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“Are you a masochist?” Jin-Woo asks, his face frozen in an unfathomable expression.
Thomas quickly wipes the blood running down his chin, before spitting the one that accumulates in his mouth onto the floor. He has already lost three teeth since the start of the fight, he would like to avoid losing more – even if it is easily repairable with the right care, it is never pleasant. Jin-Woo knows that his mouth is the most sensitive part of his face, because it's the only place he targets, switching from blows against his jaw to attempts to bite his lips and pull out his teeth.
He has not managed to hit his opponent once since the start of the fight. It’s almost infuriating – yes Jin-Woo is getting stronger every day, but Thomas knows him better and better, he knows how he works, how he thinks, the way he fights, the way he dodges, the way he hits. And yes, he had hoped to, at least, be able to touch him once. It’s a dismal failure so far.
"Not really, no.” Thomas answers, without really thinking about the question.
It's not that he doesn't want to think about the question, it's that his opponent doesn't give him the time to really ask himself and think about it. Jin-Woo continues the blows, hitting the most sensitive areas of his body and not giving him a second of respite between his attacks. Thomas is not slow – some may think so because of his physique, but he is faster than all his men; on the other hand, Jin-Woo moves much faster than his eyes can follow.
And he is vicious, much more than his often impassive face might suggest. Do they know, those who speak of Jin-Woo as a savior, that he is more monster than human?
“Don’t lie to me Thomas.” He whispers, inches from his ear, before punching him in the stomach, sending him flying a few meters.
“I am not a masochist.” He replies, his voice not tight enough to block his indignation.
He gets up without difficulty, and tightens his arms in front of him more by instinct than anything else to counter another punch. There was a time when it would have been shameful to be so clearly beaten. Thomas was on top of the world, his strength was his only true supremacy. Today, and everyone knows it, it's a source of pride just to be able to stay alive during training with Jin-Woo. It’s infuriating, not being able to defend himself better – but a source of pride all the same. Few are capable of it.
Maybe it's also because Jin-Woo is taking it easy on him. But Thomas won't admit it out loud.
“So you don’t feel pleasure when I hit you?”
And Jin-Woo is next to him, without Thomas having seen him move; he hits the back of his knees and drags him to the ground, one hand around his neck. The floor cracks beneath his back, the gymnasium tiles shattered into pieces under the impact and Thomas grimaces, because he feels like several of his bones are no longer whole.
“You hit hard, Jin-Woo.” He responds again, getting up more slowly.
Jin-Woo steps back a little, in several rapid movements, as if he were almost flying. He's quiet when he moves – his feet don't make a sound, his kicks don't make a sound, his shadows don't make a sound, and sometimes Thomas wonders if he even stops breathing to be quieter. Jin-Woo can't be mistaken for a predator, he doesn't stalk his prey, but he likes to have fun with it, and he gives Thomas all the time he needs to get back on his feet.
"And?” Jin-Woo asks, turning to him, a small smile on his face.
“It’s not really a context for feeling pleasure, no.” Thomas responds immediately, getting back into a fighting stance.
But Jin-Woo doesn't attack.
He tilts his head to the side, his smile fading to give way to a questioning expression. It’s quite amusing, seeing him show his emotions so clearly from time to time. It's only for his family, and for Thomas - even if, in a way, Thomas is part of his family. The rest of the world has no right to it, the rest of the world has and will always keep the serious and insensitive image of its most powerful hunter.
It’s crazy how everyone is wrong about him.
Jin-Woo is an impassive machine when he fights, but when he is with those he cares about, he can be himself, can feel and show all his emotions. And Thomas knows he has a lot.
“You… You realize that I can feel your emotions, right?”
He feels Thomas' emotions the same way he feels Jin-Woo’s own feelings. It’s interesting, the way their bond works.
“Yes, I do understand that – quite proud to have been able to find myself a soulmate like you.”
Thomas remembers the fear he felt through their bond when Hwang Dong-Soo kidnapped Jin-Woo's young vice guild master; of his anger and bloodlust when they met. No ; Jin-Woo rarely lets emotions cloud his vision; but that evening, Thomas was able to taste a sample of the deep rage that resides in his soulmate.
“So you are aware that I feel the pleasure you feel when I hit you?” Jin-Woo asks, taking the time to articulate each word.
“It’s just training Jin-Woo, and unless you’re going to let me take you to my bed, that’s a subject I’d rather not discuss.”
Is Thomas a masochist? Maybe. Maybe not. He doesn't know, it's not like he's really been able to test it. There aren't many people on Earth who can hurt him, and he doesn't trust Reed, Zhigang, or Bachchan in any way. And yes, he happened to sleep with them, after particularly trying missions, but Thomas would never have let them approach him with a weapon; he could never have put himself in a position of weakness in front of them.
Jin-Woo is powerful, more powerful than any of the other hunters, and Thomas trusts him. Would Thomas like to be in a position of weakness in bed with him? Maybe. He doesn't know anything about it, he's never thought about it, and he's not sure he wants to think about it.
"Why?”
“Because I don’t particularly want to realize I have certain fantasies if I can’t test them afterwards.” Thomas responds, and it's as honest as possible.
Jin-Woo frowns and scratches the back of his head. He takes a few steps back, and just like that, for the first time since they've been training together, the fight ends in a draw.
“Who says you can’t?” Jin-Woo asks, and he keeps his tone of voice a bit playful, but Thomas feels the mix of emotions inside him.
“Um… You? " He answers. “When you ripped my arm off the last time I tried to touch you.”
"Still angry about it?” Jin-Woo asks, a slight smile dancing on his lips. “It was an instinctive reaction.”
Thomas had placed his hand on his ribs during one of their meetings. Everything was going well, and Thomas didn't even necessarily want to go further, it's just that he felt comfortable, at ease, and that he wanted to be a little closer to his boyfriend. And then, when his hand rested on his clothes, the air froze and Thomas had lost his arm before he even realized that Jin-Woo had moved.
It was sexier than anything else.
“Or the time before, when you sent me to the hospital because I tried to kiss you.”
And maybe this time, Thomas wanted to take things further. He and Jin-Woo had been officially dating for a year, and had been seeing each other for months before that. And everything was going well, everything still goes well, but Thomas made a stupid joke, and Jin-Woo laughed and he was so handsome, so, so, so handsome that night. He leaned towards him, clearly gave him time to push him away, and Jin-Woo pushed him away sending him to the hospital.
Sexy as hell, minus point because Thomas doesn't really remember it.
"Maybe you're just too fragile?" Jin-Woo smiles, but his emotions are still tumultuous.
“And you’re just mean.” Thomas simply answers. “I would let you do it, you know? If hurting me is how you want to get me, then I wouldn't have a problem with that.”
And ok, he's weak. He's in love. He feels like he's rediscovering what it's like to love someone, and he hasn't experienced that since he was fifteen. He makes himself look good when he knows they are going to see each other; he walks past some stores and thinks about what he could get Jin-Woo; hell, he dreams of him almost every night and when he is in the United States, he sleeps with one of the hoddies that his soulmate left him. He's in love, and if Jin-Woo wants to have him, he can have him any way he wants.
“I…” Jin-Woo pauses, takes the time to find his words. “I don’t think that’s what works for me; I don't like to hurt the people I love.”
“And you love me.” Thomas replies.
He doesn't need to hear it; the feelings Jin-Woo lets flow through the bond are a big enough response.
They're slumped on a couch, a few hours later, and Jin-Woo is almost pressed against him, just inches apart. It's not particularly noticeable - Thomas only notices it because, given the conversation earlier, it's a point that interests him.
“If you want to sleep with someone, I’m not jealous.” He tells him, in the middle of a not particularly interesting episode.
And that’s not how Thomas imagined the conversation would begin. This is not a conversation that Thomas imagined he would have with Jin-Woo. Maybe because he's afraid of where this could lead, because if Jin-Woo isn't, Thomas is definitely a jealous person.
“I don’t want to sleep with anyone else.” He responds, after blinking once.
Really. He does not want. He could, of course, without much difficulty. Even if he is no longer at the top of the world, because the place is taken for his soul mate, he remains second. He has proposals regularly, less since he announced that his heart was taken by no more and no less than Sung Jin-Woo and that no one is suicidal, but he still has a few requests. And Thomas just has no desire to be intimate with anyone. Call it helplessness, call it weakness – he calls it love, he calls it happiness.
“It’s just…” And Jin-Woo must feel how much the discussion is bothering him. "I care for you. I really do.”
" I know.” Thomas responds, and he makes his feelings as noticeable as Jin-Woo's are for him. "I do too.”
He extends his hand towards Jin-Woo, without touching him, to give him the opportunity to link their fingers. And that’s what his soulmate does. He puts his hand in his, intertwines their fingers and Thomas is no longer young but he feels like he's a kid again.
Next to him, Jin-Woo's emotions are a little strange. He changes emotions quickly, stringing them together one after the other as if he were thinking at top speed. It's a little strange sometimes, seeing him so serene but feeling him so agitated. Thomas knows him well, he can see in his eyes that he is thinking about a way to formulate his thoughts. And in front of anyone else, he would have just said what was on his mind; in front of Thomas, since they decided to give their bond a chance, Jin-Woo takes more care in formulating his thoughts.
“Do you know what I like most about sex?” Thomas asks, to distract him a little, and because he knows that this is the subject that would have eventually come up on the table.
" …No."
“When the other person likes it as much as I do.” Thomas explains, and he rests his chin in the palm of his hand. “There’s no point if it’s not something mutual or I can jerk off when I want.”
And Thomas would like to sleep with Jin-Woo, he would like for his desire to drag him into bed is mutual, and for them to have fun together as easily as they do on the battlefield. But Jin-Woo doesn't want that, not in the way Thomas wants it anyway.
“I don’t need to sleep with you Jin-Woo.” He continues, because he is not sure if his soulmate would understand otherwise. “I would love to, I really would.” Because it has to be said anyway. “But it’s not a need.”
Thomas can be content to continue touching himself for the rest of his life, he has no problem with that if it means he can fall asleep next to Jin-Woo, that he can continue to see him as many times as he wants – and no matter what Thomas wants the world to believe, he's not young anymore, he no longer needs to take care of his libido every mornings or so.
“We could try if you wanted.” Jin-Woo offers, looking him in the eyes.
“Do you want to try?” Thomas responds simply, already knowing the answer.
“…No, probably not.”
And it's a bit strange because Thomas knows that Jin-Woo loves him, and he himself has never loved someone without wanting to get intimate with them. But Jin-Woo doesn't want that. He loves him, but he doesn't desire him. And Thomas will never force him to want that.
“Then we won’t try.” He responds, and Jin-Woo has a soft smile on his face, as he leans towards him a little, and their shoulders touch.
When they see each other again, Thomas doesn't try to kiss him. He puts a hand in his hair and quickly messes it up. It's easy. Jin-Woo rolls his eyes, but he still looks amused, and they walk side by side towards a restaurant where they plan to eat. It doesn't need to be complicated.