Chapter Text
They pulled away, their breaths heavy, emotions spilling out. Erwin stepped back slightly, trying to make sense of whatever the hell had just happened. His brows furrowed subtly, indicating that his little gears were turning. He avoided looking at Levi entirely. “Okay,” he said to himself. “Don’t panic. Say something, talk about it.”
Levi’s eyes narrowed slightly as he tried to read Erwin’s expression.
Erwin cleared his throat before he began to speak. “I feel like we both need an explanation,” he mumbled, his voice cracking slightly. “I’ll go first—” he was interrupted by Levi.
Levi simply said, “No, I don’t think we do,” his voice calm, almost as if his heart wasn’t pounding in his chest. “Unless… you like kissing people for no reason?”
Erwin locked his gaze with Levi’s, his cheeks flushing slightly. “Wh— What ? No, of course not—” He looked away for a moment, wiping beads of sweat from his forehead. “What does that even mean?”
Levi shrugged, trying to be as nonchalant as possible. “Okay, you said it yourself. I don’t either.” His gaze was fixed on Erwin, though a faint blush was creeping up his neck. “That means we both have a reason.”
Erwin started pacing around the room, flustered. “A reason...? ” He shook his head slightly, trying to pull himself together. “I—This—Okay.” He rubbed a hand over his face. “We need to sit down and have a proper discussion.”
Levi scoffed, not out of annoyance but confusion. “A discussion?” he asked, his confusion evident in his voice. “About what exactly? The fact that you kissed me back?”
Erwin paused, his gaze meeting Levi’s once more, brows furrowed. “Yes, Levi, about that. By the walls, please sit down.”
The men sank onto their mattresses, the air thick with unspoken words.
“What the hell does this mean?” Erwin began, fumbling over his words. “You—You’re not exactly someone I can just… brush off.”
Levi narrowed his eyes, his head tilting slightly. “Okay, what does that mean?” he asked back, his voice accusing, even though he was flustered.
Erwin took a deep breath, running his hands through his hair. “You said you care about me,” he mumbled, barely above a whisper. He avoided eye contact for a moment. “And I’m not much of a feeler, but…” He locked his gaze on Levi once more, his tone suddenly serious.
“I don’t think that kiss was… nothing,” his voice was low, almost as if he was admitting it to himself as much as to Levi. “I just—If I’m being honest, I don’t know what to do with that.”
Levi swallowed, his pulse racing as he met Erwin's gaze. He could feel the weight of the words they were avoiding, words they both seemed too proud or afraid to say. But Levi wasn’t going to back down.
“If it wasn't nothing,” he began, his voice steady but his hands unconsciously gripping the edge of his bedsheets, “then maybe we just don’t need to know what to do with it.”
Erwin’s brows furrowed slightly, frustration flickering over his face. “So what, we’re just going to leave it hanging?” he muttered, his tone accusing. “Pretend like there’s nothing here, Levi?”
Levi’s eyes narrowed, his lips pressing into a thin line. “You’re the one who wanted to talk about it,” he shot back, his voice tight, maybe even more accusing. “But if it’s going to mess with your plans, then forget it. Don’t drag me into your overthinking.”
Erwin sighed deeply, running his hands through his hair. “You’re making it sound so… simple, Levi,” he spat, his tone firm. “But this— we —aren’t simple. I don’t know about you, but I simply can't pretend.”
Levi’s brows furrowed as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Pretend about what? ” he asked, frustration evident in his voice. “Stop sugarcoating it and tell me, for fuck’s sake!”
A knot formed in Erwin’s throat as his gaze flickered to Levi. An uncomfortable silence hung between them. The distance between their mattresses felt both too wide and not wide enough. He took a deep breath, his gaze falling to his hands. “Pretend I don’t like you,” he finally admitted, his voice trembling.
Erwin’s words hung heavily in the air, and for a moment, Levi felt his heart hammering against his ribs, louder than any silence they had shared. Time seemed to stand still between the two men. The night, almost as if it had overheard their conversation, became still. The flickering light of the oil lamp was dimmer now, allowing the moonlight to seep in from the curtains.
Levi blinked, his breath catching as he processed Erwin’s words. Suddenly, everything started to make sense. Erwin’s genuine smiles, the rare moments of vulnerability he’d shown Levi, the mattress, the kiss…
Levi’s hand dropped from his face, fingers twitching as if unsure where to go. He swallowed, his gaze drifting to the faint moonlight spilling across the floor, illuminating the lines that divided them. Slowly, he looked back up, meeting Erwin's gaze with a softness he never thought possible.
“You’ve been… feeling like this all along?” he murmured, his voice steadier than he felt. “And you thought I wouldn’t notice?”
Erwin’s cheeks flushed a deeper shade, but his gaze remained steady, even if his voice trembled slightly. “I thought… maybe it was too obvious.” He paused, hesitating. “But I didn’t want to risk it. Not with you.”
Levi clenched his jaw, his frustration melting into something softer, almost tender. “Risk? You idiot, ” he said, shaking his head more to himself than to Erwin. “You think I’d let it go as far as kissing you if I didn’t…” He trailed off, his throat tightening as he tried to find the right words.
Erwin's eyes widened slightly, his usually controlled patience failing him. “Didn’t what?”
Levi’s mouth twitched, a wry, almost reluctant smile playing on his lips. “If I didn’t feel the same,” he admitted, his voice barely a whisper. “I told you I wouldn’t kiss someone for no reason.” He felt exposed, vulnerable in a way he rarely allowed himself to be, but his gaze stayed fixed on Erwin’s.
Erwin’s expression softened, his shoulders easing as if the weight between them had finally lifted. “Then…” he began, a soft smile shaping his lips. “Maybe we stop pretending,” he whispered, voice rough but warm.
Levi’s gaze flickered to Erwin’s hand resting on his lap. Slowly, he closed the distance, his own hand resting on Erwin’s. “Yeah,” he murmured, letting himself relax, releasing the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. “Maybe we do.”