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English
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Published:
2024-07-10
Updated:
2024-08-30
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5,825
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3/?
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4
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104

War of the Blind

Chapter 3: Plans are Made

Summary:

In which Shinso elaborates on his mental state.
TW: Schizophrenia

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

I walk to school a few hours later, coffee thermos in my hand. I love the early hours of the morning when the world is quiet. I have so many options. I can go do homework in my currently empty classroom or the library, but I finished it all last night. I can practice my stalking skills on the bored, meandering students, unable to mask myself among the hoards that normally fill the halls. I can linger near people to learn drama, but I don’t think Mina’s here yet, so that would probably turn up empty. I turn a corner as I brainstorm, and my eyes catch on the track outside in the gym area. I spot Bakugo running on the track. I smile genuinely, a thing I don’t normally catch myself doing. I only wonder for a second why when I come to a conclusion: He has drive. I respect that. I had to work hard to get into 1-B. I definitely understand the pressure. He’s probably letting off steam, too, from the food thing. He started it. I remind myself. As he runs closer to the school, he glances up and sees me. Shoot. I slip out of view of the window before he can do a double-take.

I quickly stride away, keeping my expression neutral as I pass by two girls whispering to each other. I turn the nearest corner and force myself to think. Where will he not find me? The boy’s bathroom won’t work. And I don’t think the library can stop his explosive shouting. Where can I go that he can’t? I’m sure he can follow me anywhere in the school, when I spot Vlad King approaching me. Normally, I would stop to chat, but Bakugo could be right behind me. Unfortunately, my homeroom teacher didn’t quite catch on to my hastiness.

“Hey there, son. What are you doing here so early? Not up to trouble, I hope.” He smiles, but it’s more like a grimace.

I have to get this over with fast. “Nope, no trouble Kan. Just looking for one of my parents. Preferably my dad. Have you seen him?”

The taller man nods. “Yeah, he’s in the teacher’s lounge. Anything I can help with, Shinso?”

You can make him stall Bakugo.

I smirk. “If you can use my last name, I can use your first name, Sekijiro. I’m okay, though thanks for asking. See you in class.” I say, then walk past him, not giving him a chance to reply.

The teacher’s lounge. That’s literally the best option. Bakugo can’t go there. As I round the corner, I hear heavy footsteps behind me, followed by Vlad King calling out, “No running in the halls, son! I won’t hesitate to tell Aizawa about misbehavior!” I then hear a grunt, unmistakable Bakugo’s as I reach the door to the teacher’s lounge. I slip in as fast as I can, accidentally breaking my demeanor to run the last few steps. As soon as I’m in, I shut the door behind me and sink to the ground, my back against the door.

When I catch my breath, I look up to see the underground hero and homeroom teacher to class 1-A, Eraserhead staring at me. “Hey dad.” I say, trying to make my voice sound less breathless.

My father stared at me for a second before saying, “Anything I need to intercede in?” 

You can make him reprimand Bakugo.

I shake my head. “No. I’ve got it.” He nods and goes back to his paperwork. That’s one of the best things about him. He lets you deal with your own problems, offering his help but not forcing it. I stand up and walk over to Pops’ desk, way more cluttered than Dad’s. I grimace as I set my backpack down, my eyes drawn to the bright bobbels and color-coded papers. Everything about him has to be loud.

I glance over at my dad, remembering something I had meant to tell him. “Yo. Dad.” “Hmm.” He hummed in acknowledgment without looking up.

You can make him pay attention.

Shut up, he is paying attention. “I used your fingerprint scanner and computer yesterday.” I say, leaving out tons of details.

“Yeah, Midnight told me.” He says, looking up at me. Shoot. Midnight can’t keep her mouth shut. Sure enough, he says, “She also told me you’re starting something with Bakugo. Could that be who you were running from?”

You can make him drop it.

The answer is clear as we hear a gruff voice outside, banging on doors and yelling, “Open up Eyebags! I just want to talk!” “...It’s possible.” I reply.

My dad sighs. “I can not stress this enough. Being an extra to him is bad enough. You do not want him as an enemy.”

You can make him fine with it.

I groan. “I know, I know. It’s just. Fun. I don’t really get a lot of that. And if he starts getting physical, I can use my quirk on him. ‘Cuz that counts as self-defense, right?” I ask, knowing I’m right.

My dad stares at me, unamused. “Don’t be dumb.” Then he went back to his paperwork.

You can make him supportive.

Seriously, shut up. This is the best response I’m gonna get. I leave my bag where it is and head to the door. I take a collective breath before opening it and slipping into the hallway. Bakugo is banging on a door half the hallway down. I step into the shadow of a vending machine, and slowly melt out of it when he turns around.

I keep my expression neutral as he notices me. “Hah? Have you been hiding there this whole time?” He storms closer.

“Wouldn’t you like to know. I’m up for a simple, friendly discussion if you’re willing to calm down.” I say, getting right to the point.

The explosive teen glares at me and opens his mouth, no doubt about to yell something at me, even though I’m four feet away from him. I decide to intercede before he can. “And preferably lacking your death threats, because those can get tiring quick.” I stare almost bored at Bakugo, who’s looking at me incredulously. “You ruined my day. I had to throw that monstrosity out and wrote a note promising to replace the other guys’ stuff. You shouldn’t be dragging them into this.” He growls.

You can make him sorry .

 I smirk at him before saying, “Everything I did was completely called for. You started it by ruining my favorite, expensive coffee.” I lean forward. “And good job using your words. Good boy.” With that, I stalk to my classroom, leaving Bakugo behind me, frozen in shock.

 

A few feet from my classroom doorway, Kaminari interrupts my silent passage. He’s walking down the hallway, talking too loud for my comfort to Jiro. I quickly walk the last few steps and am one foot through the doorway when I hear that dreaded voice.

“Shinso! Bakugo’s pissed, man. He woke all of us up, screaming. It was only four, so nobody was too happy. The whole class hates you right now, which is hilarious.” He jokes, nudging me with his elbow.

I straighten up so that I loom over him before responding, “Don’t think I’ve forgotten your little role, Kaminari. You may just be a pawn, but you’re still in the game.” I walk into my classroom, leaving the electric kid staring at me, processing what I said. 

After a few minutes, my classmates come in, sitting down and talking. This might be my least favorite part of the day. Everyone talks to their friends, while I sit at my desk, pretending to do homework. Fun. On the bright side, I’m not approached, which is worse than the embarrassment of being alone. Five minutes before class starts, Vlad King walks in and is bombarded with kids who have questions on homework or slips they need him to sign.

 I close my books. I wasn’t really reading them anyway, I was trying to eavesdrop. Apparently Midoriya was hosting a party in 1-A’s common room tomorrow night for the two hero courses, to get to know each other. That’s fine. I’ll just stay in my dorm, finding more ways to fill my boredom, like I always do. I have to stop thinking about this, or else I’ll start wishing I was invited.

Luckily, our teacher stands behind his desk and the bell rings, signaling the start of the school day. I kind of listen, but really, I’m planning on how to get Bakugo again. He’s fast, he’ll strike back quick. I need to be prepared. I’m writing down ideas in my notebook during a break when a voice startles me out of my thoughts. “Can I help?”

To the untrained eye, I was expecting this and had absolutely no reaction. But in reality I think my heart skipped a beat. After I finally registered what she said, I figured I could use the help. “Sure. But anything that happens to you is not on me. I claim no liabilities.” Kendo smiles. “I know how unstable Bakugo is. That’s why I want to join. It’s going to be fun. You have yourself a deal.” 

You can make her take it back.

Normally, I work best alone. However, this could work. Kendo is strong and reliable. This could be good. I turn to her. “We should talk it over. Does tonight work?” She nods. “Sounds perfect. I think the teachers will throw a fit if you go into a girl’s dorm. So…yours?”

You can make her let you into her room.

Ew, what? “Sure. Does two work for you?” Kendo’s eyebrows jump up. “Um… I try to be asleep by then.” 

You can make her stay up.

“Right… But I don’t usually finish my homework ‘till at least one thirty.” Kendo scrunches her nose. “Why not do it right after school? That’s when everyone else does it. You know, normal human beings.” She teases. 

You can make her understand.

Wow, quirk, you said that yesterday too. Am I that ununderstandable? “I sleep right after school. Or nap, I guess is more accurate. ‘Cuz I’m usually fully clothed and it’s never really that deep of a sleep. But yeah, I sleep after school. And then I eat dinner, and then I procrastinate till eleven or twelve and by that time I bully myself into doing homework. So yeah, I don’t usually finish until two.” Kendo looks at me incredulously. “How many hours of sleep do you get every night? Like, real sleep. Not napping or dozing.”

You can make her get it.

That’s literally the same thing, just phrased differently. I sigh, already tired of this topic. “I don’t know. I go to bed around three, after I shower, and then I fall asleep around four, most nights,” If he’s quiet. “And I wake up at six thirty on the dot. I jog to school, chugging coffee, although sometimes I run.” If he’s loud. “Then I shower in the locker room. After that I might talk to a teacher or two, and then I come here. School usually starts around half an hour after that point. Usually I doze off or think during that time.” I continue to stare at her, deadpan. She’s staring at me like I grew a third head. “Wha-... Why would you do that to yourself? That’s less than three hours of sleep!” If I’m lucky.  

You can make her as exhausted as you are.

Shut up, that’s your fault. “Yeah. I know. Although, there is my afternoon nap, which is like, three or four hours. I can skip that today though. I can talk with you then. Does that work for you?” She nods and opens her mouth, about to say something. I nod back and quickly turn around. She starts reprimanding Monoma and I relax.

When the lunch bell sounds, I wait a few minutes for the class to thin out before I leave for the English classroom. I don’t want to risk running into Bakugo. Better to make sure he’s had enough time to get to the cafeteria. Once I reach the classroom, there are only a couple of students left to ask their teacher questions before they leave. I lean against the wall and wait for them to leave. Then Present Mic turns to me. “How are things, ‘Toshi?” I take a deep breath. This wasn’t going to be easy, but it’s been a while since I’ve unloaded my problems. “Terrible. I’ve had a headache for a straight week, my trips to school are taking longer and longer, my back hasn’t stopped aching for months, and I can’t get my homework done before two.” I sigh. “I’m tired, Pops. And now, Bakugo and I are enemies, so I have to support that, even though I don’t have the energy for it. To be fair though, it’s fun. I don’t get a lot of that nowadays. And my quirk’s getting louder. I want to deny it, but it’s harder to ignore him. I can barely drown him out anymore. Even with my music blaring in my ears full volume. He needs to be let out. But I can’t cause another incident. I can’t get snitched on. Not again. They didn’t find out the whole thing last time, just that I used my quirk on someone without their permission. They assumed I only did it once. Idiots. He really is getting angry, though. He wants out.” I punch the wall, frustrated. “I need to let him out, or he’ll eat me alive.”

🫶 Love you too, babe.

“SHUT UP!!!” I bang my head on the wall, and Pops is by my side in a second. He pulls me against him and I sob dryly into his shoulder. I’m all out of tears. “We’ll figure this out, ‘Toshi. Together. Have you thought over the alternatives?”

You can make him leave you alone.

“I don’t want to be left alone, idiot! Leave me alone already!” I scream to no one in particular. Pops hugs me tighter. “Nothing else works. You know that.” I say, tired of having this conversation. “I know, I know, you’re right. Okay, do you have someone in mind? The more challenging the better, right? He’ll be quiet quicker then, and for a longer amount of time, right?”

You can make him drop it.

I choke back a sob. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. “Shut up!” There’s a silence as Pops’ breath hitches. “Not you.” I pull back so I can see him clearer. “You’re correct. I have someone in mind, but I think he’s too tricky.” Pops looks somewhat relieved. “That’s good. The more challenging the better. Who is it?”

You can make him stop prying.

He’s not prying. “Bakugo.” Pops is too shocked to say anything. “I know it’s a long shot, but I had to use that person for a month just for him to quiet down for what, double time? Bakugo’s tough. He’ll have fun containing him. Even for just an hour, I could get that same relief. It’s a bit of a long shot, but I’m desperate. Please, just help.” Pops nods and hugs me again. “Do you want me to call him in now? You have about fifteen minutes left of lunch.”

You can make him call him in. Let me out.

“Not yet.” I wince at the headache jab my quirk gives me. “I need to catch him by surprise. Maybe tomorrow morning. There’s plenty of time then. Maybe I’ll go to bed early, see if I can catch him going to school.” Pops nods. “Okay. Good. I can deal for a day. I’ve done it for the past two weeks, I can do it for a day. Thanks, Pops. And, uh, can you-” “I won’t tell Aizawa.” “Thanks.” I leave and walk back to my classroom. I never ate lunch. Oh well, I have some time.

Notes:

Hope you liked that rollercoaster. So, I have to add the angst tag now, which is always fun. Why do you think he doesn't want Aizawa to know? I think I'm going to make this a four fic series, each with a higher rating than the last, so it gets progressively more "Romantic", curse-y and violent. But this one is G. So... For now, it's gonna be pretty mellow. That means there won't be swearing, violence, or even kissing. I know, bummer, but there will be at least one in the next fic, as well as some drama. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Hope you enjoyed!