Chapter Text
Shady Belle – A hidden jewel within the swamps of Lemoyne. The Van Der Linde gang had been pushed even further East thanks to the looming threat of the Pinkerton Detective Agency. The age of the new world was dawning upon them and yet Dutch still insisted on opposing the dangers striving towards them. Water and oil; a tragic tale of what will never be. A fusion to never co-exist.
Time was running out. Yet Dutch still held onto hope. Still. Was it hope? Or selfishness? Did he truly love the very souls whom he led astray or were they pawns in his game of deceit? In this moment, those questions could not be answered with confidence. There was still time. Time to make amends. It all depended on Dutch and those who stood by his side.
Hosea heavily influenced Dutch in the most mundane yet omnipotent way. Being by Dutch’s side all these years had kept the leader on the right path most of the way. He gave Dutch the wings he needed to fly. The voice he needed to preach. The knowledge to keep those they could alive. The love to keep everyone bonded. Hosea had a particular gift in these sorts of things. He was by no means an angel but human. He understood emotions well, having experienced a lifetime of his own trials and tribulations. The elder gentleman was one folk would go to for advice, the one who they approached without hesitation. Even those who hesitated would find themselves at ease after exchanging conversation.
This golden morning, Hosea decided to make his own approach to the one who perhaps needed his guidance the most.
“How you doing, Miss Miriam?” The doe-eyed woman looked up from her book. Upon seeing Hosea, she gave the man a warm smile, twisting her perched figure which sat on the edge of the stone fountain. She straightened out the creases of her dress, somewhat salvaging a respectable appearance despite the sweat which glossed across her skin. She had never experienced such thick, warm air like this before – much like many of the other camp members. The cold was something she thrived in. Frosty mornings and bitter nights had always been her preference.
“Good morning, Mr Matthews. I’m fine, thank you. And yourself?” He ignored her question. His way of words was always to put another in the spotlight. Selfless and soul searching.
“The heat is pretty unbearable?” A small quirk of her bottom lip caught his eye. It made him smile, knowing he was close to breaking down that barrier. Not that he wished to intrude – he only wanted what was best for each member. If that meant breaking down their barriers to help understand them more, then that was a battle he was willing to slowly win.
“It is really hot here…” Hosea pulled his fingers against the inside of his neck tie in agreement.
“I guess you’re not used to the heat.” His statement made Miriam hesitate. In the end, she shook her head with a small smile. The older gent’s eyes scanned her, piecing her together like some intricate puzzle just waiting to be solved. He had been a good judge of character. He knew there was nothing deviant about the young woman. His mind only wondered why she kept so many secrets. Something as big as her identity. To him, it made sense she had to be someone of importance or someone on the run for doing something bad. Or both.
Taking the opportunity, he pressed. “I suppose the cold is more to your liking?” She nodded. This prompted a chuckle from Hosea, thinking of a passing joke. “Then you would have liked it up in them mountains…” His thoughts trailed off, thinking back to that time of darkness for the gang. Letting his head take over, he subconsciously sat down beside Miriam, resting his elbows on his knees. His hands intertwined to lace his fingers together, his head hanging lower in thought. The silence made Miriam look closer at the man. She could read his eyes – how much hurt he had experienced from the past. The slight remnants of fear which resided within. The young woman understood that ‘the mountains’ were not a good time for anyone. She wished to offer words of comfort but how could she when she knew so little about the situation. About their history. It was not her place to. “You ever been up that way? Past Colter?” A shake of her head made Hosea lift his eyebrow. “Too cold for you?” The comment confused her and without thinking she answered.
“No. I love the cold. It’s just been a little too far West for me- the snow that is.” Placing the pieces together quickly in his mind, Hosea effortlessly chimed in leaving her little time to think.
“So East?” Miriam’s eyes opened wide in disturbance. A pause was set between his voice and her own.
“I’m sorry?”
“You’re from the East then.” It wasn’t a question. It was a statement. Goosebumps prickled over the skin of her arms. Her worry became evident to Hosea. He too could read people, just like her. He could do it perhaps a little too well. His eyes shifted down to the ground, not wanting his gaze to cause her any alarm. “I know the country well, Miriam. There are only a few places around here that accommodate to your preferred climate.” She felt herself becoming flustered. She could not allow herself to let him see it so she looked over her shoulder towards the marshy waters. Her eyes searched for something in particular to focus on but her worries made the task difficult. Miriam’s silence spoke a thousand words. Clouds which encased her were gradually starting to part; not without challenge. Thunder flashed through those clouds. Before that mysterious haze could ever clear, the storm would have to present itself. Only then would the suffocation of her secrets could be lifted at last.
Flickering his eyes to her hands, Hosea focused on the book she had been reading prior. He recognised the book cover and the intriguing engravings on the spine of it. “I’ve read that one.” The heat from her head dissipated once she turned her head back to her company. It took her a few seconds to realise what Hosea was referring to. The book offered her so much comfort, therefore a smile was always a response to its very memory.
“It’s my favourite.”
“I’ve noticed.” He stared down at the pages, a coy look present on his face. “You must know the book well if you’re reading it in Spanish.” As quickly as it went, the heat reappeared but this time across her cheeks. Dryly, she swallowed, hoping she could blame her reaction on the heat of the bayou. Hosea was not stupid. There was an aura of omniscience which surrounded him, nothing ever able to get past him. It was down to his caring nature. The want to help people do better and be their best selves. Honest and free.
Unable to fight her nerves, Miriam went to stand and close her book but Hosea’s hand went to her shoulder to stop her. “No – no – no. Please.” His free hand offered her old seat back, inviting her to stay just a little longer. His tone of voice proved to her he meant no harm. She accepted, denying her own departure. Not being too knowledgeable on the language, Hosea referred to the page the book was currently open on. “Which part of the story are you on?”
Breathing calmly through her nose, she settled back into the comfort of her book to accept its embrace. “When the Knight tells the Princess how he truly feels.” Her cheeks darkened yet somehow a smile persevered through to support her words. “You know, at the end?” Hosea nods.
“Ah yes, yes.” He leant over her, scanning over the Spanish text. Despite not knowing the language, he believed he could find the part he wished to enlighten. “The part where he says… ah! Here it is…” His brows furrowed as he attempted to read the foreign words. “Tienes… mi… corazón.” Hosea lifted his head, looking at Miriam with a smile of delicate purity and warmth. “You have my heart.”
“You have my heart.” Miriam repeated in acknowledgement. The Knight saying this to his Princess had always starstruck the young woman. She had wondered evermore what it would feel like to have someone confess their feelings like that. It was truly beautiful to her. To tell someone that they no longer own their heart because it had been claimed by their true love – it was words of poetry which came from the soul. To be so selfless to another. To love them so much you could trust them with something which could be broken so easily. One crunch of their hand could shatter the organ to shake their realm of reality. Such trust was so hard to come by. Although the very thought of having this much faith in someone was deemed as beautiful to her – it also scared her and to Miriam, there was something magical about that.
Observing the peaceful look of wonder which portraited her face, Hosea’s expression softened as he knew that look all too well. A look of yearning which he once held for Bessie. “And what a powerful thing to say to someone.” His eyes looked up to the morning sky, watching a pair of larks which flew over in blissful glee. “It doesn’t matter who you are or where you come from – anyone can feel that moment of power. Only if they allow themselves to.” He turned his head and his eyes locked with Miriam’s who was intrigued by what he was saying. “Love holds no judgement, Miriam. Some would say it is the most powerful force on earth.” His words rattled her yet her heart thumped against her chest in a way which lulled her; as if it was telling her to listen. She shook her head.
“I don’t know what you’re trying to tell me, Mr Matthews.”
“Miriam.” He called her name firmly to silence her. The both of them knew very well what he was insinuating. “It takes a lot to completely destroy love. Sure – someone’s past may cause a few cracks, or – what they once did could hurt – but if that person also trusts you with their heart, then there is nothing to be scared of.” His words moved her. She could not deny the truth in which he spoke yet ever the same, her fear of rejection held her back. Shaking her head, she tried to search his eyes for an answer.
“But how would I know-”
“You won’t know unless you tell them.” Their conversation felt almost hypothetical yet underneath the mystery, they both knew who and what they were talking about. His answer held a double meaning. To tell Javier how she really felt… it also meant telling him the truth. Just like Sadie had once told her.
The thunder within her mind had stopped. Clouds were beginning to clear away and now, all that was left was her thoughts. Her head felt light, no longer heavy to the burden of what she must do. In a way; she felt ready.
It was time.
Seeing Hosea stand up from the fountain made Miriam mouth a quiet thank you to the older man. Hosea acknowledged this but being the man he was, he didn’t wish to pry and make her feel in debt. He brushed it away; another selfless act on his part. He had never once changed; always the man who wished to help others. Even as he began to walk away, he couldn’t help but pass by a comment to help encourage her that her past wasn’t as scary as it seemed.
“I hear Annesburg is lovely this time of year. Especially a little further up North-East from it.” He looked over his shoulder at Miriam. But before she could react, she read his expression which soothed her. In quiet understanding, she knew by the way he spoke and the look he gave her that he wouldn’t utter a word to no one. He knew.
A smile was left behind on her lips.
‘Thank you, Hosea…’
Night had claimed the land fast that day, much to the appreciation of the people. It had been the hottest day of the year thus far, so the night’s cooler air was welcomed with open arms. The clinch of coolness wasn’t the only thing which was welcomed that night.
After Dutch, Arthur and John had met with Angelo Bronte, their return to camp had to be celebrated – Jack had come back safe and sound.
Cheers and laughter encircled the campfire as Javier sung to the strumming of his guitar. A talent he possessed – not just the way he played or sang but his ability to bring his fellow camp members together. He was the glue which bound everyone together, almost completely unbreakable. How Miriam admired that part about him. Looking from afar, she watched him joyously express himself through the lyrics of his song, the others chiming into the chorus with theatrical delight. It made her heart swell to see how together everyone was. It was the happiest she had seen them all.
She wished she was nearer to Javier but she held herself back, wanting him to be with his family. After all, it was a bond she never wanted him to break – only solidify further. Even throughout the day, she had kept her distance from him; ever since her conversation with Hosea. She wanted to figure out the right words to say to him; it had taken her what felt like an eternity to figure out, but she knew she had to do this. Not just for herself, but for him. Javier deserved to know the truth. He had been so good to her.
He found her at her most vulnerable. Took her into the safety of the gang. Explored the Heartlands with her – he even took a bullet for her. Part of her really wanted to know how he felt about her before she could confess everything, however her need to be honest and give her heart to him was stronger. He had asked for her trust and that was what she wanted to give him. Her full, undying trust. No matter how frightening the thought of it was.
She loved him.
The very thought made her heart bubble in her chest like lava waiting to erupt. In the past she tried to push those feelings aside, in fear of the hurt it may cause, but now it invaded her entirely. It was undeniable and inescapable. The chains which encased her had finally rotted enough to the point she could finally break free. All she needed to do was try. And Javier deserved that at the very least.
Leaving the coolness of the night’s air, Miriam retreated back inside the walls of the house which stood strong in the middle of camp. Closing the door behind her, she leant against the wood to take slow, deep breaths. She knew the moment was close. Tauntingly close. Even now she struggled to think of a strong opening line to start this chaotic and somewhat dangerous confession. Knowing the gist of the conversation was easy, but as for what to exactly say – this was unclear. Trying her best to snap out it, Miriam walked through the hallway and into one of the rooms where a mirror hung on the wall. Cautiously she approached it, as if one wrong step could cause it to fall to the ground. That was the last thing she needed – seven years of bad luck. A superstition she most definitely believed in, perhaps even more so after Molly’s pocket mirror broke. Since then, it seemed the poor woman had never gotten a break. She would sometimes see Molly on the outskirts of camp, looking out into the wilderness, mumbling incoherent things about Dutch. It broke Miriam’s heart to see her this way. She had attempted to talk things out with Molly, but she pushed the woman away. She did not want anyone’s company other than Dutch’s; which was something he could not give her.
Looking into the mirror, Miriam’s reflection shone back at her through distorted cracks. The cracks were like veins which jaggedly etched their way along the centre to the corners of the frame. Subconsciously, she brought a hand to her hair, stroking down the fly aways. How humbled she felt about her appearance. Javier was strikingly handsome to look at, yet she felt the complete opposite about herself. She found it comical the idea of Javier finding her as attractive as she found him. In her irrational mind, there was just no way. She sighed, hopelessly. Yet her eyes wandered to the dress she was wearing.
After all this time, she had finally finished weaving together the dress she started making back in Horseshoe Overlook. Despite Javier’s kindness in buying her the dresses back in Strawberry, Miriam felt it a waste to abandon her project. The dress was made from silky, scarlet fabric which was made to fit her exact measurements. It held no long sleeves but her shoulders were crowned with the smallest black ruffles. The neck line had shaped a most magnificent V-shape which complimented her décolletage. Following the waist line down, the ruche of the skirt had been pinned up to create a gothic-style waterfall effect on the sides and through the opening of the outer skirt, black lace fell to the ground as the underskirt. The dress created a feeling of pride which was new to the young woman. She wanted this to be the dress. The dress she would confess to Javier in. It made her feel empowered yet vulnerable and that was something she felt fascinated by.
“My, my. Don’t you look pretty in that getup.” A chill ran down her spine, recognising that voice. Miriam whipped her head over her shoulder, fast enough to cause a couple strands of locks to fall from her clipped-up hair. Micah stood in the doorway, leaning lazily against the wooden frame. He shifted his weight so he now stood straight, ready to approach. “Who’re you getting’ dolled up for, I wonder…” Not wanting to give him the time of day, she stayed silent. She knew all too well that people like him craved responses. Tauntingly, he stepped towards her which immediately caused Miriam to fully turn to face him to stand her ground. Much like the time back in the cabin, where she was cornered by the O’Driscolls.
The clicks of Micah’s boots echoed through the room like the sound of a ticking clock. Her shoulders tensed but never once did she break eye contact from him. He stopped walking once he was a couple metres away from her, wanting her to fall into a false sense of safety. One thing was certain – being alone in a room with Micah Bell was never something safe and she was smart enough to know this.
A snicker trickled past his lips, holding out his hands to gesture inwardly to himself. “Is this all for me?” A look of disgust shadowed over Miriam’s face. If only a look could really kill someone, he would be nothing more than a corpse before her. Clenching her jaw, Miriam remained composed before the serpent, still having no intention of giving in to his sick game. Micah tilted his head with his mouth slightly agape, soaking in her defensive state. That scowl she held for him… he found it utterly delicious. “Let’s take a good look at you…”
Before she could react, his hand grasped her jaw, the tips of his fingers pinching into the skin of her cheeks. In defiance she tried to shake herself from his grip by snapping her head to the side but he only squeezed her face tighter to make her heel. Not wanting to be permanently injured by his hand, she stilled, keeping her gaze away. His breathing was heavy, like he was fighting for crystal clear air. The smell of her was almost too intoxicating for him to handle. His eyes scanned over her features, looking at the shade of her glossy lips to the colour of her eyes and sighing in bliss when she would batt those pretty lashes which each blink. The grip of his hand loosened just slightly so he could angle his thumb up towards her waterline where black kohl had been carefully pencilled across. Wanting to taint the remarkable portrait before him, his thumb brushed across the bottom of her eye to smear the black eyeliner down past her outer corners. He snickered at the art he had just created.
Now she looked fragile – as though she had been crying.
“Ain’t you just… pretty.” He licked the top of his lip, his warm breath coming through his nose like a bull in heat. “Nasty little thing, dressin’ up for ol’ Micah…” His thumb went back to the start of her waterline to once again follow along, but this time, he dragged his digit downwards once he reached the middle. A smoky smear fell to the apple of her cheek. His thumb was rough and he had pressed hard, causing a streak of faint redness to appear behind the ashy smears. How appetising she looked like this. Like a forbidden fruit he so desperately wanted to take a bite from. Being so close to her, a couple strings of breathy laughter escaped him. He found it funny. The joke of it all; how easy it would be to take her right now whilst everyone was occupied outside.
The fantasy of her crying for help whilst all the other gang members would be nonchalantly celebrating, not able to hear her pleas at all. It was the perfect opportunity. Quickly, his mind pieced together a delectable scenario. He’d smash the back of her head against the mirror, just so show her how much fun he can be. Then he’d throw her like a little dolly onto the cold wooden floor before taking her from behind. Oh, how the sounds of her dress being ripped apart would stiffen his cock. He would be entertained for a long while…
His smirk disappeared at his next intruding thought. ‘Unless he interferes…’ Anger flashed across Micah’s face which resulted in his hand clasping round her jaw again and this time, forcing her to look at him. “Or is this all for that fucking greaser, hm?” Now it was Miriam’s turn to see red. Without even a second thought, she pursed her lips before releasing them to spit into Micah’s face. The action was so sudden it took him a back, making him let go of her in the process. She took her chance to escape and bolted through the doorway and towards the grand doors which would lead her outside. He didn’t attempt to chase after her, instead using his preferred tactic to hunt his prey – threats.
“If you don’t come back here… I’ll fucking destroy your world. I know who you are.” Gritting his teeth, he walked towards the doorframe once he wiped the spit from his eyes. “And what you did.” He stopped once he was back in the doorway. This time he had his fists held tightly in a ball and his posture was hunch over, as if ready to charge at her. “If you walk out that door, I’ll tell your little greaser everything.” She could no longer ignore what he had to say. It enraged her the way he spoke about Javier like he was some form of weapon to be used against her, calling him those horrible derogatory names. Silence was no longer an option.
Snapping her head over her shoulder, she hissed her words. “You won’t have chance. I’ll be telling him tonight.” Her surge of confidence caught Micah off guard. She had a mean bite to her and it replaced his anger with excitement.
“Oh, really now?” For the last time, she turned around to fully face him.
“Yes. You have no power over me, Micah.” It sent chills over his body the way she snarled out his name. If he played his cards right, he could still make the world around her crumble. Micah had always had a sick desire to see beauty decay. It was the most natural form of art to him.
Micah held his hands up, as if to surrender. “Oh, ho. You got me there, sweetheart…” His tone of voice leered over her, spookily, like he knew something she did not. “I’m just thinking about that Mexican’s wellbeing is all.” Her eyebrows knitted closer together, confused by his change of heart. He smirked, knowing his new tactic was working. He took a step towards her, his hands still raised in sweet surrender. “It would be such a… shame… to see him – burdened with such knowledge.” Now he took a couple more steps closer, almost halfway across the landing. Slowly, Miriam’s eyebrows softened as though she could see her victory being taken away before her very eyes.
“… a burden?” Micah stopped himself from grinning. ‘Jackpot.’ He thought to himself. He knew very well which direction to take this conversation.
“Of course. I mean, when I discovered what you were, well… I was shocked. And that’s puttin’ it lightly- I mean…” Micah lowered his hands. His tone changed. “… ya did some real nasty things after all.” The young woman flinched at his words. “What you did… oof-” The blonde dropped his head momentarily, only to raise it slowly to look at her through his messy strands of hair which cascaded over his brows. “No normal person could ever look at ya the same way ever again.” Her blood turned cold at the horrifying thought. It felt unbearable, the idea of Javier shunning her away after discovering her past. She felt her eyes begin to sting with tears but she refused to let them fall, especially in front of Micah. Such a sight could not slip past Micah. Those tears which threatened to spill only fuelled him further. His hands hovered over her shoulders but he didn’t dare to touch.
“Sweetheart… I know it’s hard.” He didn’t have the faintest idea. “Ya just gotta understand… that greaser had his family and friends drop like flies, one by one. Murdered in front of him… so…” Micah tauntingly tilted his head side to side, as though he was weighing the options of what to say. “… it only makes sense he wouldn’t react well to what ya did. He’d hate you.” Her blood felt as though it were ice. For a moment, it felt impossible for her to breathe. Micah’s words made perfect sense. She convinced herself then and there that she had gaslighted herself into thinking that everything would be okay. Of course, there was no way Javier would be able to look past the things she did.
Not wanting to spend another second in Micah’s presence, she went to open the door but Micah’s hand held onto her wrist to pause her action. “Oi.” He growled, bringing her close into his chest. The dark-haired beauty frowned, still fighting the sting of her eyes. He lifted his hand and instead of grabbing her jaw again like last time, he curled his index finger and softly petted it over her cheek. “Don’t ya worry, doll. Ol’ Micah will be here to pick up the pieces.” He leant close to her face, his lips just a couple centimetres away from her own. “If ya tell him.” And just like that, he released her and she immediately ran out, slamming the doors in his face.
Her feet pattered down the steps and across the grass until she could find shelter under the gazebo, just a little away from the camp’s celebrations. She tried to calm her breathing although not a sound of it could be heard due to the rambunctious singing from both Uncle and Pearson. Even Arthur could be heard trying to join in, carefully trying to not slur his words due to the amount of whiskey he had consumed.
Looking to her hands, the young woman realised the shake that now rocked them uncontrollably. Her ears burned hot; her throat too dry to be able to swallow. Attempting to steady herself, Miriam’s hands rested on the pale wood of the banister and sank her head low to calm her rhythm of breaths once she wiped away her ruined eyeliner.
She knew Micah was not to be trusted; his words were a sorcery of evil. Malice was something he thrived to express. He was like a disease, persisting to take over and destroy something once good from the inside out. Yet those very words he spoke only awakened Miriam’s once buried paranoia. Just as she had at last calmed herself into thinking her past could not break the bond she shared with Javier, a threat loomed in its grand return to make her back down. Deep down, she still wanted to tell Javier the truth. Uneasiness plagued her at the scenario.
What if…
What if Micah spoke honesty, no matter how hurtful it came out? Would it be a burden for Javier? Would he…
‘Would he hate me?’ She bit the inside of her cheek; the taste of iron spilling in slow droplets down her throat. Would he or wouldn’t he. A riddle she could not solve. It was a gamble. A leap of faith.
Being so lost in her troubled thoughts, she had barely noticed the familiar presence behind her whose hands rested on the plumps of her hips. “Hola, hermosa ángel.” Regardless of her agonising thoughts, Miriam couldn’t help but melt under his touch. She breathed out his name, savouring it as though it was the last time she would ever be able to say it.
His hands stroked her hips a couple times, like he was soothing her for something he wasn’t quite aware of in that moment. With a feather-like touch, Javier’s hands slid over the peaks of her hips to take their place over her belly. The feeling was welcomed for it offered a warmth she did not mind faltering to. His chin rested over her shoulder which allowed Miriam to smell the whiskey and cigarettes that came from his long breaths. It was a smell she found appetizing and often salivated for during steamy exchanges.
“I haven’t seen you all day…” He mumbled, now turning into her neck to smell the gorgeously scented perfume which he found suited her and only her. A scent of lavender and powdery notes. Miriam pressed her back against his chest to allow him to fully hold her. His eyes were shut with the lightest of smiles, appreciating the tender fragment of time that stood still for their sake. A snapshot of gentle peace.
“I was… lost in thought, today.” He hummed at her response, finding it an acceptable answer for the time being. The tips of her fingers lightly traced over the knuckles of his hands. Even now, her thoughts troubled her deeply – yet his aura soothed her, preventing her from breaking down to the corruption Micah had caused. “I- My mind has been all over the place. I’m sorry.” A low rumble came from Javier’s throat in an understanding chuckle.
“Mine too.” His hands snaked past one another, tightening his embrace. His cheek pressed against the length of Miriam’s neck where his lips dusted across her skin in a sweet whisper. “I can’t get you off my mind, mi amor.” His lips and facial hair tickled her skin, causing her to momentarily break away from her intrusive thoughts in soft laughter.
“You’ve been drinking.” Turning her head to try and look at his expression, she could see his cheeks were slightly glazed with a pigment of rosiness. His eyes held a mist of heavenly delight, finding all things around him pleasant. Not denying her words, he raised the depths of his focus by looking into her dark hazel eyes.
“I speak only the truth.” His eyes closed lazily to fall into a blissful realm, allowing his lips to dance across her jawline and then the corner of her neck, underneath her ear. “Mi amor…” He whispered this line over and over again with each feathery kiss. Goosebumps responded back to him, giving in to the enchantment he cast over her. She held onto his arms to keep her from stumbling, bending at the knees as though she was becoming limp like a doll held by its owner. “Look at me.”
Javier loosened his hold on her so she could eventually turn around to face him. There were things he wanted to tell her which had been occupying him all throughout the day. Perhaps longer. Delving into the wondrous pools of her iris, he felt his chest seize for a brief moment. It amazed him how this woman standing before him had such a hold over his mind, body and feelings. Never in his twenty-six years of being on this earth had he felt this way before. It was foreign, shrouded in mystery; nonetheless a hold he never wanted to let go.
“Listen.” Javier stepped back from her, tilting his head down to the ground and raising his hands in front of him as though halting any attempt to interrupt him. “I’ve been thinking- I’ve been thinking, a lot… and…” He lifted his head and in doing so he placed his hands on his hips before rapidly flickering his thumb over the tip of his nose to brush off the last bits of nerves that had held him back before now. “You and I- We… I think…” He stopped himself.
The way she looked at him. It captivated him. She without a doubt took his breath away; without even trying. Her mere existence was enough to shake the ever-winding staircase of his reality. She had always captivated him. Ever since he first looked at her within that cabin. A short exhale of realisation escaped him.
“I think we’re good together.” He said it so matter of a fact, that his awkwardness had successfully been disguised by his liquid courage.
Miriam’s eyes became wide with surprise, not expecting him to say such things. She kept quiet, unable to find the right words to say. Javier stroked the back of his neck, not knowing how he made it this far. However, he understood that he had to finish what he had started. “I mean, only if you want that too.” Now the Mexican found himself second guessing how he approached his words. He wanted to continue to plead his case because of course, she was someone whom he wanted to fight for. “Look-” He stepped towards her; his hands now being held out to gesture with each word that needed visual guidance. “What I mean to say is- I don’t care about what you did, who you are or where you came from. None of that matters.” Miriam’s eyebrows furrowed upwards, her mouth becoming agape – not believing what he was saying. Javier’s hand held onto hers. His fingers squeezed tight to the following words. “I want you. Only you.” With his free hand, he gently placed his palm over her heated cheek. “Just as you are.” The words he uttered cut through her like a welcomed wound. A wound which hurt but distracted her from her anxious thoughts. He made her heart bleed with sweet sorrow.
She wanted him too. To Miriam, Javier deserved the world and more.
Pursing her lips together, Miriam tightly closed her eyes to lean into the hand which held her cheek. He was so warm, like the water of a hot spring steaming against ice cold skin. “Javier…” Bringing her hand to his own, she pulled it down from her cheek. “I’m not the woman you think I am…” A pause of hesitancy followed before she let go of his hands to hold her own. Javier looked at her with hurt in his eyes, as though he had been shot through his chest. It pained her to do this, but the taunt of Micah’s words could not allow her to let her walls fall apart. She allowed him to have her heart, but she could not do the same for him. She feared so much that his heart would die by her tainted touch. Her bottom lip quivered before she looked at him with tearful eyes. She could barely choke out her words. “But I wish I was. I truly do.”
Javier averted his eyes from her. For the first time, he did not know what to do. All he could do was look at to her, almost in disbelief. With all his strength, he set his hurt aside and tried to reach through to her. “Miriam…” He made a promise to himself. “Eres tan estupida…” (“You’re so stupid…”)
A promise that he would fight for her.
Both of Javier’s hands held onto her face to bring her back to this dimension. “¿Cuántas veces tengo que decírtelo?” (“How many times do I have to tell you?”) Her watery eyes blurred her vision yet she could still see the intense look of truth he emitted. “I don’t care.” A smile returned to his face, his sharp gaze softening. “I don’t care, Miriam.” He frowned yet his smile remained. “Don’t you remember?” Before she could respond to his question, Javier pulled on her hand so she would follow him.
They left the shelter of the gazebo, walking just outside of Shady Belle by the water yet remained concealed by the trees and greenery. They couldn’t wander too far due to the main road only being just up ahead. Once Javier stopped, he pointed up to the night sky. The galaxy of stars twinkled back in response, shining through the grey clouds which surrounded the moon. “You remember, don’t you?”
The organ within her chest tightened at the memory of those beautiful words. Without saying anything, she nodded. But he wanted more. He wanted her to fight back – to succumb to the feelings they both could not deny. “Then say them.” Her eyes tightly closed, her lips pursing back together.
She could not bring herself to say those words.
Javier held onto her waist, bringing her towards him so their hips met one another. “Say them to me, mi amor.” Their foreheads touched, his eyes trying to find hers through her thick lashes – still her irises were averted from his.
He deserved the truth.
His fingers tightened on her waist. His whispers became more soaked with passion. “I need to know.”
And the truth is what she wished to give.
“Javier… Tienes mi corazón.” Those words ripped through him like a rainfall of bullets. He pulled his head back, looking at her with shock. At last, he could see her alluring cocoa eyes. Her hand went to her chest as if to soothe the pain and ache she felt there. “Tienes mi corazón, Javier.” Her tears spilt down her cheeks, uncontrollably. Her walls had fallen to dust thanks to him. She felt exposed and vulnerable. And she was so grateful. Somehow her revelation made her feel lifted; unafraid. “And it will always be yours.”
No longer did a barrier stand between the two thus the only thing to be done was to fall into each other’s reality. He claimed her lips with his own, not caring that it sucked the air from her. He could not help himself after she had told him such euphoric words. Never did he think he would hear her say those words to him, especially in his language. Those three words spoke a million tales, matching up to each star that dotted the galactic sky. His reaction made Miriam cry more, the lump in her throat becoming so painful she could barely breathe. To others it would seem as though she was in pain. Forlorn and distressed. But the two of them knew that it was an articulation of happiness and that was all that mattered.
Miriam fought for air but was unable to win due to Javier’s hand holding onto the back of her head, pushing her further against his mouth. His tongue tangled around hers, barely allowing room for her to inhale. A meagre jolt of panic naturally took over her yet her own body betrayed her, keeping her pinned into his strong embrace. Colourful spots sparkled behind her closed eyes, signalling her impending downfall. She murmured his name against his mouth, revealing her desperation.
Not wanting her to pass out, just yet, he pulled his lips from her and watched the saliva slip over the centre of her bottom lip. Perilously she gasped out for air but was immediately silenced by his lips. She squirmed in ecstatic delight. The very thought of seeing stars just by him kissing her sent waves of paradise towards her core. She trusted this man to do whatever he wanted, knowing he never would have an inkling if ill malice. Her hands ran through his hair, unconsciously pulling away the band which held his hair back. His velvet ebony locks touched his shoulders where his blue waistcoat hugged against the white fabric of his blouse.
“Tienes mi corazón…” She whispered against his lips, repeating those words he found so beautiful. His hand clenched, grabbing a fistful of her hair. She mewled in contentment at the rough action.
“Mierda…” He grumbled, the tightening feeling of jeans around his groin which became uncomfortable all too quickly. The way she said those words, it was driving him fucking crazy. Pulling the clip that held her hair back, her mermaid-like waves fell past her shoulders like unravelled silk. All those feelings which held him back before, those chains no longer claimed him. Instead, he was finally free to do as he desired. No restraints or second thoughts. Only what felt right to both himself and her.
Javier’s hands grabbed Miriam’s ass, crunching together the carefully woven fabric she had seamed and lifted her without warning. Instinctively, her legs wrapped around his waist where her bare pussy caught his jeans just right, the tent of the fabric rubbing against her clit. The skirt of her dress covered the sight, but underneath, it was a vision to behold – one Javier could feel. The roughness of his jeans caused a friction which made her hips buck involuntarily. The sharp sparks of pleasure which flew through her like flashes of lightning made Miriam throw her head back, leaning her weight away from him so her hips had no choice but to force themselves harder against his concealed yet prominent cock. It didn’t take long for her slick to begin coating his jeans, as if her pussy was begging skin on skin contact. Without shame, Miriam bobbed her hips up and down the tiniest amount to rub her clit over the point of his jeans. Due to the ridged nature of his jeans, her clit became instantly swollen, enjoying the friction more than she imagined she would. Her wetness rapidly dampened the fabric and with aid was soaked further by his leaking tip. The thought of his precum seeping through to invade her pussy made her eyes roll back to see the stars.
The feeling of her hips rocking against his erection made Javier open his mouth to invite in the cool air in hopes it would help him re-centre himself – to stop him from fucking her so furiously that she would surely lose consciousness. Yet he reminded himself that all restraints were to be forgotten about. Just for this night at least. He wrapped an arm around her upper back and knelt down to the ground to place her on the grass, all the while keeping their hips connected like this. Her hips were raised, angled upwards over his thighs and he kept her like this so he could unzip his jeans to pull out his aching cock. In doing so, his fingers brushed over the area of his pants where their liquids seeped through. With the tip of his middle finger and thumb, he brought them up to his face and rubbed the slick together before retracting his middle finger away to watch the string of clear fluid stretch.
“Mi amor… if you keep doing things like this, I won’t be able to stop myself.” Through her flushed pants, she quizzed her lover.
“Stop yourself from what?” Innocently she blinked which caused Javier to arch over her, pressing his leaking head inside of her without warning. Not giving her a single chance to adjust, Miriam’s head fell back so her forehead was inches away from meeting the grass. Keeping her hips angled up towards the sky, Javier pressed a kiss to her exposed throat, growling against her skin.
“Fucking you until you’re full of my cum, mi amor.” The walls of her pussy clenched hard around the tip of his cock, milking him in response to his words. The two of them gasped in symmetry at the rapturous feeling. The tightness of her heat made it difficult to sheathe himself fully inside but once he did, he hung his head low between his shoulders, panting. His fingers dug into the earth to ground himself whilst Miriam tried her best not to make any sudden movements, still recovering from the brief moment of sheer bliss.
Soon, a laughter that was barely audible came from Javier. He lifted his head, looking through the messy strands of his hair to address his love. “You like the idea of that, hm?” With eagerness in her movements, she nodded her head to him; the memory of him almost coming inside her dancing around rent free in her head. She could still remember how hot the heat of his cum felt inside, even if it was only a drop. Her pussy spasmed again, wishing to be filled this time instead of it being wasted on her lower abdomen. He grunted, pulling his cock back until he was almost fully free from her.
Keeping the tip of his cock lined at her entrance, Javier pulled her thighs up and folded them back so her knees came to a beautiful bend. Her shoes slipped off her feet so her heels pressed into the rounds of her ass. He let go of her plump skin, watching her dress skirt pool around her chest – the sight of her pulsing pussy now on full view. That and her big doe eyes all tearful from sinful want, were a picture of perfection to the Mexican rebel. His hands traced over her knees, pushing them further apart before planting a kiss to one of them. He raised himself a little higher on his knees to get his angle right and once he was there, he slammed his cock deep and hard into her pussy; reaching depths Miriam didn’t even know was possible. The earth surrounding Miriam’s head sank lower, being pressed with great force by the back of her skull. A noise had left her mouth she didn’t even know could ever be recreated even if she tried. That very noise made her lover see red and repeated the violent snap of his hips over and over, earning a unique and satisfying moan from her each time.
The head of his cock abused her insides, forcing her heat to overflow with more of her slick in a pathetic attempt to soothe the overstimulation which was being invoked. Her head was dizzy, unable to think rationally whilst he pounded into her pussy like she was just some tight hole for him to let his frustrations out on. “Oh my God… Javier! Javier!” Her sanity was long gone, no care being present to fear what others might hear. She felt his hands pull harder on her knees, bringing her hips impossibly closer to his own; Miriam became a babbling mess. He hit depths within her that shot fiery sparks of gunpowder through her core all the way to her head. Her toes curled, bracing herself for his ruthlessness that would undoubtedly continue.
Already, her pussy squeezed his cock, ready to deliver its final chokehold. Javier placed an elbow and hand beside her head whilst the other rested in the same manner but above her head. Not once did his unforgiving thrusts change in pace. “Mi amor- Ah! Miriam…” His voice was quiet through the loudness of his grunts, yet as though the elements of nature respected their moment of union, Miriam heard him clear as day. “Te amo.”
‘Those words…’
She hiccupped, feeling the swell of her heart become unbearable. Javier kissed her forehead. “Te amo… te amo…” He never stopped saying those words. With every thrust, every pant and groan, he cooed those words to her. He would say it as many times as it took for her to finally understand. She felt her head ache, still unable to stop herself from crying. All she could do was place her hand on his cheek and kiss the corner of his mouth.
Even then, he still did not stop.
‘He loves me…’ The happiest smile she had ever conjured in her entire lifetime graced her features. ‘He really loves me…’
Being close to his release, Javier shuddered, his head falling lower to try and stop himself. He could feel she was close too. She could tell by his silence he was trying hard not to give in, selflessly wanting her to come before he did – yet each time it risked him coming inside. Breaking his concentration, Miriam brought her lips to his ear, begging him in a sultry voice.
“Please, come inside-ah! Javier! Please…” Miriam raised both her shoulders in a euphoric high, knighting each side of his face as his forehead now came into contact with the bottom of her throat. His nails scratched hard at the dirt, whilst her own snaked under his arms and latched onto his shoulder blades. Her nails pierced in through the fabric of his waistcoat, not realising she was in fact drawing blood. Even Javier couldn’t feel it, due to the feeling of his cock pulsating inside her becoming overwhelming. “Please…” She lowered the volume of her voice but kept a higher pitch than normal – something she naturally did when she wanted something bad. “Javier… I want you to come inside me. Make me yours.”
Like a cryptic code being cracked, it unlocked the shackles which bound him. A second wind of energy eloped through his body like an untameable hurricane. The rhythm of his hips became faster, more ruthless with no remanets of gentleness. He wanted nothing more in that moment than for her wishes to be granted. And for his own – to have her as his – whole and complete. Sweat glossed down the muscles of his back, sticking to his garments which caused an imaginary suffocation as his climax overcame him, spurting his hot cum inside her weeping pussy. He pressed his hips hard into her and stayed like that, as if his only goal was to make sure her womb became full of his fertile seed. Upon the first contact of his cum, her pussy clenched and pulsed around his length, milking each and every drop as Miriam experienced her own ascension. His cum felt excruciatingly hot but it only heightened her senses and made her journey to paradise all the more heavenly.
The feeling of her taking all of him so receptively was something he cursed himself for not experiencing sooner. He didn’t want the moment to end – even during the peak of his high, he slipped his hand between her thighs to rub his thumb over her clit in circles. The elation she felt from his unexpected action made Miriam snap her hips into his, forcing his cock deeper creating more room for his cum to splurge through. The overstimulation made the young woman shake violently, her pussy now refusing to release her hold on his cock. Javier groaned loud into her throat, the noise emanating from deep within.
Finally, with the last few rocks of his hips, he pulled his cock from inside her, the spoils of his climax spilling out with the friction of his length. Once he had fully unsheathed himself, due to her hips being pointed at a high angle, any droplets of cum which surrounded the circumference of her heat fell back inside. The sight of her cum-filled pussy made Javier’s cock twitch, threatening to become hard again. Her puffy cunt pulsed, drinking back every last drop until it was deep inside her warm cavern.
Attempting to wipe away her tears, the mundane fidgeting caught Javier’s attention, him only now realising just how badly she had been crying. Once he tucked himself away, he leant over her to brush his thumb over her watery cheeks.
“Hey…” He cooed. He thought her tears were a product of their love-making but seeing her continue spill them made the man feel genuine concern. A flash of hurt sparkled across his coffee-coloured eyes as she scrunched her nose and tried her best to wipe away anymore tears that were left behind. “Did I hurt you?” A crackle of laughter bubbled past her lips, shaking her head to him.
“No.”
“Then why are you crying?” That wide, close-eyed smile returned once more and this time he was there to witness her expression of joy.
“I’m… I’m just so happy.” A charming look graced Javier’s features.
“Yeah?” Miriam nodded, humming her confirmation. He closed his eyes in contentment. “Me too, mi amor.” Javier lifted her own delicate hand towards his face. With a look of faraway dreams, he placed the softest of kisses against her fingers. To finally hear her speak such honeyed words to him and he in return at long last came to terms with his deep-rooted feelings he held for her – the shadows within his mind felt less dark than before. His demons had been blinded by her luminescent light.
He couldn’t help but consider if she was an angel sent by God. Or a Saint sent to guide him through the darkness that threatened to take over.
Whoever she was, or whomever had sent her, he knew he had to appreciate every waking second with her. Time threatened all beings.
He vowed silently, on that warm summer’s night, that he would devote himself to her and strive for a life where they could be free.
Together.