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Paper Wars

Chapter 3: Fair Fighting

Summary:

Things escalate quickly when Juliet becomes a little too competitive and takes things a bit too far.

Notes:

I feel like Juliet can take things a bit too far when it gets competitive. I could totally see her having Thomas arrested. Pre-relationship, of course.

Chapter Text

A couple of hours passed and Thomas was just about to initiate the first phase of his plan when he saw T.C.’s van pull in to the driveway. He came outside and walked towards his really tall and intimidating looking teddy bear-like friend and before he could make it halfway T.C. turned without seeing Thomas and made his way to the front door of the main house as he carried a large brown sack with him with the utmost care. 

 

T.C. entered the house and walked into the kitchen where Kumu was standing behind the counter ready to great him warmly. 

 

“I see you’ve come bearing gifts,” Kumu said with a big grin. 

 

“Yes, ma’am. Our Higgy seems to be a little sick today so she asked if I could bring some of Rick’s famous chicken noodle soup. Rick also threw in a few of his protein smoothies for her but I don’t know if he gave up his fish oil fad or not so I would make sure she smells it first before she takes a taste just to be on the safe side.” T.C. shrugged his shoulders at Kumu. 

 

“Well, I know I won’t be smelling them for her. I love Juliet like a daughter but she’s on her own when it comes to Rick’s wild concoctions,” Kumu admitted. 

 

“That’s no way to treat a sick patient, Kumu,” T.C. scolded her mildly. 

 

“Yeah, well… Juliet isn’t really sick, you know. She’s just pretending to be sick so that Thomas thinks she’s not a threat to him. They’re in the middle of some dumb war of wits with one another. I didn’t want to get involved but now here I am. And here you are too. She’s making you bring her soup and has you thinking she’s sick.”

 

“To be fair, Higgy probably just needs to make it look good so Thomas believes it. I don’t blame her one bit. He’s good at private investigating. Any sign of things not looking up to par and Thomas will know. Give the girl a break, Kumu.” 

 

“I swear, those two need to just throw in the towel and admit the attraction between them that clearly exists. This is exhausting sometimes,” said Kumu with a smirk. 

 

“Yeah, I hear you. But they’re both in denial and neither one of them will admit to any such thing,” T.C. shrugged. 

 

“How long do you think this will drag on?” Kumu said with complete curiosity.

 

“This little game they’re playing?” T.C. asked. “Hell if I know. They’re both so stubborn and don’t know a good thing when they see it.”

 

“Maybe we need to play a little game of our own? Start our own little battle of sorts,” Kumu replied mischievously. 

 

“I think we need to add Rick into the fold,” T.C. added, “We need to take things up a notch.”

 

“Most definitely,” Kumu answered. 

 

“What if this backfires on us?” T.C. asked worriedly. 

 

“Trust me. I know what I’m doing. Those two won’t know what hit them when we’re done with them,” Kumu said smiling and evil smile. 

 

All T.C. could do was muster a return smile. 

 

**********

 

Meanwhile… 

 

 

Rick was in the Porsche on the way to La Mariana to handle some pre-business hours matters when his cell phone rang. He pressed the hands free call button noticing at the same time that it was his brother likely calling to ask for yet another favor. 

 

“Hey, Thomas. I’m going to stop you right there and just let you know I have stuff of my own to handle today and I can’t just put everything on the back burner just because you need my help.”

 

“You don’t even know why I’m calling,” said Thomas with a voice of disappointment and incredulity. 

 

“You want a favor. Don’t you? I know you, Thomas. What’s the favor this time?”

 

“It’s not even a favor. I just need your help with something,” he replied with a sort of laughter that showed even he knew it was most definitely a favor. 

 

“Thomas, that’s exactly the definition of a favor,” Rick defended, “And I don’t have time for it.”

 

“Come on, man,” Thomas began, “this is important.”

 

“Fine, but you owe me big time,” Rick said sternly into the speakerphone, “I’ll be there in ten. But I want it in writing this time. You owe me big time.” He kept emphasizing “big time” like it would change anything in terms of repayment by Thomas.

 

“Okay, whatever. Just get here,” and with that… Thomas hung up and Rick changed course towards Robin’s Nest. 

 

 

As soon as Rick hung up with Thomas, his phone rang again. He thought it was Thomas calling back so he didn’t exactly answer the phone in a friendly manner. 

 

“One favor at a time, ass…” Rick tried to say something but before he could finish his sentence Kumu interrupted. 

 

“Rick, it’s me, Kumu. T.C. and I need your help with something.”

 

Rick rolled his eyes as he was driving. It seemed as though everyone needed him for something and if it wasn’t one thing it was another with his Ohana members. He listened to Kumu and T.C.’s plan on the way to meet Thomas and let the pair know that he was most definitely in on the plan but had to handle things with Thomas first before he could focus his attention elsewhere. 

 

 

Juliet was growing restless in her bedroom under the false pretense of being sick and being confined to that part of the house did not provide a very strategic vantage point to see what was going on around the grounds so she decided to grab a pillow and a few blankets and move to the couch in the living room area downstairs. She arranged her little setup and made it look like she’d been camped out there all morning on her deathbed. It was wise of her to wad up several Kleenex tissues and scatter them on the coffee table next to her. Just the sight of the small little mess was enough to drive her bonkers, especially when she thought to herself that it was something Thomas would most certainly do if he were camped out on the couch all sick and bothered. But, she knew she needed it to look believable and took in a deep breath as she took one last look of the disastrous, once clean coffee table and made her way to the windows to get a better look at things. 

 

She wasn’t able to find anything going on or out of place and wondered what on Earth her partner could be up to out there in the middle of this war of theirs. He was up to something. She was certain of it. She couldn’t exactly go out there and look around so she decided the next best thing was to grab Robin’s new drone and get it up in the air to see things with her own eyes. She let it map out most of the property but nothing out of the ordinary was going on so she safely landed the flying device and sat down to try to figure out what her partner might be trying to do just then that she couldn’t see.

 

Rick arrived several minutes later at the estate and saw Thomas waiting for him at the gate. Thomas hopped in the car as Rick drove towards the end of the driveway closest to the guesthouse which gave them a chance to talk about Thomas’s plan. Rick wasn’t exactly thrilled about it. 

 

“Let me get this straight. Your favor… that you’re asking me to do is to be the human bait to get those highly trained attack dobermans away from the cars so you can hijack them against the wishes of one scary former British spy that takes her job as majordomo very seriously. Am I getting this right?”

 

“Rick, I can’t be the bait because I have to steal the cars.”

 

“Do you even hear yourself, Thomas?”

 

“It’s not really stealing, Rick. You know what I mean. Higgy thinks I can’t do it. I have to prove to her that I can.”

 

“And what happens if I’m not as fast as those dogs? I mean, there’s really no ‘if’ about it. I’m not as fast as those dogs.” Rick said smirking at Thomas with a face honestly wanting to know the answer to the question he just asked his friend. 

 

“It’s not going to happen so don’t worry. Once you lead the dogs far enough away and I have a chance to get in the car, those dogs will turn their attention back towards me but it will be too late.”

 

“I don’t like it, Thomas,” said Rick as he shook his head in defiance. 

 

“Just trust me,” replied Thomas, “Have I ever let you get hurt before?”

 

Rick knew the answer. Thomas did always look out for his brothers. 

 

“Consider this a really, really big favor from me,” answered Rick. 

 

“I always do,” Thomas said winking back. 

 

Just then, Juliet walked by the window and saw the two dogs loyally at their posts just as she’d asked them to be. She smiled appreciatively and breathed relief as she turned towards the couch and reclined with a book in her lap. 

 

Thomas dialed his phone. 

 

“On-Star customer service. My name is Alisha. How may I help you today?”

 

“Good afternoon Alisha. It’s a pleasure. I’m having a rough day today it seems the battery in my key fob has died and I’m not able to start my car and I need to get to work. Is there any way you can help me out? I don’t want to be late.” Thomas winked at Rick like he knew exactly what he was doing. 

 

“I can definitely help you with that,” Alisha the customer service rep replied, “I just need your name, your home address and your birthdate.”

 

“My name is Robin Masters. My address is 41-505 Kalanianaole Hwy, Waimanalo, 96795. My birthday is August 4.”

 

“Thank you for that information, Mr. Masters. One moment please while I remote start your car.”

 

“No problem, thank you Alisha.”

 

“Mr. Masters, it appears as though you have quite the garage there in Hawaii. Could you please tell me which car you’re trying to start?”

 

“Yes, sorry. I guess I should have included that information. I apologize. I’m trying to drive my Ferrari California. The VIN number ends in 7TU02.”

 

“I appreciate that information. One moment please.”

 

Magnum gave a thumbs up to Rick who knew it was time to create the diversion. Rick went into ‘diversion mode’ and started running at full speed by the two dobermans. Once they saw Rick fly by, they left their posts and followed him towards the beach like three blurs in the wind. Magnum took the opportunity to run up to the California and hop inside. As soon as he did so, the car engine turned on remotely and Thomas Magnum wore the biggest grin he could muster as he backed the car out of the garage and drove slowly past the main house, revving the engine and honking the horn with jubilee. 

 

Higgins jumped to her feet and sprang towards the window, immediately taking notice that it was her black convertible, rather, Robin’s black convertible… the one specifically forbidden by her that Thomas Magnum would never be allowed to drive and there he was taunting her from behind the wheel with a big smirk and bouncing brows. She had gave him a look of complete disbelief and he could see the anger come over her as he smiled at her through the window. She ran out the front door towards the car as he stepped on the gas and waved at her from behind, his hand moving side to side above his driver’s seat as the front gate closed behind him. Once he got to the highway he let his foot sink on the gas pedal and cruised off victoriously. 

 

Juliet wasn’t about to let that slide. Thomas Magnum would not get the best of her. Nope. Not going to happen if she had any say in it. She walked over and picked up her cell phone and dialed. 

 

“Honolulu Police Department. How may I direct your call?”

 

“Hello, my name is Juliet Higgins and I would like to report a stolen car.”

 

“When was it stolen and what type of car, ma’am?”

 

“It was just stolen from its residence in Waimanalo. It’s a 2018 black Ferrari California. License plate Robin-3.”

 

Juliet hung up the phone. A voice spoke from behind. 

 

“You called the cops on Thomas?” Kumu said questioning her in disbelief. 

 

“I did what I had to do Kumu.”

 

“You don’t think this little game of yours is getting out of hand?” Kumu waited for an answer. 

 

“He’s the one who started all of this, Kumu.”

 

Juliet walked into the study with Kumu close behind. She entered the safe’s combination and opened it up seeing all of the keys safe where she left them. 

 

“How did he?” Juliet looked confused. 

 

“Don’t look at me. I wasn’t involved,” Kumu said shrugging her shoulders. 

 

“I don’t know how he was able to get the car started without…” as she said the words out loud she realized the car was able to be started remotely. 

 

She grabbed her cell phone and dialed the car’s security company. 

 

“On-Star customer service, this is Dave, how may I help you?”

 

“Yes, good afternoon, David… I just reported my car stolen and it appears to have been started remotely. I have all of the keys locked in my safe so I’m calling to see if someone pretended to be the owner and have your service remotely start the car.”

 

“I’m happy to help you, ma’am. Could I just get some basic security info from you?”

 

“Most certainly, David.”

 

Juliet provided the necessary information and proved she was in fact, the person who controlled the cars owned by Mr. Masters. 

 

“Could you please turn the car off remotely, David?”

 

“I could kill the engine, ma’am but it’s not always safe to do so if someone is driving the car,” the agent replied. 

 

“Please don’t kill the engine then, David. Could you just track the car and report its location to the Honolulu police department?”

 

“I can do that ma’am.”

 

“Thank you,” replied Juliet. 

 

Juliet hung up the phone with the security company and about thirty minutes later her phone rang and she answered. 

 

“Higgins, why is Magnum sitting in one of my jail cells?” Katsumoto asked in a stern and annoyed voice on the other end of the phone. 

 

“It seems as though Magnum stole one of Mr. Master’s cars and took it on a joyride,” she replied honestly. “As Mr. Master’s employee I was obligated to report the car stolen.”

 

“Why are you two wasting my time with this?” The detective’s patience was growing thin. 

 

“Car theft is a serious issue, Gordon,” answered Higgins. 

 

“Come and get Magnum before the two of you cause me a bigger headache than usual. I don’t need him taking up space I don’t have here for some stupid quarrel between the two of you. If you’re here before the hour is up, I won’t have the car impounded. Otherwise I’m sending the bill to Robin.”

 

Juliet rolled her eyes and looked over at Kumu. She spoke in a matter of fact tone back into the speaker, “I’ll be right there, Gordon. My apologies.”

 

She tried her best to cool down before arriving at the jail holding cell. As she walked inside she was planning on what to say to her partner when she came face to face. The moment he saw her he decided he would take his opportunity to say his peace first. 

 

“You had me arrested, Higgins? This was supposed to be a friendly game of wits, Higgins. Nobody needed to get arrested here. But you always seem to take things a bit too far when it gets competitive. This is just crazy. You suck the fun out of everything. Maybe you need to analyze why that is. Nobody likes a poor sport, Higgins. That’s exactly what you are, you know. A poor sport.”

 

“I asked you not to take the car, Magnum. You clearly disobeyed my directive.”

 

“Your directive?” Thomas wasn’t looking pleased at all. “It was a friendly competition.” He emphasized ‘friendly.’

 

Juliet stayed silent. 

 

“You know what happens when you take the friendly out of a friendly competition?” Thomas asked in an angry tone. 

 

All she could do was just stare back at him wondering what happened and where it went wrong. 

 

“You get a war you just might not like,” replied Thomas. 

 

“What is that supposed to mean, Magnum?”

 

“I guess you’ll find out, Higgins.”

 

“Magnum, wait…” 

 

Thomas paused before storming out of the police station entrance. 

 

“Could you please drive the California back to Robin’s Nest?”

 

“What? And let you have me arrested again? No thanks.”

 

“I can’t drive two cars at once, Magnum.”

 

“That sounds like a ‘you problem’ now doesn’t it, Higgins?”

 

Juliet shook her head as Thomas left. She dialed the phone once more. 

 

“Kumu, could you be a dear and please take an Uber to the police station. I need someone to drive the California back to the estate.”

 

Kumu did just that and Juliet finally made it back home to discover the mess she left in the living room and she didn’t have the energy or heart to deal with anything just then. She plopped into the blankets on the couch and melted into them as she curled up and thought about what transpired that day. The living room wasn’t the only mess left for her. Was Thomas right about everything? Did she suck the fun out of everything? Did she take competition too far? Should she have called the police on him? And what was this war he was referring to that she might not like? As she thought about everything she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep on the couch hoping to put it all behind her.