Work Text:
It’s always colder after December. Not because it’s still snowing at all but because things just feel empty. You would expect a change. A new year, no longer the same person she was before but it’s January now and everything is the same.
Same dumb job at some obscure burger-joint, same shitty coworkers and same house where the warmth is gone. Everything is the same. Nothing ever differs. Nothing ever changes. Nothing exciting ever happens.
Leopard print nails tap against the counter, bored tired eyes watching as Bradley wipes down the same table for the thirteenth time. It’s been like this for the past hour. No one’s come in yet, they can barely consider the place to be open and it’s like this guy can’t stay still.
The only thing she’s thankful for is the fact that Chris hasn’t shown up yet, but that also means Jess is still M.I.A. No ride for Cherry today, no text either. Not even a call. Tongue clicks in annoyance and she spins on her heels to tend to the rack of burgers nearby.
Looks like a few were forgotten. What’s new? Chris not doing his job, again. Something he’ll continue to do, she’s sure. He doesn’t even focus when he’s here, always messing with something or someone, namely Bradley. Her eyes flicker back to the boy, he’s moved now. Gone elsewhere, not wiping down that stupid table anymore. Thank fuck.
She’s dying for a cigarette break. A lunch break. Any kind of break. Reprieve from something, from anything. It hasn’t even been more than an hour and a half and the work day is already too much. She’s not cut out for the fast food industry, not cut out to stand here and wait for nobody to show up and order the shitty food here.
There’s only one person that even comes in this early to eat and it’s some old lady she can’t remember the name of right now. Tossing away the leftover burgers on the rack into a nearby trash-can, she sighs softly.
A million other things could be done right now. She could be doing her nails, she could be shopping, listening to music, watching MTV, getting her back blown out, ANYTHING other than what she’s doing right now.
Yet here she is. Heavy footsteps divert her attention, coming from the kitchen and making their way out here. It’s Benson. Those stupid steel-toe boots he wears. Loud as hell, even if he himself doesn’t actually make much noise. He’s a quiet guy mostly, until you piss him off, a-la Chris. Even then, doesn’t get any louder than a ‘stop’ here and a ‘what the fuck’ there.
He’s got a mop in hand, dragging along the mop bucket. It bumps into the leg of a table and a little bit of the water spills out. Just barely, she swears she can hear him damn everything to hell under his breath but that’s a lot of talking for even Benson. She snickers quietly, pretending like she didn’t notice it.
It’s not too long that he’s got half the floor pristine, but it doesn’t matter ‘cause the loud sound of Jess’ car pulling into the parking lot and the horrible song choice which she attributes to Chris, of course, fills the area. Cherry’s eyes roll and she hops out from behind the counter, making sure not to step on any of the wet floor before she walks over to the bathrooms.
Someone’s gotta clean the woman’s bathroom, cause she guesses that Bradley is cleaning the men’s and she doesn’t wanna hear the argument Chris’ll have with Benson over dirtying his floors.
Right on time, the doors burst open as she enters the bathrooms and the muffled shout of Chris’ voice rings out throughout the joint. Anything he says, she cannot hear now; rather, she forces herself to not register anything she can hear. Almost a solid thirty minutes later and the bathroom is as spotless as she can get it to be and she’s even more tired than before. Manual labor. Gross.
Exiting the bathroom and returning to the floor, she meets Jess’ eyes and the girl waves at her sheepishly. “Hey…. Sorry about this morning..” Jess walks over, a hand going to Cherry’s shoulder to squeeze it. “Chris kinda… Didn’t have a ride–” A sound of disgust escapes Cherry, her eyes narrowing. “Girl-code? Remember it? Remember chicks before dicks? Hm? Any of that ring a bell, Sica?” She shrugs the hand off her shoulder, walking past Jessica.
“Genuinely cannot believe you’d choose THAT over your best friend since um. I don’t know. First grade? Loyalty.. Does it not mean anything anymore?” It’s a bit dramatic, yes, but the frown on Jessica’s face isn’t unsightly.
Cherry’s lips crack up just a tinge but she remains as straight faced as she can while she gives Jessica a little bit of hell. “It’s so fucking cold outside. I had to walk! My skirt is not long enough for that shit, my pussy is frozen.”Then there’s a snort, from both of them. Jess gets the picture, there isn’t truly anger there, just whininess.
“I’m soooorryyyy.”She drags out, pouting at her. “Look… I’ll buy you that new make-up palette you wanted from Hot Topic, how about that?”Jess offers, eyebrows raising hopefully. “Mm… Fine. You’re forgiven… But I want eyeliner too. You lost my other pencil and now I’m fucked.”
Their moment is promptly ruined by the man of the hour himself. “There you are, Cheryl!” A shudder ripples through her entire body like a shock of electricity. Not in a good way. “Don’t fucking call me that, dipshit.” Cherry’s eyes narrow as she spins to look at him, his hands going up in faux surrender. “Calm your tits, Jesus. You on your period or something?” Chris grimaces, raising a brow. “Kill yourself.” She spits through gritting teeth.
“Jess, collar your dog.” A glance towards the girl who’s taken her stance near him, looking between them with worried eyes. “Uh.. Chris.. C’mon.” She leads him away, giving Cherry an apologetic smile. Unbelievable.
The door to Hardy’s office swings open and he calls for them to gather, Cherry’s anger doesn’t subside at all. She wants to bash Chris’ fucking skull in, but she won’t. Just stands awkwardly near the doorway. Benson’s in a corner, Bradley a little bit away from her and Jess and Chris huddle together murmuring and giggling like freaks. It’s gross. Not Jess, but him.
Hardy says something about their sales being low, something about how they need to step up their game and make sure people are actually getting what they want so they’ll come back but it’s nothing that really matters to her.
She glances away from Jessica when their eyes meet, Jess’ lips turning from her half grin to a frown briefly. It doesn’t matter, none of it does. Their friendship obviously means nothing too. Hardy lectures Chris like he always does and the mood sours even more, a repetitive cycle that never ceases to amaze her. How things continue to happen like fucking Groundhog Day.
She’s out of his office as soon as he stops talking, not wanting to be in it a minute more than she has to. Hardy is a creep, a weirdo, or whatever Radiohead said. Not in a good way. She’s pretty sure she’s heard him jackin’ it after calling Bradley to his office and kicking him out but she’d never tell a soul about it because how the fuck do you even bring that up? Hey, Bradley, our boss totally gets off to talking to you and watching you squirm like the little worm you are! Yeah. No.
Maybe it was ‘cause it was morning that no one was really coming in. That changes pretty quickly once lunch rolls around because an influx of annoyed and starving people burst through the doors, tracking all types of mud and gunk onto the pretty much spotless floor Benson had mopped. Cherry’s eyes scan around to get a look at him as he exits Hardy’s office right behind Bradley.
Oh. He’s so pissed. She can see it in the way his fists flex beside his body, his hat pulled low to cover his eyes. They’re dirtying up what he cleaned, she’d be pissed too. Chris stands at the register, taking their orders; horrendously, probably. Bradley goes to the kitchen to start on the orders and Cherry walks behind the counter to man the other register. A few more customers come in. Poor Benson.
People come and go, ordering, getting their shit, etc. Cherry finds it all exhausting. She finally gets her break five hours into her shift, storming out of the building to smoke a cigarette. She needs to find another job. Maybe start sucking dick for money, something else. Chris is too much to handle, sometimes she just wishes he’d drop dead. She doesn’t get paid enough to deal with this bullshit, neither do any of the others. That motherfucker is always up Bradley’s ass too, poor guy.
The air burns her nostrils. Too cold, no jacket. She shivers slightly, pulling her box of cigarettes out of her purse and taking one between her lips. She searches for a lighter before letting out a frustrated groan. She lent her only one to Jess. Lord knows she’s never getting that back. Fuck. She swivels to head back inside but bumps face first into a hard chest. “S-Shit. Sorry–” The cigarette in her mouth is bent now, not that it’s much of a worry on her mind because she’s face to face with an already very pissed looking Benson. He stares at her silently for a minute before he sighs, it’s almost like he’s checking to see if she’s hurt at all and her eyebrows furrow at the thought. No way, right? “Um- Sorry.. Do you have a lighter, by the way?”
There’s silence for a solid few minutes and she gets ready to just walk past him back inside but he huffs low, searching his back pocket for something before he holds it out. It’s metal, with a little rose design. It’s cute, for someone like him. “Thanks..” She takes it, stuffing the bent cigarette into her box and taking out another one that’s fine. She lights it promptly once it’s between her lips, handing the lighter back to him with the offer of a cigarette. “Want one?”
He doesn’t reply, just holds his hand out for one and she drops it gently onto the palm of his hand. It’s worn, a little dry, little cuts here and there. Don’t know how he’d even get those, but maybe they’re from splintering the wooden pole of the mop. Maybe it’s from the kitchen when he works with the knives. Who knows. But he brings the cigarette to his mouth and lights it quickly and Cherry no longer can see his open palm anymore, it’s gone, his fingers holding the cigarette in place.
She can’t take her eyes off of him as a whole, she’s never been this close to him. Never been able to observe him without the distraction of their work getting in between. He stands there, puffing out smoke. She does the same, occasionally looking away so it isn’t so stupidly noticeable.
Doesn’t matter, because he knows. She knows that he knows. He probably knows that she knows that he knows. God. Her cheeks turn red, whether it’s because of the wind picking up and hitting them or out of embarrassment is up to said God.
“Y’got a starin’ problem?” It’s the first thing he says to her. His voice is rough, a little hoarse. He hasn’t said a word the entire day, at least not to her. Not ever. She stands rigid at that, sheepishly looking at him. “No… Just… Uh.. No.” For once she’s at a loss of words, no snarky comeback or anything. Something about Benson throws her off of her game. If it were Chris she’d have snapped back easily, but Benson is a whole different party.
Nothing else is said after that, he just stares at her. Stares through her. She doesn’t back down from his stare though, her eyebrows furrowing. “..What about you? Huh?” The corners of his lips tug up the tiniest amount. You wouldn’t even really notice it if you weren’t aware of how stone-faced Benson could be. It’s a change. Something different. “You always pissy in the mornings?” Another question, two for two.
“No. You?” He snorts dryly, smoke blowing through his nostrils instead of his mouth. Her lips part, cigarette almost falling. She coughs. “Yeah.” That’s all he says, turning his attention to the sky as a bird flies overhead. It shits on Hardy’s car windshield.
They both stare in silence for a moment before she lets out a choked laugh, finally dropping the cigarette to the floor and stomping it out. No way she can smoke now, not when she’s wheezing out laughter.
Benson is quiet, eyes slowly glancing her way. She’s doubled over, clutching her side like it’s the funniest shit that’s ever happened since sliced bread. She isn’t sure how he keeps his composure, but she looks up from her hunched over position and her eyes soften.
There’s a half grin on his face. He’s not looking her way anymore; but it feels like he still is. This is a moment. A lot of change. Maybe coming into work today wasn’t the worst thing in the world. She decides to head in, as much as this was a new experience, she’s freezing her tits off and seeing Benson have any semblance of a smile isn’t enough to warm her up.
She hands him another cigarette before she returns and he looks at her. He looks confused. It’s cute, his eyes aren’t that harsh right now. “Think of it as another apology for bumping into you or whatever.” Is all she says, re-entering the shop without waiting for another word. She’s so fucking stupid.
Her hands go up to her cheeks, rubbing them with her ice-cold hands. She really needs a new jacket. Or a sweater. Fuck. “Sooo… What was that?” She flinches out of her thought, eyes rounding when they land on Jess who’s now mopping up the dirt and grime those customers dragged in.
“What was what?” Cherry gives her a quizzical look, arms crossing. “Oh just… That. With Benson. Outside? I saw you laughing your ass off.. What did he say? Is he funny? Did he hit on you?” Jess’ nosy barrage of questions is irritating sometimes, this is one of those times.
“No– God, no. He didn’t say shit, okay? We saw a bird poop on Hardy’s car windshield and I lost my shit, okay? Not everyone is a sleaze like Chris. Benson definitely isn’t the type to hit on someone, especially not me.” There’s a certain bubbling feeling in the pit of her stomach that’s unfamiliar. Something loud clatters to the floor and jolts the both of them, wide eyes peering over to where it came from.
Bradley’s swooped down to pick a bunch of trays up, he must’ve dropped them while he was walking. She grimaces, he looks sick. “You okay, Bradley?” She asks, ignoring the fingertips of Jess’ hand as she attempts to yank her back.
“Yeah.. M’fine..” He mumbles quietly, it’s short, not in an attitude type of way but in a polite way. He’s always like that. He doesn’t change. She wishes he would. Maybe Chris would lay off him if he grew a spine.
“Need help?” She offers, crouching down to help gather the trays with him. His hands are shaking, like he’s about to pass out or something and she frowns. “You sure you’re okay? Maybe you should take a break, you’ve been here since what… Six am? Go.” She ushers him out to take his break, not having any of his little protests. After the constant shooing, he does let up and go take his ten minute.
“What the hell was that about?” Jess asks, her task of mopping the floors abandoned in favor of helping stack the trays in Cherry’s hands. “Beats me, poor guy looked like he was gonna shit bricks. Your monster terrorizes him too much, you know that? I oughta beat Chris’ ass.” She huffs. “Where is that jack-ass anyways? Did he slip and die or something?” Jess sighs, shaking her head.
“No.. He’s– In the bathroom or something, I ‘dunno. I think Bradley just needs to toughen up a little. Chris doesn’t really mess with Benson that much cause Benson just glares at him…” There is a twinge of worry in her eyes though.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with him… I’m kinda tired of it, Cher… He’s.. Awful.” Tiredness breaks through her normal chipper tone, her shoulders deflating at the confession. “Yeah, you think?” She raises a hand to gently stroke Jess’ cheek with a small comforting smile.
“Why don’t you break up with him then? He’s gonna ruin your life, I swear. Just dump him, get it over with, find another guy… Or a girl….” Her smile doubles, cheeky as her eyebrows wiggle. “Gross– Stop.. I’m not-” Jess can’t hide the way her face turns pink though and Cherry notes that down.
Totally in the closet, huh? “But seriously, dump his ass, you do NOT need a guy like that bringing you down, Jess. You were never like this before.. Nosy, yeah, gossipy, yeah, but a mean bitch to random people? No.. That’s my job. C’mon.. Let him go. You’ve been with him for what- Like… Five months? You could do better. You could be DONE better.” Jess doesn’t say anything else after that, she just kinda stares down at the ground like she’s contemplating it.
Cherry doesnt push it anymore than that though and they settle into a silence. It continues for the rest of the day with the occasional remark from Chris after. She tries her best to ignore him, not wanting him to ruin her better mood. He tries to talk to Bradley but she shuts it down every time, the worriedness she feels for him still there even though he looks a considerable amount better than he did before he took his break.
The work day ends a few hours later and she’s finally free. Jess leaves with Chris, the whole talk they had this morning out the window when she speeds off listening to Maroon Five on blast. Cherry opens the door to step out, the anger that had built up and gone now coming back to haunt her. She wants to rip that man to shreds. Wants him dead. She grits her teeth, trying to ignore the prickling of the tears at the corners of her eyes. She’s so mad it’s gonna drive her crazy.
It’s stupid, he’s stupid. He changed everything for her, and now that’s the new normal. Five months ago she would’ve been giggling and laughing with Jess on the way to the mall but now she stands alone in the parking lot, nose twitching and her eyes watery. “Cunt… Cunt. Cunt!” She starts out quiet, under her breath and then her volume increases. Thank God that Hardy left early, so it’s just her out there. The door behind her swings open and she quickly wipes at her eyes. Her mascara is probably smudged and the tips of her nose and ears are red. “... Are you.. Okay?” She hears Bradley question her but she doesn’t register it at first, it’s like the anger makes everything slow.
“Uh.. Cherry…?”That brings her back and she blinks dumbly, looking at him. His hands are in his pockets, she can hear him messing with his keys because they jingle in them. “... No.” She says honestly. Her bottom lip quivers. She feels like her heart is breaking. It’s finally sinking in, after all this time. It’s not her and Jessica anymore. It’s Jessica and Chris and she’s an afterthought. All of her best friend’s time is consumed by a man-child that doesn’t deserve her and she’s forgotten like a toy that’s lost its value.
Soul crushing. “Oh.” He doesn’t look comfortable at all right now and it irritates her. “Yeah. I gotta go.” She stomps forward, pulling her arms into her button up work shirt in an attempt to cover herself somewhat. The tears pour out as she walks and she feels like she’s the one that’s been dumped. Cherry doesn’t cry often, not because she’s tough or weak. No, never that. She doesn’t cry often because who the fuck cares? She cries… And then what? Tears don’t change anything. Words don’t either, though.
Stagnate. She’s stuck in a loop, she thinks to herself as she stares up at the sky. The same old, ordinary, boring life that she’s had ever since she got this stupid job. Ever since she graduated highschool. Yeah, she can hit the club up in the next city over but that’s only if Jess’ll take her. Yeah she can hang out. But that’s only if it’s with Jess. She’s alone, she realizes. That’s the problem. She’s depended on Jess this entire time and Jess doesn’t need her anymore.
There’s a gurgle at the back of her throat, choked, helpless. She wants to cry, she wants to sob, she wants to throw a fit and stomp and yell and scream. It’s not fair! The ONE person that wasn’t supposed to leave her ever, has. And she’s all alone. And it’s cold. And she’s angry and upset and tired and she wishes that she didn’t exist because maybe if she didn’t it would hurt less. She isn’t even halfway home, not even halfway from Burgers Burgers Burgers itself. She’s just down the road.
Her arms slowly slink out from her shirt to hold the sides of her head as she crouches down, hiccuping. Things have changed. Not for the good, but for the worst. Her eyes shut tight and her mouth opens in a scream. Nothing comes out. She wants to disappear. It shouldn’t even hurt this bad. So what if they’re friends? So what if they’re best friends? So what if she’s the last option? So what if Jess only needs her when Chris isn’t up her ass? So what if they’ve been as close as sisters since she can remember? So what? So what!?
A beep interrupts her pity party, startles the fuck out of her and she really does scream as she turns to look with wide terrified eyes. Her heart beats out of her chest, hands going to clutch her shirt. It’s Benson’s car; the window rolls down and he sticks his head out with a raised eyebrow. “The fuck are you doin’ out here?” She doesn’t even know how to begin to answer that. “It’s freezin’ and it’s gonna get colder… Don’t you ride with that other chick? Jess?” She nods slowly, biting down on her bottom lip to stop it from quivering. God she probably looks pathetic, tear streaked black lines on her cheeks and she’s shaking like a leaf. “... She ain’t wait for you?” This is the most he’s spoken to her, she thinks. Counting the conversation from before too.
“Why w-would she? She’s gotta drive Chris around like he’s some fucking precious poodle.”She huffs, the flare of jealousy apparent. He stares her down, deliberating something. A minute passes before he speaks up again, rolling his eyes. “Get in.” Her brain short circuits and she slowly stands, dumbly blinking.
“Get in before I fuckin’ change my mind.” He grumbles again, leaning over to unlock his passenger side door. She doesn’t need to be told three times, hurriedly walking to the otherside to get in. “Thanks…” She refuses to make eye contact even though she can feel him boring holes into the side of her face. “Yeah.” He doesn’t say anything else, doesn’t ask anything else. She pulls the seatbelt over herself and chews on her bottom lip. Tries not to think about the pain in her heart. Tries not to think about how her brain is mourning her friendship with Jessica like she’s dead when she isn’t. “Where do you live?” He breaks the silence, grip flexing on the wheel.
“Oh uh.. Y’know those really shitty apartments near the park? There..”She shrugs, scratching her cheek lightly. He nods and starts driving down the road, presumably heading in that direction. She watches the trees go by and the street lamps start to flicker on. “Why’d you uh… Decide to give me a ride?” She asks, glancing at him. He doesn’t answer right away, his focus locked in front of him but he does eventually. “Think of it as… A thank you for the extra cigarette.” Her lips form an ‘O’ shape as she nods. Makes sense.
The silence after that is comfortable, which is saying something because she hates silence. But she doesn’t think she can truly entertain a conversation right now and Benson isn’t the type to talk anyway. At least not to her. It doesn’t take him long to drop her off at the apartments and speed away like his car’s on fire. She doesn’t bother waving or even trying to thank him because he’s long gone by the time she’s stood on the sidewalk in front of where she lives.
She decides that she’s going to take a long hot shower and pray to God that she’s not sick. Maybe she’ll watch a horror movie and cry herself to sleep. What a fucking day.