Chapter Text
Dear Mama,
School is going well. I’m enjoying the classes, and it’s nice to see Harry and Mary Jane again. There is a new student, Ned, and he’s quickly becoming a friend, too. I hope maybe you’ll be well enough to come visit sometime; you’d love them all.
I think Dad’s had some sort of epiphany. I told you in my last letter that he took me to a ball game. I thought somebody had just gifted him tickets. But actually, I was talking to Jarvis, and he said Dad bought the tickets. It was supposed to be a sort of late birthday outing. He didn’t communicate that, but I guess I do appreciate it. He’s been spending more time with me, helping me with my schoolwork and letting me help more with his big projects in the workshop.
I don’t know exactly what’s going on. He hasn’t spoken to me about it. But he definitely wants to be more involved. He’s not sulking as much, either. …I’m not sure if he was actually angry about Mr. Bucky. I know he was upset that you didn’t tell him, but nobody can fault you for not wanting to talk to Dad, Mama. I think he didn’t know how to let go of you. I know you two were complicated, but he was still taking care of you in some small ways, and I don’t think he really knows how not to.
He’s sorry, too. I don’t know if he’s written to you or not, but he is sorry. Instincts aren’t a good excuse, but that’s his reason. He was protective and jealous all at once, and he’s not good at feelings. I don’t know if he ever will be. You probably know better than I do. (You may know better than him, even. He was drinking the night he said all this. He was maudlin, not angry, for once. I’m not sure what he remembers saying.)
I’m rambling now, Mama, I’m sorry. I’ve started a new project, and I feel a bit like an alchemist. I’ll bring it next summer so you can see – we’ll get to have a little more fun with the things we forage. I tucked a small schematic in here for Mr. Bucky to see. I’d like his notes, if he’s okay with sending them. I got Dad’s opinions already, but I want Mr. Bucky to see it, too. Maybe I’ll even wait until later and he and I can build it together at the cottage – with your permission, of course.
Your care package came this week! I was so glad to see those old field journals, Mama, I can’t believe you kept them. Maybe they were hiding on the bookshelf, but I haven’t seen them in ages. Next time, I want to work with you to create a big field journal, and I want to use these notes and make new ones. The culmination of our research. For now. I won’t use the real pages from these books, though, I’ll trace the illustrations and re-write the notes. They’ll be more legible that way, anyhow. Also, M.J. and Ms. Potts want your cookie recipe. I told M.J. for sure, but I wasn’t sure what to tell Ms. Potts. She’s around a lot, though, so I can’t avoid her forever.
Dad doesn’t drink around her, and she had flowers when she left last week.
I’m looking forward to summer break already. I am having fun with school, I promise. But it’s always hard right at the beginning, coming back from the cottage. I miss you, I love you, and I hope to hear from you soon. If nothing else, I’m working on getting a ticket for December to see you before Christmas. Or maybe after, for the New Year. Whichever works best. Let me know what you’re thinking.
Love,
Peter
Steve wiped his eyes with his handkerchief and then passed the letter and folded-up schematic to Bucky to read. “You have to start writing to him, yourself,” he sniffled. “I won’t be able to keep up if he tries to discuss your notes with you in the next letter.”
Bucky hid a smile in a kiss against the side of Steve’s head, keeping one arm wrapped around Steve’s shoulder as they rested together on the couch. He set the letter aside for one moment to hand Steve his cup of tea that had been waiting on the coffee table. Steve wiped his eyes again, and sipped at his tea as he waited for Bucky to finish reading and looking at Peter’s blueprint. But Bucky didn’t even unfold the blueprint yet, setting the papers aside.
“Do you want to talk about anything?” Bucky asked softly. But his voice was a bit tight.
“I can tell you want to talk about something,” Steve answered, and shifted his position so that he was facing Bucky more, not just leaning back against his side.
Bucky’s smile was a bit rueful, but he answered, “Ms. Potts. That’s… Pepper?”
Steve just nodded, trying not to react too strongly. “Yes. She… Tony never really cheated on me with her. We had decided to separate already, but I didn’t have a place to go yet. The sneaking was for Peter’s benefit, mostly, but it still felt… wrong.” Then, finally, Steve grimaced. “She was his secretary. Once I left she became his personal assistant. I guess it’s more, now.”
The hand on Steve’s shoulder squeezed gently, and Bucky rubbed his back. Steve leaned in to nuzzle against Bucky’s collarbone, scenting softly before sipping his tea.
“She might be better for him than I was, anyway,” Steve sighed, leaning to set his cup on the coffee table. “I don’t begrudge them that. Just like he probably doesn’t truly begrudge you and me.” Steve shrugged and shuffled to curl up more on Bucky’s lap, pleased as the Alpha’s arms wrapped around him. “It was just so long together, and instincts are hard to shake. But it’s okay. I’m here now.”
Steve tipped his head back to look up at Bucky, smiling softly, and he purred as Bucky’s head tipped forward so their lips met in a soft kiss.
“You’re with me, now,” Bucky hummed, one arm holding Steve steady as the other rubbed over his shoulders. “And I hope I’m better for you. You’re real good for me, Stevie.”
Steve smiled and leaned to pull Bucky into another soft kiss. “You’re better for me. An’ you’re good for my pup, Bucky.” He huffed. “It’s almost funny, you know.”
Bucky’s brow creased, “How so?”
“Well, my last Alpha was flirting with every young little Omega. But you waited just to pick out the oldest of the bunch.”
Shaking his head, Bucky hugged Steve closer. He nuzzled into Steve’s hair and left a kiss at the crown of his head. “That doesn’t matter to me, sweetheart. You know that. I love you .”
Steve cooed and cupped Bucky’s cheeks, “I know… I mean, I… It won’t always make sense to me. But I know.” Steve guided Bucky into another soft, slow kiss. “I believe you, sweetheart.”
They sat together on the couch a while longer, holding each other and trading soft kisses. Morning chores were done, and on Sundays, the hardware store was closed. They had nowhere to be except here, with each other.
Between kisses, Steve murmured, “I think… for supper… I want to… bake… a casserole. …Something easy. Let us relax more.”
Bucky grinned, sucking softly on Steve’s bottom lip as they kissed again. “Don’t worry about it, baby. I think I wanna take you out tonight. I’m sure you won’t wanna cook.” Before Steve could refuse, Bucky stood from the couch, lifting Steve in his arms. The Omega blushed and gasped, and then pouted as that made Bucky grin. “Because, with your permission, I’d like to take you upstairs and start making you mine .”
Steve stared at Bucky with wide eyes, mouth agape. The confidence in Bucky’s expression started to fade, and Steve immediately surged forward, throwing his arms tight around Bucky’s shoulders and pulling him into a deep kiss.
“I love your plan,” Steve gasped, once they finally had to break for air. “But let’s go now, have an early dinner…” He dragged Bucky into another kiss, blushing and grinning all at once. “And we’ll have more time later to let bites rest and… allow ourselves to get a bit messy.”
The awe in Bucky’s eyes was still strange to Steve, and maybe it would always be a little strange. But it felt really good , too. To have an Alpha that wanted him so completely, to take him to dinner and bond him before marriage… Steve would never understand it. But he’d be damned if he let Bucky go.
Bucky carried Steve towards the stairs, a purr rumbling up from his chest. “I’ll take you upstairs to get ready, then,” he murmured, nuzzling against Steve’s cheek. “You can wear that new dress we got you last weekend at the market. And, well, I’ve got a ring I’d like you to wear, if you don’t mind.”
Steve laughed, glee filling his chest as they ascended the stairs. “I don’t mind at all, Bucky Barnes. I’ll be happy to wear your ring.”
Bucky set Steve on his feet and gave him one more kiss before Steve scurried into the bedroom to get dressed. He did his makeup and gelled his hair into place, and even with the warning, he promptly ruined his own mascara when entered the hallway to find Bucky on one knee.