Chapter Text
The dreams lasted weeks. Every day becoming more real, more graphic, more violent. Causing Randal to become more paranoid around his brother, feeling like he was never safe around him, making him feel like even the regular Luther behaviors he did since forever were potentially predatory. Every arm grab, every hug, every pat on the back, every hand on the back of the neck or the shoulder, felt like an attack, something to run away from, something to fight back against. Randal couldn’t stand to be in the same room with Luther, even with other people around, everything in his body was repulsed by him. And repulsed by his own mind even being able to conjure such an image, for even being able to see his brother in that way. Repulsed by himself. For liking it. He’s never felt anything like this before. The thought never crossed his mind but ever since these nightmares began something in his brain changed. He wasn’t even sure if he was scared of being alone with Luther because he thought that Luther would do something to him or because he actually wanted Luther to do something, he was waiting for Luther to do something to him. And was afraid that as a result of the yearning he would end up doing something regrettable. One day after dinner, Randal was headed to his room, before he was stopped by non other than the big brother himself. The moment Luther grabbed his arm Randal could feel his throat tightening up.
“Randal I couldn’t help but notice that you are behaving in a very strange way lately. Has something happened that you’re not telling me about?” Luther asked, sounding concerned and maybe a little mad about his brothers seeming distrust of him.
“Whaaat are you talking about big brother why would I hide anything from you?” Randal replied, visibly shaking, desperately trying to free his arm, which was already going numb, from his brothers grip.
“Yes Randal, why would you?” Luther said impatiently.
Randal just looked up at him, eyes wide open, lower lip quivering slightly. He didn’t know what to tell him. He couldn’t tell him the truth. He couldn’t tell him what was happening in his dreams, he couldn’t tell him how those dreams were making him feel, he couldn’t even tell him how this current confrontation was making him feel, feeling like something was trying to dig its way out of his stomach, his heartbeat becoming faster and more intense as his brothers grip on his arm tightened, preventing blood from going to his hand making it feel cold and tingly. Randals vision went blurry as he was staring into his brothers empty eyes, trying to find something, any excuse, any appropriate thing to say. His eyes started watering.
“I.. I don’t know” Randal mumbled out and as he felt Luthers grip loosening up he bolted off to his room, leaving his brother standing hurt and confused in the empty hallway.
After that day Randal stopped coming out of his room, well as much as he could, he would still sneak off into the bathroom, doing his best to not get noticed by anyone. Sebastian would bring meals to his room but Randal would barely touch them, having lost most of his appetite out of stress. He would spend whole days just thinking about his brother and trying to distract himself enough to not think about his brother. What would Luther even say if Randal told him what was going on. How would he react. How was he supposed to react. How was he supposed to react to his only little brother, whomst he’s always been very proud of, having such thoughts about him. Seeing him in that way. Seeing him as a monster. Wanting him to be a monster. The thought that Luther might actually like the sound of Randals fantasies crossed his mind briefly, before immediately disregarding it. It was simply impossible. It was disgusting.
Randal didn’t know how to go on like this. He didn’t think he could ever recover from this, he could never go back to acting normal around Luther. He tried. He tried his best to make things go back to normal on countless occasions but it seemingly only made things worse. Not only in his dreams, but in his conscious mind too. The closer he got to Luther, the more it felt like. Like. Like something else. His relationship with his brother was unfixable at this point, at least until the dreams were still a problem. Or until he confessed how he felt to Luther. But that wasn’t going to happen. Randal has stopped sleeping. Spending the days and night distracting himself from how exhausted he was. At some point trying to read a little bit of a manga but his eyes wouldn’t focus on the text. He could feel his body decaying day by day. The loneliness was starting to get to him. Of course Sebastian still lived in his room but they didn’t want to talk to eachother. It was a silent mutual agreement to not even look at eachother. Randal didn’t even want to imagine how the rest of the house was affected by all of this. How the pets felt. How Luther felt. This whole thing. How it was making him feel, how it was making him act. It ruined everything. Randal ruined everything.
Randal has turned to slitting his skin nearly everyday as a form of entertainment, but even that didn’t feel pleasurable in his misery. It’s not fun to cut when you’re exhausted and in so much misery you feel like you could close your eyes and never open them again. It usually made Randal feel better when he cut, although the word better might not be appropriate in this context because Randal never cut when he was feeling bad, before this all started he doesn’t even remember if he has ever even felt bad, at least not as bad as now, so cutting used to be purely for fun. To make him feel good. Now it couldn’t even make him feel okay. He felt pathetic. Randal was running out of space on his skin trying over and over again to cheer himself up with the sharpness of his blade. At this point it has even stopped hurting. Randal couldn’t even make himself feel. It was truly pathetic.
One day, or night, Randal lost track of time, the countless sleepless nights finally caught up to him. He wanted to lay down for just a second, he doesn’t even know when he closed his eyes, but he did. As soon as his messy head hit the pillow he lost consciousness almost immediately. He was standing in the hallway of his own house once again. At first he was confused. He was just in his room, wasn’t he. He was in his coffin. So what is he doing here. As soon as the realization hit him he could feel the anger boiling up inside of his core. He was mad at himself. This was a stupid mistake to make. He banged his gloved fist against the wall before he began marching forward down the hallway. It was the day time. The hallway was well lit, the kitschy wallpaper staring him down, the pattern on the walls watching him. He wanted this to be over quick, he didn’t care anymore, he wanted to find Luther as fast as he could so he could wake up as fast as it was possible, he didn’t care he was going to get hurt anymore. He just wanted to go back to drowning in his own sorrow. He could see a figure approaching him from the end of the corridor. He balled up his fist, already feeling sick. He stopped stomping forwards as Luther approached him, before grabbing his arm.
“Randal I couldn’t help but notice that you are behaving in a very strange way lately. Has something happened that you’re not telling me about?” Luther asked, his voice sounding familiar yet distant.
It took Randal a second to realize that he was already asked this question before. In this hallway, by the real Luther. A week, maybe two weeks, maybe a month ago. He couldn’t remember. He felt guilty about not giving Luther a concrete answer that day. But now he was furious. Furious that the dream Luther was imitating his brother and their conversations in such a way.
“That’s none of your fucking business” Randal snarled, before trying to free his arm from Luthers grip, only causing it to tighten in the process, fingers digging into the hundreds of cuts hiding under the fabric of Randals uniform. Randal squeaked quietly in pain.
“Randal you shouldn’t be talking to me like that, that’s very rude, I simply asked you a question” Luther scolded him in a stern voice, his blank facial expression unchanged, it was always hard to tell if he was mad just from looking at his face.
“Why have you been avoiding me Randal?” He asked, sounding angry and sad, squeezing Randals arm harder making the boy grimace in pain.
“Because I fucking hate you. Let me go” Randal snapped, his words finally making Luther loosen his grip, Randal immediately taking his arm away and gently massaging the spot Luther was squeezing.
“Why would you say that?” Luther spoke quietly, a small quiver in his voice could be heard, making Randals heart ache, immediately regretting his words but not knowing if he could back down now.
Randal didn’t really even know what he meant by that. Were his words directed just at the dream Luther. They had to be. He didn’t really hate Luther. Not the real one at least. He mostly hated himself. Hated himself for being disgusting, for feeling like this about his brother, for not being able to do anything, for tearing the household apart with his behavior. He stood there for a second, staring into Luthers vacant eyes, trying to read his face. Usually it was quite difficult to read Luthers emotions but it really wasn’t that hard this time, the corners of his mouth dropping in almost a cartoonish manner, his nostrils flaring up. Randal could feel the walls closing in on him already. He already wanted to cry.
“Oh Randal.. you don’t mean that” the older brother spoke after a minute of silence, taking a step close towards Randal.
Maybe that was true but Randal didn’t really need someone telling him how he feels. He backed away slightly, his hands almost instinctively coming up to defend himself before anything even happens.
“You didn’t mean that Randal” Luther spoke again taking another step towards his younger brother, his voice sounding less soft now more demanding, somehow making his words sound like an order.
Randals heart dropped, taking a few steps back at a time before his back met the wall, looking up at his brother doppelganger in fear, already feeling the shiver going down his spine seeing the familiar face of his loving brother, who this time did not want whats best for him, who wanted to hurt him, wanted to use Randal for his own selfish needs without any regard for his feelings, who liked seeing Randal hurting. A shivering breath left Randals mouth as Luther closed the space between them, before placing his hand on top of his younger brothers head. Randal almost crumbling, folding in on himself from feeling his brothers touch.
“Say you didn’t mean it Randal” Luther muttered, his voice even more angry.
As soothing as Luthers voice usually was to Randal, right now it had the same effect on his as scratching on metal. The older brother was standing so close to him he could see his real eyes parted open, peering at him, their judgmental gaze drilling a hole in his skull. He could feel Luthers grip tightening on his hair, pulling upwards on his scalp every second he left him without an answer. His hand quickly shot up, grabbing his brothers wrist trying to get him to let go.
“Randal..” Luthers tone sounded more like a parent scolding their child more than anything, as he continued pulling on his little brohters hair, forcing him to face him.
“I’m sorry I’m sorry, you're right I didn’t mean it I’m sorry” Randal broke quickly, the words spilling out weakly out of his throat, letting out a sigh of relief as he felt his brothers fingers untangling from his hair.
“You didn’t… I know you didn’t Randal.. It’s okay, but tell me why are you so emotional lately?” Luther whispered, moving his hand to caress Randals cheek, making the boys face twitch.
“I don’t know Luther, you don’t have to touch me” Randal quickly changed topics, grabbing Luthers hand, trying not to melt under the pleasant sensation of his touch. Trying to not pay attention how much bigger Luthers hands were. How pleasantly cool his rings felt on Randals hot skin. Randal laughed breathlessly before scolding himself in his mind for finding any enjoyment in this situation.
“Why shouldn’t i? If you’re going through a hard time I want to provide comfort” The older brother muttered, hunching over, moving his face closer to Randals, now being on eye level with him.
“There’s no need for that my dear big brother, I promise I will be okay” Randal stammered out, turning his head slightly.
Randal glanced briefly at Luthers face, hoping naively, that this time it could’ve been different, even though it never was, but maybe this time It could have, maybe this time Luther could be reasoned with, maybe he could snap out of it, maybe the slightest variation in the dream could make Randal snap awake, back to his miserable reality, but it didn’t look like it. Luthers face didn’t look like Luther anymore. One of his real eyes was fully cracked open warping his false eye unnaturally, in a way that wasn’t completely unfamiliar but at the same time it felt completely wrong. Like Randals brain couldn’t fully generate the image. There was no point.
“Luther please, I’m tired I’m so tired I can’t do this anymore please” Randal begged breathlessly.
Before any more protest could leave Randals mouth, Luther moved in even closer closing the space between them, kissing his younger brother making him freeze up. Randals shut his eyes tightly and put his free hand between himself and his older brother, almost instinctively. He knew there was no point in trying to push him away but he didn’t want to completely go down without a fight. He whined quietly into Luthers mouth, the noise clearly amusing the older one enough for him to crack a smile which Randal could feel against his lips. As Luthers tongue entered Randals mouth, he moved his hand, taking Randals hand along with it and slid it under the younger ones shirt, fingers gliding around his soft milky pale skin making it twitch. Luthers long snake like tongue was incredibly mobile dancing all around the inside of Randals mouth so far back into it he was desperately trying not to gag, his eyes welling up with tears. While Luthers tongue was trying to force itself down Randals throat and his hand was exploring his torso and small perky breast, Randal froze up once again and his eyes shot open hearing what sounded like distant footsteps from the end of the hallway slowly coming closer. The thought of anybody in the house seeing him in this current situation immediately put an end to any rising excitement from getting pursued by this mockery of his brothers image, turning his stomach into what felt like a heavy rock trapped within his body. The footsteps kept getting closer until the person responsible for them emerged from the left side of the hallway. Nyon was walking, hunched over, faster than usual, his gaze glued to the floor, face slightly flushed and sweaty, making a couple of glances at the brothers as he walked by. Randals gaze begged the cat for help, staring at Nyon, tears forming and streaming down his face, briefly trying to reach a hand out to him before Luther grabbed it and pulled it back down. Nyon disappeared as quickly as he showed up at the other end of the hallway, passing him as if he didn’t want to interrupt. Like he knew he couldn’t. He didn’t have to power to interrupt any of this. Randal felt weak in the knees. Somebody saw him, somebody saw him in his repulsive state, somebody saw what Luther was doing and they did nothing except look down in shame and walk faster. Both of Luthers hands make their way up Randals shirt, before pinching his nipples between his middle and index fingers, making the younger boy whimper in discomfort. Luther pulled away, the sensation of his tongue leaving Randals mouth was reminiscent of the sensation of pulling out a long hair out of your throat but way worse. Way thicker, grosses, wetter.
“Randally… It’s okay… You can come to my room and end this… It could be so easy hm?” Luther whispered, while pulling on Randals nipples slightly making him hiss and budge his chest out to counter the pain.
What does that mean. Come to his room. Did he mean right now. Like in the dream. How would that make things any better. How would that end anything.
“Please stop I don’t know what you’re talking about just stop please I’m so tired please” Randals huffed, his voice breaking, trying to stop crying. He knew it wasn’t going to help him, certainly wouldn’t gain any sympathy from the soulless monster in front of him.
“Shhhh it’s okay you’re just not ready yet… It’s okay…” Luther smiles gently before moving in once again.
This time craning his neck even lower, latching his mouth onto the gentle skin on his younger brothers neck, just kissing and licking mostly, although a stray sharp tooth did snag on Randals skin a couple of times making him shake and whimper in fear. Randal squeezed his eyes tightly, almost like in anticipation of some sorts. Like his head was under a guillotine and he was waiting for death. A cold shiver has ran down his spine as he just realized this is the closest and most intimate he could possibly ever be with his brother. And it was all an illusion. It wasn’t real. It didn’t feel real. The nature of this situation was enough to render it completely unrealistic on principal. This would never happen. Luther would never take him, he would never know how Randal feels about him he would never reciprocate his feelings. No matter how intense and terrifying these dreams could be, the things happening in them was all that Randal has ever hoped for. He wished Luther could forcefully come into Randals space, confronting him with his own feelings, placing a metaphorical mirror in front of him forcing him to face the fact that Randal is in love with Luther and that Luther is okay with that and he wants Randal. Randal wanted to look into his brothers eyes and see his own reflected in them. As he felt his brothers tongue tracing lines from his jaw to the base of his neck he couldn’t help but let himself indulge. Pushing all the feelings of dread and violation that were hard coded into the dreams structure aside to let himself feel pleasure from this alternative reality where his brother wanted him as much as he did. A reality where his brother desired him, looked at him with predatory hunger and took what he wanted from him. Where Randals dream of being his brothers victim or his lover could be real even for a couple minutes. Randal brought his arms up to Luthers shoulders, squeezing the fabric of his shirt with his fingers, at the same time putting his head back slightly exposing more of his neck to his brother. Luther looked up at his younger brother, surprised with the sudden shift in attitude. Randal was now looking at him eyes half way closed like he was still too afraid to look at his brothers monstrous face.
“Just.. gentle, okay? I’m scared..” Randal whispered the last part almost inaudibly.
Luther didn’t reply, just smiled gently at his brothers words, silently agreeing to go easy on him before leaning down once again, his lips making contact with his little brothers neck, placing wet kisses on his skin. Randals face twisted into a frown, trying to stop the tears from flowing. The familiarity in all of this, their house, the hall, the wallpaper on the walls, the carpet underneath their feet, the fabric of Luthers shirt in between Randals fingers, yet it was hard for Randal to savor the moment. Knowing that no matter how real this all felt, it wasn’t. And it didn’t. It was all a poor imitation of reality. It was hard to enjoy something his brain specifically conjured to torment him. But he was still trying to. Trying to focus on the sensation of Luthers tongue teasing his neck, his hands moving from Randals tits to his back, rubbing it gently and hugging Randal in the process, his brothers knee moving it’s way in between his legs rubbing gently against his crotch making him whine even with three layers of fabric separating him from skin on skin contact. His was focusing so hard on trying to make all these sensations feel real, it felt like he was going to jump out of his skin when he once again heard footsteps coming closer from the end of the hallway. His eyes shot open and where met with the judgmental gaze of Nyen slowly walking up to them in the hall. Unlike Nyon he didn’t think like he wanted to avoid interrupting them at all. Randal could see the jealousy clearly in his face. His nose scrunched, eyebrows furrowed all the way, mouth twisted into a disgusted frown, his whole face twitching and moving like he was struggling to hold the expression, like he was trying not to show how distressed it made him to see his master paying more attention to a selfish brat tearing the house apart than him. He stared directly into Randals eyes as he passed them, his neck almost twisting backwards as he disappeared at the end of the hallway. He wasn’t mad at Luther, he didn’t hold anything against his master, ever. He was only mad at Randal. A somber reminded of how things would turn out if Randal actually confessed his feelings to Luther. The response surely would be nothing but disgust, discomfort, distress. And it would only be his fault. He sighed, his breath coming out shakey as his brothers knee moved slowly, steadily against his crotch. This wasn’t real, nothing was, there were no consequences for him enjoying himself for now since after he will get to wake up and everything in the real world will just come back to how it has been for the past few months. Miserable. As much as he wanted real Luther to love him, he knew that just wasn’t an option, he had to be satisfied with this Luther for now, for this was the only Luther that wasn’t scared to touch him.
“Big brother I love you…” Randal sobbed out weakly, wrapping his arms around Luthers neck, hiding his face in his brothers shirt, muffling his quiet cries and whimpers.
“I know Randal, I know, but you shouldn’t be telling me that” Luther said in a caring voice of a parent, explaining the concept of death to their child.
Randal knew what he meant, unfortunately, but it still stung. He knew he should save those words for real Luther. He didn’t want to. And words saved forever would simply go to waste. The older brother interrupted Randals train of though by leaning down and gently kissing his cheek.
“I promise I won’t be mad at you Randal, It will be alright” Luther spoke in a comforting tone, taking his hand from Randals back to brush the ginger hair out of his face.
“Are you sure? Please, you can’t hate me, I can’t make you hate me please..” Randal stared up at Luther, eyes all wide and wet, his words frantic and scattered before getting interrupted by his brother once again kissing his cheek.
“That’s right Randal, you can’t make me hate you” Luther replied, an unusually pleasant, gentle, human smile lighting up his face.
Randals breath hitched, he choked back a few quiet sobs, heaved, soaked the front of Luthers shirt in tears and snot, before he closed his eyes, ultimately comforted. He didn’t know if he was ready to confess to real Luther but he knew he had to let go off dream Luther. After moths of feeling trapped in his dreams and also in the real world, by him, at this point it felt more like Randal was desperately clinging onto dream Luther for a semblance of the attention he wanted to receive from his real big brother. He didn’t know if this was actually the end. As recently as a earlier that day he would’ve be begging god or something for it all to end, for dream Luther to let him go, for the nightmares to stop. But now he was scared. How could he continue living normally after this. He figured he would have to freestyle and figure it out on the go as he felt himself slip away from Luthers grip. Weightless. Before quickly crashing down back into his coffin. This time slowly opening his eye, getting up slowly. It was night. He could tell from Sebastian sleeping peacefully next to him in his jammies. Randal doesn’t remember laying under a blanket as he fell asleep, he smirked slightly imagining Sebastian doing that for him. He reached over to his pets coffin, grabbed him by the shoulder and gently and humanely shook him awake.
“Sebastian my dear pet I am leaving, I will not come back, I am going to kill myself, promise to take care of my dolls for me” Randal whispered.
“Wuh..? Sure?” Sebastian stared at him, eyes squinted, still dazed and confused after being gently and humanely woken up.
Randal nodded in approval, ruffled Sebastians curly hair before getting up from his coffin and with a confident stride leaving the room. It finally dawned on Randal, the dreams wouldn’t stop unless he took action. He had to do something. He had to fulfill one of his most primal needs or else he would never be able to let go. He had to fuck Luther. Maybe there was a chance for a semi normal life at least a new normal life, where he can have sex with Luther and also not be riddled with guilt and disgust. Maybe Luther will kick him out of the house and he will be cursed to walk the earth forever like Cain from the bible. But it didn’t matter right now. Randal wanted nothing more than to fuck his older brother and now he was mad. He couldn’t understand why he was holding himself back for so long. Usually whenever he wanted to do something at least a little bit, he just did it. No matter how small and or stupid or nonsensical the want was, he just went and did it anyway. Simply because he wanted to and he could. And he wanted to have sex with Luther, very much even. So much it made him sick. Technically when you look at it from a logical angle, there was nothing stopping him.
Randal walked calmly through the house, carefully placing every step not wanting to accidentally awake someone, completely ruining his plan. When he finally reached his destination, he carefully opened the door as quietly as he possibly could before stepping into Luthers room. He always thought Luther was a weirdo for making his cat men sleep in a separate room but now he was really grateful for it. Otherwise this would never be possible. Luther was sleeping peacefully in his bed, eye mask on his face, and his arms above the covers like a good christian boy. Randal slowly sneaked up to the bed, grabbed the covers and gently took them off his older brother. Luther was sleeping in his freaky nightgown as usual, he looked peaceful and cute kind off in an off putting way. Like a corpse surrounded by the satin lining of its casket, during a funeral. Randal was practically salivating, trying to keep his voice in, hide his desperation as he lifted Luthers gown up. He had pajama pants underneath. Of course. Randal sighed at the slight inconvenience before backing away slightly before dropping his own pants, leaving him in just boxers and the upper part of his usual uniform. Slowly and carefully he climbed onto the bed straddling Luther and positioning himself above his hips, the whole time trying not to let out an excited childish giggle. Randal slowly lowered himself placing his crotch on top of the spot in Luthers pajama pants that was bulging out slightly. A shakey breathy almost laugh like moan escaped Randals mouth, the feeling of his brothers dick against him, even when separated by two layers of clothing was already almost too much for him. This was way closer than he has ever thought he would be. Randal placed his hands on the bed either side of Luthers body, gripping the sheets with his fingers, trying to get some stability before he slowly, gently stared moving his hips. Back and forth, a little bit up and a little bit down, rubbing his pussy on his big brothers bulge. He was watching his older brothers face intensely, trying to gauge if he was just about to wake up or if everything was safe. If Luther woke up right now the first thing he would see after opening his freaky little eyes would be his brothers face wide eyed staring at him, grinning like a maniac. For now he still looked unconscious, his body and face unmoving, not a single sound leaving him, it felt a little bit like descecrating the dead, a thought that lingered in Randals mind for way too long and that made him too excited. Maybe it was just his excited imagination and all the adrenaline coursing through him but after a couple minutes of grinding on his brother he swears he could feel his cock hardening against his crotch. The realization made him see starts for a second, his mouth hanging open in brief disbelief. Luther loved him after all, maybe he was hiding something too, maybe he secretly wanted this, maybe he lusted after his little brother, maybe he was no better than Randal. He rose slightly off Luthers crotch and clasped his fingers around the waist band of his pajama pants. He paused. Hesitated. This was serious. There might be no coming back from this. If Luther wakes up to this he won’t believe any clever little explanations Randal might make up. There will be only one possible explanation. Randal would take a moment to think this through, to consider what else he could do, to think if this was worth it, if he was a regular rational human being. Randal was too far gone to care about his options or the consequences of his actions. He wanted this, he wanted his brothers dick and there was nothing in this world that would be able to stop him from getting it. He pulled first up away from Luthers body then down, releasing his half hard cock from the constraints of his silky pjs. Randal sat on his brother hips again, with his cock in front of him, comparing the size of it to the length of his torso, trying to gauge how far in him it would be if he put it in to the hilt. This was just like hentai. Randal was wide eyed staring at it for a second, never having thought he would ever get this far. Never thinking he would ever get to see it, even less touch it. He gently wrapped his fingers around it, slightly grossed out by the sensation. It was so bizarre. It felt like alive. Randal giggled. So gross. With him sitting like this with it in between his legs it kind off felt like it could be his own. Proportionally too big to be on his body but a guy can dream. Randal got too fascinated with Luthers cock he forgot what he was even there for to begin with. He rose slightly again, his breath coming out shaky as he clumsily took his boxers off, his pussy so wet from all of this nights attractions it was kind off uncomfortable sensorially to exist, but he didn’t really care right now. His hands trembled as he guided and aligned Luthers dick with his hole. Before he could put it in he had to reflect for a moment, reflect on the past months, get mad at himself that he didn’t do this earlier and save himself the worries, come to terms with that this was definitely going to wake Luther up and nothing Randal said could make this look innocent. The thought of ruining his own life surprisingly didn’t deter him from going through with it, even worse it might have made him even more excited. He pressed it against his pussy with his hand, rubbing his clit against the tip. His face was so hot it felt like he was going to pass out. He bit his lip and began slowly lowering himself, stabilizing the dick with his hand, tip pressing against his entrance as he realized. Shit. Fuck.
“It’s not going to fit..” He whispered to himself, trying not to laugh at how aroused that string of words made him.
He gritted his teeth and kept pushing. It hurt. He isn’t built for this but he’s determined. He winced in pain as he managed to push the tip in, the sensation making him feel light headed and nauseous. This is fucked up. This is the best decision he has ever made. He was in pain and his legs were shaking and he wasn’t even half way down his brother dick but he was happy. Finally felt like he took control. Finally felt like he wasn’t just a helpless victim of his own sickness. Finally felt the excitement of being alive again. Sudden movement snapped him out of his thoughts. He froze. He kind off forgot Luther was even there. He looked over and was met with Luthers face staring down at him in shock.
“Randal what in the living hell are you doing?” Luther shouted, scandalized, in the same tone a mother would after her kid broke a plate, as he pulled the sleeping mask off his face. He tried to reach out to push Randal off but his younger brother slapped his hand away. Before he could scold his little brother again he felt Randal lowering his hips further, trying to push more of his length inside, the sensation making him gasp.
“Randal stop it, this isn’t normal, get off me, young man you’re in big trouble, Randal this is enough” Luther sounded really mad, still a little dazed from being woken up but more mad than Randal has ever heard him, but he doesn’t care.
“Big brother I’m sorry I can’t stop, please just let me do this this is all I’ve ever wanted, please big brother” Randal said, before shutting his eyes tight and gritting his teeth trying to force through the pain. The feeling of his cock getting buried deeper in his brothers wet cunt making Luther gasp and firmly place his hand on Randals shoulder.
“Randal you can’t do this, you can’t do this now you can’t do this ever, first you avoid me for months and now you’re doing this, what the hell is wrong with you?” Luther asked rhetorically, fully knowing what was wrong with his brother.
Randal froze for a second, he knew Luther would be mad at him but he wasn’t fully prepared for it. He could feel a squeezing pain in his chest and throat. His vision going blurry from tears. He started sobbing quietly before wrapping his arms around Luther, trying desperately to embrace him, which is hard to do to someone who's completely disgusted by you.
“Luther, I’m sorry… I’m so sorry, but I don’t know what else I can do, please… I love you big brother please just let me… You make me so happy big brother, please… This is all I’ve ever wanted this was my only dream, please just let me do this please… I’m sorry but I love you…”
"Please..."