Chapter Text
Tim Bradford found himself weaving in and out of pain, just as he weaved in and out of consciousness. All throughout the time he smelled a floral scent he knew by heart but hadn’t smelt in years. He heard his name and opened his eyes to see a man over him and his white coat spoke to him being a doctor. He was speaking to the retired police officer but Tim only caught a few words as he fell unconscious again.
Injured.
Car Accident.
Bleeding.
Any Pain.
These were the words that Tim caught as he fell back under. Even as he did, he felt a pressured on his hand that was so soft it couldn’t be the physician since he’d felt their harsh movements to help him and his injuries. None of it was soft.
He heard words from a voice he’d only had in videos for over twenty years. “Tim.”
Opening his eyes, he found soft brown eyes looking at him and he could cry at seeing her face beyond the videos and pictures in his house. “Lucy?” He wanted to touch her but he felt like he was encased in concrete. “I can’t move.”
“Shh.” She ran the back of fingers against his cheek. “You’re here and there, between life and death.”
He wanted to stay there forever with her, but before he could speak she faded away. “Lucy!” His voice felt rough as pain filled his whole body once again.
Beeping filled his ears and he heard his name from someone other than the woman he loved and lost. Opening his eyes, he found a nurse looking at him with worry. “Mr. Bradford, welcome back, we nearly lost you.”
“Why?” He asked, wanting to know why they yanked him back and away from her. The nurse took it differently.
“You were in a nasty car wreck and lost a lot of blood. It took a while to stabilize you and we may have to again. You’re in a precarious state, is there anyone who can make decisions for you if you fall unconscious again?”
He thought about who he should call and he immediately decided on Genny, she was his medical proxy after all. “My sister, she should be on my records.”
“Okay, I’ll call her.”
“Can I sign legal papers?”
The nurse sighed, “not in your current state, you’re on pain medication and unable to make conscious decisions in that manner.” She patted his arm, “try to rest.”
He closed his eyes and prayed to a god he didn’t believe in that he’d see Lucy when he did. She never came and he was sure after a while that she was a hallucination. Despite it, the smell of rose water stayed with him and a gentle pressure on his hand. It took time but Genny showed up and he’d seen her just a few days before. Time had been gentle with her and so her ageing had been slow, looking ten years younger than she was. He was much the same way, gray hair and lines on his face the only added features of aging over twenty years.
“Tim, I came as soon as I could.” She took his hand. “The nurse told me what happened.”
“Genny?”
She leaned in, “yeah?”
“Let me go if I take a turn.” He begged her, “just let me go.”
“Tim, why are you asking me that?”
He just gave her honesty, “it’s been twenty years, I’ve lived a good life and enjoyed so much in that time. The job, friends, family, grandchildren, but she’s not here. The days get harder the longer I live, the pain continues. I made a promise to not let it consume me but somedays I feel like it will. I want to be with Lucy if it happens, just let me go if the time comes.”
The expectation that Genny would fight him or argue with him was present but in the end, she nodded. “Okay. Will you let me call Tamara?” He nodded, “okay, I’ll call her.” Tim found himself falling asleep as Genny spoke about his great-niece and nephew, about how they’re just learning the walk.
He remembered Tyler asking him what he had planned to name his children when the couple were trying to find names for the twins. If he’d picked any out with Lucy when they spoke of children. Tim told him the truth that they’d chosen Zoe for a girl and Theo for a boy. For children that would never exist because that future had been taken from him. When he’d met the twins days after they were born, he’d learned they’d been given those names. His great-niece had been named Zoe Gennifer and his great-nephew had been named Theo Timothy, a fact he’d only smiled at and felt it was right that those names weren’t lost to pain and tragedy. He’d gone straight to the cemetery to tell Lucy like he always did after big events in life.
Big events and every Saturday, those were the times he gave to Lucy. It should have been every second of every day instead of a few hours a week but he’d long accepted her death. The five stages of grief that she’d gone over her last day as a rookie had been what he’d gone through over the first year after her death. When he’d heard Austin Rip had been shanked in prison due to some internal prison dispute, he’d felt numb. The man would never be held accountable for Lucy’s death, the trial months away from the day he died. In the end, acceptance came and with it subtle pain that existed every day but he kept his promise to her, the last promise he’d ever make to love of his life.
His pain seemed to ease and constant beeping fell away again and he figured he was asleep. Instead, he was wrapped in concrete again and he heard his name. Opening his eyes, he found Lucy looking down at him. “Tim.”
“Lucy.” He wanted to touch her but he couldn’t move. “Why can’t I move?”
“You’re in between.” She smiled at him, “it won’t be long.”
“I’ve missed you.”
Lucy ran the back of her hand against his cheek. “I’ve always been with you, I never left. I told you I would be.”
The hold seemed to ease slowly and when he felt his hand free, he reached up to put a hand on her cheek. “Twenty-one years without you.”
“Not anymore.” She told him as he sat up to hug her, to hold her for the first time in decades.
“Our forever.” He whispered against her hair, her rose water smell and pressure only her holds could bring surrounded him.
Genny Bradford walked back into the room with Tamara beside her. When her brother had coded late into the evening, before Tamara had even arrived, she’d told them to stop. Her brother didn’t want any life-saving measures and so they left, allowing Tim to die. Tamara was crying, the family she’d had since her teens were gone. Her parents had died when she was young, then Lucy and now Tim. She had her husband and Little Lucy and Nathan, but she had lost another father just moments before.
“Why?” Tamara asked her through tears. “Why didn’t he want to be saved?”
Genny hugged her, “he’s been in pain for years, Tamara. He felt it was time and so I honored his wishes.”
She nodded, “he wanted to be with Lucy.”
“Yeah he did. We got him for years longer than we thought he’d survive. Everyone, even you, wondered every day of every year if we’d receive a call regarding him.”
After a few minutes, Tamara caught a breath and said what she knew was coming. “We have to tell everyone.”
The funeral wasn’t as grand as Lucy’s own but modest, with only graveside honors. Cops did come, so many that more people were standing than sitting. Tamara held onto her daughter’s hand, the girl was in high school but had been close to her grandfather. Telling her had broken Tamara’s heart, even more she asked ‘why ‘and the woman had to tell her daughter the reason her grandfather was no longer alive. Genny was there with Tyler and Ryan, Tyler’s wife was also beside him but the twins weren’t.
All of Tim’s friends from Mid-Wilshire were present, all of them still alive but most were retired. Angela Lopez had read a poem that she felt was perfect because it showed the internal spirit that was Tim Bradford. What was hidden under the hard exterior.
Angela looked at those present, tears fell from her eyes as she looked down at the poem in her hands. “Tim Bradford was my best friend and although he showed an exterior that was all hard and no non-sense, he had a warmth that he showed so few. When I searched for something to read, I came across this poem and knew it was perfect to show who he really was.” She began to read the poem so all could hear.
When I die
Give what’s left of me away
To children
And old men that wait to die.
And if you need to cry,
Cry for your brother
Walking the street beside you
And when you need me,
Put your arms
Around anyone
And give to them
What you need to give to me.
I want to leave you something,
Something better
Than words
Or sounds.
Look for me
In the people I’ve known
Or loved,
And if you cannot give me away,
At least let me live in your eyes
And not on your mind.
You can love me most
By letting
Hands touch hands
By letting
Bodies touch bodies
And by letting go
Of children
That need to be free.
Love doesn’t die,
People do.
So, when all that’s left of me
Is love,
Give me away
Wade Grey stood up next and spoke to those present. “I want to thank everyone who came to this funeral and graveside. Tim Bradford was a man who dedicated twenty-five years to the LAPD and did many amazing things while serving the public. What many of you may not know is that Two feet to the right of this grave is the grave of Officer Lucy Chen, his partner on and off the job. I want to remind everyone that while we grieve and feel the pain of his loss, he is no longer feeling the pain of her loss. Twenty years without the love of his life, he’s finally at peace. I’ve spoken to Parker Center and we’ve officially renumbered District Nineteen, meaning that Seven-Adam-Nineteen is going to be retired. It was the district they rode for years and after giving a last call given today at the funeral home, it’ll never be used again.” Taking a moment, he continued. “Tim Bradford was a man who loved his family and so every heart at the LAPD, retired or active, is grieving with his family. If you need anything, don’t be afraid to reach out to the large family that you are now a part of.”
Genny nodded and put an arm around Tamara, the woman wiping away tears. Devon had a hand on her back and was trying to silently reassure his wife that he was there. As the small family cried together, bag pipes played as a flag was brought over and given to Genny. The woman gave it to Tamara, only for the woman to give it to her daughter. The girl clutching it hard against her chest.
Angela Lopez found herself looking at a grave after attending the funeral of a detective she’d known in passing. After the graveside service, she’d walked a little bit and came to the granite headstone that was hard to read but it got easier as the years went on. Laying a single rose down on the stone, she nodded. “I miss you but I’m glad you’re reunited with her. Maybe in another life you guys got what you should have had here. Tamara’s a grandmother now, hard to think of that considering Lucy is seventeen, but stranger things have happened. It was a boy and she named him after you, both of you. His name is Timothy Chen Davenport. Just because you’re gone, it doesn’t mean you’re actually gone. You’re living on in name and photos and videos. There are stories of one or both of you that float around Mid-Wilshire every day, or so Celina says. You’d be proud of her, she’s now captain of the station.” Taking a breath, she nodded. “See you around.”
With that she walked away from a grave that had the names of two officers with their dates of birth and death, but also a few words that seemed to mean everything.
CHEN-BRADFORD
7-ADAM-19
PARTNERS IN LIFE AND DEATH
FINALLY TOGETHER. FOREVER.