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Harvey spoke to her from the safety of his desk.
“I’m not going to acknowledge it because nothing happened last night.”
Donna walked to the edge of his desk.
Harvey stood. His eyes are fixed on her.
"Fuck you, Harvey Specter..." Donna said to him in a voice so controlled, so low, that it even surprised herself.
She held her breath.
A beat.
She turned on her heels, ready to hide. Her unexpected courage, wavering. She hadn't made it to the middle of his office before she heard him.
"What did you just say to me?"
Donna could feel the heat from Harvey's 8,000 dollar suit covered body. He stood inches from her now. She took a deep breath and willed her unsteady legs to turn around. Her cheeks flushed with anger and something more—desire, maybe.
"You heard me."
They were standing face-to-face now. Inches apart. The air was thick between them and Donna tried to slow her breathing.
Even with her four inch Manolo Blahnik heels, Harvey still had some significant height over her. Donna puffed her chest, not wanting him to see her fear. She wasn't afraid of Harvey; she knew he'd never hurt her.
She was afraid he'd see what she was most afraid of. Her feelings for him. Why should she be the one to reveal what they both knew already?
Harvey, already denied the truth; that's why they were in this mess in the first place.
Even in the dimly lit office, she could see his sharp, piercing chocolate eyes.
Harvey pursed his lips and she watched him clench his jaw. In her peripheral vision, she could see him rub his fingers together; it was a habit of his she had noticed early on in their relationship.
Relationship. Or, what’s left of it? She thought to herself.
“You need to leave…NOW... ”
His voice was deliberate with a low timbre that carried an undeniable sense of authority and it made her body shiver.
Donna bit the inside of her cheek. She refused to give him the satisfaction of letting him know that he had gotten under her skin.
By the time she made it to the women's restroom, she felt like she was going to throw up. She paced back and forth, trying to shake the last 24 hours from her existence.
Her mind was racing. So many emotions flooded her brain.
Anger. Love. Desire. Despair. Fear.
She leaned forward, and her hands braced the long marble sink edge. Donna stared at herself in the bathroom mirror, watching the warm tears stream down her cheek.
She must have been lost in thought because, when she saw his reflection in the mirror, she didn't have time to gain her composure. She quickly turned and tucked her hands behind her bottom to hide them from Harvey. She didn't want him to see them shaking.
He slowed his pace and before he could make it any closer, she shut her eyes and firmly yelled, “Stop!”
He did.
She opened her eyes and when she finally gathered enough strength, she willed the words from her mouth. “I am tired of you dictating everything about this relationship. You don't get to always be the one that's right.”
He opened his mouth to talk, maybe to argue with her, but she kept going. She was pointing her finger at him now. “You, Harvey Specter, are wrong this time. And I'm not going to listen to you anymore!”
She gasped for air when she was done. The risk she had taken was more than she had thought she could handle, but if her speaking her mind meant losing Harvey, then so be it. Because for the first time in a very long time, she felt like she could be in the same room with him, and he didn't suck all the air out of her.
She could see his chest rise and fall with every quick breath he took. His eyes intensely searched her face for clues. He was the best closer and Donna knew he was trying to get a read on her and the situation.
It’s what he did. Play the man, he’d say. Well, not this time. She wouldn’t let him.
“What do you think you're doing?” He was calmer now and his words were steady and concise.
Donna paid no attention to his switch in demeanor. She was feeling stronger now. She put one long leg in front of the other, meeting him in the middle of the restroom.
“What I'm doing, Harvey, is telling you that you don't get to decide how this thing goes. What I decide to do. What I feel...”
He shook his head. “There is nothing to discuss, like I said—”
She interrupted him. “You're an asshole.”
An indignant smirk settled on her face and she could tell it startled him. Maybe she even threw him off his game. Donna knew name-calling wasn't the most mature thing to do, but by god, she was pissed and she just needed him to show some passion—some love toward her. She hated him for being an asshole, and she hated herself for letting him get to her.
He huffed. “Donna…”
“Don't Donna me. You don't get to call me by my first name anymore. You don't get to call me, ever! In fact, I never want to see your smug face again!”
God, it felt good to yell at him, she thought and her voice quivered as she continued.
“And another thing... unlike you, I'm not a chicken shit. I do love you, Harvey; in fact, I'm in love with you! But you're so goddamn stupid to see past your own insecurities and fears of what-ifs that you won't even try! So yeah, fuck you and this job. I quit!”
Tears ran freely down her face. She didn't give him a chance to respond; instead, she pushed past him, making a beeline to the bathroom door. But before she could edge herself around him to leave, he grabbed her wrist.
Her breath hitched and she thought Harvey's did too.
“Let go of me!”
“No.” He told her. “You don't get to call me names and not give me the chance to defend myself. That's not how this works.”
She turned on her heels so fast that she almost fell, and Harvey steadied her by moving his hand to her elbow and she equally hated and loved him for it.
His eyes followed her lips when she spoke and it caused her body to shiver. “I don't think you heard me…”
“Oh, I heard you, Donna. I heard you tell me to fuck off. But I don't think you mean it.” His voice was lower now, like gravel and instead of letting go of her elbow, he held on tighter.
Harvey continued. “Then I heard you call me an asshole, and that you probably meant...” Donna rolled her eyes and scoffed at his attempt at an olive branch. “And I also heard you tell me that you loved me, and I—”
“Save your sanctimonious bullshit, Harvey. I'm done.”
She tried to wiggle her way out of his grip, but he was too strong. And it made her pissed that she couldn't break free. But deep down, something else was rising to the surface. Her cheeks warmed and her body had a strange mix of anger and desire pulsating through it.
She wanted to punch and kiss him at the same time and it was maddening. How in the actual HELL did she get herself into this mess? She should have never taken that job offer from him. She knew as soon as she told him to put their one night together out of their minds that there was no way she was ever going to forget it.
Harvey had wrecked her that night and she knew she had fallen for him.
“God, HARVEY… you're so... so... ugh!”
“I'm so what?”
He moved closer now, and she could feel his body graze her own. His eyes were a deep, wild brown and she swore she might fall if it wasn't for the hold he had on her. Literally and figuratively.
“So…so MUCH! You're so much and I can't... I can't keep giving you everything and you give me nothing in return! Harvey, you're hurting me.”
Donna’s voice trailed. And when she looked down at his hand on her body, something in him snapped.
Maybe it was what she said or how she said it, but he quickly let go and stepped back as if he had just kicked a puppy. He looked mortified. Scared even.
But then fear turned into indifference and it always amazed Donna at how quickly he was able to switch his emotions.
“Har—”
“Just go, Donna.” He nodded toward the exit.
She huffed. Hands on her hips. “Oh, now you want me to go?”
“For fucks sake, Donna, I'm letting you go. Now go!! That's what you want, isn't it?!!”
She frowned. Of course, it wasn't really what she wanted. She wanted him to WANT HER.
“No, Harvey. It's not what I want, but you're so selfish and you can't see past yourself to see that all I want is for you to...”
“FUCK DONNA! WHAT!”
Wild in his eyes now.
She shrugged her shoulders and shook her head. Her knees were weak and her stomach felt like it had a million butterflies in it. She started to back up slowly. She was convinced that he would never pursue her—he never wanted her like she wanted him.
"Nothing, Harvey; I give up. You win.”
“Goddamnit Donna, why can't you be satisfied with how things are? Why do you always have to push me? Why can't you be over there... and I'm over here... and that be okay?”
He was using his hands as he spoke, like he was delivering a closing argument. He was trying to convince her that all her years of pining and longing for him were somehow wrong.
He was trying to close her and this messy chapter they were in. However, Donna refused to let him get off that easy. He needed to feel the same loss she felt every time she gave him her heart, only for Harvey to never return his own. He needed to suffer like she did.
“Because, Harvey. I can't, and I won't. Goodbye Harvey… I love you. I've always loved you." Her eyelids felt like they were led from all the crying she had done. But ironically, her tears had all but dried up now. And instead of turning around, she continued to walk backwards, staring at the man she loved—watching him not do a damn thing to fight for the woman he loved.
“You're a coward, Harvey Specter.”
She didn't mean to sound so cold when she said it. And she instantly regretted saying it.
Harvey puffed his chest.
His brow furrowed.
His jaw clenched in anger.
“That's it! I've had about enough of you, Donna Roberta Paulsen!”
And before she could say or do anything else, Harvey's hands were around her waist. His torso was flush against her chest and his lips were pressed firmly against hers.
It all happened so fast.
Her body was putty in his hands. And when she whimpered against his kiss, Harvey’s fingers dug into her hips in response. Pulling her closer to him, like he never wanted to let her go.
Oh, god. Harvey's lips were soft and warm.
Muscle memory kicked in, and as soon as she opened her mouth, he pushed his tongue past her teeth in a feeding frenzy. Their tongues and breath tangled in a passionate, messy exchange. He tasted like longing and strawberries. When the need for air finally caused them to separate, Donna pulled back and slapped the shit out of his face.
A beat.
“Oh god! Harvey, I'm... I'm sor…”
Donna was horrified, and based on the look Harvey gave her in return, she suspected he was too. He cocked his head in the direction of her slap. She covered her mouth with her own hand, trying to stop more words from pouring out.
He leaned in close and she stiffened at his sudden invasion of her personal space. He whispered into her ear. “Don’t ever do that again.”
She closed her eyes as his lips stayed behind and grazed her skin at the top of her neck, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind. His hot breath seeped through her flesh and her body shivered in response.
Donna did not want him to stop.
Harvey pulled away, and what he did next surprised her even more. He forcefully seized her hips with his hands, then slid them around her ass, pulling her toward him. When he lifted her, she instinctively wrapped her legs around his waist. Her lips found his again, and this time, she took his bottom lip between her teeth, sucking and biting it as she pulled away. He winced from the pain but didn’t stop. He only quickened his pace, quickly whisking her around toward the sink counter and then what she did next surprised her. She reached for his face, and this time, when he clenched his jaw, she saw something inside him that made her insides melt and her stomach flip.
She looked straight into his velvety, mahogany eyes—eyes that she spent years getting lost in—and said, “Fuck me, Harvey. HARD!”
If her words surprised him, she couldn’t tell. Because before she knew it, he had not so gently put her down on the granite bathroom sink countertop, stinging her ass when he did it. She hissed in response, but the sudden pain only made her want him more.
“Is this what you want, Donna?” He asked her as one hand reached under her dress and pulled at her black lace thong underwear, ripping them from her center. A throaty moan escaped past her lips as Harvey pushed her against the mirror, devouring her neck with his mouth. His hands kneaded and pulled at her thighs.
“YES!" Her hands dug into his arm as she surrendered her legs to him but her hands pushed his chest away. He grinned at her contradiction and when he stopped, she whined.
“Fuck, Harvey… ” she whispered in frustration under her breath.
Harvey quickly removed his suit jacket and tie as he watched her pull her maroon dress above her waist, inviting him back into her folds. When she stared into his eyes, they let her know just how much he was going to destroy her.
Tingling pressure and her wet arousal pooled between her legs and when his hand palmed her pussy, she screamed.
“I hate you, Harvey Specter... I hate how you control me!” She said into his shoulder as he positioned himself above her.
She gasped as his fingers teased her opening. And when he moved them between her slick folds, she reached for his shirt and fisted the expensive fabric, pulling and tugging for it to come off his body. He plunged two fingers inside her and she grasped frantically for his chest for support.
In and out.
Two fingers, then three.
She could feel her walls tightening with every thrust. Harvey’s lips found hers again and when their mouths collided once more, it was Harvey who bit her lip this time.
Donna ripped the buttons right off his shirt in response, moving her hands under his white t-shirt soon after. Her fingers pulled at the faint dusting of chest hair along his smooth, warm skin and if she could, she would have crawled inside him.
He moved his mouth to her cheek, then along her jawline and down her nape. He whispered against her skin. “I hate the way I lose control when you're around me. The way your hair smells when you walk by me. The way you look at me day in and day out. You drive me crazy, Donna. Everything about you makes me want to forget everything about myself,” he confessed.
Donna heard everything he said but all she wanted was Harvey inside her. She worked at his belt, then the zipper, freeing his hard-on.
Harvey moaned in anticipation.
She took the length of him in her hand, then she pumped him several times for good measure.
“Hard and fast… “ he said between gasps of air.
“Hard and fast,” she repeated.
Then, as if on cue, he forcefully pulled her hips closer with his free hand, aligning with her center and she helped guide his dick between her legs.
And when he finally traded his fingers for his dick, he entered inside her. They both let out a passionate sound. Harvey held her briefly, and as their gazes connected, she placed her hands on his ass, urging him on.
Silently begging him.
Her mouth opened, but nothing came out. She held on tightly to his shoulders as he pushed deeper and with every fast thrust, she moved closer and closer to her release.
Harvey was vigorous and rough but soft and gentle at the same time and it drove her crazy. Every part of her body craved every part of his.
“Harder…” she instructed him. She wanted him to fuck her senseless.
Harvey did just that.
He tightened his grip around her ass and with every thrust, he pushed deeper and faster inside her. The intense friction caused her body to shake and when she started to feel her climax build, she dug her hands into his back.
“Here I come. Fuck, Harvey… HERE I COME!” She screamed and he chased her orgasm with his own, filling her up with his hot cum.
Harvey braced his body with his hand against the mirror, and Donna wrapped her arms around his neck as she continued to have small aftershocks around his still hard dick inside her.
She rested her head against his strong shoulder and when he finally pulled himself out, they winced at the sensitive sensation it caused both their bodies.
Harvey slowed his breathing down. “The next time we do this, it will be in my bed and I'm going to take my time with you.” He said.
“Next time?” She asked him sheepishly.
Harvey helped her with her dress, then scooted alongside her on the countertop. They were both leaning against the mirror, staring into the empty bathroom.
He reached for her hand, and she took it.
“Yeah, Donna. Do you really think I'd fuck you like this and not want more of you?”
“I… I don't know. I guess I thought you didn't want me.”
When she said it, she realized how stupid she sounded.
“Didn't want you? Shit, you're all I ever wanted.” He was tracing circles with his thumb over the top of her hand when he continued. “And you were right about me being an asshole and a chicken shit. But not anymore.”
Donna giggled. She covered her face with her free hand. “I'm so embarrassed by the way I behaved. You drive me crazy, Harvey Specter.”
“Don't be. Some people work their shit out; we fucked our shit out. Tomato, tomahto.” He chuckled.
“Honestly, I craved you more than my own happiness at times, and that's what scared me. Because I had goals, and I thought I needed you here…” He was pointing to the room, implying the firm, “...but, really, you were always here.” He finished, pointing to his heart now.
“I love you, Donna; I guess I always have.”
She sighed and pulled him in for a soft, lingering kiss. When they pulled away, he tilted his head and asked, “Can I take you home with me?”
Donna smiled and he returned his famous Specter grin.
“I thought you'd never ask,” she replied.
~The End~