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4 times Killjoy smiles at Viper and 1 time Viper smiles back.
1.
It happened as Viper went through the procedure of showing the girl around on her first day. Usually, this was Sage’s task –Viper thinks dimly– but due to personal reasons, god knows what, the job was passed onto Viper. Even to Viper, she finds herself unfit for the position. It might be due to her tendency to come off as scary and threatening.
But Viper thinks she might have to think twice on that statement because Killjoy seemed unfazed by her cold shoulder. On the contrary, Killjoy was quite fond of talking her ear off as if they were friends. Viper scowls, moving to the side when Killjoy walks a bit too close. Annoying .
She doesn’t know what the girl was saying but it seemed loaded and along with the ambition and vigour in Killjoy’s eyes, Viper can tell the topic excited her. Though, if anyone asked what was being talked about, Viper can’t answer because she honestly doesn’t care. The one thing on her mind was to get back to her lab to finish those damned lab reports.
“So, you see, I’d really love to work with you sometimes!” That sentence somehow reached her ears, though Viper doesn’t know why. Sighing, the older woman turned towards Killjoy. “Will you stop rattling off for a minute? You haven’t stopped talking since we started at the lobby,” Viper decides against using curse words, in fear of breaching the boundaries of professionalism.
That seemed to shut the girl up but Viper can’t quite place why she feels unease settle in her stomach. She has this disgusting feeling to say something… to– she doesn’t even know why– mend or take back her words. Her face scrunches at the thought, wondering why her feelings were so strong in seeing Killjoy deflating. She was quite out of her element today.
“Apologies, Viper. It won’t happen again,” the girl says, looking to the ground. But as Viper stares in silence, contemplating whether to say something or not, Killjoy squares her shoulders and smiles, “Shall we continue?.
And Viper understands now– why she feels bad. It’s the upturn of Killjoy’s lips, the one that doesn’t reach her eyes. It’s unsettling.
But she doesn’t say those. Instead, she nods, “Good,”.
~~~
2.
Viper slides across the dimly lit halls of the protocol, much like a snake. She knows the time and she should be sleeping but she can’t. She’s got a lot of energy to burn and she wants to experiment with her new poison. Which is why she could be found standing in the kitchen in silence, waiting for the coffee to brew.
But what surprises her, is when someone else slinks right next to her, dropping onto the kitchen stool. “Killjoy?” she can’t hide the shock, in fact, doesn’t even try to. The girl looked awful, with heavy bags under her eyes and a pout on her lips. Viper knows she can’t look much different but Killjoy looks really bad. Concerningly bad. And Viper isn’t easily fazed by the conditions of others.
“Hey, Viper,” the girl says, though doesn’t explain herself as she lays her head into the folds of her arms. Usually, Viper doesn’t even have to ask for the girl to talk. “Why are you awake?” Viper pauses. “At 3.45?”.
Killjoy sits up this time, shrugging and giving a sleepy smile. “I mean, why are you? Haha… guess you can’t really say anything about me, can you?” She looks at Viper lazily but the gaze was intense and Viper matches Killjoy with her own.
“Well, I’m your superior. And you should’ve been asleep hours ago. So, yes actually. I do have a say in your unfortunate wellbeing,” Viper tilts her head in challenge. Killjoy lifts her head, interested. She levels Viper with a blank look but shrugs it off, “Alright then. If you want to know so badly,” Killjoy enunciates a few words that evokes an annoyed reaction from Viper. “I’ve just been catching up on– uh…, tinkering. You would know, you’re a fellow inventor yourself,”.
Viper rolls her eyes because she can’t say anything to that now, can she? Though, she admits she admires Killjoy for the dedication. Not many young people these days take anything seriously anymore.
“Well,” Viper says as she’s done with preparing her coffee. “Make sure to rest up in the evening, at least. We don’t need dead weight in our hands,”. Killjoy somehow finds it in herself to nod and smile at that, muttering an, “Ouch. Tough crowd,”.
Eventually, much later in the day, Viper locks eyes with Killjoy in the common room. They don’t say anything, not that Viper would ever initiate a conversation willingly. But Killjoy waves at her with a smile. A smile that should be criminal.
~~~
3.
It’s two or so years later, maybe. Viper doesn’t keep track of the time, honestly. Who cares how old she is now anyway? Plus, she takes it day by day because there’s too many tasks and things to be done to even think of what the future holds.
But Viper stalls, hearing the crunch of boots under the earthy ground. She steadies her breathing. And as the figure walks directly under the sun, making their shadow visible, Viper gets ready to strike. However, she jumps when a gunshot rings in the air, beating her to it as the body falls forward.
Immediately, Viper’s head whips to the side, finding a victorious smile on Killjoy’s face. She doesn’t ponder on why the girl seemed so happy after killing someone. She catches herself staring as Killjoy turns towards her.
“Viper!” Ah , she turned her head a fraction of a second too late.
“I killed someone with an Operator! And yes, before you even ask, it’s my first time using the Operator,” Killjoy laughs, approaching Viper with ease in her shoulders. She looked so relaxed Viper almost forgets that they were still on duty. Almost because she’s not third-in-command for no reason.
Viper reaches out to pull Killjoy behind the tree with her. The girl yelps but Viper pushes her to the ground. “Focus. We’re on a mission, Killjoy. I shouldn’t have to remind you,” she says exasperatedly, unwilling to meet eyes with the girl’s.
“Every small victory should be celebrated, liebe ! But that aside, were you worried about me just now?” Killjoy laughs softly at the horrified look on Viper’s face. The tension was palpable as Viper scrambles her mind for something to say. And as nothing comes up, she mutters a low, “Piss off,”.
Viper keeps her guard high for the both of them. She has a sense that Killjoy is not done talking yet –when is she ever–.
“Aren’t you happy about it!” Viper looks at Killjoy, wondering what she was referring to. But her words die on her tongue. Killjoy’s smile is like a breath of fresh air. Her white set of teeths shine under the sunlight and her eyes crease at the sides. Viper even sees the grime on her face but Killjoy doesn’t look bad. Not at all.
She snaps out of the momentary reverie. “I had him there. You stole my kill,” It was lame even for her but the Sun and the heat today was so overbearing, she couldn’t think of much to say anyway. And when Viper expects her to deflate, just like on the day they first met, Killjoy doesn’t. Instead, she leans back before throwing her arms around Viper’s shoulders. “A win is a win! It was a team effort, liebe !”
Viper feels the harsh body of the Operator hit her sides. She feels Killjoy’s heavy weight on her shoulder, pulling her down but not quite falling. And yet, Viper can’t help but look away, only able to shrug off the weight on her shoulders. “Get off me,”
~~~
4.
“Well?” Viper asks, annoyed. She’s leaning against the doorframe of her bedroom, wondering why on earth Killjoy knocked on her door so early in the morning. She wasn’t woken up by the knock, more so just irritated by the fact that she has to be talking to someone at 6 in the morning.
“Uh, do you wanna get breakfast with me?” Killjoy asks, smiling sheepishly. Though, Viper notices she doesn’t seem scared… just shy. Huh .
Viper tilts her head, shifting her weight to her other leg. “And why do you think I would want that?” she asks, not out of malice but curiosity. She doesn’t think her presence is ever calming and inviting to anyone. More so, Killjoy who loves to talk. Viper isn’t exactly a good companion.
Killjoy shrugs instead, “Nobody else is awake right now. And… knowing you, your daily coffee intake is right about now, am I wrong?”. And Viper’s stuck there because she didn’t think anybody would even take notice of when she takes her coffee. Afterall, it’s the most insignificant piece of information ever.
“Alright. I’ll see you at the cafeteria in 10,” she says, unsure herself why she agreed to it.
Sure enough, 10 or so minutes later, as she walks into the canteen, she finds Killjoy already situated at one of the tables, eating her one piece of bread with content hums. Viper often wonders how the girl is so… appreciative of everything. It’s not easy to be, especially in their line of work. But, good for her, honestly.
“So…” Killjoy starts, swallowing her last bite just as Viper sits down. The older woman looks up from her tray of assortments of fruits. “What’re your plans for today?” Killjoy smiles, placing her head in her hands as she leans forward. It’s cute how attentive Killjoy was being towards her. Viper couldn’t find it in her to reply with snark. Instead, she says, “Experiments, briefings and… I think I have to look over the south gate’s renovation,”.
Killjoy nods, casualness written on her face. And Viper feels her body relaxing at the calmness of it all. Perhaps this decision wasn’t entirely bad, after all.
“I have a feeling you have something else to say so go ahead,” Viper states, peeling her orange meticulously. Killjoy straightens up and laughs slightly. “Oops, didn’t think you’d notice this quickly. But sure,”. Viper waits for the girl to gather her words.
“I think I like one of our agents,” and Viper almost chokes on her saliva. Her emerald eyes shoot up, jaw hanging open slightly. She doesn’t hide her shock because why would Killjoy tell this piece of information to her, of all people, who is the third-in-command of this damned place that set the no frats rule?
But she recollects herself and asks, albeit hesitantly. “...who?”
Killjoy tilts her head and smiles a bit lopsidedly. “Wow, I expected you to freak… since you set the no frat rule. Didn’t think you were cool like that,” Viper frowns a bit, cringing at the slang. “But… if you insist on knowing… it’s Raze,”.
Viper should’ve seen it coming, really. In fact, she’s not even in that much shock. The two are inseparable, always glued to each other during missions. Working together in Killjoy’s lab, watching movies and whatever that the youth does these days. Viper nods slowly, wondering how she should go about this information.
Firstly, she’s torn between reprimanding Killjoy for even having feelings for someone but she knows that’s not how emotions work. And the girl hasn’t even made a move yet, thus not yet breaking the rule.
But on the other hand, with the way Killjoy was bouncing her leg up and down, an almost giddy smile on her face… Viper thinks the girl was in love. She may be only in her 30s but she’s seen enough people in her life to know that lovesick look. She had that once sometime when she wasn’t Viper.
And she doesn’t hate it on Killjoy. In fact, it quite suits her.
“But why tell me?” Viper asks, gathering up Killjoy’s tray and hers to walk towards the drop-off counter. Killjoy follows behind her, “Well, you’re one of the closest people to me. So, why not? I mean… I can’t really tell Brim, he’s my dad! Would hate to have that conversation right now,” she giggles slightly at the end.
And Viper feels her heart break and sore high at what Killjoy says. Killjoy trusts her enough to share this with her. She doesn’t think she’s had this amount of trust shoved into her hands since forever. She didn’t think she was worthy of that trust. And she might just feel a bit special because of it. Killjoy was being honest, wearing her heart on her sleeves. Killjoy didn’t care that she was a superior or if Viper might scold her. She just wanted someone to tell.
Which might be why, she turns around and lays a hand on the girl’s shoulder. “If you really want to, I’ll pull a few strings to remove the no frat rule. But you’ll have to promise me you can actually bag the girl,” Viper adds the last statement off-handedly and a bit awkwardly.
But Killjoy beams at that, smiling so widely Viper wonders if it hurts. “Really! Thank you, thank you, thank you! You’re the best,” And before Viper knew it, arms enveloped her in a quick but certainly tight hug.
She didn’t even get to say anything before Killjoy was off, disappearing into the dark hallways.
~~~
5.
Viper– no, Sabine held the tray close to her chest, standing on the porch of a beautiful and modest house. The words ‘Bohringer-Alves’ stared back at her just above the doorbell. She can hear it. The conversations beyond the doors, the laughter that she’s heard throughout her entire mid-30s when VALORANT was still a thing.
Sabine took a breath before pressing on the door and retracting her hand to her sides quickly. Behind her, Ling stood as an ever-present support. That hand that laid on her shoulder grounded her. She hadn’t seen these people in 5 years after the contract finally ended. Of course, they had the group chat and people still talked but most of them were busy with their own hustles.
Like herself, she decided to delve into vaccinology. Sabine figured the great knowledge she had about toxins and viruses could be used to create serums to combat those. Afterall, chemistry was her forte, then and now.
Sabine turned her head, met Ling’s eyes warmly. Throughout those 5 years, Ling and her shared an apartment. Not because they couldn’t afford their respective houses, but to mend what was broken among them. The tension and the space that once was, eventually grew smaller until Sabine even felt comfortable with the woman. They were friends and Sabine was happy about that.
The doors opened swiftly, revealing a half-drunk Yoru. He grinned, all teeth and Sabine realises she’s never seen that look of pure clarity on him. She smiles back.
“Snake lady and mom are here!” Yoru yelled. Sabine could hear the background sound die down before loud greetings were thrown their way. They entered the house with smiles as big as the Sun was from Earth.
Immediately upon entering, a pair of hands snatched her waist, making her almost drop the tray of sandwiches Ling and herself had made. She was just about to reprimand whoever it was that dared touch her until the person crawled underneath Sabine’s bent arms, standing in front of her with a stoic look.
They stared at each other, the room pin-drop silent.
Until the person took the tray gently from Sabine’s hands before embracing the woman even tighter than before.
“I missed you too, Klara,” Sabine rolled her eyes as the others laughed. Eventually, all eyes moved away from them and they were back in their own space. Sabine can just imagine them about 10 years back when they first met at the HQ’s lobby. One grumpy, the other excited.
Now, they both shared the same sentiment. The feeling that it has been too long since they’ve been in a room together. “You didn’t call me last week!” Klara landed a loud smack on her forearm, to which she didn’t flinch away from but grimaced at.
“I told you I couldn’t. Stop being a baby,” she retorted.
Klara let go of her shoulders before taking her hand and showing her around her new house. “It’s amazing, isn’t it?” Klara asked, hopeful, as they stood in Klara’s empty guestroom. Sabine nods, eyes trailing the blank room. “It’s all you’ve ever wanted,” Sabine says, recalling Klara telling her about her dream house a few years back. This was it. As close as it could be, but so much better somehow.
“I know right!” Klara says but her voice was uncharacteristically quiet. “It’s all because of you, Sabine,” she says next, which caught Sabine off guard. Not many are able to achieve that.
“Don’t tell me it’s because I disbanded the no-frat rule. It shouldn’t have been there anyway,” she says, smiling a little uncertainly at Klara who still looked out of character.
“No, no. Before Taya and I got together, y’know… you were the person I’d always run to. The person I’d look for in every godforsaken mission meeting and briefings. It was almost as if you were my pillar. And I know I meant just as much to you,” she says, walking to the lone window in the room. Moonlight washed her features, making them more pronounced.
But Sabine shakes her head and laughs a bit wobbly. “Right… I don’t need the sentimental dose tonight, sweetie,” she says as a joke but Klara turns to her looking as serious as ever.
“I mean it, Sabine. Thank you for all that you’ve done for me. You mean so much more than you think,” Klara says with some finality and then she smiles. And Sabine has never felt more relieved to see the ever comforting smile.
The one that didn’t show any teeth but somehow conveyed the most feeling and emotion into it. Sabine finds it in herself to smile back, all genuine and sincere.