we’re out, remind me to check that stall again. The Masquerade soon and I’d like a few new pieces to go with my outfit.”

 

“You almost seem excited about it.” Yunho replied. “I thought you dreaded the masquerade.” 

 

Hongjoong chuckled. It was true, he usually dreaded that stupid party for several reasons, but the biggest reason was it was just another annual event where he was forced to show face and be a pretty prince on his best behavior. “I’m hoping this year will be different. Maybe if I just make an appearance and play nice, he won't notice if I slip away.”

 

“Yes, tell the plan to the guard in charge of keeping you in line.” Yunho teased.

 

“You’re not going to cover for me?” Hongjoong pouted.

 

“Not if you still want me to have a job after the night is over.” 

 

“You’re no fun.” Hongjoong mumbled.

 

They returned to the palace around sundown and Hongjoong was immediately greeted by a maid who beckoned him to follow her to the dining hall for dinner. Hongjoong sighed and unwillingly followed behind and seated himself at the absurdly large table. The food was already set out in front of him and at the other end of the way too long table, sat his father. A heavy silence filled the air and as Hongjoong opened his mouth to say something, he was interrupted. 

 

“It was unwise of you to leave the palace.” The king muttered.

 

Hongjoong paused. It wasn't what he expected him to say. “What do you mean? I go to the markets all the time.” He defended.

 

“Not after nearly dying.” His father argued.

 

Hongjoong groaned and buried his face in his hands. “Can we please let this go? It’s not like I tried to go and die!”

 

“Then you should have stayed inside where it was safe and not out by the water with no guards there to protect you.”

 

Hongjoong had half a mind to just get up and leave. Talking to his father felt like arguing with a child. “When are you going to stop treating me like this!?” Hongjoong snapped. “I’m not a doll, I’m not going to break just cause someone looked at me. Just cause mom died doesnt mean I will.”

 

The king slammed his hand down on the table. “Do not speak of her!” He yelled.

 

Hongjoong jumped, eyes wide. He had never heard his father raise his voice like that. He watched as his father stood and crossed the room, headed towards the doors. 

 

“I’ve made my decision Hongjoong.” The king muttered, pausing to glance over his shoulder. “I will not lose you.” 

 

Hongjoong watched in silence as he left then slammed his fist down on the table, tears burning his eyes. Why was he so upset? It was just the ocean, surely he could live without it? He wanted to believe that but the water called to him ever since he was young. He only truly felt peace when he was out there, like he could pretend nothing else mattered. No one but him and the water existed and it was bliss. 

 

Hongjoong was quick to excuse himself to his room for the night. He was exhausted from the day, but he really just needed some time alone. He flopped down on his bed with a grunt and looked up at the tall ceiling. His eyes trailed over the detailed molding as the sound of the waves from outside his barely opened window reached his ears. It almost seemed like a cruel joke that his room happened to be so close to the shoreline. Hongjoong stood and walked over to his window, sitting on the bench and rested his arms along the edge of the windowsill and looked out onto the horizon. It seemed like it would stretch on forever and he quickly found himself getting lost in his fantasies about sailing the ocean, finally tasting freedom.